I groan as my eyes adjust to the light pouring through the window of the loft. Slowly, the blurred shapes around me turn to recognizable objects, and it isn't long until my vision fully returns to me.

I hear a light snoring to my left echoing my groan. Oh, don’t tell me…

Yup. Pinkie’s still here. Attached to my arm. Asleep.

At first it was cute and all. You know, a little pink puffball giving your arm a big ol’ hug seems like a pretty sweet deal, at least to me. But Pinkie snores. Its fine when we’re about ten feet apart from each other on separate beds, but up close and personal, it’s real noticeable. Adorable, but noticeable. And distracting. What I’m trying to say is that Pinkie kept me up all night. But that’s not even the worst part, no, here’s the worst part:

I have absolutely no idea how to get her off of me.

Well…no idea past just straight up decking her in the face, but I can’t do that. Then I’d regret it and she’d run off crying and I’d feel like a dick and go begging for forgiveness and get guilt-tripped into giving her a tummy rub and…and…

…and this sounds oddly familiar.

Just as that thought crosses my mind, I hear someone ascending the stairs. And the first thing they’d see would be me snuggling with Pinkie…

Shit!

I try to get up again, but Pinkie mumbles something under her breath and pulls me back down, causing my body to jostle against the bed.

Okay, don’t panic, don’t panic. Just, um…uh…play dead! They can’t kill me if I’m dead! But then it would look like Pinkie is with a dead body…granted, Pinkie IS a strange pony, but-

“Pinkie?” I hear the familiar drone of Maud’s voice call up the stairs. “Is that you?”

Agh! Um, okay Hunter, just calm down. Calm down, its fine. I’m sure Maud walking in on a monkey man and her sister in a bed together won’t result in anybody flipping their lid.

Just, uh, act natural! Don’t act like anything is weird, just play it cool. Yeah, I can play it cool. I’m cool.

Maud finally reaches the top of the staircase, and her appearance surprises me a bit. The first time I saw her, she was clean and was wearing a frock. This time, she had forgone the frock, instead wearing a hardhat with a headlamp attachment. Although I still couldn't see her cutie mark; it was made indistinguishable under all of the dirt and dust that covered Maud from ear tip to fetlock.

“Pinkie, where-“Maud stopped in her tracks when she looked at Pinkie’s bed. Her face showed no surprise, no anger, no confusion, no emotion. It was unnerving to say the least.

She just stared at me and Pinkie, unblinking, immobile.

“Um…” I said, totally cool like and smooth. “Sup?”

“Hi.” Maud said. She then proceeded to take off the hardhat, cross the room, and enter the bathroom, shutting the door behind her.

…Now I don’t know about you, but I’ll take a ‘hi’ over a ‘what the hell are you doing with my sister, I’m going to rip out your trachea’ any day of the week. But her lack of a reaction…well…I guess shouldn't really surprise me, considering how she’s acted before this point. Still, it’s a little unsettling.

I hear the shower running. Welp, Maud is indisposed. That’s one problem down. No defensive sister taking something the wrong way and trying to kill me today. Not that it’s ever happened to me before, but, I digress. Still stuck with Pinkie firmly attached to my arm, snoring and occasionally mumbling something odd.

“Zzzz…” Pinkie hums into my arm. “Chocolate vanilla swirl with cookie crunch, please…skkKKK…zzzzz…”

I can’t help but smile at her sleep talking. Wait, is that drool? She’s drooling on me, isn’t she? Nope, nope nope nope nope nope, soooooo much nope!

“Hey, Maud?” I call out towards the bathroom. Yeah, I know it’s rude to yell for someone when they’re in the sanctity of a bathroom, but I’m dealing with a crisis here!

There’s a palpable moment of silence before Maud responds.

“Yes?” Her blank voice shouts back, the increased volume of the outcry not effecting her lack of emotion in the least.

“When you finish up in there, can you get your sister off of me?” I call back. You know, it just registered in my mind that sentence would sound really strange out of context.

“Okay. I’ll be finished in a minute.” Maud deadpans.

Alright, good. Earth ponies are significantly stronger than humans…well, human. Me, I’m talking about me. Yeah, it’s a bit embarrassing that pastel ponies can bench more than me, but from what I've seen, it’s more specific to the earth ponies than any other race. I highly doubt that Flutters or Sparklebutt could beat me in arm wrestling…mostly because I’m the only one with fingers, but whatever. Okay, right, the point: Maud has a much higher chance of getting me out of Pinkie’s vice grip than I do. Good thing too. I don’t think it’s healthy for your arm to be asleep for over twelve hours.  

I notice the absence of running water, indicating that Maud is done with her shower. The bathroom door opens, and Maud steps out with a towel on her head and around her barrel. This reveals her cutie mark, which is a rock.

I’m not sure what I was expecting.

“Could you give me a hoof with this?” I say, gesturing to Pinkie. Hey, I didn't trip up on saying hoof! I think I’m starting to get the whole, ‘hoof/hand’ thing down. Only took five weeks.

“What were you doing?” Maud asks blandly. Oh boy.  

“Nothing!” I say hurriedly, waving my free hand. “She fell asleep at the counter, and I, uh, I carried her up to bed. When I tried to leave, she grabbed onto my arm, and, well…yeah.”

“She used to do that to me when we were kids.” Maud says after a short silence. “She’d start hugging me and fall asleep after a while.” There was a pause. “I know how to get her off.”

“Great!” I said thankfully. Maud didn't move. “Well…?”

She just stood there, looking at me with blank eyes.

“Aren't you going to help me?” I asked finished, confused.  

Maud walks over to the bed and lightly tosses her towels to the side, freeing her mane. Out of instinct, I look away when the towel comes off of her barrel, but quickly realize that I’m being ridiculous.

“Pinkie told me that you’re a good masseur.” Maud stated.

“…And?”

“Give me a massage.”

…Well that was blunt. I look back at her to see that she’s still wearing the same blank expression. We’re both silent for a moment, just looking at each other.

“…Come again?” I ask, hoping I just heard her wro-

“Give me a massage.” Maud repeats. Okay, never mind. I’m justified one freak out. Ahem,

AGGGGGGGGHHHHH WHY ME!? WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME, LORD?!!

I mentally slap myself. Gotta remain calm. Stay calm. Just breathe. Breathe, that’ll make you calm.

…Okay, I’m good. But I also have no idea what to do. On one hand, Pinkie doesn't seem like she’s going to wake up any time soon, considering all the work she got done yesterday, so getting her off of me for the price of a tummy rub doesn't seem too bad.

On the other hand, however…

It’s Maud. We barely know each other, and you don’t just give a massage to somebody you don’t know well…says the person who was paid to massage strangers. Uh, okay, let me remedy that statement. At that point in time, it was a profession. I didn't really want to do it, but I needed to if I wanted to make ends meet. But right now…okay, I don’t know what it is right now. I guess it’s just something I do with Pinkie, and that’s because she’s my best friend. And also because I still feel a little bad for screaming at her, but that guilt is starting to fade with time. I don’t know Maud. We've talked a total of two times, including right now. Plus she’s Pinkie’s sister, and I don’t know how that makes me feel, especially because I still don’t know what these tummy rubs mean to the ponies, or how it makes them feel. From Pinkie’s reactions, it’s a bit hard to determine whether they find it pleasurable in…that way or not.

But back on that first hand, Pinkie’s drool is starting to leak through my shirt.  

Giving the massage is looking pretty good right about now.

“Um, okay.” I say cautiously. “And by that do you mean a tummy rub, or…?” She stared. “I mean, that’s what I gave Pinkie, so…”

“Sure.”

“Okay, cool, but, ah…” I looked down at Pinkie, who still has a death hold on my right arm in such a way that her foreleg hook around halfway up my arm with her muzzle resting on my shoulder. Ponies have big ass heads. Not really relevant, just an observation.

“How exactly are we gonna do this, all things considered?” I finish.

“What are we considering?” Maud asks, ever so slightly raising her brow. To make my point, I attempt to sit up, but am quickly pulled back down by Pinkie. Maud doesn't speak. She simply climbs up onto the bed on my left side. I can’t sit up, so it’s impossible to fully see her without tilting my head up. I do so, and see her crawl on top of me and slowly roll herself onto her back, her head perched on Pinkie’s side and her back hooves dangling onto the bed.

I lean my head back down and contemplate: should I tell her not to be weird about it, like I told Pinkie? From what I've learned, the ponies have absolutely no idea what that means, so it’s not like it’s going to help. And besides, this is Maud we’re talking about. It’s not like she’s secretly some sex-craved maniac who will react extremely violently to the tummy rub, putting me in a humorously awkward situation.

That’d just be silly. And terrifying. Mostly terrifying. Only terrifying.

I place my left hand on her stomach, getting a feel for it. Her fur has a bit of a surprising texture. It’s very sleek, unlike her sister’s plush fur, and mats to her body from her shower. Her stomach is also far more toned. While Pinkie’s stomach was a bit pudgy, yet not disagreeably so, Maud’s is much more taut and tough.  

I can’t exactly see her from my position, so I kind of have to massage her blind. I can feel the slow rise and fall of her chest, indicating her controlled breathes. She’s a lot calmer about this than I am, but what’s to be expected? This is pretty uncomfortable, at least for me, and not just because I’m practically pinned to the bed.

I begin the massage, lightly pulling my fingers through her fur as my fingers delicately pressed against her body. Surprisingly, I don’t hear Maud saying anything. My curiosity peaks, and I lean my head up.

…Well…it’s not as bad as I thought it would be. Granted, she looks creepy as hell. Her head is on its side on Pinkie’s body, and she’s looking right at me, her face as empty of emotion as ever.

But her eyes…

I lean my head back down, perturbed by what I saw. I both love and can’t stand the eyes of the Pie sisters. Large, bright blue, sparkling with life…it hurts to look at something that looks so much like her eyes. It hurts to be reminded of-

“Hunter.”

“Hm?” I mumble, pulling myself out of my ruminations. I tilt by head back up and look at Maud, but avoid looking at her eyes.  

“You stopped.”

I look down to my hand, which is idly resting on her stomach. Oops.  

“Oh, um, sorry.” I say awkwardly, returning to the massage with a quick stroke of my hand. After a few minutes of gently massaging Maud’s stomach, I begin to feel a bit uneasy at her quietness. I mean, yeah, I don’t want her to pull a Sparklebutt on me, or say anything like Pinks did. Seriously, I need some mind bleach for when she said ‘you’re really good at this’. But Maud is just lying there, taking the massage with no response at all.

…I can’t help but feel a bit inadequate.

“Maud?” I ask hesitantly.

“What?” She replies, not curtly but concisely.

“How does this feel?” I inquire. I want to make sure that she enjoys this, but she isn't really making it clear to me.

“It feels like you’re massaging my stomach.”

Yep, that really clears things up. Good talk, Maud. Maybe later we can go swimming. Then you can tell me that you feel wet. Wait, no, that’s just an analogy, don’t think of it like that!

“…Okayyy…” I say slowly, bothered by her unspecific answer, then return to the massage.  

I start to dig my hands a bit more roughly into her stomach. Some of my customers back home needed a lot more than what I was giving to have any kind of response to my work. Maybe Maud was too tough for gentle caresses.

Apparently that isn't it, because I’m doing my best right now and she isn't reacting at all. I glance up before laying my head back down again at the sight of her face, completely void of pleasure. Am I a bad masseur? Maybe Pinks and Sparklebutt are just special cases. Am I not trying hard enough? I’m doing my best right now and she isn’t even moving! What does a masseur have to do to get a response around here?!

“Hunter.” Maud says again.

“Yes?” I ask, not bothering to look up, put out at my apparent inequity.

“What are you doing? I thought this was a stomach only massage.” Huh?

I leaned my head up and my breathe catches in my throat when I see that my hand had moved to the back of her ear, and was unconsciously scratching it.  

ABORT! ABORT!

I pulled my arm back and felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment. I guess I was just trying to make sure that she enjoyed the massage, and resorted to ear scratching. She wasn't exactly keeping me in the know to whether or not it felt good, and it was my job as a masseur to make sure that it did. Wait, no, I’m not a masseur, I’m a pastry chef! Ugh! Occupations!

“Sorry, sorry!” I said quickly, returning my hand to her stomach. “It’s just, um, well...” I huffed out a frustrated breathe before continuing. “Maud, are you enjoying the stomach massage or not?” Ha, find an unspecific answer to that, you emotionless tiny horse!

“It’s enjoyable.” Maud stated. Ha, victory! “But I want do so something else.” What?

“Um…sure.” I agreed, putting my hand back down to my side. “What do you wanna do?”

“I want to talk about you and Pinkie.” She says flatly.

“…Oh.” I said quietly.

I've been waiting for this conversation. The, ‘stay away from my sister you big monkey monster thing’ talk. I know I take a lot of shit from these ponies, but I’m drawing a line if Maud tries to separate me and my best friend.

“I think-“Maud began.

“Maud, before you say anything, I need to get something off my chest.” I say, cutting her off.  Maud doesn't respond, urging me to continue.

“I know that I’m…different. I know what I look like to you. I know that I’m five foot ten, I know that I have sharp teeth, and I know that I have…these.” I lift up my left hand before placing it back onto her stomach. “But I need you to know something.” Here we go...

“Your sister is the most amazing individual that I know. She’s sweet, and funny, and talented, but most of all…” I pause, collecting my thoughts. “But most of all, she’s caring. She’s the most caring person…er, pony, that I've ever met. All she wants to do is to make others happy, and I can’t tell you how much I respect that.”

I contemplate for a moment before I continue. I set my head back down and stare at the ceiling.

“Before I…before I came to Equestria, I didn't have too much to be happy about” I said softly. “Your sister showed me that there was more to life than what I knew.”

My thoughts go back to her, but I push them aside and raise my head, looking Maud straight in the blue irises that brought me so much pain and joy.

“She taught me how to laugh again.” I summed up, letting out a sad chuckle. “I don’t care what I am. I don’t care if I’m a human, or a pony, or anything in between. The only thing I care about is making your sister as happy as she makes me.” I smile at the thought of achieving that goal.

We lay there quietly, the only sound breaking the silence being Pinkie’s snores. After a few painful seconds waiting for Maud’s response, I get one in the form of something that I never thought would appear on her visage: a smile. The left side of her lip just slightly tips upwards, making an extremely weak half smile, but a smile none the less.

“I think you already have.”

…What? Wait…wait, what?  

“Excuse me?” I ask incredulously.

“Pinkie Pie acts differently around you than with any of the ponies in Ponyville.” Maud said, the tinniest bit of emotion creeping into her voice. “She’s more wary with them, more insecure.”

“That doesn't sound like Pinkie at all to me.” I interrupt. I've never seen her act insecure.

“I've known her for her whole life.” Maud says. “You’d pick up on it too. She’s always just a little bit afraid that she’ll lose her friends, that she’ll do something to push them away. I don’t think she sees you as a friend.”

“Than what does she see me as?” I ask, confused. Maud looks me dead in the eye before continuing.

“A big brother.”

Abigbrotherabigbrotherabigbrotherabigbrotherabigbrotherabigbrother…

My hand clamps over my mouth and my eyes grow wide before I feel the stinging of tears. I see a memory flash before my eyes.

A lock of blonde hair. A face of fair skin.

A wide smile. The sound of a small girl laughing.

Big, blue, sparkling eyes.

My hand falls from my face and rests on my chest. Tears flow freely from my eyes, my emotions from Maud’s claim unrivaled in their strength. It might not be true, it could just be Maud speculating, but, I, I just…it needs to be true. I need it to be true.

Maud’s face takes on another form: concern. It’s almost unnoticeable, but it’s there.

“Hunter, are you okay?” She asks.

“A-A big b-brother?” I ask shakily, ignoring her question. “You r-really think so? You’re s-sure?”

“Positive.” Maud says with one hundred percent honesty. “She treats you like she treats me and our sisters. I don’t know why, but she sees you as family.”

Family. I look down at Pinkie, no longer caring about her snores or her drool. All I see is a little girl, clinging to her brother’s arm like she’ll just float away if she lets go. Innocent, pure, perfect.

I let out a shuddering breath, trying to fight back heavy sobs. My arm reaches out, lightly holding the side of Maud’s head. My thumb gently rubs her check.

“Th-thank you.” I say through my tears. “You don’t k-know how much th-that means to me.” Maud gives me an uncertain smile, which turns almost imperceptibly into a genuine one. I pull my arm back and wipe my tears from my eyes.

“I’ll wake up Pinkie.” Maud says, rolling over and hopping off the bed. She walks around and lifts a hoof to her sister.

“W-Wait!” I cry out. Maud looks back at me, a question in her eyes.

“Just…just leave her like this.” I say quietly. “I-I don’t think I mind it anymore.”

Maud gives me another microscopic smile before exiting the room, descending down the stairs. I look back at Pinkie. A solid puddle of drool has formed on my shoulder, and has leaked through onto my skin. Her mumbles have become incoherent. Her snores are louder than they had ever been.

And I might have a little sister again.  

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