Prelude

In the following weeks that led up to the present, only three events are worth telling about.

In the week after our trip to the dragon lands, a call out for all pegasi, and by extent me, were told to help out in creating a tornado to get the water in the reservoir, up to Cloudsdale. On the day of the tornado, we were short a dozen or so Pegasi including Fluttershy, who at the moment was dealing with her fear of being judged because of her weak flying skills. On our first attempt at the tornado, it was too weak to lift all the water and we wound up in a splashdown. On the second attempt, however, Fluttershy came to the rescue. We didn't break any records, but we were able to get the water up to Cloudsdale. I had this idea to swim to the bottom and teleport the water to Cloudsdale, but then I'd be stealing a lot of ponies thunder.

Three weeks after that, ponies started getting addicted to the Foal Free Press thanks to a gossip column written by Gabby Gums. At first, it was funny with harmless gossip, then it started getting nasty. It started when the gossip got more personal about others in their private moments. It got even worse when they caught a glance of me feeding the boys their first taste of meat due to their teeth finally growing in. The picture caused a massive panic when the column said it was pony meat, instead of deer meat. The madness calmed down once Rarity found out that it was the Crusaders who were posing as Gabby Gums. When no one would pay attention to them, they wrote a public apology to the town as well as give their resignment. They were forgiven and life went on, though I did warn them to be careful about doing stuff like that again.

Four days after that, I was asked to escort Pinkie and the others up to Canterlot with this huge fucking cake for a dessert contest. I swear Celestia came up with this so she can get her sweet tooth fix. The problem was, sometime during the night, someone took a few chunks out of the cake that the cakes had made, ruining the cake. After an episode of Sherlock, we found out that the culprits of this crime were none other than Dash, Fluttershy, and Rarity. When Pinkie advertised how delicious the other competitor's desserts were, they all went and ate each other's desserts. With the remainder of the sweet treats, they combined them into something an eight-year-old would create if they had free access to a candy shop, tasted pretty good though.

Now we head to the present.

I was enjoying a picnic with my family and friends on a hill just outside of ponyville. It was a nice day, and I was watching my boys take their very first steps. " Come on boys, come to daddy." They've grown so much since they were born. It's true that the wolf lets us mature faster than a normal person, but I think with the addition of alicorn powers, their growth spurt is going through the roofs. They were both walking from their mothers to me as best they could for their first time. So far, Orion was in the lead with Jack nipping at his heels. " That's it you can do it, just a little further."

" Oooh, those two are just the cutest, and it's amazing how fast their growing."

" Ah know, pretty soon they'll be toddler size and they're not even a year old." Jackie was really proud of how our sons were developing into fine young men. " Hey, look what Jack's doing." We all watched as Jack started using wings for the first time and gaining a bit of lift. With a little more effort he passed Orion and went right into my arms, followed by his brother.

Luna came over to the boys and cuddled them. " Oh, their first steps and Jack's first flight, Mommy is so proud of you two." The boys hugged Luna's neck as she praised them for their first steps.

" This calls for a celebration!" Pinkie pulled out her party cannon and shot confetti all over the area. We all cheered for each of my sons' success and I held them up high. " Hey, where's Spike? He should be celebrating this too."

" He's at the library, reshelving the return books but he said he'd be here as soon as possible." She went for a piece of pie until we all heard a set of claws running up to us. When we looked for the source, we saw Spike running to us at full speed, panting heavily. " Spike, we were just talking about you."

He made it over to Twilight and was about to say something to her, but then he got a message. " Buuuurrrppp!"

" Nice one." Twilight took the letter and started reading it. " What's it say Twi?"

She read through the letter and looked up to tell us what it was. " This is kinda weird. It's a list of tasks for a royal wedding and each one of us has a job to do."

" A royal wedding! Don't leave us in suspense. What do we have to do?" Geez, calm down, it's just a wedding.

" It says that Celestia will preside over the ceremony as per usual. For the music, she would like Fluttershy and her songbird choir to provide it."

" Oh, my goodness what an honor." She softly spoke with glee.

" Pinkie Pie, I can think of no one more qualified than you to host the reception." Shit, she just opened the flood-gates.

" Hip! Hip! Hooray!" With every word, she cartwheeled onto something on our picnic, including the cake.

" Applejack, my dear sister-in-law, you will be in charge of the catering for the reception." ( Oh hell yes! Certainly, have some good food there.)

Jackie took Jack in her hooves and spoke to him. " Did ya hear that honey? Momma's gonna help with a big wedding." She tickled Jack's belly with her hoof as Twilight went along with the list.

" Rainbow Dash." Dash took a big yawn as she thought the task assigned to her was going to be boring. " I would very much appreciate it if you could perform a sonic rainboom, as the bride and groom complete their I dos."

Dash had her hoof in her mouth at this unexpected surprise. " Yeeeesss!"

" Rarity, you will be responsible for designing the dresses for the bride and her bridesmaids." ( Take cover!)

" Princess Celestia wants me to, dah wah, wedding dress, oooh, for a Canterlot wedding, ooooh weee." ( Flop) Rarity passed out on the grass from the news that she was asked to create a few dresses for a royal wedding.

" Joe, my dear brother-in-law. I would very much appreciate it if you would provide twenty of your best warriors for additional security around the castle. I would also like it if you and Spike would help plan the bachelor party as per the groom's request." Twilight was a bit surprised by that first request. " Why would she ask you to bring warriors Joe?"

" Well it is a royal wedding, so additional security would be best. Besides, you remember what was going to happen at mine, Jackie and Lulu's wedding?" She pondered that in her head for a bit seeing the logic in there. " Is that all?"

" Ahh, no. She would also like for you to tell Luna to meet her the night we arrive for the preparations."

" Hmm, I wonder what she want's to talk about?"

Twilight went back to the letter. " And as for you Twilight, you will be playing the most important role of all, making sure that everything goes as planned. See you all very soon, Princess Celestia." She stopped reading the letter and looked it over a few times, seeing if there was more to it. " But, I don't understand. Who's getting married?"

Spike just had himself a sudden revelation. " Oh, right, I was probably supposed to give you this first." He handed Twilight a letter that he most likely burped out first, probably why he ran here in the first place.

Twilight took the letter in her magic and started reading it. " Princess Celestia cordially invites you to the wedding of Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and ( Gasp) my brother?" She was surprised to hear her brother was getting married. I don't know why. She knew he was engaged to Cadence. Maybe it has something to do with the fact that she was told through a piece of paper?

Jackie went and broke the awkwardness. " Shining's getting married, that's great news, congratulations Twi." Instead of being excited about the news, she just walked over to the other side of the picnic looking pissed. " You alright Twilight? I would think hearing about your brother's wedding would be a good thing."

" Oh yeah, it is, it's just that I would have liked to be told by him and not by a wedding invitation! I mean really he couldn't tell me personally." She went and levitated my deer meat sandwich over to her, and made it into a puppet. " Hey, Twilight. I just thought you should know I'm making a life-changing decision that changes everything. Oh, nevermind, you'll hear about it when you get the invitation." She put down the sandwich which I quickly grabbed back. " And to a Princess Mi Amore Cadenza. Who the hell is that? I thought he was engaged to Cadence?"

Luna and I looked at each other as if she lost her mind. " Um, Twilight, you know Cadenza and Cadence, are the same right?"

Twilights eyes went from anger to realization, then to absolute joy. " Oh my gosh, Cadence. Wait, that's her title?" Anger can really scramble the brain. " Whatever, it still doesn't excuse him for telling me this important information through a letter, instead of in person."

" At least it's not as bad as receiving it through text. Here, why don't you discuss this with him when we get to Canterlot. When's the wedding anyway?"

She took another look at the invitation for the date. " It'll be in four days."

" More than enough time to chew out his ass. Now come on, the sooner we get there, the sooner I can call you two, family." I pointed to both Spike and Twilight before helping to put away the picnic.

Once it was put away I went back to the house with the boys while Luna and Jackie went to the train station with the others. When I got to the house I found dad and Discord watching The Hangover. " Hey boys, how was the picnic?"

" It was alright, though it got really interesting when Spike delivered an invitation to Shining and Cadence's wedding. You two think you can watch the kids while we help with the prep?"

" Of course, I never seem to spend enough time with my grandsons anyway. When do we come up for the wedding?"

" You and the boys can come up to Canterlot in four days, Discord, however, is coming up with us."

" And why would I do that? If you haven't already guessed, Celestia is still distrusting of me. Not to mention I can't stand the snobbery of those uptight nobles." He does bring up a good point. But this will change his mind.

" Because Spike and I need your help with the Bachelor party." Not even a second went by before he flashed over to my side wearing a Hawaiian shirt and drinking helmet. " That's what I thought. Head over to the train station with the others, I'll be there in a moment." He left in a flash while I headed for Herot for additional security.

https://youtu.be/x9j6DE6RnSk

I was on the train with the others, striking up both meaningful and useless conversations with everyone. In the train car behind us, housed twenty of my elite Ghost Warriors all huskies. They each carried a spear, a steel club, a paracord sling, and an assortment of throwable bombs from incendiary to gas.

Currently, Spike and I were going over our plans for Shining's bachelor party with Discord until he noticed something. " Since when did Canterlot have a giant purple shield around it?" We all looked out the windows to see that there was indeed a large dome shield over the entire city. " Do you think, it'll let us through?"

" We're about to find out." The train got closer to the shield wall and was about to hit it until the area around the tracks started to shimmer thus letting us through. " I guess that answers that." As we got close to the station I went over to Twilight. " Hey Twi, you want to come with me while I hand the troops over to Shining?"

" Yes. He needs to know just how pissed off I am."

I grabbed my suitcase just as we pulled in to the station. When the doors opened, Twilight and I went over to the car behind us just as my warriors started filing out. When they saw me, they got into formation. " Warriors! Prepare to Move out!" As they waited to move at my command, Luna came over with Jackie and all their luggage. " I'm going to take Twilight and my warriors over to Shining and I'll meet you two later tonight."

" Okay, I need to meet up with Tia for the task she was so vague with anyway." She gave me a kiss on the cheek and left for the castle with the luggage.

" I'll head over to the kitchens and start on the food, see what they need to be improved on." She kissed me on the other cheek before following Luna to the castle.

I watched them go off in the distance just as I was about to address my company. " Warriors! March!" In unison, they headed for the main gates while I turned to Twilight. " You have no idea how much I love that." Twilight and I headed for the barracks where I was certain we would find Shining. As the march continued, we would pass by some of the locals who would either wave, look away, or just plain run away. " You'd think after a few months of this, they'd be used to me."

" I would have thought so too." We made it to the castle barracks where we saw the guards going through some pretty slack drills. While I was observing these slackers, Twilight spotted her brother giving orders on top of the barrack wall. " There he is." She stormed over to the wall to give him a verbal thrashing. " I've got something to say to you, mister."

This got the attention of both Shining and the guards. Just as the first guard was about to go full-on combat mode, Shining defused the situation. " Twilly, Joe, it's good to see you guys again." He came down the steps, took off his helmet and came in for an embrace. When he went to hug Twilight she backed away. " Twilight what's wrong?"

" Oh, nothing. Just that I'm finding out about my own brothers wedding through the mail at short notice, instead of in-person with plenty of time to prepare." She was fuming every word she spoke at this point. " I mean come on. I'm your sister for Celestia's sake."

" Twilight, I'm sorry it had to be that way, but things have been a little chaotic lately." And that's when Discord showed up.

" None of that was my fault, I can assure you of that." Not wanting to deal with his crap at the moment, I grabbed him by the throat and meet him eye to eye. " I can see that this is a bad time. I'll see you at dinner." He disappeared to who knows where while Shinning continued his explanation for the short notice invitation.

" Anyway, Celestia requested a major increase in security, if you haven't noticed already." Looking around, we noticed that every wall and tower had at least one guard covering the place.

" Yeah, we noticed there's a big wedding coming up. Maybe you heard about it?" Twilight went over to a puddle to distract herself from her brother. Shining just came right over.

" The security has nothing to do with the wedding. A threat has been made against Canterlot."

" A threat has been made against the capitol, and I wasn't told about it until now?"

" We didn't want to bother you with it back then. But now Celestia thinks that you need to be involved."

" And this shield over the city isn't enough?" I pointed up to the shield above and around us.

" Sometimes it is, but every time I cast the spell to renew the shield, it leaves me with terrible migraines." To emphasize his point, he blasted the shield above with a beam from his horn, making it brighter and possibly more solid. When he was done he grunted in pain and started rubbing his forehead. " See what I mean? The safety of Canterlot rests squarely on my shoulders, so this has been my top priority for some time."

As we stopped along an archway, Twilight found a little forgiveness. " Okay, I get it. You got a really important job protecting Canterlot with a force-field that only you can conjure up. But still, how could you not tell me about something as big as your wedding? Am I not that important to you anymore?" Oh, gods here come the waterworks.

" Of course you're important to me, you're my little sister. And I would completely understand it if you didn't want to be my best mare." He gave Twilight an innocent-looking smile hoping to get back in her good graces. From the look of her smile, I think it's working.

" I would be honored to be your mare of honor." They exchanged a nice sibling hug, patching things between them.

While they had their moment together, I caught a whiff of something. The smell was very strong and smelled of cilantro, and it was right behind me. When I turned around to find who it was, I was met by my niece Cadence. I was happy to see her after so long, however, she looked surprised, even scared to see me. I thought it was strange that she recoiled from the sight of me, though I didn't have to worry about that once Twilight caught sight of her.

" Cadence!" She came over and started their childhood greeting. " Sunshine sunshine ladybugs awake. Clap your hooves and do a little shake." She sang her song and ended her dance with her flank in the air.

Cadence just looked at Twilight with a neutral expression. " What are you doing?" Now that was weird. I've seen them do this every time they meet, now she doesn't even recognize the gesture? Something is really off about this.

Twilight got out of that position and looked quizzically at her. " Cadence, it's me, Twilight."

She kept looking at her with the same expression. " Yeah, okay." She walked right past us and straight to Shining.

Since this was getting a bit weird for me, I decided to go about my duty. " Listen, I'm gonna give my soldiers their orders, and then I'm gonna meet up with my Valkyries. Kay?" They were to caught up with their own world to really listen, so I decided to just do it.

I reached my warriors who stood at attention. " Alright listen up maggots! I want all of you to scout the city and protect it from any threat. Be it terrorist level or petty thievery, I want it stopped and reported to Princess Celestia. Do you get me!?"

" We get you, Sir!"

" Dismissed!" As they left to go about the city, my thoughts went back to Cadence's strange behavior. " Kamehameha! Front and center!" One of the warriors stopped in his tracks and came to me. This warrior was the biggest in the group and killed the most caribou out of all of my army. He had a black coat with a white underbelly and a scar going across his left eye. " I have a special task for you."

" What is it, my king?"

I pointed over to Cadence, who was cuddling up to Shining at the moment. " I want you to keep an eye on the pink one, but make sure you are not seen by her." He nodded in understanding. " If she does anything out of the ordinary, report it to Twilight. Understand?"

" I shall not fail you my king." He then crossed his arm over his chest. " Respekt und Ehre!"

I returned the salute. " Respekt und Ehre!" He left to do what he was asked, and I went for the throne room.

As I moved through the halls, I would pass a guard on alert every ten-feet, though some of them looked out of it. When I got to the doors to the throne room, I was let in by two guards. When I entered, I saw Luna talking with Celestia, no doubt about the task that she was so vague with. " Joe, so glad you could make it."

" It's good to see you to Sis." I came over and gave her a hug but not before giving my wife a kiss. " I have my warriors scouting from the shadows. If anything strange or dangerous happens in the city or outside the barrier, they'll inform you if they can't stop it themselves."

" Thank you, Joe it means a lot that you help with the security around the city. With both the wedding and an enemy threatening to invade Canterlot, I don't think I could have done this without help." She gave me a gracious smile, telling me that she really needed the help.

" You are most welcome, though I must ask. How did you know a threat was coming to Canterlot anyway?" Out from behind her throne, she levitated over an envelope. She brought it over to me where I began to read it. ' To the soon to be ex-ruler of Equestria. This is to let you know that a better ruler is on its way to take control. The army that comes is hungry for battle. See you soon.' I gave her back the letter and looked at them both. " What kind of enemy sends a letter saying they're going to attack? This is the stupidest thing anyone could ever do."

" That's what I told her when I read it. Does the term ' Surprise attack' mean nothing in this day and age?" Gods I love it when Luna shows her military side.

" They may very well have. I mean, there hasn't been a conflict in the last thousand years, so there was no need to worry until now." Luna and I gave Celestia a disapproving look. " What?"

" Back in my world, we have a saying. Qui Pacem, Para Bellum. Those who seek peace, prepare for war." I gave Luna a kiss on the cheek before heading out. " I'll see you two at dinner." And just like that, I was out.

The next morning.

It was now three days before the wedding, as well as the day the guys and I, were taking Shining to his bachelor party. We decided to teleport to my world and head over to Las Vegas for the groom's last hoorah before marriage. At first, the guys had some reservations about going over to the other side, till I told them about the disguise spell, then they couldn't wait to get going.

As I was packing an overnight bag, I was going over the reports the Huskies had given me. As far as the shield perimeter, nothing has tried to get in that the train didn't allow through. From the inside, two of my warriors stopped a robbery at a jewelry store downtown while one of them stopped a domestic disturbance. So far not bad, though I wasn't really interested in that. What I was interested in, was what Kamehameha had to report about Cadence and her weird behavior.

He reported that she would always have the smell of cilantro on her, no matter what she did. He assumed she got the scent when she went into the kitchen, but when she came out the strength of the scent didn't grow nor did it weaken throughout the day. Aside from her scent, her attitude towards others has been most unusual as well. She would act rudely towards the girls when all they did was help with the wedding. And he's not sure, but he thought he caught a glimpse of her in the mirror, though he thought he saw something else. I told him to keep watch and see what else he could find and report it to Celestia.

Anyway, my thoughts were on the trip ahead and having a good time. I grabbed my bag and met with the guys out front. The party consisted of Shining, Discord, Big Mac, Spike and me. " You guys ready for some fun?"

" Yeah! I can't wait to get going." Spike had a huge pack with him and he looked eager to get going.

" Alright, let me just get your disguises on, then we can go." I reached out my hand and waved it over the drake and two ponies. When I was done, they had a new look to blend in with my world.

They took a moment to look at their disguises and were quite impressed. " Not bad Joe. But what about Discord over there?" Mac asked while pointing with his new appendage.

" My dear Big Mac, I do not need help when it comes to fitting in with a crowd." With a snap of his fingers, he became a human, at least in the sense he could pass for one in Vegas.

Satisfied with how they all looked, I prepared to open a rift to Vegas. " Here we go!" With the slash of my claws, I opened a gateway to an alleyway next to the Ceasers Palace hotel and casino. " Well come on, we don't want anyone on that side to see the portal do we?" This made them high-tail it through the portal with me following. The portal closed once we all made it through and we headed towards Ceasers. " Welcome to my old world boys."

The guys looked all around them, seeing all the different themed casinos and weirdos on the street. That was quickly replaced once they started to feel the heat. " Dude, your world is to hot man."

" Yeah, Nevadas hot this time of year. But that's why we're going into an air-conditioned hotel, so we don't have to be out in this heat all day." I adjusted my pack and headed over to the front of the Palace with the guys following. Once we got in, we were hit with a blast of cool air. I led them to the front desk and rung for the receptionist.

A tall blonde with a ponytail came to the desk and greeted us. " Hi, my name is Lisa. Welcome to Caesars Palace. How may I help you today?"

" Yeah, we came to Vegas to give this bastard a bachelor party." I patted Shining on his shoulder, showing who we're here to celebrate for. " And we were wondering if you had any villas available?"

She went on her computer and started typing away. " We have one available, and it's forty-two-hundred a night." I fished out three gold bits from my pocket and tossed them onto the counter. " Okay, let me go and get your room keys." She took the coins and went to the back. A moment later, she came back out with five key cards. " Here you are. Enjoy your stay at the hotel."

We each took a card and went to the elevators. When we got to the top floor, we went down the hall towards the end where our room is. With my key card, I unlocked the door and opened it, revealing our suite. " Guys, welcome to Vegas!" The guys came into an amazing site.

We each picked a room and got ourselves cleaned up and ready for the nightlife. We all waited in the lobby while Spike was putting on the finishing touches to his ensemble. Needless to say, it was getting on Shining's nerves. " Come on little brother, we only got one night to be wild, and we're burning moon-light."

Spike came out with the same clothes he had on but with the addition of a red bowtie. " Ready to go!" We all gave him an unamused look at that. " What?"

I gave him a hard pat on the back. " Nothing. Come on, let's head up to the roof real quick, I have a treat for us." We left the room and went for the service entrance to the roof. As we stepped onto the roof, we were met with the Vegas skyline.

As the guys were admiring the lights, I took out a bottle of Jager and five-shot glasses from my jacket. " Alright, time for the first shot of the night." I distributed the glasses to the guys while also filling them up. " Down the hatch fellas." we raised our glasses and threw the first shot down our gullets. " By the gods that burned so good."

" Taste's like college." Shining gestured for another one. " Listen, I wanna say thanks for the party guys. This was a much better idea than going to some restaurant in Canterlot."

" Don't sweat it, big bro. It's the least we could do for you."

" I just hope ya'll do this for me when I decide to settle down with some beautiful mare." Big Mac exclaimed while I topped him off.

" If the author ever gets off his ass and really starts putting some words down we might." Discord went and looked off in the direction we weren't with the stink eye.

" Despite Discords antics, I would like to propose a toast." We lifted our once again filled glasses. " To Shining Armor and Princess Cadence. May you have all the happiness that marriage can give you." And with that, we poured our second shot of the night. " Now let's get fucking wasted!"

" Yeah!"

The next morning. 3rd person POV.

It was morning in the villa at Caesars Palace and it is here that we find the bachelor party aftermath. The table in the dining room was littered with beer cans and liquor bottles, stacked pyramid style. The hot-tub was filled with blow-up dolls, and even more empty cans. Up, on the chandelier, we find our friendly neighborhood Draconequus, sleeping off a hangover. Joe was half nude, sleeping on the floor next to the bathroom. Shining was nowhere to be seen, however, Big Mac was face down on the floor, with a bit of blood coming from his mouth.

On the far side of the room, Spike, who had no pants, was trying his best to get up, only to stumble backward and land on the pile of beer cans. The sound of the crash was enough to wake up Mac from his slumber, though not entirely. As Mac got off the floor and sat on the sofa, Spike made his way to the bathroom, accidentally stepping on a chicken that somehow got in. When the bathroom door closed behind him, he directed his hose toward the toilet and let it loose.

" Grrrrrrr." Spike, in his still drunken state, thought he heard a noise over to the right. He turned his whole body, while still pissing, to where he thought he heard a noise. What he saw was a large tiger, sitting in the middle of the bathroom floor, growling at him. Not even giving the jungle cat another thought, he went back to pissing in the toilet. " Roooarr."

The roar woke him up completely and he stopped his stream. " Ahhhh!" He ran out of the bathroom, tripping over Joe and waking him up.

" Gah, fuck man control yourself, man." Joe looked over to Spike only recoil once he saw he had no pants on. " For Odin's sake Spike, you're not a dragon right now, put on some pants."

" Joe, there is a tiger in the bathroom!" He yelled while pointing to the bathroom.

Mac, having regained some sense of where he was, wondered what was going on. " Spike, what are you talking about?"

" There's a jungle cat in the bathroom!" He repeated while hiding his junk with the shirt he still had on.

Joe untangled himself from the sheet he was covered in and went for the bathroom. " Don't worry about it alright. I'll go check it out." Joe went to the bathroom, despite the protests Spike was giving him and opened the door. He took a quick peek around and found that there was indeed a tiger in the bathroom. " Holy fuck, he's not kidding, there's a tiger in the bathroom." He exclaimed while closing the door.

In a daze, Big Mac argued: " There's no tiger in the bathroom."

" Yeah, there is, it's huge, gigantic." Spike was still freaking out over the bathroom situation.

Joe looked around the room while putting on a shirt. " For Heimdal's sake. Look at this place. I'm probably gonna have to give these guys a few extra coins for this shit." He sat down from across Mac and cupped his face in his hands.

Mac felt around his face, feeling that something was off. " Hey, Joe, am I missing a tooth?"

Joe went and took a closer look while Mac bared his teeth. " I can't....pffft oh gods."

Mac grabbed a silver platter from the table and gave himself a look. " Sweet Celestia. My front tooth, it's gone!"

Discord decided to wake up from the chandelier. " Ugh, what did we do last night?"

" Why are we not doing anything with the fact there is a tiger in the bathroom?"

" Spike I will deal with it in a minute, now would you please put some pants on, it feels a little weird that I have to ask twice." Spike went searching for a pair of pants While Joe went looking for someone who wasn't there. " Has anyone seen Shining? He's not in his room, plus his mattress is gone." After the announcement that Shinning was not in the Villa, the gang quickly sobered up and started looking around for him.

" You know, I think I know where he is." Discord went out the door with the others following him. Discord had led them to the rooftop where their adventure began. After a few minutes of searching, they found Shining attempting to throw his mattress over the side. " You know. I don't think the hotel would appreciate you throwing their furniture off the roof."

Shining turned to the others and got pissed off. " You sons of bitches!" He dropped the mattress and tackled Mac.

Joe's Pov

I was watching Shining and Mac wrestle on the roof while Discord shared his popcorn with me. " Guys, can we move this along, I would like to get back to my loved ones."

Shining stopped throttling Mac and pierced me with his angry gaze. " You fuckers left me on the roof!"

" Yes, we established that now can we go?"

" But what about the tiger in the bathroom? We can't just leave it for the hotel staff to worry about."

" Oh, you met Hobbes?" Each and every one of us turned to Discord wanting more answers. " What?"

" Are you saying that the tiger in the bathroom was put there by you? And you named him Hobbes!?" Not even wanting to deal with any more bullshit, I headed back down to our room. I gathered all our things and made my way to the lobby where I gave the keys to Lisa at the front desk, as well as a few extra coins for the damages. When no one was looking, I teleported myself back to the room to get the tiger and head back up to the roof. When the guys saw me back with the tiger, all but Discord took a step back. " You promise to take care of him? And make sure he doesn't eat any of the other pets?"

" Of course I will, only the best care for Hobbes." I released the cat and he immediately went over to Discord and pounced on him. " There's a good boy."

While Discord was playing with his new companion, I opened up a portal to the throne room of Canterlot. " Alright, let's get the fuck out of Nevada." As the guys went through to Equestria, I would dispell their human disguises with Discord removing his own. When I passed through the portal, I was greeted to the site of Cadence berating Shining for leaving.

" How could you just leave without telling me where you were going! What if I needed you?" Never have I seen Cadence so angry, and by the looks of everyone in the room, they've never seen this side of her either. " Next time, you come to me before you do anything with your friends!"

" I will." And with that, Shining slumped off to his duties with his tail between his legs.

I couldn't just stand there and do nothing. I went over to Cadence and made her face me. " Cadence, if you want to be mad at anybody, be mad with me alright. It was my idea to take him and the guys to Vegas and I should have told you beforehand."

Cadence looked at me with a bit of anger and I swore I saw her eyes turn green for a second, but it soon subsided into a neutral look. " Don't let it happen again!" She went around me and left towards her room.

I tried to make sense of what had just occurred, but then I was tackled by my two flying sons. "What the...you're both flying? And you're both here?"

Dad came up behind them downing some Advil. " Yeah, I figured I'd bring them up here so they can annoy you, instead of driving me up the wall." As dad left for his room, Luna and Jackie came in to see their sons had arrived.

" Orion! Jack! What are you two doing here? Did you miss us?" Luna came over and got Orion from me while Jack flew over to Jackie. " I see their flying skills have gotten better."

" Yeah, pretty soon they'll be trying out for the Wonderbolts with their aunt Dash. " Jackie told us while trying to keep Jack still. " So how was the bachelor party, Honey?"

" It would be a whole lot better if I could remember what we did. You should have seen the state of the room after we were done with it. Oh, and Big Mac lost a tooth." Both my wives rolled their eyes not even surprised that the guys and I made a mess of things. Though Jackie was a little surprised about Mac. " So what about here? Anything that would require my immediate attention?"

" Well, there is something Twilight wanted to tell you. Though from what she told both me and the girls, I think she's just being paranoid. I think you'll find her in her room." Jackie came over and kissed me on the cheek before following Luna to our room.

When they were out of sight, I headed over to Twilight's room to see what she wanted to tell me. As I passed through the halls I noticed the scent of two of my warriors up in the rafters. I signaled them that they were doing a fantastic job just as I reached the door that held my bookworm friend. I knocked on the door and asked: " Hey Twilight, whatcha wanna see me about?"

The door was flung open and Twilight grabbed me in her magical grasp, where she pulled me inside. " Did Cadence see you come in?"

" No. Why?"

Twilight started zipping around the room, going from the window to the door before bringing me in close. " I think something has happened to Cadence. I don't know if someone has hypnotized her or if she's doing this on her own accord. But what I do know, is that she is evil."

" You've noticed it too. Good...that means Kamehamea's work hasn't been for nothing."

" You mean you knew!? And you didn't tell anyone!?" It seems Twilight was a little pissed about that.

" I had my suspicions when we confronted her on the archway. Her behavior is abnormal, her attitude towards Shining is irregular, but what really seals the deal, is her scent." Twilight raised an eyebrow at that last remark. " You probably can't smell it, but ever since we got here, she's had the smell of cilantro on her and it has never left her. Also when I told her to lay off Shining for not being around, I think her eyes flashed acid green."

" That proves it then. Come on we got to tell the others." Before she could wait for my response, she teleported herself to where the others would be.

Seeing no need to rush I went out into the hallway to head back towards the throne room, only to be stopped by Cadence. " Oh, hey. Just passing through." She let me past her so I could confront Cadence about her strange....wait a minute. Before I could say or do anything else, I was hit in the head with something heavy and my vision turned black.

An undetermined amount of time later.

I don't know how long I've been out, or where I was, or what it was that Cadence hit me with, but I do know one thing, Cadence was this close to sharing Bluebloods fate. While I was thinking this, I was awoken from my blunt-forced nap by some kind of explosion. When I opened my eyes my vision was blurry and I could only hear a ringing noise. Suddenly, a purple blur went and attacked a pink blur at the other end of the room or wherever we were at. As I watched the two blurs, my hearing started coming back to me, and I was able to hear the faint noise of that stupid song that Cadence and Twilight would always sing. " Twilight. Cadence. Is that you?"

The two blurs then moved over to me, at which point my vision had been cleared and it was indeed Twilight and Cadence with me. When the got closer to me, it was revealed that I was glued five feet high to the wall with what looked like boogers. Hopefully, that's not really the case. " Joe, how did you get down here?"

Instead of answering Twilight, I locked eyes with Cadence. " Before I answer your question, I have to know if that's the real Cadence." She looked a little taken back and hurt that I would accuse her of anything. " First question. When did we meet?"

" We met at the Gala after you stopped the animals from the garden from rioting."

" Okay, what was the name of the film that I showed after the Hearths Warming play?"

" I think it was called ' A Christmas Story'? Yeah, that was it."

I gave her a smile for the last question " Alright, final question. What was your suggestion for me to get Luna and Jackie for Hearts and Hooves day?"

She looked shocked that I asked that and her cheeks became red. " I told you to get chocolate covered strawberries." I lifted my right eyebrow and gave her a smirk knowing that wasn't all she said. " And a....box of...condoms."

" Hahahahahahahahahaha. Alright, it's you, though I should have figured since you don't smell like cilantro anymore." As I started to calm down from my little joke, I took in the room we were in, which happened to be some sort of crystal cavern. " Where are we? And who's been posing as you all this time?"

" Before I found you two, the fake Cadence said we were in the crystal caverns beneath Canterlot. She told me that everyone had forgotten about this place's existence so we'd be stuck here forever." ( Sounds like the typical bad guy move.)

" I know who did this." Twilight and I listened for what Cadence was about to reveal. " Her name is Chrysalis. She's the queen of a race known as Changelings. She's also the one who sent out a threat against Canterlot." Thinking back on the letter and the fact the enemy changes form, made me realize the plan was actually clever. " Do you need help getting out?" Seeing that I was still bound to the wall, I flexed my muscles, breaking free of my bonds. " Never mind."

" Come on, we have to stop my brother from marring that monster." Seeing there was no time to delay, I slashed open a portal just outside the throne room where the wedding was being held but not before retrieving Frostbite.

On the other side of the doors, we could hear Celestia going over the ceremony. Time to pull another insane stunt. " Princess Cadence and Shining Armor. It is my great pleasure to pronounce you-"

I busted the doors open with my foot and pronounced: " I object!" The whole room was filled with nobles, our friends and my wives acting as bridesmaids. And they all had their eyes on me. " First off, you were going to have this wedding without me or Twilight? What the hell is up with that? But you know...that wouldn't be as bad if not for the fact that the wedding is being done. Without, the bride!"

The fake Cadence was shocked to see me, but she kept up her act despite everything. " What are you talking about? The bride is standing where she needs to be."

" Not true." Everyone gasped once they saw a second Cadence come up from behind me, along with Twilight. " That Cadence is an imposter!"

Jackie went and asked the question that was on everybody's mind. " I don't understand. How can there be two of them?"

" She's a Changeling. She takes the form of the pony you love and gains power by feeding off your love for them."

Luna made this stunning realization. " Oh. Like in that episode of Supernatural where Dean thought he had a son with an old flame he had. And they found out the children were being replaced by creatures of the same name." Luna's a natural when it comes to this stuff.

The Cadence at the altar had had enough of our crap and decided it was time to reveal herself. Her eyes turned bright green while a ring of green flames engulfed her. We all gasped at the horror that was happening before us as her skin became chitin, her feathery wings turned into insect wings, and her mane turned a sickly green. In short, she was hideous.

" Mwahahaha. Right you are Princess. And as Queen of the Changelings, it is my duty to find food for my subjects. Equestria has more love than any place that I have encountered. My fellow Changelings will be able to Devour so much of it. That we will gain more power, that we have ever dreamed of."

Cadence stood her ground towards the big bug. " They'll never get the chance! Shining Armors protection spell will keep them from ever reaching us!"

The Queen merely smirked at her accusations. " Oh I doubt that. Isn't that right..dear?" Her horn glowed green and Shining's eyes glowed green, he was definitely brain-washed. This action spurred Cadence to try and reach him, only for the queen to get in her way. " Ah ah ah. You don't want to back to the caves now. Do you?" She stepped back from her. " Ever since I took your place, I've been feeding off of Shining's love for you. Every moment, he grows weaker and so does his spell. Even now my minions are chipping away at it." Outside, I was able to hear the bodies of her subjects crashing into the ever-weakening shield. " Hahaha. He may not be my husband, but he is under my total control now. And, I'm sorry to say, unable to perform his duties as captain of the royal guard!"

I had enough of this crap. I stepped in-between Cadence and Twilight while brandishing Frostbite. " Shining may not be able to perform his duties as Captain. But as King of Herot." I slowly transformed into the wolf just as my warriors jumped down from the rafters overhead. When the Wolf was revealed, Chrysalis started to feel afraid. " I will see you fall this day." My wives and our friends went behind me just as I started making my way to that evil bitch.

As I got closer, the Queen's fear turned into an evil smirk. " If I fall, then so do your children." She reached with her magic and from behind a pillar, she brought out my sons who were fast asleep. The sight of them in the grasp of this oversized bug made me stop in my tracks while Luna and Jackie were horrified.

" Mah babies!"

" Foul creature, release our sons this instant!"

Their cries for our sons only made the Queen laugh while also awakening the boys from their slumber. A moment later, the shield holding back the bitch's army broke, letting the enemy terrorize the streets of Canterlot. I would have more worry for them, if not for the fact I heard their screams of pain once my warriors went into the fray. The Queen must have heard this too as her smile turned into a look of annoyance.

" It seems my minions are having a little difficulty in dealing with those mutts." She brought the boys close to her person and looked ready to drain them of their love. " Call off your troops, or your kids will be loveless husks." I went to do just that until I heard Chrysalis scream. I turned around to see that my boys had wolfed out and started attacking her throat and abdomen. They make me so proud. " Gah, filthy creatures."

I took this opportunity to tackle the Queen while Luna was able to grab the boys from her magical grasp. " You dare to use my children as leverage against your own demise." She started shaking in her own chitin. " Let's take this outside." I threw her out the nearest window and chased her down while my warriors followed to help the others. She recovered from being thrown out the window and started to flying away, spilling large amounts of blood as she went. As I gave chase, her subjects would fly in my path to stop me. Frostbite made short work of them. After about an hour of chasing her through the streets, I was able to pin one of her legs to a wall with a spear I burrowed from one of my subjects. " It's one thing to go after adults. But to go after the young, especially my children." I lifted her into the air by her throat and readied Frostbite. " Just bought you a one-way ticket to Hell."

Just as I was ready to bring the ax down, a large dome forming from the castle, started expanding and pushing the Changelings out of Canterlot. I looked to Chrysalis with anger as my chance to end her was being robbed from me. " I see or smell you or your kind ever again. I will not hesitate to remove your lives from this world." I grabbed her midsection and threw her like a javelin away from the city, with the dome giving her an extra push. With all the Changelings gone, my warriors and I returned to everybody else.

When we returned, I was tackled by my wives. " I'm so proud that you saved the youngins, and stopped that evil bitch."

" Not to take credit away from you my love, but we can't forget our son's first transformations." The boys were on Lunas back where they kept going from normal to their wolf form.

I grabbed them both in my arms and praised them. " My boys first wolf-out, this is every werewolf father's happiest moment. Nothing can make this better."

" Dada."

" Dada."

The whole throne room went deadly silent after hearing those words. " I stand corrected. Their first words, and it was Dada! This is the best day ever!" I looked to see that everyone, other than my wives, were not as agreeing. " Despite some hiccups, it wasn't that bad."

The next day.

After some time redoing the wedding plans and cleaning up the bodies, thankfully it was just the enemies, we were ready to have a redo on this wedding. Seeing as it was me who took care of most of the invaders, I was given the honor of Marring Shining and Cadence to each other. Among the witness' to the wedding sat dad, the Apple family, and my boys as well as Kamahemaha and the warriors he led into battle. We were all gathered in the throne room, waiting for Cadence to walk down the aisle.

While we waited, dad, Bright Mac, and Pear Butter would coddle and try to make the boys say more words, Though they would always say, Dada. The display made me so happy that I hadn't noticed that Cadence had walked up the aisle until she cleared her throat. " Oh, sorry. Ahem. We have gathered here once again, to join these two in holy matrimony." This got a small chuckle from the audience. I turned my attention to Cadence to start things off. " Do you, Princess Cadence, take this Stallion to be your lawfully wedded husband, even though he's a bumbling dork?"

Cadence took a moment to stop her laughing to answer. " I do." She then took a ring from the pillow that Spike was holding, and placed it on Shinings horn.

" And do you, Shining Armor, take this Mare to be your lawfully wedded wife? Even though she is way out of your league." This got everyone in the room to laugh.

Shining ignored my jab and instead looked deep into Cadence's eyes. " I do." He took the remaining ring and placed it on Cadence's horn.

With the rings on, I took on my wolf form, unfurled my wings, and announced to the world. " By the power's given to me by All-Father Odin and the goddess of marriage Frigg. I now pronounce you, husband and wife. Now kiss before another army comes by and decides to ruin this moment more than I am." They both ignored my last statement and had their first kiss as a married couple.

After that, they went out onto the balcony, to make their union know to the gathered masses. At this point, Dash went and did her sonic rainboom as Shining and Cadence made their public kiss. ( Second best wedding ever.)

It has been a couple of hours since I proclaimed these two a married couple, and we were now in the courtyard watching the new bride and groom have their first dance. While we watched them dance, Discord popped into existence next to me. " Oh dear, what all did I miss?"

I grabbed him by the throat and started strangling him as subtly as I could. " Where the hell were you when the city was under attack?"

Between my shaking him around, he would tell me. " I..was...getting...Hobbes...acquainted...with...the...other...pets." Not wanting to ruin the rest of the wedding, I let him go.

" Next time, send a letter or something." The party went into high gear when Pinkie got on stage and motioned for me to join. " My work is never done. Is it?" I hopped onto the stage and grabbed the mic. " This is for the new couple on their special day." With a bit of magic, I was able to start some music.

https://youtu.be/A-Lo33Ep99I

As I sang the song, I would sometimes direct my attention to my wives, making them blush. While everyone was dancing, dad and Discord would snap photos of the going's on's of the whole party, capturing the best moments. Soon it was time for Shining and Cadence to head on over to their honeymoon destination and they went for the carriage. Before they left, Shining had yet another sibling moment with Twilight while Cadence came over to thank me.

" Thank you, Joe, this wedding would have been ruined had it not been for you." She then gave me a hug before heading to the carriage. " Oh my goodness, the bouquet." She quickly turned around and threw her flowers into the crowd.

The flowers fell into the middle of the crowd where it looked like Cobalt was about to catch it, but that was before a crazed Rarity came along. " It's mine!" Once she had the flowers, she regained her composure while chuckling. Spike then attacked her with a kiss, saying ' I'm the one'.

We all watched as the carriage drove off into the distance towards its honeymoon destination. It was then that Twilight spoke for all of us. " Now that, was a great wedding."

" Yeah, it was, though I wish I could remember what happened at the bachelor party."

It was then That Discord came over with the camera. " Actually, I believe I was able to get a few shots of what we did that night."

" Oh man, I gotta see this." Dash came over and swiped the camera from him and was about to look at them, but I swiped the camera from her. " Hey!"

" Listen, we're going to look at this one time, then after that, we're deleting them. Okay, here we go." Everybody gathered around me as I started to go through the photos. Some of it was way worse than we thought.

" Oh dear lord!"

" That's classic."

Author's Notes:

First. Sorry for the wait.
Second. I find this ironic cause my dad is getting married soon.
Third. The cilantro thing was meant to show that Chrysalis is a bug. Apparently, stink bugs give off a stench that some say smells like cilantro.
Fourth. Yes, there were obvious references to The Hangover.
Fifth. How the hell am I going to top off this?

Clip

https://youtu.be/Lj4XCbL63Ko