I didn't make it more than a few steps away before I stopped. "Derpy, a thought occurs."

"Huh? What?" was her response as my abrupt stop almost made her bump into me. "You reconsidering foalnapping a Princess?"

"Oh no, I'm still going to do that." I said as I turned around to face her. "I just don't know how I'm going to actually get to Canterlot to foalnap the aforementioned Princess. You think Tia would know?"

"I'm still here." Tia said from her spot on the grass a few feet away.

I blinked stupidly. "Right. Sooooooo..... What would you recommend?" I asked as I walked over to her.

"You could use the train like a normal pony." Twilight mentioned.

Huh. Right. I forgot she was sitting there.

Tia and I stared at her.

"Boring!" Vinyl yelled as she trotted up to join us, only to earn her a swat from the charcoal roommate next to her.

"I agree. That doesn't seem very...." Tia looked at me, "Eldritch, does it?"

"His track record so far? Not at all." Vinyl said rubbing the back of her head with a hoof.

"Well, I'm all ears." I said stuffing my hands in my pockets.

"Well, you would be if you had ears to begin with." Vinyl said with a grin as she pointed at me with a hoof.

I saw Octavia (and heard Derpy) facehoof. Tia hid her giggle behind a hoof.

I pointed at the truthful mare. "You are not wrong there. However, ideas?"

"You could skydive." Vinyl pointed out. "It's not like you'd need a parachute. You'd survive the landing."

"Yes, but whatever, or whoever, he landed on more than likely wouldn't." Octavia stated her musings in a wonderful british accent.

"Yeah..." My tentacles wilted as I shivered. "Even being.... this." I gestured to all of me. "The idea of falling without something to catch me scares the hell outta me."

"I'd catch you." Derpy said, sitting down next to me and putting a wing around my legs.

"Awwwww!" Tia, Octavia, and Twilight all cooed.

"Soooooooon!" I heard Dinky yell from her spot at the head of the foals in front of the TV.

"Thanks Derpy." I gently patted her head with a tentacle as I felt heat rise in my cheeks.

"Hey. Wait a sec. Derpy could fly you down there!" Vinyl gestured to Derpy then to me.

"Eh? Explain." I narrowed my eye at her.

"Doesn't sound to hard." Derpy said. "Though carrying him might be a little awkward." I looked down at the mare owlishly.

"Derpy dear, aren't you worried about how heavy he is?" Octavia asked, sounding a little concerned.

"Hey." I said weakly, looking over at the charcoal mare. "Are you calling me fat?"

"What?" Octavia's thought process completely derailed as she looked in my direction with a dropped jaw. Vinyl snorted a laugh.

"No. I think she's calling you dense." Twilight commented almosted off-hoofedly.

"Oh shit!" I snapped before devolving into a fit of giggles.

"What?! No!" Octavia sputtered trying to salvage her thought.

"I think you did Octy." Vinyl said smugly, poking the charcoal mare in the ribs.

"I did not!" Octavia snapped at Vinyl with a bright red face.

"Well, Twilight may have a point." Tia pointed out, holding back her own set of giggles. "You may have your weight condensed. Which would work with your lean appearance."

"Like Envy from Fullmetal Magicka." Lyra spoke up.

"Shit!" I jumped and snapped my head to the left. Lyra was floating right next to me almost lazilly. "Lyra! When- How long have you been there?!"

"Couple minutes." The Eldritch Mare shrugged. "So, going to foalnap Princess Luna?"

"Y-yeah." I said, trying to get my heart back under control.

"You could just wrap your tentacles around Derpy's hooves and have her carry you that way." Lyra said gesturing a hoof and a tentacle between me and Derpy.

"You want to turn Derpy and Eldritch into a small living airship?" Twilight cocked her head to the side?

I looked at the purple mare, my tentacles twitching in confusion. "That's the first thing you thought of? An airship? Really?"

"That actually sounds like a decent way for him to be carried." Tia nodded. There was a thoughtful look on her face as she tapped her chin with a hoof. "That's not a bad description however."

"Derpy are you sure you can carry him?" Octavia asked.

"I'm sure." Derpy nodded.

"If she can put a crack in my house when it was still a black box, then she can probably carry me regardless of how heavy I actually am." I nodded at Octavia.

"Wait...." Vinyl spoke up. Once again the mare probably thought of something that nobody else thought about. "Lyra can fly." She pointed at the Mint Green Horror next to me.

"Yup." Lyra did a quick loop in the air.

"And I saw you flying, or floating, when we were having our battle." The pale DJ pointed her hoof at me.

"Yeah, come to think of it, that did happen." I nodded, rubbing my tentacles in thought as if they were a beard.

"So, does that mean you can fly?" Vinyl asked.

Now all eyes were on me. I blinked. "Ummmmmmm, probably? Yes? I haven't actually actively tried to fly... yet. If I did, I'd probably have to channel my inner Man of Steel and start by jumping or something like that."

"Not a bad movie." Octavia noted.

"Eh, it was visually pretty, and some story stuff was decent, but Snack Cider does not know how to portray Supermare or Bark Scent at all." Vinyl groaned. "Supermare is not a god looking down on regular ponies!" She grumbled.

"We could toss you off the edge of your island like a baby bird." Lyra commently with a devious smile at me.

I leaned away from her. "Please no."

"I believe carrying would be the best option." Tia said, cutting through our mostly train-of-thought conversation, while simultaneously grabbing all of our attention. "So, you have your way there. Now where are you going to land?"

"I haven't thought that far." I said stupidly. "I'm kinda just dealing with everything as it comes."

"While as nice as that can at times," Tia nodded, putting on her I'm a Princess, I know more than you smile. "It would be better to have a plan."

"Thank you!" Derpy pointed a hoof at the Princess.

"Mmmmmm..... true." I deflated.

"Good." Tia nodded at me. "So, who's going with you?"

"Derpy." I said.

Tia looked at Derpy with a raised brow. Derpy blushed. "Somepony has to try and keep him out of trouble."

"Try being the key word." Vinyl pointed out. "Hell, I'll go too."

"Me too, I can carry Vinyl." Lyra piped in.

"Vinyl, you're just going to leave me here?" Octavia almost looked offended.

"Would you rather stay here, relax, and enjoy the nice day, or would you prefer to run around Canterlot while trying to foalnap the Princess of the Moon?" Vinyl asked the charcoal mare with a skeptical look on her face.

"Vinyl," Octavia actually whined, "we never do anything fun together anymore!"

I leaned over to Derpy and stage whispered. "Are we sure they're not a couple?"

"Not for lack of trying." Octavia immediately snapped off with a small smirk in my direction.

"Okay one, I don't swing that way." Vinyl glared between Octavia and myself. "Two, fine you're coming. With Eld, Lyra and myself, I know we'd need at least two ponies to keep us on track." Vinyl finished with a facehoof.

"Oh joy." Octavia grinned at Vinyl happily.

"Alright. You have your team Eld." Tia smiled. Fine! Everyone can call me Eld now! "Derpy, Octavia, Lyra, Vinyl, and yourself."

"Wait a second, it's Canterlot, why aren't you coming?" I asked a question I feel like I should have asked to begin with.

"Oh, I'm going to stay here and explore." Tia smiled.

"Bored of Day Court?" I asked.

"Oh you have no idea." Tia seemed to briefly deflate before returning to her normal happy, peppy self. "Thus, I'm going to stay here and explore this potentially dangerous new floating island chain."

"Okay. I can't fault you for that." I admitted. "However, steer clear of a room with, red carpet, magic torches on the walls, and a large altar at the center. I had to send away something nasty and I don't know if there's anything lingering there. I doubt it, but just to be safe."

"Thank you." Tia nodded. "I feel what you mean. There's a faint echo of something I can't really place, but it's been fading ever since I first arrived."

"Good to know." I let out a breath I didn't know I'd been holding. "What's next?"

"The landing?" Derpy asked helpfully.

"Thank you Derpy." I said sighing and rubbing my tentacles. "Tia, where would you suggest I land?"

"If I were you, I'd land in the castle's statue garden." Tia said after a moment of thought.

"Aren't you worried about me accidentally releasing Discord?" I narrowed my eye at her. "Like, releasing him from my presence alone?"

"Like he could do anything to you." Tia smiled. "And if he happened to do anything to your little ponies...... I don't even want to know what you'd do to him." Tia's smile turned smug.

"Touche." I pointed at her. "So, once in the garden, where should we go? I don't exactly know where your sister's room is."

"Honestly... following the shouting." Tia sighed rubbed a hoof against her temple. "I can't remember the last time Luna actually slept."

"Ah, so she's one of those gamers." I shuddered. "What about the guards?"

"What about the guards?" Tia looked at me with a raised brow.

Derpy, Lyra, Octavia, Vinyl, Twilight and myself all stared at the Princess with looks somewhere near shock.

"U-ummmmmm. Aren't you worried they'll do something?" I said weakly, snapping out of my semi-stunned state.

Tia sighed. "I love them dearly, but....." She seemed to rub the bridge of her nose with a hoof before letting it fall to look at me. "The Solar Guard hasn't been a proper Guard for five-hundred years." She looked down at Twilight. "Yes, Twilight, your brother does a fantastic job as captain, but he's just one pony. The rest... The rest are more for show, regardless of how well Shining trains them. The Wonderbolts are more of a guard than they are, and they're showponies!" Tia flailed a hoof for emphasis. "Today's guard will more than likely run to Shining and have him deal with a problem, rather than stop something themselves. At this point they're just moral support, whose only job is to direct ponies on where to go in the castle or Canterlot proper." She finished with another sigh.

Honestly, Tia just looked tired. She looked like she could use a day off.

I couldn't help but glance around at the others to see their reactions. Twilight was staring at Tia in stunned disbelief with a dropped jaw. Vinyl and Lyra were both quietly snickering. Octavia was shooting a dirty look at Vinyl. Lastly, Derpy looked..... strangely unsurprised.

Derpy noticed my look. "What?" She asked. "I've had to deliver mail to Canterlot before. For the most part the guards seem helpful. Every so often I'll come across one who's rude. Yet, the moment I show any aggressive behavior they back down immediately."

"So.... long story short." I looked back to Tia. "Canterlot's kinda fucked if anybody invades?"

"Unfortunately." Tia sighed, looking tired.

I shuffled my feet a little "Well...." I began awkwardly. "Uh, have fun hanging out here, I hope you enjoy your talk with Twilight, umm try to keep ponies away if you could (I'd rather not have a repeat of yesterday), and umm keep the foals in line?" I finished weakly.

Tia's smile returned as she gave a small chuckle. "I plan on it, and I will." She looked down at Twilight. "Twilight, would you like to see if his palace has a library?"

Twilight immediately lit up like The Fourth of July. "YES!" She half-squeaked, half-shouted. She gave a passable impression of Pinkie Pie as she bounced next to the Princess. Tia returned her gaze to me. "Have fun storming the castle." She giggled before turning to begin walking towards the palace.

I watched the two go, then looked down to see four sets of eyes looking at me.

"Okay... Who wants to go foalnap a Princess?"

Author's Notes:

It's been far too long....

Yet inspiration has stuck!

I may have missed anything or two in the editing stage so please let me know.

As always I hope you enjoy the chapter!