Good morning my subordinates! This is your beloved Sun Goddess Celestia and you've been fairly good so I have decided to give you my analysis of "Magical Mystery Cure." Now this is a good one since I have a role in it, a very important role.

Well it is morning in Ponyville and Twilight has decided to burst into song. I think I know why, I think it is because she is still thinking about the the fun her and I had a few days ago and just can't get that happiness out of her system. Twilight is right when she says everything is certainly fine, for now. What a shame it won't stay that way. You see, Yours Truly decided to stir up some trouble. I have been planning something for quite some time that involves Twilight. This trouble I stirred up will be the ultimate test to see if she can truly handle what I have planned.

Well her little musical number comes to an abrupt end when she gets water dumped on her. Oh thank you Rainbow Dash, you made Twilight soaking wet! You know how hot and bothered that makes me but don't go thinking I'm going to give you any special favors over it. Well suddenly I see that it isn't Rainbow that made her look so hot, it was Rarity. Now why in Equestria is Rarity handling the weather...hmmm...I wonder! Well I will say this, despite her making Twilight extremely sexy, she sucks at handling the weather. A checkerboard sky? Seriously? That is why you don't let fashionistas handle the weather, they'll just screw everything up.

I am watching from up here in Canterlot and I see Rarity has Rainbow's cutie mark. What in the hay is going on down there. Now yeah, things certainly aren't fine now! Oh boy, this is going to be quite funny! What a shame Discord is off gathering herbs with Zecora, he would find this absolutely hilarious! He probably would have laughed himself to death.

Well now Twilight is headed off to Fluttershy's....wait, did I just hear that right? Did Twilight say that was Rainbow Dash's cottage? Either I'm hearing things or the writers really screwed this one up. Once Twilight get's to the cottage she discovers that Rainbow is in there and what is this, Rainbow Dash has Fluttershy's cutie mark. Now something bad has happened, very bad. I do worry about Rainbow's welfare though. Despite her having Fluttershy's cutie mark, she has no control over those animals.

Well Rainbow breaks out into song questioning her destiny as she tries to handle those beasts in the cottage. I can't help but wonder, how much shit piles up in that cottage with all those animals in there? Well given that Fluttershy keeps most of them outside probably not much. Since Rainbow has them all in there with her though, it's probably pretty bad.

Well now I'm watching all of Twilight's other friends break out into song as well. Let's see, suddenly Fluttershy has Pinkie's cutie mark but can't make ponies laugh, Pinkie has Applejack's cutie mark but can't do shit on the farm, Applejack has Rarity's cutie mark but can't make slutty outfits and like what happened earlier, Rarity has Rainbow Dash's cutie mark but can't handle the weather. What in Equestria happened. Well, I'm thinking my attempt at stirring up trouble and testing Twilight may have had unintended consequences.

Here is how it happened. I sent Twilight Starswirl's old magic book with his failed spell in it. I sent her a message telling her that I think she is the one to rewrite it and I promised that if she could fix it and make it work, that sexy times would ensue! Well I know how her mind works. She decides to cast the damn thing without knowing the first thing about it. The result? The element bearers all have the wrong mark now. I am now going to have to humble myself and apologize to Ponyville for doing this. Ugh I hate the thoughts of having to admit doing something wrong to commoners. Maybe some other disaster will take place and I can get out of it.

So now Twilight is starting a sob song. Another song? This makes three already! She's crying and whining about how she's fucked everything up royally and wondering what she's going to do. Waah, waah, waah. Well guess what Twilight, I'm not coming down there to fix this nor am I going to come down there and make you feel better. You screwed everything up and now you're gonna fix it!

Well Spike makes himself useful and convinces Twilight that she'll figure a way out to fix it. Yeah right, even I wouldn't know how to undo the damage she has done. Yes, even your all powerful and sexy Sun Goddess doesn't know everything so it is either Twilight fixes this or Ponyville will have to simply be abandoned and I'll cordon off that area forever.

Well she stares at a picture of her friends and starts to glow. How the hay is she doing that? She sure the hay never glows for me when we're having fun! Well now she gets Spike to get the elements and runs off acting like she's hot shit! She's thinking, "Oh yes! I know how to get everything right! Just you watch Tia, I'll do it!" Now that is a strike against her, NOPONY EVEN THINKS OF ME AS TIA! I'll have to punish her severely for this!

Well she runs off to find Fluttershy moving back to Cloudsdale. What? Why in Equestria would she want to move back to the place that brought her so much heartache as a filly? I'm wondering if maybe she is afraid that since she has a different mark that she may not be good in bed anymore and that is why she isn't moving up here to be with me. Well with the way things are going, Fluttershy losing her ability to perform in the bedroom may be the least of my problems.

Well Twilight manages to get her to go help Rainbow Dash with "her" animals despite her knowing absolutely nothing about them. Well they get over to "Rainbow's" cottage and suddenly it looks like Rainbow is going to get cooked by the animals! Oh shit, now not only am I partially responsible for ruining the element bearers, I may be indirectly responsible for the death of one of them. Crap, I knew I should have decided against making grandiose plans for Twilight but oh no, the perverted side of me said that "oh if she can complete this task she'll be even better in bed" and I just had to listen to it! I'm starting to feel dumber and dumber as this episode progresses.

Well Twilight tells Fluttershy that SHE has to be the one to keep those beasts from feasting on Rainbow. Well at first she can't but suddenly she starts getting through to them and before long Rainbow doesn't have to worry about being put in a stew. Now is the time to see if little miss hot shit discovers if she was right or not. She puts Fluttershy's necklace on her and she is transformed back to herself! Yay! At least I know she'll still have her sex appeal and be able to perform!

Well here comes yet another song. This episode has been more song than anything else but at least they're tying them in with the story line. So now the time has come for Twilight to fix everypony else. She convinces Rainbow to give cloud busting a chance and she discovers she is still good at it. Twilight puts her necklace on her and the element of loyalty has been restored. Good, now she can go fix the rest of them and when the next threat arises, Equestria won't be screwed. Once she fixes everypony, their wonderful magical number ends with a midair hug. Now how they managed that I'm not sure but all that matters is that for the first time in her life, Twilight fixed a mess she created on her own rather than expecting me to do it for her.

She is so close to finally doing what she needs to do for me to go through with my plans. She hears a voice in her head and leads her friends to the library. Well here she goes grabbing Starswirl's book and getting ready to write the revised spell in it. She writes, From all of us together, together we're friends. With the marks of our destinies made one, there is magic without end!"

With that the elements start acting very strangely and now here she is encircled in energy. Very soon I finally get my part. Well Twilight looks as though she was incinerated, leaving a burn mark in the shape of her cutie mark. You killed Twilight, you bitches!

Alright, they didn't kill Twilight but she finds herself in a realm of just stars and darkness. Now I have decided to pay her a visit. I have decided that she has done a sufficient amount of things to finally be worthy of what I have planned for her. I approach her and plaster all sorts of images from her life around us, and I will admit, despite her fouling up quite a bit I am proud of her. Anypony that can put up with my bitchiness and satisfy me as much as she has deserves this. Now comes the best part, another song....but this one is sang by me, the pony with the absolute sexiest voice ever.

"You've come such a long, long way

And I've watched you from that very first day

To see how you might grow

To see what you might do

To see what you've been through

And all the ways you've made me proud of you

It's time now for a new change to come

You've grown up and your new life has begun

To go where you will go

To see what you will see

To find what you will be

For it's time for you to fulfill your destiny"

Well now the time has come to do what I had planned since she let Spike take the crystal heart to Cadence. She became encircled in energy and suddenly she has transformed. This transformation will not be revealed until I make sure she is ready so before she is allowed to return home, we have some fun in that dark realm and my oh my, she is absolutely spectacular now! Now the time has come for her to return to Ponyville.

It is obvious it took me a while because it is now dark in Ponyville as she returns. I could read her friends' minds when they saw that dark pink star coming towards them. They were nervous but once Twilight landed, she spread her wings and looked magnificent. One thing Rainbow needs to realize that before she deems Twilight a new flying buddy, she needs to learn how to use those wings first.

Fluttershy is quite observant, yes Twilight looks like a princess now because she IS a princess now! Luna opposed this for quite some time until Twilight showed she wasn't selfish when it came to saving the Crystal Empire. After that, Luna was on board. Now I must dip into the treasury to give Twilight the coronation that she deserves....well that along with some regalia for myself and my sister that will match this occasion.

Now the coronation begins. Look closely at me and my sister. We have special regalia for this. My sister claimed she would look better in silver rather than gold and after seeing this, I should have had her's made silver, but oh no, I DIDN'T LISTEN! I had to make it gold! But look at my regalia. You see that huge crown! It says, "That's right bitches, your Sexy Sun Goddess is the best pony out there and don't you forget it! Bow down before me or meet you doom!"

I finally feel like a true champion as for the first time one of my students has deemed herself worthy of being a princess, so happy that I even allowed another song to be sung despite this episode being done mostly in song. While Twilight looked sexy all sopping wet, she looked even better with those curls in her mane! Let's just say that I had further plans for her and tonight those plans are going to come true!

Although I know Twilight wanted to go to my chambers immediately and let Cadence and I initiate her into the royal system, first she had to give a speech. Yeah it was boring and shit but after that she decides to go prancing through the streets singing what would thankfully be the last song of the show. She again goes singing about how everything is certainly going to be fine. I sure hope the hell so, Cadence and I have plans for her tonight and we can't have anything go awry.

Oh and just so you know, according to Spitfire, the seven songs in this episode is an academy record. Now be gone you commoners, Cadence, Twilight and I have sexy times ahead. Yeah I know it's wrong to be getting it on with my niece but hey, I'm not rigid and straight laced like Luna. This initiation requires that Cadence and I do this with her together. As far as Luna goes, I'll let her do my duties but I will NOT let her handle anything involving foreign relations.