Hello everypony, it is you beloved dictator Celestia and since none of you have led any protests over my new laws so I have decided to share with you my synopsis of "Sonic Rainboom."

Another lovely day has arrived down in Ponyville and there is my oh so sexy Fluttershy doing something with Rainbow Crash. What I would like to know is why is she spending any time with her? It's not like anything she would ever do would be worthwhile to start with. Ok, Rainbow is practicing some dumb routine for the young flyers competition and Fluttershy is basically there for moral support, cheering her on. What's that Crashie? You are upset because she is saying "yay" instead of going completely nuts over you? Go and find Scootaloo, I'm sure she'll give you the adoration you certainly don't need.

Alright, now she's working on her routine. I am watching this and I can't help but think BORING! Nothing she is doing is worth my time but hey, I promised all of you I would give you my synopsis of this so I'll endure her lackluster antics and keep on watching. The weaving between the trees and making the clouds spin is nothing special. Hell I'm betting that any pegasus that can fly could do that but get this. Little miss bitch has decided that she is going to try and do a sonic rainboom. Yeah Crash, I'm real sure you'll be able to do it, NOT! Now I wait for her to grind to a stand still and for the bow shock to throw her Faust only knows how far away.

Enough with Crashie, Twilight, Pinkie and Rarity are in the library doing something. Luckily for me I can see through that window and luckily they aren't filming a porno because I would be angry if Twilight put herself out on film like that. You know how embarrassing it would be if everypony learned that one of MY students, especially my protege, was training to be a porn star? It could really damage my reputation. It might damage it so much that parents may not want to send their fillies to my school anymore! They might see if Luna would educate them instead and that would not be a good thing.

For what they are doing, they are re-shelving books. Wow, I'm shocked that my Twily would allow anypony to assist her in that. Now for the funny thing, just as those three finished getting that tedious task done, Rainbow comes crashing in through that window and the library is a mess, again. Poor little Twily, she is so distraught now! You know what that means, it means that I'll have to go down there tonight and make her feel all better! Thank you Rainbow, I was getting a bit needy anyway.

Now to make things even better, Fluttershy has landed in the window sill to see if Crash is ok. Woo-hoo, I always love staring at her sexy flank! Alright, so now they all know that Rainbow is practicing doing a sonic rainboom for this competition and Pinkie is acting like it is all that and then some. Oh Pinkie, she thinks she's never seen a rainboom before. I don't want to give away too much of what might happen in a later episode but I have a feeling she may be mistaken here.

Oh yes, and despite fucking up royally, Rainbow is bragging about how she is the best flyer to ever come out of Cloudsdale and is claiming that she could do those rainbooms in her sleep. Bullshit bitch, you couldn't even do one while you were wide awake! Just admit it to your friends that you are a mediocre flyer at best and that your arrogance is how you keep yourself from falling into a deep depression. Had I not had a cake being delivered to me, I would have flew down there, smacked Rainbow, told her she is a fucking idiot and then hauled Fluttershy and Twilight up here and had some fun.

Well now Rainbow has flown home to hoof herself while Fluttershy is telling her friends that Rainbow is an arrogant, conceited bitch who can't fly worth shit and should just give this up. (Well in the unedited version anyway) Now Fluttershy has left and of course you all know the animators can't show were she went to! If you guessed she came up to join me for some cake in my sleeping chambers, you are right. We had cake and then we had each other for dessert!

Yes I'm having fun but I also can't help but wonder why the hell Rarity suddenly wants to get in Rainbow's coat. She is demanding that my Twily find a spell to get them into Cloudsdale. I really didn't think Rarity was into racing but I guess even I learn new things every now and then. Well Twilight decides to cast a spell on Rarity to give her wings and it works. That is all good for her but ugh, those wings are hideous. I thought that Twilight would be gifted enough to give her real wings that would be permanent. I didn't know that she only had enough ability to give her fake ass, temporary wings. Hell I'm betting that even Trixie could pull that off.

I'm going to let you in on something, while it looked like everypony headed up to Cloudsdale immediately, it wasn't until the following morning. After all, Fluttershy did not just have a quickie since she flew up to Cloudsdale with Rainbow. Now for what really pisses me off, the moment they get up there, three undesirables wind up approaching them and making fun of the least favorite of Twilight's friends. Hey, I don't particularly care for Rainbow but I certainly do not like bullies. Those three have been on my shit list since they were colts and I'm hoping they'll do something one day that would warrant a public execution! For now though, I must resist my urge to kill.

Now Rarity has arrived with those fake wings of hers. Look at her, acting like she is hot shit and all that. Ugh, I know I enjoy dragging her into my sleeping chambers sometimes but I certainly will not do that as long as she has those grotesque wings. I would think she would consider it a crime against fashion but since she can fly now, she loves them. They may not be a crime against fashion but they are an insult to real wings everywhere, especially mine.

Now Twilight is a smart pony as you all know but another thing troubles me, she is lazy. Yep you heard me, lazy. Get this, doing that wing spell on Rarity was so hard on the poor thing that for the rest of her friends and herself, she just cast an easier spell that would allow them to walk on clouds. She is pathetic, truly pathetic. That isn't a matter of a spell being too difficult, it is a matter of her being a lazy bum. Hell I wonder if that is any indication of how she is going to be in the bedroom tonight? You know what, screw it! I'll just have a solo session with Fluttershy.

Now that they have arrived and thanks to Twilight's spell, the non-pegasi can walk on clouds. Wouldn't you know it, the second Rarity gets there she starts being an attention whore, well worse than she already is. A very carefully placed mirror has drawn her attention and of course she can't stop adoring herself and her new wings. Get over yourself Rarity, I know you think you're hot but even among your circle of friends, you only rank third. Oh well, it ain't only her who is in love with her wings, the construction pegasi seem to think they are wonderful too. I don't care what they think though because it doesn't affect me any.

Now my sexy Fluttershy and her ugly, narcissistic friend have decided to give everypony a tour of Cloudsdale. I can understand why they'd find it fascinating given that this will likely be their only chance to look around but still, I think Twily will still find my bed more entertaining. Regarding Applejack though, since she is a farmer I can see why she would be interested. Oh and memo to Pinkie Pie: Rainbows are not exactly meant to be consumed. I tried one once and yuck! After that I decided I would never try tasting things from the weather factory ever again.

I swear, those Cloudsdale ponies must be idiots. It seems like everywhere Rarity goes, everypony can't stop looking at her wings. Even those undesirables are impressed with them. I have a suggestion, since they love Rarity's wings so much that even one of them wants a pair, maybe I should make that desire come true. What I would do is cut their wings off, find a spell to give them permanent fake wings and they can fly around like delicate flowers from now on. I'm sure then those bullies would be bullied by the REAL pegasi and guess what, I would turn the other cheek and laugh.

Oh great, somepony has suggested that Rarity enter the competition and that is exactly what she does. You know something, I honestly thought Rarity wanted to get Rainbow in bed the way she wanted to attend this event but now she is in it for her own selfish desires. What a bitch! Hey I'm not a fan of Rainbow but I actually feel bad for her. I'm pretty sure with Rarity in the competition, her wings will impress the judges so much that she'll likely win.

Speaking of the judges, guess who they are, the Wonderbolts. So now Rainbow is all giddy that her heroes are going to be determining the winner of this. Soon though her joy of trying to impress her heroes becomes extreme paranoia over Rarity and her wings. She gets so nervous that she even starts switching numbers so that she won't have to go out there right away. Guess what Crashie, you'll have to go out there eventually. Speaking of switching positions, Rarity has decided to let other ponies go ahead of her so that she can make herself look perfect. Let me guess, she's going to go out there with her face caked in makeup and be donning some very slutty outfit.

Finally it is performance time and here comes Rainbow, nervous as hell and here comes Rarity. Ugh, gag me with a spoon! She may not be in a slutty outfit but her face is downright repulsive. I have never seen anything uglier in my life! A little mascara is ok but tons of it, lipstick and doubling the false eyelashes is going way too far. I don't know how long I'll have that awful image stuck in my head. There are some things in this world that simply can not be unseen, and this is one of them.

To make matters worse, Rarity has changed the music and it is horrid. Well the performances start and just as expected, Rainbow is making mistakes and Rarity is up there acting like a damn figure skater, doing all these fancy moves and acting like it is the best thing in the world. Personally I'm not impressed. If I were the judge I would just yawn and decide that she isn't worthy of even being considered.

Now comes Rarity's ultimate attention whore moment. She flies up in front of the sun, spreads her wings and basks the city in multi-colored sunlight. I'll admit it is pretty but it still isn't enough to make me go all fangirl over her. What's that? Her wings have incinerated and now she is plunging. Shit, if she falls and goes splat, I'll need to find a new generous unicorn. Maybe Twinkleshine can have her job, she is quite generous, well in my sleeping chambers anyway.

Well it looks like the Wonderbolts are going to be more than judges, they are going to be lifesavers, well that was the case until Rarity kicks them unconscious. Hell, now I might have to replace not only the element of generosity, but replace three Wonderbolts. Rainbow hears Rarity screaming and despite her being a total attention whore, Rainbow goes to save her ass.

I'm going to be honest, I didn't think Rainbow would reach them in time and there would be four fatalities that day. But I would be surprised when everypony's favorite little narcissist broke the sound barrier. Not only did she create a sonic rainboom, but she also saved her friend and her heroes. Good, now I won't have to worry about perhaps putting a pony in as the element of generosity who may not be up for the challenge. After all, simply being generous and submissive in the bedroom doesn't exactly make a pony element bearer material.

Now the time has come for Rarity to eat crow. There she is, sitting in that balloon basket, telling everypony she's sorry for being an attention whore and telling Rainbow how great she is. It is good to see her humbling her self like this, not to mention being out of that outfit and having her face clean. Ugh, I seriously think that next time makeup should be banned from this competition. You may think that would be an unnecessary ban but damn it, ponies need to look presentable! Makeup and hideous shit like that may be ok for boring events like the Gala but when it comes to athletic events, it is uncouth!

Now since the Wonderbolts were kicked unconscious, they now have no memory of the event so somepony else had to be the one who decided would win, and naturally that pony is ME! I will admit, I wanted to give Derpy the win since she was the one who did ten barrel rolls in a row but there is something they didn't show. Twilight promised me that if I would give Rainbow the win, that she would allow me to be extra rough with her that night so I caved in.

Oh boy, now the bullies have shown up and are suddenly wanting to eat Rainbow's pussy along with wanting her to show them how she pulled that sonic rainboom off. Sorry boys but Rainbow only likes mares and besides, why would she want anything to do with bastards such as you to start with?

Now the Wonderbolts have shown up and of course Rainbow is going all fanfilly. She is ecstatic that she gets to spend the whole day with them! I'll let you in on something, there is only one Wonderbolt she cared to spend much time with and that was Spitfire. Yeah I'm not sure if she is going to want to take Rainbow into her bedroom given that she is relatively young compared to her, but who knows. Rainbow might be pleasantly surprised or she might be devastated if Spitfire turns her down.

Now for what happened after the show. As you all know I told Twilight that I would give Rainbow the title of "best young flyer" if she would let me be rough with her that night. That is not what happened. Remember how I said that I wasn't going to give Twilight any action over her laziness when it came to those spells? Well I held true to that so the only one I took home with me was Fluttershy. Yeah Twilight wasn't happy that she wouldn't get to be with me but oh well. I'm sure her and Rarity can go at it tonight and have plenty of fun!

Now if you serfs will excuse me, I have a lovely yellow pegasus waiting for me. She is standing by my bed with a disapproving look on her face trying to persuade me to shut up and join her. I better hurry up or she will punish me severely and I certainly don't want that!