Twilight’s reading voice faltered as Sunset nibbled on her ear, the feeling of her girlfriend’s lips and teeth disrupting her ability to focus on the words printed on the page. “...Sunny...” she half whined, squirming.

Hot breath passed over her ear when the redhead chuckled softly, amber skinned fingers coming up to loosen Twilight’s ponytail so they could run through her hair more easily. “...Sparky...” Sunset teased back, before those lips traced down and along her jawline.

The lavender skinned teen couldn’t help herself, angling her neck to give Sunset the access she wanted, the book they had been reading together forgotten in favor of the affectionate attention sending pleasant tingles along her nerve endings. Each kiss, each nip made her heart beat just a little faster, even as the feeling of fingers and nails stroking through her hair, barely scratching along her scalp and down her neck soothed and relaxed her. A soft, happy sound escaped Twilight when her girlfriend found the place where neck and shoulder met, teeth marking the sensitive spot with little love nibbles and heated kisses.

Sprawled on her stomach as she was, there was little Twilight could do to reciprocate. Instead, as Sunset shifted, pressing against her with just enough force to keep her where she was, the dark haired girl found herself able to bask in what she was feeling instead of focusing on thought or action. Sunset’s touch was fire, heat that wound through her veins to her core, making her heart race and her breath catch...and it put years of fantasizing to shame with what it was doing to her. Nothing she had read or daydreamed about had ever come close to the shivers that went through her every time the other girl’s mouth met her skin—the only thing that even remotely compared were the heated dreams that had left her ragged and wound up the week before. Twilight’s ears registered a breathless moan; it took her several seconds to realize she had made the sound.

Some part of her realized dimly that she should probably stop this before it went too far, but for once she found herself wanting to let it go on longer, to not stop what felt amazingly good and right so quickly. Especially not with the beautiful girl that was pressing her into the mattress moving her hair out of the way to pepper kisses on every inch of her neck that the loose collar of her shirt left exposed, murmuring soft words that Twilight couldn’t quite make out, but that were so filled with warmth and affection that she could practically feel the emotions they were meant to convey.

Fabric shifted, and feather-light pressure traveled across her shoulder blade to her shoulder, then her arm, Sunset’s hand stroking its way down until her palm rested against the back of Twilight’s hand, lacing their fingers together. A throaty sound, one of those uniquely Sunset Shimmer noises, vibrated the air, sending another shudder through her.

She could feel Sunset moving again, feel the sensation of one of the other girl’s long legs sliding across her rear in a move that left the taller form straddling her. Sunset leaned more firmly against her as she did, seeking out Twilight’s other ear to nip playfully. The gesture was lost amidst the realization that Twilight could feel Sunset’s breasts pressing into her back, and she found herself committing every little detail to memory. Whimpering, the dark haired girl arched her body into her girlfriend, twisting and shifting until she was on her side under Sunset, pushing up to meet her in a heated kiss.

Fiery hair fell around their faces in a curtain, blocking out sights and sounds, narrowing her world to Sunset’s blue-green eyes, flushed cheeks, and hungry mouth working against her own. Fingers ghosted along her jawline before tangling in dark hair, pulling her even closer.

When they parted briefly for air, foreheads touching, both were breathing heavily, and Sunset was trembling slightly. “...Sparky...” she murmured, voice husky with desire.

Twilight shuddered again as the sound of the familiar nickname escaped the other girl in a tone she had never heard before. It sent an electrical sensation crawling along her skin, leaving the air charged with emotions and anticipation. She brought their lips crashing together again, wanting more of Sunset’s touch. Her body twisted yet again, hips rolling and arching out of instinct, her thigh pressing up between Sunset’s legs.

Sunset gasped sharply into her mouth, and ripped herself off Twilight with a startled cry. Brain fogged with desire, it took several seconds for the nerdy girl to register what was happening. She rolled, sitting up to find Sunset hugging herself, eyes wide and staring at nothing as she struggled to draw in a full breath. “Sunny?” she managed worriedly, her own anxiety spiking. “Sunny, what did I do? What’s wrong?”

Blue-green eyes were filled with panic and fear, and Sunset shook her head, hunching even further in on herself. Twilight reached for her, only for her girlfriend to flinch away. It hurt, having Sunset recoil from her like that, but her worry and the beginnings of panic edged that out quickly. In desperation, she cried out for the one person in the house who might be able help.

“Cady!”

It was shaping up to be a good day, all in all. Cadence had spent most of the morning working on an article for her blog, as part of a campaign against domestic violence she was supporting. Now, as early afternoon moved towards evening, she was sprawled on the bed in her room, a headset carrying Luna’s crowing voice to her while a stream of her latest competitive shooter game played on the screen. At present, the house was empty except for her and the girls, and the pair had been holed up in Twilight’s room since lunchtime. When she’d checked on them, her Ladybug had been reading aloud to Sunset from some sciencey tome, oblivious to Cadence poking her head into the room.

Velvet would be back soon, she mused, looking at the clock on the screen. The older woman had run to the store to pick up ingredients for the night’s dinner. Cadence reached up to tug the headphones so one ear was uncovered—that way, she’d hear when Velvet got home.

“Eat hot lead, you whiny little prepubescent twit with mommy issues! Insult my sniper skills again, I dare you! I’ll spawn camp you until you cry for mercy!” Her best friend’s voice echoed in her ear immediately after the sharp bark of a digital weapon.

“Easy, Lu,” she teased. “It’s just a game...”

“A competitive game!” came the retort. “There’s no place in a competitive match for an obnoxious little snot nosed brat to be shooting his mouth off about how Hello Kitty would be more my speed just because I don’t come with a built-in joystick! I was crushing people in online games when he was still shitting his diapers!”

She giggled. “Someone is tense. Maybe you should come over and have drinks at the apartment with Shiny and I one night over your break.”

“I could really use a break like that. You guys going up to the family estate for New Years? Or are you avoiding the worst of Shining’s snooty relatives this year?”

Cadence rolled her eyes. “We’re staying home this time. Lucky for us, he has to work—Great Aunt Aurora can’t get offended by the police force like she could if we just said we didn’t want to deal with the judgmental stares.”

Luna laughed amidst a hail of gunfire. “If they want to judge, you guys should bring me as your ‘plus one.’ Give them some reason to really judge you guys.”

“Oh Lu, I—”

“Cady!” Twilight’s panicked shout ripped through the upstairs.

Whatever she’d been about to say died, and she jolted upright. “Gotta go, Luna. Something’s wrong.” The headset was tossed aside without even waiting for her best friend to respond, and Cadence rushed to the source of the cry for help.

The sight that greeted her in Twilight’s bedroom was one that she had no immediate explanation for. Both girls were flushed and disheveled, clothing askew and their hair tousled. Twilight was kneeling on the bed, tears in her eyes and on the verge of a panic attack, her hands twitching as she started to reach for Sunset, only to jerk herself up short in a continuous cycle. That alone wouldn’t have caused her too much concern—Twilight’s anxiety was a well known adversary. What threw her was when she moved around the side of the bed and realized that Sunset was curled practically into a fetal position, back pressed against the footboard, hyperventilating and gripping the sides of her head tightly.

“Ladybug,” she spoke softly, deciding to bring Twilight's nerves back to a normal state first. She needed to know what had happened to try and calm the other half of the pair. “I need you to take a deep breath with me and come here. We need to give Sunset some breathing room, okay?”

Purple eyes tore themselves from the redhead to focus on Cadence. Slowly, shakily, she got up from the bed and joined the woman, trying to do the breathing exercise Cadence had taught her. Pink skinned arms pulled her into a comforting hug. “There we go, Ladybug. You’re safe and it’s going to be okay, but I need to know what happened so we can help Sunset. Do you think you can tell me?”

“I don’t know!” Twilight sniffled. “Everything was fine! We were reading together, on the bed, and then we...got...distracted...” Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment.

“So you were making out,” Cadence clarified.

The younger girl nodded. “Y-yes,” she admitted in a tiny voice, still red in the face. “We...were making out...and it...it felt good. I was enjoying it, and I thought she was too, but all of a sudden, it wasn’t okay anymore, and I don’t know what I did wrong, Cadence!” Her voice pitched up an octave with mounting anxiety, which her former sitter soothed with another hug and some more breathing instructions.

Once she was calmed again, Cadence asked, “Alright. Now, I know you said you were enjoying it, but did you make sure she knew you were?”

Lavender fingers played with her hair. “It...wasn’t...I wasn’t trying to get away? I kissed her back, I didn’t say no or push her away or anything like that...”

Watching the girl still staring into space on the bed, Cadence thought about some of the conversations she’d had with Shining about Sunset. “And what about Sunset? Did she ever say or indicate she wasn’t okay with what you were doing?”

Twilight looked up at her, frowning. “She was the one who started it, Cady. She was on top of me, and I was letting her set the pace. If she wasn’t wanting to go any further, wouldn’t she have stopped before?” Her brows furrowed further, and hurt flickered in her eyes. “Besides, Sunset...she’s never been afraid of me touching her before, not even at the worst times.”

That was concerning, and Cadence studied the girl who was her sister in every way but blood. “Twily, sweetie...do you know if Sunset has ever been assaulted?” She hated to ask, to pry, but it was an obvious explanation for Sunset’s response.

Something flickered in Twilight’s eyes, and a shudder went through her body at the question. “Not...not that she’s ever told me.” Her eyes drifted back to her girlfriend, whose breathing had started to even out. “I think she...learned how to protect herself against stuff like that to keep it from happening.”

Mi Amore Cadenza knew in an instant that Twilight wasn’t telling her something, despite telling the truth. “Okay. I want you to go downstairs and make us some hot cocoa. Can you do that while I talk to Sunset, see if I can calm her down enough to talk to us?”

Indecision written on her face, Twilight stared at Sunset for a long time before sagging. “Alright.” She moved out of Cadence’s embrace and moved carefully towards the door, keeping her motions slow to avoid startling Sunset. As she did, one amber skinned arm snapped out too fast for Cadence to follow, trembling digits wrapping around Twilight’s hand, stopping the teen in place. “Sunny?” she asked quietly, freezing her movements. “What is it?”

Cadence caught a glimpse of wild blue-green eyes amid the shadows cast by the girl’s hair and the way her head was tilted. “...Sparky...” Sunset managed in a tight voice, the rest of what she had to say falling to a whisper too soft even for Cadence to hear.

Purple fingers squeezed warmly back. “I’m okay, Sunny. I’m just going to make us some hot drinks, and then I’ll be back. I promise.” She gave Sunset’s hand another squeeze before letting go.

Once she had disappeared, Cadence pulled over the desk chair and sat down. “Sunset?” she tried, remembering what Shining had discussed with her after Thanksgiving.

“How’s your wrist?” There was a note of teasing in her voice as the pair of them slid under the covers.

Shining Armor frowned pensively. “Bruised. There are guys on the force with less grip strength than Sunset Shimmer.” He rubbed his wrist lightly.

“Sounds like they ought to raise the recruiting standards then,” Cadence quipped with a smirk. “If a teenage girl is stronger than they are, how can they hope to fight criminals? Or are you worried she might wipe the floor with you if she takes you up on a spar sometime?”

Her lover shook his head. “It’s more than her strength that worries me, Cadence. What the hell has that poor kid been through to leave her like that?” At her questioning glance, he elaborated. “She wasn’t awake at all when she stopped me from touching Twily. Sure, she’s an orphan and on her own, but you don’t see that in every kid who has had a rough home life. You see that in people who lived in fear for life and limb, who learned to sleep with one eye open so they would actually wake up the next morning. That’s something you get in war veterans and refugees from war-zones...not teenage girls. Especially since her reaction was aggression and not fear. Kids from abusive homes? We see those, more than i care to think about. They hide under things or in tight spaces: beds, closets, cabinets, desks, places where a bigger aggressor can’t reach them, and if you try, they cringe and cower and try to get away.”

Cadence frowned. “Twilight hasn’t mentioned her doing anything like that, or anything like what happened downstairs. If she was that twitchy, wouldn’t she lash out at Twilight when she sleeps over?”

Shining sighed. “Not necessarily—she was instinctively protecting Twilight from me tonight. That says a lot.”

She cuddled close to him. “At least we know Twily is safe with her then. She cares enough about her that even asleep she wants to keep her safe.”

“We still need to be careful. If you ever see her like that again, you need to make sure you don’t touch her, not until you’ve gotten her to look at you and recognize who you are. I don’t want to see you or Mom or Dad hurt, especially because Sunset doesn’t actually want to hurt any of us. She can’t help her reactions like that.”

A smile crept across her face when he kissed her forehead. “I promise I’ll keep that in mind, Shining.”

True to her word, she was careful to remain out of Sunset’s personal space bubble as she called her name again. “Sunset?” The head came up slowly, those eyes training on Cadence now, recognition flickering in their depths. She continued to speak in the same tone she used on Twilight. “Sunset, you’re safe here. No one is mad and no one is going to hurt you. Twily is really worried about you, and so am I. Do you understand?”

Sunset nodded slowly, jerkily. “‘M sorry...” she managed.

“You don’t need to apologize, Sunset. You didn’t do anything wrong,” she soothed. “I sent Twilight to make some drinks so that you could both have a chance to calm down. Do you think you can relax and take some deep breaths for me?”

The teen watched her with a hint of wariness, but she took several slow, deep breaths, her body slowly uncoiling from the tight ball into a cross legged pose. She was still reserved and defensive, yet she hadn’t shut down entirely. Cadence counted that as a victory. She considered her words carefully before she spoke again. “Sunset, I know about you and Twilight, and I want you to understand that I’m not here to judge her or you for any reason.”

The redhead rubbed her arm. “Yeah....I...thought you knew. Twilight trusts you, said you were the one she talks to about stuff like that.”

“A lot of time, yes.” She offered Sunset a smile, before becoming serious again. “I wanted to ask while Twilight is downstairs...I know something triggered your reaction, and I asked Twilight, but she didn’t seem to know. Did someone ever—”

Sunset was already shaking her head vehemently, hands clenched into fists. “No. No. I...Back in my days as Queen Bitch...there were a few creeps who...assumed things about me, and a few tried grabbing me in the halls, but I introduced all of them to why I wear boots. They got the message quick.” Her eyes burned for a moment with something dark, sending a shiver down Cadence’s spine. It made the air heavy, and it carried into her voice when she spoke. “Anyone who tries that on me or my friends will regret it.”

There were footsteps from the hall and Twilight reentered the room with three mugs carried carefully as she navigated around Spike, the dog ever hopeful that she might drop something tasty. Seeing Sunset’s much improved state, she handed Cadence her cocoa first, before stepping closer to the bed. “Sunset?” she asked in a quiet voice.

As Cadence watched, Sunset relaxed visibly, already reaching for Twilight. The shorter teen happily curled up against her side on the bed, Sunset’s arm draped over her shoulders.

“I...I’m sorry...if I did something wrong, Sunny,” Twilight whispered, holding her cocoa mug in both hands tightly. There was a tremor in her voice as she shrank in on herself.

Clearing her throat, Cadence stopped the potential for another panic attack before it got started. “I don’t think it was anything you did, Ladybug.” Her eyes flicked to Sunset, watching how the redheaded girl’s expression became confused and then pensive, and how it was at odds with the way she leaned her head against Twilight’s in an affectionate nuzzling gesture.

“It...it wasn’t really you, Sparky,” she admitted, eyes unable to look at the other two people in the room. “It was...” Her voice faltered, and her hand shook as she took a sip of her drink in a stalling tactic. “I don’t...know how to explain. I was with you and I was enjoying being with you...but then...I felt...”

Cadence could hear the frustration, confusion, and tinge of fear in her voice. “It’s alright, Sunset. Take a deep breath, and go slow. Don’t worry about how what you’re saying sounds, or if it makes sense to us.”

Sunset exhaled heavily, then started again, looking more at Twilight than Cadence. “...I...remember how I told you that...people look weird to me? That you’re the only one who I’ve ever felt this way about?”

Twilight tucked her face against her girlfriend’s shoulder. “I remember.” She hesitated, before asking, “Has...has that changed?”

“No!” Sunset’s reply was filled with intensity and emotion. “No—you’re special to me, so different and unique among every other human on this planet!” The arm around Twilight gripped her more firmly. “...you...you make me feel things...things that I’ve never felt, not like this. You’re in my head and under my skin and it’s like I’m burning up and made of ice at the same time...” Like a dam breaking, now that the words had started, they poured out freely. “I...I feel like I’m losing control, like things are happening and I can’t tell if what I’m feeling is right or wrong...I have no idea what I’m doing, Sparky...and I don’t want to hurt you!”

Some part of Cadence was squealing internally at the scene she was witnessing, the obvious love and passion worth a hundred trashy romance novels, particularly because it was happening for her little Ladybug. She pushed the urge to hug them both to the back of her mind, chastising herself. This was a situation she was starting to understand, and in this case, Sunset needed an adult to help her make sense of it all. She gave them a minute to let the words settle and for Twilight to reassure the agitated girl before she interjected again.

“Sunset...” Cadence made sure to keep her voice the same non-confrontational, even tone she had been using. “Has anyone ever sat down with you to explain about sex and sexuality? More than just about the clinical, detached explanation of biological reproduction, I mean.”

Resembling her name more than ever with the blush staining her cheeks, Sunset looked at Cadence sheepishly. “I learned from books, mostly. I...didn’t really want to be in a classroom full of people talking about any of that. I looked up what I needed to know.” Her face twisted into a grimace. “Human bodies are disgusting,” she muttered, “and I just don’t get the fixation on sex. Everything humans do seems to come back to it, and there’s so many rules and attitudes about it, most of which make no sense!”

“To be fair, most of the commonly held beliefs and attitudes about sexual behavior, sexuality, and gender stems from religious ideologies or long held cultural systems that themselves were often influenced by religious beliefs,” Twilight piped up, tilting her head up to nuzzle into Sunset’s neck briefly. “In fact, those are some of the main factors that continue to contribute to negative attitudes in regards to same-sex relationships in certain parts of the world.”

“...that part I don’t get...but it’s not just the stigma about what kind of person you want to be with...” Sunset fumbled, struggling with her thoughts. “It’s that everything seems to come back to sex! Whole genres of literature about sex, how in every TV show or movie there’s some form of romance or sex involved...nothing seems to escape it—even advertising makes use of ‘sexy’ clothing to sell anything and everything! It’s like the entire species has sex permanently on the brain!” She slumped. “And I didn’t. I never thought much on it. I never cared before.”

The use of past tense was telling, Cadence decided, and probably at the core of the current issue. She opened her mouth to speak when Sunset lifted her head, her eyes brimming with tears. “What’s wrong with me?!” she cried, every syllable laden with confusion and fear.

Cadence barely managed to grab the mug Twilight thrust at her, freeing up her hands to twist and wrap her girlfriend in a tight hug. “Oh Sunny...” the smaller teen whispered softly, fingers gripping the fabric of Sunset’s shirt.

Cocoa mugs were placed on the desk, and Cadence carefully moved to sit on the edge of the bed, reaching out to rescue Sunset’s mug as well. Once there was no more danger of wasting perfectly good chocolate, she reached out and patted the redheaded girl’s ankle in a gesture she had used on Twilight in the past to offer support. “Sunset,” she said gently. “There’s nothing wrong with you. Those feelings you are describing are completely normal and healthy, and it’s something most people experience as teenagers.”

“Normal?!” Since her arms were free, she tugged Twilight into her lap and hugged her as if she were a life sized teddy bear. “I feel like I’m coming apart inside my own hide, like I’m losing my mind and my control! How is any of that normal?!” She was starting to shake uncontrollably.

“Sunny...” Twilight soothed, shifting in Sunset’s grasp until she could bring her companion’s head down to rest their foreheads together. She didn’t say anything else, but it didn’t seem she needed to. Mi Amore Cadenza suppressed another squeal at the gesture of comfort—it really wasn’t the time, but she would have to have girl-talk with Twilight sometime soon or she might burst.

“Can I ask what about it is causing you to be so upset?” The pink skinned woman decided to change tactics slightly, to try and hone in on specifically what was rattling Sunset’s nerves so badly. “Is it because you’re afraid of losing control? Or because feeling this kind of arousal is so new to you? Or is it something else?”

Blue-green eyes squeezed shut tightly, and she sounded ashamed. “Both. How...strong the feelings are...and...how they make me feel like I’m going to lose control...just like when I get angry. I don’t want to hurt Twilight!”

Her heart clenched painfully, and found herself wanting to hug Sunset herself. This was a conversation that should have been given years ago by a loving and supportive parent or family member, not her girlfriend’s sister-in-law. Taking a deep breath to steady her own nerves and the rising ire at the adults in Sunset’s history, she decided to approach it one issue at a time. “Sunset, I know the passion of the moment can feel a lot like anger, but they are very different in practice. Both are hot, and intense, and they do cloud your mind and judgment, and there’s a cathartic feeling that comes from giving in...but fury is all about destruction, about causing hurt to someone else. Arousal is about pleasure and when there are powerful positive emotions like love and friendship involved, sex can be a wonderful, beautiful thing that builds up and makes everyone involved feel good.” Her mind flitted to memories that never ceased to make her smile. “Your sexuality and desires are something you shouldn’t be afraid of, as long as everyone involved is a willing, consenting participant. Repressing those feelings or being afraid of them and how they make you feel will only make them stronger...and make you unhappy.”

Twilight snuggled more fully into Sunset’s embrace. “You’d never hurt me, Sunset. I know that, and I promise, I’m not afraid to tell you if I want to stop...and I’m okay with whatever you’re comfortable with. We aren’t in a hurry, remember? ‘Take it slow and see how it goes?’” Her fingers came up, tucking loose strands of hair behind Sunset’s ear. “You don’t have to be afraid of how you feel...we can always stop and talk about it, anytime you need.”

Oh yes, that sisterly girl-talk was going to happen, and the sooner the better. “As for the strength of the feelings, and that you’ve never had that happen before...some of that has to do with psychology—there are many different ways a person can develop physical attraction or sexual desire. Some people are attracted to specific genders or specific body types, some people are attracted to personalities or certain qualities about a person and gender plays no part, some people don’t feel any kind of sexual desire at all regardless of circumstances or anything about another person, some people don’t feel physical attraction and desire until they develop a meaningful mental and emotional connection to someone—and that’s just touching the surface of sexuality and arousal. It doesn’t mean there is something wrong with you, either before or now. If it’s just Twilight you’re attracted to and feeling this way about, if this is how your mind and heart work, then that’s how they work. It’s still completely normal and healthy.” She smiled. “You are normal. This doesn’t make you strange or broken or a freak. It’s simply one more thing that makes you Sunset Shimmer. Okay?”

Eyes flitted back and forth between Cadence and Twilight, and Sunset slowly relaxed, tucking her face into the crook of Twilight’s neck. The older woman raised an eyebrow at the dark haired girl, mouthing a question at her. Twilight nodded firmly, her own lips moving without sound: ‘Thank you.’

Cadence gave Sunset’s ankle another comforting pat. “I think I hear Velvet’s car. I’ll help her with the groceries—that should give you two about an hour to compose yourselves and talk before she calls you for dinner.” She rose and headed out of the room, shutting the door behind her to give them privacy—as much as she loved watching romance in action, some conversations were best had without an audience.

I'm sorry about teasing you guys--I know you're probably all waiting for some gratuitous SunLight chapters, and I promise you, you'll get some...but not yet (I have a four chapter, 24,000 word date event already roughed out for in arc 2, for example, that is nothing but our two girls having a sweet outing.) Sunset's still got a ways to go, and this is part of her character development that has been hinted at since the Thanksgiving chapter, if not before.

(though I'm going to note, before someone misreads it that way--Sunset is not against sexual intimacy or asexual in that particular sense of the word, and this isn't a plot thread about "curing that with sex with the right person." Its a much more complicated issue that goes back to the same psychology I've been exploring all along: She's a unicorn in the body of a human girl.)

This is also one of those chapters where we see Cadence being Cadence (and a shipper. Because really, you know she'd ship them)--I really like the idea that both versions of Cadence are about more than just romantic love, but about promoting all kinds of love and healthy relationships. Besides, I think she's a character who never gets enough fair screen time. We also get a bit more here on her relationship with human Luna, which is a whole huge aspect of the character I'm excited to eventually dig into with the college side story. Hehe.