I bet you're wondering why I gathered you all here...

You--What?!

You gathered us all here!?

Nobody's seen you for months!

Yes...

...And I bet you're wondering why that is...

NO!

...I'm wondering...

Thank you Polly-Wanna-Pipper...

You see...

...After our momentous order was laid upon us...

...I found myself adrift in unfamiliar lands...

...I had to subsist on morning dew and pebbles for all the while...

...Eventually, when all else was lost, I found myself remembering my dear family...

...And I was eager to embrace my end...

You suck!

But!

Before sweet death could claim me...

...I remembered my boy...

...And I had to return...

...So now I'm here...

...

...

...Okay...

So what I'm hearing is that after you were told to go buy dinner at Burger King, you got lost in the parking lot, where you lived off of Mountain Dew and gravel for weeks instead of going inside the store...

...Then you remained there sulking in said parking lot--likely drawing everypony's attention as they just walked around you--until you heard Pip set you up for a punchline. Does that about cover it...?

...

...One would argue that gravel has the same nutritional value as Burger King.

Can we send him back?

We now return to regularly scheduled stupidity.

Also, go check out the V-Day announcement! HERE!!