Cross the Rubicon: Choices
Chapter 127: Interlude XXIII: Flash of Insight
Previous Chapter Next ChapterPulling up to the curb, Flash Sentry threw his car into park, glaring irritably at his steering wheel as if it had personally wronged him. His phone vibrated in his pocket; he ignored it, knowing full well it was his mother, either trying to guilt trip him after their fight that morning or trying to continue the ridiculous story his parents were insisting on pushing on him.
“You were out late last night, son,” his father commented as the family moved around each other in the kitchen, preparing for the day.
Flash shrugged. “Working the closing shift on Wednesday now—stayed after school late. Sunset’s organized a group tutoring and is helping several of us bring our math and science grades up. In return, I’m helping a bunch of people out with history, and our friend Rarity and this guy, Thunder Strike, are working on helping with English.”
His mother’s gaze sharpened. “Sunset organized it?”
“Uh…yeeeah…kind of. A bunch of us were asking her for math tutoring and this was what she came up with so she could help all of us at once.”
A frown pulled at her features. “If you're having trouble with your schoolwork, you should have said something to us. We can get you a real tutor.”
Blue eyes narrowed. “I’ve found a tutor, probably the best math tutor in the tri-county area. And it's free.”
“I don't think its a good idea for you to be spending that much time with Sunset Shimmer, son,” his father commented. “You're just setting yourself up to get hurt again.”
Flash looked back and forth between his parents. “What are you talking about? I told you, Sunset and I are just friends.” A friendship he was learning brought him way more satisfaction than dating Sunset had. Sunset the friend was much more open and emotionally upbeat, with warm smiles and laughter and jokes. It felt…good…to be counted among the redheaded former-pony’s friends and confidants. “And I like being friends with her.”
“How do you know it's not another of her games? She claims to have a girlfriend, but can you prove it? Have you even met this girl—do you even know if she really exists? Because there’s a chance that Sunset is playing on your sympathies and making the whole thing up to get you to stop being upset over her.” His mother’s words were crisp, and she’d stopped in the act of packing his sister’s lunch to give him a long, piercing look.
Rolling his eyes, he stabbed his waffles with a fork. “Yes, Mom, I know her girlfriend really exists. When she got smacked in gym, I gave her a ride to her girlfriend’s house so she wouldn’t be home alone with a concussion.” Sensing the next words about to come out of his mother’s mouth, he cut it off early. “And that's all I’m going to say about that, because her girlfriend isn’t out, and it's not my place to say. The only reason I told you is because you didn’t want to believe me otherwise.”
Bitterness crept into his voice. “Not that it seems to have done much good.”
“Flash,” his dad said warningly. “Your mother and I are just concerned. This girl hurt you badly, and we know what it's like to be a teenager. We just don’t want you to be leaving yourself open to getting hurt again.”
“Or to being used,” came his mother’s addition. “Like to give her free transportation, or do homework for her because she doesn't want to do it herself.”
Annoyance and frustration became a defensive anger, and Flash stood up from the table with the ugly sound of his chair scraping on linoleum. “Stop it! Do you even hear yourselves? You're so busy trying to find a way to cast Sunset as a villain that you aren't listening to anything I’ve said! She’s not the same as she was when she dated me—she has busted her ass to turn her life around, by herself, and figure out who she wants to be! Yeah, I was hurt, and I was angry for a while, but she and I talked, and I found out things I didn't know before, things that explained why it all happened…”
He scowled. “Sunset isn't manipulating me. Before we talked, she was avoiding me. I approached her. I confronted her after I made some choices I’m still not proud of. I chose to listen to her, to hear her out. I chose to forgive her. I chose to be the bigger person and offer her my friendship, because she doesn't have anyone else but her friends. I chose to hang out with her, to ask her for math help because she’s the smartest kid in our school. I chose. Me. Not her. So if you want to be mad at someone for it, be mad at me.”
Stalking to the trash can, he tossed the breakfast he’d made away, his stomach too sour feeling to even contemplate eating. “Or maybe,” he said over his shoulder as he grabbed his backpack, “maybe you guys can actually trust that I’m not an idiot or a little kid, and believe that I’m capable of taking care of myself and choosing my own friends.”
With that, he slammed the door behind him on the way out.
Flash unbuckled his seatbelt. He was angry and he needed time to clear his head, which made him glad he had another closing shift at his job that night. Of course, his anger didn’t stop him from making good on his promise from earlier in the week to his mother to take some boxes of books to the used bookstore before work. Which was why he was in the city proper, awkwardly parallel parking, and even more annoyed than before.
Why they couldn't just take him at his word, he couldn’t understand. Yeah, so maybe he hadn't told them everything about what had been going on since the Fall Formal, but…that was understandable, given…well…everything. His folks were not likely to believe a wild sounding tale about magical otherworlds, fiery demons, and mind controlling fish horses—no person who hadn’t seen it for themselves would, and was the biggest reason it had all been kept secret by the students. No point in telling someone the truth only to be called a liar and for parents to assume it was a cover for something else. Besides those specific omissions though, he’d always been honest and straightforward with his parents, and they’d always trusted his judgment before…so why was now any different?
He hauled himself out of his car, still trying to puzzle that out. Had he acted that different when he’d dated Sunset? Did they think he’d hidden the depth of their relationship the few times they’d come home to find the pair firmly ensconced on the couch playing video games or watching a movie? There hadn't been anything to hide, really—even then, Sunset had been…he would have called it emotionally reserved, or even shy, and at the time he had thought it meant she was letting her guard down, that he was seeing the softer side of the school’s most popular girl. As a result, he’d been careful about his conduct, letting her take the lead while he focused on trying to be the best boyfriend he could, the way his parents had always told him he should treat a girl.
He hadn’t been entirely wrong—it had been an act, her relationship with him, but he could see that reservation had definitely come from somewhere a lot deeper, since he could see it in the conversations they’d had about her Twilight.
Lips curled subconsciously into a small grin as he lifted the heavy boxes out of his trunk. Sunset Shimmer was dating Twilight Sparkle—the human one, but…Flash couldn't blame her for her taste in girls. If she was even half as cute and smart as the pony princess he’d crushed on, then he wouldn’t be afraid to admit to being a little envious of his redheaded friend.
And wasn’t that the crux of it all? He was genuinely happy for Sunset, for the fact that the person—pony, he supposed—that he thought he’d glimpsed a year ago had really been there, buried deep, and that she’d managed to bring that person out. Seeing Sunset smiling and laughing…seeing her happy made him feel good, and having his parents suggest that he was still pining after her, with only the thought of ‘winning her back’ or soaking up whatever affection she decided to throw his way made him angry. Made him feel…dirty, in a way, because such a thing would mean he was trying to break up her and Twilight…and just from listening to her talk about her girlfriend, that would be an act simultaneously cruel and selfish to both Sunset and Twilight. Flash was a lot of things, but cruel was not one of them.
Hefting the boxes, he pushed the door of the bookshop open with his elbow, nodding to the guy behind the counter. With as much as his mother exchanged books there, Flash coming in to drop off a few boxes in exchange for store credit on her account was normal. Once the boxes were set down, it was a quick and fairly quiet exchange, which suited Flash just fine. His mood meant he didn't feel much like small talk, more focused on brooding over his fight with his parents over Sunset.
There was an old saying his grandpa had been fond of: “Speak of the Devil and he shall appear.” Flash had never really understood the real depth and meaning of that saying until he realized he heard a familiar voice laughing in one of the aisles.
“Sparky! That’s terrible!” More laughter. “Merciful moons—I will never be able to unsee that!”
Girlish giggling, and another voice that he recognized answered. “Misery loves company, Sunset. Consider it payback for what you told me on the way over.”
Flash cast his eyes heavenward as he took the receipt with his mom’s updated store credit amount on it. Clearly someone up there thought this was funny, and he found himself unsure as to what to do. Should he say hello? Or quietly slip back out? Sunset had said neither of them was quite ready to show Twilight off to Sunset’s friends.
Biting his lip, he put the decision in someone else’s hands, messaging Sunset. -Do I want to know what it is you can't unsee, pony-girl? Or should I just leave and pretend I heard nothing?-
There was more giggling and laughter in the aisle, before it suddenly quieted at the chirp of a phone. A moment later, he heard, “Sunset?” Then the sound of booted footsteps with that familiar, confident stride, as his ex-girlfriend strode from one of the aisles and locked eyes with him.
“Hey, Sunset,” he offered with a sheepish wave. “Thought I heard your voice.”
Abruptly, he found himself the focus of a pair of sea-green eyes that seemed to see far too much in that moment, and he knew he hadn’t covered his emotions well enough to escape her intuitive perception.
"You alright, Flash? You...look kinda rough—did something happen?” The redhead gave him a visual once over, head canted slightly to the side.
Rubbing the back of his neck, Flash hesitated, weighing how to answer. Part of him did want Sunset’s advice, but not only was it not fair to dump on her about how his parents viewed her, doing so by barging in on what was probably a covert date by being the needy ex-boyfriend was really not the kind of introduction he wanted to have with her Twilight.
Instead he settled on, “Long day, math quiz, big history test, and I got into it with my parents this morning and I’m just glad I’ve got a closing shift at work to calm down. Just…normal ‘rough stuff’, nothing to worry about…” Flash caught himself before the ‘pony-girl’ slipped out, remembering at the last second that she wasn't ‘out’ about her origins to her girlfriend yet.
And given the nervous purple eyes staring at him from around Sunset’s shoulder, a girlfriend that was probably unsure of what to make of him anyway.
“Are you sure you're okay, Flash?” Sunset pressed, and he knew this definitely wasn't the time or place for him to talk about their shared history.
“Oh, um…yeah, I’m good, Sunset. It's nothing to worry about. Mom and Dad just…don't like some of my…uh…recent life choices…and I told them where to go. Nothing they won't get over and that I won't survive…” Flash raised a hand, shifting his weight and hoping he wasn't about to make a total fool of himself. He waved in what he hoped was a friendly fashion, smiling in his friendliest manner. “I’m…guessing this is the…um…friend…you told me about last week? I’m totally crashing here on you guys hanging out…I’m sorry for invading your space and all, I just overheard you talking and wanted to say hi…so…um…hi? I’m Flash Sentry…one of Sunset’s friends?”
Shit. Just from the expression on Sunset’s face he knew he was babbling, and he really wished he’d just left quietly and said nothing. Or that the floor would swallow him. That’d be really great.
He glanced down, hoping he would get his wish.
Nope.
No such luck there. The floor stubbornly didn't eat him, and no weird magic or explosions interrupted, and he didn't wake up from an embarrassing dream.
Damn.
Then he heard a giggle, and looked up to see Sunset’s Twilight hiding her mouth behind a hand, eyes crinkled up with laughter.
Sunset’s staring turned into a wicked smirk, and she nudged her companion. “You’ll have to forgive Flash. He forgets the English language around pretty girls.”
The dark haired girl turned and poked Sunset’s shoulder. “Sunny! Dont be mean.” She turned back to Flash and with a slow breath to steady herself, she stuck out a hand. “I’m Twilight Sparkle. It's nice to meet you, Flash. Sunset’s told me all about her other friends.”
He grinned, trying to put her at ease. “I can only imagine what you’ve heard,” he laughed, shaking her hand with the lightest touch he could, and the instant she started to pull her hand back, he let go.
Getting his first real good look at her, Flash could see right away what Sunset meant about the two Twilights being very different. The pony princess he called friend had been about five or six inches taller and now that he saw a Twilight who looked like a high schooler a year or so younger than himself, it made him realize that the one he knew didn't look like a teenager. She looked like a college student masquerading as one. If they’d been side by side, he’d take them for sisters but not identical twins.
“Good things,” the lavender skinned girl said, bumping her shoulder into Sunset’s arm in a way that seemed so natural and right that Flash couldn't help but feel his grin grow more heartfelt and less awkward and staged—especially when Sunset responded by draping that arm casually across Twilight’s shoulders, tugging the smaller girl into a sideways hug that even he could see held a hint of protectiveness to it.
Flash chuckled. “I’m glad she stuck to the good stories and didn't tell any of the more embarrassing ones.” He glanced at Sunset as he spoke, catching her while her gaze was focused on the girl at her side, and what he saw hit him with the full force of a mack truck on the highway.
There was a light in those blue-green depths that he had never seen before, and as her lips curled up into a warm, affectionate smile, that light spread to her whole countenance. Even here, among the teetering old shelves overstuffed with tattered paperbacks, her presence and emotions burned blindingly bright, and all of that was turned on the petite girl who was hugging her now around the waist with one arm, all laughter and friendly smiles.
“How do you know if you're in love?” Sunset had asked him, and he’d fumbled with a vague, uncertain answer he’d heard from his parents and from how he’d come to that conclusion about her when they’d been dating.
His answer had been wrong. You look at somebody like you are right now, Sunset, he thought. Like they're the reason you draw breath…That’s how you know…
It hurt a little, rubbing an old scar that had just really healed, but not in a bad way, he realized. It confirmed what she’d said to him, what he’d been coming to grips with since the day they broke up: that it was never going to be him that she loved. Not the way he’d wanted and hoped at the end of the summer.
Because Sunset never looked at him that way…and…for all his infatuation…he had never looked at her like that either. This was on a whole different level than anything he’d ever witnessed or felt, not from any of the kids at school or even from his parents and his grandparents. Even just standing there in that unguarded moment, when the two girls in front of him were looking at each other, emotions written on their faces as surely as any ink, he felt it warm him inside the same way the rainbow magic had, an uplifting, airy sense of something good and right and full of light and wonder…kind of like being a kid on Christmas morning.
No…she’d never looked at him like that. Or anyone, as far as he’d seen before. This Twilight was special, more than he’d realized. Though…given what had happened with the princess one, maybe it was all the more appropriate that the human Twilight was the one to bring this light out in Sunset Shimmer.
Sunset tore her focus away from her girlfriend—and anyone who saw that display would never mistake them for anything else—and grinned crookedly at Flash. “Oh yeah, lots of good things, I promise. I focused on the fun stuff and not on how awful you are at Mario Kart.”
Twilight laughed again and nudged the redhead with a hip. “Sunny! Give him a break. You have a distinct advantage in subconscious reaction times far faster than most people.” Purple eyes dancing with laughter met his again. “She told me about how nice you were, how you reminded her of my brother. Which tells me that you're a great friend and a great person, Flash, because Shining Armor is my BBBFF—Big Brother Best Friend Forever.”
He felt his face heat a little at what was clearly the highest of praise from Twilight. “I…try. And believe me, I wish I had a sister like Sunset—my actual sister is…”
“A mouthy brat who likes to make you turn funny colors?” Sunset offered dryly, adding in an aside, “His little sister is like nine or ten.”
The young man made a face. “Something like that. So yeah, Sunset’s kind of like the better sister, and..bonus, we don't have to share a bathroom in the morning.” The words were out almost before he thought of them, and it shocked him to realize they were true. The care and affection he felt for his ex-girlfriend was more akin to what he felt for Ivory, or even his cousin Dancing Lights, than it was to the intense emotions he’d felt months ago, and…that felt good and right to. Like this place somewhere between friends and siblings was exactly where their relationship had been meant to end up.
“Lucky me,” came the sarcastic response. “You have more hair products in your bathroom than Rarity, and that’s an accomplishment.”
Flash groaned. "Please don't remind me...”. When Twilight gave him a puzzled look, he elaborated. “My sister, Ivory, keeps convincing our mom to buy her a whole bunch of different brands of hair products because she's sure this time that these ones are going to be just right for that frizzy mess she calls hair. Of course, that's until she hears about the next newest brand from a friend, and that's the perfect one…”. He rolled his eyes. “And of course, lucky me gets all her unwanted products dumped on me, because 'it's wasteful to just throw them out, so just use those up.’ Except with the endless cycle, I never can.”
Twilight bit her lip, then suggested in a soft, somewhat nervous tone that the princess had never used, “If you really don't want the products, what would you say to boxing them up and donating them somewhere they could really use stuff like that?”
Rubbing the back of his neck, Flash shrugged. “Sure, I’d be down to do that. What kind of place are we talking?”
Toying with a bit of her hair, the nerdy girl explained, “There’s this charity that my sister-in-law is involved with that could really get use out of stuff like that. It helps kids in need, especially teenagers and stuff who’ve either run away or been kicked out of their homes by their parents. They have a center in town that’s a safe place, and the kids can have a hot meal, a shower, a dry place to sleep, stuff like that. Even if the hair products have already been opened, it would be a major help, and the kids would be happy to have nice things to use.”
Flash’s smile broadened—he was going to like this Twilight, he decided, for more than just her effect on Sunset Shimmer. “You are every bit as brilliant as Sunset said, Twilight,” he told her earnestly, amused by how she flushed at the compliment, “and a total lifesaver.”
“I…wouldn't go that far…”
Sunset reached over and tweaked her nose. “No, he’s pretty on point there, nerd. You're amazing.”
He laughed as the smaller girl made a flustered sound. “I mean it, Twilight,” Flash reiterated. “Absolute, total lifesaver. I swear, if I didn’t know better, I’d think the bottles were breeding—not only are they overflowing the bathroom, but now they're even finding a way into my bedroom to crowd me out!”
Sunset cackled with laughter, curling the fingers of her free hand into mock claws and making a wet sounding growl. “Watch out, Flash!” she warned. “They're coming for you to make you smell like a girl—all flowers and sugar!”
He pretended to recoil in terror. “No! Anything but that! Help me, Twilight Sparkle! You're my only hope!” One hand stretched out beseechingly.
It had the desired effect—the dark haired girl dissolved into giggles, and from the grateful look Sunset shot his way, Flash decided he’d done exactly the right thing with this encounter.