Act 1 part 4: Meet Celestia

Going back to Twilight's was a bit of a drag, because halfway there my drunk ass tripped and fell, so Princess Luna had to Carry me the rest of the way. Then when she set me down in front of the door I bumped my head on the short ass doorframe, right in front of everyone... Yeah... Saying I was embarrassed would be an understatement... So after the laughter faded we all sat down and... Indulged In cake and icecream.

I thought I should find out some more about this little "trip" Mac and I were about to go on.

"Hey Princess... When exactly are we leaving for canterlot?" I asked curiously. Luna turned to me and put here food down.

"Well it is up to thee really... We can leave tonight or tomorrow, whichever is preferred."

"Well what do you think?" I said as I looked at Mac and Twilight.

Twilight sat in thought while Mac spoke up almost immediately.

"Ah say we just leave tonight... No use waitin around.." Mac said with a shrug.

"Well I'm not bringing much... So we can leave tonight..." She said with some uncertainty.

Spike quickly jumped up excitedly.

"Oh! Oh! Oh! Can I come too?" He asked as he ran in front of Twilight with a pleading smile.

"Sorry...I don't think so Spike...somepony has to watch the library while I'm gone. Princess, how long do you think we'll be gone?" Twilight asked.

"Hmm...we are not sure... It should only take a few hours... But the doctors may make thee stay longer..." Luna said.

Spike's face fell and he returned to his seat and shoved cake into his mouth.

"Well I haven't slept at all sense I got here so... If I try and sleep before we go then I Know I won't even bother to get up in the morning..." I said honestly with a shrug.

"Hmm...it seems thy should leave tonight then..." Luna said as she summoned a scroll and quill to appear in front of her, yet another example of how useful but physics breaking magic is.

"We shall inform the guard to have a Carriage arrive in one hours time..." She said as she wrote the letter. When she sent it off it kinda just flashed away instead of her burning it... Huh.. I guess everyone does it differently?

Everyone finished their food quickly, because most of us didn't get too much in the first place because of eating at that lame party.

Applejack cleared her throat before standing up and stretching.

"Well ah think I should start headin out... Gotta wake up early in the mornin... And work will be a might harder without Big Mac around.." Applejack said with a sigh. A few moments later Rarity stood up and stretched too.

"Well it is getting quite late and I have many orders to fill tomorrow, I also must get my beauty sleep..." She said. Spike suddenly looked up from his cake He was giving Rarity this weird look... What's his deal?

"I have a bunch of parties to make, sweets to bake and frowns to break!" Pinkie said cheerfully as she started to hop around the room. This bitch doesn't walk like the rest of them... She hops around like a fucking rabbit... Something is definitely OFF about Pinkie...

"I really must get home.. Angel must be starving without me..." Fluttershy said in a barley audible tone. My god this Pony should take lessons from Luna... She's so quiet... Which is funny because Luna is so loud... Maybe they can learn from each other...

"Eh... I'm bored...this lack of awesome is making me sleepy... I'll see you ponies around..." She said with a casual shrug.

After that they all stood up, then they started...nuzzling... It was really awkward, is that like hugging for them? Seems way too personal for my taste. Thankfully, nobody here was tall enough to nuzzle me besides Mac and Luna, and I knew there was no way in HELL Mac would nuzzle me, and Luna... Well there isn't much I could do to stop her but I'm pretty sure she's too into Mac anyways.

And with that they wished Mac and I Good luck and then they disappeared out door, leaving Me, Luna, Mac, Twilight and Spike sitting awkwardly.

"We believe the Royal carriage should arrive soon so just Relax..." Luna suggested as she layed back on the coach. Her and Twilight started talking about something while Mac and I just sat a few feet away silently. Spike walked over to us and sat. We kind of just ignored him for the most part until he started whispering something.

"So Big Mac... What DID happen last Season?" Spike asked curiously, making sure the girls couldn't hear.

"Ah said later!" He whispered sternly.

" Besides... You're too young to know anyhow!" He added.

"Aw come on! I know what happens during mating season... I'm not stupid..." Spike said with a roll of his eyes.

"But..you're a baby! How the hell do you know that?" I questioned.

"I live in a library... You really think that I wouldn't get curious one day and read about it?" Spike said, folding his arms.

"Besides..." He said, a confident smile crossed his face.

"Everypony calls me a baby, but really I'm more of a teenager!" spike said pointing a proud claw to himself.

"But... You're tiny..." I said with confusion.

"It's true! I just know I'm getting a growth spurt soon!" Spike said as he looked to Mac hopefully.

"Ah still AIN'T gonna tell you Spike..." Mac said as he folded his forehoofs.

"Come on Big Mac! Did she get you in your dreams?" Spike asked curiously as he pleaded for some kind of answer.

Mac held his hoofs together nervously as he answered.
"Sorta..." He said with a nervous Smile.

"Wait what the hell do you mean by she got you in you're dreams ? " I asked, confused.

" Princess Luna has the ability to enter other ponies dreams..." Spike explained.

I just starred at him with a deadpan expression looking between the two of them in disbelief.

"Really?"

"Eyyup!"

I just kept staring with a blank face, not buying any of this shit.

" Go home Mac you're drunk... "I said with a roll of my eyes.

" Huh?"

"Never mind...", he probably won't get that joke...

A few silent minutes passed, well for us anyway, Twilight and Luna were still happily talking away. Mac started to fall asleep and i almost dozed off too before a pony knocked on the door. Probably the carriage...

Twilight happily answered, sure enough this male Pegasus pony wearing armor was at the door. This was the only other male pony I've seen so far...up close... I saw a handful In ponyville. To be honest this guy isn't that big... Maybe pegasi are just smaller than regular ponies... Or maybe Mac is just making him seem small. Something was different about him though... He looked like a...bat? Or a vampire? Or both maybe? I guess that's just how the guards Dress here? If its supposed to intimidate people than it sure didn't work...

"Greetings Princess Luna.." The pony that looked like the leader said as he and the other 3 guards bowed respectfully.

"Greetings Black dusk... We trust thee have had a fine night thus far?" Luna said as she acknowledged the guards with a friendly nod. Black dusk? Seriously? the names here...

"Indeed I have Princess..." He replayed plainly, his face showing barely any emotion whatsoever, I think he takes his job too seriously...

Luna cleared her throat and turned back to the rest of us.

"Is everypony ready to depart?" She asked.

"I'm ready!"

"Eyyup!"

"Sure whatever..." I said with a shrug that made Black dusk raise his brow slightly. I guess the guy isn't used to anyone talking to Princess Luna like that.

A moment later we all walked out the door, "See ya spike! I'll be back soon!" Twilight said with a wave, he waved back and shut the door behind us.

The guards led us to what looked like a long, sleek, night themed carriage with a large green eye on the front... These ponies have design issues... Why the hell is there a big eye instead of something more relevant to Luna like oh I don't know...THE MOON!

The guards attached cables to themselves and got into formation while everyone got into the carriage. Mac and I sat first, we each sat on the far ends of the comfy seat. Twilight then sat next to me while Luna sat in between Twilight and Mac. Mac started to fidget nervously while Luna signaled the guards to take off.

I noticed Mac looked really stressed out, and it doesn't look like Luna is the cause...

"What's your problem Mac?" I asked worriedly.

"Ah...ah kinda...hate flyin..." He said with a nervous gulp.

"Ha! Flying is fine! Come on don't be a wuss..." I said with a laugh. It was kind weird... I was really afraid of heights but I never had problems flying back home.

Luna suddenly grabbed Mac into another crushing embrace.

"Tis alright that thou art afraid... We shall comfort thee.." Luna said with a giggle as the poor red stallion struggled for air. Jesus girl let a guy breath! She eventually loosened her grip and just settled with nuzzling Mac affectionately while he sat with a sheepish grin.Twilight and I just looked at each other with deadpan expressions.

I looked over to the guards and they were all watching the scene and snickering behind thier hoofs except Black dusk who gave them all a stern look, making them nervously snap forward.

They all started to run and the carriage lurched forward slowly. We began to pick up speed, and eventually the Pegasi opened their wings and we were in the air, accelerating quite fast through the night sky.
The wind was blowing through my face and I looked below to see the tiny dot that was now ponyville. Honestly I was getting kinda nervous now... This is kind of... Different...

"I thought you said flying was fine..." Twilight said with a smug grin.

"I know but this is way different compared to human air transportation.." I said with a cringe as I felt a pit in my stomach.

"How so?" Twilight asked curiously.

"Well for starters they are completely closed off and airtight, So no wind blowing in your face and no chilly night air. Also you can't see as much on a human plane, they just have tiny little windows." I said sheepishly.

"Hmph... Whatever you say..." Twilight said as she turned away from me. I got that drunk feeling again and I suddenly had the urge to yell strange things.

"Yeah! I'm Santa motherfuckers!" I yelled suddenly, making everyone stare at me wide eyed in confusion, even the guards turned back to my little outburst. I'm guessing they also have no clue who Santa is either so they wouldn't get the reindeer pulling a slay thing.

The guards slowly turned their heads back with worried expressions. Then it seemed like it was Mac's turn To do some stupid shit, because He was slowly scooting away from Luna to the edge of the carriage. Unfortunately he somehow managed to forget where we were and he fell right off the edge... Yeah....good thing Luna has magic...

The guards were now looking back, even more concerned this time. Twilight noticed their troubled gazes and spoke up.

"Heh...You know how it is... with Golden Bud Cider!" She said dismissing them with a hoof. Their mouths were small "o's", as understanding suddenly dawned on them and they turned back, well I guess this Golden Bud stuff is a common problem. I'm pretty sure beer NEVER worked like that back home, so I can barley imagine the other crazy ass food and drinks they have in equestria.

After a few minutes, I started to doze off, but Twilight suddenly jerked me awake. I put my head up with an annoyed sigh.

"What is it?"

"That's Canterlot down there!" Twilight said as she pointed to a nearby mountain. My jaw dropped, this place was...amazing! It was a fancy white marble and Gold city with a large castle on the far edge built on the side of a big ass mountain. My amazement turned to anger when I realized the whole thing was held up by only 1 support. I deadpanned and folded my arms. Luna raised a brow at my reaction.

"Do you not Like my sister's fair city? She has worked very hard on keeping it the way thee see it now..." Luna asked.

"No its great and stuff but...wait I thought you rule the place too?" I said as I narrowed my eyes.

"We do but I was not around for the citie's initial construction... We had...er family issues at the time..." Luna said with a nervous smile. Normally I would have gone further but I was too drunk to care anymore, so I just nodded and sat back in my seat.

...

"DJ wake up!" Twilight said as I jerked awake again. I turned to see everyone staring at me, except Mac who was just waking up too. It was then that I realized I was leaning on Twilight and I quickly got up, It was odd that I somehow wasn't crushing her.

"Er...my bad..." I said quickly with a nervous smile.

"Oh don't worry about it..." Twilight said with a blush, ugh... not her too! I can't be that good looking to them...

I looked around and we seemed to be in a landing area behind the castle, it had a few other carriages, a place that looked like a repair garage, and some more bat pony guards.

"My sister should be waiting in the throne room, however it is quite late so you're meeting will be quite brief." Luna said as we followed her through a few guarded doors, I was too drunk and tired to care about anything else at that moment so I just blindly followed her, it seemed Mac was in a similar boat because he was moping around next to me. We passed through a gigantic set of doors, then I looked over to Mac

"You hanging in there Mac?" I asked worriedly, the golden bud seemed to be hitting him hard.

"Hagin in there... Ah think..." He said with a nervous laugh.

"Yeah i hope we don't have to deal with this shit for too long..." I said with a sigh.

"Ah agree partner, its mighty annoying how it fades in and out..." He said, nodding.

"Let's hope the Golden Bud doesn't make me look like a jackass in front of Princess Celestia... " I said as I rubbed my forehead.

"Ahem.." Someone far in front of us cleared their throat. Mac and I looked around, apprantly we were already in the throne room. So my eyes trailed from the red carpet to a large throne chair, to a...horse?

A large white pony wearing golden...slippers? With wings and a long mane that flowed somehow like Luna's, except it was a lot longer and it was multicolored, thankfully the colors weren't ridiculous like Rainbow Dash's mane.. I think i would throw up rainbows. She was tall and slender and she had on a chest plate, necklace......thingie? It was similar to Luna's except it was a lot fancier and it had a purple jewel in the center, and atop her head was a golden crown, oh...that's Princess Celestia...danm...just...danm...I have to admit... She is one majestic looking motherfucker... Whoa... Where did that come from?

"Ah... Hello friends!" She said as she walked up to us, I quickly noticed 2 things about Celestia. #1, she is tall as FUCK, she is literally a head above me... Not even including the horn and crown and all that...which brings me to #2... That horn... Is really...REALLY long! It looked like it was around the same length as my forarm, or maybe even my whole arm! it was pretty hard to tell at the time because of the golden bud...

I kind of dwelled on the horn thing a bit to long. Thankfully, Celestia was greeting the other ponies standing next to me first.

"Tia! Tis great to see thee! How art thou?" Luna said cheerfully as they Nuzzled, jeez...ponies are really touchy feely...

"Oh I've been better... I am just a little drowsy is all!" Celestia replyed with a soft voice and a kind smile. She then moved onto Twilight, lowering her head slightly.

"Hello my faithful student! Have you had a good day?" She said with a kind smile.

"Oh yes! I didn't write a letter about it because I was coming here and it would be easier to just...you know... tell you about in person...if that's OK..." Twilight said with a nervous laugh as she Nuzzled Celestia.

"Oh it's quite alright! I would love to hear about you're day, perhaps in the morning..." She said with a giggle. Then she moved onto Mac who was looking at Celestia with narrowed eyes Ever since we got here. When she looked at him she snickered slightly.

"Hello Big Macintosh! How's the foreleg?" She asked making him narrow his eyes even more.

"Its fine...." He said as he rubbed his right foreleg with his hoof.

"Still holding a grudge are we?" Celestia asked, as she snickered again, a sly grin across her face.

"No..." Mac said sarcastically.

"Oh...well it happened so long ago... I didn't think you'd still be upset about it..." She said, looking up innocently.

"Ah know ah know..." He said with a weak smile. He then leaned in close and started whispering.

"We need to talk you're highness..." He whispered quietly.

"About?" Celestia said with a suspicious look.

"About HER...." Mac said as he gestured toward Luna, who was none the wiser.

"What do you...oh I see..." Celestia said as she realized. And smiled at her sister who just waved. She then nodded toward Mac and raised her head, then she walked in front of me... Oh shit...

"Greetings! I am Princess Celestia Ruler of Equestria! What was you're name?" She asked kindly. Unfortunately for me my brain decided at that moment to bring up a scene from a movie called the cabin in the woods, where a Unicorn brutally kills a guy by stabbing him in the chest with it's horn...yeah that helps with my fear of pointy things... It also didn't help that her height and importance was scaring me either.

"Uh..." Was all I could manage making her raise her brow.

"His name is Derrick..." Twilight said for me as I stood there nervously.

"Derrick? That's an interesting name..." Celestia said as she kept staring down at me. I could feel the drunkness coming and my fear disappearing as I talked again.

"You're really tall..." I said bluntly, Celestia just sat there blankly.

"Yes...I am..." She said after a moment, she tilted her head slightly in confusion.

"And...you're horn is...long..." I said as I stared at it.

Celestia deadpanned and leaned forward.

"Yes that's an interesting observation...but I"

"Is it a bone or something?" I interrupt.

"What?" The Princess asked, looking confused and annoyed.

"You're horn... Is it a bone?" I asked again as I examined it closely. Before Celestia could respond, I did something that in another situation I would never even think to do. I reached out and touched the tip of Celestia's horn.

I felt a slight tingle as Celestia's eyes widened and her cheeks turned as red as a tomatoes, her wings slowly stretched out until they became stiff. Mac was cringing, Twilight's jaw was on the floor and the look on Luna's face could have killed Chuck Norris.

What? I said innocently as Luna slowly stomped over to us, Twilight and Mac quickly moved out of her way.

"Unhoof Her...NOW!" She boomed at me and I quickly removed my hand, making Celestia's wings fall, she slowly regained her composure, but her nervous expression stayed the same.

"What's the Big deal?" I asked honestly as Luna stepped closer, each step made the pit in my stomach deeper.

"HOW DARE YOU TAKE ADVANTAGE OF MY SISTER HUMAN?" Luna screamed in my face, her eyes glowed white as she powered up, making me tremble in fear, seriously I just might shit myself.

Suddenly some guards rushed into the room.

"Is everything alright you're Highness?!?" The lead guard asked, it was Black dusk again, I guess he's like Luna's Right hand..er right hoof man..er..right hoof pony.

"NAY! SEIZE THIS HUMAN! HAVE HIM EXECUTED!!!" Luna boomed as she stomped her hoof loudly, welp shit just got real.

"Uh oh..." I muttered as I came out of my drunken daze, the guards rushed up to me and surrounded me, I just stepped back slowly with my hands up. They were about to tackle me whenever Celestia spoke up.

"STOP! That will not be necessary!" Celestia said sternly making the guards stop in their tracks.

"I'm sure Derrick was not aware how sensitive and personal a ponies Horn is. I also must remind you that he is still under the effects of Golden Bud Cider, which effects his Judgment and decision making..." She said calmly.

Luna sighed angrily and calmed down slightly, making her eyes return to normal.

"Fine...return to thy duties Black dusk..." She said quietly.

"Of course Princess..." He replied obediently, as they backed off and swiftly left the room, leaving it completely silent.

I quickly let out a breath I didn't know I was holding, making Luna glare at me again angrily, this time I tried to ignore her.

"What the hell is the big deal? All I did was poke her horn!" I muttered in frustration. At first nobody said anything, so I just scoffed and turned away from them all.
"Great...here in equestria you get excuted with out knowing what the fuck you did wrong..." I said aloud to Myself. Twilight cringed and cleared her throat and I turned back.

"Well... A unicorn's horn is very...sensitive to touch...it is the center of our magic after all... Touching one is considered taboo unless you're an intimate couple... " she said awkwardly. Wow... I managed to violate her... Within 30 seconds of meeting... Danm... I'm really bad at introductions.

"God Danm it..." I muttered to myself as I facepalmed. Twilight started to talk about the specifics on how contact with a ponies horn could..."arouse" a pony and what not, but I stopped listening because I noticed something.

The finger that I used to touch her horn went numb... Like completely. My hand was also shaking uncontrollably, what the hell?

Then I started to feel woozy, significantly more than before. The numbness, and shaking started on my other arm and I felt it spreading up them slowly. I stumbled backward a step in confusion, making Twilight stop her awkward rant that nobody listened to short.

"DJ are you...feeling OK?" She asked worriedly as she took a step towards me. Everyone was deep in their own thoughts so they all looked over after she said that, unfortunately I could barely even stand at that point.

The shaking spread to my entire body and the numbness overwhelmed both arms, my head now pulsed in pain, and I felt something in my nose...it was...blood? I started to breath heavily as I feel to one knee, Mac, Celestia, Twilight and even Luna quickly rushed over, what the hell happened to me? All they're eyes widened even more when they saw my nosebleed.

I slowly lost my bearings and fell forward, I heard voices calling my name before I was knocked out.

...

"Derrick! Wake up!" I heard someone scream, I suddenly jerked awake.

I slowly pushed myself upward only to realize that my forehead ached really badly.

"Thanks for catching me assholes..." I muttered angrily as I dusted myself off. I looked around and I was getting an assortment of looks, Celestia stared at me with a worried expression and she looked a bit flushed. Luna still looked somewhat angry but she couldn't hide her concern. Twilight looked speechless, she sat there completely emotionless. And Mac just cringed as he looked at me, they were all staring silently.

I then remembered the pain and numbness I felt before I passed out, and realized it was gone... well mostly. My hands still felt...tingly. The ponies blank stares started to annoy me.

"What?" I asked as I folded my arms.

"Your eyes..." Twilight said quietly.

"What? What's wrong with my eyes?" I asked worriedly.

"They're glowing..." Celestia said with a cringe.

"What the fuck do you mean?" I asked as I looked suspicious, Celestia motioned to a nearby mirror and I walked over to it.

I haven't looked in a mirror sense I got to this place, I noticed that a few things were different, all blimishes, freckles and and other skin imperfections, were now completely gone. I mean... I barley had that in the first place but still, my skin was completely clear and smooth now. Unfortunately, The main thing I noticed about myself, was the fact that my eyes were glowing a brilliant golden color.

When I saw this I jumped away as my golden eyes widened in horror. I gasped as I stumbled back and fell on my ass, staring at myself in horror.

"Oh...my...god..."

We all sat quietly as I took in my appearance. I stood up again, still staring at myself and clenched my fists.

"Is...is this a side effect of Golden bud?" I asked shakingly.

"No...this looks more like..." Celestia started, but trailed off.

"What? It looks like what?" I yelled as I turned and walked up to her angrily, she stood there silently with a worried stare.

"Magic..." Twilight cut in and we turned to her. "It looks like Princess Celestia's to be precise..." She added with a calm and serious tone.

" Wait how do you know it's even hers?" I ask.

"Well Princess Celestia's magical Aura is golden...just like yours.." She said as she pointed to me.

"Don't be ridiculous.." I said as I looked down and froze. Much like my eyes, my hands had a strange golden energy flowing from them... They glowed like unicorn horns did when they use thier magi... Oh fuck....

I waved my hands around and watched the energy flow from them, this was unreal!
However, despite all the evidence before me I was still in denial about this.

"Come on its not like I can shoot lasers now or somth...." I was interrupted by a large beam that shot out of my right hand, Luna quickly stopped it with her magic before it hit anything.

"Derrick! Thou should not be so reckless!" Luna said angrily. I turned to her and narrowed my eyes.

" How the fuck was I supposed to know that I could shoot lasers with these magical bullshit powers that almost killed me less than a minute ago!!!" I snapped at her.

"Thou art lucky we didn't slay thee for Laying a hoof on ROALTY!" She shot back as she stepped closer.

"I'm sorry for touching her and all but I wasn't even thinking properly at the moment because ya know... Equestria's crazy beer! I yelled as I took a step forward.

" Thou will NOT speak to ROYALTY In this manner!" Luna said sternly, taking another step.

"You can take your royalty and shove it up your ass!" I said defiantly. After that I heard something audibly snap as Luna's eye twitched.

"That's it..."

Luna growled angrily and charged at me, but before she got to me a wall of gold appeared in between us.

"ENOUGH!!!" Celestia yelled with a stomp of her hoof, louder then I've ever heard Luna yell.

Both Luna and I froze in our tracks as the golden wall faded away. Celestia walked up to us with an angry look of disappointment.

"Cease this useless banter! It's not going to get anypony anywhere! You can not change the events that have transpired already, so just calm your self's and accept it!" Celestia said as she scolded both of us. Luna lowered her head in shame, and I just scoffed and looked away, she may be right but right now I'm still struggling with the fact that I now have magical powers, I mean what's next? Am i going to morph into a fucking pony?(no)

Behind us Twilight and Mac let out breaths that they were holding as they wiped sweat from their foreheads.

Eventually Celestia sighed and her eyes softened.

"Look...it has been a long and stressful day for everypony... Let's all get some rest and sort this out tomorrow..." Celestia said as she glanced at all of our tired faces. Princess Celestia looked tired, Twilight and Mac were tired, hell I was tired too...after my body stopped pumping gallons of adrenaline into my veins whenever Luna was about to rip my head from my shoulders. Everyone was tired... Except for Luna... It might just be the excitement of the moment but she looked like she could stay up all night, What's up with that?

Celestia walked over to her sister who stood with a sorrowful expression.
"Goodnight Lulu... I hope the rest of the night will be good for you... And don't worry about me, I'm fine..." Celestia said kindly to calm Luna who just sighed.

"Come my ponies... I will show you where you will be sleeping tonight..." She said as she started to walk away with Mac and Twilight following close behind. Luna looked like she was about to say something to me before being inturrpted.

"You too Derrick..." Celestia called out. I just gave Luna a quick wave before jogging to catch up with Celestia and the others, she just watched me go with a sad troubled expression, as Celestia used her magic to Open the Two big ass doors.

As we passed the doors I saw the 4 guards from earlier waiting outside eagerly. Three of them immediately rushed inside while the last one, Black dusk glared daggers at me before running inside, bitch I'm not scared of you...

We passed a few more guards, some more doors and some other stuff that my drunk mind didn't pick up on before we arrived on the guest hall. it reminded me of a hotel hallway, except it wasn't super cramped and narrow. Funny thing about hotel hallways... You always seem to run faster in them...

"Wait here Derrick..." Celestia said as she and the ponies walked toward the various doors, and I just sat with my hands in my pockets and watched.

After Celestia showed them to their rooms Twilight and Mac waved to me and I waved back before they each disappeared into a separate guest room. then Celestia walked back toward me.

"Come Derrick... You will be staying in a different room..." She said calmly as I followed her sheepishly. What did she mean? Was she actually mad about this and this "different room" was actually the dungeon? Or is it some EXTRA fancy room that's for VIPs? Or maybe even...her room? No no no... I'm pretty sure she's not that fast...wait the hell am I thinking?
We walked in silence for a while, I made sure to keep next to her so we could stay in each others vision so she knew I wasn't going to try anything. Eventually I sighed and stopped walking, the Princess turned quickly looking puzzled.

"Derrick?" She said as she raised her brow.

I just looked down and fiddled with my still glowing hands.

"Look....I'm sorry that I...touched your horn Princess... I don't know what possessed me to do that but it was a stupid decision..." I said as I looked back up to her with a weak smile, she opened her mouth to speak but I countiued.

"So I completely understand if you throw me in the dungeon to rot for eternity..." I finished as I looked back up. Celestia had a kind motherly smile on her face, she sighed and walked up to me, she saw me craning my neck to look up so she lowered her head, then she put her hoof on my shoulder.

"Don't worry I'm not mad at you Derrick... And I won't be throwing you into the dungeon" she said with a giggle.

"However I wouldn't be surprised if my sister tries to..." She added, making me shudder.

"So where are we going then?" I asked, feeling somewhat relieved that I wasn't going to rot in jail.

"To my private quarters..." She said, my eyes widened and I stepped back slightly. Celestia saw my reaction and just laughed.

"You will be staying in Twilight sparkles old room, its right next to mine..." She corrected with a grin.

"Oh.." I said simply, stepping forward again.

"You seem to have quite the dirty mind Derrick..." She added with a confident grin, Making me deadpan.

"Hey its not my fault mares have been giving me... Naughty looks ever sense I got here..." I said flatly.

Celestia got a mischievous look.

"I can see why they would..." She said in a seductive voice making me jump.

"I'm just kidding!" She said as she laughed at my reaction.
I just deadpanned again and waited for her to stop.

"Are you done?"

Celestia just nodded and cleared her throat.

"What do you think of Twilight and her friends?" She asked curiously as she waited for my response. Oh boy...I'm not holding back on this one!

"What do I think of them? Hmmm let's see here... I thought Twilight was alright at first but then she got really creepy and annoying when we started talking about magic or science.. She even gets this weird face when we do..." I said with annoyance.

"Hmm...she does do that a lot.." Celestia said with a nod, cringing slightly.

She leaned in and whispered to me.

"Honestly I think she needs to get out more... Maybe even find a nice young stallion..." She said and I nodded slowly, suppressing my laughter.

"Please don't tell her I said that..." She added quickly. I nodded and continued.

Then there is Spike... I met him first so he had me thinking equestria was full of talking lizards..." I said, shaking my head. Celestia just giggled as I countiued.

"He's OK I guess... I don't think he likes me very much for some reason but that's irrelevant... I still have a hard time believing that pipsqueak is actually a dragon..." I said with a scoff.

"He is indeed a dragon... Just give him time. He may one day surpass us both in height..." Celestia said with a grin.

"Then there is Applejack... Her and her big brother are actually alright I guess, I could consider them friends.... Especially Mac..." I said with a shrug.

"Good! Its always nice to make new friends..." Celestia said with a nod.
At this point I was just ranting.

"Then there is Rarity....oh god... She's insane! She made fun of my clothes and tried to force her's onto me! Then when she apologized she flirted with me and creeped the fuck out of me!" I said with a shudder.

"That seems like something she would do..." Celestia said as she cringed again.

"Then there is Rainbow dash... Besides her annoying colossal ego, she OK... But she just pisses me off because of the impossible things she does! How the fuck does she fly with those tiny ass wings! How can she even touch clouds and bust them like they were solid objects? Fucking physics breaking magic!" I said as I folded my arms.

"She does brag about her weather control... A lot... But you have to give her credit... I'm pretty sure she could beat me in a race.." Celestia said as she smiled sheepishly.

"Then there is Pinkie Pie and...I just don't understand her...like at all...how does she even....I don't even know... She threw me that dumbass party that caused the golden bud incident! But...I can say she makes the best cake I've ever tasted!" I said with a shrug.

"To be honest.. Nopony fully understands her... She's just Pinkie pie!" Celestia said with a nervous shrug.

"Although... She DOES make some of the best cake in equestria..." Celestia said with a nod, and a silly smile.

"Then there is Fluttershy... The only annoying thing with her is how silent and scared of things she is, I don't know anything about her besides that." I said as I rolled my eyes.

" I don't know much about her either... " Celestia admitted.

"Then there is your sister..." I said as I folded my arms again. Celestia had this look that said "oh here we go..."

"She speaks in this weird old English or something, she's REALLY loud, her wings actually make sense unlike Rainbow dash... She is super bipolar, I mean before that little incident we were on good terms, She seems to have a thing for Mac aswell..." I said as I rubbed my Chin.

"I think they look cute together!" Celestia said with a warm smile.

"You see a cute couple, I see a horrible case of pain suffering and torture..." I said bluntly making Celestia laugh.

"She can be quite rough at times... Alicorns are incredibly strong after all..." Celestia said as she Flexed her forehoof, it seems the fur covers most of the muscle because her and Luna don't look as buff as Big Mac... Maybe it had something to do with magic though... I wouldn't be surprised.

"Yeah... I learned that the hard way..." I said as I rubbed my face. Celestia looked at me curiously, before she sighed in annoyance, covered her face and shook her head.

"What did you do..."

"I told her that her cutie mark looked like an ink stain..." I said carefully. When I looked up Celestia was struggling to hold in a laugh. I just deadpanned and tried to change the subject.

"Anyways... about Mac... He seemed angry with you about something? " I said as I put my hands on my hips. Celestia just smiled smugly.

"Oh I just beat him in hoof wrestling at last year's ponyville fair..." She said with a smug grin.

"How bad?" I asked curiously, if Luna can drag him around like a ragdoll I can only imagine what Celestia can do. She had a nervous smile as she tapped her forehoofs together.

"Well I kind of... broke his foreleg...accidentally..." She said nervously. I just looked at her with a deadpan expression.

"Did he cry?"

"A little..."

"What did Luna say?"

"We didn't tell her... I don't think she would ever forgive me..."

"Was it worth it?"

"Yes"

"You should be ashamed of yourself..." I said as I shook my head in disappointment.

"He was so asking for it..." She said in her defense.

I kinda just stared blankly at her, then we both busted out laughing. I could only imagine his face after he lost! Well I guess it would be filled with pain and suffering... But it was still probably priceless!

Eventually we stopped laughing and I continued with my rant.

"Well the thing that bothers me about Luna the most, besides her almost having me executed, was the fact that she could move the fucking moon at will..." I said with deep disdain.

"Really?" Celestia said with a hint of sarcasm.

"Yeah she actually has the power...to fuck with the celestial bodies!" I said with a shake of my head.

"She has the powers to do WHAT to my body?" Celestia said, blushing and looking horrified.

"That's not what I ment... Humans call the moon, the sun, the stars and any other planets out there the celestial bodies!" I explained quickly.

"Oh..." Celestia said, her usual calm composure returning.

I then sighed and stared down at the floor.

"The thing that bothers me the most about this place is all these bullshit magical powers everyone has..." I said sadly.

"What's wrong with magic?" Celestia asked innocently.

"You don't understand... All the magic crap, Pegasi, Unicorns, even pegacorns..."

"Alicorns..." Celestia corrected.

"Whatever... Where I come from its all just a fiction, a dumb legend! some humans try to trick others into thinking they can really use magic, but its always just a lame trick or illusion." I said shaking my head.

" And now... There is living proof in front of me that it is real..." I said as I pointed to her. She just nodded and touched my shoulder again.

"I'm sorry that you feel this way Derrick... It must be hard for you being in a mysterious place alone..." She said with a look of understanding, I just sat there with my head down.

"I feel that maybe if you just give Twilight and her friends another chance...if you give equestria another chance, you won't feel as bad. Friendship can make a lot of things easier... Including you're time here in equestria..." She said as she removed her hoof and rubbed her chin in thought.

"Tell you what..." She said, as I raised my head curiously.

"Tomorrow after your procedure, what do you say about me showing you around canterlot? We could have lunch a nice lunch together, and perhaps forget about this incident." She said kindly.

"Oh sure...taking me to see more magical ponies will definitely make me feel better about... Seeing magical ponies..." I said sarcastically, a deadpan expression.

"Perhaps not... But it will at least get you used to seeing them because until we figure out how you got here... You may be here for a while." Celestia admitted with a nervous smile, making be groan.

"You might even make some new friends..." She added with a look I couldn't read.

"Also I fear for your health and safety... The magic I gave you almost killed you after all. So for the time being I will be keeping a close eye on you..." She said making me groan again.

"So that's the reason why I'm sleeping in the room next to yours..." I realized as I facepalmed.

"Indeed it is... Besides my sister and maybe Twilight sparkle, I have some of the most potent and powerful magic in Equestria... And it looks to me like our...contact... May have given some of it to you..." Celestia explained. I just stared at my glowing hands.

"Is it temporary?" I asked.

"This has never happened before... So I wouldn't know..." Celestia said with an honest shrug.

"Do you THINK its temporary?" I asked, just wanting a guess from her at this point.

"No..." Celestia said, making me sigh in defeat.

"Um...so... How do I turn it off like yours?" I asked as I snapped my fingers in an attempt to make it go away.

"You just have to relax Derrick... Magic is primarily controlled by thought, so if you focus on it too much it won't turn off..." Celestia said plainly. I tried to concentrate on other things but I couldn't... I mean my fucking hands were glowing gold! Celestia sighed in annoyance as she watched me attempting to suppress my magic.

"It's not working..." I muttered in frustration as I sighed in defeat.

Then Celestia leaned forward and Nuzzled me, what the actual fuck?

"I...you...what? You can't just..." I stammered as I sat there flushed and confused, Celestia just giggled at my reaction, and a second later the glow from my hands disappeared.

"See? Just relax..." Celestia said with a confident smile, I just backed up in confusion.

"Anyway you still haven't answered my question Derrick.." Celestia said, looking somewhat impatient.

"Yeah... We can hang out after my treatment or whatever..." I said with a simple wave of my hand.

"Wonderful! It's a date then!" She said cheerfully as she turned again.

"What?" I blurted. "You...me what? How the....huh? We just met..." I stammered again in confusion. When I looked up Celestia was staring at me with a deadpan expression.

"Are you done?" She asked.

"Yes?" I said with uncertainty.

"Good...I was joking about the date, it's just a quick tour of the city along with a nice friendly lunch...nothing more..." Celestia explained calmly, few you had me worried there...

"Oh.." I said simply.

"Now come on...the Princess needs her beauty sleep!" She called out to me and I quickly followed. We went up a flight of stairs before we got to what I assumed was Twilight's old room. There were a few guards around but they seemed uninterested.

"This is the room..." Celestia said as she gestured to it and she opened the door with her magic. It was pretty dark in here besides the light coming from the window. As we walked in Celestia zapped a few candles and they sparked to life. There were a lot of book shelf's around aswell as a large amount of scrolls and quills... Yep definitely Twilight's room.

There was a comfy looking bed in the corner and I immediately sprinted and jumped onto it with a loud plop. I looked back to Celestia who looked somewhat disturbed.

"OK..." She said backing up slightly. She then regained her composure and smiled.

"Well goodnight Derrick... Sleep well! See you tomorrow!" She said with a kind smile, I returned it with a wave.

"Good night, Princess..." I said casually as I watched her leave. I got a good look at her cutie mark as she walked out, it was a sun. Heh sunbutt... I'm definitely going to call her that if she ever makes me mad.

I relaxed and sat back in the bed and thought about my first day here. It could have been worse I suppose... I could be locked in a dungeon, accidentally killed, or worse... Forced into interspecies mating, good thing that's not for a few weeks though...

Then of course there is this magic bullshit... It's probably still going to be there when I wake up... Despite my deep disdain for the shit I'm actually kind of excited about using it... I wonder what cool stuff I can do now! And of course I got it from the best, the most Potent and powerful around! So the possibilities could be endless.

I'm actually kinda looking forward to tomorrow, I have magic to experiment with, I'll finally be rid of this golden bud crap and I have a date with Princess Celestia... Uh I mean...were going to hang out and eat lunch... Celestia seems like the chill type but I still feel like everything that can go wrong will go wrong tommorw.

My dirty mind and my drunken mind collaborated to bring an interesting observation to my attention. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna have nice plots... Whoa... OK... I'm just going to pretend I didn't just think that... Then again... They are kinda cute...Celestia even does that thing where she covers one eye with her hair, I always liked it when girls did that.....holy shit! What am I thinking! They're fucking ponies! Touching Princess Celestia's horn may have done more to me then just give me magic...

After that VERY disturbing thought I finally drifted off to sleep...

Author's Notes:

Notes: well that meeting went well... Barely... So that concludes Derrick's first day in equestria... And so far he kinda hates it... Let's just hope that Celestia can show our pal a good time! Anyways Act 1 ends whenever I get everything established so that means 2-3 more chapters.

Unfortunately. For me I am doing 2 stories with the same characters simultaneously so if any of you out there read BOTH my stories then they could get abit dull. So I'm going to try to make character different. Across both stories.

I originally planned to save meeting Celestia for the next chapter but that would mean I would have had to have 7000+ words of them sitting at twilight's and flying to canterlot, which I thought was unnecessary. So that's why this chapter is so long.

Please leave me you're reviews! Its all the input/reward I get, besides watching bar graphs raise slowly!