You going to help me read." said Sirius. "Right?"

"Sure, I'll read the second half." said Harry quickly. He knew what was in the back half of the chapter and he didn't want Sirius reading it.

Sirius however, looked at Harry skeptically. "Hmm, I think I'll have you read the first part. You answered a bit too quickly for my liking."

Harry grumbled and snatched the book.

Harry spent a lot of time over the next few days dodging out of sight whenever he saw Gilderoy Lockhart coming down a corridor.

"Good, keep away from him, he makes me nervous when you are with him." said Remus calmly.

"He ain't going to like ending part is he?" whispered Ron with a smirk.

Harder to avoid was Colin Creevey, who seemed to have memorized Harry's schedule.

"You didn't, did you?" asked Fred staring at Colin stunned.

Colin looked nervous.

Nothing seemed to give Colin a bigger thrill than to say, "All right, Harry?" six or seven times a day and hear, "Hello, Colin," back, however exasperated Harry sounded when he said it.

Colin shuffled his feet embarrassingly.

"Poor Colin." whispered Hermione.

"He asked for it." said Ron.

Hedwig was still angry with Harry about the disastrous car journey

"It took a long time to have her warm back up to me." said Harry with a small smile.

"What did it take?" asked Remus.

"I think she finally thought that I had enough of the silent treatment." said Harry with a smile. "And making her homemade owl treats didn't hurt either."

and Ron's wand was still malfunctioning,

"Uh oh." said several students in the Great Hall.

surpassing itself on Friday morning by shooting out of Ron's hand in Charms and hitting tiny old Professor Flitwick squarely between the eyes, creating a large, throbbing green boil where it had struck.

"Oooh!" moaned Sirius and Remus together.

"Were you okay?" asked Dr. Clark trying not to laugh.

"I was fine. I've suffered worse." said Professor Flitwick with a broad grin. "A boil is nothing serious."

So with one thing and another, Harry was quite glad to reach the weekend.

"I was ready to sleep in that day." said Ron with a broad smile.

"I planned on finishing reading my books." said Hermione.

"I was going to go down to the kitchen and make something real early that morning." said Harry with a smile.

"Then we were going to go down to Hagrid's at in the afternoon." said Ron.

He, Ron, and Hermione were planning to visit Hagrid on Saturday morning.

"'Planning' is a good choice of words." said the trio.

Harry, however, was shaken awake several hours earlier than he would have liked by Oliver Wood, Captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team.

"I was pissed." said Harry with a smile. "That was one of the mornings that I didn't want to get up all that early. Six o clock in the morning was one thing, not five."

"Whassamatter?" said Harry groggily.

"You make it sound like you've been woken up in the middle of the night before. By someone with a problem." said Dumbledore thoughtfully.

Neville, Seamus, and Dean looked up innocently.

"Sort of." said Harry.

"Why would someone wake you up in the middle of the bloody night?" asked Sirius.

"Homesick, questions about random stuff, stuff like that." said Harry shrugging.

"Quidditch practice!" said Wood. "Come on!"

"Oh you have got to be kidding me! That early?" said Remus stunned.

"James was never that bad, he was bad, but at least he let you get some sleep." said Sirius with a smile.

Harry squinted at the window. There was a thin mist hanging across the pink-and-gold sky. Now that he was awake, he couldn't understand how he could have slept through the racket the birds were making.

"I thought that you always got up at dawn." said Hermione with a smirk.

"That was one of those mornings that I really wanted sleep in." said Harry. "And that is the only part of dawn I hate, normally I love songbirds, but those birds," said Harry shaking his head, "God, right away in the morning, they don't sound all that wonderful. It's a horrible sound right away in the morning, it's like they've all got bronchitis."

Several people laughed.

"Oliver," Harry croaked. "It's the crack of dawn."

"Exactly," said Wood. He was a tall and burly sixth year and, at the moment, his eyes were gleaming with a crazed enthusiasm.

"'Crazed'?" said George looking at Harry.

"That is a HUGE understatement, mate." said Fred shaking his head.

"It's part of our new training program. Come on, grab your broom, and let's go," said Wood heartily. "None of the other teams have started training yet; we're going to be first off the mark this year —"

"I would really freaking hope so." said Charlie shaking his head. "I would hope no other house trains right away in the year."

Yawning and shivering slightly,

"Was it cold that morning?" asked Dean.

"Sort of, but you try and get up hours earlier than what you wanted, you start shaking too." said Harry

Harry climbed out of bed and tried to find his Quidditch robes.

"Tried is a good choice of words. I just about started to use a shirt for pants." said Harry with an embarrassed smile.

"I've done that after a full moon." said Remus with a smile. "I actually almost stepped outside with that ensemble."

"Good man," said Wood. "Meet you on the field in fifteen minutes."

"So he really doesn't give you a chance to eat something when you get up?" said McGonagall appalled.

"Nope," said the veteran Gryffindor Quidditch team.

When he'd found his scarlet team robes and pulled on his cloak for warmth, Harry scribbled a note to Ron explaining where he'd gone

"That was nice of him." said Mrs. Weasley smiling over at him.

"Yeah, Scabbers tried to eat the note when I woke up." said Ron.

and went down the spiral staircase to the common room, his Nimbus Two Thousand on his shoulder. He had just reached the portrait hole when there was a clatter behind him and Colin Creevey came dashing down the spiral staircase,

"What in the world were you doing up so early?" asked McGonagall sternly.

"I just wanted watch Harry practice." said Colin quickly.

"How did you know that we were going to practice that early?" asked Fred.

"Yeah, cause not even we really knew when we were going to go to the pitch." said George.

"Well…" said Colin even quieter.

"I'm not too sure we wanna know." said Fred and George.

his camera swinging madly around his neck and something clutched in his hand.

"I heard someone saying your name on the stairs, Harry! Look what I've got here! I've had it developed, I wanted to show you."

"What the heck were you talking about?" said Ron.

"The picture of Lockhart and me." said Harry with a smirk.

Harry looked bemusedly at the photograph Colin was brandishing under his nose.

A moving, black-and-white Lockhart was tugging hard on an arm Harry recognized as his own. He was pleased to see that his photographic self was putting up a good fight and refusing to be dragged into view.

"That's the wonderful thing about magical photos." said Dumbledore with a broad smile. "If you don't want to show up in the picture, your photo self won't appear."

"Wish that would happen sometimes in the Muggle World." said Dr. Clark. "I've had a few that I wish I weren't in."

As Harry watched, Lockhart gave up and slumped, Panting, against the white edge of the picture.

"Yeah, he never was in shape." said Sirius. "He looks skinny, but he was in worse shape than, well, Peter."

"And that's saying something." said Remus with a smirk.

"Will you sign it?" said Colin eagerly.

"No." said Harry automatically.

"No," said Harry flatly, glancing around to check that the room was really deserted.

"Why did you look around?" asked Anthony.

"I didn't want a repeat of last time." said Harry.

"Sorry, Colin, I'm in a hurry — Quidditch practice —"

He climbed through the portrait hole.

"Oh, wow! Wait for me! I've never watched a Quidditch game before!"

Colin scrambled through the hole after him.

"Jeez, you can't shake him can you?" said Fred quietly.

"It'll be really boring," Harry said quickly,

"You really can't lie, Harry, you keep forgetting that." said Tonks grinning broadly.

but Colin ignored him, his face shining with excitement.

"You were the youngest House player in a hundred years, weren't you, Harry? Weren't you?" said Colin, trotting alongside him. "You must be brilliant. I've never flown. Is it easy? Is that your own broom? Is that the best one there is?"

"Holy…" said Sirius shaking his head. "I'd have gone absolutely mad with you following me all around the place." said Sirius looking over to Colin.

Harry didn't know how to get rid of him.

Colin turned and looked at Harry in shock.

"It was real early and…sorry." said Harry looking up from the book apologetically.

Colin looked down hurtfully, but then looked up with a smile.

"It's okay, I forgive you, if," said Colin.

"'If'?" said Harry.

"If you sign one of the photos I took of you." he said with a mischievous smile.

Harry opened his mouth to protest, but sighed and held out a hand for a photo.

Colin reached into his big photo album and selected the best photo he had and ran it over to Harry.

He smirked as he saw it was the one where he was talking and laughing with Ron and Hermione.

He signed it quick and walked it over to Ron and Hermione. "You guys need to sign it too."

Ron and Hermione took the quill and signed the photo and handed it back to Colin, who looked ecstatic.

It was like having an extremely talkative shadow.

"I don't really understand Quidditch," said Colin breathlessly. "Is it true there are four balls? And two of them fly around trying to knock people off their brooms?"

"I would have snapped by that time." said Sirius groaning.

"Yes," said Harry heavily, resigned to explaining the complicated rules of Quidditch. "They're called Bludgers. There are two Beaters on each team who carry clubs to beat the Bludgers away from their side. Fred and George Weasley are the Gryffindor Beaters."

Fred and George stood up and took a bow.

"And what are the other balls for?" Colin asked, tripping down a couple of steps because he was gazing open-mouthed at Harry.

"Harry actually caught me and stopped me from busting my face on the steps." said Colin excitedly.

"Did you?" asked Remus impressed.

"I caught his collar and broke his fall a bit." said Harry shrugging.

"Well, the Quaffle — that's the biggish red one — is the one that scores goals. Three Chasers on each team throw the Quaffle to each other and try and get it through the goal posts at the end of the pitch —

Angelina, Alicia, and Katie comically curtsied.

they're three long poles with hoops on the end."

"And the fourth ball —"

"— is the Golden Snitch," said Harry, "and it's very small, very fast, and difficult to catch. But that's what the Seeker's got to do, because a game of Quidditch doesn't end until the Snitch has been caught. And whichever team's Seeker gets the Snitch earns his team an extra hundred and fifty points."

"And you're the Gryffindor Seeker, aren't you?" said Colin in awe.

"You bet your wand he is." said Sirius giving Harry a shove with his shoulder.

"Yes," said Harry as they left the castle and started across the dew-drenched grass. "And there's the Keeper, too. He guards the goal posts. That's it, really."

"That made a very complex game sound so simple." said Dr. Clark with a laugh.

But Colin didn't stop questioning Harry all the way down the sloping lawns to the Quidditch field, and Harry only shook him off when he reached the changing rooms;

"I didn't want to bother him when he was changing." said Colin with a slight blush.

Colin called after him in a piping voice, "I'll go and get a good seat, Harry!" and hurried off to the stands.

The rest of the Gryffindor team were already in the changing room. Wood was the only person who looked truly awake. Fred and George Weasley were sitting, puffy-eyed and tousle haired, next to fourth year Alicia Spinnet, who seemed to be nodding off against the wall behind her. Her fellow Chasers, Katie Bell and Angelina Johnson, were yawning side by side opposite them.

"What did Harry look like?" asked Sirius wickedly.

"His hair was flat on one side." said Angelina with a smirk.

"There you are, Harry, what kept you?" said Wood briskly.

"'I was sleepwalking.'" said Harry with a smile.

"Now, I wanted a quick talk with you all before we actually get onto the field,

"Oh that's nice, he didn't even wait to hear what kept you." said Cho, she kept sending small smiles and quick glances over to Harry.

because I spent the summer devising a whole new training program, which I really think will make all the difference…"

"It actually did help, especially for what the Slytherins had up their sleeves." said Katie.

Wood was holding up a large diagram of a Quidditch field, on which were drawn many lines, arrows, and crosses in different colored inks. He took out his wand, tapped the board, and the arrows began to wiggle over the diagram like caterpillars. As Wood launched into a speech about his new tactics, Fred Weasley's head drooped right onto Alicia Spinnet's shoulder and he began to snore.

"Yeah, I don't remember much of what he said." said Fred with a smirk.

"Explains how you managed to fly in the complete opposite direction you were supposed to go." said George smiling.

The first board took nearly twenty minutes to explain, but there was another board under that, and a third under that one. Harry sank into a stupor as Wood droned on and on.

"I was about to excuse myself to the bathroom and sleep in the shower." said Harry with a laugh.

"So," said Wood, at long last, jerking Harry from a wistful fantasy about what he could be eating for breakfast at this very moment up at the castle.

"Not what I would have been fantasizing about." said Sirius with a wicked grin.

"You'd better not share that little fantasy with him, if it's the one you told me about years ago." said Remus warningly.

"There was nothing wrong with it!" defended Sirius.

"It couldn't even be labeled triple X! It would have to be severely watered down to be allowed into that category!" said Remus curtly.

"I'm fifteen now, how much longer do I have to wait to hear it?" said Harry teasingly.

"Dumbledore isn't even old enough to hear it." said Remus shortly.

"Hmm, it must be one very explicit sort of fantasy." said Dumbledore with a knowing smile.

"Is that clear? Any questions?"

"I've got a question, Oliver," said George, who had woken with a start. "Why couldn't you have told us all this yesterday when we were awake?"

"That's a good point, might as well tell them all this stuff when their brains are actually functioning." said Rivers with a smile.

Wood wasn't pleased.

"When is he, during a strategy session?" said Katie rolling her eyes.

"Now, listen here, you lot," he said, glowering at them all. "We should have won the Quidditch cup last year. We're easily the best team. But unfortunately — owing to circumstances beyond our control —"

Harry shifted guiltily in his seat. He had been unconscious in the hospital wing for the final match of the previous year, meaning that Gryffindor had been a player short and had suffered their worst defeat in three hundred years.

"It wasn't your fault mate, we should have had a reserve." said Fred soothingly.

"Besides, it's not like you planned on getting knocked out for three days." said George.

"And almost dying." said Remus sternly.

"Yeah, I didn't plan on that either." said Harry not looking at Remus.

Remus was about to strike up another argument but received a sharp blow to the back of his head. He glared over to Sirius, but Sirius smiled and nodded over to Remus' left. Remus looked over and saw Dumbledore smiling as well, but his eyes were focusing on the ceiling.

Wood took a moment to regain control of himself. Their last defeat was clearly still torturing him.

"Harry too apparently." said Alicia to Angelina sadly.

"So this year, we train harder than ever before… Okay, let's go and put our new theories into practice!" Wood shouted, seizing his broomstick and leading the way out of the locker rooms. Stiff-legged and still yawning, his team followed.

"I voted that we stun him and then lock him in his Quidditch locker." said Fred.

"Then we go up to the castle and get some sleep." said George.

They had been in the locker room so long that the sun was up completely now,

"What time was it?" asked Hannah.

"It was about seven-thirteen." said Harry.

although remnants of mist hung over the grass in the stadium. As Harry walked onto the field, he saw Ron and Hermione sitting in the stands.

"Nice of you guys to come out and watch his first practice of the year." said Charlie.

"Aren't you finished yet?" called Ron incredulously.

"I wished I was." said Harry rolling his eyes.

"Haven't even started," said Harry, looking jealously at the toast and marmalade Ron and Hermione had brought out of the Great Hall.

"Sorry mate, didn't know you didn't eat." said Ron.

"You should have asked for some, we would've gone and grabbed you some." said Hermione.

"I was drooling." said Harry. "I don't know how I could've asked any plainer."

"Wood's been teaching us new moves."

He mounted his broomstick and kicked at the ground, soaring up into the air. The cool morning air whipped his face, waking him far more effectively than Wood's long talk.

"That's one of the bad things about morning training, once you do it, you're awake the whole day." said Fred.

"Then you're not able to fall back asleep." said George.

It felt wonderful to be back on the Quidditch field. He soared right around the stadium at full speed, racing Fred and George.

"Bet you paid for that one later." said Sirius with a smirk.

"Actually, that was one of the moves, it never did pan out." said Harry.

"But you gotta admit, it was a lot of fun to practice." said George.

"What's that funny clicking noise?" called Fred as they hurtled around the corner.

"I'm still amazed that I heard that." said Fred with a smile.

Harry looked into the stands. Colin was sitting in one of the highest seats, his camera raised, taking picture after picture, the sound strangely magnified in the deserted stadium.

"You sound like a member of the paparazzi." said Dr. Clark shaking his head.

"What's that?" asked Draco.

"It's a photographer that follows around celebrities and other famous people, taking pictures of them all the time. They're really annoying actually, from what I hear."

"Why would you want to have that job?" asked Blaise confused.

"The opportunity to get close to a celebrity I guess." said Dr. Clark.

"Look this way, Harry! This way!" he cried shrilly.

"He was busy Mr. Creevey." said McGonagall sternly.

"Who's that?" said Fred.

"No idea," Harry lied, putting on a spurt of speed that took him as far away as possible from Colin.

Most of the people in the great hall gave a large gasp.

"Harry lied!" said some first year Hufflepuffs.

"Why did his first lie have to be to me." said Fred beginning to cry.

"Think of it this way, you were his first." said George with a snide smile.

Several people laughed as Fred and Harry glared at George.

"Sweet Merlin!" said Remus wiping his eye and looking over at Sirius. "It's like seeing you and James going at each other again!"

"What's going on?" said Wood, frowning, as he skimmed through the air toward them. "Why's that first year taking pictures? I don't like it. He could be a Slytherin spy, trying to find out about our new training program."

"We've never had to stoop to spying." said Snape sniffing in disgust.

"Don't be too sure about that." said Katie.

"We've caught several Slytherin boys trying to catch Chaser practice." said Angelina folding her arms.

"But I wouldn't exactly call them spies." said Alicia.

"Yeah, spies don't try and sneak into the girl's locker rooms." said Katie.

McGonagall looked as if she could breathe fire again, Snape had paled and stared at the three Gryffindor chasers, and the sky above darkened once again.

"Who were they?" said Dumbledore coldly, his voice vibrating off the walls.

"They were already dealt with," said Angelina with a smile. "We sort of made sure of that."

"And so did the boys." said Katie with an evil grin. "If they thought they were in bad shape after dealing with us, they were sorely mistaken after the boys got through with them."

"He's in Gryffindor," said Harry quickly.

"Should have realized that you had lied to me then, if you didn't know who he was, you wouldn't have known which house he belonged to." said Fred pouting.

"And the Slytherins don't need a spy, Oliver," said George.

"What makes you say that?" said Wood testily.

"Because they're here in person," said George, pointing.

"That would eliminate the need for spying alright." said Ernie with a smirk.

Several people in green robes were walking onto the field, broomsticks in their hands.

"Hey, that's not fair, the Gryffindors were there first." said Sirius angrily.

"I don't believe it!" Wood hissed in outrage. "I booked the field for today! We'll see about this!"

"Can you book the field for the whole day?" asked Remus over to McGonagall.

"Only if the other Heads of Houses agree, however, that entitles the other houses to have the field for one whole day as well." said McGonagall.

"It doesn't happen often." said Professor Flitwick.

Wood shot toward the ground, landing rather harder than he meant to in his anger, staggering slightly as he dismounted.

"Yeah, he couldn't walk very well after that." said Fred.

Harry, Fred, and George followed.

"We landed a bit softer though." said George.

"No point hurting ourselves." said Fred.

"Flint!" Wood bellowed at the Slytherin Captain. "This is our practice time! We got up specially! You can clear off now!"

"I told Flint that the field was off limits. What is he doing there." said Snape thoughtfully.

Draco cringed in his seat.

Marcus Flint was even larger than Wood. He had a look of trollish cunning

"That's a contradiction in terms." said Charlie with a smirk.

on his face as he replied, "Plenty of room for all of us, Wood."

"I don't know what gave him the gall to disobey me and go to the Quidditch pitch." said Snape sternly.

Angelina, Alicia, and Katie had come over, too. There were no girls on the Slytherin team, who stood shoulder to shoulder, facing the Gryffindors, leering to a man.

"You leer at a girl, you get slapped." said one of the Slytherin Chasers. "And it would have killed the chance to date them."

"But I booked the field!" said Wood, positively spitting with rage. "I booked it!"

"He heard you the first time." said George.

"Ah," said Flint. "But I've got a specially signed note here from Professor Snape.

"What?" said the Potions Master dumbfounded.

'I, Professor S. Snape, give the Slytherin team permission to practice today on the Quidditch field owing to the need to train their new Seeker'. "

"I did not write that letter." said Snape tensely.

"You've got a new Seeker?" said Wood, distracted. "Where?"

And from behind the six large figures before them came a seventh, smaller boy, smirking all over his pale, pointed face. It was Draco Malfoy.

"Mind telling me whose idea it was to forge that letter?" growled Snape to Malfoy.

"Well….um…it was Flint's idea." said Malfoy quickly.

"You're lying to me." said Snape sternly.

"It was mine." said Malfoy quietly.

"We will talk about this later." said Snape sternly.

"Aren't you Lucius Malfoy's son?" said Fred, looking at Malfoy with dislike.

"Yeah we never actually met the twit." said Fred.

"Funny you should mention Draco's father," said Flint as the whole Slytherin team smiled still more broadly. "Let me show you the generous gift he's made to the Slytherin team."

"Gifts?" said McGonagall, Flitwick and Sprout, each one stunned.

All seven of them held out their broomsticks. Seven highly polished, brand-new handles and seven sets of fine gold lettering spelling the words Nimbus Two Thousand and One gleamed under the Gryffindors' noses in the early morning sun.

"You told me that they pooled their money and sold their old brooms!" said McGonagall angrily.

"That was what I was told." drawled Snape but staring at Draco with anger in his eyes. "I wasn't aware of the fact that Lucius had struck a deal with Flint to get his son on the team."

"Very latest model. Only came out last month," said Flint carelessly, flicking a speck of dust from the end of his own. "I believe it outstrips the old Two Thousand series by a considerable amount.

"Not true, the speed is only ten more miles per hour, and the wood is stained black. Nothing more special than that." said Harry with a smirk. "But speed is only one factor in a game, they hold special games in the United States for one team to ride Shooting Stars and go up against Nimbus'. The ones on the Shooting Stars actually win some of the time."

"Seriously?" said Draco stunned.

"If you would read the articles instead of looking at the pictures in Witch Broomstick you'd learn something." said Harry with a small smile.

As for the old Cleansweeps" — he smiled nastily at Fred and George, who were both clutching Cleansweep Fives — "sweeps the board with them."

"And yet, you lot still have the best, well…the second best brooms in the school, and you haven't won a game against us." said Fred.

"Least not with us and Harry playing." said George.

"Ahem." said the three Chasers together.

"Against all of us, including Ron." said Harry with a quick look over to Ron. "Nobody can beat us in a fair game."

None of the Gryffindor team could think of anything to say for a moment.

"Which must have been a first." said Remus shaking his head.

Malfoy was smirking so broadly his cold eyes were reduced to slits.

"You weren't very pleasant to look at, let me tell you." said Katie with her tongue sticking out. "You looked like a real freak."

"Oh, look," said Flint. "A field invasion."

Ron and Hermione were crossing the grass to see what was going on.

"Two people make an invasion?" said George with a raised brow.

"What an idiot." said Fred slapping his forehead.

"What's happening?" Ron asked Harry. "Why aren't you playing? And what's he doing here?"

"Um, the Slytherins had brooms in their hands, and their Quidditch gear on. Chances are we're here to practice." said Draco with a smirk.

Ron blinked and opened his mouth, but slowly closed it. "Shut up." he mumbled.

He was looking at Malfoy, taking in his Slytherin Quidditch robes.

"And that didn't give it away?" asked a smirking Slytherin.

"I'm the new Slytherin Seeker, Weasley," said Malfoy, smugly. "Everyone's just been admiring the brooms my father's bought our team."

"Nice to know you can buy your way onto a sports team." said Dr. Clark. "Can you at least play well?" he asked the fifteen year old Slytherin Student.

"He's alright, he's the fifth best seeker the school has." said Angelina tartly.

"Fifth, aren't there only four teams?" asked Dr. Clark.

"I was replaced." said Harry pointing over to Ginny.

"Yeah, I don't know how Gryffindor managed to get the two best Seekers." said Ernie pouting slightly.

"Hey!" shouted Cho angrily.

"You're third best; Harry was always the best one in the school. Then came….Cedric…." said Ernie.

The entire school looked down in grief.

Dr. Clark looked around in confusion. "Am I missing something?"

"Cedric…" Harry started but couldn't finish.

"He was a seventh year Hufflepuff, a very brave and loyal young man, who unfortunately passed away last year." said Dumbledore somberly.

"How did it happen, seventeen year olds don't just fall down dead!" said Dr. Clark.

"He was murdered by order of Voldemort." said Dumbledore solemnly.

Dr. Clark paled. "I'm sorry."

Ron gaped, open-mouthed, at the seven superb broomsticks in front of him.

"Good, aren't they?" said Malfoy smoothly. "But perhaps the Gryffindor team will be able to raise some gold and get new brooms, too. You could raffle off those Cleansweep Fives; I expect a museum would bid for them."

"What a beast." said Katie quietly.

The Slytherin team howled with laughter.

"At least no one on the Gryffindor team had to buy their way in," said Hermione sharply. "Theygot in on pure talent."

"You go girl!" said Fred bobbing his head.

"Testify, sister!" said George snapping his fingers.

"Just like a boy, both of them are idiots." said Alicia.

The smug look on Malfoy's face flickered.

"No one asked your opinion, you filthy little Mudbloods," he spat.

People in the Great Hall released a loud gasp.

"He did not just say that!" said a small first year Ravenclaw.

"He did!" said her friend covering her mouth.

Muttering and growling fluttered around the Great Hall.

Draco looked slowly up to his Head of house. Snape looked at him, fury thundering from his eyes.

"We're going to talk now." he said venomously.

Snape took Malfoy by the arm and dragged him out of the Great Hall.

"I take it, that Mu…um…that word is a real bad word." said Dr. Clark nervously as he watched the furious professor drag the young man out of the room.

"Real bad." said Sirius.

"It's a foul name for someone born from an all muggle family. People like the Malfoy family don't like Muggleborns and Half-Bloods." said Ron angrily.

Dr. Clark sighed, "We've got people like that in our world, as well. They don't accept people of different cultures, skin or love life."

"I don't see how humans can be so cruel to their own kind." said Tempest shortly.

Firenze gave a small snort and rubbed the hoof prints on his chest and flank.

"Oh…" said Tempest sympathetically. "I'm sorry."

Lionus stared at the two of them. "She said 'sorry'? I don't believe it!" he said with a broad smile.

"That young stallion is ruining her." said Dr. Nicodemus with a smirk.

"She could use some softening." said Nightstrike.

Harry knew at once that Malfoy had said something really bad because there was an instant uproar at his words.

"I'm happy you didn't know that word before this." said Sirius.

"Hell, I hated reading that word. Let alone saying it." said Harry with a snarl.

Flint had to dive in front of Malfoy to stop Fred and George jumping on him,

"That must have been the only brave thing Flint's ever done." said Angelina.

"And stupid, did you see all the teeth that Fred knocked out of Flint's mouth?" said Katie.

"How about the black eyes, George gave him." said Alicia.

Alicia shrieked, "How dare you!" and Ron plunged his hand into his robes, pulled out his wand, yelling, "You'll pay for that one, Malfoy!" and pointed it furiously under Flint's arm at Malfoys face.

"Oh this won't end well." said Remus closing his eyes.

"Why not! Ron is a skilled enough wizard." said Mrs. Weasley defending her son.

"Ron's wand is busted." reminded Dr. Clark.

"Oh dear!" said Mrs. Weasley fretfully, she didn't remember that little fact..

A loud bang echoed around the stadium and a jet of green light shot out

"RONALD! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?" shouted Mrs. Weasley.

"It wasn't that spell, Mum" said Ron.

of the wrong end of Ron's wand,

"Oh no!" said Bill anxiously. "Ron, this can't be good!"

hitting him in the stomach and sending him reeling backward onto the grass.

"Ron! Ron! Are you all right?" squealed Hermione.

"That really scared me." said Hermione with a deep blush.

Ron opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. Instead he gave an almighty belch and several slugs dribbled out of his mouth onto his lap.

"Eeeww!" cried quite a few girls from every house.

"You have spells that do that? Of what use is that?" said Dr. Clark holding his stomach.

"It's a school-age curse; they aren't really supposed to do much of anything, except give you something to laugh at." said Sirius shrugging.

The Slytherin team were paralyzed with laughter.

"Oh that's real nice." said Dr. Clark.

Flint was doubled up, hanging onto his new broomstick for support.

"I hope it snaps." said Sirius glaring at the book.

"It did, he had to use a repair kit to fix it." said Harry with a malicious laugh.

Malfoy was on all fours, banging the ground with his fist.

"I hope he gets whatever is coming to him." said Mr. Weasley angrily.

"Oh he will." said Remus looking at the closed Great Hall door.

The Gryffindors were gathered around Ron, who kept belching large, glistening slugs. Nobody seemed to want to touch him.

"I don't blame you." said one of the seventh year Hufflepuffs.

"We'd better get him to Hagrid's, it's nearest," said Harry to Hermione, who nodded bravely,

"What do you mean 'bravely'?" asked a third year Gryffindor.

"Would you want to touch someone belching up slugs?" asked Hermione irritably.

"No." said the third year girl and her friends quickly.

and the pair of them pulled Ron up by the arms.

"I'll take it from here, cub." said Sirius taking the book from Harry's hands.

"Oh, come on! It hasn't been half a chapter yet!" pouted Harry trying to take the book back playfully.

"It's been more than half a chapter!" said Sirius tugging on the book. Finally he wrenched the book out of his godson's hands.

"What happened, Harry? What happened? Is he ill? But you can cure him, can't you?"

"Three guesses to who that is." said Fred with a laugh.

Colin had run down from his seat and was now dancing alongside them as they left the field. Ron gave a huge heave and more slugs dribbled down his front.

"That had to really suck." said Sirius.

"It did." said Ron turning greener by the minute.

"Oooh," said Colin, fascinated and raising his camera. "Can you hold him still, Harry?"

"Are you freaking kidding me!" said Bill wearily.

"You want a picture of someone sicking up slugs?" said Charlie.

"I had never seen it before." said Colin quietly.

"Be thankful for that." said Lee.

"I am." said Dr. Clark.

"Get out of the way, Colin!" said Harry angrily.

"That's your first warning, never incur the 'Evans Wrath'." said Remus with a smirk.

"You're life expectancy decreases immensely." said Sirius with a smirk. "Bout forty years per scolding." said Sirius tugging at a lock of gray hair. "I got this when I turned nineteen, when I scared your mother while she was pregnant with you. I thought the screaming and the curses were never going to end."

He and Hermione supported Ron out of the stadium and across the grounds toward the edge of the forest.

"Nearly there, Ron," said Hermione as the gamekeeper's cabin came into view. "You'll be all right in a minute — almost there —"

"I don't remember you reassuring me." said Ron.

"You were a little…um…busy." said Harry with a slight smile.

They were within twenty feet of Hagrid's house when the front door opened, but it wasn't Hagrid who emerged. Gilderoy Lockhart, wearing robes of palest mauve today, came striding out.

"ACCK! RUN!" shouted Harry and Ron together.

"Quick, behind here," Harry hissed, dragging Ron behind a nearby bush. Hermione followed, somewhat reluctantly.

"Thanks Harry, I didn't want him to try and help me." said Ron appreciatively.

"He was a teacher, I thought he could help us!" said Hermione defensively.

"I would rather ask help from Aragog then Lockhart." said Ron shortly.

"Who's Aragog." said Sirius.

"Never mind." said Harry and Ron quickly.

"Must be one of those 'you'll find out later' moments." said Remus frowning slightly.

"It's a simple matter if you know what you're doing!" Lockhart was saying loudly to Hagrid. "If you need help, you know where I am!

"Trying to get your hands on Harry?' said Remus shortly.

"Moony, drop it, okay? Cub says that nothing happened." said Sirius.

I'll let you have a copy of my book. I'm surprised you haven't already got one —

"Hagrid only gets books that have something to do with creatures." said Charlie. "Factual books."

I'll sign one tonight and send it over. Well, good-bye!" And he strode away toward the castle.

"Used it ter start me fire that next night." said Hagrid with a smile.

Several students laughed loudly. Remus and Sirius clapped loudly.

"Wish I had been there to see it." said Harry wistfully.

Harry waited until Lockhart was out of sight, then pulled Ron out of the bush and up to Hagrid's front door. They knocked urgently.

Hagrid appeared at once, looking very grumpy, but his expression brightened when he saw who it was.

"I was wonderin' if it were him again." said Hagrid gruffly.

"Bin wonderin' when you'd come ter see me — come in, come in — thought you mighta bin Professor Lockhart back again —"

"We wouldn't do that to you." said Ron kindly.

Harry and Hermione supported Ron over the threshold into the one-roomed cabin, which had an enormous bed in one corner, a fire crackling merrily in the other.

"We love going to Hagrid's during the winter. It's always so nice and warm in there." said Hermione.

Hagrid didn't seem perturbed by Ron's slug problem, which Harry hastily explained as he lowered Ron into a chair.

"I've seen worse." said Hagrid shrugging slightly.

"Better out than in," he said cheerfully, plunking a large copper basin in front of him. "Get 'em all up, Ron."

"I don't think there's anything to do except wait for it to stop," said Hermione anxiously,

"There isn't anything you can do." said Remus thoughtfully. "Not with that curse."

watching Ron bend over the basin. "That's a difficult curse to work at the best of times,

"Wow! So that means that Harry's tutoring was really working!" said Dennis excitedly.

but with a broken wand —"

"If it had been casted in the right direction, it would have been most impressive." said Dumbledore quietly, but he had a large smile on his face.

Hagrid was bustling around making them tea. His boarhound, Fang, was slobbering over Harry.

"He knocked me off my chair and pinned me on the floor. I had to scratch his ears like mad to get him off." said Harry with a bright smile.

"What did Lockhart want with you, Hagrid?" Harry asked, scratching Fang's ears.

"It was the only way to get up off the floor." said Harry.

"Givin' me advice on gettin' kelpies out of a well," growled Hagrid,

"Hagrid's been getting kelpies out of a well, way before Lockhart's mother even thought of having kids." said Charlie defending the large man.

moving a half-plucked rooster off his scrubbed table and setting down the teapot.

"Not what I would call a conversation piece." said Dr. Clark with a laugh.

"Weren' going ter talk about it, it was my lunch." said Hagrid slightly confused.

"You in the habit of using school chickens for your own meals?" asked Rivers.

"It was already dead. Got to the coops and it was just layin' there." said Hagrid shrugging.

"Like I don' know. An' bangin' on about some banshee he banished. If one word of it was true, I'll eat my kettle."

"And I still got me kettle." said Hagrid with a smirk.

It was most unlike Hagrid to criticize a Hogwarts' teacher,

"He doesn't criticize anyone except for Filch." said Ron.

and Harry looked at him in surprise. Hermione, however, said in a voice somewhat higher than usual, "I think you're being a bit unfair. Professor Dumbledore obviously thought he was the best man for the job —"

"The only man for the job." said Professor McGonagall grudgingly.

"He was the on'y man for the job," said Hagrid, offering them a plate of treacle fudge,

McGonagall smiled.

"I was sold." said Harry with a smile.

"But it's Hagrid cooking." whispered Sirius.

"I don't care, it's treacle." said Harry licking his lips.

"We could stick you in a maze, and leave a small piece of treacle at the end. You'd find the exit in two seconds." said Sirius.

"I'd give him half a second." said Remus. "I've seen him eat treacle; the bowl has to keep refilling itself every three minutes."

while Ron coughed squelchily into his basin.

"Okay, your descriptions have gone from picturesque to disgusting." said Fred sticking out his tongue.

"An' I mean the on'y one. Gettin' very difficult ter find anyone fer the Dark Arts job.

"I couldn't even locate an applicant this year, That is why I had to settle for…" said Dumbledore looking up at the restrained Umbridge.

People aren't too keen ter take it on, see. They're startin' ter think it's jinxed.

"Trust me, it is." said Remus with a small smile.

"Least you didn't die." said Harry with a smile. "The jinx looked out for at least the one real teacher we've had in the class."

"Didn't work for Professor Moody." said Dean quickly.

"That wasn't really him." said Harry.

"Oh, yeah. I forgot." said Dean.

"At least you could." said Moody gruffly, trying to put his magical eye back into place.

No one's lasted long fer a while now. So tell me," said Hagrid, jerking his head at Ron. "Who was he tryin' ter curse?"

"Someone who deserved it." said Snape sweeping back into the Great Hall.

Draco came following closely behind him, rubbing the back of his head in an embarrassed way. It didn't seem that Snape used corporal punishment this time.

"If I ever hear anyone saying that word one more time, be it boy or girl, I will make you wish I could just expel you." said Snape snarling mostly at the Slytherin students.

"Thank goodness I'm in the house I'm in." muttered a small Pure-Blood Ravenclaw student.

"That goes for all houses." snapped Professor Snape.

"Malfoy called Hermione something — it must've been really bad, because everyone went wild."

"That was an understatement." said Fred.

"It was bad," said Ron hoarsely, emerging over the tabletop looking pale and sweaty. "Malfoy called her 'Mudblood,' Hagrid —"

"The book said it, not me." said Sirius holding up his hands in surrender.

Ron dived out of sight again as a fresh wave of slugs made their appearance. Hagrid looked outraged.

"Cause of the slugs?" asked Dennis.

"Cause of the word." said Remus.

"He didn'!" he growled at Hermione.

"He did," she said. "But I don't know what it means. I could tell it was really rude, of course —"

"Just rude?" said George stunned.

"It was way more than that." said Angelina growling over to Draco.

"It's about the most insulting thing he could think of," gasped Ron, coming back up.

"That's saying something." said a small first year Gryffindor.

"Mudblood's a really foul name for someone who is Muggle-born — you know, non-magic parents. There are some wizards — like Malfoy's family — who think they're better than everyone else because they're what people call pure-blood."

"I would rather be a Muggleborn." said Hermione defiantly.

He gave a small burp, and a single slug fell into his outstretched hand. He threw it into the basin and continued, "I mean, the rest of us know it doesn't make any difference at all.

"Exactly." said Mr. Weasley.

Look at Neville Longbottom — he's pure-blood and he can hardly stand a cauldron the right way up."

"Sorry, Neville." said Ron quietly.

"An' they haven't invented a spell our Hermione can' do," said Hagrid proudly, making Hermione go a brilliant shade of magenta.

"There isn't a spell she hasn't been able to master." said Ron.

"Except for the Patronus." said Hermione in a whisper.

"You'll get it, I wasn't able to do it right for the longest time." said Harry with a smile.

"It's a disgusting thing to call someone," said Ron, wiping his sweaty brow with a shaking hand. "Dirty blood, see. Common blood. It's ridiculous. Most wizards these days are half-blood anyway. If we hadn't married Muggles we'd've died out."

"Wow, seriously?" said Dr. Clark.

Do you wish to hear the story of our origins? It is quite the tale?" asked Dumbledore with twinkling eyes. "I told this story a few weeks ago to Harry and he thoroughly enjoyed it."

"I think the students would benefit from that narrative as well. I don't think that Binns has dwelled on it yet." said McGonagall with a small smile.

"Might I start?" asked Harry. "I'm pretty sure that I remember it all, anything before is still a little foggy though."

"Of course." said Dumbledore with a bright smile.

"Thousands of years ago, there were four different separate sets of beings in this world. There were the animals, the beings that wander about in the normal world. You know, giraffes and stuff. Then there were the creatures, these had special abilities that the animals didn't, such as longevity or fire breathing. The only drawback was, was that the creatures didn't reproduce as often, so they were very rare. But they did live in some harmony with the animals. Though they mostly kept their distance." said Harry.

"Then there were the Men," said Dumbledore with a smile, "they lived in the caves and hunted and gathered for their food, they had no special abilities except for their ingenuity to utilize the materials around them and their ability to increase their strength. The final beings were the Milenia, they resembled the Men in every way, but they had many special talents to make up for their inability to increase their strength all that far and they were quite a bit more advanced in knowledge. These beings quarreled with each other constantly, over the fact that the Men had to work hard to hunt and gather their food, while the Milenia only had to wave their hands and food appeared out what seemed nowhere. It was quite a petty reason not to get along with each other."

"The Men however forgot their jealousy when the weather grew cold, and the Men's food supply ran out. The Milenia weren't so forgetful towards the past arguments and refused to help. So the Men had to work twice as hard just to find game to hunt, and when the spring storms came, the Milenia needed help rebuilding their own wooden houses and moving the debris left over by the storm." said Harry still reading. "However, the Men refused. So the Milenia had to create a way to lift the fallen trees. By the time they found a way to lift the trees out of the way, it was almost fall."

"It took them that long to come up with the levitation spell?" asked Fred.

"Life is easy due to the fact someone worked hard." said Dumbledore kindly.

"And they could whip food out of thin air? Isn't that against a magical physics law?" asked Hermione.

"Those were put up when we began using wands." said Harry.

"For several decades it went on like this," said Dumbledore shaking his head and continuing on with the story. "All the petty squabbling when the both of them could have created such a wonderful world for us to inherit, but alas, as it seems to be the common theme of late, 'hindsight is twenty-twenty'."

Harry smiled, "One day there was a fateful occurrence that caused quite an uproar that both parties tried their best to bury the knowledge as best they could. However, only the men were able to bury the knowledge, 'cause one of the Milenia tried to make the best of it."

"One day, a beautiful young Milenia woman, who had just been married to one of the most powerful Milenia men, had gone wandering. She however was attacked viciously by one of the Men, and was raped. Her husband Harmonia, went to join her and discovered the attacker, still in the process of ravaging his wife. Using his powers, he emitted a green jet of light and the man was instantly killed." said Dumbledore, his voice as cold as ice. "Thus the form of the 'Avada Kevada' curse was born."

"The woman lived, but due to the attack, nine months later she gave birth, to three children. None of them had the silver hair of Harmonia, or the blonde hair of the woman, but they did have the dark brown hair of the assaulter." said Harry. "Most of the Milenia wanted to abandon the children, or drop them off at the Men's dwellings, but Harmonia wouldn't have it, he and his wife decided to leave their village and live away from the rest of the Milenia and raise the small children."

"It was discovered as the children got older, that they couldn't just wave their hands and conjure the magic, like their mother and their loving adopted father. They would need some additional magical objects, and something to be an appendage of their hand. So Harmonia gathered an assortment of things and asked his children to find something to go with them, long stick. So they ran to the woods and gathered long and short sticks to use. Thus, creating the very first wands and the very first staff." said Dumbledore smiling.

The school stared in amazement, even Hermione and Ron stared, mostly at Harry.

"I see everyone's got a wand." said Dr. Clark looking around. "But not one staff."

"Oh those are used only for the most powerful of wizards and witches, I have one myself, but I hardly ever use it." said Dumbledore with a smile. "A wand is less cumbersome."

"Let's continue on with the reading, or we'll never get the chapter done with today." said Harry nudging Sirius.

"Hey! I found that stuff interesting." said Sirius defensively. "And you were telling the story too!"

"Only because there was a pretty girl in it." said Remus with a small smile.

"Yeah, but…that shouldn't have happened to her, I don't care if we came to be after that." said Sirius.

"What happened to the Milenia after that?" asked a small first year Ravenclaw.

"They died, it was never discovered how, but the entire village was destroyed by some unknown force. The Men who lived nearby managed to escape it for they moved several months before it happened." said Dumbledore.

He retched and ducked out of sight again.

"You picked a great line to start reading again on." said Fred laughing hard.

"Well, I don' blame yeh fer tryin' ter curse him, Ron," said Hagrid loudly over the thuds of more slugs hitting the basin.

"Oh that's gross." said Bill shaking his head. "Tell me you got better soon, Ron."

"Yeah, but it took a while." said Ron.

"I remember when Percy got cursed once; he had kippers flying out of his nose. Funniest thing I ever saw." said Charlie whispering to his older brother.

"Bu' maybe it was a good thing yer wand backfired.

"I disagree, throwing up slugs really sucked." muttered Ron.

'Spect Lucius Malfoy would've come marchin' up ter school if yeh'd cursed his son.

"He would have, and you would have been punished, but not more than what coincides with the crime." said McGonagall sternly.

Least yer not in trouble."

Harry would have pointed out that trouble didn't come much worse than having slugs pouring out of your mouth,

"Exactly!" said Ron.

but he couldn't; Hagrid's treacle fudge had cemented his jaws together.

"You didn't learn from last year?" said Charlie shaking his head.

"He said it was treacle fudge, I was willing to risk it." said Harry with a broad smile.

"So we can tack treacle to the list of your weaknesses, huh?" said Moody. "You've got about ten or so now."

"Looks like I have to get stronger than, doesn't it? To protect those weaknesses." said Harry with a smile.

Moody stared at him.

"Harry," said Hagrid abruptly as though struck by a sudden thought. "Gotta bone ter pick with yeh. I've heard you've bin givin' out signed photos. How come I haven't got one?"

"Oooh, sorry Hagrid, but I hope Harry whacks out on you." said Fred cringing.

"That's a low blow." said George shaking his head at Hagrid.

Furious, Harry wrenched his teeth apart.

"My jaw was sore for a week after that." said Harry rubbing his jowls absently.

"I have not been giving out signed photos," he said hotly. "If Lockhart's still spreading that around —"

"He actually was, said you were his protégé." said Professor Flitwick rubbing his temple.

"Sweet Merlin..." moaned Remus.

But then he saw that Hagrid was laughing.

"I still would have whacked out on you." said Fred shaking his head.

"I'm on'y jokin'," he said, patting Harry genially on the back and sending him face first into the table.

Several people laughed loudly.

"Sorry 'arry." said Hagrid apologetically.

"I was fine." said Harry with a smile. "But it didn't do my jaws any favors."

"I knew yeh hadn't really. I told Lockhart yeh didn' need teh. Yer more famous than him without tryin'."

"Bet he didn't like that." said Ernie with a snigger.

"Bet he didn't like that," said Harry, sitting up and rubbing his chin.

"Don' think he did," said Hagrid, his eyes twinkling. "An' then I told him I'd never read one o' his books an' he decided ter go.

"Wasn't a very good day for Dazzle Gum's ego." said Sirius with a loud, bark-like laugh.

Treacle fudge, Ron?" he added as Ron reappeared.

"No thanks," said Ron weakly. "Better not risk it."

"I saw how hard it was for you to open your mouth, didn't want that happening to me at the moment." said Ron with a weak smile.

"Come an' see what I've bin growin'," said Hagrid as Harry and Hermione finished the last of their tea.

In the small vegetable patch behind Hagrid's house were a dozen of the largest pumpkins Harry had ever seen. Each was the size of a large boulder.

Lionus whistled. "You must have had a secret weapon."

Hagrid, Hermione, Ron and Harry stared at him in wonder.

"Gettin' on well, aren't they?" said Hagrid happily. "Fer the Halloween feast… should be big enough by then."

"They sound big enough now!" said Dr. Clark laughing. "What day is it now?"

"It's October eighteenth." said Professor Vector.

"Excellent! I want to see what a Halloween is like here." said Dr. Clark excitedly.

"What've you been feeding them?" said Harry.

Hagrid looked over his shoulder to check that they were alone.

"Something not exactly normal, judging by his suspicious behavior." said Tonks with a smirk.

"Well, I've bin givin' them — you know — a bit o' help —"

Harry noticed Hagrid's flowery pink umbrella leaning against the back wall of the cabin.

"Oh, that's cheating!" said Sirius with a laugh.

Harry had had reason to believe before now that this umbrella was not all it looked; in fact, he had the strong impression that Hagrid's old school wand was concealed inside it.

"Jeez, took me three years to come to that conclusion." said Charlie pouting.

Hagrid wasn't supposed to use magic. He had been expelled from Hogwarts in his third year, but Harry had never found out why —

"I still say they're going to find out." said Fred rubbing his hands plottingly.

"We'll see." mumbled Zacharias.

any mention of the matter and Hagrid would clear his throat loudly and become mysteriously deaf until the subject was changed.

"I can only imagine that, doing so, only made that boy more suspicious." said Professor McGonagall with a smile.

"An Engorgement Charm, I suppose?" said Hermione, halfway between disapproval and amusement. "Well, you've done a good job on them."

"You never lighten up do you?" asked Anthony with a smile.

"She's lighten up a lot since first year." said Harry and Ron.

"That's what yer little sister said," said Hagrid, nodding at Ron.

"You knew about the Engorgement Charm?" asked Bill, highly impressed.

"Well, I did read a few of your old books." said Ginny with a mischievous smile.

"Met her jus' yesterday." Hagrid looked sideways at Harry, his beard twitching.

"Oh come on! Even he knew you had a crush on Harry." said George with a laugh.

"Said she was jus' lookin' round the grounds, but I reckon she was hopin' she might run inter someone else at my house." He winked at Harry.

"Harry was blushing all the way down to his socks." said Ron with a laugh.

"If yeh ask me, she wouldn' say no ter a signed —"

"Oh, shut up," said Harry.

"That's the great thing about Hagrid. He will mess with you and welcome all the comeback you got." said Charlie.

Ron snorted with laughter and the ground was sprayed with slugs.

"Hagrid won't like that one bit." said Tonks with a smirk.

"Watch it!" Hagrid roared, pulling Ron away from his precious pumpkins.

"Yeah, Hagrid's garden is his pride and joy, you don't want to deface it." said Remus. "One year, he had three fifth years blow up several of his pumpkins, they had to fertilized his garden for six months. By hand."

"Yeah, that really sucked." said Sirius, looking at his fingernail. "I swear I still have fertilizer under my nails."

It was nearly lunchtime and as Harry had only had one bit of treacle fudge since dawn,

Remus handed Harry the bowl of candied chestnuts from the day prior. "Eat something."

"I actually really like those, I'm gonna have a handful." said Sirius as Harry took some.

he was keen to go back to school to eat. They said good-bye to Hagrid and walked back up to the castle, Ron hiccoughing occasionally, but only bringing up two very small slugs.

"Well at least the curse is wearing off." said Dedalus, who had kept his mouth closed during most of the readings.

"I thought you were going to go the entire readings without speaking." said Bathilda with a smile.

"Well, I didn't really want to speak, these books are quite terrifying." said Dedalus.

"And he's a member of the Order?" whispered Ron.

"He deals mostly with taking people and putting them in a sort of protection program." said Sirius whispering back.

They had barely set foot in the cool entrance hall when a voice rang out, "There you are, Potter — Weasley." Professor McGonagall was walking toward them, looking stern. "You will both do your detentions this evening."

"That's a way to ruin your whole day. You get up at the crack of dawn and then you have to do detention till who-knows-when." said Sirius with a laugh, but then he stopped. "You aren't going into the forest again, are you?"

"No, he did not, neither of them." said Professor McGonagall.

"What're we doing, Professor?" said Ron, nervously suppressing a burp.

"I didn't want to vomit slugs all over her shoes. I would have gotten another night of detention tacked on." said Ron.

"Unless you make yourself sick, I wouldn't have given you a detention. I would have sent you straight to Hospital Wing and you might have gotten out of detention, at least for one week anyway." said McGonagall.

"Dang, I'll need to remember that." said Ron pouting slightly.

"You will be polishing the silver in the trophy room with Mr. Filch," said Professor McGonagall. "And no magic, Weasley — elbow grease."

"That was the worst detention ever." said Sirius. "James and I've done it all, but that was the worst one I've done. Hate cleaning."

Ron gulped. Argus Filch, the caretaker, was loathed by every student in the school.

"He threw garbage on the trophies we had to do." said Sirius baring his teeth.

"And you, Potter, will be helping Professor Lockhart answer his fan mail," said Professor McGonagall.

The entire school went quiet.

"What…were…you…thinking?" asked Remus to the Transfiguration teacher.

"What happened? You were the best one to assign detentions, you're slipping." said Sirius shaking his head.

"She didn't pick it." said Harry.

"Oh n — Professor, can't I go and do the trophy room, too?" said Harry desperately.

"Certainly not," said Professor McGonagall, raising her eyebrows. "Professor Lockhart requested you particularly.

"And you didn't notice him not wanting to do something easy?" asked Remus slowly. "And that Lockhart asked for Harry specially?"

"It concerned me, but I made sure he was fine." said McGonagall defiantly.

"How?" asked Remus sharply.

"There was a cat outside the window of the Lockhart's office." said Harry with a broad smile. "It was Tootsie."

Eight o'clock sharp, both of you."

Harry and Ron slouched into the Great Hall in states of deepest gloom, Hermione behind them, wearing a well-you-did-break-school-rules sort of expression.

"Moony gave that look to us once, what happened after that?" asked Sirius innocently.

"Someone put frog spawn in my shorts." muttered Remus.

Harry didn't enjoy his shepherd's pie as much as he'd thought.

"Who would have? If they knew they had Dazzle Gums to deal with later?" said Tonks with a laugh.

Both he and Ron felt they'd got the worse deal.

"I still say I got the worse deal." said Ron and Harry together.

"I'm actually not too sure who to vote for who had the short end of the stick." said Sirius with a smile.

"Harry did." said Remus quickly.

"Filch'll have me there all night," said Ron heavily. "No magic! There must be about a hundred cups in that room. I'm no good at Muggle cleaning."

"Nobody in our family except for Mum is all that good at Muggle cleaning." said Charlie.

"I'd swap anytime," said Harry hollowly. "I've had loads of practice with the Dursleys.

Snarls and growls crawled along the Great Hall.

"What did they have you polish, Harry?" asked Dumbledore coldly.

"Their silver, Aunt Petunia's wedding present from Uncle Vernon's family." said Harry.

"There wasn't a lot of it, was there?" asked Remus.

"They had a complete silverware set, platters and other small stuff like that. They also had some small silver statuettes. Takes the whole day to get them as shiny and clean as Aunt

Petunia wants it." said Harry.

"How many times do you do it?" asked Sirius.

"About once a week." said Harry shrug. "I usually do it on a Sunday."

"Did do it on Sundays." corrected Sirius. "You aren't going back, you're never going back."

Answering Lockhart's fan mail… he'll be a nightmare…"

"I can understand that." said Remus with a growl.

Saturday afternoon seemed to melt away, and in what seemed like no time, it was five minutes to eight, and Harry was dragging his feet along the second-floor corridor to Lockhart's office. He gritted his teeth and knocked.

"Wow, you sound really excited to go see Lockhart." said Lee with a smirk.

The door flew open at once.

"Dear Lord, he was waiting for you way too eagerly for my liking." said Remus muttering darkly.

Lockhart beamed down at him.

"Ah, here's the scalawag!" he said.

"Shoot me." said Sirius covering his eyes.

"That's what I was saying to myself when I was there." said Harry.

"Come in, Harry, come in —"

Shining brightly on the walls by the light of many candles were countless framed photographs of Lockhart. He had even signed a few of them.

"What the f…? He gave himself a signed photograph?" said Dr. Clark stunned.

"Yeah, it even said 'To the bravest and handsomest man, sighed Me'. It was beyond awkward." said Harry.

Remus and Sirius stared at Harry, and then started gagging.

"Hey! Do that somewhere else!" said Harry lifting the bowl of chestnuts out of harm's way.

Another large pile lay on his desk.

"You can address the envelopes!" Lockhart told Harry, as though this was a huge treat.

"I would rather have licked a boot." said Harry in disgust.

"This first one's to Gladys Gudgeon, bless her — huge fan of mine —"

"Poor, stupid Gladys." muttered Sirius to Remus.

The minutes snailed by. Harry let Lockhart's voice wash over him, occasionally saying, "Mmm" and "Right" and "Yeah." Now and then he caught a phrase like, "Fame's a fickle friend, Harry," or "Celebrity is as celebrity does, remember that."

"I would have snapped and beaten the man to a bloody pulp." said Kingsley quietly.

"I'd pay good money to see that." said Tonks eagerly.

The candles burned lower and lower, making the light dance over the many moving faces of Lockhart watching him.

"That was the only creepy part of that detention." said McGonagall quietly.

Harry moved his aching hand over what felt like the thousandth envelope, writing out Veronica Smethley's address.

"I still remember almost every single stupid address from those letters." said Harry darkly.

It must be nearly time to leave, Harry thought miserably, please let it be nearly time…

And then he heard something — something quite apart from the spitting of the dying candles and Lockhart's prattle about his fans.

It was a voice, a voice to chill the bone marrow, a voice of breathtaking, ice-cold venom.

Several people snapped their necks up to stare at Harry.

"What is it?" asked Bill quickly. Remus, Sirius, and Dr. Clark looked pale.

Harry said nothing.

"Come… come to me… Let me rip you.. .Let me tear you.. .Let me kill you…"

The entire school went as silent as a tomb.

Sirius stared at the page he was reading, "Tell me you don't go chasing after that thing."

"I don't." said Harry reassuringly.

"Least not then." muttered Ron to Hermione.

Harry gave a huge jump and a large lilac blot appeared on Veronica Smethley's street.

"What?" he said loudly.

"I know!" said Lockhart. "Six solid months at the top of the best-seller list! Broke all records!"

"He wasn't talking about that you idiot! The homicidal voice!" screeched Tonks.

"No," said Harry frantically. "That voice!"

"Wow, Harry was frantic? That's a first." said George.

"Sorry?" said Lockhart, looking puzzled. "What voice?"

"That — that voice that said — didn't you hear it?"

Lockhart was looking at Harry in high astonishment.

"So…he didn't hear it?" said Dr. Clark worriedly.

"What are you talking about, Harry? Perhaps you're getting a little drowsy? Great Scott — look at the time! We've been here nearly four hours! I'd never have believed it — the time's flown, hasn't it?"

"Not for Harry it didn't." said Lee with a small chuckle.

Harry didn't answer. He was straining his ears to hear the voice again, but there was no sound now except for Lockhart telling him he mustn't expect a treat like this every time he got detention. Feeling dazed,

Remus tensed once more. McGonagall noticed this and reassured him. "Nothing happened, I was right there, watching it all."

"Did you hear the voice?" asked Sirius quickly.

"No, I didn't." said McGonagall.

Harry left.

It was so late that the Gryffindor common room was almost empty. Harry went straight up to the dormitory. Ron wasn't back yet. Harry pulled on his pajamas, got into bed, and waited.

"Wow, I thought you had just gotten there about five minutes ahead of me." said Ron.

Half an hour later, Ron arrived, nursing his right arm and bringing a strong smell of polish into the darkened room.

"Explains the cleaning dream I had." said Seamus with a smirk.

"My muscles have all seized up," he groaned, sinking on his bed. "Fourteen times he made me buff up that Quidditch cup before he was satisfied. And then I had another slug attack all over a Special Award for Services to the School.

"Ouch, that sucks." said Charlie shaking his head.

Took ages to get the slime off… How was it with Lockhart?"

"Living hell." said Harry.

Keeping his voice low so as not to wake Neville, Dean, and Seamus, Harry told Ron exactly what he had heard.

"And Lockhart said he couldn't hear it?" said Ron. Harry could see him frowning in the moonlight. "D'you think he was lying? But I don't get it — even someone invisible would've had to open the door."

"Unless they were ghosts." said Moody thoughtfully.

"But Dazzle Gums would have heard that." said Remus.

"This is getting scary." said Dr. Clark reaching behind Sirius' head and rubbing the back of Harry's neck.

"I'm fine." said Harry with a small smile.

"I'm starting not to believe you when you say that." said Remus shortly.

"I know," said Harry, lying back in his four-poster and staring at the canopy above him. "I don't get it either."

"And you don't tell a Professor that you heard a disembodied voice of someone thinking of killing?" asked Bill stunned.

"Would you believe me?" said Harry seriously.

"No I guess not." said Bill embarrassedly.

"Who would like to read the next chapter?" asked Sirius.

"I'll take a crack at it." said Tonks happily.

"How the hell can you be happy?" asked Remus looking at Tonks in disbelief.

"Harry's fine, so I know he gets out of stuff all right." said Tonks.

She took the book passed to her and read the chapter title loudly.

"The Deathday Party."

"The what party? asked Dr. Clark.

"You'll find out." said Harry.

"This won't go well." whispered Hermione to Ron.