As we were leaving, we got to see a bit more of this Ponyville. We saw ponies selling things, ponies building things, ponies doing exactly the same things that we humans would do. A world ruled by ponies, I thought to myself, why couldn't it have been something more badass like Middle-earth or Westeros?

Anyway, as we were just walking along, I said to the guys, "Guys, I have a feeling we're not in Texas anymore."

Andrew said, "Don't you mean Kansas?"

Then I said, "Yes, but technically we're not from Kansas."

"Oh yeah, that's right."

After receiving some stares from passerby ponies, Jonathan finally decided to speak. "Just where are we heading, exactly?"

"I don't know," I stated nonchalantly, "as long as I don't have to be around anymore talking ponies, I don't care where we go."

"I just hope the next place we're in doesn't look like it came out of a coloring book," Jonathan commenced his bitching. "Having to look at all of these over-the-top colorful buildings, ponies, and landscapes are making me want to drown myself in a pool of ink."

Yeah, I might've forgotten to point out just how much the guys and I seem to really stick out in this world. While everything around us looks like its from any kids cartoon show, the three of us surprisingly didn't seem to change in anyway. To put it more bluntly, this all feels like going to Toontown in Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Anyway, when we came to the end of Ponyville, Andrew suddenly grabbed me by the shoulder and pulled me back. I then realized that he did this because some moron who was driving a chariot almost ran me over! I cried, "Hey asshole, why don't you watch where you're driving?!" and then out of the chariot came a pony unlike any other.

This pony was a lot taller than the other ponies; while the ponies we met before were only as tall as our crotch area, this pony is able to look at all three of us by the same eye level. She also had on golden horse shoes (no pun intended), a golden necklace, and a golden crown. And aside from the long horn atop her forehead and her large white wings that could easily wrap all three of us in one big hug, her mane shines with the colors of a rainbow that flows without any assistance from wind. This pony then trot towards us and said, "Hello, you must be the three who fell out of the sky. And you are...?"

"I'm Andrew."

"I'm Jonathan."

"And I'm Jeffrie. Who the Hell are you?"

Taking no offense to my comment, the pony gave us her name. "I am Princess Celestia; I am the ruler of Equestria."

Cute title for a ruler, I chuckled inside. "I'm sorry, but did you just say that you're a princess?"

"That's right," she clarified, "And I'm also the ruler of all Equestria."

OK, what dumbass taught this chick how a monarchy works?! My inner chuckle immediately turned into an uncontrolable guffaw. "All right missy, I understand that you must be trying to show just what a capable leader you might be destined to be, but I'm pretty sure that meeting new arrivals is the queen's job."

Her welcoming smile transformed itself into an annoyed frown. "There is no queen; I am Equestria's sole leader."

"Yeah right, and I'm the King in the North!" after getting that little jape out of my system, I told the pony princess, "listen Princess, you want to think that you're not a figurehead, then by all means believe whatever the fuck you believe in. We on the otherhand are in a real hurry to get out this town. Toodles!"

As we were about to leave, Princess Celestia had suddenly teleported herself right in front of us and said, "And where are you three going?"

"Away from here," I said.

"Anywhere in particular?"

"Uh...yeah, we're going to a place that has humans and no talking ponies."

"Well I'm afraid that you three won't find such a place like that here; I've been to every city, town, and village in Equestria, and not once have I ever seen anyone of your kind before."

Andrew and Jonathan both looked at eachother as if all of their hope had been drained. But I wasn't about to let some pony princess tell me that we can't accomplish this. "Well you're a fucking horse, so how would you know? In fact, since I brought that up, why don't you go eat some hay? And better yet, why don't you and all those other ponies start neighing like normal horses?"

"I just think that it would be wise that you three stay here."

"And I think that you should get the fuck out of our way before I throw you away!"

The moment she stomped her hoof and let out a brutal huff, I could of sworn that Andrew was prepared to drop to his knees by then. "Do not dare threaten me, for I am more powerful than I appear!"

"Oh really, what're you gonna do, Princess? Strike me with lightning?" when I turned my back on her, I suddenly heard a loud bang and I felt a short of burning pain coming from my ass! "What the Hell was that?!"

"Oh nothing," chuckled Celestia as she looked away with a playful smirk on her face, "I just summoned a lightning bolt to strike your rear end."

I was then about to lunge towards her and beat the shit out of her, but Andrew's strong arms were holding me back. While being restrained by my pal, I was shouting stuff like, "Let me at her! LET ME AT HER! Nobody strikes me in the ass and gets away with it! When I get ahold of you, I'm gonna rip off that horn of yours and shove it right up your fucking...!"

Putting his hand over my mouth right in the middle of my threat/promise, Andrew said to Celestia, "I'm sorry ma'am, but you'll have to excuse our friend."

"Yeah," Jonathan followed, "he has a tendency of letting his mouth get too much control over him. (Which is why it's a miracle that he's not stuck in prison.)"

"Anyway, Princess, ma'am," Andrew tried to sound courteous, "might I add on what beautiful hair you have; did you fix it yourself or do you have private hair stylist to take care of that for ya? I must imagine every guy who lays eyes on you is just begging to be your husband. Also..." Jonathan managed to give Andrew a light kick to the shin before he made the pony princess think he was propossing to her. "You uh...said that we should stay?"

"Yes, that I did." Celestia--after giggling to herself from Andrew's over-the-top compliments--then explained some more. "I strongly suggest that you three should stay in Ponyville, and spend six days with Twilight Sparkle and her friends."

Jonathan then said, "So basically you want us to do six days of community service?"

"You can say that," said Celestia.

Jonathan and Andrew were both silent for awhile. Andrew was the first to reach a decision. "I suppose that wouldn't do us no harm."

Jonathan gave the princess his answer in his own somber way. "Well, if I have to decide on spending six days of my life being held hostage by potential kidnappers, or risk traveling miles to nowhere and getting myself robbed and rapped by some thug disguised as a harmless hobo or by a sleazy hooker who tricked me into thinking she actually cared about me...I suppose that the former would be the least miserable."

"Very well..." Celestia adverted her uncomfortable gaze away from Jonathan as she put back her cheerful mask on before speaking to me. "And what is your answer?"

Finally being realeased from Andrew's bear grip, I took a deep breath before I gave the pony princess my answer. "No, no. Mmm-mmm, mmm-mmm. No, no, no! Hell no! NO! NO! I refuse to...no! NO!"

But despite that, me and the guys had suddenly found ourselves upon the door step of one Twilight Sparkle.

When Twilight opened the door, she was more shock to see the Princess as opposed to us. "Princess Celestia, what brings you here?"

"Oh nothing much," said Celestia, "I just came to tell you that for the next six days, these three are going to be living with you and your friends."

Twilight then finally acknowledge our pressence. "So you three decided to stay here?"

Right when I was about to say otherwise, Celestia said, "Not yet, but who knows? After they spend some time with you and your friends, they might like staying in Ponyville after all."

"My ass!" I muttered. And ironically, another bolt of lightning just happened to have striked me on the ass again. As Andrew was using his tackling skills to pull me away from Celestia, I cried out to her, "Strike me again, strike me with lightning again! I dare you, I double dare you, bitch! Just strike me in the ass with lightning one more God damn fucking time, and see what happens next!"

Celestia then warned Twilight, "I'd be careful around that one if I were you."

And Twilight said, "I'll be sure to keep that in mind."

And then with that being said, Celestia then got back on her chariot and flew off into the sky.