It wasn’t the best of burgers, but I have to say that it ranks pretty high, especially since there’s no more Five Guy’s restaurants …

Yes? You have something to ask?

No. Why should I have been worried? Luna was wrong, simple as that. She, obviously was trying to take after her sister too much, so no, I didn’t feel remorse from that argument. She’d get over it eventually.

Anyway.

I guess I was lucky that I was still holding onto the bits that Gilda had lent me. Though I would need to pay her back somehow, and the only time I had actually ever made any of their currency was doing that one job for the Sheriff back Appleloosa. It was a good haul, but it was to pay Trixie back. I couldn’t keep mooching off of her, especially if she decided to part ways tomorrow. That meant I needed a form of money, and rather quickly.

I spent a little bit, just sitting at the cafe and thinking about that fact. While I had talents that could earn me money, I didn’t have any way of getting employed. No doubt they would have the same bureaucracy that our world used to have. That meant registered employment was out of the way … and the only thing I could freelance on would be as security. That was the only job I had equipment for.

A lot of decisions. Not to mention I needed to convince Purple Smart that she should help me return home. Oh and I’m going to casually switch between her real name and the given nickname.

There was a lot of things that I needed to do, and a lot of options to utilize, but I was drawn to the idea of perhaps travelling the world and exploring it like I had done with Earth. It was extremely tempting, but no doubt it would require resources.

Decisions, decisions.

See, I’m not exactly sure why I just keep moving. I’ve had many people call it many things. Some have told me it is wanderlust. That I am making up for all the time that I spent in my youth just living in one place. On the other hand, some tell me that I must be searching for something. I just laugh and reply that if that was the case, then I would have found it by now.

…

No, I’m not running from something. Forty years of being on the move between places, I’m pretty sure that if I was being chased then I would have known it by now.

…

No, now moving o-

I said we’re moving the fuck on! Get that through your fucking thick skull! Can you not hear the words coming out of my fucking mouth? Do I have to drag you closer so you can hear me? I’m not running from something, you half wit!

…

Fine, leave for all I care. Stay or get the fuck gone, I don’t care.

Eventually I decided to leave the cafe and make my way back to the palace, taking my time to enjoy the surprising lack of ponies out on the streets. Must have been a work day or at the very least most ponies followed a rather strict lunch schedule. Who knows why it was empty, but it didn’t bother me one bit, less chances of running into another asshole who would ruin my day.

The walk, like I just said, was quiet though I helped fill the air with a little humming. Nothing special, just a random tune that was stuck in my head. I knew it was from one of my songs, but at the same time I couldn’t really pinpoint it. Even now, I’m having trouble remembering the song, though if I happen to hear it and remember, I’ll make sure to tell you all.

I think I killed about a half an hour while walking back to the castle. Usually my walking pace was always at a speed that was meant to get me somewhere, never meant to sightsee, but I was in no rush to get back to an irate Luna or any other things that could ruin my day. Especially since by this time there had to be a few guards that were expecting me to down a few more shots of absinthe, and tell them about my sex life.

When I finally reached the gates of the castle, the guards were eyeing me up as though they were debating whether or not to allow me access, but they didn’t even move a muscle. I simply walked through to the entrance building where I saw a very familiar group of ponies talking. Though I was more interested in why they were in the entrance building.

“What’s going on?” I asked as I approached them.

“Celestia shut down day court earlier for some reason, though she hasn’t said why, which has caused a massive ruckus in the castle. They’ve kept us from going in,” Twilight said in response. The other ponies barely left their conversations to take note of the newcomer, which was me. Though Gilda did wave at me while she continued to take part in a conversation between Dash and Applejack.

But one thing that Twilight said made me wonder. She was a Princess … why was she barred from the castle? Odd.

“Odd,” I said with a shrug. “Hey, Twilight, can I talk to you? Over there?”

“Sure, I’ll be right back, Trixie,” she said to the blue mare before following me away from the group. “So, what did you want to converse about?”

“... right, can you take a look at something for me?” I said as I reached into the nonexistent bag, since it was in Gilda’s room. “Shit … Gilda still has my gear in her room. I have this smaller bag that was holding what I wanted to show you.”

“Oh,” she said at first before continuing, “was it important?”

“Yeah, it was regarding why I am even here,” I said casually, knowing that would spark the more scientific part of her.

“Really?! Hold on!” she said excitedly before disappearing in a pop of magic. Huh, I didn’t expect that reaction. I figured she would just use her Princess authority or something to get us into the castle, not just disappear in a flash of light.

Well, what could I do but take a seat on the hard floor and wait for her to return. Or at least for something to happen really. One was bound to happen before I got bored enough to leave the castle once again.

But before I could do anything else, or for that matter even contemplate doing something to pass the time, there was another pop or magic and Twilight once again stood in front of me, all of my gear floating in her magic. The whole act had drawn the attention of the rest of the group, who made their way over to see what was going on.

“Here it is! Now quickly! Find what you were going to show me!” she said as she practically bounced in place. I had expected that from Pinkie who I had sworn literally bounced everywhere. Did I forget to mention that? Yeah, instead of walking normally, she just fucking bounced … yeah.

I didn’t respond to Twilight, instead I just dug into the bag that held the statue. It was buried a little under the rest of the items in the bag, but once I withdrew it, there was a general chorus of ‘oohs’ or ‘what is that?’. I simply forked the ivory statue over to Purple Smart who took it up in her magic.

She didn’t say a single word as she turned the thing this way and that. Instead she seemed to be inspecting it for traces of something, and it was clear by the fact her horn often glowed more intensely before dying back down to the regular look it took on when she levitated stuff. At least that’s what it looked like to me. Who knows what she was actually doing.

After a while, she gave a small ‘harumph’ before setting it down on the ground and laying flat in front of it, looking at it from floor level more or less. I was curious as to what she was doing.

“So …” I offered, hoping she would respond.

“Is this actually what brought you here?” she asked, looking up at me while waiting for her answer.

“Yeah, I found it in a buried museum. Touched the thing and it knocked me out with some sort of electrical charge. When I awoke … boom! Here,” I said simply. She continued to look at me for a few seconds before going back to intently staring at it. The rest of the group was following her actions before a certain someone spoke up.

“Right, I’m bored,” Dash said as she gave a fake yawn. I know fake yawns from real ones. Fake ones don’t transmit that goddamned yawn disease or whatever the phenomenon is.

“Shhh!” Twilight hissed loudly at whoever talked. Her horn lit up again but the object didn’t move at all, nor was there any obvious changes going on. I had no clue what she was doing.

After a few more minutes of that, Twilight eventually got back to her hooves and held the object up once more. “Do you know what you have here?”

“A really expensive statue that hates me?” I offered, much to the giggles of a few from the group. Probably Gilda and Dash.

“No,” she said bluntly, not even biting at my quip. “This statue, according to my scans, is extremely old. In fact, it looks as those it could be as old as five thousand years.”

“So … what you’re trying to say is that the statue is … worth a lot of money?” I offered, not really following her line of reasoning.

“Ugh!” she all but shouted before taking a few deep breaths and doing something with her left hoof. “This statue right here is something that has been found before, and the dating via all magical scans tells us that the statues are from the Discordian Era. They were used as ritualistic worship for a small amount of time before ponies began to inscribe them with teleportation runes in order to be able to escape, if for a brief moment from Discord. That’s the idea behind all major papers at least. If there is an alternate reason, it is unknown by Academia.”

“So what you’re saying is … that somehow it found its way to Earth and when I touched it, I got teleported to this world?” I offered, piecing the puzzle pieces together.

“That seems to be the most likely cause. Now before you suggest it, and I can tell you want to, but no, I can’t just inscribe more teleportation runes onto it. The real trick is to find some sort of signature that would allow me to trace a route back to your home world,” she said with a hoof directed at me to silence any stupid comments.

“What’s the time frame we’re looking at?” I asked, hoping for something short.

“Bare minimum, a month. That’s assuming that my research goes according to plan and that there is indeed a traceable thaumic signature. I can only imagine the time scale would be upwards after that,” she said with a frown. “Could be years for all I know if the right setbacks happen.”

“Huh,” I said, sitting and staring at the ivory statue that I really wanted to toss against a wall. “At least that makes up my mind for me.”

“I don’t follow,” Twilight said.

“Oh, I was debating on what I would do until I could go home. Since we’re looking at a month worth of time at least, I’m probably going to skedaddle and venture around. You know, see the the world and its many sights, that sort of thing.”

None of the ponies really said a word at that, though there was a look in Gilda’s eyes that said she had something to say. It never came, however. Instead, I got up from where I was, grabbing my stuff and swinging it over my shoulder. “You can keep that blasted thing. It’s done me no good. Call me or whatever if you make some sort of breakthrough.”

“Wait! Don’t leave!” a congregation of voices said. Well more like two or three voices.

“What? I was just going to find my room and drop my stuff off,” I said simply, looking at them in confusion. At my statement, the entire group looked a little sheepish as though they had been caught doing something they shouldn’t have.

They didn’t say anything after that, as I walked away into the castle. I had barely crossed the threshold of the entrance hall when I thought I heard another chorus of ‘wait’ but I wasn’t sure, so I just kept walking forward. For the castle being closed or whatever, there was a surprising lack of guards enforcing that rule. Luckily, I happened to walk past two guards when I climbed the stairs.

“Hey, do you guys know where my room is? I never ended up going to it,” I said to them.

They looked at each other for a moment before nodding. One of them walked away while the other motioned for me to follow him. I obliged and followed the guard down the various halls. It was a very uninteresting trek, let me tell you that.

When it was done, I was left standing in front of a set of doors that looked a little less like a visitor’s door and more like some ornate piece that would be the door to Celestia’s or Luna’s chambers. Though not necessarily theirs, but you get what I mean. It definitely didn’t look like the doors belonged to a visitor’s bedroom.

I tentatively pushed the door open, expecting to find Celestia on the other side of the door. Luckily from what I could tell at first glance, she wasn’t in the room, nor in the general vicinity. That could change with a simple cast of teleportation magic for all I know, so I kept my guard up. I figured that Celestia would probably do some sort of payback or something. Why did I feel like that? I’m not completely sure why to be honest, but it’s always safer expecting something that never comes than the opposite.

I made my way over to the bed and sat on the side for a second. It was fucking comfy as hell. Like something that was beyond compare. I could only dream of such a bed, prior to that moment. I nearly tossed my pack and the rest of my carryable gear off me before flopping backwards into the bed and giving a little sigh. I had slept on so many hard surfaces that laying on something so soft was beyond my comprehension. There was a little nagging in the back of my mind from past experience that told me that I should be ready to have it ripped away from me.

Then came a knock on the door. I gave out a loud groan, thinking that I had predicted my own future by thinking such horrible things. Eventually I pulled myself off the bed and made my way to the door. I was making mock bets in my head on whether it was going to be Gilda, Twilight, Celestia, Luna, or Shining Armor.

When I opened the door, I lost all of my bets.

Remember how I said Pinkie was blindly pink? Well I found the second place, runner-up without even trying.

Standing in front of me was a pink alicorn, not much smaller than Luna. She was more like Twilight in ways because her mane didn’t decide to fuck over physics and do the wave bullshit that Celestia and Luna’s manes did. Instead it kind of bounced … and hung around the pink mare’s head like it was part of a scarf or something.

“Can I help you?” I asked the smiling alicorn.

“I expected you to be bigger … though I do enjoy gruff ones!” she said with a sultry smile. I squinted at her for a moment before reacting.

“Right, I’m just going to slowly close this here door and forget that this happened,” I said cautiously before slowly closing the door. The pink alicorn didn’t move nor did she change the look she was giving me. In fact she even tried to make the look even more … sexual. Yeah, let’s go with that.

I was about to get the door closed when a hoof stopped it. “Now, now, that isn’t how you treat a lady. In fact, if you remove those clothes, I’ll show you how to treat a lady.”

She threw open the door with a surprising amount of strength. I was more or less powerless to stop her from entering the room. Instead, all I did was back the fuck up across the room with the mare advancing on me, swaying her hips in a very over-exaggerated motion. She couldn’t really see my eyes but they were bugged out by what was happening. I was being sexually assaulted by a mare from another world. If it was a random woman from our world, well I might have been down or I might not have, really depending on the mood…

This though … she was a pony … way too similar to our world even with the whole sapience thing. There was no way I was getting involved with the closest thing to bestiality. That was my thought at the time, things change though ...

“Playing hard to get? I do love a bit of foreplay before being rutted till I can’t walk!” she said, her tone never leaving that sultry one she started off with.

Right, I could only think of one thing to do to deal with this situation. Well two of them actually, but the first one involved me assaulting possible royalty. The second option was much more viable.

“Fine, you’ve got me, though it's been awhile, and I’m feeling a little more kinky than usual. How about out on the balcony?” I said gesturing to the balcony door that was apart of the room. She seemed to beam at that idea.

“Ooh, a little bit of an exhibitionist streak in you, huh? You’re making me wet in anticipation, big boy,” she said lewdly. Right, I couldn’t take much more or that.

I quickly moved to her and picked her up in the same way you would pick up a dog. When I picked her up, she squeaked lightly but when she realized where we were going, she cooed in response, giving me looks of lust or whatever as I moved to the balcony with her in my arms. Thankfully her horn lit up to open the door, which was done in a swift flick of her head.

As we stepped out on the balcony she stopped making those sounds, instead switching back to talking. “Well, how should we start? Perhaps you want me to suckle on your meat for a while?”

“Yeah … about that …” I said before chucking her off the balcony.

She got good air at least.

I knew she had wings, so I wasn’t really playing a dangerous game there, but I didn’t bother to check if she opened them. Oh well, if I was going to kill royalty as least my story would be interesting.

So I slowly backed up into my room before locking the balcony door once I shut it. I then proceeded to pull the curtains over the door, blocking out all light. Then strode across the room, locked the main door, before picking up my bags and promptly barricading myself in the attached bathroom.

By barricading, I mean I utilized every moveable item to block the door that thankfully swung inwards. Not the greatest moment for me, but I was expecting the Royal Guard to burst down the door and take me by force.

Regardless, the door did slam open, though.

“Aha! I knew we’d …” Shining’s muffled voice cut through my room, much to my confusion. “Cady? Ryan? Why are the curtains drawn closed?”

“Wait, he’s not in there?” another voice cut in. One that sounded suspiciously like Candlelight’s. “But Princess Cadance got into the room! Where are they?”

There had to be at least four of them … and I took a guess and figured it was the group I left behind at the Officer’s Club.

“I don’t know … they’re obviously not in here,” Shining said with confusion.

“You mean I gave up eating out Star Luck for this! Gah!” Candlelight announced, which was followed by a squeak which I took to be said mare.

“Well, I guess we better-” Shining said, but was cut off by an extremely loud frustrated yell.

“Where is he! I’ll kill him for that!” Cadance said in a very angry voice, stomping into the room. In fact this was the angriest I had heard anypony be up to that point.

“There you are, Cady - woah, what happened?” Shining asked rather innocently.

“He threw me off the balcony!” she yelled. “I was lucky there was a shrub to break my fall!”

Apparently some alicorns and pegasi were unable to open their wings in panic or something like that. That was my only explanation for how she didn’t correct her fall. The good news was that I didn’t commit regicide. At least I had that going for me.

“You know, he could be in the bathroom,” Horizon said. Dammit, I was fucked.

“Lemme at him!” Cadance shrieked before the door took a brunt force impact. I was glad I used those dressers to block the door. The door glowed and rattled a fair amount, but thankfully I had wedged those dressers and chairs in there well.

“What a way to go … it was Cadance, in the bathroom with … herself!” I muttered before chuckling at my little reference.

“I can hear him! You will wish you were never born!” Cadance yelled as the door glowed even more intensely and kept on rattling.

“Cady, honey, calm down. It was just a misunderstanding. No one needs to die,” Shining said in a nervous voice, though it apparently did no good as the door just glowed more.

Suddenly a piece of the door exploded towards me, nearly taking off my head. I was lucky to duck in time. When I looked back up, I saw Cadance’s face looking at me through the not very large hole in the door.

“Here’s Cadance!” she shouted with a maniacal grin. I didn’t even tremble in fear, instead reacting to the fact that she had quoted The Shining out of nowhere.

“How the fuck do you know The Shining?” I asked aloud. Though apparently she didn’t hear, for another piece of door exploded, thankfully this time not even close in taking my head off.

Want to know what happened next?

White light.

Me on the floor dry heaving.

I got teleported the fuck out of there.

“Once … I’m done … heaving up my stomach … I’ll give you a hug,” I said in between heaves, not even caring who just teleported me away. All I knew was it wasn’t my room since my room had a rug floor and I was crouched over on tile.

“Oh, I don’t think that’s necessary … I don’t think you’ll want to be hugging me shortly,” Celestia said in a rather serious tone.

I didn’t bother to respond, though I was trying to understand what I had done wrong to garner such a serious tone. Perhaps throwing Cadance over the balcony was going to get me in trouble, even though she still lived. Of course, I could always defend myself by saying that she advanced on me and I was pretty sure Shining and his bat pony friends were in on it.

I kept heaving for a little bit longer, but unfortunately I didn’t puke. Why unfortunately? Because when you actually let go and let your lunch or whatever out onto the floor it feels better than having to go through the motions but having nothing coming out.

That and it might have derailed whatever Celestia wanted to talk to me about. As it stands, like I said, I was about done.

“Fuck … I hate teleporting,” I murmured as I stood up, a little wobbly still, but at least I wasn’t on my knees anymore.

“Quite,” Celestia said with that serious voice. I finally got a good look at her and she was sitting on a cushion, staring at me with a glare that probably could have melted those steel beams. Heh, memes.

I knew that there was no choice but to talk to her about whatever she wanted to talk about, but on the flipside, I didn’t have to actually be apart of the conversation if I didn’t want to be. That’s the great thing about free choice. Yet in the end, my morals won out and I decided to sit on a cushion and listen to her speak.

Listen, I’m going to skip the conversation because let’s be honest, it wasn’t all that vital to the story, nor did she say anything that was of importance. She tried to get me to reason out my actions regarding that douchebag of a pony I’d met earlier. I told her very clearly why I did what I did and she actually listened to it and accepted it. That was the jist of the conversation.

So let’s move on.

“I’m going to talk, and you are going to listen, Ryan,” Celestia said in her serious tone to the sitting human. He just nodded his head, maintaining direct eye contact the entire time. “I know nothing or your world aside from what you have told me and from what your eyes have expressed. Do not doubt that I don’t judge somepony, or someone in this case, based on their situation. I have spent many years learning from mistakes, others’ and my own alike.”

“So I must wonder why one, such as yourself, chose to act as they did when confronted with a situation that had no grounds for confrontation,” she continued. Ryan attempted to speak to defend himself, but she cut Ryan off with a glowing of her horn, and he closed his mouth to prevent further escalation. “I said don’t speak, just listen.”

She waited to see if he would try to respond again. When he made no move to do so, she continued. “You’ve made the observation before, Ryan, that this world is nothing like yours, especially in this country of Equestria. We are a peaceful nation, and for the most part, a peaceful world, that has not felt the touch of true war or true fighting for many, many years. We have striven hard, not just Equestria, but all nations to keep a peace as long as we have. What little conflict there has been has been solved with little to no bloodshed. Even when Canterlot was invaded a few years back, it was stopped without having to resort to violence on the scale that you have described. The event was over before it even began. So it pains me to see confrontation on such trivial grounds. It pains me even more that it has caused such a negative ripple across Canterlot.”

“So please, tell me why you chose to act instead of walking away,” Celestia said, looking at Ryan with disappointment. He didn’t respond at first, proceeding to brood over her question while looking at the plush carpet floor before eventually looking up at Celestia.

“You’re arrogant to assume that there isn’t fighting or lack of peace in your nation, Celestia,” Ryan said with a stolid look on his face. “I did what I fucking did because the scum not only insulted your sister, but went after my entire species as though we were of less value than mud. How can I just walk away from that?”

“If you give them a reason to react, then they will react. That is the nature of those who pick on the weak,” Ryan continued. “But if you go beyond what they want to do, then they fear trying to do it again. They say violence leads to more violence, bah! It only leads to more if you allow them to be able to resort to violence. He fucking learned his place.”

“This is not your home anymore, Ryan! Your way of thinking is not one that we subscribe to. You and I both know that as long as you are here, you need to act as if you are a part of Equestria. Is it so hard to not resort to violence?” Celestia asked. “Can you not see who you have hurt?”

“You can’t teach an old dog new tricks, Celestia. You have a mind capable of processing thousands of years and realising mistakes from afar. Try walking in a mortal’s shoes and you’ll see that none of us can see the outcomes of everything. I am who I am, and there is nothing that will change that. Besides, who says I even want to be a part of your ‘society’. I’m leaving tomorrow regardless of how long I’m stuck here. So don’t worry, you won’t have me in your majestic fucking hair for long,” Ryan said before picking himself off the cushion, grabbing his gear and walking out the door.

Celestia made no movement to stop him. Despite Ryan’s broken and jaded argument, he had a valid point. She had been alive for so long … perhaps she had forgotten what it was like to be mortal. If anything, she just hoped that Luna and him could make amends.

After all, she would deal with the nobles that were asking for his head.

So after Celestia and I had our nice discussion, I decided to make my way back to my room … wherever it was. I had to ask another guard to escort me there, this time really taking note of the pathway, which was good because we passed the dining room on the way. At least I would know which way to take when supper was going to be served.

When I got back to my room, I saw three ponies standing in front of the door. Specifically, three bat ponies.

“Finally! Celestia knows how long it took for Shining to calm her down,” Horizon said as he spotted me coming down the hall. “You better get in there and clear things up.”

I simply gave them a raised eyebrow in response before entering my room to see Shining holding Cadance as they sat on the lone couch in the room. They looked more than a little worn out. Also my furniture was back to its proper position … though my bathroom door still had a hole in it.

“So … am I still being charged with regicide?” I asked before tossing my bags onto the bed, the soft cushion easily absorbing the impact.

“Heh …” Shining muttered while rubbing the back of his neck. “This is actually my fault. See, I wanted to pull a prank on you for leaving the bar earlier … and corner you into finally answering that question … though that part was all Candlelight’s idea. So I drafted Cadance … and well …”

“Ah,” I said as I started to pull off some of my gear. I realised, while huddled in the bathroom, that I could probably take a shower for the first time in awhile, so I figured I might as well. I’d also need to wash my clothes …

“Cadance was supposed to seduce you and then we were going to catch you in the act and use it as blackmail to make you speak … though you know what happened,” he said with a light chuckle.

“Ah, so this is your wife …” I said, finally getting the implications.

“Hi,” Cadance said sheepishly. It was obvious she felt bad about the recent series of events.

“Hi,” I replied back as I continued to pull off my layers, neatly stacking them in place on the bed. I was down to my main jacket and pants, all my gear in a net pile on the bed.

“I’m sorry for the freak out … it’s been a rough couple of weeks,” she said with a light chuckle. I wanted to dismiss that as an excuse, but I noticed that she looked a bit round in the stomach from the way she was sitting, and not in the pudgy way. You know what I mean, so it made some sense.

“Congratulations,” I said, not really taking my attention away from what I was doing.

“Oh! Thank you,” Cadance said from behind me, her voice lightening a little. “It’s our second. It’s only been a few months but it’s been much rou-”

She stopped talking as I proceeded to make Cadance taste her own medicine. I didn’t pay it too much mind, the removal of my jacket and my undershirt felt too good. I hadn’t let my skin breathe for a long time, or at least it felt like that. I enjoyed the feeling of the air on my skin; you’d know the feeling if you wore the same all-encompassing clothing for weeks at a time as well.

I turned around to find Cadance trying to look away from me with an embarrassed look on her face, and Shining shaking his head with his eyes closed.

“You two alright?” I asked them, a little worried, but my worries were put to rest.

“Yeah,” Shining said his voice wavering slightly. “We’re fine.”

“Solid. Anyway, I’m going to take a shower, been too long since I’ve had one. I’m amazed none of you have said anything,” I said as I made my way to the shower, everything I needed in hand. Yeah, even despite travelling in a Wasteland, I kept a toiletry bag! Funny how some things always stick, huh?

“Oh, and don’t worry about the prank. As long as I don’t get charged with attempted regicide, we’re all good,” I said as I opened the bathroom door, but I took one look at it before amending my previous statement. “Oh, and if I also didn’t charged for this. So … uhh, you can let yourselves out when you wish, I guess.”

With that, I closed the bathroom door behind me and started up the shower. Yes, I’m going to talk about the shower, only because it’ll hopefully make you all realise just how lucky you have it to have showers in your village.

Let me tell you, having a hot shower for the first time in what was probably years … it was fucking glorious. It felt like I was being massaged all over and that my muscles could finally stop being ready to jump away from something. I don’t think there was a better feeling right then and there.

If there was one thing I was going to miss when I left Equestria, it was this shower specifically.

It was like years of tension had been melted away in only a few seconds. I could have stood in that shower forever with the way it felt, but I knew that my legs would give out eventually. Maybe there was something to actually staying in towns, I pondered. Up until then, and until now really, I never stayed inside any town, instead finding a place somewhat near the edge of town that would provide me shelter. I never trusted people enough to just let myself be boxed in and taken advantage of.

Eventually I finished washing up, scrubbing off the grit and grime that had accumulated and finally feeling clean for the first time in awhile. It was a refreshing feeling, to say the least. Also, I was glad I didn’t have any hair on my head to wash … my beard takes up enough shampoo as it is.

When I finally got out of the shower I felt like I was missing something in life … though at the same time something was different from how I remembered it. I used to hate getting out of the shower because the cold air always nipped at you after being doused in hot water. In that bathroom though … there was no cold air; it was as though I had merely turned the shower’s temperature down a little. Let’s say that it was another thing that made me want to stay in that world … though not a big enough reason.

So with a towel wrapped around my waist, I poked my head out the door to see if the two had left, which they already did. So I decided to get changed, but in this situation I needed to get my clothes cleaned. That and possibly patched up, which meant I would need to find someone that could work on rather short notice … I’d have to look.

So I got dressed in my backup pants and a shirt I kept from all the way back then. Even two decades later, it still had little wear and tear to it. It was the only band t-shirt that Kreator sold on their tour. The shirt pictured a demon, that Kreator often used, standing in front of a demonic looking background, while it held the Canadian flag. So many good memories all woven in the fabric of that shirt. I still have it, mind you, but it feels nostalgic nonetheless.

I checked in the mirror and felt like I was missing so much, though that was also true because I was no longer wearing my standard gear and flak jacket. That could be remedied quickly.

So I slipped my body armor over me, and strapped my ammo belt on. Essentially everything that I normally carried, minus my packs, was back on. Also I decided to forgo the hat for the time being since my head needed a little bit of a tan.

When I decided to look back into the mirror, it wasn’t like looking at a survivor anymore. I looked like the typical jackass hired merc. You know the type that was always shown in movies? The ones that are portrayed as complete badasses, yet they are either the bad guy or they get easily killed? Yeah, I nearly laughed myself into a fit at the sight.

I didn’t really care though, this was so I could get my clothes cleaned, not try to look like a pretentious douchebag.

So I shouldered my jacket, shirt, pants, socks, and underwear and made my way out of my room. Luckily for me, it was at this time that the rest were coming down the hall to their rooms, which were apparently next to mine.

“Woah dude, looking pretty rad there,” Rainbow said as she zipped over, “didn’t know you were so ripped! Bet I could still tak- holy Celestia!”

I gave her an odd look from behind my glasses, why was she freaking out all of a sudden? I looked over to the rest, who had quickly gotten over to see what was wrong, but as they approached they all took on rather horrified looks as well. Well, Fluttershy and Pinkie looked horrified; Pinkie to the point her hair was deflating … literally. Twilight had a face that was more in line with someone who was curious as to what they were seeing … or as to the reason. Applejack had her eyes open a little and gave a sharp whistle as she looked my arms up and down, while Rarity had fainted, though she had also grabbed my clothes in her magic before fainting. My guess was the reaction was to my clothes. Gilda and Trixie were the more calm out of the group but Trixie had a very similar face to Twilight’s, while Gilda looked a little bit distant.

“Seriously, what is with you ponies? First Shining and Cadance do this, now you all? What are you shocked about?” I asked, becoming a little impatient at the constant reactions of horror.

“Your … your … arms,” Pinkie managed to blurt out despite her nearing the brink of tears. I looked down at them to find … my arms. Nothing special, no abnormalities, just my arms. Hell, they got to see my tattoos, but I don’t see why that was a big deal.

“And?”

“And? Dude; can’t you see?! What happened to your arms?” Dash said from her position in the air. Once again I looked down at them to find nothing of issue, so I decided to look over at Gilda, who didn’t have as big of a reaction, but her eyes showed concern.

“Anyone got any clue what is going on, because I’m lost,” I asked. She took a moment longer to look at the group who were wincing in some way, or in Fluttershy’s and Pinkie’s case, nearly crying. Eventually she looked back at me.

“The scars … it’s the scars,” she said.

Part of me let out a massive ‘oh’ in understanding, but at the same time it amazed me that this reaction was because of some scars on my arms. I had scars all over my body; it’s what happens in life on a apocalyptic world, so I was still confused why it was such a big deal.

No, I’m not going to show you, but I guess I might as well tell you. Prior to The Reckoning, there were hardly any scars on my body; just a few, no more than an average guy really. After two decades of brutal survival? Well, you could say that the amount of scars shot through the roof. I only had three sections of my body that had bad scarring. First was my chest because you can only take so many blasts and firefights without getting numerous scars. Most of it was from before I found my current body armor, but still, it was easily visible. The other two places were actually the two places they could see.

Both of my arms had gotten beat up through my journeys. You accidently fail to dodge a knife slash and you’ve gotten one scar. You use your arms to shield your face from something … another scar. Break a bone in your arm, good chance of another scar. Those first two happened often compared to the broken bone one … that only happened once. Still, I had intersecting scars running up and down my arms.

No, not that intense, you nitwit. They intersected a few times but for the most part, the scars just took up small portions of my arm. Sure, they were noticeable, but I didn’t think they were worthy of such attention.

“So what? They’re scars. You live long enough and do dangerous enough stuff, you get them,” I said, all the while wondering why I was still standing there, letting a fainted or should I say ‘fainted’ Rarity hold my clothes in her magic.

“But … but,” Pinkie said. I crouched a little and looked them all in the eye.

“I’m going to be a little crass with how I put this, but you have to understand it from how I think of it. To me, these are nothing more than signs that I am still alive, so when I look at them, only one thing comes to mind. Shit happens,” I said before tussling the pink pony’s mane. “I still walk and breathe in front of you, so these scars are hardly important.”

“Don’t they hurt though?” Fluttershy asked a little timidly. “I mean … if you want to … um talk about it.”

“Nah, they’re really old at this point … well, most of them. Either way, they don’t hurt; never have really,” I said with a shrug. This seemed to cause Pinkie to completely rebound from her ‘flatness.’

“Phew, for a second there I was afraid you were hurting! I don’t like seeing my friends hurting because that means they are in pain and if they are pain then something’s wrong, and if something’s wrong the-” Pinkie said before Applejack put a hoof in her mouth, cutting her off from continuing whatever she was saying.

Yes, I knew what she was saying … how else could I retell you it? I just didn’t know what she was saying after the hoof was stuffed in her mouth.

“Right, now that that’s out of the way, anyone mind telling me why Rarity is holding my clothes and still fainted?” I asked, pointing over to the unicorn that had fainted onto a couch. Yes, a fucking couch of all things. How it got there? I don’t fucking know. It baffled me but was hardly the most important things.

“Naw, ole’ Rares ain’t fainted. She’s just being dramatic and such,” Applejack said as she removed her hoof from Pinkie’s mouth, who had stopped talking just before she did that. “Watch.”

She went over to Rarity, and stood beside her before clearing her throat. “Princess Luna and Twi are secretly gettin’ hitched!”

“What!?” Rarity jumped up in pure shock, only to find the group around her slightly chuckling at what had just happened. She looked down from the couch to see Applejack holding back a snicker. “That was not very nice, darling.”

“Why are you holding onto my clothes?” I asked, rather serious despite the giggling of the ponies.

“Oh … um, I figured that you were getting rid of your garish clothes from before. I’d be happy to make something for you! It would be a fantastic challenge for me, and you would finally have something marvelous to wear!” she said with a little too much drama.

“Yeah, no thanks. I’m trying to find a place to wash them and then patch up some spots. I’m not the best at needle work, or I would do it by myself … already learned it’s better to let someone else work the needle,” I said, barely mumbling that last part. They didn’t need to know that I wasn’t referring to clothes for that.

“You. Want. To. Keep. These?” Rarity asked through a strained voice.

“Practicality over fashion … darling,” I said with a little flair to make fun of her word choice. She merely rolled her eyes while the rest giggled.

“Hmph. Well, I was thinking of helping you, but I’m not sure anymore,” Rarity said as she turned her head away from me. As expected, she was trying to bait me into falling for her trap of allowing her to make my clothes.

“Nah, it’s okay. I think I saw some stores that do repairs. I’ve still got Gilda’s bits-”

“Hey!”

“-So I’m good for a bit,” I said, ignoring Gilda’s protest. She’d get them and more back, I just needed to use them for a bet. I was already thinking up an idea that I could use to gain a good amount of money.

Rarity’s eyes narrowed in a rather vicious death glare at what I was implying. Sure, she had known me first, but if she was going to play this game, I was willing to go around her and to other businesses just to spite her.

“Oh no, you don’t. I will have these clothes washed and sewn up, like they were brand new! You don’t even have to pay, just let me take your measurements,” Rarity said with an air of finality, as though it was her final offer.

“Well, I’m leaving tomorrow so I need everything done today … and I need to do some stuff as well before I leave,” I said, not realising the mistake I was making by saying that.

Instead of Rarity, the rest of the group burst in, by yelling a rather synchronised “What?!”

“Oh, yeah … I decided that I’m going to wander around or something till Purple Smart’s done with the statue,” I said with a shrug.

There were a lot of comments coming from the ponies, but I couldn’t get a bearing on any of them specifically. They rambled for a second before Twilight spoke up, “Girls! Quiet!”

That got them to stop except Pinkie, who finished off with, “And that’s how John Cena made Equestria!”

Don’t bother asking. I just filled it away as if I never heard it. Yep, I’m pretty sure that was an improvised line.

“We were planning on leaving as well, since we can’t stay in Canterlot forever,” Twilight said towards me. “Would you at least come back to Ponyville before you go?”

“Ehh, why not. Stock up on supplies and stuff,” I said with a shrug.

“Perfect! We can get everything sorted out and you can even allow Rarity to take measurements,” Twilight said. Yay, right?

“Then it’s settled! Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to go find some gullible guards,” I said before turning and walking away, but as I turned, I noticed one last thing: it was Gilda looking a little more than sad.

“Hey, Gilda; want to come along? We can get some drinks after if we make the right bets,” I offered to her. That seemed to perk her up a little as she limped her way towards me. I noticed she wasn’t wearing my splint on her foreleg anymore. I wanted to ask, but I chalked it up to the doctors or at least some sort of skilled practitioner.

We walked down the hallway for a bit before I decided to break the silence. “So what did you get up to today?”

“Nothing much, really,” she said casually. “Got the splint removed, then got a tour of Canterlot. It was bucking boring.”

“Eh, I kind of know what you mean,” I said. “Though I thought the Equestrian Museum of Natural History was pretty cool.”

She looked disappointed at me for a second. Of course, she probably still had reservations about doing stuff that she thought was lame; that was probably the reason she was giving me such a queer look.

“Hey, don’t give me that look. I might be a fucking badass but I’m as much of a dork at times as Purple Smart,” I said, raising my hands in defense as I gave her a grin. She merely shook her head and chuckled a little at me.

We kept walking until we finally found an exit that would hopefully lead us closer to the guards’ training ground. I remembered the way, but not from inside the castle.

“So, what’s your plan to get my bits back?” she asked as we exited the castle into the eastern gardens or whatever they were called. Not paying much attention to her question, I realized I knew my way to the training ground the moment we got outside. It was the same route I took the first time, and hopefully I would see some familiar faces or something. Though in retrospect, why I even assumed that was beyond me, considering they all looked the same.

Annoyed at me not having answered her question, Gilda decided to wait until we got to the training grounds.

“So are you going to tell me what your plan is?” she asked, obviously a little irritated I didn’t answer her the first time.

“The ‘plan’ is resting on my back right now,” I said with a smirk. She gave a small ‘oh’ before grinning as well. She didn’t know my skill but she must have realised that I was going to play off their naivety with weapons or something along those lines.

Eventually, we found our way to the Officer’s Club with not a single pony stopping us, surprisingly enough. I would have thought that at least one pony or another would have realised that neither of us were a part of the guard. In fact, I found it weird that a few ponies had given me a nod as we passed by. Huh.

I pushed open the doors to the Officer’s Club to see that it was surprisingly full of ponies; not just bat ponies, but also regular ponies that were not all fucking white! In fact, there was a myriad of colours, yet they all wore that golden armour that all the guards wore. I stared for a few moments before deciding to just shrug it off and file it under ‘Magical Bullshit.’

“Hey, Ryan! Over here,” I heard from to my right. I looked over to see two ponies who I had no clue who they were, but the voice I heard was familiar. There was a pegasus that was white with dappled grey from what I could see. His mane was a black mohawk that reminded me of some sort of punk rocker, though not as bad … at least it wasn’t neon green or something. The other pony was a unicorn that had a darker red coat and a rather sharp orange mane. Truly ponies were of every type of colour.

“Do I know you two?” I asked rather bluntly as I made my way over to them.

They looked at each other before a spark of realisation flickered in their eyes and they laughed. The pegasus was the first to speak after the laughter. “Yeah, it’s us; Wind Shear and Sigil!”

I would never had guessed it was them. I had to actually do a double take before finally sitting down, Gilda pulling up a seat beside me. “Well, I wouldn’t have believed my eyes … and here I thought you all were white.”

“Nah, just a guard enchantment on the helmets,” Sigil said before taking a sip of his beer. “So what brings you to the bar … and who’s this griffon?”

“Oh right. Gilda, this is Wind Shear and Sigil. They were my main conspirators in my prank on Luna,” I said before turning to them. “Wind Shear, Sigil, this is Gilda, the first one to find me when I came to this world.”

They exchanged pleasantries before a waiter came around asking if we wanted anything. I just asked for water, while Gilda asked for some ale. It earned a funny look from the two guards.

“No alcohol right now, I need to keep my head on my shoulders if I want to make some money,” I said to them, which caught their attention more than the lack of alcohol being ordered on my part. They opened their mouths to ask, but I cut them off before they could. “I owe Gilda some bits, so I figured that I can make some money off bets … non-alcoholic ones. Know any ponies willing to take a bet on target practice? Preferably ones who don’t realise the bet is lost from the start?”

I gave them a wolfish grin at the mention of what I was doing. I didn’t mind getting them in on the whole thing, as long as in the end I came out with more bits than I really needed. The only real question was whether they were going to help, or they were only going to watch.

“Gullible types? I think we can help,” Wind Shear said with a smirk.

“For a price?” I asked with a raised brow. There had to be a catch.

“Nah, we already extorted you earlier,” Sigil said with a dismissive wave of his hoof. “Besides, the ponies I’m thinking of need to be put in their place.”

“Yeah, just give us a few minutes. But how do you want to play this?” Wind Shear asked.

“Boasting. Tell them some false story about me saying I could out range any unicorn or guard. Something to that effect, I trust you two to play it up enough to get some bets. Make sure it’s specifically about range or accuracy … or both,” I stated before a thought crossed my mind that I was a little curious about. “Wait … do you guys have crossbows or anything? I mean, I’m using a gun … you do know what those are right?”

“Yeah, we have crossbows, we do know what guns are, though you won’t find any here. And don’t worry, we’ll round the ponies up; you just have to prove them wrong,” Wind Shear said, before hammering back his beer and departing the table. Sigil followed behind him.

“Think you’ve got a chance?” Gilda asked, a little skeptical of my plan.

“Listen, even if they make me use a crossbow, I can still shoot well enough. I don’t have a lot of practice with a crossbow but I know the math behind the arrow,” I said with a grin. That wasn’t a lie, either. It wasn’t something that was drilled into my head, or that I really needed to know, but I was taught it by this Russian in Siberia. When you run out of bullets, you resort to something easier to create. “As long as range is involved I’m one of the best from my world, if not the best.”

Still untested, so I can still claim it.

So Gilda and I drank for a little bit, in almost complete silence until finally Wind Shear and Sigil came back to the table, a group of ten plus ponies behind them.

“Ready to lose your bits?” Wind Shear asked with a wink.

“You should be asking them that,” I said, pointing to the group, as I stood up. Yeah, we had to act a little to make sure they didn’t figure out that I was playing them.

So we went outside, the group having gotten a little larger, probably due to some overhearing the bet. I was hoping Wind Shear wasn’t going to fuck me over in some way, shape, or form. He was essentially setting the whole thing up, so I had to trust that he knew what he was doing. When we exited the bar, the group of four from earlier came trotting up. How the bat ponies were still awake despite pulling night shifts was beyond me.

“What’s going on here?” Shining, who was at the helm of the group, asked. I only then noticed that there was actually a fifth with them, specifically, Cadance. Huh, wonder what she was doing with them.

“Nothing, Sir!” Wind Shear and the rest said in a garbled mess of replies. He didn’t buy it for a second, instead looking up to me with an expectant expression. I was taking a gamble by telling the truth about it, but I had nothing to lose.

“Some of your guard think they are better at target practice than me,” I replied cooly.

“Really? Well don’t let me stop you from humiliating yourself. In fact I want to see how badly the Guard beats you!” Shining said with a boastful manner that seemed odd coming from him. My guess was that either he was secretly really competitive or that he had something planned.

I shrugged in reply, before following the group once more, this time over to what looked like their ‘firing range.’ It wasn’t anything special, dividers in between stalls, with dummy pony-shaped targets at the end that were positioned so the side was facing us. Well it was just the general shape of a four legged creature. I didn’t really care as to what they were supposed to be.

“Hey, can I have a second to adjust?” I asked Wind Shear, who was guiding everyone around to sitting areas. He simply looked at me for a second before nodding.

I pulled my M110 off my back, and flipped the bipod open before unloading it completely and setting it on the ground. I needed to fix it with its stock sound suppressor before I could fire it. I didn’t want there to be that loud of a sound in a city … might cause some minor panic or something like that.

The suppressor was merely an extension of the barrel; really, all I had to do was unscrew the flash suppressor at the end, and then slip the sound suppressor over the barrel and attach it to the railing at the end. Very easy.

When I went into the prone position, I could feel a few curious stares at me, but I shrugged them off. I paused for a second, expecting to feel the breeze, but the dividers that were in between each stall made it nearly impossible. I really hoped Gilda was still next to me.

“What’s the breeze, Gilda?” I asked casually, not even looking away from the scope.

“Easterly, at seven kilometers,” she said as though she was reading a script. “We’re also facing east.”

“Thanks, I said before adjusting for the stated wind variations. I really hoped that my scope had kept its original adjustments. The running earlier could have easily thrown it off, the only bad thing about having it on your back when carrying it.

I didn’t aim for a target, instead looking at the dirt mound behind the targets, aiming for a specific section that had a little bit of grass in it. A direct hit meant that I was good to go, if not, then I needed to adjust.

Breath in, breath out. Nice and calm. Small tension. Faint pop.

On target.

The ponies wouldn’t know what hit them. I stood back up, with my rifle still occupying its spot on the ground. I just needed to wait until the bets and everything else were cleared. So I waited patiently, Horizon coming over to me during the time where Wind Shear was taking bets and the challenges. Gilda made sure to get in and place our bet, which was nearly all of what I had left out of her original sum.

“What are you trying to pull?” Horizon asked me with a suspicious eye.

“Nothing, just trying to win some money,” I asked nonchalantly, trying to not give away the game.

“Sure, you are … you’re not taking my money. I can see it by what you just did there. Those idiots in the Solar Guard didn’t see it but I did,” Horizon said with a smirk that showed off his fangs. “Take ‘em for they’re worth.”

“I will … and I’m not playing a game. I’m just good,” I said with an equally large smirk. He laughed and headed back to his fellow bat ponies. I watched as he whispered something to them, which caused Candlelight’s eyes to go wide before she seemed to stuff a bag back under her armour.

“Human, you ready?” Wind Shear came over to me.

“Yeah, what’s the game and whose challenging?” I asked simply.

“Straight Lance here says he can hit the target at maximum distance. One hundred and fifty meters. One shot. Tough thing to accomplish,” he said simply. I looked over to Straight Lance, who was a light blue unicorn with a silvery mane. He had that overly confident smirk on his face that braggarts usually had.

“Does he know what I’m using? Moreover, do they know?” I asked.

“I told them you were using a gun, and they just laughed. I mean, I nearly did when you told me as well … they’re hardly a match for a spell,” he said dismissively. That time I could tell he wasn’t acting.

“Sure, whatever. If we both hit, how do we tell who won?” I asked.

“Based on killshots. Our Lord General here has volunteered to officiate. Once one of you have fired from the position, Lord General Armor will teleport down there and check the results,” he said as he gestured to Shining Armor who was sitting beside his wife. Apparently they did this often since there was a set of bleachers.

“Alright. Let him fire first,” I said before leaning over the divider. Lance was two dividers away, preparing with whatever a unicorn would do before firing a spell. I don’t know, I’m not a pony so I have no clue. “Oh, and what’re the odds?”

“Against you, that’s all you need to know. Lance is one of the best shots in the Solar Guard right now,” Wind Shear said before trotting over to Lance.

“Sure he is,” I mumbled.

“Ready?” I heard Wind Shear say to Lance, who replied with an affirmative. I didn’t even bother to watch what was going to happen. It would only serve as a distraction.

I heard a faint crackling before a loud zap. A few seconds passed after the sound before I heard a rather loud pop, most likely Shining going to check. It sounded much like when Twilight teleported earlier. A few moments later it was followed by another pop, and Shining was back.

“Direct hit! Barrel shot, tore through the upper chest cavity. Dead within moments,” Shining said a little too cheerfully. Good shot apparently.

The crowd cheered and jeered me at the reaction, while Lance gave a rather victorious smirk. I didn’t reply with anything, instead picking up my rifle and moving to the stall he had been in. On the move over, I looked to see Horizon and Candlelight beaming at me.

“Get set up,” Wind Shear said as I made my way into that stall. I simply placed the rifle on the ground, went prone and was ready within moments.

“Good to go,” I said, one hand on the grip and the other on my stock, my breathing already slowed.

“Clear the target!” I heard him yell. I looked down the scope to the target that had a black mark in the area that Shining had described. In the amount of time it took to blink, a new target was in there, the other one having completely vanished.

Magic, am I right?

“Ready?” I heard Wind Shear say from behind me.

“Ready,” I replied steadily. I didn’t expect a second confirmation. Instead, I simply placed the crosshairs on the target’s head.

Breathe in, breathe out. Nice and calm, muscles relaxed. Small tension on the trigger. Faint pop.

All they saw was the dirt kick up behind them. Well that’s all I expected them to see. The silence behind me was deafening. It’s an expression.

Shining did his teleport thing, while I got out of my crouch, grabbing the lone shell casing on the ground. The teleport was louder than my shot, thank god. The reverse would have been true if my suppressor wasn’t attached. Shortly after, Shining reappeared back with the group.

“Direct hit … headshot. Dead instantly … Ryan wins,” he said with a little bit of disappointment. The crowd was stunned, but Wind Shear still went around and collected the bits that were being forked out. I packed up my weapon while watching him walk through the group. He brought the bits back to a table that I didn’t notice was sitting in front of the bleachers. He proceeded to count them out.

“House takes its cut. Sigil takes forty bits. Gilda takes a hundred and sixty bits. Star Luck takes twenty bits. Finally, Princess Cadance takes forty bits,” he counted out before hoofing over the bits to the respective parties. More than a few ponies gawked at Princess Cadance. I was interested as well, especially over the fact that she’d bet on me. Though I wasn’t interested enough to say. I didn’t expect Wind Shear to garner that much interest in the bet that in one take we were well into the black.

That means a positive monetary gain, by the way.

“Gentlemen,” I said before Gilda and I walked away. I was good for the day, and I didn’t need to be around possibly angry ponies.

Once Gilda and I were out of the training grounds, she broke the silence. “You could make a lot of bits doing this.”

“It’s a waste of ammo,” I simply replied.

“Well, make more! Seriously, we could be rich if we did this often enough,” Gilda said, apparently feeling the weight that the added bits had given her coin purse.

“Unless you have refined gunpowder, bullet primers that fit a seven six two by fifty one round, and access to a blacksmith or something that can make me copper bullets that fit the casing perfectly, we’re not going to be doing this again,” I deadpanned.

She didn’t respond at first, instead coming to the realisation that there was more to my weapon than she thought. That caused a sheepish look to appear on her face.

“Don’t worry about it, Gilda,” I said, cutting her off from having to say something. Whether or not she was going to say something was irrelevant, but I figured I might as well stop her from apologizing if she was going to. “I think it’s about supper time. Let’s see if we can get an early supper of something.”

We walked for a little bit longer, passing the gardens and back into the door we had originally come out of. Once again it was in relative silence but … once again, Gilda broke it.

“So, you’re leaving tomorrow?” she asked me, a little hesitant.

“Yeah. I don’t like staying in one place for too long. Feels weird, you know?” I replied. She didn’t answer right away, instead taking time to think about it. Well, at least that’s what she looked like she was doing. Couldn’t really tell.

“Can I come with you?” she asked, shocking me completely. I was a little blindsided by the statement. I hadn’t expected her to want to come with after she had become friends with Dash again. Hell, it was only a day after they had made up!

“Why would you want to follow me? You have Dash now,” I said, more than a little shock slipping into my voice. “You’d follow an old man you barely know instead of your best friend?”

“Shut up, dweeb,” she mumbled, not even remotely answering my question. It took her a second to find the words, but she eventually continued. “I just feel like it’s something I should do. Despite everything, I just feel I should follow you … and keep you from getting in trouble.”

I laughed at that last line. “Keep me from trouble … ha! You have a better chance at finding alien life!“

Yes I know, ironically bad example … but you get what I mean. Hell, even you all understand that my life is just full of stuff that happens no matter what. I’ve been getting into trouble the moment that society broke down. So it made little sense that she could keep me from such a situation.

“Yes, I know, Gilda … bad example. Think about what you’re saying though. You have a lot in front of you, and you want to waste it by following an aging human around your world?”

She gave it some thought, never breaking stride. I thought she was going to answer an immediate ‘yes’ much like many people who fully believe in what they were saying. It gave me hope that Gilda would see reason and instead stay where she had a chance at building a decent life, instead of being on the move for who knew how long.

“Yes,” she said. “Despite how much of a dick you are … you need me. You wouldn’t survive for long without me.”

That earned a laugh from both of us, but once she was finished laughing she gave me a hard stare to drive home the fact that she wasn’t kidding. I didn’t understand why she wanted to do it, but I wasn’t going to stop her. This was not my choice, no matter how much I wanted it to be.

“Fine, but you have to clear things up with Dash before we leave. As in, put everything out in the open. Capiche?” I asked. She looked confused at the last word. “It means okay.”

“Fine, I will,” she said finally. That at least put my mind to ease on one thing.

I know I haven’t really addressed it, but even though I had only been around her for a while, she reminded me too much of someone that was close to me a long time ago. Much like her weird feeling to follow me on my trip, I felt a strange feeling to make sure I could protect her when I could. Maybe it was some fatherly thing that develops when you get older, and I was old enough, but I felt as though I was more of a guardian for her than just a random stranger in her life. It was probably the first time I had ever felt something like that.

Sure, there were times I realised I had to protect someone to the fullest extent I could, but never had I felt a connection like I did with Gilda. Looking back, I blame magic … what else could it have been? Nothing should develop that fast.

Nothing.

Nothing …

Oh … sorry. Got lost in thought there for a second. Hmm, let’s see; oh yes, I remember where I was now.

It didn’t take us long to make it to the dining room, though when we arrived, we found out that we were the first ones there. The room was surprisingly daunting when it was empty, but that was probably because of the fucking gold table. It’s mind shattering to think that something so precious back home was rather common on Equestria. I mean, it had to be in order to have bits made of gold and not have it be much of a big deal. I could only imagine what else would have been common for them.

Unfortunately, with us being so early, there was no waiter that would come and take our meals. It was unlucky, really, since that meant we had to wait an undetermined amount of time to order any food whatsoever. So we just opted to sit down and wait. Let’s just say that it felt like a long time to wait.

Long enough that I eventually found myself stretching out on the table itself. I had to admit that I felt lighter without all of my jackets and stuff bearing down on my body. I made a mental note to remember to do that more often, though only when I could … which has been never since returning. Just not enough times where I’m truly safe from harm. Sure, I had my weapons still on me, but my jacket carried many other useful items for potential unexpected situations.

“You ever get the feeling that someone, somewhere is pissed off at you?” I ask out loud, doing nothing more than staring at the ceiling.

“Does it count if you know someone is pissed at you?” Gilda replied, countering my point.

“Touche,” I say before the main door swung open with a small creak. They really needed to oil that door … it had hardly been noticeable earlier, but it was getting progressively worse as the day wore on.

I didn’t move from my spot or even look over at the door; I was in the middle of counting the stylized moons and suns on the ceiling. Let me tell you, there was an absolute fuck tonne. I think I was around a couple hundred or something when we were interrupted.

“What are you doing?” Trixie asked from somewhere off to my right. I didn’t bother checking where exactly.

“Waiting for the staff to realise that we’ve been out here for like ten minutes. That, or for something to happen … either one works,” I say, before resuming my counting. It had taken a lot of concentration to keep my eyes on the exact spot, and to remember my number, but I pulled it off.

“And here Trixie thought she was late,” the mare murmured to herself before pulling up a chair somewhere close to where I was laying across the table horizontally. After she got into her chair, nothing happened - just more silence as I continued to tick away the suns and moons on the ceiling. Eventually, Trixie decided to break the silence, thank god. “Where do you plan on travelling, if Trixie might ask?”

“Don’t rightfully know. I mean, I know nothing of this world, so I have no clue as to where there is to travel to. All I know is names, not places. Though I’ve always wanted to see minotaurs, so perhaps I’ll travel there. I’ve heard that … what’s the name again?”

“Tayros,” Trixie answered.

“I’ve always heard Tayros was a nice place to visit in the summer,” I said nonchalantly not really caring just how wrong that statement was.

“It isn’t summer, dweeb. Still spring, and you’ve never been to Tayros,” Gilda said, probably rolling her eyes.

“Right over your head,” I muttered before deciding that I was bored with counting those suns and moons. So I sat up, letting my legs hang off the edge of the table. I saw that Trixie had taken a seat right beside Gilda, though she still left a spot for Luna, if she decided to dine with us. “I swear that if something doesn’t happen shortly, I’m going to find the kitchen and whip something up myself.”

If you ever want something to happen, just remember to say out loud ‘nothing’s happening’ or something like that. Murphy’s law will kick in and something will happen. It’s almost completely guaranteed.

Before long, the rest of the party - including Celestia, Luna, Shining Armor, and Cadance - made their way into the dining room via the squeaky door. . Apparently Shining and Cadance were extremely close with Twilight because they were so engrossed in their conversation that they didn’t notice the human sitting on the table. Though the rest of the party did, mostly just looking at me with curious glances, Luna and Celestia giving me their best poker faces … they were fucking amazing at them by the way. Couldn’t read a single thing from them.

“Ooh! Are we having a table party?” Pinkie asked before hopping up onto the table, bouncing the entire time, yet somehow not making the table shake or anything.. “If we are, I can grab the party favours! I know I stashed some around here, somewhere …”

“No, Pinkie, we aren’t having a ‘table’ party, dear. Now please get off the table so we can eat,” Rarity said, obviously killing Pinkie’s fun. Though she was right, as long as I was sitting up on the table and getting odd glances, we’d never get food. So, with minor reluctance, I slid off the table as well.

The waiters came, took orders and went. I wanted a steak but they apparently weren’t serving that, which was unfortunate. Thankfully, they could make shrimp, which was a bonus since it had been forever since I had shrimp. So I had shrimp linguine alfredo, with a fine scotch to drink. Sure I had already downed more than enough alcohol for the day, but I felt that if they were going to offer it, I might as well take up the offer.

There was idle conversation for awhile, but that all eventually died as standard silence took up the room, much like it does whenever people run out of things to talk about. If you look long enough, you can see that everyone has something they want to say but are being polite in that they won’t talk about themselves unless asked.

“So, how do you three know each other?” I asked while gesturing at Twilight, Cadance, and Shining. “I assume it’s just a Royal thing?”

“Us?” Cadance replied before giggling. “Oh Faust, no. I used to be Twilight’s foalsitter when she was just barely old enough to walk by herself! That, and Shiny here is her BBBFF.”

I merely lowered my glasses to let them see that I was wondering what the fuck she was talking about. I mean if you heard that, would you understand without any context? Exactly.

“He’s my Big Brother Best Friend Forever!” Twilight said with some odd chipperness. Well at least it was odd to me. I simply gave an ‘ah’ in response to that before dropping the topic. It was done with for all I cared, since I got my requested information. He was her older brother, she used to be babysat by Cadance, and the nepotism ran heavily in Equestria’s rulers. All I needed to know.

When the food finally came, I was starving … well, close to starving. I hadn’t even dipped into my jerky reserves today, so I was feeling empty with only having three distinct meals. Sure, it sounds hardy, but when you get used to eating every hour or so, you start to get hungry at certain times as though your stomach was an alarm clock. Every hour without eating a little bit left me increasingly hungry.

Let me tell you, if you ever get a chance to have a decent cook make shrimp linguine Alfredo for you, do. I used to hate the taste of the creamy sauce over noodles but when you mix in the shrimp, you either forget about the sauce or come to appreciate the flavour. That and shrimp is awesome.

As I was eating my meal, I happened to catch a few looks from the rest of the ponies, specifically looks that lasted a little too long to not be nothing. They were curious about something. I figured why not ask.

“Any reason you all keep giving me glances?” I asked to the table in general.

None of them wanted to speak up at first, instead opting to look at each other or trying to focus too intensely at their food. The only one still looking at me was Luna, who had that poker face on still. It made me wonder what was going through her mind, but I was brought back to what I asked when Gilda leaned up and whispered to me.

“Lack of hair, dude,” she said. “Ponies rarely see it that bad.”

I looked at her for a second before looking over at the table in amusement. “Really? Is it the baldness? Why? I’m pretty sure you’ve already seen my head ...”

“Sorry, darling, but it’s just a little confusing. You have so much … hair on your face yet none on your head,” Rarity spoke up. At least she was willing to say something. I gave her points for that.

“Hereditary baldness, and a hereditary predisposition to facial hair. Shaved my head years ago, and kept it that way. Makes the beard stand out more,” I said while stroking my beard a little. I had never had a problem with the look, in fact I always saw it as awesome. It gave me a fear factor when in groups.

The group gave a somewhat collective ‘oh’ then returned to their food, though unsurprisingly Twilight was staring at me in fascination. I shuddered a little since I remembered that our Q and A session was cut short on my account and deep down inside, she was probably looking for more answers. That could wait or perhaps be skipped if I played it right.

So dinner went on, we finished our food, and I declined dessert much as I always do. I’ve been offered dessert often in the past, and I’ve always declined. It was a personal thing. I went through a rough time when I was younger where I would decline any possible luxuries that were offered because I felt that I didn’t deserve them …

I grew out of that phase, coming to terms that if anything, I should accept them because life is too short. The only thing that I kept up after that time was the dessert thing. Over time, I had gotten so used to never having it that it became second habit to just decline the offer … that, and I feared that if I tasted anymore fancy food from Equestria that I would never want to return home.

Of course I’m kidding about that last part. Once my mind is made up, I rarely change it, especially when it comes to trivial matters like that.

The group went back to its chattering ways when dessert was done, each pony talking about their day again or the meal itself. Everyone was talking to someone … except Celestia, Luna, and I. What their reasons were for their silence I had no clue about, but I refrained from talking just out of habit. I always preferred to listen until someone brought me into a conversation.

The talking died down enough at one point for Celestia to do just that. “So, Twilight tells me you are planning to leave Equestria.”

“Yeah,” I replied before swishing my scotch. I always drink that stuff slowly. “Figured that if it will be a month or more till I can return home, why stay in one place? I’ve got a whole world in front of me to explore.”

“Oh, where do you plan to go?” Cadance asked, jutting in.

“Tayros. At least to start. Always wanted to see a minotaur,” I said before taking a sip. “I’ve never been one to stay in a place too long.”

“Always on the run?” Celestia asked, a leading question if I’ve ever heard one … which I had heard all too often.

“Such questions are unbecoming of conversation out of a courtroom,” I said with a deadpan tone. Most of the group looked confused at the statement. I decided to somewhat answer her question in the end, though. “I enjoy new sights. Something learned from my world. Couldn’t travel without money before …”

I settled my eyes back on Celestia, who was giving me a rather icy stare for that statement. Not my fault; she was the one trying to imply something by putting words in my mouth. If she didn’t want that type of response, she should have asked better questions.

“I’ll be going with him,” Gilda chirped in during the silence. I don’t know why she decided to speak up, but perhaps it was to break the building tension. It was a horrible attempt. A horrible, horrible attempt.

Probably the worse attempt in history.

Maybe in all of time.

I think that’s a safe bet.

“What!?” Dash yelled from her spot across the table before leaping up into the air, her face a mixture of pure rage and shock. She came zooming over to our side; if I didn’t force my hand to stay down, I would have reacted somehow. I don’t remember the exact direction my hand was moving but it was either to my pistol or to cold clock her in the head.

“Yeah, I’ve decided to go with him,” Gilda said in response.

“But why?! I just got you back and you’re leaving! How come you chose him over me? Did he brainwash you or something?!”

“Woah now, Dash. Calm down,” I said trying to be peaceful in this situation.

“How could you do this to me!?” she yelled at me, spittle hitting my face. “Do you understand how much she means to me?!”

“Yes I-” I didn’t get to finish before something unexpected happened.

“Shut up!” she yelled before letting a hoof fly, catching me in the left cheek with a sharp right hook.

She had surprising power behind that small frame because it knocked me and my chair onto the ground. Hell, I was seeing fucking stars and my jaw felt out of place. Not the first time for either but I was in daze from the unexpected attack. Hell, my hearing had disappeared or something because, all I heard from behind me was muffled sounds. Nothing recognisable but by the loudness of said muffled sounds, something was happening.

While down on my knees, I managed to orient myself enough to at least push my jaw back into place. It gave a sharp click and I hissed in pain as a response. Like I said, it wasn’t the first time, but that didn’t mean it didn’t hurt to have it knocked out of place. Oh, and yes there is a little bit of difference between fully dislocating it and what happened. Imagine a ball and socket. Dislocating would have it completely out of the socket … this was more like it wasn’t sitting in the bottom, instead up one of the sides.

So yeah, still painful but I had to give it to her. She had actually caught me unaware, which wasn’t something I was used to anymore.

I poked a finger into my ear to try and pop it and get my hearing back, but it wasn’t of any use. So I figured I might as well just get back into my seat, or at least stand up and let them know I was fine, since not a soul had surrounded me since I went down, just more muffled sounds. I shook my head and blinked a few times before utilizing the table as leverage.

When I got off my knees, my hearing suddenly returned, allowing me to hear the full shouting match that was going on. I’m not going to describe it since it was still a little confusing, but essentially almost all parties at the table were yelling at something or another. Mainly it was an argument between Gilda and Dash, but I could see Cadance and Shining trying to intervene, while Rarity held Fluttershy, who was shaking … and Pinkie as well who was shocked and shaking slightly as well. Applejack and Twilight were apparently going at it as well, but I think what took me for some surprise was the fact that Luna and Celestia were just sitting there watching.

I made eye contact with Celestia, who kept that poker face, and though I wanted to be angry at her, I realised that she wasn’t to blame. Hell, not even Rainbow was to blame.

Yeah, yeah, I know. ‘But she clocked you one’ you say in shock. Yeah, well she had a fucking bomb dropped on her by Gilda, so I wasn’t too surprised. Though that didn’t mean I didn’t have some anger to release … fucking adrenaline or whatever.

I made my move to get this whole situation under control. Ryan style.

“Everyone of you retarded fuckwits, shut the fuck up and sit your asses back down or I will ensure you never walk again,” I roared at the top of my lungs. It took me back to the two years spent coaching high school baseball. They only listened to yelling that was louder than them. All the ponies, minus the two diarchs, and the sole griffon suddenly became very quiet. Hell, even Shining was looking at me with quiet patience. If my head wasn’t still spinning a little I would have smiled, but it still was. “Good, you fucking done with your yelling matches?”

A few nods came in reply.

“Great, just fucking great. I think it’s my turn to tell you all to just listen,” I said at a much more reasonable volume. “Going to make this plain and simple. I’m not pissed at you, Dash, though I have every right to be. But in the future, calm your fucking nerves and learn some control. Gilda, you’ve got to talk your peace to whoever needs to hear it. The rest of you, I have no clue why you were arguing, but how successful was it? Whatever. Oh! Finally, you two diarchs … yeah, great moderating or whatever sitting in your chairs was. Now excuse me, I’m going to find that hospital again … think I blacked out there for a moment.”

With that, I made my way a little shakily out of the dining room, thankfully to find a pair of guards outside the room. Why they hadn’t moved at the commotion was beyond me, but it wasn’t my place to berate them on that. Instead I did ask if one of them could take me to the hospital. One of them agreed a little hesitantly, but either way I was on my way to the hospital.

Every couple of steps my vision swam a little before returning to focus. Dash really had hit me hard, and I wouldn’t have been surprised if I had a concussion.

Spoiler alert, I had a minor one.

The nurse from earlier wasn’t working, but either way I was examined and told that at least by pony symptoms I had a concussion. I asked what pony symptoms were, and she essentially listed off the same things humans look for but with a few added ones.

So yeah, I had to take it rather easy for the next little bit, and also not sleep or be woken up often that night. For good measure, she said. Ehh, I’ve gone longer without sleep so what was one night.

Eventually she dismissed me, after she made sure I completely understood what she was talking about; understandable really ... though she didn’t have to go over it a second time. Of course, because she decided to do that, I purposely repeated her statements with the exact opposite of what she was trying to tell me. She gave me a smirk before shooing me off. I didn’t even get my head wrapped! I wanted to be Bald Snake, the fourth ‘son’ of Big Boss. Ha.

...

Awesome! At least someone knows Metal Gear. If you stick around for the entire thing, you’ll hear a few more lines that will make you laugh!

I was lucky that the guard was waiting for me because if he had left I would have been lost. I still wasn’t up to snuff really, and if I couldn’t easily navigate the corridors while normal, what hope did I have when I was concussed?

Though I had a thought as he was walking me back to my room. If I wasn’t going to sleep tonight, I might as well get a decent view of the city and night sky later on.

“Is there somewhere high enough to would allow me to look over the city?” I asked to the guard. Nameless guard number eight or so … not actually, but it’s funny to think of them as such. Anyways, number eight replied that he could take me to the observatory.

“Well, what are we waiting for? High Ho Silver!” I yelled before lightly jogging forward. Now it would have been a good move if we hadn’t been at a T intersection and our turn was supposed to be right. So I had to jog back and actually follow the guard. I regretted nothing just because of the confusion the guard showed for a split second.

Long story short, the guard deposited me in front of the observatory before heading off back to his duty. I was greeted by an unwanted, yet familiar sight. In front of the doors were three bat ponies. Two were completely unfamiliar, but the third was the one bat pony that you don’t want to really run into.

“Hey! if it isn’t my favourite human!” Candlelight said as she trotted over to me. See, the guard had actually just left me at the top of the stairs, not bothering to actually get me inside. It wouldn’t have helped anyways.

“Only human,” I corrected before giving her a rather warm smile in return. Despite what I just said, she was actually one of the coolest ponies I had met.

“Semantics! What brings you up here? If you came to visit little old me, I’m sorry to say but I don’t swing that way,” she said, never losing that grin.

“Yes, I came up all this way just to get into your metaphorical pants. I guess I’m just all out of luck. The only pony that I wanted to bone and she turns out to be all about pussy,” I said with a lighthearted deadpan tone.

“Really? You wouldn’t even buck Princess Cadance? Or Princess Luna?” she asked, either buying that statement or going along with it. “Hmm, well I guess it would be a big buck you to all the stallions … and I could claim I bucked an alien! Let’s do it!”

“Wait wha-” I managed to get out before she turned around and trotted forward a little before pausing. She looked back over her shoulder, eyelids halfway before she flagged her tail.

Flagged means raised, morons.

Yep, my only reaction was to facepalm just enough to cover my eyes. I think I also groaned a little, but that only because I smacked myself in the face. I was still sore on that side and everything.

Of course the response to that was obvious. Candlelight burst out laughing like there was no tomorrow. I even peaked between my fingers to see her actually rolling on the floor. It was a true R-O-F-L. Otherwise known as ‘roll on the floor laughing.’ I simply shook my head and sighed in response, then proceeded to make my way past the laughing Candlestick and into the observatory.

I wasn’t feeling good enough to fully deal with that shit. Hell, even if I was healthy enough, I don’t think I would have wanted to deal with that. I merely wanted to sit somewhere nice and stare at something that wasn’t small enough to give me a headache … so no reading, unfortunately. Thankfully the answer to my wants was presented to me the moment I entered the observatory.

It was a three-level room that had shelves lining the sides of both levels. On the far side of the room was a massive glass window that allowed one to see out over Canterlot and the like. The design of the place was cool in that half of the first level was in an open area. It’s tough to explain, but think of it like this. The second level only covered half of the first, with stairs being directly ahead of me. There was a small second level ring that ran the outer rim of the room, but other than that at least half of the first floor wasn’t covered.

Finally, I could see the third floor doing the same thing to the second floor, but it only held a large telescope instead. It truly was a beautiful design for a room. And I probably butchered it for all of you … sorry.

I decided to check out the second floor, because I could easily see the first and the third look liked it was just made for the telescope. Which, might I remind you, was one fucking big telescope.

As I approached the stairs, the sounds of hooves coming up from behind in a slow trot reminded me that there was a pony that was probably going to laugh at me for the little stunt.

“So what brings you up here anyway? Not that I mind really, since you’ve made my shift awesome already,” Candlelight asked as she followed me up the stairs. I waited till the top to answer her.

“Not allowed to sleep tonight so I needed some place to relax and that’s away from others,” I said as I looked around to see what there was to do. Thankfully, I noticed that there was a couple of cushy-looking chairs in front of the big window. The view alone was probably worth putting the chairs there. Every once in awhile you find a chair that looks like it has a set purpose in life. Some are simple office chairs, others are tricked out gaming chairs. You had bean bag chairs for chilaxing and you had sofas just to lay across and do nothing. These chairs - these tall red, intricately carved chairs - were reading chairs. There was no other purpose in their meaningless existence as far as I was concerned.

“Really? How come?” Candlelight asked, a little bit of concern actually making its way into her voice. It was weird hearing that gruff voice show some concern.

“Got sucker punched by the walking talking rainbow after some stupid conversation pieces in the dining room. Got a minor concussion, no big deal really, but I figured instead of laying around in my boring room, might as well catch a view and attempt to read a book if the small print don’t make my eyes hurt,” I said as I walked to one of the chairs, tracing the curves of the thing before sitting down and letting off a deep sigh. It was amazing to sit on. “How come you’re still up? Didn’t you sleep at all?”

“I do not know what this ‘sleep’ is. I’m in the Lunar Guard for Luna’s sake,” Candlelight said with a smirk as she hopped up onto the chair to my right. Apparently she was of importance enough to spend time talking with me instead of doing her job.

“That’s right. Besides, you run on alcohol and the juices from mare’s pussies,” I said sarcastically before chuckling. It was an amusing thought and I wouldn’t have been surprised if I was correct.

“More powerful than Princess Twilight’s coffee!” she bellowed before laughing as well. After a few moments though, her face became hard as she looked at me with wide eyes. “Seriously, never drink her coffee. It dissolves walls. Full walls!”

“Don’t worry about me; I don’t drink coffee anyways,” I replied while shaking my head at her overly dramatic statement. Don’t confuse me shaking my head with me thinking it wasn’t funny. I love over the top statements, especially when someone sells it perfectly. “Don’t you have a job to do or something?”

“Nah, most of my job is keeping the recruits in shape and assigning jobs for the night. After that I’m more or less on call,” she replied.

“Really? That sounds like the best job ever. You are fucking lucky,” I said with some shock. I wasn’t kidding, ever. That sounded amazingly simple and rather fun.

“You’re bucking right it’s the best bucking job ever! Though it took years to get to this position, so don’t you dare try and steal it from me,” she said before pointing a hoof at me as though I was going to do something traitorous.

“Ha, you don’t have to worry about that,” I replied with a small laugh. “I’m leaving tomorrow, then heading off to Tayros the day after. The urge to explore never dies for me.”

“Really? You’re leaving that quickly? Damn … and here I was just starting to like you,” she said with a small frown.

“What, just starting to like me? Here I thought I was your favourite human?” I said in jest.

“Well yeah, but I was talking on pony scales. Entirely different,” she replied before blowing me a raspberry. Then she got quiet for a little bit, just staring out the window. I decided to do the same, just in time to watch the sun finally fall beneath the horizon.

Only for the moon to slowly appear in sight from top of the window. I stared up at it all the while hearing small murmurs from Candlelight. I looked over to see her head bowed, eyes closed, and her lips moving slightly. Whatever she was saying it looked like a prayer in my eyes. I was curious as to what it was, but I knew that it wasn’t in proper form to ask her directly. Instead I just switched my gaze to the city that seemed to stay alive despite it being night time … though I constantly flicked my eyes back over to Candlelight.

“Do you ever pray?” she asked me out of nowhere. I always hate religious lines of conversation. So just for a warning if you really need it, but nothing I say should be taken to heart. Just my personal views on stuff, they are not fact.

“No. Never really saw a reason to. We never had physical deities,” I replied to her. Okay, as far as I know, that one line is fact. Otherwise, just take it with a grain of salt. I don’t know if you all are religious or not, and truly I don’t care enough to ask. To each his own as long as his own doesn’t require other’s own to be pushed out for his own. Got it?

“Our history is broken and lost for the most part,” Candlelight said. “All that we really know is that bat ponies-Thestrals if you want to go by our mother tongue-appeared during the Discord era. Princess Luna saved us and integrated us into Equestria … with that she became more than just our ruler. She became our goddess.”

“Only we remembered when she was banished, and never gave up hope for her. She saved our race and gave us hope … how can we not keep hope for us? So when she returned … it was the biggest celebration for us. All the other races and pony tribes saw it a simple thing, one to be celebrated, but that was it. For us, it was the greatest gift since our addition to Equestria. Hay, it even made me a believer. After everything, how could I not be?”

I had no response to her rhetorical question, but one word jumped out. Banished. What had happened that got her banished? I wanted to ask so many questions, but I knew that this was not the time or place. Hell, despite my inner desire to start arguments for the sake of learning and speaking, I felt that that topic would be a sore one. If I was going to bring it up, it would be with Luna herself, not someone who idolized her or whatever it’s called.

I don’t think she wanted me to respond anyway; instead she merely switched the topic from her ‘religion’ to mine. Or lack thereof. “You don’t pray because you’ve never seen your deity?”

“It’s more complicated than that for me, Candlelight. Though humans have never seen their god or gods with their own eyes for all I know, I don’t pray or anything because after everything I have ever seen … I always ask myself, if there was a god or goddess, then why would they let all these horrible things happen? It’s a weak argument if you assume our god or gods have more creations than just the ones on our planet, but if it doesn’t … then I just wonder.”

“About?” she offered.

“About what that means when compared against human history. Human kindness … human cruelty. Against what became of our world … what became of ourselves. I’ve seen things that would break others, Candlelight. The greatest cruelty that people could think of … yet it wasn’t just a bad dream or anything. No I was there, watching … waiting for something to end it. For someone or something to come and just tell me, to tell them it was all just a dream. Yet, no one came down from the heavens to stop it, no magical, all powerful being … no saviour. The only one that came to put an end to the suffering was me, Candlelight. I had to endure my own inner pain at the tragedy to make sure that they didn’t have to suffer any more. So why should this old man believe in something that does nothing? Why should I put faith in something that lets us perform such horrors against each other?”

I became quiet after that. I was feeling a rolling wave of emotions that stemmed from just thinking about all that. It made me recall some of those horrors I experienced and it made me furious that people still could believe in a ‘god’ when such things were happening. Though as I said … I’m just an old man. Who am I to say if there is or isn’t something?

…

Don’t dwell on those words. I’ll move on.

Candlelight was looking at me with sympathy or something like that in her eyes. She hardly blinked as she stared at me. I was about to question why she was looking at me like that, but I felt it first. There was a tear falling from my right eye.

With a gloved hand I wiped it away, removing the offending liquid from my face. I wanted to pass it off as nothing, to chuckle and just go back to the lighthearted conversation, but I couldn’t. I took this to a bad place … I created the path we metaphorically walked. The only way to end it was to stop making the path.

“Can I be alone, Candlelight? I’ve … I’ve got things to think about,” I choked out, the same sound someone makes when they are holding back tears … much like the ones I fought to let fall.

She didn’t say a word at first, instead nodding in response and getting off her chair. Instead of leaving, however, she trotted over to me and placed a hoof on my knee. No words were spoken, just a gesture meant to tell me that she was there if need be.

“I’ll make sure to … to say goodbye before I leave,” I said with a sad smile, which just earned a reciprocal one in return. With that she left me to my own little inner ball of misery.

I had to fucking dig up those thoughts, I just had to pull out those buried thoughts at that moment, to kill that little bit of time spent with Candlelight. I wanted to just yell at myself and berate myself for pulling something like that. Instead, I remained quiet, just staring out at the night sky and watching the faint twinkling of the stars while I tried to calm down and tell myself that it was going to be alright.

Yet I realised that it wasn’t going to be alright. Nothing as morbid as what you might think but more along the lines of me relapsing back into a frightful stage in my life. I had dug up a repressed emotion that I never should have buried. I thought I cleansed my thoughts years ago - reminded myself that I couldn’t keep going on if I kept holding onto the past with that death grip. Yet there I was, near crying because I found a skeleton buried so deep in my closet that it might as well have not existed till that moment.

…

Do you want to know? I don’t want to deviate from the story too much, but do you want to know?

Fine.

It was a couple years after The Reckoning, I was just getting accustomed to life really, though barely scraping by with what I could find. I hadn’t made a name for myself like I have now so I was just a nobody, scavenging where I could, hunting down ways to keep me fed and alive. Yet I didn’t drop myself to the degrading practices that I saw some perform. Nothing really sickening, but they acted more like savages, and I had decided to only see them from afar, never getting close to them

One day, I was making a trek through what used to be North Dakota. The place wasn’t changed too much, still lush with trees but the landscape was completely different than what my maps said.

I was hunting a deer when I heard a gunshot ring off somewhere far away, but the distance wasn’t anything of note. However, I heard many more follow it, which indicated one thing - automatic fire. I was young and naive at that time and more curious about what was happening. I should have gotten out of there and ran. I should have left that moment but no, I had to find out what was happening.

I slowly and cautiously made my way in the direction of the shots. It wasn’t tough to do since there more shots rang out every once in awhile. Eventually, I found myself at a rocky outcropping.

I slipped through a few cracks, allowing me to peer into the open area just beyond it. What I saw off the bat wasn’t easy to look at, but when I peered through my scope I found an even worse sight.

There was what looked like a settled area that had the charred wreckage of cars and trailers scattered around among the scorched ground, and a few fires burning rather large. It looked like a mess, as though someone had dropped a bomb or something on the area. When I peered through my scope, I finally saw the extent of how bad things were.

There was a pack of maybe six men and two women, either reclining in chairs or watching around, the garb suggesting they were more of the savage type. In front of them was a little kid, nearly butt naked, cowering in fear while one of the men pointed a pistol at the feet of the boy before firing, causing the kid to jump. The boy cried all the while, begging for something that I couldn’t hear because of the distance, which was about two hundred meters. The men and women just laughed at him. That was disgusting enough as it was but I panned to the right a little and found cages, most of them empty but tinted with what looked to be red colouring or blackened marks. In one cage was another young kid. This one was crying just as much, curled into the fetal position. He barely looked older than maybe three from that distance, while the one being shot at had to be six or so.

I was horrified as it was, but I just happened to look up a little and saw the worst sight of them all. Those fires I had seen were bonfires … ones built to burn people alive at the stake. Three of the fires had a blackened human-looking figure in the middle, slumped over, the life having been burned out of them. Yet there was a fourth bonfire … one not lit just yet. A woman stood on it, her eyes wide as they could be, her mouth opening and closing quickly, trying to speak or reason.

She didn’t get far with it. One of the females took what was possibly a lighter and lit the bottom of the pyre. The fire ignited, causing the woman to shriek loud enough for me to hear.

Cheers arose from the group, some of them holding something in their hands. When I focused on what they held, I saw it … burned meat.

My vision seemed to swim with a red tinting, my finger instantly flicking the safety of my Ruger Scout. That was my weapon back then, my own personally-bought weapon from before The Reckoning.

I lined up the woman that had lit the fire. Pulled the trigger. Her chest exploded out onto the fire.

Bolt action was the reload method on the Ruger, so I had to work quickly. Once reloaded, I aimed at another, who was confused at what was happening. I fired again, making a hole in his stomach as small as his finger, but his lower back showed his kidneys when he spinned around before falling to the ground.

Reloaded and ready to aim, I saw another one of them that was still confused. Took the shot, putting a hole in his neck, blood spurting out like a geyser as his head almost fell completely off his neck. I hoped he wasn’t dead instantly.

The man pointing his pistol at the kid ran and grabbed the kid, but I didn’t care at the second, instead reloading and taking out a fourth that was trying to hide behind a car. Idiot was facing the wrong way. The bullet tore through the side of his chest, putting him on the ground instantly.

I watched as the other female and two men ran away, hopefully screaming like banshees. yet the man who had shot at the kid still stood, having figured out my direction. He had no clue where I was, but that didn’t matter to him as he held his pistol up to the struggling kid’s head.

Under my breath I kept begging the kid to bite him or something and cause him to let go. I waited for a few seconds, watching the kid bawl his eyes out as the man held him up off the ground with arm, the gun resting against the kid’s temple. A few seconds too long. The fucker pulled the trigger, causing me to do the same. He had just been fast enough to kill the kid … but not fast enough to save his own head.

One for one is not a good thing! I was not fucking fast enough!

I wasn’t fast enough ...

After that, things get hazy as I remember running as fast as I could to the camp, hoping to at least save the woman at the fire. She smelled … oh god the smell … I would have puked if I wasn’t so focused. I ran immediately over to the fire hoping that it wasn’t large enough to be out of my hands …

It was.

She screamed and yelled at first, her head thrashing this way and that as she writhed in pain. I looked around frantically, searching for water or something to drown out the fire. There was none that I could see, hell I even checked the only useable camper. Nothing.

I ran back to the woman, who had stopped thrashing and instead was slumping over slightly. I feared the worst at first, until her head rose slightly.

“Just save him,” she choked out, her eyes filled with sorrow and regret. At that moment as I stared into her eyes I felt everything that she felt, I knew … I immediately knew what they meant when they says the eyes are windows into the soul. She started to go limp, her last breath coming slowly. She managed one last line. “His name’s Joshua.”

I didn’t even have enough time to reply before she went slack against her bindings. She had died right in front of me because I had hesitated. So I stumbled backwards, falling to my knees all the while just staring up at the woman. Twenty-four year old me realising right then and there that no matter how hard I tried, I would never be able to save those who needed to be saved. I couldn’t save my parents or my family, and I couldn’t save that woman.

I nearly cried right there, my emotions finally catching up with me as my adrenaline slowly died down. Yet I didn’t … I couldn’t. My emotions got shattered before I could even vent … like a building had toppled on them, erasing them from existence. I just felt numb … it was worse than the first time I had to kill someone in self defence … at least then I could reason with what happened.

There … I couldn’t think of anything. I don’t even remember hearing anything … not the crackling of the fire or the light breeze that seemed to whistle in my ears.

Nothing.

Until crying pierced the veil.

After that, I blacked out kind of … I mean I did something, I don’t really remember. The next thing I recall is that I was standing in front of a gate to a small settlement, one called Freedom’s Call, the gate rising as I carried a sleeping child in my arms, blood on my face and covering my legs where mud didn’t.

I ended up finding a family that was more than willing to take the kid in, but the whole scene of me walking down the town’s main street caused the sides to be lined with people. I don’t remember anything about them or what they whispered, but I can still feel their looks.

I left the town after finding a family. I didn’t even stay a full day, maybe an hour at most just to make sure everything was going to be fine for the kid. For Joshua.

When I made my way back into the forests that surrounded the settlement, I did an unconscious equipment check. Back then, I had a Glock for a pistol. I don’t recall the type, but I do remember what I saw when I went over it and my ammo for it.

I had been at full stock of five fifteen round clips. I was down to three, and the front of the Glock was splattered in blood. I didn’t really think too much of it, my mind still feeling numb from everything.

Then I bent over and wretched.

…

There, happy to have heard what horrors I was talking about? No matter what I saw after that incident, I will never recall anything worse. Sure, you all might think some of the others are worse, but to have been there and seen what I had seen … nothing will ever been worse. I’ve had to mercy kill others and yet I still remember that event as a more gruesome one then anything else …

Right.

Back then, sitting on that chair in the observatory, I replayed the events through my mind, tears falling down my eyes as I sat motionless, staring out the window of the observatory. I felt bile rising in my throat, but I choked it down.

No longer able to contain the anguish, I rose from my seat, made my way to the one that Candlelight had sat in … then grabbed the bottom of it and chucked it against another chair, causing a loud bang to resound through the observatory as they splintered.

More memories began to surface in my mind and in front of me, the visions being almost too much. I was recalling all the time I had killed, had seen someone killed, saw the aftermath of raiders, saw the torture cages and pits of Berlin … and saw my parents. All of it appeared before my eyes.

I didn’t even see what was happening, just the visions. Visions that shouldn’t have been there, that I had rid myself of years ago. Yet there they were in front of me as clear as the day I had seen them.

I felt was someone beside me, holding me while I sat on the ground, my vision swimming before finally blurring back into reality, finally clearing of all the memories. I felt something wrapped around me, a blanket of sorts, but once my eyes finally saw where I was and everything around me I noticed that said blanket was blue in tinge … and made of feathers.

“Memories are often painful, even some of the best are too …” Luna said beside me. She felt larger than she actually was, but that was probably because I was curled up.

I didn’t respond to her statement, hell, I didn’t even look at her. Instead I just stared at the overturned chairs, a couple of them missing legs. There was a handful of books scattered around and the shattered remnants of a table. I struggled to come to terms with the fact that I had possibly done that. What had I done?a

As though she somehow knew what I was looking at, she responded to my unasked question. “My guards heard a ruckus in the room. One found me while the other tried to control you. When I arrived, I found one of my guards knocked out and you trying to pull your face off while yelling, ‘get it out.’”

I stayed quiet, listening to Luna speak of what had happened. I didn’t remember a single thing she said I did … just the memories. They were so real and vivid … unlike anything I’d ever had before, unlike even my dreams. I shivered at the thought of me assaulting someone out of nowhere.

“Calm yourself, it’s over,” Luna said softly as she held me close. I stopped shivering but I didn’t feel any safer from myself.

Eventually I managed to choke out a word. “Why?”

She didn’t respond, though I felt her shifting a little, probably looking at me, but I couldn’t meet her gaze. I felt horrible at the outburst … felt unworthy or something like it. But I did manage to get out more words.

“Why were they ... so vivid?” I asked.

“It isn’t something so cut and dry … I can only speculate it is because of you and the planet. That is all I know … nothing more,” she said, seemingly holding back something, but I didn’t want to know. Whatever had caused the memories to flood back so quickly was something that I didn’t even want to contemplate.

She ended up just holding me for what seemed like the entire night. I knew it wasn’t but the passing of time crawled by slowly. Eventually I found myself sitting in a chair once again, looking out over the now peaceful Canterlot and the lands beyond. She even got me tea before finding a seat and quietly sitting beside me.

“Are you mad at me?” I asked, much like a little kid would ask their parents. That’s what I felt like right there. I had been a master of myself for so long … so to lose control felt like I was merely a child once more. Nothing more than a child.

“Earlier, yes. Now … no. I too can act quickly about certain things … and can forget that others are not like my sister or I,” Luna said with a soft sigh. “If you worry about our friendship, then don’t. It was never in harm’s way.”

I gave a small and rather sad laugh to that statement. I had never thought that, even I knew that all relationships have arguments. If you can not have an argument with a friend and then be alright in the end, then they were never your friend. That’s how I see it at least.

“I never thought such a thing … to be as old as we are and hold grudges over something so simple … foolish,” I said, giving Luna a small smile which she returned with a larger and … well, less sad one.

For the rest of the night we just sat in silence, neither of us really doing more than minor shuffling around or sipping the tea provided. Every once and awhile Luna would disappear briefly, only to return a minute or two later.

The night had become peaceful once again.

…

Alright, that’s it for this chapter. Sure I could go on, but I think I have to lay down for a bit. All of those memories … it took a lot out of me. Come back next time for a brighter segment … a much brighter segment to be sure.

Author's Notes:

Emotional Roller-coaster! Come get your tickets to the Emotional Roller-coaster! Just one ticket will buy your way into the mind of a semi-broken man!

So yeah, lots of stuff happened, and I know there needs to be clarifications but I can't recall them so instead I will answer them as your bring them up.

Also, a big note, this is going to be the last posted chapter for a bit. I need to create a backlog again before I can post. So I need to finished Chapter 10-12 before I post again. Don't worry, I can nearly clear a chapter in a week or two so it won't be too long.

Questions and comments are enjoyed as usually.