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Scratch Space

by Palm Palette

Chapter 17: Review Recommendations

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Review Recommendations

Yes, we have a recommended folder, but not everyone can add to it. Also, the reason someone adds a story might not be apparent at first glance. In this thread, feel free to point out stories you see and why they caught your eye. Quick reminder—stories under one week old cannot be added/reviewed.


Lost in Darkness

This story is a literal wall of edge. Not only that, but in an accompanying blog post, the author admits to its being a self-insert as well. It has a typical self-inserty plot too, where the hero (Sombra) saves the damsel in distress (Derpy) from a monster (a hydra). He then lectures her about her low self-esteem. Derpy's co-worker who tripped her while they running from the hydra decides that she needs to die and tries to kill her. Sombra intervenes, gets into a battle with his own darkness, and is saved by love. The end.

Quote from story (first paragraph):

Pain, torment, utter agony. The shadows within him blazed and burned. It had not been like this since he first fell to the shadows. He could see the light, it scared him. It was painful. Too painful to look at. The pain was more than just how it burned away at his tainted soul, he could see their faces, every last one of them. He could hear their screams. WHY? He got what he wanted, security for the empire. Nopony alive could take what he loved away from him. Nopony... but himself. Their eyes make it stop!, why can I not stop seeing their eyes? Bloody and down cast. Their eyes looked up only in fear and submission. He loved his people but he still did this.

Quote from the blog post:

My latest story Lost in the Darkness is being misunderstood, a lot. People tend to look at it and think it is as they called it a "crack ship" Yes, it has an odd coupling and its a pseudo romance.

However, the thing that is not seen here and this is the personal thing. Its actually based very strictly on a true story. MY story. Almost every event, line, and character within is based on a real experience and or person. I grew up with a whole hell of a lot of darkness in my life. Pain and abuse, after that I joined the military and I saw even more.


better season 5 end

No, it's not capitalized. In fact, there are no capital letters in the description, either. Some poor sap proofread the story itself, so it's not all bad, but still kinda iffy. The writing is better than the rating suggests, but that's because the story is presented as a fix fic and fails at living up to its promise.

Here's a brief plot summary:

It starts with Twilight entering her map chamber and getting confronted by Starlight, who hits her with a spell, similar to the episode. Spike gets left behind. There's no time loop; Twilight just gets sent to an AU where the rainboom didn't happen, and Starlight follows her. She agrees to Starlight's revenge scheme, presumably as a ruse to build friendship. Then they get captured by Nightmare Moon. Starlight convinces Nightmare Moon to take her on as an apprentice, and... I didn't care to read anymore past that point.

Twilight is very one-dimensional in this story. Her dialogue consists almost entirely of "Friend! Friend. Friend?" At the point I stopped, Starlight Glimmer was having second thoughts so it seemed fairly obvious where the story was headed. Here's a quote:

"Ohohohahahahaha, you think you can openly bribe me on my throne? You are fearless aren't you?" Her smile was wide now.

"{Good she thinks I'm fearless, I was about to start shaking actually...} Not bribe, it's more like a purchase of loyalty. Here's my offer, I'll tell you everything you want to know," She gave the Nightmare a smirk, "and you make me, you're apprentice."

Next Chapter: What's Inside a Black Hole? Estimated time remaining: 1 Hour, 38 Minutes
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Scratch Space

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