Authors note: Someday, if I believe hard enough, this will be featured. Believe it! Anyways, here's that all-Rarity chapter that everyone has (not) been asking for.
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Rarity sat alone in her boutique sipping a glass of wine that she held aloft with her ultra unicorn magic while reading the local newspaper. She always took pride in staying up to date on local events, not to mention it helped with her night job that she had picked up recently. After reading the cornicopia (I really thought that was a word) of gossip that adorned the first page she flipped to the second page. She did love the gossip in the newspaper, and apparently so did everypony else because it was always on the front.

The second page, however, had an interesting story. 'Three ponies found dead by lemonade'. Rarity reread the frontline before concluding that she hadn't read it wrong. It certainly was interesting enough to catch her attention, so she continued to read it.

Apparently, earlier in the day three ponies were found dead. From what the police reported, the victims had no connection to each other and all their internal organs were replaced by lemonade. At the scene of the crimes, there was no indication of a fight or any explanation as to why or how they have been, as the newspaper coined, 'lemonadeifide'. Like always, the local police were at a loss for what to do. They really did suck, perhaps they just needed more experience or training. Rarity also suspected that it was because all the police had donut cutie marks. What the hell do donuts even have to do with being a police officer?

No matter, now Rarity could do what she loves to do most. No, not designing clothes, that's only a hobby now. For you see, after the 'mare do well' incident over a year back, Rarity found the true meaning of her cutie mark. It has nothing to do with fashion, though she still enjoys that. No, the diamonds represented justice. Pure, unwavering, justice. So, she fights crime. She redesigned the 'mare do well' costume and now she's batmare.

She wasted no more time dilly dallying with the paper and ran upstairs to her sister's room. Fighting crime wasn't easy, but thankfully she had a sidekick to help her. That sidekick was none other than Sweetie Bell, or 'Raven' which is her super hero name. Perhaps someday she'd even get a cutie mark in justice like Rarity.

"Sweetie Bell, put on your costume. We're going out tonight." Sweetie Bell just nodded, she was used to this. After saying that Rarity ran back to her own room and opened the dresser. There, sitting neatly folded, was a black leather outfit. She slipped it on and then walked over to a mirror. The outfit was designed to cover every inch of her body, even her eyes were covered by thin fabric, so that no pony would know it was her. It was also black so she could sneak through the night easier and it even had a stylish cape. Sweetie Bell soon entered the room dressed in a similar costume and they nodded to each other.

"To the ponymobille!"

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na batmare!

The two of them ran down the stairs to the first floor of the house and then down some more stairs that were hidden under a secret hatch. The stairs led into a basement that looked like it was just a repurposed cave. The walls were covered in all types of high tech computers and such and in the middle of the room was none other than the ponymobille. It was literally just an apple cart that Rarity had stolen from Applejack and painted black.

She quickly jumped in the back while Sweetie Bell strapped herself to the front and started pulling it. Suddenly a big hole opened up in the ground outside allowing them to pull the ponymobille out and into the streets of Ponyville. As soon as they excited it closed again, thus concealing the secret entrance to the pony cave.

Now that they were out, it was time to find out who's behind the murders. Sweetie Bell pulled the cart around Ponyville for a while with Rarity sitting in the back. She is simply far too fabulous to pull it, also she told Sweetie Bell she might get a cart pulling cutie mark if she keeps at it. Then Rarity spotted a pony walking alone through the streets.

"I see a suspect." Whispered Rarity to her sidekick. Sweetie Bell knew what to do, she pulled the ponymobille into a nearby alley so they wouldn't be seen. They left the cart there and snuck towards the unsuspecting pony who seemed to just be minding her own business. Once she was close enough, Rarity simply grabbed the pony in her super pony magic and picked her up off the ground.

"Hey, what the hay is going on?!" Cried the pony.

Rarity moved up to the pony and stared into her eyes for a few seconds, it was one of the background ponies that nobody cares about. Then she said in as deep a voice as she could, "Who are you working for?!"

The pony was clearly startled by suddenly being picked up and interrogated in the middle of the night. "What are you t-talking about?"

"Don't play stupid with me! I know what you did. Now answer me! WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR!?"

"I honestly don't know what you're talking about!"

Rarity was frustrated at this point. This pony wasn't going to cooperate easily, but she could fix that. She simply climbed up a nearby thatch roof building and carried the pony up with magic.

"Wha-what are you doing?!"

Rarity then held the pony over the edge of the building, it was a solid two story drop to the ground. The pony could easily hurt a leg from such a fall, and you know what they do to lame ponies. "Stop, what do you want?! I don't have any money! Please stop!"

"WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR!!?!??!"

"I'm not working for anypony, I swear to Celestia!"

"SWEAR TO ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

She was about to drop the pony to her pony doom when she began to hear the sound of the ocean. They aren't even anywhere near an ocean! Rarity was able to deduce that an ocean sound so far from the shore was no doubt evil and so she put the pony down on the roof. "Don't let me catch you out here ever again!"

The pony was in tears at this point because she was so scared. "I d-don't even know what I did wrong, I was just walking to my house! And how am I supposed to get down from this building?!"

Rarity just jumped off the roof, using her magic to catch herself before she hit the ground, and ignored the crying pony. Stupid earth pony, crying just because she doesn't have magic to get off the roof. What a baby! That pony should consider themselves lucky that Rarity didn't give her a generous beating. She is the element of generosity after all.

Now that she was on the ground, Sweetie Bell ran up and joined her as she ran towards the ocean sound.

"Where are we going now?" Asked Sweetie Bell.

"We're following the sound of the ocean, can't you hear it?"

Sweetie Bell cocked her head to the side and moved her ears around while they ran to try and detect the noise her sister was talking about. "I don't hear anything."

"Hmm, that's strange. I wonder why you can't hear it, perhaps we'll find out once we find the source of the noise."

They continued to run for a few minutes until the sound of the ocean seemed deafeningly loud to Rarity. Sweetie Bell still couldn't hear it for some reason. Eventually they got to an old warehouse by the edge of the town and Rarity was certain that this was where the sound was coming from. Her ears were starting to hurt from the noise, so she didn't even bother trying to sneak into the building. Instead, she simply rammed through the door with her side kick close behind.

"Who's in here?!" She yelled. The ocean sound was coming from in here for sure. She ran into the warehouse and past several stacks of boxes until she came to a part of the warehouse that was actually lit. There was one ceiling light turned on that cast a circle of light on the ground. As she got close she noticed something in the center of the light. It looked like a conch shell. Then the ocean sound abruptly stopped.

"Foolish fools, I will kill you all!"

Rarity jumped at the sudden voice and looked around but she couldn't see anypony else in there. "Tell me you at least heard that."

Sweetie Bell just shook her head 'no'. "I didn't hear anything."

Now this was just getting weird, why was she the only one hearing this? With nothing else to do, she walked up to examine the shell. It looked strange, mainly that it was a grayish black color instead of white like most conches and it was covered in spikes.

"You shouldn't have come here, now you will die mortals!"

"What, who are?!" Rarity couldn't be sure, but it seemed like the conch shell was the one talking to her.

"Who I am is not important, now enjoy your moosey fate!"

Rarity was about to ask what it meant by that when her head started hurting really bad. It felt kind of like her brain was being converted into lemonade inside of her skull. She grunted and fell to the ground clutching her head.

"Holy head lemonade Batmare! Are you alright?!" Asked Sweetie Bell. After not getting an answer from her, she decided that no, she was not alright. It wasn't hard to deduce that it was the conch shell doing this since it was the only thing in the area. So she did the only thing that she could, she ran up and kicked the shell.

POW!

The conch flew a few feet back from the blow and rolled a bit on the ground.

"If I wasn't a conch shell that would probably really hurt. Now you will die too foolish mortal!" After a few seconds, nothing happened. Sweetie Bell wasn't dying a lemonadey death for some reason. "Blagh! Why won't you die?!"

Sweetie Bell just walked up and started slapping the conch shell around again. She wasn't sure what was going on, but kicking the conch seemed like the right thing to do.

BAM!

KAPOW!

WIZZAM!

At this point the demonic conch was pretty confused as to why his mind attacks weren't working on this one. "Perhaps I have underestimated you, pony. You win this round, but I'll be back! Ahahahaha!" Then, suddenly, a stream of lemonade ejected from the bottom of the conch and it was projected up, off the ground, and through a nearby window where it flew away into the forest.

It looks like Sweetie Bell is victory once again! She /flex'd her arm as her epeen became larger. She had no idea what happened, but she won somehow. Jokes on demonic conch, she couldn't even hear what he was saying. She then turned to Rarity who was lying on the ground twitching and foaming from the mouth.

"Yay sis, we win!" There was no response from Rarity as she continued to spasm on the ground. "I wonder if I got a cutie mark for punching conches or something! Better get home to check." With that said, she grabbed onto Rarity's cape with her teeth and started dragging her through the dirt towards their house. Normally Rarity would be very angry at being dragged through the dirt, but right now she was too busy suffering some kind of lemonade induced brain damage.

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Sweetie Bell wasn't affected by the demonic conch because she's a robot. Duh, isn't it obvious?

This chapter took a while to type, mainly because I've been typing another story that I thought of. Don't worry, that one is only going to be like 1-2 chapters long at most, so I'll keep typing this still. Anyways, it's like 5000 words at the moment.

I don't know what compelled me to type a chapter about Rarity...
Alright, now that this is done, I can finally go to sleep.