The day was hot, the clouds hanging high in the sky drifting lazily about as if they hadn't a care in the world. The Earth below them felt a dawning hint of rainfall thanks to the mass of vapor in the air, and the furry occupants prepared for it, heading to their respective homes to protect themselves from the coming downfall.

But there was one resident who was not.

There was one who continued onward, unafraid of the rain.

His vehicle sped through the land, kicking up dust and dirt in its wake as it rocked back and forth from the uneven ground.

Its red paint shimmered in the sun, gleaming as if the car itself was considered holy. And, seeing as who he was, it might as well have been. The roar of the engine soothed him, and he swore he could just spend his life travelling along aimlessly.

But, he was not doing so. He had a mission to do. He had something to find.

He wasn't afraid of the rain; he had seen a lot worse in his time here.

Thinking about the weather, his jaw went slack and he clenched it, adjusting his grip on the steering wheel. Narrowing his eyes, he looked up, hummed, and fixed his rear-view mirror to face the area behind him. Seeing the two vehicles, he stared back forward at the road ahead of him. He could deal with the duo easily. Piece of cake.

His Comet kept its speed, rocketing across the field with enough burnt rubber to make a tire hoarder gasp in shock. Gritting his teeth, he took a small jump, the front end of the sports car dipping before the wheels met the ground as well, causing the occupant inside to groan at the motion. Looking ahead, he saw that the road continued with no obstacles in his path. Thinking, he nodded to nobody but himself and craned his neck, looking in the side-view mirror to his left.

Two super cars kept chase, their black paint jobs reflecting the sun and the dead area around them. An impressive job, he had to admit, if the colors weren't so basic and edgy. The one he worked out to be on the left was of red and black, with the other being green and black. The car model? He had dealt with them. A lot of them.

Zentorno's.

He adjusted his grip yet again, wondering exactly how to deal with them in the coolest way possible.

He thought, sat, and lessened his push on the gas pedal, slowing down just gradually enough to make it seem like the super cars were speeding up and gaining on him. He could just imagine them laughing to each other that they'd be able to finally take the one and only legend down.

He licked his lips subconsciously.

No one could take the legend down.

Looking to his left, he watched the red and black Zentorno reach his back bumper. Not seeing the other car, he realized it was on his right side.

He chuckled.

Bastards were trying to pull a Mad Max on him.

Narrowing his eyes, he looked to the east and west, and saw the Zentorno's pull up alongside him, their black windows covering up any way of seeing the drivers inside, dust covering the cars' bodies, credited to the location of their pursuit. He stared forward, anticipating what they would do next, with many minutes passing as the three traveled down the road, the only sound being of the aggressive engines housed inside their vehicles.

He tensed.

And suddenly, two very synchronized songs played out, shattering his ear drums and annoying him beyond all fucking belief, courtesy of the Zentorno's horns next to him on both sides.

Gritting his teeth, his eyes narrowed to very dangerous levels. That was the last fucking straw.

He reached toward his crotch, fishing for what he needed. Giving a grin, he pulled it out and rolled his windows up, hoping they wouldn't notice what he was about to do. Chuckling, he lightly tossed the object and looked for the primer. Finding it, he pressed it quickly and hummed, settling it back down on his lap. Reaching toward the dashboard, he retrieved the small black lighter and brought it toward his face. Swiftly, he lit it, raising it to his lips and setting the large cigar ablaze.

Puffing, he gave a shit-eating grin, grabbed the object in his lap, and felt for the window. He nodded, held in all his strength, and promptly shoved his arm into the window, shattering it and sending the bits and pieces into the sand, only for it to disappear into the sand and dust kicking up behind them. Looking at the red and black Zentorno, he raised his arm outside, showing the driver his prize. The driver seemed to notice it, the engine beginning to falter as he fumbled for the brake.

He was having none of that, and with a single toss, chucked the sticky bomb a foot away and stuck it onto the right door of the Zentorno. Moving back fully into his Comet, he gripped the steering wheel, pushed down onto the gas pedal, and veered left, slamming into the front tire with his back right, effectively sending the super car spinning. He grinned, knowing that the car had now been left in the dust, and pressed the detonator, hearing the explosion now several yards away.

Done with one, he looked to his right, expecting the driver to still be driving alongside him.

He was doing just that, as expected, but he wasn't doing just that.

A leather jacket-clad arm was reaching out, the occupant inside giving him a demonic glare as he aimed a sawed-off shotgun at him. He knew what was about to come, and ducked as the shells exploded his right window, missing him by a hair. Getting up, he let go of the gas pedal, slowed down, and shoved his weight back into it, turning right to tail the black and green Zentorno.

Leaning every which way, he looked for an opening: something he could manipulate to take the super car down. He knew full well that the back was completely impenetrable thanks to the lack of a rear window, and there was no way to take the driver out from behind. Seeing none, save for a black and yellow license plate that read SWAG420 and a Batman-like spoiler protruding from the rear end, he licked his lips and hummed, maintaining his grip on the wheel as he reached toward his crotch, looking for another sticky bomb.

He frowned as he found none, and let his arm fall limp on the seat, sighing.

The Zentorno honked yet again, a loud rendition of a sad trombone piercing his eardrums. Gritting his teeth, he shook his head, attempting to dispel the horrible sound. Growling, he suddenly had an idea.

His Comet veered left as he began to gain on the Zentorno. Pulling up alongside it, he watched as the driver gave him a rather rude gesture. Laughing, he puffed on the cigar, eyeing the super car up like a car enthusiast obsessed with its build. His eyes landed on the rear left tire. He hummed, wondering how inept the driver was and if what he was about to do would actually work. Letting out a huge breath, he decided to go for it.

People like this wouldn't be all too smart anyhow.

Tapping the steering wheel, he hummed yet again, stayed his path, and reached for his crotch, finding his AP pistol. Keeping it out of his opponent's eyesight, he threw his weight into the wheel, shooting it to the right and into the Zentorno's side. The black and green car swerved slightly, caught by surprise by the offensive act, almost tumbling off the road before it began its own attack.

This was exactly what he wanted.

The Zentorno came fast, expecting to toss his poor little Comet around like a tinker toy in the dust.

Instead, the Comet slowed down just so slightly, and an AP pistol poked out of the right window. For a brief split-second, it aimed, and finally fired a volley into the rear left tire. The tire exploded in a shower of sparks and fumes, and the Zentorno began to spin out of control. Thinking quickly, he tossed the automatic pistol into the passenger seat and reached toward his privates again. Grinning ear-to-ear, he brought out his next weapon, the world suddenly slowing down around him.

The Zentorno, now twirling on its front wheels, slid in front of him in the beginning of a circular motion, the front bumpers of the two cars barely missing each other by mere inches. Ahead of him, the Zentorno's driver gave him a surprised look, eyes wide with shock and fright. Puffing out a swirl of smoke, he brought his weapon out, taking aim at the douche's face. As the super car finally became parallel with his Comet, he fired, the bright pink flare blasting through his windshield, shattering it on impact and into his opponent's, whose windshield became completely obliterated.

The flare reached its mark.

And the driver inside burst into flames as the world came to, the super car sliding away as the red Comet flew past, kicking up dust and sand into the Zentorno's path. The Comet's driver threw his hoof into the stick, swerved left, and drifted, before he returned the stick to its prior location and sped toward where he assumed the black and green Zentorno to be.

As the dust settled, he watched as the car appeared, now completely ablaze. Grinning, he pushed into the gas pedal for the final time, booping the back bumper and giving the Zentorno a boost. Stopping his car, he let the dust blow away around him as the super car drifted violently to the left a couple feet away. Pressing the button beside him, he quickly exited his Comet, watching as the Zentorno's left door flew open, the occupant inside now completely on fire, screaming bloody murder as he stumbled about like a decapitated chicken.

Quietly, so as to not disturb the wonderful sight, he got out his pump shotgun, cocking the fore end in anticipation.

His burning opponent tumbled toward him, yelling something he couldn't quite understand through the rather loud sound of the flames bursting across his body. They reached a couple feet from him, and he simply raised his shotgun up with one hoof, took aim, and fired a shell into his skull, sending his blazing body to the ground in a heap.

Lowering the firearm, he cocked it again, watching as the spent shell flew out the side and onto the ground by him. Walking up to the dead corpse, he casually picked up the wad of cash from the ground, shoving it into his stomach. He suddenly stopped as he noticed something else on the body, nestled within his leather jacket pocket. Brow raised in curiosity, he picked it up, unfurling it. Staring down at the previously folded paper, he rolled his eyes at what he saw, and placed it next to his money. Looking toward the Zentorno, he caught the sight of its exterior starting to catch fire. Thinking quickly, he sprinted toward the rear end, taking out a hammer as he knelt by the rear bumper. Raising the weapon, he threw it into the license plate, knocking it into the ground. Collecting it, he stuffed it too into his stomach, walking away and not daring to look back.

He reached the driver side of his Comet as the super car behind him exploded, bits and pieces flying high into the sky and landing near him, shattering and sliding as he attempted to wipe his brow, only stopping as he realized his predicament.

Sweeping his sight around the area, he gazed up at the beating sun, wondering why he was sitting in the middle of a desert with a heavy monkey mask on. Sighing, he puffed on his cigar, taking one last look at the body on the ground before it disappeared from sight. Nodding and smiling, he stepped on the gas pedal, his Comet speeding away from the scene in a dust cloud.

As he continued on his way, he leaned to his right, reaching for his iFruit phone and taking it out. Pressing down on the bottom right app, he pulled up Trackify, watching as the dot began blinking in the direction he was going. Watching it awhile, he quietly placed it on the dash, keeping it in sight as he pressed against the gas pedal even more.

Sighing, he attempted to try his hardest to not remember the sheet of paper he had found on his opponent's body, knowing full well what it would bring to him. Only thinking about not remembering it made him remember it more, and with one final growl - more to himself than anything else - he reached for it, unfolded it, and threw it in the passenger seat.

He didn't bother reading it. But a quick, involuntary glance to the side told him everything.

A picture of a stallion glared at the camera from underneath the large print at the top, a sign held out in front of him displaying his information, obvious anger and fury evident in his narrowed eyes that showed full well just how much he desired to not be there. The individual in question was a Pegasus though hard to see, with blue fur and a black, unkempt mane. Most notable was a slightly timeworn white and red mask strapped to his face, hiding the wearer's true intentions. All in all, he looked like someone to not be trifled with, lest death be the victim's only intention.

Below, it read:

BOUNTY: H2O DELIRIOUS
WANTED FOR MURDER, THEFT, AND ARSON
REWARD FOR CAPTURE: 9,000 BITS
DEAD OR ALIVE, PREFERABLY FLAYED AND SALTED
LAST SEEN IN PONYVILLE, EQ
DELIVER TO APPLEOOSA'S SHERIFF SILVERSTAR

He shook his head subconsciously, knowing full well who it was and what he had probably done. He had to admit, he was at least surprised it didn't involve hookers. It always involved hookers.

And so, for seemingly the umpteenth time in his life, Lui Calibre rolled his eyes in annoyance and shifted gears, hoping to make it out of the desert as soon as possible and clear as much ground from the soon-to-respawn assholes he had just murdered. He had a friend to find.

But, more importantly, he had a bounty to claim.

He smirked, puffed on his cigar, and accelerated, the Comet speeding through the Badlands as if it were the only thing alive among the wildlife, cacti, and RV-driving meth cooks.

Author's Notes:

I guess one more chapter couldn't hurt. Kind of unfair to just leave you guys without a proper goodbye anyway. So, yeah, I'm leaving for a bit. Sorry.

A glimpse to the future, maybe? Or perhaps a past experience...