It's been over three months since their marriage, and Luna's belly was swollen. She now had trouble walking, and Deadpool, being an actual gentleman, picked her up and carried her around. In his mind, Luna was probably the best weight he ever lifted, but he was easily snapped back into reality as he remembered that this was both Luna and his wife. The two had came back from some tacos, something Deadpool loved and hated now; loved because this was their time to escape responsibilities & get something to eat, hated because of... Luna's smells everynight... and it's not his fault from the smell & the fact that her flank was really soft. The two reentered the castle, only for everything to be dark. Then the lights turned on.

"SURPRISE!!!" Deadpool jumped back as the Taco Squad, Mane 6, Celestia, Cadence & Shining Armor, Stuffy & Crazy, Cable, Weasel, Bob, and Blind Al jumped from behind... well... except for Al.

"Did I miss it?" She asked "Crap."

"What the-!?" Luna yelled in shock "Wha-What is this!?"

"It's a baby Shower, sister." Celestia said

"Baby Shower? But the baby isn't here yet." Celestia giggled

"No, sister. A baby shower is like... a birthday for an expected mother. We all have gifts for the baby, and some tools you can use to help."

"Ooh! Presents!" Deadpool said. He lifted Luna, teleported, and gently placed her on the throne.

"Why thank you, Deadpool." Luna said. "How does this work?"

"You just open gifts everyone sent ya. And I'm quite surprised you guys made it!"

"W-well you've been gone for a while, Wade." Bob replied "It's been boring since you did something."

"But I'm glad you took some responsibility." Cable spoke "Though I just hope the baby's fine."

"If he can risk his life to save Vanessa without me," Weasel spoke, drinking from a flask "then he can raise a kid. Wouldn't you agree, Al?"

"God I miss Cocaine." she muttered to herself.

"PRESENT TIME!!!" Pinkie and surprise cheered in unison.

"I think we should be last," Discord suggested to the Taco squad "after all, we have the best gift!"

"Maybe," Deadpool said "but, I'm fine with that."

"I guess I'll go first." Twilight said, walking to her with her gift. "Princess Luna, I'm certain that you have a beautiful singing voice, so this will do." Luna opened her gift. "It's a book of nursery rhymes. Babies tend to be loud at night, so this will help."

"Oh, thank you, Twilight." Luna said with a smile

"A book!?" Cable yelled in shock "Alright, this will do you two!" He pulled out a large, futuristic looking crib. "The Cribs-a-lot 4000. Complete with self rocking, diaper changing, mattress & bed cleaner, and, best of all, a screen to help her get the skills needed for a job."

"Ooh! Working around the job system?" Deadpool asked "Nice! Now she can already have the experience for a job needed that won't offer the experience! ... Is that normal here in Equestria?"

"I highly doubt it." Luna said.

The gifts passed by: from Weasel, it was a tablet with those weird nursery rhyme videos installed, mostly as a way to keep the baby shut up as they shopped or did anything. Bob gave the two a plushie of himself, though, with Deadpool, he wanted a way to make the plushie into a voodoo doll. Rainbow Dash gave them both her own personal guitar when she was a foal, no doubt believing that their kid could be as a musician as Deadpool. Applejack gave them a cookbook on Apple based recipes. Rarity, meanwhile, gave them some pajamas for the baby, hearing that it was humanoid in shape, but she left a 'Butthole' if the baby had a tail, along with some holes for if it had wings. Fluttershy gave the two some of her birds & squirrels, which, though the two were surprised, were calmed to know that the animals were going to watch over her & do their best to make sure the baby was unharmed. Celestia gave Luna her old crown & necklace that she wore as a filly herself. Stuffy and Crazy, the gentlemen & the insane one, offered themselves to be babysitters, free of charge. Blind Al... she also offered herself to be the babysitter, and was better suit than Crazy & stuffy.

The Taco squad all snickered to themselves.

"Alright," Deadpool said with a smile. "What is it that you got our kid?"

"THIS!!!" They all cheered. Appearing in a puff of smoke was... another Deadpool costume, but different. The first and most noticeable difference was that, instead of it being red as his costume, it was light blue. The second thing he noticed was that, on each hip, there was a crescent moon. The mask had a pointed top, probably for their kid's ears, but a hole was around the forehead, back, and... the butt.

"What... the f**k... is that?" Luna growled.

"It's your child's suit!" Sonata spoke We thought of this ever since the news came out, but we wanted to be prepared."

"Yeah!" Pinkie added "And we've tested it out! Like Edna Mode!"

"Plus, as an added feature." Surprise added "Discord's magic has made sure that it will grow & fit onto your child perfectly, as well as seal it's holes if it doesn't have one, two, or all three features!"

"It was easy." Discord said with a smirk. "And, who knows, maybe your baby will be..." He and the rest of the members stopped and cowered as Luna was growling noticeably, her face red with anger & steaming.

"DOES THOUEST BELIEVE THAT THY CHILD WILL BE LIKE THY HUSBAND!?!?!? MY CHILD WILL NOT BE RICK HER LIFE FOR THE SAKE OF YOUR IDEAS OF 'FUN'!!! SHE'LL- AUGH!!!" Luna fell to the floor, painfully.

"Luna!!!" Deadpool yelled, picking her up. "Oh no! Luna! LUNA!!! Look! it's just an idea, okay!? It's not gonna be like me! For all we know, it-"

"THE BABY!!! I THINK IT'S COMING OUT!!!"

"WHAT!?!?!?" Everyone yelled.

"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!"

"OH S**T!!!" Deadpool picked up Luna and they teleported away! The hospital staff were caught off guard, seeing Deadpool and Luna in labor. "SOMEONE!!! HELP!!! BABY!!!"

"GAH!!! F**K!!! THIS HURST LIKE HELL!!!" The staff ran and took the two to the maternity ward. In their room, the doctor & some nurses put on their scrubs & masks. Deadpool held onto Luna's hoof.

"Come on baby! Push!!! Push!!!"

"I'M... TRYING!!!"

"COME ON!!! PUSH IT!!! PUSH IT LIKE-" Luna's magic gripped Deadpool by his throat, choking him.

"DON'T... USE... YOUR REFERENCES!!!"

"...okay." He wheezed. Then, Luna let out a scream that was so much louder than her royal Canterlot voice. To explain how loud it was, Somewhere, in the galaxy, Starlord, the leader of the Guardians of the Galaxy, woke up from his sleep.

"Mom!?" He asked.

Back in Equestria, The Doctor & Deadpool were blown right out of the room, though the nurses ducked down from the loud scream. Luna felt a large sign of relief from her body. The nurses peeked up. One of them was a unicorn and picked up the child.

"It's a filly!" She said. Luna's sight was too fuzzy to see her daughter, but the child wasn't making any noise. Deadpool came in.

"Oh god!" He yelled "I missed it, didn't I!?" He looked at their child. "Oh... oh God. She's... beautiful!"

"I-I can't see." Luna replied weakly "Wh-what does she look like?"

"Give her here." Deadpool said. The nurse gave him his daughter. "She has the head of a pony & the body of a human, as we saw. She's... covered in tan fur... no tail or wings, yet has hands & feet like a human's. Has a blue horn, surprisingly... seems to have the front part of my hair when I was young... yet has your mane in the back. Nurse... why is she silent?"

"We did everything we could." The nurse said "We... we don't think she's-"

"No! She's going to be fine." He turned his attention to his daughter "Usted es un Wilson. Usted es un guerrero. ¡Lucha!" The baby stayed still, but, after a few seconds, she kicked her legs... tried to grab the air with her arms... threw a right hook... and nodded her head. The boby opened her mouth and cried. "YES!!! Listen! She has a fine set of lungs!"

"Oh... Thank goodness!" Luna said, tearing up. "What are we going to name her? Something that isn't idiotic?"

"Of course, Luna. I already know the perfect name: Neaera!"

"Nearea? That's... that's perfect!"

"Thank you. Greek Goddess of the moon, a species of moth, a plant genus from the amaryllis family, a-"

"GIVE ME MY F***ING BABY!!!"

"AHH!!! Okay! Calm down!" Deadpool sat next to Luna. They both saw their child stop crying and opening her eyes; her right eye was orange like Deadpool's, while her left was Luna's blue eye. "Huh... she has your eye."

"Indeed. But... what is she like? Oh please... don't be an idiot like me!"

"I'm pretty sure she won't be like you."

"D...D-" Neaera spoke.

"Oh my god!" Deadpool said "She's already saying her first word!"

"Told you she was going to be like me." Luna said with a smirk.

"Thank god! Come on! Say Da-Da' Or Daddy!"

"D...D..." Neaera spoke, but said something that caught both off guard. "DAMN DANIEL!!! Back at it again with the white vans!!!" Her parents blinked and stared.

"I spoke too soon." Luna sighed. "Looks like she's your child."

"My child!?" Deadpool replied "Hell no! I don't want my kid spewing dank memes!"

"Well it looks like she's not going to make either of us happy!"

"My thoughts exactly!"

"F**k her right in the p***y!" Neaera shouted.

"LANGUAGE!!!" Deadpool and Luna yelled in unison.

Author's Notes:

Well... this has got to be the strangest child born. More will come, and with less dankness.