The plan seemed simple enough. Nico would take the roof and use the crossbow (Which Nico somehow hid from me) to pick off the beavers from afar. The suits would go to myself, Mike, Dan, Tyler, Fire Lance and Blue Breeze…well basically everyone but Daring Do. What might feel like a death sentence seemed more like a minor inconvenience to Daring Do though.

“Relax” She assured us “I’ve learned a little in the last couple years”

“Sucks you didn’t learn how to make a sandwich BITCH” Mike grumbled from the corner, what good was a female if she couldn’t make sandwiches?

Meanwhile the doctor was preparing the spell while the nurse worked on Conor, managing to keep him alive. From the sounds of thinks he was managing, but not by much. The very thought of my friend dying send shivers down my spine.

I, Mike, Nico, Ayan, Dan, Fire Lance, Daring Do and Blue Breeze were in the fore front of battle. Apparently the doctor had a couple spare tools lying around that could be used as weapons. We had a Russian Nut Cracker (basically a baby sledgehammer), Daring Do’s machete (Which Daring Do wanted), a chainsaw, a combat knife, Lance’s old sword, a claw hammer, and a couple Molotov cocktails Dan made on the fly.

The spell itself was the biggest part. We would defend the front gate with melee weapons long enough for the doctor to prepare the spell and warp Conor to a nearby friend there. The spell would teleport us to Stalliongrad (Which I don’t know jack about) and it was a 1 way spell only, meaning we could go back once the spell was completed. The doctor also warned us that he could only teleport us in small groups, meaning in groups of up to 3 we would have to basically decimate our defenses every time. I was surprised to learn that the doctor, Daring Do, Lance and Breeze all preferred to fight their way out then escape with the spell.

“How come?” I asked

“I’d prefer getting attacked by Beibers then Gryphons any day” Lance joked, I was sure there was more truth to that joke then he wanted to reveal.

I looked out the nearby window on the first floor. Mike was “warming up” outside, beating a couple stray beavers with his hammer (Or well the hammer he claimed). Blue Breeze was awkwardly sitting down, waiting for the signal. Mike was chatting with Fire lance and Tyler was trying to solve a rubix cube he had randomly found. From above I could hear Nico’s occasional footsteps.

The Beibers were in an orderly fashion right outside the doctor’s house. Hundreds of them almost all waiting for us to make the first move, the solemn vigil of the Beibers was constantly increasing. It looked as if they were all around something though, perhaps a…leader?

“Get your armor on guys” Ayan said. Dropping to the floor a…care package; I opened up the package to see 6 juggernaut suits stacked neatly, on the other sides was a dozen throwing knives, some medical supplies, and an m60.

“Nico is going to have fun with this” I said, heaving the weapon up the stairs to show to Nico (Blue Breeze, Fire Lance and Daring Do not paying me any attention). Once we mounted it, it was lethally accurate and even more lethally deadly. The weapon also covered the entire field and if we wanted to we could have unleashed the weapon on the Beibers right now, though I was wary of ammo conservation.

I headed down stairs to see Gayan preparing everyone in the suits. I saw the one spare suit in the corner and grabbed it (The damn thing had to be 50 pounds!), hauling it to a better place to change. Putting it on was relatively simple, just put the legs on first, then clasp the things to the chest plate thing…then you put the neck thing on….then you kind of…fuck it ill just use the instruction manual.

***

I finally lumbered out of the bathroom in full gear. The armor was infuriatingly heavy and restricted my pace to nothing more than a cumbersome jaunt. The visor (Although bullet proof and obviously useful) restricted my eye vision amazingly. I knew it would take a hell of a lot of Beibers to tear the suit which gave me some confidence, but if I accidentally fell down and couldn’t get back up then I was screwed.

“Go get them colts” The doctor said “I’ll have Nico call you foal back in, have fun”

“We’ll try” I said, trying to re grip the small combat knife, why didn’t Gayan get us some guns? The knife looked puny in the midst of my giant glove, fortunately the advanced Russian combat suit made it possible for me to wield the blade, kind of. We all marched out of the doctor’s house and formed a wall right outside of the door. Mike had his normal confident smile on.

“This is going to be fun!” He said

For a moment us and the beavers just stared at each other, I finally had a perfect time to study them. There were hundreds of them alright, perfectly parallel with the house, looks like they wanted a fair fight. We all stood in a wall against the door side of the Doctor’s house. We knew on our own we would still be effective but to maximize Nico’s heavy MG we would need to stay close. The cocktails would also help if they were concentrated in a small vicinity.  

“If I may gentlecolts” Mike said, I was surprised he said gentlecolts and not gentlemen. he ran back inside and came out with a little record player, he slide a record on and almost instantly remembered where the song was from, heaven. Whatever it was it sounded like god shat out a boom box and was playing it down from the havens.

(Music, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z5W1NCmV_OM)

Like a command the Beibers all rushed towards us, we gave our best battle cry and rushed towards them as well. Mike ran out into the forehead of our blitz, with the hammer above his head (its metal part blood stained) he looked like an insane barbarian. The beavers lunged for him but with one massive strike Mike brought the hammer down in an arc and decimated the attackers, the Beibers now a red mist. I followed Blue Breeze and tried to keep his back. Blue Breeze’s strength was far from Mike’s uncharacteristic strength and it took a couple strikes to take his first beaver. Just as he was reloading I saw a beaver jump near him and I was lucky, I brought the knife through its neck in mid lunge. The little wanker dropped to the ground with a thump.

I saw a small burst wiz by my head and explode a nearby beaver. I turned around for a split second to see Nico waving at me with a smile. If it wasn’t for Mike’s screaming I would have been sucked up in the moment.

Before long the beaver’s began to retreat and we regrouped. Somehow none of us were injured, we had survived round 1. The only environmental difference was the battleground was coated with the dead Beibers. I was barely tired as well; I was smart and tried to not move at all. I learned it took a ton of energy to dodge attacks in the suit and it was better to just eat them.

“What a mess…” Mike joked. Mike was always at the fore front of the massacre, I always followed his hammer, knowing it would guide me to safety. I turned to see Daring Do doing surprisingly well. With her wings untethered by the suit she could fly away from the attack whenever wanted.

“O my god…” Mike said, it wasn’t in disappointment but in dis belief. I saw what he was talking about, I turned my head to see more Beibers slowly marching towards us…they dun be intelligent!

“These are some smart Beibers…” Fire Lance remarked

“No shit... FOR HONOR FOR GLORY!” Mike shouted, looking more like a blessed knight then a wiseass kid from NJ dressed in a juggernaut suit.

This time I was separated from my wingman Blue Breeze and me and Mike kicked ass, Jersey style.

Mike’s Hammer and my knife made a potent team. Bieber after Bieber was brutally “raped” by our skill. On a couple occasions we tried to be cinematic at some times. I remember turning around to see Mike just throwing Beibers like spears, while the Beiber’s friends slowly backed away…man I love Mike.

Before long the 2nd round subsided and we had another moment of silence.

“15 MINUTES” Nico shouted from the roof. I smiled; we were going to get out of this! Conor was going to survive!

The beavers charged yet again, this time with even greater force. From out of nowhere I saw a  beam of energy fly from the left and strike an upcoming beaver, killing him instantly. I turned to the side, call me insane, call me on crack, call me both, but I know what I saw. Ever play Dead Space 2? Well Issac Clarke was there on the side with a line gun in his advanced suit, yea I know…

“What the hell?” I asked, staring in confusion at the Rig-wearing super soldier.

“So where am I?” Issac asked randomly. All of a sudden (Just as random though) a drag tentacle came out of nowhere and dragged Issac down into hole, I heard the flat line moments later.

For a moment everyone stood there in awkward silence.

“So….who was that?” Mike asked

“….I think it was Issac Clark….you know from Dead Space?” I said

“O”

“O”

Everyone randomly stood there for a moment, then Nico unloaded with the M60 and the fighting continued. The onslaught ensued without end, our forces constantly fighting the Bieber menace. That is when I saw the leader, a giant beaver…with the biggest flow… EVER!

“JUSTIN BEAVER!” Nico screamed

“O shit I call this one!” Mike said in a slurred voice.

Gayan got cocky. He ran towards the beast alone without our support. The monster just flipped its flow and Gayan exploded into a bloody pulp. HE FLIPEPD HIS HAIR AND KILLED AYAN! AGAIN!

“HOLY FUCKING SHIT!” Blue Breeze screamed

“I love a challenge!” Mike said

The monster finally gave a high pitched scream and rushed forward. That is when I heard Dan’s little poker face snicker. I knew what was about to happen. From above the machine gun was chirping like a well maintenanced piston, sending round after round of heavy clambered bullets into the monster, wounding him slightly.

“Get back guys…” I said, Mike and Dan already knew, Tyler and Blue Breeze were more hesitant but complied. That is when I saw our 7 or 8 Molotov’s all fly out at a speedy pace and smash right onto the monster’s face. It fell and was ignited, but Mike always liked a good kill cam. He jumped up and did a 360 in the air, pulling out a throwing knife from his pocket.

The knife flew from his hand and struck the great Bieber, destroying his amazing flow, the source of its infinite power.

The beaver’s with their cute little feet looked stunned and began to slowly back away. Before breaking into a massive final charge at us, this was the coup de grace, the game winner.

“CHARGE” I shouted, running into the blitz once again.

Instead of the cautious and circumspect manner the beavers attacked us with before they used a complete blitz on us. They just rushed us in a complete line; casualties weren’t the biggest problem anymore.

Right when I thought we were going to break I realized how dwindled the enemy was. Most of the beavers were face down on the ground, weeping blood onto the once brown fertile soil.

“Good game” Mike said

“Good game” I joked, I found it amazing how at a time like this where we had just been fighting for our lives, the first thing that pops into my head is Modern Warfare 3.

“Best 360 throwing knife EVER!” Tyler said, removing his juggernaut helmet.

I looked down at Gayans once normal looking body, now torn in twain and bloody. For the first time in my life I feared dying, I feared the emptiness of never achieving my goals, the fear of failing my friends, the failure of failing.

“I guess we should give him a proper burial.” Mike said

“Okay…” Blue Breeze said, there was an awkward moment of silence.

“Okay you can do that Blue Breeze; I don’t want to touch him…” Mike said, Mike and I headed back into the house before the stunned weather pony could object.

“Perfect timing foal” The doctor said “I just transported your friend to my friend in Stalliongrad, are you ready to leave?”

“Hang on doc” I said, I turned to Mike and made my voice a whisper “Should we really go? Why didn’t anyone else want to go?”

“I don’t care, as long as I can get away from fucking beavers with flow and hot farmer daughters and get into the city.” Mike responded

I gave a nod, I was half sad half relieved No one else was coming. It still felt like an adventure, but still a dangerous one.

“Daring Do, Blue Breeze are you coming?” I asked again.

“Stalliongrad? Hay no” Blue Breeze said “I’m just going to get back home, to Ponyville”

“Wait you are going to Ponyville?” I asked, I wanted to ask him about Marshal and Sam, but I didn’t know there pony names, and I wasn’t about to give myself away.

“Stalliongrad?” Daring Do asked “I’ll take my chances on the road, you colts go ahead though, and maybe we can meet up again later”

“What’s wrong with Stalliongrad?” Mike asked

“Can I come?” Ayan asked, so he just spawned somehow again...

“No, you tried to kill us…several times” I said

“BUT I SAVED YOUR LIVES!” Ayan said

“True, but your still annoying as fuck” Tyler said

“Fine, I’ll like leave you alone though, k?”

“Fine” Mike said with a sigh “Shoot us there doc”

The doc gave us an impish shrug “Good luck, You 3 can go first, then you 2 can go next. Try and not get killed”

Before I could ask for further information I was sent spiraling into whiteness before arriving to my destination.

Next Chapter: Russian Equestria! Estimated time remaining: 4 Hours