You flip the channel on your television.

"Nyeh heh heh! Now then, prepare yourself for the special attack of the great-"

You flip to the next channel on the television.

"There's only one way, Rose! Hold on to something. allons-y!"

You flip from channel to channel in frustration. My god, there is NOTHING good on. All of these overhyped pony shows are driving you nuts. Sure, they're fine at first, but once raging fanbases get behind the shows, they tend to drain away what once made it special.

"Love will thaw-"

You turn off the television and toss the remote onto the couch.

"Well, clearly television isn't for me today. Maybe something else interesting will happen," you mutter.

Your eyes move to the door and you stare for a long, hard moment. You strum your fingers. Birds quietly chip outside.

Then, a yellow pegasus crashes through a window of your living room, shattering glass everywhere.

"Hi Anon!" calls Fluttershy.

"What the ACTUAL SHIT, Fluttershy?!" you scream, rising out of your seat and backing behind the couch. "Why did you just fly through my window?"

"I-I thought I'd mix things up today. You know, add a little spice to our relationship."

"No. Bad Pony," you yell back at her. "We aren't in a relationship."

"O-oh. O-okay," she says, looking away. "Maybe you'll reconsider after my new guess today?"

You groan, placing hand on your forehead.

"Fine, but then you get to clean up this glass and leave. Got it?"

"Sure!" she says, reaching into her saddlebag and pulling out a small red box. "Are sweets your fetish?"

You examine the little red box.

"Is that... Is that pocky?" you ask.

"Well, actually, it's referred to as-"

"Get that fucking weeaboo trash out of my fucking house."

She takes a step back, apparently wounded by your words.

"B-but Anon. Pocky is great. You just have to... to..."

You take three steps towards her, and you hold a finger out at her.

"Don't you fucking-"

"Believe it," she finishes.

Silence falls in the room.

"Fucking get out," you mutter. "And put your fucking anime in the trash."

"O-okay. Bye Anon!"

She spreads her wings, then flies out a completely different window, as it shatters out into your front lawn. You look down at the floor, which is covered in glass and a few droplets of her blood.

"Well shit. Now I've gotta clean up this mess. If only I had a fucking maid or something."

Author's Notes:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0d1EF9Je3_4