Ambiance, the humans won't hear this.

Nikolai looked at the cave once Link lit up his lantern and Stryker turned on his flashlight.

"This place looks like home after revolution, and revolution wasn't pretty."

"I have to agree with you, this place actually creeps me out." David nervously replied.

Link found a torch and lit it. Three doors opened up and the room filled with light.

"Much better." Stryker turned off his flashlight.

"Hmm, three doors, six of us. Let's split up, Nikolai you're with me. We're taking the right." David said.

"Do I have too?"

"Why not, we need to make sure we can tolerate each other, right?"

Link and Deadpool looked at each other, with not so happy looks on their faces, but what did they have to lose?

"Link and I will take the middle road, maybe I'll find a new way to piss him off too."

Link just blew a lock of hair out of his face in response.

"Well Stryker, we'll take the left." Harry said, flourishing to the door.

"Alright, but let me go on point, I got special forces training." Stryker pumped his Remington 870 and walked over to the door.

"Nick, let's go!"

"Alright already." Nikolai and David went to the right door and opened it. They walked in and the door closed. Link and Deadpool got in the middle door. Stryker went in in a military pose while Harry followed, wand drawn.

Link was slowly walking, he'd rather not get in trouble with the merc right now. Wade however...

"I'm bored, when are we getting to the good part? Can we stop for chimichangas? Where's the bathroom? I want a basketball!"

Link tried his best to block out the merc when they reached a room that looked like some place in the Arbiter Grounds. In the room were a couple of cloaked armored creatures.

What are those?

The armor unveiled their cloaks and drew their massive swords, revealing themselves as darknuts.

"What the... Oh look, a bunch of armor freaks." He saw Link draw his sword. "Let's see... I guess it's time for..." Deadpool drew his own swords.

Deadpool charges at the left darknut while Link fought the right one. He had taken care of dozens of these warriors before, he just had to attack when it was venerable. He looked over to see Wade get his arm chopped off.

"HEY! That's my jacking off arm!" Wade took out his TDI Kard and fired at the darknut. The bullets were deflecting off the armor though.

"Hmm, I guess I'll just kill you the old fashioned way." Wade picked up his arm and put it back in place.

Wade's insane.

Yes, indeed.

Link dodged a massive swing from the darknut he was fighting and took off the last of it's heavy armor. It jumped back and threw it's sword, which sliced Wade in half.

"Oww, hey... that's my dick on the floor, and my spleen on my ass." Wade looked to see the darknut ready to finish off Wade.

Oh crap.

Quickly, use the cheese!

"Cheese! Of course!"

Wade took out his trusty and always fresh fake cheese spray and sprayed it into the darknut's face. As it wiped it off, Wade put his body back together. As soon as the darknut was ready to fight, Wade charged and sliced off the rest of the monster's armor. It threw his sword and drew it's backup.

"Well then author, I'd like some ambiance music now."

Link looked at the nimble darknut and narrowed his eyes. Wade did the same as Link. They both charged.

Link swung his sword, but was blocked by the weapon of the monster. It swung, but Link rolled out of the way and behind and did a spin attack.

Wade slid between the darknut's legs and stabbed the general area of the testicles. It was super effective.

White caption box doesn't know what he's missing.

Link smacked the darknut with his shield, before doing his helm-splitter technique. The darknut fell to it's knees and then exploded in a cloud of darkness. He looked to see Wade decapitate the enemy after kicking it in the testicles.

"And you thought it would die the usual way for me, eh readers?"

I did.

And you're an ignorant fool.

With the monsters defeated, the door in the room unlocked.

"Shall we Linkara?"

Link just shook his head, Deadpool was bloody strange.

David and Nikolai were walking around in the temple aimlessly. David was at least looking rather focused.

"Hey Nick, what's with that?"

Nikolai looked to see something hidden behind some bushes. He moved it to see something strange. He did not know why it was there in the first place.

"Hey hey, it is power switch, but where is handle?"

David looked to see that it was a power switch, and there was no handle.

"Look around, maybe we'll find it."

"Hmm, these words confuse Nikolai."

"Nikolai, those are carvings of what we need." David said as he noted that a terminal, a handle and strangely, a hand was needed to power on the temple.

"Oh, well I'm drunk!"

"Whatever. Let's go looking."

The two went looking in the dungeon, David found the hand and the switch. He put the two together and was still so damn confused at why he need the two to be together. Nikolai found the terminal and the two came together. Nikolai put the terminal in and David finished the switch.

"Hit it?" David asked.

"Da!"

Nikolai hit the switch. And then a voice came, then another, then another.

*Groan*

RAGGH!

SAM!

RA Ra RAHHHGH!

"Fuck." Nikolai said.

"What was that?"

"Just kill what comes at us."

And then the zombies came.

"Zombies, I need headshots."

David summoned an MG42 and aimed.

"MORE DAKKA!"

I vant to go home!

Ahh!

"Stay away from my vodka!"

Harry looked around, he had just saw statues come to life and Stryker beat them up like they were fleshy. He was hoping this wasn't going to end badly.

WRRRR

"What the?"

As the noise finished, the temple lit up, revealing that this temple wasn't as old as they thought.

"What the?" Stryker said, turning off his flashlight. He saw a old radio and activated it.

Doctor Richtofen, how are you?

Good Doctor Maxis.

I trust you gave up on the pointless teleporter projects I assume.

I thought about what you said, and I've... come to agree with you. It is way too complicated anyway, too much work.

Good to hear. Edward, I've been thinking of getting my daughter something for her birthday, any suggestions?

There is nothing like a good German Shepard, but the final choice is up to you Ludvig.

Alright Richtofen, if I find out you've been disobeying orders, you will be terminated, understood!

Yes Doctor!

Good!

*Walking noises*

But that doesn't mean you'll find out about my experiments.

Stryker had listened very closely didn't know what to think.

"Who was this Maxis?"

Harry shrugged, the nearest door unlocked and opened, revealing tunnel with symbols along the walls of a hand holding an atom with the number 935 in it.

"This is strange indeed."

As the two walked, something crawled along the vents.

Crah crah crowe...

"Huh." Link blurted out as the temple turned out not to be so old.

"Hey look, a radio! I wonder if it'll play Wolfgang Gartner." Deadpool said as he turned on the radio.

Entry number 7624D, date: August 23rd, 1945!

Dear diary, today I have learned that Dr. Maxis has taken my teleporter ideas after finding out that they work. He has already built a prototype at Kino der Toten and at Der Riese. Needless to say, I'm pissed. But acceptable losses, for today, I have entered an alternate universe! I found out after roaming around this ancient temple and avoiding the traps. There are colorful talking ponies everywhere, and it's very bright. It disgusts me! I have plans for this world, but first, I need to find out how to get back.

Link looked at Wade, who just had a thoughtful look on his face.

"My sexuality is banana."

Link deadpanned and just walked towards the next room. When he entered, he noticed that it had about 39 Dynalfos.

Why must you torment me so Din?

Oh no! Link, be careful.

And then Deadpool came to the area wearing sunglasses, a vest and holding a boombox. He hit it!

Link was confused as was the monsters as Deadpool began to dance.

Link was confused at why Deadpool was dancing like he was on a horse, and what was that language?

Link was at the exit of the room, and the monsters, were joining in!

I... I... What the HELL!

Deadpool was at the exit with Link, and the creatures actually did not attack the duo, they actually were saying goodbye.

"You were great! Thank you!" Deadpool said.

The duo left the room, and Link was confused to the point where even he did not know if he still had his sanity left.

"That was fun, eh Linkara?"

Link did not respond. Not at all.

Nikolai and David were fighting zombies. Nikolai had touched a rock and some music suddenly started.

"What the..."

"This song speaks to Nikolai!"

Nikolai began to drink as the song went on.

Even your world has such vulgar people.

Yeah, but hey! I like it.

Small wonder I like you.

Yep!

Is it over?

"Great, now that that's done, let's get the fuck out of here!" David said.

"Fine, I'm drunk."

The duo ran as the zombies gave chase.

Stryker and Harry were running away, why?

"We have to make sure those crawling things don't reach us!" Stryker said as he shot a gas zombie dead.

"Oh God, that smell!"

Gross.

"Stryker, there!" Harry said as he pointed at a hidden wall. The two ran through, unaware that they were activating traps and dodging them, the zombies were hit however.

"Keep running!"

The floor collapsed under them as they ran. They landed hard, but they found the other four. Link looked like he was broken, Deadpool looked cheeky and the other two...

"Ugh, what the hell are you two doing?" Stryker asked.

"Making sure zombies don't eat us." David said, taking the full force of the smashing of the door the were holding closed. "Wade, cut off your arm and leg."

"Why?"

"Distraction, idiot!"

"Alright, but it better not cost more than the arm and leg." Deadpool then took out his katana and cut off his leg, then his arm. Stryker grabbed them and tossed them to the drunk.

"Throw 'em Nick!" David said as he opened the door. Nikolai obliged and threw them out the opening. The zombies then followed the meat.

"Good, let's get the fuck out of here!" David said.

The other five nodded and they dashed out.

The six appeared to have entered a sanctuary of some sorts, and in each pillar was some kind of gem. They were colored: A purple one that David walked to, a pink one that Link walked up to, A blue one that Wade teleported to, an orange one that interested Nikolai, a red one that Stryker took a look at and a violet one at the center that Harry went to.

It looks so beautiful.

Must, smash!

What?

Author wants us to destroy this.

Kay.

I'm enjoying this.

Oh mah goodness, this feels funny.

I feel angry at gem, must be because I'm drunk. I'm breaking this gem.

Wow, that looks awesome.

Ugh, why am I reaching for my grenades?

Link, are you okay?

No, I'm going insane! I feel like breaking this gem for no reason!

Link!

Harry, I know what to do here, destroy them.

Yes, it's what I'm feeling right now.

"Guys, the sun's rising!"

The others looked to see the sunrise. They decided to just follow their instincts. They took the gems and dropped them to the floor. David stomped on it, Wade jumped up and opened fire, Link took out his ball and chain and swung it down on the gem, Nikolai took out a China Beach and fired, Stryker fired his M9 into the gem and Harry...

"Confringo!"

Caused the gem to blast away.

The sun rose and the six fell to the ground in agony. They were changing. A flash of light enveloped the room.

Rarity got up, coughing. She looked to see her friends getting up rather weakly in a dusty room. She stumbled over to them.

"Girls, I think that failed."

"Oh no." Twilight said.

"Well ain't that just sad." Applejack pointed out.

"Oh no!" Fluttershy mumbled.

"Aww, that's just great!" Rainbow groaned.

"I know right!" Pinkie responded.

"OHH, my head."

The six mares turned to see some figures walk out of the dust. It was the six humans.

"Wha... OH MY GOSH! WE DID IT! Oh this calls for a party!" Pinkie said cheerfully.

"Yeah, hold off now, my head is killing me, ow." Wade said.

How do I cure headache?

Aspirin.

How'd you get back?

I got forced back.

Oh man, maybe you were a...

Shut. The fuck. Up.

The six humans and six mares smiled, there was much to do now. They began to walk out.

"Hold on, you are not going anyvhere, svinehunds."

The twelve looked to see a grey Earth Pony with a dual swords cutie mark and a cigarette in his mouth. He had a short cropped blood-red mane, a black right eye, and a green left eye.

"Who are you?" Nikolai asked.

"Me, I am ze one who vill kill you! Tuer la Grève 782! Assemble!"

The room filled with red clad mercenaries, holding enchanted blades and surrounded the group of twelve. Harry could only speak two words.

"Oh bullocks."