The Curse of Cruelty (Revised)
Chapter 1: Sucked In (redone)
Load Full Story Next Chapter It started off like a normal day, you know: you wake up, brush your teeth, comb the hair, go to school/work.
Stuff like that. But, for me, it was summer vaction. The much needed time off from school, and you have things planned, and other things you've wanted to do. But, one person: you know as Robert Parker, was doing somthing different as expected. You see, he got addicted to the show: My little pony: friendship is magic.
(friendship is FAKE)
You see, he was planning on seeing a few episodes online, and putting it on a playlist from youtube. The perfect plan, and he knew just how to do it. He already had a account, and all. But, finding the right episode was the problem. Not only that, but half of both seasons were un-watchable. Not that he felt sorry, but it was just that the funeral massacre was haunting enough. Thankfully, Jeff the killer was nowhere to be found, and The entire cast had to be redone thanks to his murder spree. What he still didn't get to this day was that the cops didn't fire a single shot at him. "Perhaps the donuts were spiked." he would always say. But today was different, he was going to forget that tragedy, and completely ignore the riot cops constantly chasing him through the streets.
When he got on Youtube, the main page was different. The backgrounds was blood red, and it had the words: KILL, KILL: All over it. Then after thirty seconds of nothing, a Zalgofied Pinkie came on the screen, and the MLP theme song was playing backwards.
"Nice try pinkie; i'm used to creepypasta." he taunted.
However, there was something odd about this, and it wasn't the weird music either. Something about the picture just... sucked him in almost, and... it felt weird like it was calling to him. But, Robert knew better. In a creepypasta, you act first when it begins acting funny, however, whoever made this Didn't have any brains for "it" never met the almighty Robert Parker!
Now, back to the weird pop-up. Robert looked into the picture for the first few minutes, expecting a screamer. (Not knowing that he would soon be screaming.) When it didn't come, he was on the verge on "X-ing"out the screen, when he began to feel strange. Like; Pinkie was stretching her hooves at him, and they were filthy. Most likely from terrible baking..
It was almost like the Pinkie was trying to drag him in. By that, i mean the "arms" were shifting on camera. The eyes were getting slowly redder, but not innocent in anyway, or he would have closed it already. When the arms got completely on camera, Robert began to feel drowsy, luckily, he had been reading the survival guide, and to come out kicking, he needed to defend himself in the best way possible. And he had a score to settle with pinkie..
Months earlier, The bet at SugarCube Corner
"I told you you couldn't beat me in strip poker!" taunted the lesbian baker.
"At least my balls are bigger!" fired back Robert. *Oops! wait! Wrong flashback...*
A Year Earlier, Robert's beating..
"And take that and that, you pink abomination!" Robert exclaimed as he yet again stomped Pinkie in the face.
"OK! OK! I give! Just stop already!" begged the money-less Pinkie Pie.
"And stay out of my universe! Your cupcakes taste awful!" he yelled after her, but she was suddenly gone!
"Where is she?..." he wondered as Pinkie slowly crept behind him, and reached into his back pocket to steal his golden wallet he'd gotten from a raid in the Assassin's Creed universe.
"tehehheh! He'll never see it coming!" she whispered, and quietly trotted off to her universe..
Present time..
Well alright Pinkie, you want to pull me back in? You going to pay for it. So, before loading up in the kitchen; he grabbed a snack, and powered up to god-mode Sue. He then proceeded to chant his Mary Sue phrase:
"By all that's fare, By all that's bad, Let no fairness escape my sight! Let all that's cheating, meet the light, fear my pimp-hand, Mary Sue's MIGHT!" and with that chant, Robert hair exploded into blonde-goodness, and his muscles bulged with story un-fairness; not only that, the kitchen knifes turned into kitchen machetes! Now, he was prepared to face the pink menace. He went back to the computer screen and faced it, and braced for the worst. He began to fall asleep when his eyes met pinkie's eyes....
**
"Buwahahahaha! Robert will never see my master plan coming!" schemed the pink abomination.
"I have his accomplice in hand, and he'll come running."
"Not only that, he'll be totally dumbstruck with my sexy new look!" she finished as she looked into her blood-red mirror that Rarity's soul made for her.
She had all her friends, including Martin ,and Alan's souls as well; every person's soul from the funeral massacre, plus 52% of Ponyville's population from Trollestia's miss-fired solar beam, and even Princess Luna's soul for the fun of it. But, alas, she had grown tired of waiting. Robert was still not here at her bone castle, and his Mary Sue disorder wasn't helping.
"With that kind of power, he could be unstoppable!" she thought to herself. She didn't have much to talk about, because her tyrant reign over Equestrian forces was bad enough, her economic skills were even worse! "Come on, get here already!" the pink mistress thought again and again...
**
"Darn, what happened here!" exclaimed a dumbstruck Robert. Even with the Mary Sue power up, he'd hadn't gotten there in time.. But, what mattered was Pinkie's death, and the retrieval of his golden wallet. He sped on his cloud he'd stolen from Goku, and instantly reached there in a matter of seconds.
"Here, tell Goku that you OK, and to let cell win the tournament." he informed the stoned cloud as it took it's tip, and sped back to the dragon ball z universe. He easily destroyed the guards by flashing his underwear at them; then proceeding to the main gate.
"Alright pinkie, i don't care if your humanized, and have a sexy new look, you going to join those imprisoned souls, and i'm getting back my wallet!" he announced.
He walked through the front gate, and was immediately pointed at by five-hundred guns, and crossbows.
"Well, well? Looks like the super-sayan has arrived.." seduced Pinkie.