Prelude

Some time has passed since Hearts and Hooves day and me and my wives' insane sex marathon. The only three events that happened before we reach to the present, are these. When we got a new resident in town, Cranky Doodle Donkey, Pinkie made it her life's mission to make him one of her friends. Though to be honest, when you try to make friends with a donkey that's a combination of Squidward and Eeyore, you're bound to have some difficulties. After a few failed attempts, she finally succeeded in making him her friend, by reuniting him with an old flame he had back in the day. Guess the best way to make friends is to hook them up?

A week later, Fluttershy attended a seminar led by a minotaur named Iron Will. After she attended, she became an entirely different pony, and it really wasn't for the best. She was being more assertive to those that treated her like a doormat, that was the good part. The bad part was when she started acting rudely and being a total bitch to her friends including myself. The final straw was when she yelled at my boys and made them cry. When she realized what she had done, she locked herself up in her cottage for three days. She was lucky I wasn't the one taking them down the road, otherwise, it would have gotten ugly. Thankfully the situation was defused before it escalated further.

Two weeks after the Iron Will crap. Twilight was visited by, well, herself, at least a time-traveling version of herself a week into the future. Yeah, I know how crazy that sounds. Apparently, the future Twilight came to deliver a warning about some kind of threat that did not spell good news for anyone. At first, we thought it might be when Cerberus left Tartarus and terrorized the town. He would have continued, had it not been for Fluttershy and me sending him back. Apparently, present Twilight didn't feel this was the dangerous situation and persisted in finding what it was. She spent days in the library obsessing over what the disaster could be and slowly but surely, started turning into future Twilight. Started to look like Snake Plissken from ' Escape from New York'.

Once the week leading up to the event came, she went up to Canterlot with Spike and Pinkie to find a time-traveling spell. When they came back, they told me how it was all just a misunderstanding. Time travel's funny that way. Anyway, we were all heading out of town to prepare for a special event. The dragon migration.

I was heading down with a shovel and cooler to a barren field to where we were going to dig a trench to watch the dragon migration. Off in the distance, I could see Rainbow Dash and Jackie digging the beginning of our trench. When I got there, I started digging right beside them. " How's it going you two?"

" It would be better if you helped." Dash was struggling with removing a large rock from her path, so I went ahead and removed it for her. " Thanks, Joe."

" You know, you keep up that brash attitude of your's, you'll never find a significant other." I gave her a cheeky smile knowing that she hates when people talk about her being single or when they try to hook her up.

" Joe, don't you go being mean to our friend now. Here, go and make yourself useful and make a ramp for the trench." Jackie gave me a wink and returned to her side of the trench. For the next fifteen minutes, we continued our digging until we had a twenty-foot long, four-foot deep trench, perfect for viewing a migration without being seen from the air.

" You know, if we put some brush along the edge, it would resemble an old duck-blind that dad and I used to hunt from." I went over to the edge of the forest and started cutting down a few of the branches that had the most foilage that would cover the trench perfectly. Once my task was done, Pinkie and Twilight came over to watch the spectacle. " Welcome friends, to the most luxurious nature blind in all of Ponyville." I reached into the cooler and pulled out a twelve-pack of Shiner Buck beer. " Can I offer anyone a cold one?"

Pinkie zipped up to me and snatched one of the beers. " Don't mind if I do." She went and started drinking the bottle as a new-born would drink. " Ahh, that hit the spot."

" Glad to hear, where's Fluttershy? Isn't she coming?"

" No, she has this terrible fear of dragons, so she won't be joining us for this." Dash seemed upset that she wasn't coming. But I guess if one fears dragons, then a dragon migration watch isn't the best place to be.

" Oh well, it's her loss." Off in the distance, I could see Rarity and Spike coming up. " Well, if it isn't my favorite pony/dragon couple. care for a drink?" I held out two beers for them, Rarity declined while Spike took one of them. I opened the one that was declined and took a swig. " So Twilight, when does the migration start?"

She looked over to the western mountain range, just over the tallest peak, a swarm of dragons started flying over. " Right about now." Within minutes, we could hear the roars of the dragons and the flapping of their wings.

" This is awesome." I was in awe at the spectacle before me. There were dragons of all sizes and colors, not to mention tempers as one of them started fighting with another, starting a dog fight in the air. The fight soon ended when the dragon that was attacked, spewed a torrent of flames from his maw. Unfortunately, the fire was coming right for us. " Take cover!" The fire reached the edge of the brush and it caught on fire. I reached into the cooler, removed all the beer and soda, and poured all the melted ice onto the non-talking burning bush.

" (whistles) That's some firepower. This will be great for my journal." Twilight went and wrote down a few things in a scroll that she brought along with her. I would have thought that living with a dragon would be enough research material. " I never get this much material with just Spike."

" Why is that? I would think raising a dragon from an egg would be all the material you need when it comes to research."

" I don't think you'll get much done when you live with a dragon that wears an apron when he cooks or obsesses over comic books." Off to the side, I saw Spike looking like he was feeling insecure about what kind of dragon he is. It's never good to compare yourself with others.

" Now, Rainbow Dash. Spikey-Wikey may not be like other dragons, but he's more than capable of being the best dragon there is." Rarity nuzzled Spike's cheek trying to cheer him up, but I can tell that he needed something else.

" Thanks for the support Rarity, but I think I need to be only for a while." Spike got out from the trench and I assumed he headed for the library.

I looked over to Dash and got ready. " Why you little!" I grabbed her by the throat and started mock chocking her. " I'll teach you for making Spike feel inadequate about who and what he is!" I continued this action for some time until Luna came down the ramp with the boys.

" Joe, what are you doing?"

" Teaching Dash a lesson on when to keep her pie-hole shut." I held Dash in one hand while I cradled Orion in my other. " Did you happen to pass Spike on your way down here?"

" We did. He seemed kind of upset. He kept mumbling about how he's just as much a dragon, like the ones up there." She pointed up to where the dragons were flying overhead while Jack started playing with her hair. " Jack, don't play with mommy's hair." She started tickling his stomach with her wingtips to make him stop pulling her ethereal hair.

" Here, let me take him off your hooves." Jackie came over and took Jack from Lunas back and started tickling him. " Joe, maybe you should go see if Spike's alright."

" Not to be sounding bitching, but why does it always have to be me who has to diffuse a situation, or make sure someone is alright?"

" Because as a royal and a warrior, you are entitled to help others when the occasion calls for it." Luna then leaned into my ear and whispered. " Plus, I find your heroics very sexy." She then nibbled my earlobe and pulled it some before going back to the others.

" Right.....right I knew there was a reason why I do this. Okay, I'm gonna find Spike, and see if I can cheer him up." I handed Orion to Luna and vacated the presence before anyone noticed the boner growing in my pants. I went to the Library and went in, only to find Spike, crying in a fetal position in the corner. I went over to him and tried to comfort him. " Spike, you alright man?"

" Not really. ( Sniff) I've been thinking about some things." He got up from the floor and wiped most of his tears away. " And I think. I think I need to be with my own kind, at least for a while anyway."

I put a reassuring hand on his shoulder and looked him straight in the eye. " If this is about what Dash said because if it is I can go back and throttle her a little longer if that'll help." We both started to laugh at the mental image of what has happened before and will most likely happen again. " When do you plan on going?"

" Tomorrow morning, and I'll probably stay for a few days at where ever they're staying at." He then got nervous. " You think Twilight and Rarity will be fine with me going alone?"

" Alone? Hell no. Though if you were to have someone go with you?" I gave him a smile telling him that I had his back. " I'll pick you up at eight. Have a pack ready with some food and any other essentials you might need for the trip."

" I'll do it now." He went up the stairs to start packing for the trip for tomorrow. Hopefully, it goes better than our last trip.

The next day.

I waited outside the library with my truck packed with the essentials, food, blankets, and of course beer. When I got home the other night, I told my wives that I would accompany Spike to the dragon lands so he could find himself. They agreed on the condition that we are back within a week, the boys really hate it when I'm gone for too long. While I was fiddling with my necklace I heard the door open. Out from the door came Spike with Twilight, Dash, and Rarity right behind him.

" Be careful Spike, and behave yourself while you're with Joe, alright." Twilight then directed her attention to me. " And you mister, you better keep your eyes on him."

" Geez Twi cut the umbilical cord. The reason he's doing this is so he can feel more macho." I went ahead and put Spike's bag in the back seat of the truck then gave my attention towards the three mares at the door. " Don't worry, I'll watch Spike as if he were my own."

" You just bring him back in one piece, I planned a date for us and I would very much like him to be on time for it."

" You hear that Spike, no trip to Vegas afterward." I flashed them a grin and proceeded to the driver's seat while Spike got in the front. " Don't worry Rares, with any luck, we'll be back in three days." I started the truck and started following the scent of a thousand or so dragons. " Auf wiedersehen, we'll bring back souvenirs." And just like that, we were on our way to another whirl-wind big city adventure.

https://youtu.be/_mFxUIH5IaE

As we left the library behind, I couldn't help the forced smiles those three were giving us as we left. ( What are those three up to? Eh, doesn't matter.) " So Spike, have found out anything about your kind, or do you still know what you already know?"

" Twilight and I went through every beast and naturalist book we had, and all we found out is that I'm a fire-breathing lizard. I think this will really help find out who I am."

" Spike, finding out what you are, doesn't define who you are. I mean, I'm a werewolf, like my father and ancestors before me. But that doesn't mean we act the same." I turned the music down a bit to give him some more sage wisdom. " Listen, a person isn't defined by what he is, or who they are associated with, but by what they do with their lives that define who they are."

" Wow, that's some heavy stuff man."

" I heard it on an episode of Touched by an angel."

" Whatever, can you toss me a beer?" I reached into the cooler and gave him a cold one while I ripped a piece of jerky for the both of us. " Thanks."

We kept on driving through rough terrain and mountain ranges. When it was lunch-time, we stopped at the top of a hill and smoked a deer that stumbled onto our little camp. With our bellies full, we pressed on towards the dragon lands. After crossing a forest, we made it to a large dormant volcano that was swarmed with dragons. " It would seem that we've made it."

We parked the truck by some bushes in case someone walked by it and decided it was something worth taking. " This place looks incredible!"

" Yeah, if you like the whole Muspelheim look." We started up the fire-mountain to see what all the dragons were doing up there. A few times I had to help spike get to the lip of the mountain cause he kept sliding down. We eventually made it to the top where we found a few dragons resting on the lip of the volcano, unfortunately, one of the dragons saw us. " Oh shit!" The dragon reared it's head and blasted us with fire. With no time to spare, I covered Spike with my wings and body, receiving the full brunt of the flames. " Aaaaaarrrrggghh!!!" Once the flames died, my back was scorched and the feathers on my wings were burnt to a crisp.

" Sweet Celestia, Joe, are you alright!?"

With a little grunting, I tore off my AC/DC concert shirt and looked over myself. " Well, my back will heal in a few seconds, though I think my wings are out of commission for a while." With the spell that Luna taught me, I magically hid my wings for the time being. " There, like nothing ever happened." With one problem solved, I took a look around the volcano and found a group of smaller dragons in the center of the volcano dome, most likely teenagers. " What say we go down there? Maybe they'll be more talkative, less fire-spewing you know."

" I guess we can try, you think they'll be any trouble?"

" Well, if they are, I brought along Frostbite just in case." I flashed my ax to illustrate my point.

" You named your weapon?" He looked at me as if I've lost it.

" Well, I can't just keep calling it my ax. Besides, all my ancestors had a weapon that they used and named." He seemed to understand and nodded his head. " Alright, let's go." We skidded our way down the volcano and towards the group of dragons, who were fighting at the moment. " I got twenty bits on the red one."

This got the attention of the group and the one I believe is the leader came up to us. " Look what we got here boys. A little wimpy dragon, and a hairless ape." This got the group of dragons to laugh like a bunch of drunk college students who just did something stupid. " So what are you two butt heads doing here?"

" Well, he wanted to learn somethings about his own kind, and so far it doesn't look very good." I gave every dragon there a disapproving look, though it didn't really seem to affect them. " And as for me, I came along to compare this world's dragons to mine. And of course to make sure no one harrases my nephew here." The group seemed to be shocked that I was related to him. This is true, once Cadence marries Shinning, he, as well as Twilight and Spike, become my niece and nephews. " You overgrown geckos have a problem with that?"

The insult did not go over well with them. The fat brown dragon came over and grabbed me by the arm. " Who do you think you are, coming in here and calling us names like that. I ought to-" He would have continued his thought, had I not grabbed him by the throat and lifted him up in the air.

" Listen well you slack-jawed imbeciles because it might just save your life." Now I had their attention. Since they don't seem to know my name, I might as well go with an alias. " I am ripper, terror, slasher, gouger. I am the teeth in the darkness, the talons in the night. Mine is strength and lust, and power. I! Am! Beowulf!" With the last word, I wolfed out in all my glory and dug my claws into his throat. " Now, how about we start over and introduce ourselves?"

The red one regained his senses and went to introduce themselves. " Uh, well, I'm Garble." He pointed over to a thin purple dragon with blonde hair. " That guy over there is Fume." He waved with a nervous smile. " And the guy in your claw is Clump."

I gave them all a raised eyebrow. " And here I thought pony names were strange." I put the dragon down and he went over to his friends, lightly coughing from the lack of air. " As I've said, my name is Beowulf, and this is my nephew, Spike. And we came here, so he can learn a little about what it means to be a dragon. Think you can help with that?"

The purple one, Fume, finally answered. " Yeah, we can teach him all we know. I think the first thing we should do, is a roaring contest."

" I can do that, watch. Rawr." We all looked at him as if what he did was a joke.

" Why don't you try that again, this time put some effort into it." When no one was looking, I magically enhanced his vocal cords so he'd have a better roar.

" Alright, here we go." He took in a deep breath, and then he let it all loose. " Roooooaaaaarrrrrrr." After that he was given applause by the rest of the dragons. With them distracted, he came over to whisper in my ear. " Thanks, Joe, I owe you one."

" Don't mention it, little buddy." In the moments proceeding, the other dragons went and took their turns in the contest. After they all took their turns, they gestured for me take a crack at it. " Alright, step back everyone." They all gave me a wide berth while I took in a deep breath and let it loose. " Roooooooaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrr." They were all blown away by my roar, that they couldn't even move for some time. A minute passed before the whole crowd of dragons went wild and started praising my name. " Thank you, thank you. Please, you're embarrassing me."

When the cheering died down, Garble came over to us. " That was a nice roar, I'll give you that. But I believe it's time for the next contest." He led me and Spike over to a pile of treasure piled high. " It's time for. King of the horde! No wings while competing." He then flew to the top of the pile and beat his chest in a challenge to all.

" Think we can take him?" instead of answering him, I picked him up and put him on my back, just after I wolfed out.

" I believe we can take him." And just like that, I started climbing up the pile. I t wasn't easy, climbing up a pile of loose jewels and other assorted valuables, but I made it work. It was when other dragons started trying to knock me off that I started to feel a real challenge. A few times, one of them would latch onto me and try to pull me off the pile, but that's where Spike came in, barbecuing the bastards before they could pull us off. Soon enough, we made it to the top where Garble waited for us. " Time to dethrone a king."

" In your dreams pal." We grappled at the top trying to push the other off the top. I could easily pick him up and throw him down, but then that would take the fun out of it. Eventually, Garble started biting my arm to get me to stumble. He broke the skin but wasn't able to puncture much further than that. " Come on dude, fall off!" As soon as he let go of my arm, Spike did a classic Moe Howard and poked him in the eyes. " Gah!" He slipped off the top but held on to the edge.

I looked down on him while he clung to the edge, thank Odin for the no wing rule. " Looks you could use some help buddy." I went and grabbed his wrists and made him look me in the face while I put on a creepy smile. " Long live the king." His pupils shrunk as the realization of what I was doing hit him. I let go of his wrists and watched him plummet to the bottom of the pile with the others. With him down, I made mine and Spikes victory known. " Hear me now you drakes of fire! Look upon the king and prince of the horde with fear and awe!" I then outstretched my hands and let loose a torrent of blue flames stretching a good twenty feet. The other dragons were amazed by this, even some of the adults seemed impressed.

" Joe, you really need to cut down on the theatrics. We might get unwanted attention." I looked to the rim and saw that some of the adults looked like they were going to come down and take care of us, though a few looked frightened especially the one that went and torched my back.

" Okay, for your sake I'll take it down a notch." I jumped down to the bottom and went over to Garble. " So, what's next?"

After his eyes stopped rolling around in his head, he got up and gestured us over to a pool of lava. " The one who can make the biggest splash wins."

I looked down at the lava and realized this was one contest I couldn't participate in. I set Spike down on the ground and patted him on the back. " You're on your own for this one Spike." I went over to a nearby rock and pulled a cigar from my pocket and lit it with my thumb. " Try not to hurt yourself alright."

" No promises." He stood by the other dragons as they each took a turn splashing into the pool. When it came time for Spike to take his turn, the other dragons started heckling him even going as far as calling him half pony. This, of course, got him pissed off and made him unclear of his actions to where he completely messed up and belly-flopped into the lava. I went to the edge of the high dive to see Spike resurface to applause. " Wait, I thought the point was to make a huge splash?"

" True, but any dragon who can survive a flop like that is more dragon than a pony that's for sure." The other dragons held Spike up high as they cheered for him.

I came down to the edge of the pool and waved them over. " Hey listen, I'm going to go and get some celebratory drinks for this occasion. Can I count on you to watch him while I go get them?"

" Sure. Take your time we'll keep an eye on him." Garble held Spike under his arm while giving him a noogie.

I gave him a raised eyebrow, not knowing if he'd keep his word or not. " Okay, I'll be back in a few minutes, don't do anything stupid while I'm gone." I left them to their own little celebration as I headed out of the volcano and towards my truck. It was getting dark when I got close to my truck I heard some rustling in the bushes as well as some very familiar voices.

" Rarity, that disguise won't fool anybody. It has way too many gems on it." That definitely sounded like Dash.

" Now Rainbow Dash, the gems are meant to be a representation of a dragon's horde that it sleeps in. Not to mention that it looks absolutely fabulous." There's no mistaking Rarity.

" It doesn't have to be good looking, as long as they don't see through the disguise, we'll be fine." And there's Twilight. I pulled back the bushes to see those three getting into a ridiculous looking costume. " Now hurry up before anyone spots us."

" Too late." All three of them jumped at the sound of my voice. " What are you three doing here? This is supposed to be a journey of self-realization for Spike."

" We understand that, but we wanted to make sure for ourselves. You know how dangerous dragons can be."

" To be honest, we've been hanging with the teenage dragons and they've been acting like a bunch of drunk college students around pledge week, and even that's pretty tame." I then folded my arms and leered at them. " Also, are you doubting my skills in keeping Spike safe and in my sight?"

" Well, if you're so good at keeping an eye on Spike, where is he?" ( Shit, Dash's got me there.)

" I uh, left him with some new dragon friends while I went to get some drinks." All of a sudden I heard flapping wings from above us. When I looked up, I saw Spike being carried away by Garble, Fume, and Clump. " And that would be them up there."

" Dear Celestia! Where are they taking my Spikey!?"

" Joe, Dash, fly after them before something bad happens to him." I undid my wings and was about to get airborne, but I wasn't going anywhere. " Joe, what's wrong?"

" It's my wings, they were burnt and still haven't healed properly." If I can't follow them in the air, I can still follow their scent. " Girls, get in the truck, we're following them." We all got in the truck, leaving behind that stupid costume, and followed the three nitwits to where ever they're taking Spike. " When I get a hold of him, I'm going to skin his hide and wear it as armor."

" Joe, there's no need to be so violent, after all, they are just teenagers." Twilight might have a point, not to mention I still have the skin from that slain dragon I still need to do something with. " Where do you think they're going to anyway?"

I stuck my head out the window and sniffed at the air. " I don't know where exactly, but they are slowing down." I slowed the truck down as the scent of sulfur and cupcakes got stronger. I slowed the truck down to a stop and we followed them on foot. After a bit of searching, we found Spike holding an egg while those three idiots went after a family of phoenixes. It looked like he was about to do something to the egg, so I went over there to stop him. " Spike, what are you doing with that?"

" I...I don't know. Garble said we were going to a dragon raid, and he and his friends told me about this phoenix nest that they passed by. When we got to the nest, they went for the nest while I distracted the parents. When it seemed they had me, they turned around to help their babies. When I got back, I found this egg all alone."

I went over to Spike to try and tell him he doesn't have to do this, but that's when the stooges arrived. Their faces were scorched and they had splinters on their bodies. Twilight, Rarity, and Dash went behind some bushes so they wouldn't be seen. Garble went up to Spike, smiling that he had the egg. " Dude, you stole a phoenix egg? I guess this raid wasn't so bad after all." He then spotted me and his voice got caught in his throat. " Oh, uh hey Beowulf. Did you get those drinks?"

" You know, it's funny. I believe I told you three to keep an eye on Spike while I get the drinks, not take him on a raid to I know not where." I put my hand on Spike's shoulder while I eyed those three. " Now answer me this." I pointed down to the egg clutched in Spike's claws. " What were you planning to do when you got ahold of this egg."

Clump answered this one. " We planned on smashing it on the ground." He seemed very happy about what they were going to do, at least until he saw my frown, then he started having second thoughts. " Uh, I'm guessing you don't like that idea?" ( What gave it away?)

" Hey, if Spike wants to know what it's like to be a real dragon, then he'll smash that egg! Or we'll smash both the egg and his face." Garble emphasized his point by poking Spike in the chest, knocking him over onto his back. I was about to do something, but that's when our friends decided to make their presence known. " What the?"

Our friends got into attack positions around Spike and put their game faces on. " Nobody's gonna lay a claw on him!" Dash tried looking fierce as she hovered in the air.

" That's right!" Twilight had her hooves up like a boxer would, ready to attack any who laid a hand on Spike.

" Fightings not really my thing, I'm more into fashion. But I'll rip you to pieces if you touch one scale on my boyfriend's cute little head!" Rarity turned berzerk on that.

When the introductions were made, the trio of dragons just started laughing at the three ponies trying to look fearsome. This raised Dash's ire even further. " Why the hell are you laughing?"

" Because this puny little shrimp not only has pony friends but that he actually fell for a pony is just pathetic." I couldn't take that standing and pinned him against a tree. " Oww, what's your problem? What, your friends with ponies too?"

" As a matter of fact, yes I am. Not only that, I have two beautiful wives at home that are ponies, who have barred me, two sons. And if you got a problem with that." I wolfed out on him while brandishing my ax and stretching my now healed wings. " Then you can die by my blade."

He was indeed afraid and tried to reason with me. " You can't kill us, we're dragons." This just got me to laugh in his face like a mad-man. " You honestly think you can take all three of us?"

" Listen, close boy. Many moons ago I took something from a full-grown dragon's horde. The dragon was not pleased that I took something from him, and so he tried to kill me." The pupils in the dragon's eyes started shrinking as realization started dawning on them. " When our fight came close to endangering others, I pulled out his still-beating heart, at ate it as the life left his eyes." Garble was now shaking violently in my grasp once he realized that the hands that now hold him, has shed the blood of his kind. " So don't even think for a second that three immature whelps such as yourselves, even stand a chance against me."

I then threw Garble at his companions and readied my ax. " Now, leave me and my friends, and never let me hear of you harassing the young ever again." Not even attempting to answer, they quickly turned tail and fled back to the mountain of fire. I went back over to Spike and the girls to find Rarity comforting Spike as he held the egg. " You doing alright Spike?"

" Yeah, I'm alright. I guess we learned that dragons are real jerks." He held his head low after saying that, luckily Dash came with some words of comfort.

" Those three were jerks, but I know that not all dragons are jerks. And do you know how I know that." Spike looked up at Dash awaiting her answer. " Because I know you, and you are not a jerk." She gave Spike a reassuring smile and hug which he returned.

" Rainbow Dash is right, you may not act like other dragons, but that does not mean you're any less of a dragon. If anything, it makes you even more of a dragon, a very Noble dragon." Rarity then kissed Spike on the cheek to drive her point home.

" You guys really think I'm a Nobel dragon?"

" Since the day you were hatched, I've always known you were great." Twilight then joined in on the group hug that surrounded Spike, encasing him in a ball of pony fur.

" Alright, enough sap. Let's get the hell out of here and go home." They all agreed and started heading to the truck. As I followed them, I couldn't help but notice that Spike still had the egg with him. ( Eh, I guess Spike can do with a pet too.)

Author's Notes:

Alright, here's my second shot at giving an image of my character.
Here he is. Hope you can see him.

If you can't, then all I can do is give you this clip.

https://youtu.be/YWmwAdK48vg

Now, I believe it's time for a royal wedding.