[Crisis Scar]

“You really think you can just come knocking?” Belly asked over Echo once Wilhelm and Jack had easily dispatched the token force that was outside the installation’s walls.

“This is our house!” Red declared as two old Dahl turrets deployed near the top of the wall and began spamming laser fire at the mercs who took cover, Jewel having smartly taken cover when the fighting started earlier was there too.

“Okay, we have three options here, Jack.” Wilhelm said. “We can just fight through them normally, like idiots. We could jump around and avoid some idiots, like smart people…”

“What’s the third option?” Jack asked as he pat Jewel’s head, the little Jumbuck being incredibly calm considering the constant combat around her.

“Ya know that truck right there?” Wilhelm asked. “Let’s do something badass about that gate. Who knows, those idiots might actually be smart enough to keep it closed when the turrets are down. Things are different in reality.”

“So option three is to go all Rambo, and drive a truck through a reinforced military gate, dash through tons of idiots shooting at us, jump over a small building to bypass at least half of RedBelly’s crew, and then confront RedBelly with all his crew coming at us too?” Jack asked rhetorically. “I’m all for it. We don’t have the time to be careful. Jewel, I’m going to transmit you someplace safe, okay girl?”

Jewel woofed in consent, and Jack scanned her. “Jack, what is that? Why am I transmitting it to me?” Angel asked.

“She’s Jewel, my new pet Jumbuck.” Jack said simply as he pressed ‘send’ and she digistructed for transmission, and thanks to Angel having corporate clearance, Jack avoided a hefty Echo Shipping Fee.

“The Fuck’s a Jumbuck?” Angel asked. “Sorry.”

“Girl, is there something wrong with you and cursing?” Wilhelm asked.

“I don’t approve of potty-mouths outside of extreme situations.” John answered for her. “I don’t want my baby girl to be a foul-mouthed haberdasher.”

“Also I figure it best to-aw~! She’s adorable~!” Angel cooed as she obviously received Jewel on her end. “Who’s a cute rock dog? You are! Yes you are!”

“Great~...like she doesn’t have enough pets...you better wrestle her away from her when you get back little bro, she already has three birds and a whale-squid.” John complained as Jack and Wilhelm moved into the garage.

“I’m...not going to bother asking how my niece has something as huge and deadly as a whale-squid as a pet, so, yeah, later.” Jack hung up as he got into the driver’s side and easily started up the old Dahl truck while Wil jumped into the truck’s bed. “Hold on to your testicles Wilhelm, cause this is going to be rough!” Jack, not giving two shits about the vehicle itself, slammed on the gas and the ridiculously powerful engine jumped the truck straight out of the garage, smashing open the side of the slightly closed door as he gained some distance from the gate, and did a U-turn.

“Holy hell! Is he gonna?!” Belly asked in astonishment.

“I think he is Belly! Back off lads!” Red shouted, and the scavs behind the gate dove out of the way as the turrets fired on the truck, only scorching the heavy-duty metal of the military truck, and just barely evaded the thing smashing through the gate like it was made of tin foil, and Jack and Wilhelm were laughing like maniacs the whole while. “G-get them! Get those badarses!”

“Bring in them stolen jets!” Belly ordered, and soon some Dahl jet fighters were lifting into the air as Jack ramped the truck up the stairs and the low gravity launched them right for the array.

“Okay Wil! We’re gonna have to jump!” Jack climbed out of his seat, Wil climbing out of the bed. They both jumped just as the roof of the array was nearing, but the truck was going to hit the building itself and likely explode epically.

“Awesome!” Wilhelm crowed as the truck DID explode epically on the side of the building as they landed, and neither of them looked back at the explosion as they stood up and began running around the roof of the array.

“Th-they didn’t even look at that explosion!” Belly cried out in shock.

“Their badassitude is off the charts Belly! What’re we gonna do?!” Red started to panic.

“Hold them lads! We have a deal to uphold!” Belly commanded, tons of scavs popping up from around the entire roof, turrets deploying, and jet fighters coming at them en masse. “We were paid by Mustard to keep the signal jammed! We’re all that’s between that space station and them deciding to blast Concordia!”

“... Wow. Not very smart, are they?” Wilhelm said to Jack. “Rule one, never tell your enemy who hired you. I’m just amazed they can’t hear us.”

“Belly you just told them who hired us! We didn’t turn off the general Echo broadcast!” Red fretted.

“Oh no! Get em even more now lads! They can’t tell anyone if they’re stuck in a Medivac cue! By then, Mustard will have gotten through the secure channels for evacuation.” Belly added, and it seemed that these scavs were actually dedicated to more than just attacking, as they clustered around the control panels on the far side of the relay’s roof, refusing to budge as others assaulted them.

“Funny thing is, I’m hearing and seeing all of this.” Angel snorted to them over the Echo. “And as for Mustard Seed, we’ve already gotten the confession from the fat mare’s mouth. The poor mare had no choice, Zarpedon forced her under threat of attacking Concordia right away. She did the responsible thing and gave them what they wanted; access to Helios. In exchange, she was given the chance to order an evacuation, but not to alert the galaxy at large by asking for military assistance, that’s where these scavs jamming general off-planet signals comes in.”

“Well that’s all well and good Angel, but we’re being swarmed out here! There’s little no cover. I’m just glad we have good shields, but the issue is we’re kinda running out of air!” Jack admitted as he jammed another air canister into his Oz kit. At least the scav’s suits being proper spacesuits had large air reservoirs to steal from after they killed them.

“Okay, that settles it. I have a gift for you two later, just don’t die, all the scavs that’ve been dying has seriously overloaded the local New-U cues, you’d be stuck in the system for several hours if you die. Even if Angel rerouted you, it’d take a few hours for all the data to transfer.” John warned as Jack mowed down a line of charging scavs while Wilhelm fired a Nukem rocket with perfect accuracy at an approaching jet fighter, sending bits of scrap everywhere.

“Jack. Get behind me and stay close.” Wilhelm said as he put away the Nukem and activated Wolf and Saint. “I’m going rugby style on you fuckers!”

“I thought you were kidding about your high-school rugby team!” Jack balked as Wilhelm got into a sprinting position while he juked and threw a longbow grenade at the scavs, only for a couple of big roos to take the blast and weather it with their shields.

“I was. Still know how it works. Still did a little bit with friends.” Wilhelm said. “SAINT HEAL ME! WOLF, COVER OUR TAIL!”

“On it, Alpha!” Saint and Wolf said in tandem.

“LET’S DO THIS!” Wilhelm yelled as he started charging towards the cluster of defenders around the control console.

“Damn it, I’m taking fire! I need some Jacks!” Jack shouted as his horn lit up and his Echo sparked, before two bigger, beefier, orange versions of him flickered into existence. “Yeah, that’s right! It’s a Badass Jack!” Jack cheered as he and his duplicates began using their wrist lasers to seriously cover Wilhelm’s charge, making his task easier, even if the Scavs he was charging at were practically pissing themselves, the big ones started charging him back.

“Out of my way fatasses!” Wilhelm growled as he barreled through the three charging outlaws that while bigger and heavier, didn’t have the strength or skill to avoid being tossed aside like yard pins. “Get away from the console!” Wilhelm demanded of the scavs who were clearly rigging the manual console to blow, and smashed them away, gibbing them so hard they flew like ragdolls off the cliff and out onto the lowlands.

“Noooo~! If they have access to the manual override, us guarding the control room is pointless!” Belly wailed angrily.

“Then you know what this means Belly?” Red asked rhetorically.

“It means we get some good ‘ol EVA that’s what!” Belly replied, and the scavs all backed off for a moment, giving Wil and Jack a moment to catch their breaths, as suddenly a cooling vent halfway up the relay’s stand burst off, and somehow, RedBelly leaped out, landing heavily with a butt-slam that knocked all the scavs too close off the building.

Title Card: RedBelly. Stand and Deliver, Your Life! RedBelly was a surprisingly imposing figure composed of two people.

Belly clearly was as big as other outlaw ‘class’ scavs, but was a bit more rotund, likely tending to his name/title of Belly, and he dual-wielded an auto pistol and...a Striker! This guy must really be a big-shot if he’s got a Legendary shotgun! And unlike other scavs, his whole body save his legs were covered in red-painted shield-like armor, the rest in a standard green spacesuit.

Red was a midget, which on Elpis and Pandora, was a sadly common defect caused by the environment rather than genetics. Red sat atop Belly’s shoulders, wearing a helm designed to match Belly’s armor. Said helm actually covered his whole body save his arms, which came out around and wielded an odd black smg that seemed to be a modified Hyperion Caustic smg. That was three guns coming from one opponent, that according to Echo, had both armor, shields, and was quite healthy.

“I just ate, so sorry if I try to make this quick.” Belly apologized.

“He gets all belchy! It’s gross!” Red complained.

“That sounds disgusting.” Wilhelm commented. “Please. Do NOT say any more about it, or I’ll make this quicker than the writers want it to be.”

“What the fuck are you talking about Wilhelm? We’ve got a serious pair of badasses, and their crew on us all at once! You can make stupid jokes later!”

“I made a joke?” Wilhelm questioned seriously. “No, I mean it. I blacked out there for a sec. The hell did I say?”

“Enough references! Git em lads!” RedBelly shouted at the same time, and all hell broke loose.

“Oh fuck!” Jack cursed as he rolled out of the way of Belly’s pistol fire, only to double-jump out of the way of a charging outlaw, and get rammed out of the air by a jet fighter, and then punched by a raider. “*spit, cough*, Wilhelm!”

“If you activate a single protocol, I will start shooting you instead!” Wilhelm said as he opened fire on RedBelly, the badass taking the shots with his shields as he kept Wilhelm at distance with unique smg fire and a couple precision shots of his blue-glowing Striker as most of their crew focused on keeping Jack busy.

“No, I need a little help and my copies won’t be ready again for a bit!” Jack ducked another punch from the raider, and punched the taller roo in the jaw, getting him to stumble back as Jack took out his TMP and unloaded into him, finishing him off as he rolled away from the outlaw again, shooting him in the back with his laser bracers, before having to jump away from a sweeping jet fighter’s laser.

“Luckily for you, Wolf and Saint are always ready!” Wilhelm tossed out the two grenade like digistruct containers that held Wolf and Saint, the surveyors deploying instantly. “Hold them off, Wolf! Saint, keep us in the green!”

“Yes, Alpha!” The surveyors yelled in tandem before setting to work. Wolf set out and started shooting caustic bullets at random scavs and RedBelly, while Saint floated around Wilhelm or Jack, healing any wounds they got from stray bullets.

“Lads, keep the scrawny one busy! This ones ours!” RedBelly declared, calmly moving towards Wilhelm, before suddenly breaking into a startling kangaroo spring-jump, Red still firing his caustic black smg at Wilhelm as Belly began his massive-radius butt-slam from their impressive height in the air. “*loud belch*!” “Ew, gross mate!”

“Shit!” Wilhelm cursed as he jumped, but while he avoided most of the damage to his shields, the knockback of the ridiculously powerful butt-slam almost knocked him off the relay, thankfully his Oz kit’s boost was enough to send him back on course, and he growled as he performed his own butt-slam, knocking RedBelly back a bit, but not by much due to Belly’s weight. “Up yours, you roo asshole!”

“That sounded racist Belly!” Red commented smugly as he kept up pressure with his smg, Wilhelm having to keep moving since his shield was getting low.

“It was, jackass!” Wilhelm yelled as he ran up and punched Red off of Belly’s head.

“Red! You cheeky bastard!” Belly growled, and his exposed roo face was twisted in a snarl, the startling fact that his eyes were completely blind was rather unexpected, the milky orbs likely being caused by the slash scar across his eyes, and the pissed roo literally flew into a blind rage, swinging the blade of his Striker wildly at Wilhelm, who barely back-stepped out of the way.

“He’s right in front of ya Belly! Keep on him!” Red directed from above thanks to the helm’s little jetpack, it was obvious now why Red and Belly were a team. Red was the eyes, Belly the brawn.

“Alpha!” Came the call of the passing Wolf who ducked in front of the blade to hold off Belly, only getting K.O.’d the second it made contact and allowing Wil to get out of Belly’s path.

“Damn it! No wonder his aim sucks, he just fires in the general direction that Red aims him. That can be worse than someone actually trying to hit since their shots can be unpredictable.” Jack said, only for Belly to react and shoot at him, taking down his shields and he coughed up blood as Saint rapidly responded to his plight while the scavs remained quiet, the reason obvious.

“You moron! He can hear you!” Wilhelm yelled, also causing Belly to shoot at him, the bullets breaking his shields. “Shit! Jack! We need more of ya!”

“On it! You’re promoted!” Jack joked as one of his copies was the big fiery kind, the other the normal blue kind, and Belly instantly wiped out the smaller one with a disturbingly well-aimed Striker shot, the fact the roo’s big ears kept twisting and turning said that the big lumbering oaf’s hearing was definitely beyond keen.

“Red to Belly! Permission to dock!” Red joked impishly, coming in close and Belly grinned as it seemed his main support was returning.

“Not if I can say something about-” Wilhelm said as he attempted to charge in again and smack Red away, only to get clocked by a wild swing from Belly when he got close. The blow sent Wilhelm to the floor, thankfully the blade of the Striker hadn’t hit him, just the body of the gun due to him over-reaching.

“Yer footsteps might as well be a thunderstorm!” Belly sneered gleefully before his partner’s helm/armor slammed back over him, which explained why there wasn’t a visor for him now. “How’s about we show you how we do it down-under? Back on Aus-End, before Dahl came and scooped us up, I was the village lookout! I kept everyone safe from Bunyips and all kinds of cruel beasties. I’m not about to let you idiots endanger those folks in Concordia. Zarpedon’s a bitch of her word, and we’re not letting you have her turn back on it.”

“Damn right! We’re all that’s keeping the Legion from aiming that laser straight for Concordia and giving us all time for Mustard to order evac for all them folks without Medivac! You ain’t getting this relay!” Red added on, the duo getting ready for another round, their silent crew all carefully positioning themselves as quietly as possible, the near dead-silence was deafening.

“You idiots, we’re trying to stop the Legion from blasting the moon! We’re trying to get the fucking base back from them!” Wilhelm said as he got up and lunged at Belly, blocking Belly’s swing and grabbing his Striker, locking him in a grapple with Belly.

“You’re the idiots! You don’t know Zarpedon! You don’t know Dahl! You think they were tough? You have no clue! You think we’re tough? We’re nothing! You need an army to face her, and we’re not about to go up against her without RIP’s say-so!” RedBelly screamed as Belly hooked his pistol under one of Wilhelm’s armpits, and tossed Wilhelm like he was a cardboard cutout as Red kept shooting him even as he was tossed away.

“Damn it, these guys are so annoying!” Jack complained as he restarted his assault on RedBelly’s crew, the scavs disturbingly precise and practiced in their attacks. “These can’t be mere scavs! We’ve only fought mercenary bands this coordinated before!” Jack jammed the blade of his rifle into a scav, firing a couple times to execute, and was panting as his Oz kit suddenly cut out, and he choked on the air trying to be sucked out of his lungs, and he winced as he dashed for an air canister.

“Jack!” Wilhelm shouted, only to notice how low his own air was.

“Feeling the strain? The cold? The pressure? Shame ya came here unprepared.” RedBelly mocked, their crew laughed over the Echo. “Give up, and we’ll just send ya into the que nice and quick.”

Wilhelm looked around, the situation was not good. RedBelly had them on the ropes, the deck was stacked against them, they needed constant air, but RedBelly and their crew had proper suits and systems while he and Jack had cheap short-term Oz kits that were really only meant for emergencies. “Wilhelm.” Angel’s voice was a godsend, but the fact that nobody else seemed to respond meant she had him on a private channel. “Wilhelm, aim seven degrees to your left, and-”

“ENGLISH, WOMAN!” Wilhelm yelled over echo. “ENGLISH! DO YOU SPEAK IT?!”

“But that is!” Angel yelled back over echo. “And I’ve heard you talk with Jack about-”

“SHUT IT! THIS IS BATTLE! I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR TECHNICAL SHIT!”

“JUST SHOOT THE FUCKING FLOOR YOU STUPID CUNT!” Angel screamed, and a highlight of the Echo lit up a specific power cable next to RedBelly’s right foot.

Not hesitating since the lady mared up and just outright told him to, Wilhelm shot the cable with his shotgun, and when it was damaged, suddenly, the immediate area shuddered as emergency air bubble generators popped out and flared up, stunning everyone at suddenly having free oxygen.

“THANK YOU!” Wilhelm yelled over echo once more. “Expect next time I see you to get socked in the jaw.”

“I’m ripping your optic out with my bare fingers you ignorant little-!” Angel was cut off, likely by John since her connection was hung up.

“Heh, I can’t wait.” Wilhelm said to himself before getting floored by RedBelly. “YOU CHEEKY DICKWAFFLE!”

“Press em lads! Press em!” Belly ordered with a hint of panic in his voice.

“Don’t give em an inch!” Red insisted, also panicking. They knew the EVA was their biggest advantage here, and with the atmo, all the extra noise would make Belly’s hearing harder to rely on. “He’s right in front of us! FIRE!”

“Suppressing!” Belly shouted, spraying wildly in front of him at Wilhelm, who grinned as he easily kited ahead of Belly’s extensive pistol’s spray. “I’m not hearing him clearly! Where is he?!”

“Damn it, Belly! I knew we should’ve bought ya some new eyes! Right! RIGHT!” Red screamed as Jack was much more effectively fighting off the scavs now that he didn’t have breathing issues. “Put the Striker down Belly! That thing’s not helping ya!” Belly obediently holstered his Legendary Shotgun, and took to steadying his aim with his pistol instead. “Can we have a minute?”

“Shoryukan.”

“Why thank you, mate, that’s very much-.”

Wilhelm got right up in front of RedBelly and uppercutted Red off of Belly’s head and knocking Belly back slightly.

“Little fucker!” Jack shouted, getting the airborne midget’s attention, only for Red to suddenly choke as Jack had leaped up at him, and stabbed his bayoneted rifle up into the helmet, stabbing the little roo in his lower abdomen. “Such is Bite, bitch!” Jack yanked on the trigger as fast as he could, pumping the little guy with lead, causing him to drop his unique gun and gurgle blood, before he vanished in digistruction.

“RED! NO~!” Belly screamed, only for Wilhelm to punch him in the armor so hard, it warped inward, and he was sent flying back into the relay tower as Wilhelm stole his Striker in the same move. “I’ll...I’ll kill you...I’ll KILL ALL OF YOU~!” Belly roared, only for Wilhelm to shoot out his left knee. “AH!” Then using the other shell in the legendary two-shot Striker, shot out his other knee. “AH~!” The special effect that must’ve been added post-production to the gun let the buckshot pass clear through his shields, and Belly was on his bleeding knees, teeth grit, when he felt the barrel of his former shotgun pressed into his temple. “...Such...is Life….”

Wilhelm pulled the trigger, blowing Belly’s head off and he instantly digistructed. All the scavs were stunned silent, and Wilhelm snorted a little blood out of his nose. “Well? Are you going to keep getting in our way?”

“RUN!”

At the sudden terrified scream, all the roos ran with their suit-covered tails wildly flicking about in fear. RedBelly was the strongest of their crew. They weren’t going to fuck with the two assholes that did them in.

“That’s more like it.” Wilhelm said in a strangely calm voice. “Come on, Jack. Let’s get this over with.”

“Oh! My! GOG!” Wilhelm paused at Jack’s extremely pleased exclamation, and saw him literally drooling over the black, red, and green smg that Red had dropped. “It’s a PURE Hyperion gun! Most companies mix and match their parts for best effect and to help even out competition, but this. This is a gem!” Jack looked at it in his Echo. “RedBelly’s Black Snake. Stats are pretty average, but it’s Blue and has red flavor text like I said before; Such Is Bite. Heh!” Jack cradled his new gun, and aimed at one of the relay consoles around the tower that they might need to destroy, and the twin fang-like shot was impressively close together at that distance.

“Jack, focus. Let’s just finish the damn mission.” Wilhelm said in the same tone.

“Okay, I’m calm, I’m back. Sorry. Dad gave me some pills for my anger issues.” Angel admitted. “It’s sorta a genetic thing, our anger problems. Do you have fits of pure unnecessary rage uncle Jack?”

“CAN YOU BOTH JUST SHUT IT?!” Wilhelm yelled at the top of his lungs. “Seriously! We have a mission to do.”

“Shut up Wil, my niece is asking me a question. Yes. I do. Very much so, but usually Wilhelm flies off the handle enough for me so I don’t do it as often. Now then, how do we take this thing down?” Jack asked as he moved to the manual override console RedBelly and their crew had tried so hard to keep from them.

“That console, just plug your Echo into it and I’ll take care of it.” Jack promptly did so, and then stormed up to Wilhelm to pat him on the shoulder.

“Dude, you okay James?” Jack asked, since without his Echo, Angel wasn’t likely to hear them.

Wilhelm turned off his Echo before responding. “I don’t even know, Ryan. That Scav… He’s not even like the others. It’s like he actually knew what it meant to fight, and fight with honor. Like, it’s as if he knew what it’s like to be a respectable guy, instead of just another random bum… I could actually see him as an equal instead of just another piece of meat to blast into oblivion…”

“So you feel guilty now...you only killed him because you had to.” Jack reasoned, and Wilhelm nodded his head.

“He was hired for a job. And he died trying to complete it. That’s something both I...and Wilhelm can respect.” James said. “You know what I was, Ryan… At least you know what I was trying to be. I was a musician! And while I may not have had the same shit Wilhelm had to deal with, I still knew what it meant to get hired to do something and get it fucking done! Hell, there were those times where I was hired to do songs I absolutely hated, like Canon in D! Or events that I didn’t want to do! You know how I complained about that! I still got it all done, though! And you already have memories of what Wil went through!”

“Yeah...I guess RedBelly and their crew really were doing what they felt was best. And we’re the assholes who fucked it all up. Either way though, it had to be done. You know I’m a cold person, that I have almost no honor outside protecting the helpless, both as me, AND as Jack, but...I just want you to know I don’t think less of you for this.” Ryan insisted.

“Hello? Uncle Jack?” Angel’s voice echoed out from Jack’s Echo at the console. “You can pick it back up, the relay is-.” The dish of the relay suddenly went lax, powering down. “Shut down.”

“C’mon Wilhelm, we have a world to save.” Jack insisted, moving for his Echo, and Wilhelm took a calming breath.

“I know.” Wilhelm looked at his new Luneshine Doc’s Striker. “I know.”

Author's Notes:

"DJ, where'd you come up with the Shoryukan joke?"
"Data not found."
"... You're ripping off Team Four Star, aren't you?"
"Aren't you?"
"Data not found."

Also, we had an EPIC song lined up for the battle, but for some reason the URL wasn't "valid", wtf FiM/YT?!