“Figure it out yet?” I stopped staring into the snake’s eyes long enough to answer Ren.

“No.” We were two days from the snake temple (a place we both decided to never visit/talk about ever again) and during that time the bracelet had sat on my wrist and refused to come off.

“You can’t rush these things. Just let it alone and its secrets will be revealed when you need them.”

“Thank you oh wise master. You truly are the Yoda of Equestria.”

“Who’s Yoda?”

“A mystical green midget.” For that line I received one arched eyebrow.

“You humans are weird.”

“Oh you have no idea. The stuff on Rule 34 alone…”

“What’s rule 34?”

ABANDON THREAD!

“Nothing! Nothing at all!”

“Are you sure? It sounds like something.”

“It’s not. Can we change topics please?”

“Does it have something to do with the internet?”

“Yes and that’s all I’m going to say about it.”

“But…”

“Ren, consider this a subject on par with your past! It is something you do not want to know! I will only tell you if you absolutely need to know, which will never be the case! Ever! For the sake of both our sanities drop the subject now and never pick it up!”

The sheer amount of anger I displayed made his jaw dropped. Maybe I overreacted, but come on! Can you imagine actually explaining rule 34 to someone? It’s just one of those things you’re supposed to discover by accident one day, vow never to go near again, and then return to once your curiosity overwhelms you.

“All that rant did was make me want to know more!”

“Well tough shit because I’m sure as hell not having this conversation with you!”

We spent the next half hour in absolute silence. We just kept moving north. To Equestria. The excitement had kind of worn off by now, but it was still cool. And if we were going to the Everfree forest, it might not be too much trouble to take a detour to Ponyville. The residents might be frightened by a couple of cat people showing up out of nowhere, but I’m sure…

What the fuck?

“What’s that sound?"

“I…don’t know.” A strange droning sound filled the air accompanied by the faint smell of…something. It was familiar, like I’d heard it before. And it was coming from behind the next cluster of trees.

We shared a glance. Wordlessly, the both of us drew our blades and slowly walked around the tree. What we found…

“SWEET GODS OF FUCK!”

It MIGHT have been a panther. Once. Now it was just a rotting lump of diseased flesh. A swarm of flies surrounded the carcass and even from twenty feet away we could see maggots crawling around inside it. Judging by the cracked bones, the thing had been partially eaten and left to rot. I really hoped it died first.

At least I knew what the sound was. It was the drone of thousands of flies swarming the corpse. Far too many to be natural. Something else was at play here.

“What did this?” I asked Ren. He pulled a couple strips of spare leather out of his bag and handed one to me. Following his lead, I tied it around my face as a makeshift medical mask.

“I don’t know.” We approached the corpse cautiously. As we did so, the flies scattered. Even through the leather, the stench was unbearable. Ren leaned down and started examining the ground around the creature. “This was not some random occurrence.”

“What do you mean?”

“There is a small pile of ashes over here, as well as flattened grass. There are a few holes in the ground. Probably where they placed torches. There are footprints everywhere in sets of two. Bipedals. These were thinking creatures.” I gave it a look. Sure enough, there were signs of intelligent life here. I followed one set of tracks to the edge of the clearing. They continued off into the jungle.

“Could one of the other tribes have done this? Maybe the Lacuni.”

“No,” he said, shaking his head. “Even the Lacuni are respectful enough to bury their waste.” He looked distastefully at a small pile of…leavings piled up against the black tree. “And even then, I don’t know of any tribes that could do…that to a tree.”

“Hmmm…” I stared at the scene around me. It was strange. The undergrowth wasn’t the vibrant green that blanketed most of the forest. Everything in a fifty foot radius had turned an ugly yellow. It was…unnerving. “It looks like they were headed east.”

“Yes. They were…” He trailed off and got this look on his face. It was a look I’d come to associate with in deep thought. “Whatever did this is obviously dangerous. To us, to the wildlife, and to anyone stupid enough to cross paths with them.” I nodded in agreement.

“We have to warn people about…whatever this is.”

“As much as I hate to admit it, you’re right. If they can do that to one of the jungle’s great hunters then they are obviously a threat. And all the dead plants…” He let out a heavy sigh. “It doesn’t bode well.”

“So…east then?”

“Yes.” He took another glance at the corpse. “But first, we need to take care of the body.” I nodded and the two of us got started on a fire.

“Found another one.” Three days, three more camps. Each fresher than the last. We were gaining on them. And we were slowly becoming more and more pissed. At nearly every sight there was the corpse of a random animal. Sometimes they were even strewn about the path, uneaten. Whatever the hell these things were. They killed for fun and the bodies they left were ALWAYS diseased.

“They’re still moving east. Come on. If we hurry we can catch them soon.” I nodded and the two of us quickly burned the slain tapir and dashed off.

We ran in silence. There was nothing to say. What had started out as a simple run of curiosity was quickly turning into a manhunt. If we actually caught these people, blood was nearly a certainty.

I was actually enjoying the hunt. There was a certain excitement attached to chasing an unknown enemy. The sense of danger and discovery was…exhilarating. And there was the added bonus of keeping my mind off…certain things.
When this game is over, my therapy bill is going to be huge. I just know it.

After two hours of following the painfully obvious trail (definitely not natives) we heard it again. Flies were drawn to their kills. I don’t know why, but something spoils them somehow. The thought of even the killers eating them is enough to make my stomach turn.

“Sounds like a big one. Maybe multiple bodies.”

“Right. Be cautious. This could be a trap.” We put on the leather cloths we’d been using as facemasks and crept towards the source of the noise. Three days of this and the smell would still get me every time. I imagined it would be like living in Europe during the time of the bubonic plague. Except without all the religious…

“Oh god.”

Instead of an animal we found five people. Grey cats who were rotting in the heat. Three of them were lying haphazardly on the ground, various wounds showing what killed them. Another was lying in a pile of soot next to a tree. Most of the flesh was gone, leaving a pile of blackened bones. It was obvious he’d been burned alive.

But the fifth…she was the worst. They’d nailed her to a tree with arrows and…If you’ve ever seen Event Horizon…the scene in the medical bay. You know the one.

All of them were covered head to toe in flies and maggots.

I ran back into the jungle and left my breakfast on the forest floor. The battles I’d been in, all two of them, they weren’t like that. The losers died quickly and were hopefully spared too much pain.

This was DELIBERATE TORTURE! The first three were killed in the actual fight, but the other two had been left alive and killed for amusement! The animals I could handle. There’s just something different when you know that the corpse had been a walking, thinking creature.

“Are you all right?” Ren had followed me and was now giving me that look people give you when asking if you’re all right when you clearly aren’t.

“What the hell was that?”

“A Voltess hunting party. Or at least it was.” He turned his gaze back to the sight. I knew what he was going to say and I dreaded it. “We need to take another look. Maybe find some clues as to who did this.” I grimaced.

“I don’t want to go back there.”

“I know, but we have to.” There was no doubt we’d catch them. Every day we got a little closer. But we had no idea who they were, how many there were, or what kind of weapons they had besides bows. If we were going to have any chance when we caught up to these guys, we needed info.

Glumly, I followed him back into the clearing.

“Whoever they were, they’re trained. The Voltess are strong. I don’t see one enemy body. Either they bury their dead or it was an ambush.”

“They don’t have any conscious either,” I said while trying not to stare at the vivisected woman. “They won’t hesitate in a fight.”

“Unless they’re cowards, but that’s unlikely. I don’t think they stayed here that long. The undergrowth is still alive.” Another notable feature of our enemy was that they seemed to kill plant life passively. The grass turned yellowish brown and died anywhere the creatures stayed more than a few hours. It was extremely unnerving.

“What could do something like this?”

“No idea. Outcasts sometimes snap and turn to torture, but that wouldn’t explain the rot.” He brought his face close to one of the injuries on a corpse. How he could stand the smell, I’d never known. “I want to say a diseased animal did this, but that wouldn’t explain the campsites, the arrows, or these wounds.”

“Maybe a local tribe caught something. Like a rage virus.” He gave me a blank look.

“Do I even want to know what a rage virus is?”

“Well, it’s kind of like a zombie virus except-”

“Stop right there.” That blank look had changed to one that said ‘your idea is stupid, and you should feel stupid.’ “If you start spouting nonsense about the undead then I will drag you back to Valen and have Rakk examine your head.”

“Fine. But when were holed up in a shopping center and the horde eats your face, don’t come crying to me.”

“Noted.” He turned back to the scene and muttered something along the lines of ‘crazy humans.’ “Still, you might be on to something. If a tribe caught a disease that turned them violent, it’s likely they would go on some kind of rampage. But that still doesn’t explain the dead plants.”

“Magic?”

“Obviously.” Cartoon logic and magic. With those four words I can explain anything in the universe. “Definitely not Equestrian. They’re all happy sunshine up there.”

“Glad that’s where were headed then. Aren’t there other creatures with magic?”

“Tons, but none I know of with powers like this.” He stood up and looked to the east. “We’ll know soon enough. These corpses are fresh. If we move now we might catch them tomorrow night.” He stood up and started moving.

“Wait.” He looked back at me. His expression annoyed. “Shouldn’t we…you know?” I motioned at the remains.

“No. Leave them for the Voltess.” At my questioning look he explained. “Each tribe has different burial rituals. I don’t know what the Voltess do, so burning them could jeopardize them religiously. I would rather not have a group of experienced hunters after us. Besides…” He trailed off for a moment. “They deserve to know what happened. No matter how horrible it is.”

It made sense I guess. If something happened to one of my family, I’d rather know than be left wondering. Were my family looking for me? I’d been gone for nearly three weeks. Were they wondering what happened to me? And…

This body I’m using. Was his family missing him?

I cut that train of thought. No good would come from pursuing it. Besides, Ren was already moving. I didn’t want to get lost.

Again.

Don’t ask.

I followed him for a moment, but something made me stop. I couldn’t put these bodies to rest, but there was one thing I could do.

Solemnly, I walked over to the gutted woman and gently closed her eyes.

It was time.

Ren had been wrong. We found there next campsite almost immediately. The creatures weren’t traveling during the day, they were traveling at night. And we were right on top of them.

We got a good sleep that night, planning to ambush them right in the middle of the day. Hopefully we’d have an advantage. The marks had become clearer as we’d gotten closer. There were at least ten. Maybe more. It was enough to make us discuss getting help from another tribe.

In the end we dismissed the notion. At least until we figured out what we were up against. Begging for help with hard facts generally worked better than using guesswork and assumptions.

And those facts would become clear in just a few moments. The creatures had camped just beyond this group of trees. The two of us crept across the branches (I’d gotten pretty good at tree-walking) towards the sound of their campfire.
Quiet as can be, the two of us peaked out of the leaves into the clearing. There, I got my first look at something I’ve come to hate more than anything else.

“Skaven.”

Now if you are a Warhammer addict or have read Gotrek and Felix (incredible books) you know what Skaven are. Disgusting little rat people who seek to destroy the surface world and all who dwell upon it. The Equestrian version? They’re taller at least. About six feet.

Before me I could see a group of them lounging around a campfire. Why they had a campfire in the middle of the day I would never figure out. They were essentially rats in man’s clothing. Most of them just wore what looked like leather jerkins. They were carrying swords, spears, looked like one or two had axes.

But there was one off to the side and by all the gods that ever existed, he was REPULSIVE. The…thing was decked out in green robes and wearing a bandolier covered in vials. Even from this distance I could see an uncountable amount of sores, open wounds, cysts, and things I don’t even know the name for! Nor do I want to! Hell, I could SMELL him from where I was! New Delhi sewer workers would flee from him. At least we know what was killing the grass. All the plants around him were slowly dying.

A final Skaven was hiding in the shade under the trees. I couldn’t get a good look at him. Only thing I could tell was he wearing black robes with the hood drawn up and had a staff with a black jewel on top.

Practically screamed shadow priest.

“How do you know what Skaven are?” I asked Ren. He looked at me with surprise.

“How do you? The legend is known only by our people.”

“There were some of the main villains in a book I used to read. What do you mean legend?”

“I always thought they were just a story told to kits so they’d stay in the village at night. I never actually thought…” He trailed off for a few moments, staring at the creatures with a mix of horror and revulsion.

“Uh, Ren? The legend?”

“Right. I’ll skip the theatrics. Essentially, they are a race of vicious rat people that live deep underground between the pits of hell. They hate all surface dwellers and go out of their way to bring misery and death upon them. They are masters of disease and shadow magic’s and uses them to great effect. The legend says they steal away idiot children who leave town at night.”

“Disease and shadow magic, don’t like people up here, nocturnal, and essentially bogeymen that no one believes in. Anything else.” He thought for a few moments.

“Well, that…thing over there and the one under the tree certainly prove that they have magic. The legend also said they worship the number thirteen. They always travel in groups of that number.”

“So there are thirteen down there?”

“I would assume. Start counting.”

Let’s see…there’s the three soldiers they left up as sentries. About…seven more sleeping around the fire. That…thing. And last but not least, we have shadow boy over in the corner. That adds up to…

“I got twelve.”

“Same. Too close to be a coincidence.”

“Then where’s number thirteen?”

“Right behind you.”

For a moment, there was absolute silence save to the sound a bow being drawn. It really allowed me to appreciate our stupidity.

“We really should have seen this coming.”

“Probably. I’ve been following you idiots for the past two hours.” His voice was surprisingly normal. I expected something higher or rougher. Didn’t even have an accent. “And are we really a legend?” Ren slowly nodded. The bastard behind us laughed. “Nice to know the Bast still remember us.”

“Bast?” I heard Ren mutter.

“Now then. Would you prefer to be made into hats or boots?” I could literally here the sneer in his voice.

“Hmm…” I pretended to think about it for a moment, because…well what the fuck was I supposed to do. “Tough choice. I’ve never been a hat person, but I hate feet. Could I be made into a coat?”

“HA! Sure. We’ll count that as you’re last request. Now drop.”

I looked over to Ren. He nodded solemnly and jumped out of the tree. I followed. The three sentries were waiting for us, blades drawn. Now that I was closer I could see that each of them had plain brown fur. Their faces were essentially just a rats muzzle with red irises.

“Look! More kitties to play with!”

“Aren’t they cute?”

The one in the center very forcefully pointed his spear towards the campsite. The meaning behind it being obvious, we began walking. The three rats took up positions to the front and sides with our unknown assailant taking up the rear. They led us straight in front of the fire and stopped. All the Skaven were awake and staring at us with cruel sneers.

This could have gone better.

“Pretty kitties,” said a voice that belonged in the trash with its owner. The plague carrier was advancing towards us, glee written across the ruin of his face. His fur (the parts that hadn’t fallen out) was an unhealthy tan. I could see several of his fingers missing. Whether that was deliberate, a war wound, or just a result of the putrid state he was in was impossible to tell.

What’s surprising is that the smell actually got STRONGER the closer he got. I was fighting a losing battle.

SHIT! Please don’t let it touch me! To anyone who is listening; I will do whatever you want if you get that thing away from me!

“Stop!” Thank you! “Go back to your corner! You’re scaring our guests,” said the cloaked figure. The rotting creature hissed angrily and walked back to edge of the clearing. The air became breathable again. Barely.

“Now then…” The leader stepped out of the shadows giving us a good look at her. Yeah, it was a girl. No man could pull off that walk. The little bit of her face I could see was pure onyx black with the same red eyes as the rest of them. She was wearing black robes inscribed with silver runes and had a long, silver chain the hung about hallway down her chest. Her worm-like tail also had a chain wrapped around it with a spike attached to the tip. “Who do I have the honor of addressing?”

“Just some Bast I found stalking in the trees,” Said the one who caught us. As he stepped into view, the bow that was previously pointed at my head was shouldered. He was also wearing a sword strapped to one hip and had a brace of throwing daggers. Most of his face was hidden by a mask, save for a tiny line of grey fur around the eyes. His armor was full body dark leather. “Figured you want to interrogate them first considering the…overzealous way our boys treated the last few.” He glared at the soldiers who looked ashamed. The rotting one just cackled.

“Thank you very much.” He bowed deeply.

“I live only to serve the priesthood.”

Oh great. They’re a Theocracy.

“So, who are you to intrude on my rest?” We remained silent. “What? Cat got your tongue?” It took every bit of willpower I had not to facepaw. Especially when the soldiers started laughing. “Alright then. Dear, I believe these nice kitties want to play with you.” The rotting one looked up and smiled. He slowly started advancing…

“I’m Jack, he’s Ren!” Did I just call myself…Good God, It’s growing on me.

“Now was that so hard?” The priestess started walking towards me. I instinctively backed up until I felt something cold and sharp poke into my back. That thing flipped around and shoved me forward until I was about a foot from the priestess. For a time, everything was silent as she stood staring. Appraising. It was eerily familiar to the time a couple weeks back when another black clad bitch gave me the same look.

“Not bad.” Wait…what? “The color’s nice and the eyes are stunning. There is the little…issue.” Without any warning whatsoever, she reached out and grabbed my prosthetic. I tried to pull away, but the cold steel on my back reminded me who was in charge. She moved my arm at will, turning it over and over. “Still colorblind I see. I suppose I could get it painted…” She broke out into a huge grin. “I might keep you!”

“WHAT!” both I and Ren shouted in the same breath.

“Of course, there is the problem of feeding you. You’d also need someplace to sleep. And the Thirteen only know if you’re housebroken.” Apparently, I just became a house cat. “Maybe I should just get you stuffed.” Or not…

“Hold on a second!” She struck me across the face. Hard.

“Did I give you permission to speak?”

“Wha-” She hit me again.

“Good pets only speak when spoken to!” she screamed. This was definitely the third-worst day I’ve ever had. The second being Atheris and the first…you know. “If you don’t want to be put over my mantle I suggest you behave. I’ll decide on the way back to Sheol. For now, we have a mission to complete.” She snapped her fingers and the troopers jumped to attention. “Do what you want to the old one. Keep this one under guard.”

The trooper rats let out a cheer and began to advance on Ren. We shared a look. It was a mutual decision. Clichéd as it was, if we were going out, we were going out…

“Wait!” All eyes turned to the walking infestation. He sniffed the air a few times, hobbling ever closer to us. Right before I lost my breakfast he stopped and raised on sickly paw in my direction. “He smells funny.”

I smell funny? How the hell would he know? He’s missing half his fucking nose!

“Hmmm…” The priestess walked right up in front of my face and started sniffing me. It was one of the weirdest things that has ever happened to me. “You’re right.” She backed up and lifter her staff. Jewel on top glowed with some kind of…reverse light. She ran it up and down my body like a scanner. When she was finished, her eyes grew wide. Not a good sign.

“Change of plans. We’re taking them both. Whatever is going on up here, he’s a part of it. Specter!” The bow-rat saluted. “Where’s the closest entrance to Sheol?”

“Black Marsh. The Kobold observation post. It’s about three days from here.”

“Good. We’ll head there as soon as that accursed fireball sets. Whoever’s on sentry duty, tie them up and keep a close watch. The rest of you, get some sleep. On the other side of the clearing Rotter!” Guess which one Rotter is?

The three trooper rats produced some rope from…somewhere. Did this world have hammer space? It would definitely explain where I kept putting my wooden hand when I took it off. Weird. I wordlessly asked Ren if we should do something. He shook his head no. I assumed he meant something like ‘Wait till the time is right.’

And that’s how we ended the day. Tied up in a clearing surrounded by Skaven who were either taking us prisoner, adopting us as pets, or…something worse. I wasn’t exactly sure.

Yeah. That definitely could have gone better.