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How Two Worthless Genetic Freaks Founded a Nation

by TheDriderPony

Chapter 6: Two Liddell Alicorns: Part 1

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Of all the words one might use to describe the castle at the center of Forever Free City (recently renamed), 'magical' would generally not be one of them. It was built by earth ponies in their own image; dense, strong, and practical. The walls were fortified rather than adorned and the banners of heraldry were simple and visually distinct. It was a practical castle for practical ponies built to stand up to practically anything.

Plus, it didn't help that any decoration during the age of Discord was basically an open invitation for him to come and provide some of his rather transformative brand of artistic critique.

But with the world's worst critic "dead" and gone, a younger generation of ponies had taken to the idea that the castle was somewhat drab and utilitarian, especially as ponies in other cities started having the same idea.

It wasn’t more than a few years before a proper decorative arms race broke out. If the city of New Trot built a portcullis, then suddenly every castle needed one lest they seem shabby or poorer in comparison. Then ornate glass windows became popular. Then mosaiced bathing chambers.

Slowly but surely, even the castle of Forever Free City started to look like the kind of proper castle one hears about in fairy tales. Not nearly as effective in battle, but far more influential in a time of peace.

Still, there was only one part of the castle that your average pony on the street would call magical. The grand Court Wizard's Tower. It was, after all, the most visible part of the structure, even from the outermost slums. It soared high above all else, its architecture a mystery of long-forgotten magics. It was the eye-catching, jaw-dropping beacon that grabbed the attention of every visitor and, once an actual wizard set up shop, many of the locals as well.

But even the most fantastical things became ordinary with time, and the ponies of Forever Free eventually grew used to the guttural demonic howling and the seraphic ecclesiastical chimes. The muffled explosions where trails of smoke leaked out the windows and the less muffled ones that blew the chimney off. Even the bright and colorful lights that some nights merely flickered in the windows and other times strobed like rapid-firing lightning into the night became a comforting familiarity and a reminder that their city was under protection.

They didn't understand it, but they didn't need to. High magic was going on.

It was towards this tower that two figures strolled one early morning. Atop a battlement, a maid watched them make their way across the courtyard. Even at a distance they had the bearing of Heroes. They practically seemed to glide across the hoof-deep snow, every movement quick and precise, no second wasted in indecision. Facing the elements head-on without flinching at their foes. These were far from ordinary mares; they were Heroes, through and through.

Perhaps it was merely wonder clouding her eyes, but she could have sworn that a trail of glittering magic drifted in their wake, sparkling and twinkling in the morning light like fairy dust.

Fortunately for her, who remained at a distance, the effect of their heroic aura was somewhat lost upon approach.

"Cold, cold, cold, cold, cold." The shorter sister muttered the phrase like a mantra to ward off evil spirits, her teeth chattering between each syllable.

The door to the tower recognized them as they approached and swung open welcomingly. They entered without hesitation and it slammed shut behind them.

"Criminy it's cold!" Celestia swore once inside. She shook herself as she walked over to the thankfully lit fireplace, her sister following suit. Sweat from morning training that had frozen on their fur flaked off in a flurry of tiny crystals. She threw off her simple cloak and the chestplate she wore beneath it. Ice had formed on them as well which chipped off as they hit the ground. "Of all the times for his spell to fail, it just had to be on the coldest morning of the year."

Luna tapped the colorless gem set into the discarded breastplate and compared it to the crimson one on her own. "Do you think it ran out of mana? Or maybe it took a hit during sparring?"

"As if I know," Celestia grumbled, "Hopefully he can fix it. You have no idea just how cold it is out there without a heating charm. I swear it never got this cold when we were little."

"Maybe you've just grown soft." She teasingly poked her sister's flanks, the only place where a little fat always seemed to stick around.

Celestia gave her a deadpan stare. "Do you want to take off your heated armor and go back out there?"

A dry chuckle escaped her. "Oh little sister-"

"Stop that." Celestia interrupted, "I'm the big sister."

"Not anymooore-!" Luna trilled as she raised her head above her sister's with a grin that threatened to split her face, which was something she'd been doing a lot lately now that she could. Much to her delight and her sister's chagrin, Luna's recent growth spurt had finally allowed her to eclipse her sister's height. Now she was the big sister, if in stature only.

In time, her laughter petered out and Celestia groaned. "We can't put this off any longer can we?"

"He's expecting us," Luna agreed. "I bet he's going to start yelling in a minute if we don't hurry up."

Neither sister moved for a moment, but there was no escaping it. With a sigh, Celestia grabbed her disenchanted armor and turned towards the spiral stairs. Luna followed, still dressed.

"You're keeping your armor on?"

"Just in case. He might want to try some new combat spells today."

"If he is, he might change his mind if you ‘accidentally’ leave your armor down here."

“Hm. Good point.” With that, she shed her garments and the pair lapsed back into silence as they started up the stairs.

The spiral staircase coiled along the wall of the tower, leaving a hole in the middle that could let an impatient traveller go all the way from the highest floor to the lowest in no time flat (if they didn't mind a sudden stop at the end). Landings came periodically with arches that led into various rooms. They passed many on their way to the top.

An overstuffed library filled with more books and scrolls than the rest of the country combined.

A miniature smithy with a rainbow of metal ingots and a worktable spilling over with enchantable gemstones.

A room with nothing but a cauldron which sat over top an everlasting fire, bubbling and frothing but never diminishing.

Celestia and Luna walked past them all with nary a glance, as the fascination charms were keyed to pass them over. A normal pony (be they a lost servant, a visiting scholar, or a would-be assassin) would find themselves charmed and enraptured by the mysticism and majesty and leave with a subtle mental suggestion to spread stories of how fantastical it was.

The higher floors had actual doors on them, concealing away rooms filled with enchanted candles and noise-making contraptions that Starswirl used to build the tower's public image.

Finally, they reached the top level where there were two doors. One led inward to a tasteful sitting room and observation chamber, outfitted with both cushioned chairs and magically enhanced telescopes that could see either distant stars or any street in town.

The other looked as though it should open directly into the empty air outside the tower.

It was, of course, the second door that they opened.

Starswirl really did love his spatial manipulation spells. Besides being his field of specialty, it was also just generally one of his favorite things. Right after alcohol and his herbs.

"So," Celestia began as she took the first steps of their long walk down the much tighter second staircase towards the research chambers. "Any guesses what spells he'll have us test today?"

Luna groaned. "Who knows? I just hope it's not another transformation one. I still haven't recovered from the afternoon I spent as a squirrel."

"At least you could still run about and breathe air. I was stuck swimming round and round a bowl all day."

"Maybe if we're lucky it'll be a new enchantment," Luna offered hopefully, "I did ask him if he could make something that could preen my wings for me."

Celestia glanced at her wings. Though she was well versed in the intricacies of preening (thank the stars for that one charitable pegasus guard) her mouth was built more like that of an earth pony's and she could never quite get past the unsettling feeling of feathers running across her tongue. "That would be nice."

A teasing smirk flitted across Luna's face as she gave her sister a nudge. "Anything to help catch War Hammer's eye, eh?"

"L-Lu! The very idea-! I-I have no such intentions-"

"Oh please, it's not like half the castle doesn't know about your affections. Besides, there's nothing wrong with us looking. We're well into courting age and have done pretty well for ourselves if I do say so myself. Outside of the old families and the tribal purists, I bet we could probably have our pick of stallions if we wanted. But nooooo..." she rolled her eyes dramatically, "You just had to set your sights on War Hammer, Mr. I-felt-an-emotion-once-and-didn't-like-it."

A heat burned across Celestia's face as she tried to keep her composure. She needed a biting retort, and quick, or else she was going to lose so many sibling points! "W-Well, at least I'm pursuing somepony. Which is more than you've ever done with a stallion."

"Who says I haven't?"

"L-Lu!"

"Kidding!" She gave her sister another friendly shove. "Seriously, you need to stop worrying and stressing so much. Enjoy your youth while you have it."

Celesta huffed and reeled back a little dignity. "And you need to grow up; start taking things more seriously. We're not fillies anymore."

"Age is just a number, sister dear. And besides," she rested her head atop her sister's, "Don't you think I've been doing plenty of growing already?"

Celestia grumbled, but finding herself without a valid comeback chose to change the topic instead. "How many tests will today make?"

"732 for me, 726 for you."

The discrepancy earned her a quizzical glance. "How did you get ahead?"

"Starswirl said the tests he did that time you got split into two ponies still only counted as one each."

"Oh." Her expression fell in slight disappointment. She stopped walking for a moment to juggle her armor around to her other wing. "Still, that's nearly three quarters of the way through our punishment." Finally getting it comfortable, she shook out her stiff other wing and continued. "And I still say testing a thousand new spells is too much. I mean really, it was just one city."

"And the whole world's supply of crystalberry wine."

"Oh. Right. Forgot about that."

They rounded the last bend of the stairs to find a long hallway lined with sturdy doors on either side. They approached and knocked on the closest.

"You're late," a voice beckoned from within.

"Sorry Starswirl," they replied as they entered. Such was their usual greeting. Though it may have seemed cold, they knew he meant it affectionately. The pair had long since learned that Starswirl, Master of the Arcane, was rather a novice when it came to genuine social interaction in ways that didn't involve pulling the wool over someone's eyes.

They could arrive an hour early and he'd still call them late.

The room beyond the door was a wizard's fever dream. Across one wall hung countless racks and shelves loaded down with magical ingredients and components (the good stuff, not the showroom pablum and parlor tricks he kept upstairs for visitors to see). Beneath them sat tables, thick and sturdy but covered with scratches and scorch marks, littered with countless projects in various stages of completion. Though the rest of the room was sparsely filled, it showed the signs of innumerable magical misfires and after effects. Parts of the wall were slagged or fractured, and one section seemed unable to decide if it was stone or wood. The floor too bore the marks of heavy usage, its stonework hidden beneath the charred tallow of countless candles, smudges and smears from old chalk, and a pattern of thoroughly clean-scrubbed runes that could throw up a shield faster than even their creator himself could.

And everywhere—on the tables, under the tables, scattered across the floor—were bottles, casks, and wineskins. 'Fuel for the creative process'. If some pony were to gather them all up in one place, they could easily start a small shop. Not that Starswirl had any intention of doing so, nor even owned most of them.

One small corner of the room was home to a small oasis of semi-normalcy. It held a few small chairs (made from scrap) and one cushioned bench (stolen), as well as a basin of cold water. It was an allowance Starswirl had made in his work space for his assistants to rest and recover between tests (and often from tests) where they wouldn't get in the way of anything.

Starswirl rose from the cushioned chair and dumped the ashes of his pipe into a nearby pot. "No matter. Today's should be a short test." He winked in an entirely uncharacteristic way that set their hairs on end. "I think you're going to like this one"

The pair of mares winced. That was usually a bad sign.

"Follow me," he said as he headed for the door. "I moved it to another room."

Celestia rolled her eyes but followed, as did her sister one step behind. More likely he had just created a new room on a whim and placed his creation there to justify the space's existence.

The walk was not a long one, but the air of apprehension made it seems to stretch for miles of suffocating silence.

"King Ash wants to see you tonight." Celestia blurted, breaking the silence if not the tension. "He asked me to let you know."

Starswirl scoffed. "What does he want now?"

Though he put on a face for the courts, it was no secret to the alicorns that Starswirl cared for their liege exactly as much as he cared for most other ponies: measured by how much he could wring out of them.

"He has a cough. Wants you to come look at it and concoct a remedy."

"A cough remedy?" Disdain dripped from his voice so undisguisedly they could practically see it dribbling onto the floor. "Who does that stallion think he is? A cough remedy, I ask you! Like I'm some kind of streetside apothecary."

"I'm pretty sure he thinks he's the king," Luna pointed out, though she went unheard.

Starswirl shook his head, sending his ringlets flying. "I swear, the older he gets, the more of a hypochondriac he becomes."

Luna picked up her pace, darting ahead and around her sister so that her voice wouldn't be lost. "Better safe than sorry. Imagine what would happen if it turned out he actually was sick and then died? He doesn't even have an heir!"

The wizard came to a sudden and dead stop, making the ponies behind him crash into one another in a tangle of wings and legs.

"Yes..." He mused, a hoof stroking his beard as his voice took on a hard inflection. "No heirs. Yes, that might actually be- no. No, it wouldn't. It would be a short-term gain but disastrous in the long run if they're barren. We don't need another succession war like in Harmonia."

Starswirl blinked and looked up, rising from the depths of his mind to once again rejoin the world. "What are you two doing lying on the floor like that? Get up. Didn't I tell you we were behind schedule already?"

"Sorry Starswirl," came the all-too-familiar chorus.


The air in Starswirl's latest addition to his tower still carried the sizzling magical tingle of a space only just recently forced into existence. It frizzed out the hairs of their manes and tails and discharged small arcs of raw mana when they brushed against enchanted objects (something they'd learned the hard way somewhere around punishment test number two hundred, and the subsequent twenty that followed to study the effect).

There were no chairs present; the room was unadorned save for a single tall and cloak-covered object in the room's center. The pair sat down on the floor—the stones thankfully still toasty from the magical expansion—as Starswirl stood by his creation and cleared his throat.

“Today’s experiment is one of great import. The fundamental spellwork alone is based on a total inversion of Sacred Sigil’s standard matrices, which utilize a formula I derived from cross-reducing the magical coefficients of…”

Celestia and Luna made themselves comfortable, knowing that from this point on they could tune out what would be either an overly-technical explanation which they had no hope of understanding or inane drunken ramblings. And with Starswirl, the line between the two was never clear. Besides, he'd always summarize anything actually important at the end as he chastised them for not listening the first time. It was a peculiar system, but one that had been grown and designed around the eccentric wizard's quirks.

"...using the spellcraft of my spying glass as a rudimentary framework..."

That made them perk their ears up. Starswirl's spying glass was one of their favorites of his creations and one of the few which he allowed them free access to (so long as they asked first). An enchanted hoof mirror which allowed one to see faraway lands as though they were right outside. It was a fantastic toy both for exploring the world and, in their younger days, watching pranks unfold at a safe distance. For some reason though, Starswirl always insisted on wiping its viewing history before letting either of them use it.

“...and after extrapolating the auric waveform functions into a stable frequency, I was able to produce... this!"

With a grand gesture, he removed the cloth to unveil his latest creation.

In many ways, it resembled a standing mirror. But no mere mirror every bore such heavy ornamentation, not even in the richest of noble houses.

"My Spying Glass MK 2: The World Window."

A moment passed as he awaited their usual praise.

"Isn't that the mirror Lady Amethyst sent the king for his birthday?"

"I think it is."

"It is not and you won't find any records or ledgers of such a gift from her ever arriving at the castle."

Celestia gave him an odd look. "You know he'd probably have just given you the mirror if you asked for it, right? King Ash thinks the world of you. He gave you a whole tower for yourself and his right-hoof seat at the banquet hall."

Starswirl scoffed and rolled his eyes. "This coming from the grown mare that still picks pockets when she visits the market."

Crimson fire spread across her cheeks in a hot flush. "It- It's a very valuable skill!"

"For an orphan and a street rat," he countered, "Less so for a mare with private accommodations, unlimited free food, and who has led a multi-fronted assault against a foreign power."

She lowered her head in defeat. "Now, where was I?"

"The World Window," said Luna.

"Right, yes. The Spying Glass MK II. Behold!"

Humoring him, the sisters oohed and ahhed appreciatively, and they didn't even have to fake it all that much this time. For once they found themselves genuinely excited about testing a new magical device. Who knew what wondrous new features this upgraded model might have.

Pilfered or not, the mirror was a marvelous sight to behold. The frame was polished to a shine, pale lavender manyullyn shaped into a high oval. Inset rubies glistened and winked like so many gimlet eyes, thrumming and glowing with magical charge at the edges of perception. Ironwood encased the edges, hoof-carved by an obviously master craftspony into spiraling filigree that looked too delicate to support its own weight.

It was an unparalleled work of art. Naturally, since it had been designed as a gift fit for a king.

"What does it do?" Luna asked eagerly.

"This one," Starswirl paused for effect, ever the showman, "Is bigger! It displays everything in true-to-life size."

They waited for him to continue. He did not.

"And?"

Starswirl broke his pose. "And what?"

"Is that it?" Luna cocked her head as though a different angle might reveal some hidden feature. "It's just bigger?"

"Just bigger? Do you have any idea how frustrating it was to try and sp- try and see everything on that tiny glass?"

Seeing their rather unimpressed expressions, he lit his horn in a huff. "Fine. I'll just show you how much better it is."

Two by two, the jewels set around the frame began to light, each one sparkling with a brilliant radiance. The largest gem at the mirror's apex (one that notably did not match the rest of the design) was practically blinding. Their reflections, what they could make of them through the light, began to waver and wilt, soon falling from the frame entirely and leaving behind a blank canvas. On some unseen cue, Starswirl dimmed his horn and the gems dimmed in response to a much more agreeable glow.

The mirror no longer showed the room in which they stood. Instead, beyond the veil was a forest clad in the orange glow of twilight. Pines stood like silent sentinels, keeping much of the snow off the loamy ground below.

Starswirl grinned. It worked. Of course it did, he had every confidence in his creations, (though he had briefly worried over his rash decision to activate without selecting destination beforehand).

Most importantly, his display had had the desired effect on the two mares.

"It's so real..." True, seeing everything on the other side at the proper size was entirely different from holding it in their hoof. "It's like a doorway that I could just walk through and be somewhere else."

"Well, don't," Starswirl warned. "You'll smack your muzzle into the glass and be spending the next hour polishing it till it's spotless again."

"Oh..." came Celestia's disappointed sigh. "Can I at least get closer if I promise not to touch it?"

"Hmph. Fine. Do as you wish."

She took a step closer and leaned in till her breath was nearly fogging the glass. While not nearly as overtly showy as a color-changing fireball or self-repairing armor, the magic of the mirror was amazing in its small details. Calling it a window really was the best way to describe it. The sheen of the glass itself was all but invisible unless it caught the light of a candle behind her, and she could even see further around the edge if she tilted her head.

Something shiny twinkled at the edge of her vision and she twisted her neck to try and get a better view.

"What are you doing?" Starswirl asked.

"I see something," she explained, "I just need to get... a slightly better angle."

"Lean in a little more, why doncha?" Luna teased. "Maybe it'll pick up on your thoughts and shift to a low view of War Hammer's bedroom."

"Wha- Lu! There's no way I would ever- whoa!"

There were many drawbacks of having a long mane. The time wasted brushing it, the high cost of soap, and getting it tangled in things to name a few. Another issue is a long mane's annoying ability to retain water or, in winter, snow. Snow which, when brought into a room filled with toasty flagstones, would then slowly melt and drain out into a puddle. A puddle in which hooves —still semi-numb from cold—could easily slip.

A great crashing sound like a regiment of knights in full platemail getting struck by lightning shook the room as Celestia fell forwards and through, fragments of shattered silver glass raining down all around. Without the enchanted glass to stabilize it, the image of trees melted into a swirling vortex of wild colors. A vortex that quickly sucked an alicorn inside.

"What in the nine-!"

"Cel! Wait for me! I'm com-!"

Followed quickly by the other one.

Starswirl stood in shock for a moment at the swirling rabbit-hole of a magical anomaly his two meal tickets had just disappeared into. His mind, ever sharp, raced through his options, weighed costs, and judged value versus risk.

"Oh Tartarus," he grumbled as he jumped in after them.

Author's Notes:

This one was getting long, so I decided to split it in two.
Expect part two next week.
(For real this time.)

Next Chapter: Two Liddell Alicorns: Part 2 Estimated time remaining: 36 Minutes
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