Act 3 part 3: Bear with us

As a precatuion, Before we went all the way to the Ursa's location, Luna and I stopped so she could heal me back to fighting strength. Everything was back to normal for the most part, but she warned me that while still usable, any muscles and bones that were previously damaged wouldn't be as strong until I got proper rest. We made our way toward the crash site, quickly realizing it was a lot further than we thought.

"Holy crap.... How far did you throw the damn thing?" I asked with annoyance. "I may have overdone it... a little bit..." Luna admitted with a smirk. "Yeah... Ya think?" I said with a frown. Luna just laughed at my expense, then her demeanor shifted. "So... Do you have a plan?" She asked urgently. I stopped walking immediately and smiled nervously "Uh...plan?...heh...." I stuttered. Luna stopped next to me and shook me with her hoofs "Do you have brain damage? Why would you charge into such a fight without at least a BASIC plan?!?" She scolded. "Um...I do have a plan for your information..." I said sheepishly. Luna stopped shaking me and put me down, regarding me with a skeptical look. "Well then... What is it?" She asked. I sat there silent for a moment before speaking up "I was just going to go over there and kill the shit out of it..." I stated simply. Luna blinked a few times "OK... And how did you plan to go about actually doing that?" She asked. "Um...magic?" I stated with a shrug, I'm pretty sure I would have been slapped if I told anyone back home that. Luna deadpanned "That is the worst plan I've ever heard..." She said with a facehoof.

"Grr.... OK what is YOUR plan then!?!" I demanded. " Above all avoid anymore damage to Ponyville than is nessecary. Keep the citizens away from danger by keeping the creature as far away from them as possible, while also forcing it's attention on me...or us. Then as far as combat, I've determined that my assailant is not as strong as me so simple brute force should be all that's required to defeat it..." She stated verbatim without even thinking hard. OK... I'm impressed... "Wow... That's surprisingly well thought out..." I muttered. "Hardly... I am still unsure what attacks do and do not work on the creature or if it can even be killed because it's body seems to be comprised of strange magic..." Luna admitted. "Don't you know what the thing is?" I questioned curiously, I figured a Princess should know what creatures lurk around her citizens. "I'm afraid not... I've never seen a creature like this before, it probably originated during my...Exile.." She said, I noticed her mood shift again. "Exile? What Exile?" I questioned. Luna started looking uncomfortable. "It's..a long story...I'll tell you one day..." She said with a hint of sadness, I guess it's a touchy subject.

Luna cleared her throat and closed her eyes, suddenly with a flash of light, 4 swords appeared In front of her. Each sword was glowing in Luna's powerful magic, The black aggressively designed blades shimmered in the darkness similar, to her flowing hair. She flipped the swords a few times, effortlessly willing them to her sides. They stood ready, two on each side and she smirked confidentiality. She looked over to me and I had a blank, unexcited expression.

"What?" She asked, wondering why I was basically frowning at her.

"Fucking show off..." I muttered, she started laughing at me.

"I'm simply getting ready for a fight, I rarely use these so I thought...why not?" She claimed. Nope I don't believe you.

"Let me borrow one..." I asked.

"Borrow one what?"

"One of those swords!" I said, gesturing to one of the four shimmering blades. She looked at her swords and back to me. Then she looked at me like I was insane.

"Why?!?"

"I basically broke my shoulder when I tried hitting that thing, I'm not physically tough enough to go head to head with it like that, but if your swords are able to cut into it then I could have a chance..." I explained. She blinked a few times but said nothing.

"Gimme a sword...." I repeated.

"No! These are mine! " Luna said defensively, as she brought them closer to her.

"What?!? Why not???" I blurted angrily.

"Because I said so!" She said with a frown. I snorted angrily and brought a hoof to my face. Sigh...That classic "I don't have a reason so fuck you response".

"Really? You're really doing this now?" I said.

"Yes! I do not allow anypony to touch my swords!" She stated.

"But remember Luna I'm technically not a po-"

"Grrr! If you're name is not LUNA then you're not using them!" She corrected. Damn... Heavily considering making up some Bullshit about my middle name being Luna, buuut she'd probably slit my throat so...

"Oh come on! You have FOUR....fucking....swords! can't you just give me ONE?" I snapped.

"Can't you just summon one with your chaos magic?" She shot back. Hmm... I could just do that... But I'm sure whatever I conjure up won't be as cool as hers, I'll never admit it though.

"Why waste my power magic on that, when you already have FOUR perfectly good swords right there?" I said with a facehoof. Luna growled with frustration and narrowed her eyes. I walked closer to her, within grabbing distance of the swords.

"Seriously... please? I really need one!" I pleaded. She tilted her mouth slightly and sighed.

"I doubt you would even be able to handle one..." She said with a huff.

"The hell are you talking about? It's just a sword! It's not Rocket Science!" I said with a scoff.

"Rocket... Science?"

"It's a human thing, ignore it... Its out of context" I said quickly.

"It's quite heavy..." She muttured as she looked down on me with a doubtful stare. What the hell? Does she think I'm completely helpless or something?!? Those things can't be more than a few pounds, otherwise they would be shity weapons! I bet she thinks this because of how small I look to her right now. So I transformed back into my human form and stared, hopefully this will persuade her...

"I can handle it..." I said sternly, now at her eye level. She stared me down for a few seconds before rolling her eyes with a sigh. She slowly moved one of the swords toward me, handle first I slowly reached out and gripped it, my hand getting this cold tingly feeling. "OK....this is...interesting..." I said as I studied the sword closely, Luna's magic pulsed through the blade and now through me. My heart rate spiked and I started to feel stronger, but I couldn't really focus on anything and I'm a bit dazed.

"Are you OK?"

"Uh..w..what? Yeah I'm...fine..."

"You look somewhat drowsy...."

"Oh... I feel kinda...silly..."

"Then you shouldn't be fig-"

"NO I'm AWAKE! LETS kick some ass!" I said triumphantly as I tried to run off with the sword but it didn't budge, almost making me fall to the ground.

"Oh... My apologies... I was still holding it" Luna said with a crude laugh. She released it from her magic. At first it felt almost weightless, but a second later the sword started to lose it's powerful energy and the damn thing dragged me to the ground with it's crushing weight. I very comically struggled to lift the damn thing like someone strong trying to lift Thor's hammer, this shit ain't budging.

"Why....won't....it...MOVE!" I said angrily as I tried multiple times to lift it. Luna shoke her head and smiled smugly. "I told you it was quite heavy....". I gave up and stood there frustrated. " What the hell? It was weightless a second ago! And what happened to that powerful energy?" I complained. "I let go of it..." Luna said plainly. "I know but what happened to the poooower???" I demanded, as I grunted a few times trying to pick the sword up again. This time I managed to lift it up a few inches but the thing was far to heavy. "I just told you... I let go of it.." Luna repeated, slightly annoyed. I frowned and tried using my magic to lift the sword. I surrounded it with my golden aura and prepared for the lift of a lifetime.

When I pulled the sword up again, I wasn't prepared for it to be weightless again, so when I pulled it up with my full strength it went flying 30 feet into the air, I yelped as it fell back down and stabbed into the ground, an inch away from where I was just standing. "Fucking sword!" I blurted out angrily. Luna snickered behind her hoof as she watched me fumble with it. The sword was now stuck vertically in the ground with the handle facing upward. "OK...alright.... Please explain why your sword can't decide how much mass it wants to have?" I said as I crossed my arms and frowned. After a bit of laughter Luna cleared her throat.

"Try channeling your magic into the blade..." She suggested. I cocked an eyebrow and scoffed, but I went over to the sword and gripped the handle. I guess simply lifting it isn't necessarily channeling magic into something. Do I even know how to do that? Wait a sec... I do! That time when I got my magic tested during that Golden Bud bullshit, I channeled my magic into that glass orb, I'll just try the same thing here. I took a deep breath and focused. A few seconds later the sword started to change. At first it looked like Luna sword again, with it's powerful magical glow and it's memorizing dark glow. But then the color began to change. It started to change color from dark blue like Luna's magic, to golden like Celestia's magic. "Whoa...OK..." I said as it continued to change aestheticly.

However watching this sword respond to my magic so differently made me think of something... OK I have a hunch. I let go of the sword and almost immediately the golden magic faded away and the sword went back to its dull boring state. "Conventional weapons can be enhanced by channeling magic into them..." Luna said behind me. I grabbed the sword again and it glowed to life, I snatched it out of the ground and stared at it. "I see now..." I said as I turned the blade in my hands easily. I tried to show off and flip the blade like Luna did, but I failed and almost dropped it again.

"Are you... Trained to use a sword?" Luna asked.

"Haha...nope " I admitted.

"What?!? Then why would you ask for a weapon you're not trained to use?!" She snapped as she angrily snatched it away from me.

"Hey I thought it was better then breaking my fists trying to punch the thing!" I muttered.

"You correctly identified these as swords, does the same weapon exist where you're from?"

"Yeah...."

"How come you're not trained to use them?" She asked with narrowed eyes. I chuckled lightly and answered.

"I'm not exactly a warrior where I come from Princess, even if I was, Human militaries wouldn't use such a... primitive weapon...." I said with a chuckle imagining modern day soldiers running around with huge ass anime swords, Luna snorted and rolled her eyes.

"You're not talking about those new 'crossbows' that the day Guard favors now?" She said with disdain. A laugh escaped from me before I could contain it, besides a few hunters maybe, I'm pretty sure nobody really uses crossbows either.... Except Daryl Dixon of course!

"No... Thats kinda... Primitive too..." I said with a nervous smile. Luna began to look even more skeptical. "Swords and Crossbows.... Primitive? What weapons do humans use then?" She asked. " Humans use.... GUNS! " I said as I rubbed my chin. "Guns?" Luna said, her head tilting curiously. "Trust me, they're way more advanced then any crossbow..." I said with a chuckle. "I kinda wish I had one right now..." I said as I let my shoulders hang. It took me a full 3 seconds to remember that I have Chaos magic. I focused on a spot on the ground in front of me, a moment later the spot began to glow intensely, making Luna shield her eyes. After the light faded, there was a black metal object on the ground.

"Oh fuck yes!" I uttered excitedly as I snatched the thing off the ground. It weighed about 2-3 pounds, so it was pretty light. I looked over to Luna and she looked unimpressed. "It's... Tiny...." Luna said as she eyed it closely. She tried looking down the barrel and my heart jumped, I quickly snatched it away from her. "What the hell are you doing! This thing is dangerous!" I quipped. Luna just busted out laughing. "I doubt that miniscule device could even harm a fly!" She said as she waved it off like it was nothing. As she kept laughing I started to get a little irritated, so I ignored her obnoxious laughter and focused on the gun. It was an all black MP7A1 with an extended magazine, so you know a typical badass SMG...or PDW...fuck it it's cool and shit. I carefully took the safety off and cocked the gun. I pointed the thing at the ground a few feet away and braced myself. I'll fire off one shot to see if it works properly.

*click*

With a satisfying pull of the trigger the gun erupted to life with a loud bang and a bright flash, firing a single round into the ground. I was expecting way more recoil then that, I Barley even budged! Maybe it's because of my increased strength, heh...i should try one hand next time. Luna yelped and covered her ears "Heavens!" She blurted in shock. I chuckled at the idea of someone loud like Luna complaing about noise. "Haha! I'm in love!" I said as I kissed the weapon. Luna frowned at me and glared at the gun " It's still tiny..." She teased. As much as I would like to disagree, she's right! The MP7 is kind of a small gun and that Ursa is fucking huge! I don't think this will be enough sadly. I might be better off with my lasers or that sword. Then again... There ARE bigger guns out there...

Before I could get any kind of planning in I felt that familer shaking of the ground, Luna and I looked up to see the Ursa barreling at us full speed. It jumped into the air above us and was about to body slam us both 6 feet under, but we dove out of the way. It quickly stood up and glared death at us. Luna's swords came to life around her and she stood ready, while I switched my gun to full auto. We sat there glaring death at each other until the bear finally decided to act. It charged forward at us on all fours, I pulled the trigger and opened fire. The bullets bounced and tinged off of it and for the most part it was unfazed, until I tightened up and aimed at the head. It's head jerked back from the spray making the bear trip over itself and crash toward us, forcing Luna and I to evade again. The bear sat there collapsed in a heap and pawed at it's muzzle roaring in pain. Holy shit that did ALOT more then I thought it would! But... It's still very much alive.

I was about to light the thing up again but my gun responded with a hollow click.

Out of bullets

Fuck! I forgot to conjure extra mags! Luna just watched as I despritly conjured up another magazine. I tossed the empty one aside and replaced it with the new one and cocked the gun with a satisfying metallic click. The bear was starting to stand up, it gritted its teeth and stood on all 4. My gun sparked to life once again as I rained more hell onto it's face, making it stumble back again. In an instant I was out of ammo again, fuck this thing fires fast! "That weapon may be quite impressive but its not working!" Luna said as she gestured to the bear again. It was definitely in pain, but it was still standing. "This thing isn't designed to take down anything bigger than another Human..." I muttered as I reloaded again. "I think its my turn..." Luna said as she stepped in front of me. I was considering tossing the gun aside and just using lasers in my Unicorn form, but I have a...small hunch about something, and so far that's been a good thing.

Luna smirked confidentiality before zipping forward with her sword in tow. The bear reacted then began to swipe at her. She doged it's attacks with ease and with a battle cry she sored into the air above the Ursa. As she fell, she pointed her swords downward. The bear looked up and roared defiantly, but before it could do anything else Luna slammed into it knocking it flat on it's ass, then she jammed her swords into the Ursa's neck. Before either of us celebrated, we began to quickly realize this thing has a habit of not fucking dying. Before Luna could retrieve her swords it grabbed her and slung her into the nearest building at breakneck speed. Are you fucking serious? Stabbing it in the neck with 4 swords did absolutely NOTHING? Fuck this bear!

The Ursa pulled the swords out of it's neck and looked at me. Is... Is that...a smile? "Oh sh-" was all I uttered before Luna's swords were thrown at me like fucking daggers. I dove to the side and narrowly avoided them. I looked at the spot where I just was and the 3 swords were stuck into the ground. Wait a second... There were four swords not thre- Fuck! The fourth sword came at me like a rocket and ended up skimming my left arm painfully. Still holding the gun I clutched it painfully as I glared up at the Ursa. It looked like it was... Laughing??? Is this thing taunting me? What the hell? FUCK YOU! Your going to pay for cutting my only hoodie!

I noticed that Luna was still nowhere to be seen, she must still be in that building! I need to get over there. I sucked up my pain and went into a full sprint toward the building that Luna was thrown into, it was a few hundred feet away at least, but guess who's big ass came lumbering after me again? I peeked behind me and the beast was rapidly closing in. I pointed the gun at the bear with one hand and opened fire as I ran. Like before I aimed at the head and scored a couple hits making it slow it's stride long enough for me to get to the house. Thankfully I could see Luna stepping out of the ruined house...unharmed? I ran to her side and hunched over to catch my breath.

"Well I wasn't quite expecting that..." She said looking embarrassed. I quickly studied her body and noticed she wasn't hurt... Like at all... Not a fucking scratch!

"Fucking alicorns..." I muttered as buried my head into my free hand. I'm pretty sure if that thing threw ME into the building that hard, I would have suddenly come down with a sudden case of snapped spinal cord with death as an immediate symptom, but Luna just gets up like it was nothing. Not gonna lie... Slightly turned on by this...uh I mean... Its slightly impressive! Yep exactly what I ment!

"What?" Luna asked, apprantly I was staring.

"Forget it. We need a plan, nothing we've done so far is really hurting it." I said with a grunt as I studied my gun again, I'm going to try testing that hunch soon.

"We need to focus our attacks on the creature's head, that's the only area that's yeilded results..." She said wiping dust off herself. She looked at me and noticed I was hurt "Again Derrick?" She said as she quickly healed me." Hey I'm not invincible like you and your sister... " I said with a shrug. "My sister and I aren't invincible..." Luna said with a sad expression. "Crap! here it comes!" I interrupted, as the Ursa came charging at us again, this thing is awfully predictable... Too bad it resists all of our attacks. I decided that now was a good time to play that hunch! Let's see... Luna said that you can channel magic into Weapons right? Well let's see what happens to my MP7! I channeled my magic into the gun, it began to glow golden at the seams and had a powerful aura around it. I used significantly more magic then I did with the sword so this shit better work.

I pulled the trigger and a near instantaneous beam of golden light cast out of the barrel and hit the Ursa square in it's chest. The beam seemed to explode on contact because there was a second bang and the Ursa was sent flying into a building. Holy shit... That was 1 bullet...1 fucking bullet did that? "Eat shit and die!" I yelled as I proceeded to light the whole building up. The constant firing kicked up a massive dust cloud that got thicker with each round I fired. I noticed that I fired way more than 40 rounds, and the gun was still going, Meaning it doesn't require physical ammunition, just Magic.... A lot of magic...

I ended up using a lot more then I probably should have, but if the Ursa dies then it will all be worth it. I started to feel drained and tired which was my cue to stop firing. All that was left was an enormous dust cloud. I turned to Luna and her mind was blown, with a *poink* her wings sprung out and stayed erect, she was basically doing what Celestia did when I turned into that alicorn. I really need to ask them what it means when they're wings stay open like that. "I..I believe you v..vanquished the c...creature..." Luna stuttered. Wait... Since when does Luna stutter like that? OK....

"Nope. I've seen way too many movies where the smoke fades and the thing is still alive..." I said with a frown, I swear this bitch is still alive I just know it. "Movies?" Luna questioned. "Forget it. Just wait..." I said as I extended the gun's stock and shouldered it. I walked toward the smoke cloud, I'm going to pop that thing right in the head as soon as the smoke clears. I have to make sure I don't use too much magic or I might pass out or something. Alright I don't want to get too close to the smoke either, or it might snatch me through it or something. Before either of that could happen I noticed a faint glow coming from within the smoke. I immediately stopped in my tracks. What the hell? "Derrick..." Luna said behind me cautiously. Suddenly a large beam erupted from the smoke and struck me. The entire front of my body was in intense pain as it instantly melted the gun in my hands and threw me back toward Luna. Then as if that wasn't enough the force of the beam made me slam into Luna and we both went flying backward into a building. My 5 senses refused to work for about 10 seconds, which probably wasn't a good thing. Slamming into Luna like that hurt almost as much as the beam that knocked me into her in the first place. I swear to god Alicorns are living descendants of the original fucking Brick wall! Or they're fucking bones are made of adamantium like wolverine!

I was laying on top of Princess Luna who looked just as dazed as me. I looked to my hand and struggled to move my fingers, that gun melting in my hand almost burnt it off completely, I glanced sadly at the destroyed gun, I was about to kill this thing with it! Im too drained right now to conjure up another one. Welp back to lasers I guess... I switched back into my Unicorn form and tried to get up but to no avail, Jesus.... I need to stop getting hit... I'm simply not built for this bullshit...Yet...

I quickly realized the position Luna and i were in, she was flat on her back with her legs spread out, and my crippled form was laying on her belly. I cringed and rolled off her. She was to busy sweating and painting with that same look from before, to notice that I moved. If Luna didn't cushion my fall, I would likely had that case of "serious spine snapping". "Hey Princess... You OK?" I asked worriedly. She vigorously shook her head and got out of that weird trance she was in. "Oh.. Im fine, the slight dizziness will pass... I think..." She said as she immediately got up. "Come let us finish this creature..." She said with a serious expression. I started to chuckle slowly "Well... I would totally join you in the ass kicking, but I can't even move right now..." I said. Luna's determination faltered for a moment.

"I'm fed up with this creature throwing us around!" She snapped angrily. She gritted her teeth and started to power up. She was getting pissed... Like super pissed...no this is what I like to call "epic rage". The Ursa tried reaching into the building, pushing past furniture and personal belongings to reach us, but Luna charged the creature at a speed I couldn't follow. Holy shit! The power emanating from her right now is massive! Was she holding back? It's right around Celestia's right now! I can only imagine how strong Celestia is when powered up!

She tackled the thing so hard that it went flying back toward the outskirts. "Holy fuck!" I blurted out loud. The pain finally premmitted me to stand, it turned out I'm not as hurt as when Luna saved me, nothing is broken, however I'm still limping for some reason, I can tell all of you that it's not a fun experience. I limped out of the house and into the street, I could see Luna standing on the ground definitely as the now recovered Ursa opened it's mouth wide. A light formed deep in it's mouth, hey that looks like...

"Luna look out!" I yelled, But it was too late. The Ursa's Beam streamed forward and struck Luna. I cringed as I feared the worse, dreading seeing her crippled body on the floor... Wait what? Luna hadn't budge an inch, the Ursa's Laser washed over her but... Did nothing. The Ursa stopped firing and looked somewhat deaprate...afraid of her as she slowly walked to it. It backed away, it's face frozon in genuine fear, but then it started to look angry, like it suddenly built up confidence again. It opened it's mouth and charged once more, Luna was right below it at this point. When it fired down on her, she jumped into the air and hit it with a powerful uppercut, immediately snapping it's jaw shut, and knocking it's head back with a loud *Crack*. "Shut your mouth you vile creature!" Luna yelled at it as she proceeded to beat the living shit out of it. Hey... I could totally do that... I would just end up with two broken arms, or hooves . I quickly realized that whatever injuries I get in my varuios forms carry over to the next one, so if I break my arm as a human then my leg will be broken as a pony. Fortunately I didn't break anything as far as I could tell, but I couldn't do much besides clutch my wounds and watch Luna sling that poor thing around like a ragdoll. This is honestly kind of hot....er... I mean....she's kind of hot...no! I mean I'm feeling kind of hot right now, yeah that's it!

"Derrick!" Called a familer voice behind me. I turned to see Twilight and her friends rushing up to me worriedly. They all ran up and grabbed me in a tight embrace. "We were so worried about you!" Twilight said. "Owowow! Let go!" I yelped in pain. They all literally dropped me to the floor. "Grr...you didn't have to let go like that..." I grumbled.
"My Celestia... You're hurt badly!" Rarity blurted with a horrified look. "Oh... I'm good... It's part of the costume..." I said with a fake laugh as a drop of blood rolled down from my bleeding forehead, awesome timing blood. Twilight immediately started to heal me as the other girls struggled to contain they're concern. "What happened?" Applejack asked.

"These two goofy kids thought it was a good idea to lead that thing to town so that they're great and Power wizard could fight it or something..." I explained. "That Great and Powerful Wizard wouldn't happen to be Trixie... Would it?" Twilight guessed. "Yep, she just ran off leaving me to fight the thing." I said with a frown. "You fought an Ursa Major... ALONE?!?" Twilight blurted. "Heh...yeah... I told Dash to go get you or one of the Princesses, I figured I could hold it off until one of them arrived... That didn't go well I said With a shake of my head. " Speaking of Dash... Where is she?" I wondered. "We haven't seen Dashie since she went looking for you! It was weird because Princess Luna left at the same time..." Pinkie answered with her energetic self. That's weird... They BOTH went to look for me? That means Dash is probably getting Celestia right now, too bad the Ursa is basically dead.

"Heh... Princess Luna is over there wiping the floor with that Ursa Major.." I said with a smirk as I pointed to her on the outskirts. Everyone looked and gasped, Luna threw the Ursa into the air again and it landed a few feet in front of us. The thing barley had one eye open and it's blue body seemed to fade in and out. It layed flat on it's belly with it's head facing us.

"Holy molley!" Applejack said.

"Oh my..." Rarity said with horror.

"Cool!" Pinkie said with a wide smile.

Fluttershy said nothing, she just turned pale, and Twilight was looking skeptical, she looked like she was trying to remember something. The bear's jaws suddenly gapped open and and began charging that beam again. "Buck! Get Down!" I yelled. Before any of us could react, Luna came out of knowhere and slammed on top of the bears muzzle, snapping it's mouth shut and burrying it's muzzle into the ground, leaving that star on it's forehead completely open. Luna started to charge a laser attack but Twilight suddenly yelped. "What?" I asked. "That's... Not an Ursa major... This is an Ursa Minor!" She said, with growing fear. "Princess Luna please stop!" She blurted, but it was too late. Luna fired the beam straight into the star on it's forehead. The glow in the bear's eyes instantly faded, and it's body began to slowly fade away until there was nothing left but a small hole where Luna had jammed the thing's face into the floor.

"Good riddance!" Luna said with a smirk as she walked over to us. This time all I could see on her were a few minor bruises, but she maintained her indestructibility. "Nonono! This is BAD!" Twilight said as she started having a mental breakdown. "What? Why? Luna just wiped the floor with that thing! The town is saved!" I said, I cocked an eyebrow at her. "You don't understand! Ponyville is doomed!" She yelled as she began to shiver. "Explain yourself Twilight sparkle!" Luna snapped. "Yeah Twilight what do you mean Ponyville is doomed?" Applejack asked. All eyes were on her as she explained sheepishly.

"The creature you just killed was NOT an Ursa major!" She stated. Everyone looked at each other in confusion as she continued "That was only an Ursa Minor, a young Ursa. a...Baby..." Twilight said grimly. Fluttershy yelped again as she began to look teary eyed, being an animal lover and all that probably cut deep. So Luna just killed a baby... So what?!? The thing almost killed a bunch of innocent citizens! Hell it almost killed ME! What? is PETA going to sue us or something?!? Or whatever the pony equivalent is? "OK it was a baby...and it's dead now, what's your point?" I demanded. "The point is that bear has a MOTHER, and she's going to be VERY upset with us!" She said shakingly.

LOL WAT?

We all sat in silence, processeing what Twilight just said. This big ass bear that nearly killed me... TWICE was a baby... A fucking child!?! You know what that means? Momma has to be at least twice this thing's size! before I could finish my thoughts on how fucked we were, I was assaulted with a ear splitting sound that only served to tell me how fucked we were. There was a roar so loud, that we all covered our ears and cringed painfully. When the sound stopped we all looked toward a steady stomping sound coming from the other side of town. We slowly turned to see the mother of all fucking mystical bears stomping toward Ponyville. It was all the way on the other side of town but it was so big we could see it clearly from here. It was purple and definitely bigger than the minor, infact I swear this thing is comparable to one of those monsters from Pacific rim, or Godzilla. Yep that's about right... Yep... Just fucking doomed...

"Well it was nice knowing you girls... " I said as I lowered my head grimly. "No! This creature will not harm ANYPONY!" Luna yelled as her eyes glowed white and her power surged again. Without another word she charged off toward the major leaving us all behind. "That thing is all the way across town!" Rarity said. "Well then I better start running..." I muttered as I took off toward the Major. "Dawn wait!" Twilight called out but it was already too late, I'd slipped away behind a building just in time. There is no damn way I could make it in time to save anyone if I have to run across the whole town, I'd be too tired too stand after a run like that, let alone fighting. So I took this opportunity to quickly switch to my Pegasus form to save time. I flew low over the buildings so I wouldn't be spotted by anyone. After a minute of flying I spotted Luna on the ground looking up at the Major. I landed behind a nearby building and turned back into Dawn.

This must have been where everyone was evecuated to, because there are a SHIT LOAD of ponies here. Now they were forced to retreat again in the opposite direction. So far besides being loud the major seemed to be searching for something. It ignored the fleeing Citizens as it loudly sniffed around. I ran up to Luna and looked up at the thing, my ears instantly drooped and I started to shiver, you know what? I think I might die... Luna somehow held her determined glare despite essentially facing Godzilla directly. Holy shit... She's fucking fearless! I could never be that brave! Wait a sec... I ran out here to fight it too... Well I guess either my balls quadrupled in size, or I'm really fucking stupid...or both.

The Major kept sniffing until it paused, it started to lower it's nose near Luna. It sniffed a few more times before growling. It's eyes locked with Luna's and it lowered it's head to face her. I noticed Luna's hard stare falter for just a moment but it remained strong. It took one more wiff before snarling angrily. Why the fuck is it sniffing her? Realization hit me like a brick wall..oh I mean... realization hit me like an Alicorn. The smell of the minor must be all over Luna, and somehow that thing knows...it knows Luna killed it's baby.

"Make a move you repulsive abomination!" Luna spat. That was the thing's cue to strike. Let me just say... It was a fucking genius idea to fight the mother of something that almost killed me effortlessly...

...

Inside the Royal castle, Princess Celestia was laying back on her bed reflecting... Normally she would have long been asleep, but right now she simply couldn't. There were too many things nagging at her mind. Now when you're the Co-leader of a country, they'll always be things nagging at your mind... Lots of politics... Economic issues... public relations... ETC. But those were pretty low on the list at the moment. She wasn't thinking about snooty nobles or spreedsheets, she was thinking about the Human that changed her life less than a week ago.

Her first impression of him was one of wonder, he was a literal living legend after all. But not a few moments after they met that impression quickly changed. Celestia knew that her horn was... Quite long... After all it wasn't the first time she's been told that, nore was it the first time somepony accidentally touched it. She was well aware of the effects that touching horns entails, All the subconscious decisions that you end up making to bring each other closer and what not. But in the past she was simply able to resist the urges until they faded. She was prepared to do the same this time around as well, she thought DJ was kind of... cute, but she wasn't looking for a soulmate or anything. But ever since that day she spent with him the urges became stronger, the attraction more legitimate.

While she still struggles to truly accept it, she does like him. She sometimes catches herself thinking about him, mostly innocent thoughts besides a few occasions where she had... A few rouge 'Naughty fantasies'. She mostly thought about what he's doing, where he is, WHO HE'S WITH. That was also another thing she was worried about... The jealousy she would feel sometimes. Princess Celestia was far from the jealous type, after all... When you're one of the most Intelligent, Beautiful, Powerful, Rich and Adored mares in Equestria, there isn't really anypony you could be jealous of... Except Princess Luna of course...

Her sister had the brains, the looks, and the money too match, Despite her not being as strong or as famed. Nevertheless she was like herself 'a good catch' as some stallions tend to put it. She was also the only other mare to touch horns with DJ. She was going through a similar situation as her, subconscious decisions, rouge thoughts and so on. She loved her little sister to death, it hurt her so, to be forced to banish her to the Moon, and it brought her great joy to see her return 1000 years later. Despite her love for her sister, when she saw her with Derrick... she was absolutely livid! She even considered banishing her again on the spot. This kind of anger... This kind of hate... Was completely uncharacteristic and it scared her. Thankfully she has the self control to keep herself from banishing her sister because of a fit of jealousy. She thought it was immature to fret about such things.

Unfortunately... recent actions by her sister have tried her self control. She still couldn't grip the fact that her sister stole Derrick's first kiss with a mare away from her. 'How dare she?!?' She kept thinking to herself. She had to constantly remind herself that Derrick probably only did it because he was drunk, especially judging from his reaction to finding out.

They had an argument about the issue not too long ago and after almost an hour of debating they agreed to try and give each other a fair chance. They also agreed to avoid smothering him, because they already know how Derrick is uncomfortable with the idea of relationships with ponies, they both agreed it was cute how he would get nervous and choke up when he's around girls sometimes. She thought that with time that he will most likely become comfortable with the idea, she could feel the eternal debate that he was having about the very subject. He may deny it now but she's caught him peeking a few times, and he blushes alot too, she just pretended not to notice. It was now just a waiting game, either she or her sister win his heart the normal way, or the season comes around and they have to compete with all of Equestria.

Celestia didn't like the fact that this occupied her thoughts so often, normally it was easy for her to shut out certain issues( like Blue Blood's constant whining). She should really get to sleep she thought, she needs to get some rest so she can raise the morning sun. She got into a more comfortable position and closed her eyes.

A minute or two later she was about to sucomb to tiredness, but a loud knock came on the door. Celestia shot up in her bed and growled. She was a kind and lenient pony most of the time, that had few rules. But whoever was knocking at the door right now just broke one of her most important ones: Don't disturb her after her shift!

"Um...Princess Celestia? The element of Loyalty is requesting a word with you..." A young guard said. "Can it wait until Tomorrow? I'm quite TIRED..." Celestia replied dryly with irritation. " She says it's important..." The guard said. " Very well, I'll be a moment..." She said as she quickly gathered herself. With a flash of her horn, she was instantly in her Royal Regalia. She usually preferred to not take the magic shortcut to things, but she wanted to deal with the matter and go to sleep as soon as possible. She flung the door open and stepped out (Keep in mind how big the doors to her Chambers are) startling the guard waiting on the other side. Celestia looked upon the guard with impatience. "Where?" Was all she said. "Oh uh...she's waiting in the thr-" the guard was interrupted by a Rainbow haired mare zipping around the corner.

"There you are I couldn't wait in the throne room!" Dash said as she ran up to the Princess and did a quick bow. "What 'important' matter brings you to my castle at 12:00 pm?" Celestia asked with a cocked brow. Rainbow Dash appeared out of breath, her pupils were dialated and she was sweating profusely. Despite her desperation Celestia thought the issue was trivial, and she was just over reacting about something like that time the wonderbolts canceled their air show because of a wing injury. Dash waited a few moments so she could catch her breath. Celestia began to tap her hoof impatiently, a quality only shown when she's tired or grumpy.

"PONYVILLE IS UNDER ATTACK!!!" She blurted. The guard's ears drooped and Celestia's eyes widened. "By whom?" Celestia asked quickly. She immediately feared the worst. Did the Dragons form an alliance of some sort and strike? Are the Griffons ignoring or forgetting peace treatys again? "It's this huge bear thing!" Rainbow said. Celestia tilted her head slightly. "Huge bear thing? What do you..." She paused and tensed up when she realized what she was describing. "Please tell me its not an Ursa..." Celestia pleaded. "Yeah! It was an URSA MAJOR that's what Dawn said it was..." Rainbow confirmed. Celestia's blood began to run cold, an Ursa major? Attacking Ponyville? If that's really the case there might be nothing left... "Wait... Where is Derr- Dawning Jade???" She demanded. "He's trying to hold the thing off, he told me to get you!" Rainbow explained.

Celestia heart essentially stopped at that moment. Derrick is fighting an Ursa Major? He may posses powerful magic, but he simply doesn't have the training or control to utilize it properly! He'll be SLAUGHTERED! "On my way here I told Princess Luna about it so she's probably fighting it too..." Rainbow added. That relieved Celestia somewhat but Ponyville is still in grave danger. Celestia knew Luna was powerful, but handling an Ursa Major is beyond her, especially since the creature popped up during her exile, she would have no knowledge of it.

Celestia looked to the guard and he snapped to attention. "Inform the Captain immediately, tell him to bring rescue and relief teams, as well as his top Unicorns squads!" She snapped. "Yes your Highness! Right away!" The guard said with a salute as he bolted away. "Miss Dash come with me..." Celestia ordered as she galloped Down the hall at full speed with determination on her face. Dash had to fly just to keep up with her. "We have a bear to silence..." Celestia said coldy as the two went out of a nearby entrance and took to the air."Here we come...uh.. Ursa thingie!" Dash said confidently.

...

I think we may really be in trouble here... This thing is determined to kill Luna! She flew around the Ursa's head firing lasers, trying to hit the star on it's forehead. But the Ursa strategically covered it with it's paw, and swiped at her with the other. I in the mean time, used this opportunity to charge up a beam attack. Luna bobbed and weaved around the Ursa's head, further infuriating it. However I could tell she couldn't keep this up forever, I noticed her exhaustion from the strain, she just got done beating the shit out of the minor after all, so she had to be slowing down. As if the Ursa could hear my fucking thoughts, one of it's swipes finally hit home. With a loud crack and a painful scream she was knocked into the ground nearby. The fact that she screamed alarms me, did this thing actually manage to hurt an Alicorn?

To my horror my suspicions were confirmed when I saw her struggle to stand and I noticed her left wing was bent the wrong way. The Ursa let out a loud snort as it gazed down on Luna. I've been charging this attack for two minutes now, so I think that's adiqute charge time for epic laser rape don't you think? I quickly aimed at the Ursa head and released the attack. A gigantic devastating beam of golden energy shot out toward it. The major saw it and tried to move, but despite its evasion attempt, it ended up hitting it square in it's chest. The beam surprisingly cut right through it, leaving a decent hole in the chest area where I could see the stary night sky. The bear choked loudly and clutched the wound, slowly falling backwards with so much force it knocked Luna and I off our hooves. After the dust settled I stood up and observed the damage. It's eyes were still wide open but they're intense glow faded, and it's limbs twitched ever so slightly. I could see that the hole in it's chest was already regenerating, but at a slow rate.

I ran up to Luna who was still collapsed on the ground. "Arg.... I'm quite impressed... First that tiny human weapon knocked the minor off it's feet.... and now this...y...you have a lot of hidden power Derrick..." Luna said with the best smile she could muster considering the pain. "Yeah well thanks... To bad I missed..." I said with a weak chuckle. "That things already regenerating... It's going to be back with a vengeance soon..." I said grimly. "Haha... well it is simple for you now... Don't miss..." Luna said with a giggle, enturrupted by sharp pain. " Gonna have to get you somewhere safe first... That thing is after you.... Can you move? " I asked. Luna grunted painfully but managed to stand. I'm not a fucking doctor or a veterinarian, but her wing is broken, and her left foreleg might be too. She tried to take a step but she almost collapsed to the ground, so I lifted her with my magic. "I'll take that as a no..." I muttured. "Hurry... Agh.... The creature is breathing again..." Luna said as she pointed to the Ursa, whos chest rose and fell ever so slightly. "Hang on!" I said as I began to run down the street full speed, but I had to stop immediately because of what was in it.

Shit.

All the Towns people were slowly streaming into it, blocking it off completely. What the hell are they doing? That bear is about to come back and they'll all be slaughtered! They probably think the thing is dead or something. I heard them whispering among themselves.

"Wow did you see that beam?"

"Yeah! It blasted right through that bear!"

"I think that came from the new guy!"

"The new guy? You mean Princess Celestia's new student?"

"Yeah him! The Hottie!"

"Woo! Good job new guy!"

"Yeah! That was phenomenal Mr. Jade!"

"I love you!"

"Wait a second I just saw Princess Luna fighting the creature a minute ago!"

"No man you've got it wrong bro! She's injured!"

"Oh my I hope she's alright!"

"Naw bro thiers no way Princess Luna got injured, I bet he's just holding her to be nice..."

"Wow he's such a Gentlecolt..."

"Well ah am just glad that big critter is dead..."

"I know right! " I wonder what the new guy is going to say?"

"What? Like a heroic speech or something?"

"Yeah! That would be totally wicked... Let's listen..."

...

"WHAT THE BUCK ARE YOU DOING!!! GET YOUR PLOTS IN GEAR AND RUN YOU BUCKING RETARDS!!!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

"Did he.....did he just call us retards?

"Oh my... Such foul language... I like it..."

"Wow he's so hot when he's mad..."

"Hey! Listen to me! It's not safe, that thing is still alive! You have to get away!" I snapped at the crowd. The crowd just sat and stared at me blanky, the guys with they're deadpan faces, and the plentiful girls with they're lustful stares and slobbering. "Do as he commands citizens!" Luna said, quickly getting the attention. The citizens gasped, they must have realized how dangerous it was when they saw I was carrying an injured Alicorn and began to sprint in the opposite direction again. Two older looking Unicorn ponies emerged from the crowd and ran up to me. "We can take you somewhere safe your highness!" One of them offered. I looked at Luna for confirmation, I'm not going to hand her over to some random dudes unless she's OK with it. Luna nodded and I gently set her down, only for her to be raised again by one of the ponies. "You must be careful Dawning Jade..." Luna started. "Yeah yeah don't die, I got it..." I said with a wink. Luna smiled in return as the crowd of ponies left once again, carrying their injured Princess away from danger.

I turned and started to jog back toward the Ursa. It still wasent up, but I could see that it's nearly regenerated completely. "Well time to go die..." I joked to myself. Then my heart stopped when I saw something. Those 3 little girls from ealier were standing maybe 50 feet from the Ursa's head, observing it curiously. Shitshitshit! Why are those kids there!?! I ran at them as fast as I could.

"Wow... That Dawning jade Guy sure did a number on this thing..." Applebloom said."Yeah! The whole town must have saw that beam he used on it!" Sweetie bell said "I can't believe he beat a..." Scootaloo paused when she couldn't remember what it was called. "Ursa major?" Sweetie bell finished for her. "Yeah...what she just said..." Scootaloo said with a giggle."I wonder if there is a cutie mark for defeating Ursa Majors..." Applebloom pondered. "Maybe... I'm just glad we were in that building so we could see the fight!" Scootaloo said. "Yeah unlike those weirdos Snips and snails, they were to scared to watch with us..." Sweetie said.

"RUN AWAY!!!" I screamed at them, they're heads darted in my direction. "Hey...isn't that Dawning Jade?" Scootaloo questioned. "Yeah it is...he's telling us to...run away?" Sweetie bell said. "That thing's still alive!" I said as I got closer. The girl's eyes widened and their ears drooped as the Ursa finally began to stir up again. It started to rise up on it's feet again as I got to the girls. "Come On! You have to run!" I said as I nudged them, without a word they started to gallop away. Fuck! They'll never get away in time! I have to grab them, I run faster anyways! I thought as I snatched them all up with my magic. The Ursa was now towering over us once again. Uh oh... It had it's mouth open... It going to vaporize us! Dammit! I have to get away! These kids... They're families will morn them... No! That's not happening! I have to save them!

I started to feel a large power, rapidly getting closer, the power was felt very familiar, but I can't worry about that now, the Ursa is firing it's laser! The gigantic blue beam coming from it's mouth looked a lot like one of those Ki attacks from Dragon ball Z. It reached out and struck the ground immediately behind me, it appears that the Ursa missed me by an inch. But unfortunately the explosion following the beam caught me. The force and pressure from the explosion hit me so hard that I ended up losing my magical grip on the girls and we were all thrown high into the air. I was thrown at a much higher speed then the girls because of proximity, a speed that is most likely fatal. I watched the girls as they tumbled through the air slowly, screaming loudly and absolutely terrified, hopefully they all survive this...

Suddenly I saw the girls get snatched out of the air by a Rainbow bullet. "What the fu-" I started to say, I stopped once I felt my speed and momentum vanish. I could feel that same familiar colossal power right on top of me. There were two forelegs wrapped around me that had golden slippers on. My back was also against some really soft fur I looked up to see Princess Celestia's Angel like figure smiling warmly at me. I was completely speechless, mostly because I was baffled that I didn't turn into jelly after running into her. I glanced over to where the girls just were and I saw Rainbow dash wearing a confident smirk and Holding all three girls, two on her forelegs and 1 on her head. I sighed with relief as we all gently floated to the ground. Rainbow took off with the girls toward the evacuating ponies, leaving Celestia and I on the ground.

She set me down gently and I proceeded to get hipnotized by those magneta orbs that are her eyes...uh I mean... I looked at her. " I swear...I'm so fucking done getting saved by girls... " I said bluntly with a facehoof. At first Celestia frowned "This is the third godamn time within the last 20 minutes..." I added. Celestia's frown faltered slightly but it remained. " Just let me die next time unless I've saved YOU at least once...OK?" I said. That was enough to set Celestia off and she busted out laughing. "You think I'm joking? You saved me from Getting executed, then you taught me how to fly... Then procedded to save me from falling to death, then you sealed away the chaos magic corrupting me, then you saved me from Rainbow dash..." I listed. Celestia began to blush lightly as I continued. "And now this...you saved me from becoming a pancake... You've done a lot for me..." I said as I got closer to her. "Thank you..." I whispered. I nuzzled her cheek affectionately. Celestia returned the nuzzle for about 0.799999 seconds before I realized what I was doing and jumped away.

OK... I've crossed the fucking line... What the fuck am I doing?!? I just Nuzzled the shit out of her cheek! WHHHHY?????? I mean... I don't even nuzzle people what the hell!?! OK... Definitely need to talk to someone about this shit, I swear I'm cursed or something. Celestia let out one of those little girl giggles and I just buried my face into my hoofs. "I can't even...ugh!" I said in frustration. " No need to thank me Derrick... I'm here for you..." She said with a warm smile. Her saying that made me feel... Weird... Not necessarily in the good way... I think... I don't know... My emotions are all over the fucking place right now. "So what's that all about?" Celestia asked, gesturing to my armor trying to change the subject as if she could feel my unease. "Oh this... It's nothing... I caved and made this for the nightmare night or whatever" I said waving it off. Celestia walked over to me and felt the armor. "You did an amazing job! I like how you made it look battle tested by adding this!" She commented as she looked at the chest plate. "Heh...oh...that uh... scratch" I said with nervous laughter. "I think you overdid it somewhat..." She said. "Maybe... I didn't exactly have control over the Ursa minor ripping into my chest..." I said with a chuckle. Celestia started to look wide eyed as she realized that any holes, marks or scratches were actually inflected on me. "Yeah that thing kinda almost killed me... until your sister killed the shit out of it..." I said with a chuckle. "That would explain some things... Wait where is she?" Celestia said as she looked around despritly. " She's evacuating with the other citizens... They're carrying her to safety... " I said avoiding Celestia's gaze. "She's being carried? What happened?" She asked with increasing worry. "That bear didn't take to kindly to... Look out! " I suddenly snapped as the bear brought it's massive paw down to squash us. I tried to dive away but because of the massive size of it, I'm going to get squashed anyway.

"Oh shi-" I started to say as I tucked myself up, ready for death.... Then...I realized after a few seconds that i was still alive...huh...this must be the part where everything goes in slow motion and I start seeing flashbacks....or not... What the hell is going on... What is the Princess doing... Oh... Oh my.

The Ursa majors massive crushing paw was being held up by Princess Celestia. What made it a lot more intresting was she appeared to be doing it with pure physical strength alone. She had a serious determined expression as a drop of sweat ran down her forehead as she stood tall and resisted. She seemed to be struggling ever so slightly but it was clear that this Ursa's going to have to try harder to flatten us. This display of strength quickly made me realize something... Celestia...is...really... Hot... The second I thought of that my horn started to emit these strange sparks, that reminded me of the ones that came from Celestia and Luna's Horns right before they hugged the shit out of me... Hmm... My Tail is wagging slowly, my cheeks are hot ,hell I think my nose is bleeding too! What does this crap mean?!? I don't understand Pony body language!

Eventually I looked down, and realization dawned instantaneously. Apprantly...some things never change...regardless of your biology... Shiiiiiiiiiiit. Why now?? Why the fuck NOW? This is not the time to get...excited.... Regardless of how...nice that ass is....it's a bit tighter compared to Luna's but...... Wait.... Did I really just? Nononono! I swear without a doubt that i am cursed! Fucking CURSED!

I seemed to forget the urgancy of this situation because I was just sitting there with a blank expression on the outside, a tiny bit of drool on my mouth. "Heh... You know... I can't hold this forever..." Celestia said with a strained smile. I blinked a few times before silently cursing myself and running away from under the paw. I really should be worrying about the potential deadly bear right here but I'm just a little concerned on how descriptive and detailed my rouge mental fantasies of... you know who, got within the span of a mere 10 seconds. And the worst part? I'm not drunk. Now that I was away from the paw Celestia crouched down low, spreading her wings out as her muscles tensed to hold the paw. With a grunt she used her leg and wing power to push the bear's paw upward. The force of her push ended up flipping the bear upward before it landed squarely on it's back completely confused, she just knocked this huge bitch on it's ass.

Well then... I see she has that quite under control then... Unlike me with these fantasies... Well...let's just say I'm going to need a lot of... "Alone Time"... after this is over...

Author's Notes:

Notes: hey there guys and gals! Bla bla bla anyways I'm a little worried about this chapter seeing as its mostly action (I guess) and the focus of this story for me is comedy. But I think its OK because its only a small part out of the larger thing. Hopefully there are enough laughs in there for y'all! Let me know!

As far as story length... Assuming my life doesn't shit on my face, I'd say this story will be kinda lengthy.. (I often forget it's already kinda long). There's still some neat stuff coming up; mating season, hearth warming, canterlot wedding and Discord's release... Oh I mean uh... Shh! its a secret! All that with plenty in between! No promises though... My life tends to take dumps on my plans quite often...

I would like to know how people feel about characters using weapons. Besides DJ (I think he should) are you guys OK with other characters using weapons (bow and arrow, swords, hammers, daggers, crossbows etc) along with they're magic (mostly Unicorn characters)? Or should they use magic alone? Tell me what you think! Honestly its not a big deal really because action will be few and far between anyway, I just think it would get boring if all magic boils down to pew pew pew lasers.

As far as DJ's status... It seems he's confused about his newfound realization and desires. What will he do? Who knows? Hell even I don't know! Jk.

Another tidbit... I'm pretty sure Ursa Major/minors dont...shoot deathbeams out of their mouths, I kinda added that for fun! :D

Also... If you don't know what the MP7A1 or just MP7 looks like then once again there is this nifty thing humans have called "google" and it has a ton of info on the gun if you're interested... Personally? I think it's smexy! ;) I'll probably have DJ use some other guns as well (although because of the nature of this being...a written story and all. I'm sure it doesn't matter...)

Well don't know what else to say... Stay cool peoples!