Chapter11: A Dragons Revenge

So, I’m about to talk about episode seven, which was Dragonshy.

Yea, so this is what happened.

Arrell, was taking care of his animals. He was making sure they were fed, bathed, and made sure was in perfect health. He even made sure that they were breeding correctly.

He had almost lost all of his animals when Mac came to help. Yea, if you recall that incident where Mac breaded the wrong animals, I’m surprised, because I’m trying to forget what I had saw.

Let me tell you the results of those animals that were breaded wrong. The animals were hybrids. They were an abomination, and a law against nature.

We had put the hybrid animals down, because somehow, they were saying kill me. As in, they were experiencing pain. I don’t know how they even talked, but still. It took Arrell awhile to get fix the huge mistake that Mac did to his animals, so he had hunt for others.

In addition, when I mean hunt, I mean still other ponies animals. While he did that, he also put a ransom, but of course, he wasn’t going to give it back. I do have to admit, that was good idea, since he was taking the animals and all.

I also thought, “and he is supposed to be an element of whatever we are. Then again, I fucking smoke weed, while drinking beer at the same time. We put an unborn fetus in our neighbors mailbox, killed other ponies animals, stealing dead bodies, and making shit that’s against nature’s laws.”

So, anyway, he was feeding his bunny pet, I believe he named it Asshat.

Not kidding. Although, I do recall the bunny had two nicknames, which were H and demon. Since I find Asshat to be a funny name, I’m fucking writing this story, and you’re not, I’ll be calling him Asshat. However, if you don’t want to call him that and want to call him by nickname, then just pretend Asshat isn’t there and pretend H or Demon is there.

So, Arrell was making sure Asshat was safe, but Asshat tried to run away from him. Arrell tried to stop him, but Asshat pointed to the mountain that was from episode 7.

Then Arrell and Asshat knew what was going on. He saw smoke, and he could smell it, because for some odd reason, it came near him, but not the other ponies.

He smelt it and it smelt familiar to him. It was weed and crack smell when smoked. Apparently, before Arrell met the other guys, him and Asshat went on some random not so great adventures together. One of them is by stealing drugs from a dragon.

Not kidding you.

There existed a dragon that did crack, and weed. Ok, maybe I’m going a little over board there, because he wasn’t the only dragon that even did drugs. The other dragons did dragon shit. Which was eat, sleep, and shit. Besides, if you recall the crackle dragon, whom I believe that was on heroin, this dragon was its cousin. Moreover, no, it did not look like him, but had gold bling around its neck, with apparently a giant fucking backwards cap.

I don’t know where that fucking dragon got it from, but ok then.

so, Arrell and Asshat were afraid that the dragon will come back for revenge, but didn’t want to feel guilty of leaving us all behind, because of he did, our souls would haunt him for the rest of his life. Well, just me anyway.

Therefore, he went to the park, where most ponies were. Well, of course he couldn’t say a dragon that he pissed off years ago is coming back for revenge because he stole crack from him.

Therefore, he decided to say flying spaghetti monster, purple pony eaters, and flying aids and cancer was coming to attack the town. When I heard this, I thought how much of a fucking dumbass he is, because that is fucking impossible.

Although, if there was a flying spaghetti monster that was coming here, I will have to give those crazy fucking basturds that practice the flying spaghetti religion.

I’m not kidding you. There is such a religion.

If you don’t believe me, look it up. Trust me; I was even shocked when I heard about it.

So anyway, while Arrell was doing that, I was chilling at home, with me smoking weed while drinking beer, while wolf was passed out from drinking too many tequilas.

He drank about seven bottles full. Each bottle was a litter full to be exact.

What he was trying to do was beat my record, which was at eight tequila bottles, along with five vodka bottles, and three regular beers.

Yea, I’m a champion. Well, as I was saying, I was chilling, and Wolf woke up, and spitted out a letter from Celestia. I opened it up, and guess what it read.

Dear Knight,
I have gotten word that a dragon has appeared near you and Twilight’s hometown. I would send Twilight and her friends to fix the problem. They did a good job last time when this happened, however, the Elements of Harmony are busy now. I am writing this letter to ask you and your friends to take care of the problem. I would go too, however, I am a little caught up at the moment. I hope you understand. I have given you all the information that I have about dragons along with this letter.
From your teacher,
Princess Celestia

Well, what else can I fucking say? She’s being a Trollestia again. I mean being caught up at the moment.

“Right”.

Yea, I’ll believe you, when I see a fucking pony fucking a monkey out in the middle of the fucking streets, while cats and dogs are battling to the death, bunnies killing ponies and humping bees at the same time, and I somehow become an Alicorn, but with rainbows coming out of my ass when I ever fly. While at the same time, have birds humping frogs, while giant fucking ass robots comes to invade, while fighting pop tarts in the sky with bears on unicycles with ak-47’s and a RPG.
That’s when I’ll believe you, because that’s telling me that the world is ending.

As for the elements, I don’t know what to say about that one. I mean, Twilight could be doing something very important with her friends.

Yea. I’m actually being nice here for once, and being understandable.

Not that I’m saying I never was, but, since history is repeating itself for me, I might as well do whatever the fuck I want. Of course, I didn’t give two shits and a flaming fuck. I wasn’t going to tell anypony about this and if they did, then they would fucking died.

I didn’t give a fuck, especially since I was high and all. However, the universe was a step ahead of me, and I was then randomly teleported to the park, along with Wolf.

We were randomly teleported and I just feel like the universe is my enemy now.

Oh well, that’s what happens in life.

That or I can have the universe as my friend, by doing what it wants me to do. I mean, I am a Brony and I’m the only one who ever experienced that every Brony dreams of doing. Being in Equestria. That and meeting the elements of harmony and princess Celestia and Luna. Not only that, but relieving what Twilight and her friends experienced. Therefore, I should shut the fuck up, and enjoy this life I have. Besides, I really shouldn’t be mad at Celestia at all and should thank her for giving me this type of life. I mean, love and tolerance. What the fuck am I writing!?

Yea, fuck it. I’ll continue to be a jackass, resist the universe, continue to hate Celestia, although I never really do hate her, I just see her as a troll, but other than that. I really don’t hate her.

That and I’m going to continue to continue whatever the fuck I’m doing.

Although, I’m pretty sure at a point in time, this will all stop, and basically everything will fall, and I will have no hope left. Besides, everything must end one day. Even immortals have to die some time, right?

Well, as I was there in the park, I yelled out to every fucking pony that was there, that, “every fucking pony listen up! There’s a fucking dragon, and I’m informed by Trollestia, that me and my friends, who basically have problems that I’m worried about, have to take care of this problem. So yea, you ponies are all doomed and might have to move to another town.”
That was what I fucking said. Although, one pony did say he thought it was flying aids and cancer that was attacking.

Fucking idiot.

The thing is that Arrell said, no pony even heard him.

Now, as for the universe thing, well, nopony noticed that I fucking said Trollestia, nor did any one hear me say the word fuck, along with they are doomed and the problem with my friends. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, let me give you a hint.

Neon has a problem with wanting to burn everything. Mac has a sick mind and hates his cousin. Arrell does random shit that I will never understand. Forest fire is an idiot sometimes because sometimes he thinks he can do jackass related shit.
Although, other than that with forest, him and classy jack seems to be the ones with no mental problems at all.

At least that’s what I thought at the time.

Yea, I jinxed it.

There is something wrong with them. Then again, there’s something with me too. I have a drinking and smoking problem. Then again, I don’t give a fuck.

That and Wolf, I really don’t understand him. he’s sick, but yet, random, but at the same time, he’s cool and fun to hang out with. Then again, he is a Troll sometimes. Whatever.

Well, I told Wolf to gather all of my friends to my house, so we could discuss our plans to get the dragon off the fucking mountain. When Wolf did that, all of my friends were at my house.

Well, we then discussed what we had to do. We had to convince him to get off and take his sleep somewhere else.
Yea, I never had a plan for this. The thing is, I know very little about dragons in this universe. I mean, I came across dragons before in other universes before.

In fact, I came across them in three different universes. A universe that needed me, Factory dash, and Tk’s help.
Not a dragon problem, but another problem, which is a story for another time.

I know I have all these stories, but really, I just want to stick to one thing, and I’ll get to the others another time.

Therefore, there was also a dragon universe, and another universe that had a space dragon. If you don’t believe that, then think about this.

If you are aware about the muiltiuniverse theory, then you know what I’m talking about. It’s about how there’s an infinite amount of universes that is like the same universe, but is very different.

For example, take earth. Say you have a choice between fucking a chick or fucking a donkey. Well, let’s say you decide to fuck the donkey. Well, there’s another universe where you fucked the chick instead of the donkey. Also, the universe where you fucked the chick could be in a country where there is communism or nationalism, or everything is the same that you know of, but that’s the only difference.

There trillion upon trillions of universes like that.

Anyway, as I was saying about the dragon plan, we were all going to go up the mountain to get him to move.

Although, Arrell was afraid because he was afraid the dragon was going to remember him, and kill him.

Well, my friends left to get prepared. If you remember in the episode where the element s did that A –team shit. Well, we did that as well. I’m also surprised that we didn’t do anything B-team related.

So, Forest just put set something on fire, and put that little fire colors on his cheek. Classy jack pretty much looked classy or modern classy as I call it, but was prepared to fight. Mac, well, he just grabbed a bat, as an American would.

I really don’t know here, I mean, this is like what they have to prepare themselves with. I mean of course they have other shit, but this shit seems to be the only interesting thing they had with them.

Let’s see, Neon brought crazy shit by defying all laws of physics, along with fire. I brought along, well nothing expect for my wits and skills I acquired when TK trained me.

In addition, Arrell brought along Asshat, because they figured they had to face their demons, and they’re actually were right on that. In fact, with all the shit that happened to me in the past, I will too have to face those demons.

Yea, even though I’m writing this way in the eh future from the time period my life is taking place, I still haven’t faced my demons yet. I mean, we all have to at one point in our lives, right.

Well, we all then headed for the mountain, and started climbing.

No wait, we started walking up the mountain. How the fuck do you walk up a mountain?

I remember in the episode, the Mane six just walked up wards on the mountain side. How the fuck is that even possible. Then again, they did have Pinkie Pie and we do have Neon Party. I guess that makes sense with breaking the laws of physics and all that shit.

Well, then everybody started to joke around and I was pissed as fuck. I was not in the fucking mood to fucking talk, nor hear a fucking conversation from these psychopaths.

I know I’m going a little over board by calling them psychopaths, but they almost seem like psychopaths to me.

So, I then said to them to shut the fuck up, so we could get this over with so we could go home. I was really starting to get tired of the universe making me do shit. So, then everybody did what I said.

Then they started to ask what the dragon will be like. To shut them up, I asked Arrell since he was an animal guy and all. I mean, I knew what the dragon would look like, but I would let a professional explain it, then a pony that just smoke weed and drinks beer all day long.

Well, Arrell was shivering, and lied about knowing the dragon. He said he wouldn’t know, because he never saw one in his life.

Yea, bullshit.

You see, whenever we hang out at the bar, we tell stories. One of those stories we remember as a group, is Arrell seeing and went up to a dragon. He was bragging about how cool he is, because he saw fucking a dragon.

That also got me thinking.

Did the dragon ever tried to kill him where his kind is in no contact, or in fucking space!? Yea didn’t think so.

In addition, Arrell didn’t even start to climb the mountain yet.

He lied, on how he wasn’t a good climber. Then Forest mentioned, he’s a fucking Pegasus. Why not just fly. I mean, even Forest knew that Arrell was an excellent flyer. Well, he refused to go.

Now, Mac was going to make an alternate route for him, but I said, “fuck no, we’re taking him along if he likes it or not.”

What I did was grab some rope Mac had and tied him up and dragged him along the trail. Yea, I just dragged him and he didn’t even fight back. Then again, I guess he was thinking about he had to face his demons one way or another, so he was just letting it happen.

In addition, we bypassed all the obstacles that the Mane six had to do in the episode. I mean we bypassed everything. We just took a short cut, and within an hour or so, we got to the mouth of the cave.

I also wondered, did this cave have a off the grid portal. I mean the portals to off the grid areas pop up in the most isolated of places. In other words, place where there is no human at all. Where animals will not get harmed, or disturbed.

We then all looked into the cave, looking at what we had to face.

I then said to everyone, “listen up. We are dealing with a dragon that does not play nice. What we are going to do is get him out of his sleep and get him to move somewhere else. We might be small ponies to him. But to us, we are more than that. If we stick together, we can be strong. If we all attack at once, we then can get this over within less than an hour. So let’s go in there and show him he fucked with the wrong town.”

Just to let you know, back before I was in the official MLP universe, I was like this. You see, back in with my generation one team. Yea that’s what I call the team. Well, before we go into battle, mostly with TF, I would give my team a quick speech on what they would be facing and what to do as a team. It worked pretty well and I was suspecting that here too.

Well, all my friends agreed, and they didn’t hear a single word that I said. What I mean by that is, they all went individually.
What did I say five seconds ago? I said to stick together, because if a team sticks together, a team will be strong, because everybody is a support. If a team went there separate ways, then the team would fall apart because there would be no one to support the individual.

Therefore, that happened. So, what happened next was Neon going inside first.

I then thought, he was one brave stallion to go and fight that dragon by himself. Then I remembered he breaks laws of Physics.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t enough to beat the dragon, and the dragon beat his fucking ass. He then crashed into one of the rock outside of the cave.

Then Forest thought he was being all though and shit and went to face the dragon himself. Then he came flying out on fire, because the dragon set him on fire.

Strange.

I know he can do the sonic fire boom (I’ll tell you later about it), which means it’s like the sonic rainboom, but has fire instead of rainbow colors.

Yea, Forest gave up quickly.

Now, unbelievably, I thought Mac could fight the dragon, since he reminds me of a southern redneck and all that shit. Well, he was knocked out.

Up next was jack, but of course he failed as well. I then decided to step up to the plate and went into the cave.

Of course I could’ve just easily killed the dragon, but unfortunately, this is Equestria, and like I said before in the past, that ponies don’t really kill one another or things for that matter.

Believe it or not, that’s how I want to live life. In peace, where I didn’t have to kill nobody, but this is what happened to me.
As for the dragon thing, yea, I got my ass kicked.

Of course.

It’s because I couldn’t just simply kill him, which I do have plenty of weapons to kill him with, but like I said, ponies don’t really kill living things.

Then to my surprised, I saw Arrell talking to Asshat and saying how they must go to face their demons. I then saw Arrell and Asshat go inside the cave.

From what I’ve recalled, arrell went up to the dragon and the dragon regocnized him.

the dragon was really fucking pissed at him for stealing his crack.

I wondered how much crack did he stole from him. From what I had gathered, it was only one hundred thousand tons of it and Arrell and Asshat snorted it all within a day or two. What the fuck. How did they not die is beyond me.

Well, Arrell said he was sorry and said fuck off and go to another mountain.

Then the dragon got up and moved to a mountain that wouldn’t effect anypony.

What the FUCK!?

That’s all we had to do was go up and tell him to leave. It’s like going on this trip was fucking worthless.

However, I did gain something on the trip, and that was a lesson learned. Yea, I actually learned something. It’s that you have to face your demons head on, and you cannot run away from your past. It will eventually find you someday.

When I got home, I thought I never would’ve done this, but I actually wrote a legit letter to Celestia this time, instead of using the fake letter I pre-made. Even Wolf was surprised I was doing this as well.

Dear Celestia,
Today, I did not learn anything about friendship at all. However, I did learn something that is a lesson for life. I learned that you cannot run away from your past. The past will always follow you wherever you will go in life. If you had troubles in your past and tried to run away from it, you just have to face those demons head on. Even facing your demons yourself and not have anyone else do it has its awards too. I’m sorry if you were inspecting a friendship later, but I have to be honest, that I did not learn anything at all about friendship. Instead, I learned something that will continue to stick to my life forever.
Your faithful student,
Knight

And guess what I got in return.

Dear my faithful student,
I was suspecting a friendship letter from you. However, the lesson you had learned even taught me. It is true that you can never run from your past. I even experienced that with Luna. I wanted to run away from it all, but I knew Luna would return with anger, but what I should have done, was confronted her myself instead of sending the elements of harmony. Therefore, this lesson you learned is just good as a friendship letter. I believe what you have learned will always stick with you for life.
Your teacher,
Celestia

I was happy about that letter.

I’m serious.

I really did learn something and for the first time, I was actually happy I was here

P.S. also, to just let you know, I never learned anything from the past days that I was there.
There was didly dick.

If you’re afraid I’m going to turn into a softy here, yea I’m not done yet. I just learned something for once in my life that was meaningful to me.

In addition, I fucking got that son of a bitch. I knew Celestia was a Trollestia. She would’ve confronted Nightmare moon herself, but instead, send someone else to do it! Fuck you universe! I’ve finally got proof she is a Troll! Knight one, Universe, 87. Yea, I suck, don’t I?

the turth is, that i never really intended for Knight to learn a lesson about anything, really. it just some how came up when i was writing this chapter weeks ago. also, heres a good question for this chapter. if you recall how the universe is doing all kinds of shit to him, then maybe, the universe made him think those thoughts, about being happy for once and actully learning a lesson. so, did i blow your fucking mind or what? also, sorry if there was any confusion in the story, because i wrote this chapter weeks ago, and when i was editing this to the best of my ability, i found some of the text was weird. i don't recall of putting this stuff in, because like i said, i wrote this chapter weeks ago. well, hope you enjoyed this chapter. also, remember, MAY 24th, mark your calenders, if you have any.