"Whew. I wonder where Rainbow Dash is?"

I finished suiting up in my armor, and I have to admit, Rarity really made this thing well. I never knew the fasionista could produce ancient human armor, and in such short time. Again, it kind of pains me that she didn't receive any sort of payment. I mean, this should have costed a fortune to make. The only thing I couldn't argue against was the fact that she was the Element of Generosity. I did a check in the mirror and took my Bokken and hitched it onto my hip. I gave a bow in front of the mirror and smiled at myself. Twilight had even enhanced the armor with a spell that it won't get torn if my wings emerge. I walked outside deciding that Rainbow Dash was somewhere down there. I walked out to the front, spread my wings, and flew downwards towards the lights that now decorate Ponyville.

I looked back then pushed forward towards the tiny town and touched down right in the town square. I looked around and saw ponies of all shapes and sizes gawking at my armor. I kept my eyes fixed into the distance as I headed west towards a few set-up carnival tents.

"I'm pretty sure that's where they wanted me to meet up."

I walked forward and found Appplejack. I guessed she was dressed as a scarecrow, which didn't surprise me at all. I trudged over to her, until she looked up from an apple bobbing tank and smiled at me.

"Ah', there ya' are! I was wondering when you would turn up.", she said with that undeniable Southern accent.

"Am I late?", I asked.

"Naw'. Here! Why don't you try bobbing for some apples?", she pointed at the tank.

I smiled and tried to stick my head in, but I hit my head on something soft and hard at the same time. I withdrew my face and I found myself staring to a very similar pair of uneven eyes. Right as I was about to ask what Ditzy was doing completely submerged in an apple bobbing tank, she took a beaded metal string and pulled it upwards with her mouth and on the end, was a bathtub-like plug. All the water drained out and Applejack and me just looked at Ditzy bewildered.

"I didn't know this bucket had a drain plug.", Applejack's mouth hung open.

"Niether did I!", Ditzy smiled, which caused me to smile again. (Seriously, it's like a disease)

Ditzy looked down at the piled of wet apples that were now sitting in the tup and drooped her ears down flat against her head.

"Oh, sorry Applejack. I din't mean to destroy your game. I just don't know what went wrong.", Ditzy lowered her eyes and frowned, which made me a little depressed too.

"Ah, that's all right partner. Here, let me get you cleaned up."

Applejack grabbed a towel with her mouth and began to dry up Ditzy. After she was dry, she gave another cross-eyed smile at Applejack and me and perked her head up.

"Omigosh! I forgot my costume at home! I hope Dinky is with her friends... Anyways, bye everypony!", she said before flying off and nearly getting run over by the flying ice cream truck.

Right as Ditzy had left, I saw a familiar lavender mare show up, dressed in a cape and a pointed hat, both covered in stars. She came up and turned her side to Applejack. She seemed to wait for Applejack to say something.

"Uhhhh... wait! I know this time! It's that ol' uh..."

"Ugh! Not this year too!"

I stepped forward.

"Aren't you Starswirl the Bearded? From the books I've read?"

Twilight suddenly lit up with excitement, as if Chuck Norris had revived a dead puppy by smiling at it.

"YES! Finally somepony gets it right! FINALLY!"

"Ya know, if you would have dressed up like that on my home world, people would think that you're queer."

"What does queer mean?"

*Whisper* *Whisper*

Twilight suddenly stared wide-eyed at me.

"Oooookay..."

I laughed a bit. Then, I was trampled by an over-sized chicken. I coughed out a few feathers that fell out of it and found myself staring eye-to-eye with Pinkie Pie.

"You have any candy?", she asked in a millisecond.

"Uh...no. Sorry Pinkie."

She looked down for one second and then got off of me and smiled.

"Oh, that's fine. I should probably look over-"

BANG!

Pinkie Pie shrieked and galloped away at the speed of light as I saw a lighting bolt strike down. I found myself quite started as well and I heard my A.I. talking inside my head.

"Ambush in progress, activa-", it said in my mind.

"DON'T YOU DARE!", I mentally shouted.

"Fine."

I thanked myself that my A.I. didn't blast every thing in sight again and I heard some familiar laughter coming from a black cloud. I flew upwards and found Rainbow Dash with tears of laughter in her eyes.

"Geh-", she stammered while smiling and bringering her hoof up to her chin.

"BWAAAAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!", she began thrashing hysterecly and pointed at me while she flopped down on the cloud.

I just was floating there, looking at the laughing cyan mare with a rather unamused look.

"Wahahaha! You should have seen the look on your face Ben! Priceless!"

Rainbow Dash was thrashing around on the cloud from pure laughter. I looked down at my armor and found dirt and soil smashed all over it. I flew down, looked up angrily at the cloud, and took a smaller bucket full of water that Applejack had at her stand. I silently flew up to the cloud, and sure enough, Rainbow Dash was up there, laughing her head off.

Too bad she looked so cute when she was in hysterics.

She snorted a few times from laughter and she opened her eyes. Her smiled suddenly turned into a frown as she saw me in front of her with the bucket of water.

Ka-spash!

I outstretched the bucket and the green-dyed water drenched Rainbow Dash. Her mane flew back as the water completely swept over her. I smiled at the unamused sight of a soaked Rainbow Dash and i burst out laughing.

"Hahahahaha! You mess with me, I mess with you even harder! Hahahaha!"

Rainbow Dash continued to stare at me with the "wtf bro" face. My laughter began to die down as Rainbow Dash suddenly outspread her wings. She flew forward and bashed into me incredibly hard. She sent me careering into an alleyway and made me smash down into a pile of hay. I spat out the straw from my mouth and Rainbow Dash landed on my chest and stared me down with a very pissed-off face. She suddenly raised her hoof.

"What? Can't take a joke?", I smiled.

Her eye twitched.

She suddenly slammed both of her hooves in the hay and began laughing her head off right on my chest. She began rolling around in the hay and I fell into hysterics too. We laughed, and laughed, and laughed in the hay and we began throwing the hay at one another. Right as we both nailed each other at the same time with a wad of straw, I found myself staring at Rainbow Dash in the middle of her giggle. She opened her eyes and found herself staring into mine. We stared for a minute until Rainbow Dash withdrew her face and laughed a bit.

"Oh, come on Ben! None of this mushy stuff!"

I chucked to myself and smiled.

"Heh. Whatever you want, Dashie."

"Pffft, Dashie?"

She laughed a bit and took to the skies.

"Hey, I'm gonna go prank some other ponies. I'll see ya later!"

She flew off.

"Don't get into any trouble!"

She turned back of a second.

"Oh, and by the way, I'm totally pranking you back."

She flew off and I waved to her. I walked out of the alleyway covered in hay, and I turned to corner and saw Octavia and Vinyl Scratch walking towards me.

"Yo! There you are!", Vinyl shouted.

I turned towards the familiar DJ's voice.

"Hey, how's it going for you two?"

Octavia, who was dressed as a cello (Gee, that's original), stepped forward.

"Oh, we were more interested in what your costume is."

I looked down.

"Oh, this? Well, it's actually an armor worn by ancient human warriors."

Vinyl looked up with interest.

"Wow! That's so cool! Is that the sword that they used hanging right there?", she asked while pointing to my hip.

"Yes; it's actually a wooden model."

Vinyl smiled and nodded her head while Octavia looked at the sword with the same expression as I always see her.

"Well, see ya girls later, I gotta catch up to some friends.", I waved while my wings shot out of my back. The two mares were quite awestruck by the pure white metal flight tools on my back.

"Wow! Your wings look so cool up close!", Vinyl exclaimed.

"Yes, quite fascinating.", Octavia noted.

I smiled and my wing's rocket pack ignited, allowing me to shoot off into the night sky. I did a barrel roll and started to home into the location Rainbow Dash was supposed to be.

--

"So, Tavi'?", Vinyl Scratch spoke up.

"Yes Vinyl?"

"Did you notice Rainbow Dash also coming from the alleyway that Ben was in?"

"Yes Vinyl. So?"

"They were totally bucking each other."

Octavia threw her mouth open at both Vinyl's foul language, and her remark.

"Vinyl! Your language! And how could you think of that?! They aren't even the same species!"

"Don't judge me."

Octavia slapped Vinyl.

--

I twisted my head from side to side until I found Rainbow Dash, sitting on a cloud, snipe pranking with lighting.

"Yep, that's her.", I murmured to myself as I pitched down. I suddenly got an idea. An awesome idea. A carless idea. A carless, awesome, and most likely irresponsible idea. I was going to do some demonstrating. I pitched myself straight down towards the mare and got many other ponies to point their hooves into the air and start gawking at the sky from my two blueish jet trails following my rocket back. I did three barrel rolls and made the jet trails interweave into a double-helix pattern. I then pitched up and did a large loop in the air and started for the ground again. I fell like a meteor and plummeted straight for the cloud that Rainbow Dash was snipe-pranking from. I gained enough speed so I heard a sonic boom behind me.

That was my signal.

I applied the air brakes and I began to slow my descent. I turned upright and the jet worked against gravity and slowed my decent even more. If my A.I. calculated this right, then I would go right beside the cloud and do an epic touch down.

I should have known better then to trust my A.I.

My A.I. made my fly away from the cloud and sent me closer the the ground. My A.I. suddenly cut the jets and made my wings retract. I looked at my back and then the the ground. I misjudged the landing force and one of my feet slipped. I found myself about to fall backwards and I looked around franticly for anypony that would help me. I looked around, but nopony would help me from falling on my back.

Then, I saw Rainbow Dash fly down and walk up to me with a smile on her face.

"Please hurry.", I said as I began to loose my balance even more.

But then, I saw a devious smile on her face.

"Oh no. Don't you freakin' dare."

She approached me and got closer and took in a breath. She then exhaled on my chest ever so slightly.

I began to tip over.

"Shit. Shit. Shit! SHIT! SHIT! SHIT! SHIIIIIT!"

THUD!

"Ow, my back."

I clutched the back of my head and saw Rainbow Dash smiling down at me.

"Gotcha."

I stood up and towered over Rainbow Dash and pointed a finger at her, which made her kind of frightened.

"You have started a war that you will not win, Rainbow Dash."

She brightened up and got a smirk on her face.

"Oh really?! No one has ever beat The Amazing and totally aweso-"

"I get the point."

Rainbow Dash gave out a frustrated "Arrrrgh!", and made me chuckle to myself.

"Hmph! Just you wait! I'm going to make the biggest prank you will ever imagine! Just you wait and see!"

"You have no idea what a human is capable of with a little determination, Rainbow Dash."

"Whatever!"

Rainbow Dash flew off. I just shook my head towards the sky at Rainbow Dash's none-relenting determination. That mare had no idea what she had gotten herself into. I decided to try and sneak up Rainbow Dash to find out what she was up to.

Besides, what's a better prank then sabotaging someone else's?

I walked around Ponyville and got 'ooohhh's and 'ahhhhh's from everypony that saw me. They kept wondering what I was wearing, and I just had to answer a quickly as possible. I decided to run when ten mares asked the same question at once. I hid in an alleyway and waited for the stampede of mares to pass. I heard the stampede come, and it sounded like a herd of charging bulls. I breathed a quick "Phew.", to myself and turned around.

"Hey, there's another end to this alley."

I looked back to make sure there wasn't anypony following me and I proceeded down the alley. I trudged along and came closer and closer to the end. Suddenly, I heard something. It sounded like...

...a whimper?

I poked my head around the corner and I found Rainbow Dash sitting down the the middle of a small square in the roads. I looked around, but I couldn't find anypony else around. But, I looked closer, and I found Rainbow Dash surrounded by three pegasi. One was grey and had significant size, another was tan, and one had a slight orange coat. I didn't know what they were doing, but they were approaching Rainbow Dash.

"Hey look guys! It's Rainbow Dick! Whatcha' got there?", the tan one said. Rainbow Dash suddenly took a small device and held it behind her back.

"Wha?! Nothing!"

They began to close in on her. Suddenly, the orange-ish coated one flew right over Rainbow Dash's head and snatched the little device she was hiding.

"Hey! Give that back!"

The pegasus turned the device over. There must have been an inscription on the back of it, because he began reading something.

"Prank-o-matic 5000. Guarantied to give your friends the right humiliation and satisfaction to you."

Suddenly, the orange-ish pegasus threw the device to the ground and smashed it with his hoof. The little gadget was crushed to pieces and began to spark.

"No! That costed 100 bits!"

The three pegasi then turned to Rainbow Dash and stepped closer to her, making her shrink down.

"Hah! And what is a little fillyfooler like you going to do about it, Rainbow Dick?"

"Dah, good one Kevin.", the larger and most likely dumber one said. The three laughed in unison and made Rainbow Dash slink down. I was on the edge of the wall and my fingers were crushing themselves into the corner. I waited for the right moment...

Then, the orange-ish one punched Rainbow Dash in the wing. She yelped and the three laughed.

"Hoops! What the hay?!"

"Awww, did I hurt the little fillyfooler? Now listen up Rainbow Crash, I believe that dykes like you shouldn't live anywhere near here or in Cloudsdale.", Hoops snarled.

Then, Kevin punched Rainbow Dash in the face.

Rainbow Dash began to cry.

The shit hit the fucking fan.

"HEY! DIPSHITS!"

Startled, the three pegasi whirled around and came face to face with me, hand on my Bokken, teeth clenched, and a killing look in my eyes.

Kevin smiled.

"Hey! Look! It's that freak from earlier!"

Hoops and Score suddenly got over their frightful look and now painted a smirk on their face. Rainbow Dash got up and hid behind my legs.

"Awwww, isn't that cute? Little Rainbow Dick hiding behind the ugly creature. Hey, Rainbow Dick? Fooled him yet?", Kevin laughed.

"Yeah? Fooled him yet?", Hoops smirked.

"Good one guys.", Score stupidly commented.

"You're making a big mistake. I recommend you stand down, and I won't have to shove this boot up your asses.", I commanded.

"Pffft, you can't take us on. You're a freak!", Kevin remarked.

Then, the three pegasi began to test their luck by walking up to me. As I saw this, I quickly whispered to Rainbow Dash.

"Dashie, get out of here. Things are about to turn ugly."

"What? You can't take them all on by your own! And if you use those weapons in your wings, you could kill them!"

"GO!"

She was taken aback by my sudden demand, but she complied and flew away. I watched her disappearing silhouette in the night sky as she flew away.

"What's wrong, your only chance of standing up to us flying away with her tail in between her legs? I'm not surprised."

My vision began to get more blurry, and I felt my wing's anticipation to burst out of my back and slice them to pieces like the little bitches that they are.

"So? How's it like to buck it with Rainbow Dash? She was only a sex toy to start with. So, it must have been decent. Right, you bitch?", Hoops said.

My wings were now trying to break themselves out, as my A.I. had a sense what was an asshole, and how to deal with the true ones in front of me.

"Dah, hahahaha. Fillyfooler.", Score said.

God, what a dipshit.

Then, the three walked right up to me, and Kevin glared into my eyes. I could feel his breath push against my face. He opened his mouth for an insult.

"I hope you got what you wanted with Rainbow Dash. I know you two have bucked it already. You two are perfect for each other. You both are whores and sluts. So, did it feel good FREAK?"

I suddenly calmed down. At the mere mention of the word, freak, my child hood memories flashed before my eyes. Kids calling me all sorts of names. Psychopath. Antisocial. Retarded. So many times, I hear the insults thrown at me. And I ignore them the best I can. But the one name I could never keep myself from remembering was said right in front of me.

Freak.

I felt my anger building up again, and my vision began to turn a hazy red. I rose taller and taller, until I was easily towering over the three assholes. They appeared unintimidated, so this should be all the better.

"Call...me...freak...one...more...time..."

My body was shaking, my back felt like it could burst at any second, and for a moment, I felt like flaying something when Kevin got brave and stupid enough for his own good.

"Freeeeeeaaaaaaaaaaak.", he smiled as he said it.

Suddenly, my wings ERUPTED from my back picked Hoops and Score from the air. It took a firm hold of them, and threw them together.

SMASH!

The two collided and landed on their back sides.

Kevin was watching behind him at the scene that had unfolded, but failed to pay any attention to my, with my wings that are now glowing black with a white aura outlining them. My wings suddenly took Kevin by his stomach and threw him at the other two fuckers. He sailed through the air and crashed into his cronies. I landed right in front of them and my wings outspread, making myself look much bigger than before.

"Y-y-y-y-you have WINGS?!", Hoops burst out.

"Yes, I do. Haven't seen much of me, have you.", I gritted.

Then, my wings retracted and my vision began to return to normal.

"How about this, no wings."

My stretched my arms out and showed that my MG Wing Zero Gundam wings wouldn't emerge.

"No Bokken."

I slowly bent down and let my wooden sword rest on the ground. I have respect for my precious belongings. I wasn't going to drop it.

"No armor."

I slowly began to take off my armor and set it down neatly on the ground. After that was finished, I saw the three dickasses rise from their crash site and glare at me angrily. They took their stances, which obviously meant they wanted to beat me to a pulp.

"Ben, the pegasi are taking an aggressive stance. Recommended tactic: kill the larger one, then finish off the others while they are startled. Recommended weapon: wing mounted gatling cannons.", my A.I. gathered.

"What? No! I'm not going to kill them!", I talked to myself.

"Hey look, the freak's got no friends, so he's talking to himself. Isn't that special?"

"Ha. Good one Kevin."

"Hey freak! You can't take us all on at once. You might as well run with your tail tucked in between your legs. Oh, and go home to Rainbow Dash. You got no way to win. You've pretty much screwed yourself.", Kevin smirked.

"You forget one thing."

The three stopped.

"Hah, and what would that be freak?", Hoops said with an over confident smile on his face.

I took a wide combat stance and gave myself a wide birth of space.

"You're dealing with a Marine."

Well...uh...THE SHIT HAS HIS THE FUCKING FAN ONCE AGAIN! Plz leave comments down below like good people, and happy reading! Sorry about not producing a chapter last weekend. Blame it on my SD Gundam Capsule Fighter addiction.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Yes, but with real birds and real pigs.