The sun shines brightly over the not-so-small town of Ponyville. The birds are chirping as they fly from tree to tree, greeting one another while the ponies around the town performs the same task. Smiles light up the faces of those walking around the town. The only smile that seems to be absent from the portrait of an otherwise-happy town was that of my own. And for all good reason too.

"Ow."

That is the only word I have been chanting on my way back from the little regiment that Shining Armor put me through this morning. Every time I swing my arms. "Ow." Every step I take towards one of the guest rooms of the palace. "Ow." With every breath I take to get there. "Ow." I was worked like a dog, and for a reason that I didn't even know existed.

However, it was an issue that I was going to vocalize to the one individual that I knew couldn't overlook my problem. As I approached one of the guest rooms, I could see about five guards standing around, watching and waiting for something, or should I say somepony, to take her leave towards Canterlot in an hour or so. Storming to the door, I held onto a sack that held some rather weighty documents to get me through.

"Excuse me. I need to speak with Princess Celestia." I said as I approached the door.

"I'm sorry sir. She is not allowing any visitors to see her at this time." One of the guards, namely one with a gray coat and yellow eyes, stated as he stood in front of the door.

"Look, I know you like to follow orders and shit, but I am really not in the mood to be ignored. Please, I humbly beseech you... to let me through that door."

"And I humbly ask you to leave her to her business. She is not taking any visitors today."

I didn't have time for this. I pulled out the papers and shoved it in the guards face out of frustration. "I think this would warrant my need to see her."

"Sir, no matter what document you-IS THAT AN APPLICATION OF APPROVAL!?" He shouted, pulling in the paper, causing all of the other guards on watch to look at me with curiosity.

"No, I used it to wipe my ass. I call this magnificent invention toilet paper-OF COURSE IT IS!" I was in pain, so I didn't think to hold back on anything that was stopping me from seeing the princess. Seeing her before she left was my number one priority.

"Well, I'm afraid that even with such a document, I am at no liberty to allow anypony-"

The door opened behind him. Sounds of the other guards grunting in surprise reached my ears. I looked over to see what was the commotion was all about and their response was to turn to whatever wall the stood in front of. Meanwhile, I heard a familiar voice call out from the room. "What's going on out here?"

"Gah!" The grey guard saw Princess Celestia and blushed. He immediately looked to the ground. "Your highness! Forgive me for the obstructions. I tried to inform this fellow that-"

Celestia took notice of my standing here and waived to me. "Oh! Good morning, Nondis. Are you enjoying the weather this morning?"

I can tell that she was growing fond of the Ponyville morning she awoke to. But right now, I had much more pressing issues on my mind than the weather. "I've enjoyed a little more than what I was comfortable with. Could we speak for a moment?"

"Why certainly. I was surprised that I was not alerted on your visit earlier."

The guard that stood against me was still planting his eyes on whatever speck of dirt that was laying on the floor rather than looking to the princess of the sun. "Well, I- well you see... I didn't want to disrupt you at such an intimate time."

I really didn't see how this was an intimate time for her. But now that he mentioned it, she does look a bit... naked without her crown and regalia. I don't even think that I've seen her without her golden slippers on. It's a rather strange sight to see her in the nude. I guess I've grown so used to her being dressed up. Apparently, the guards were sharing the same thoughts I had but to a higher degree.

"Please come inside, Nondis." She said, walking back into the room and holding the door open for me.

I spoke as I painfully walked into her room. "So, I assume that you know why I'm dropping in on you."

"I can safely assume it has something to do with your approval process?" She guessed.

"About that, would you care to explain to me why I have to be an enlisted?"

"What?" She asked. Though I knew that she was playing dumb at this point.

Bringing up the papers again, I laid it out on the table and showed the part that Shining Armor was so kind to highlight for me. "You know, this passage here."

"Oh, that. I would've thought that Twilight would've informed you of it."

You know, I'm beginning to think that these princesses are telling me things halfway just to see my reaction for when the other half of the truth comes to light. Well I guess this princess must be having a ball then. "First, it was the marriage part that I was completely unaware of. I can deal with that, but this military gig... I'm not exactly in the best condition to be sent out to fight."

"Have you seen yourself move?" She questioned me, walking over towards a table on the other side of the room.

I don't need to see myself move to tell that I was in pain. "What does that have to do with anything?"

Pouring up a cup of tea for herself and me, she answered my question with a rather... unexpected answer. "I believe that your reflexes, despite needing a bit of improvement, are vastly superior to that of us equines. Just give it a shot."

And how does that work out? I'm half as strong, half as fast on foot and I can't fight worth a damn. "I still don't see the real reason of why I'm being thrown into the military. Could you elaborate on that?"

"Well..." She levitated one of the small cup towards me and took the other to her lips. "If you must know, then I shall say it upfront."

"...And that is?"

The small tea cup clattered on the miniature saucer it now rested on. Celestia levitated her own drink towards the nightstand. "I do not mean to offend, but since the incidents with both Caramel and Shining Armor, I'm questioning your abilities to defend yourself."

"There it is." I quietly mumbled out in shame.

"Now I can understand how Shining Armor, being trained in the art of combat, is able to overthrow you. That and his magical abilities. But Caramel was nothing more than a run-of-the-mill... um..."

"Asshole?"

"Aggressor, yes. I also came understand that you have not had much combat experience outside of your scuffle with him, is that correct?"

"More or less." Embarrassed, I buried myself in the tea she gave me. But before I could go find Narnia in that small cup, she took both the cup and it's saucer away from me.

"Then this would be a benefit to your health and well-being. Not only that you will be able to defend yourself, but also Twilight Sparkle if the occasion calls for it."

Does that mean I can hold my own with any other stallion, namely the ones who want to see me dead? If that's the case... "So... if I train, then I might be able to challenge even Shining Armor?"

A smirk crept to the sun princess' face as she pulled a chair up to the table she sat at. "Come. Sit."

I walked over to accommodate her. But as I sat down, I had noticed that she reached her hoof out to me, anchoring herself to the table. "Okay, what's with the hoof?"

"I am sure that you are familiar with the recreational function known as hoof-wrestling, are you not?"

Really, an arm-wrestling match? This was either going to end badly for her or end very badly for her. I know I can beat a princess who doesn't seem to do much but smile and wave. "I'm familiar with it's human variant."

"Despite our anatomical differences, we are still the same in this aspect."

Then again, I guess she does have a bit of strength since she has to get around using those, especially given her size. But still, she could be flying around for half the time rather than walking. "Don't you walk on those?"

"I will allow minimal resistance, please feel free to engage me when you are ready."

Sure, why not. I need a mood-booster for the morning. At the very least, I can say to myself that I can win in an arm-wrestling match. Reaching out with my right hand, I met with her hoof at the center of the table. "I guess I could amuse you-"

"With both, please."

My grip loosened at her suggestion. "Both what?"

"Both arms."

Was she really this fucking cocky? Wow! I don't know this princess in the slightest. I guess I will just play her little game. "...Okay. But don't say that this wasn't unfair."

She gave off a playful yawn as my left hand soon joined the right in it's effort to overthrow the princess. I looked to the sun princess, who gave me a shit-eating grin. I wanted to wipe that look off of her face so badly right now. Throwing all I could into my arms, I pushed against her with all of my might, expecting her to go down quickly... Only there was a slight problem...

"What the fuck?"

"I said that you may begin. Haven't you started already?"

That was just it! She didn't move a single atom while I was churning out as much energy as a nuclear reactor to overthrow her! Grunting and straining the muscles in my face, I pressed and pressed until my arms had started to hurt again. Backing off in pain, I rolled my neck and stretched my arms to loosen up.

"Just give me a moment."

"Take your time." She said with that same snarky grin.

By now, I was well over three-thousand percent over it. I wanted to take her down no matter the costs. I stood up from the table and gave myself some leverage as I locked back onto her hoof. She continued to smile while I felt the muscles in my face twist and contort into foul shapes. Gritting my teeth, I pushed against her with everything I had. Every last bit of my being went into this last effort. I wanted to make that smile go away. I refuse to lose to her.

But by the time I blinked, I went from standing on the table in front of her, to staring up at her from the floor.

I think I heard a duck quacking in my brain as I just realized that I had lost.

"I have a slight hunch that you were resisting."

"I said that I would offer minimal resistance. I never said that I was not going to resist at all." Translation: no shit, Sherlock.

"Point taken. But what was the purpose of this little... exhibition?" I think I'm laying in a crater right now.

"I simply desired to have a little fun with you. Regardless of if you were a trained stallion, how strong you were or how many hooves you used, I'd never lose a match. Not even once has my own sister buried me under the table."

Ha ha, very funny. Ha ha, it is to laugh. I hope she doesn't mind, but I think I'm just gonna sit here and wallow in the manner of my defeat. This crater feels kinda nice, how it curves and contours to every part of my body.

...Yeah, I'm gonna just... this.

"So what happened exactly that caused you to become so angry?" Celestia inquired above me.

Well, I'm more humbled than angry right now, so it's a little hard to be angry over something that happened just earlier when I lose to a snarky princess who does absolutely nothing but smile and wave. But thankfully, my beatdown didn't result in me having amnesia. "Well, Shining Armor thought it would be a good idea to wake me up at around four in the morning to run me around Sweet Apple Acres."

Giggling a bit, Celestia reached her hoof down to help me back up. "I see."

Taking her offer, I pulled against her and left the imprint I made into the tiled floor. "Isn't he a prince? Doesn't he have some other princely things to do beside ride my ass every three seconds over what a push-up looks like?"

"Meaning that he carries that title does not give him the authority of one. He is still a member of the royal guard. He just so happens to overlook an entire department of the EUP."

If he overlooks an entire department of the military, then does that mean... oh please let there be a god to deny that from happening. "So... is he going to be like my drill instructor or something?"

"No. I have you arranged with somepony else in mind."

Thank you, God! "So who would be in charge of me?"

---

You've... got to be shitting me. There is no way I'm gonna be the fodder to her. I can't believe this is happening. This is happening. Why is this even a thing?

"Come on, Nondis. You not supposed to touch the ground when you go down." Rainbow Dash chided me on my performance, being more of a hindrance than a help.

"That would be easy knowing that you weren't sitting on top of me." I grunted out through gritted teeth as I shook under her weight.

"Hey, meaning that I'm your friend outside of these little regiments, doesn't excuse you from the treatment I'm gonna be giving you when you start basic training."

At the very least, I knew the drill instructor. And since I was friends with her, she would see to it that I do everything in my power to succeed. She would be a bit of a hard-ass at the same time, but I knew she would also be giving me bits of encouragement. Though that still didn't excuse her from sitting on my back as I tried to do my push-ups.

"So is this a 'just-me' thing?"

"Nah! I'll be sitting on everypony else while I'm there. Just be happy that I'm not standing on on top of you."

That sounds even more painful. In fact, if you add in the total weight distribution her ass is giving me in comparison to all four of her hooves, it's like having a little over half her weight versus all of it on top of me. "I kinda see your point there."

"Now enough of the talk. I wanna see you sweat!"

After another strenuous push-up, I brought myself to bring up a topic of interest. "Permission to speak freely, ma'am?"

"Address me as sir."

"Permission to speak freely, sir!"

"Start talking."

First, let's start off on something that I really wanted to ask since my finding out that Rainbow Dash was slated to be my instructor. "So... when were you a member of the EUP?"

"A year or so before you even came here. I had completed my Wonderbolt Reserve training and my basics after."

"Why didn't you start basics before you went to camp?" I asked as I performed another push-up.

"I didn't know everything there was to be qualified for basic training. So I had to study the history of the EUP, as well as the history of the Wonderbolts, which I will have the honor of teaching you myself."

"Oh no you won't!" I heard a third voice call out from out of nowhere. In a flash of magenta, Twilight appeared before me and Rainbow Dash.

"Let me guess, you're going to show him some of your flashcards so he can learn the entire history of the EUP?" Rainbow mocked.

Walking over to me, giving me a bit of a nuzzle, she stood to challenge Rainbow. "Well, no offense but I believe that I would be a better fit to instruct him on the history of our military system."

"You're not even an enlisted, civy!"

"Civy?" I asked, being that it was the first time I heard something like that. Apparently, Twilight was just as stumped as I was.

"Short for civilian."

"Oh. But still, I don't know how you could instruct him when you had so much trouble learning these things yourself." Twilight challenged.

"That's all the more reason for me to teach him!" Rainbow rebutted as the others walked up to us.

"Here we go again." Fluttershy mumbled to herself.

Popping out of her mane, a miniature version of Discord cheered the two on. "Ohoo! I love a good argument between friends. So what would it be this time, ladies? Boxing ring or my personal favorite, gladiatorial colosseum?"

With a snap of his fingers, he became dressed in full-gladiatorial attire, complete with a net and a trident.

Fluttershy stepped in to stop Discord before he started to get carried away. "How about, we try to show him the different ways he could learn first, and then he can make a decision of whether or not he wants to try a specific method?"

Rarity squeed as she ran up to me with her suggestion. "Why I'm more than sure I could fix up a few humanized replicas of the old uniforms so that he could feel more acquainted with the history. Or maybe a tour through a historical museum-

"Book." I interrupted.

"Huh?" Rarity stalled as she looked at me quizzically.

"Just give me a book. Quiz me on it later." I clarified, not wanting to waste any time on touring some exhibit.

"That's the spirit!" Twilight cheered as she summoned a stack of flashcards by her side.

"That's so lame!" Rainbow jeered.

"Or maybe we could-"

"No rapping, Pinkie!" Twilight interrupted before Pinkie could get her thoughts out in the open.

Pinkie groaned in defeat. "I was going to say that we could probably do a fun musical number on how the EUP was made. You know, a more classical approach."

"Musical?" Well I'll be damned, a method of learning that tailors to me. Well holy high-horse, Batman! Sign me up!

"Oh no..." Twilight shook her head as Pinkie

Rarity shouted to the pink pony as she started to pull something out of her mane. "Pinkie, don't you even dare pull out that atrocious hat!"

Pulling out a phonograph, which I'm still questioning how the hell something so big could fit in that pink puffy mane, Pinkie placed it right next to me and shoved Rainbow Dash off of my back. "I think I know your kind of language, Non-Non."

"I'm not gonna like this, am I?" Twilight mumbled.

"I can't wait for her to start!" I exclaimed, hoping to hear how Pinkie will lay it out for me. I've always been a sucker for music.

"Well, then let's get it started!" (ctrl+click, read along with the music)

"Whatever!"

"Do you think that being inaccurate would help you on your test?"

"No, but making fun of history is how I learn it best."

"You didn't have to rhyme what I said."

"Whatever. Practical studying is dead." (HEY!) "But anyways, let's get back into the main subject at hand."

"Now as you know, that event in history is called the Celestial-Lunar rift. Where the two sisters, and their factions, started to go adrift. Now if you read in history, chapter twelve, section b, you'll find that later at that time, Celestia-"

"BOOOOR-ING! Pinkie, take me back, please."

(Jerk!)

The girls and Discord applauded my being able to quickly learn the basic details of how the EUP was formed. Twilight was the only exception as she facehoofed herself.

"Wow... is that how it really happened?" I asked.

"Well... the details of its formation isn't exactly a thing to boast about. Which is why some of the more common ranks are practically inept at anything dangerous." Discord stated, which caused both Twilight and Rainbow Dash to glare at him. It seemed with Rainbow being a current member and Twilight having an older brother in charge of one of it's divisions, they both became quite riled at his response. Before things got bad, Discord took notice of the two disapproving glances. "No offense?"

"So the Lunar Faction was trying to avoid a civil war, all while inexplicably causing one." I said as I slowly made my way back up on my push-ups.

"It never really got off the ground because most of them were very poorly trained. Not to mention that a solid majority of them had never picked up a spear to save their life." Rainbow added to my statement.

Oh... So they were a bunch of pansies. So does that make Shining Armor- "Anyways, can we please discuss this whole 'Civil War' thing that happened shortly after Moonbutt's banishment?"

"...Princess Luna?" Twilight corrected me begrudgingly.

"Moonbutt, yes. It's just a nickna-"

"Please don't call her that." She scolded.

"If you say so, Sparklebutt." I called back jokingly, laughing a bit as Twilight looked at me with a scowl on her face.

"Rainbow, sit!" Twilight called out, making her friend jump back on my back, sending me back down to the ground in discomfort.

"D'OOOH!" I cried out as I cringed. "Rainbow, what the hell?"

"Sorry, following orders."

Letting the pain subside, I allowed myself to rest a bit. "I get it. Now back to the question."

Twilight took in a deep breath and recomposed herself. "Again saying, there wasn't really a civil war, per se. But there was a conflict between two armed parties that started to escalate towards that route. The Lunar Faction argued that Princess Celestia was plotting some sort of regime, what with the banishment of Princess Luna. This was a secret organization that... well... fancied the princess in a... peculiar way."

"Are you serious?" I started to laugh again. It was completely absurd to think that fanboy armies had actually existed back in the day. "Luna had a fanboy army? I wonder how high the approval applications would've stacked up."

Twilight gave me that familiar scowl. "Rainbow-"

"Shutting up. Go on ahead." I quickly snapped myself out of my laughing fit and let Twilight continue the story.

"So Princess Celestia gathered some of her best-trained guards. By the time the Lunar Faction had stood outside the palace gates, they were already prepared for a full-scale conflict. In short, the faction saw that Celestia meant business and shortly reconsidered their place in society."

That still left me with one question. "I'm still stuck on how they managed to convert into the EUP."

"To say the least, it was said that the persuasion methods were... well... anticlimactic." Discord answered.

"How anticlimactic?"

"Hoof wrestling." He finished, causing me to choke on my own spit.

"You've got to be shitting me." No really, I can't even think of anything else to say in response to that. That's just embarrassing.

"Now what did Ah tell ya about that kind of language?" Applejack called at me, correcting me on my usage of profanity. I had almost forgotten that she didn't like foul words.

"Sorry." After apologizing to the farm mare, I turned my attention back to the purple mare in front of me. "But seriously, what?"

"She challenged the faction leaders to competitions all around the country. And within a month, the faction was quelled and became the new extension to the now-expanded military. The week after her victory, she dubbed the massive guard faction the Earth-pony, Unicorn and Pegasus Guard."

In all, I'm actually surprised. "Wow. I would've thought that it would've taken a dark turn."

"How dark?"

"Well, if I'm reminded of anything, it would be the French Revolution back on my world. It lasted from 1789 to 1799 Anno Domini."

Twilight quirked an eyebrow. "That still doesn't explain the reason for it being so dark."

I had to think of a way to put it without revealing how violent it was. Fluttershy was not exactly one of strong constitution and Rarity doesn't like anything too overly violent. The others were fine, but I wasn't going to compromise their comforts. "In a nutshell, the citizens got pissed off because they were starving and the rich were living it up. Insults from the wealthy spurred violence. The people mobilized, they ran to a local prison, stormed the place, stormed the palace, and captured the king."

"What happened then?"

"Well..." Louis Auguste de France, formerly known as King Louis XVI was then tried and found guilty of high treason and crimes against the state. Six days later, he was executed by means of decapitation via the guillotine. But that's a little too violent to go into detail. "The king was humbled, and he learned that if he had humbled himself sooner, he would've still been ahead in life."

"Oh, well that doesn't sound too bad." Twilight stated, unaware of what I was implying by my play on words. Honestly, I'm surprised she didn't catch that.

"That's it? Surely there was a bit of chaos to pursue the sudden power-shift." Discord asked.

Immediately, I rolled over to get Rainbow Dash off of me, got back to my feet and walked over to Discord, whispering to him in a low voice. "The period from the days onward to the year after was called the 'Reign of Terror', if that's what you wanna know."

"Don't see how it's so terrible if people were getting reformed." He was still going off of my previous statement. Being that he was a practitioner of chaos and disorder, I could disclose the more grisly details to him.

"Fourteen thousand died."

Instantly, his eyes grew and his jaw dropped. "Oh... How did that happen?"

"Remember how I said that the king had never gotten ahead in life? In case you didn't know, that was a play on words..."

After a few seconds of letting him dissect the meaning of my statement, it finally dawned on him what had actually happened to the ill-fated king. "Oh goodness..."

"Yeah, that happened. Fourteen thousand times over."

Discord inadvertently placed a claw on his lengthy neck, cringing all the while. "Couldn't they have come up with a less... pugnacious solution over a nice cup of tea?"

"That's what the nobles tried when their armies fled." I whispered back.

"And how did that work out?"

"They got a nice tour of the city from the top of a pike."

Discord almost seemed to lose some of his color as the imagery started to manifest itself in his mind. "I suppose that is a little... dark."

"What are you two talking about?" Fluttershy asked, snapping us both back into the present.

"Nothing you need to worry about." I answered quickly as the draconequus walked back to his beloved caretaker.

I've never really thought about how bad Celestia's situation could've been at that time. Which is why I'm questioning the legitimacy of Equestria's history books.

"Discord, are you feeling okay?" The yellow timid pegasus asks quietly.

I think I told him a bit too much. He suddenly has this thousand-yard stare as he answers Fluttershy. "Just fine, my dear."

Almost on cue, a rumbling noise sound pierces the silence. I couldn't help but to quickly walk towards the nearest eatery. My time with Shining Armor this morning had left me unfed, but I don't think anypony else knew that. "I'm dog-tired... and hungry. Time for lunch!"

Pinkie started to prance over to Sugarcube Corner, but Rainbow Dash held her tail down to prevent her from wandering off, more than likely to get anything for me to snack on. "You can go to lunch after you finish your daily dose of push-up. Now get back on the ground, and start pushing." The rainbow-maned pegasus said as she held Pinkie in place.

"Just for five minutes?" I asked, hoping to change her mind.

"Nope."

"Can I do my push-ups after I eat something. All I need is an apple." I asked, hoping that Applejack would get a clue. Sadly, she was not taking any sides to this argument, much less mine.

"No."

"Can't I just-"

"DOWN, PRIVATE!" Rainbow shouts at the top of her lungs.

"Yes, sir!"

Dropping back to the ground, I strove to finish my push-ups so that I could reward myself with a large meal. The first few were easy enough to do, but then Rainbow took it a step further and sat back on me, making my already-difficult task even more challenging.

"These next ten weeks are gonna be so, so sweet."

These next ten weeks are going to be hell

---

After my set of push-ups, the girls treated me to a large dinner. After the meal, Twilight and I had came back to the palace for an intense cram session. In three hours, I was taught, quizzed and tested on every aspect of the formation of the EUP and it's auxiliaries. And if there was one thing that Twilight was not letting me get by on in our study session, it was the details to each event that went down.

As for the arm-wrestling, Celestia has gone undefeated for well over a thousand years. I guess that's why she was wearing that smug grin when I stood up to take her down. That also explains how she could man-handle me in that match. Not only was it a display of her power, it was also one that didn't resort to violence, despite the craters she made from every opponent. It was also a much quicker ordeal than talking it up with politics. Though it does make me question her methods of foreign policy.

After that history session, Twilight had started to move all of the books back to their respective positions on shelves. Though what would take a human several minutes to do, she finished it in mere seconds. It made me think more about how smart she really was and just how powerful her magic was to lift so many items at once.

I'll admit, I was starting to become a little jealous. I wanted to do cool stuff like that too, but I knew that with me being a human, it was very unlikely to happen. However, it didn't exactly stop me from imagining myself lifting my hand at an object and pretending I'm Magneto from the X-Men comics. Even Twilight had started to take notice.

When we had gotten back to my room, she summoned her friendship journal, placing it on the desk for her to write in. When she glanced at me, I was mocking her ability to levitate.

"What is up with your fascination of magic lately?"

"Well, I'm living here now. Doesn't that mean that I would soon be a magic user? I mean I get that I won't be using unicorn-tier magic but I think if I stay a little longer, I might just get some."

"Sweetie, not to be a downer, but you've been here for well over seven months. Don't you think that if you had any chance of obtaining magic, you would've by now?"

"Well, I might need to stay a little longer. My body does need to adapt."

Twilight chortled at my response. "Why do you want magic so bad?"

"Because it's awesome." I responded, landing myself in the bed.

Twilight opened her journal and commenced to writing her entry. As the pen scribbled on the paper, she turned back to me. "It can be a bit of a curse as well."

"How so?"

With one final scrape of the quill, Twilight finished her entry and walked over to me. "Equestria is, as you already know, a land that's filled with magic. And us ponies can't control our world without it. Our magic is gifted from birth and given away at death."

"I don't mean to wander into such dark places, but where does your magic go when you die?"

She sat beside me, smiling as she levitated my hand to her hoof. "Only fate knows the answer."

I don't know why this conversation scared me so much. I guess it was because of the implications of Twilight dying. I really wasn't prepared for something like that. Hell, I wasn't even prepared to see Pinkie being abused but she was. And just like that, it was as certain as my need for another breath. "So could you... be reincarnated by magic?"

"It's possible, but the individual will retain their personality. The only thing that you would be able to replicate is the magic the pony used before."

It does begs the question of her being a reincarnation of some powerful figure in history. I guess it would make sense if I had to explain her magical prowess. "So... would that make you the reincarnation of Starswirl the Bearded?"

She laughed at my question, leaning against me. "What do you know about Starswirl the Bearded?"

"Nothing, I just know he's the main contributor to all of the current knowledge of magic. But then again, you kept talking about him when I first got here."

She sighed deeply as her hoof brushed against my hand. "That was when we were talking about making a portal for you."

"So... does alchemy work in this world?" Dammit, did I really ask that?

"Of course. It's just basic scientific principles combined with magic. It's how we unicorns can manage to change an object's composition, that is if you were trained enough."

So it does? Okay, then let me go a little further. "So... there is a such thing as the Laws of Equivalent Exchange?"

"Laws of what now?"

Perhaps I needed to explain myself further. "Human or ponykind cannot gain anything without first giving something in return. To obtain, something of equal value must be lost."

"Wow... That's amazing! Where did you come up with something so thought-provoking!?"

FullMetal Alchemist. "Well actually, I-"

"You have to write a paper on that! And I will be the first one to read it, proofread it and challenge it!"

I see I wasn't getting through on that subject. Okay, time to get to the brunt of things. "Can you draw circles on the ground and slam your hooves into it?"

Twilight raised an eyebrow in confusion. "Well... Yeah, but nothing would happen."

Fuck! So close... "Well I guess that kills plan-b." I mumbled out loud.

"What's plan-b?"

I started to think of a way to change the subject. Turning around and grabbing her waist, I smiled deviously as my fingers lightly pattered and brushed against her. "It's where I tickle you!"

"Stop! Gahaaahahaha! Quit it!"

I continued to make her laugh as she squirmed in place. "Make me."

Her magic surrounded my body and threw me against the sheets of the bed. She pursued me with hooves outstretched. As we both landed, she craned herself down to me, letting her lips come into contact with mine. Our kiss was slow yet simplistic, a peck on the lips that seemed to drag on for some time. After a few seconds, we broke contact to smile at each other. Instead of backing off, she pressed onward, climbing on top of me as she let one of her hooves wander down my chest. She stuck her tongue out at me, making fun of my being pinned down, to which my response was me flicking my tongue at hers. Eventually, we started to combat one another, our tongues as our weapons. Her lips soon joined the fray, clashing with mine. Quick breaths and the sounds of our lips separating from time to time filled the room.

We both halted our little war with each other, taking a frustrated exhale. Twilight climbed down from the bed and walked over to the center of the room.

"Come in." She called out.

The door opened, revealing a white pegasus guard with blue eyes. If it wasn't for the wings and the golden armor, then I would've had him confused with Twilight's older brother. "Princess, I was instructed to escort you to your chambers."

"No need. I already have one right here." She pointed to me as I walked beside her.

"But your brother has made it of utmost importance that you were to be escorted by a guard."

We both looked at each other dumbfoundedly before we started to giggle. "I'm an enlisted. Does that count?" I responded.

"But your brother-"

"Thank you for your concern. But I'm not ready to leave just yet." Twilight said as she started to tug on me, walking towards the bed again.

"Let me try." A second voice called out from behind the guard. Princess Cadance revealed herself to both me and Twilight.

"Cadance?"

"What's up, princess?"

The pink princess gave the guard a nod, dismissing him into the hall. "Unfortunately, your wake-up time is rather early. I would prefer that you bid your adieus now so that you can get some sleep, Nondis."

At that moment, reality had set back in. I was going to leave Ponyville first thing in the morning to travel to the camp. That also meant that this was my last night with Twilight before I headed out. I just wish we had more time to be with each other. At least I could've spent more recreational time with Twilight. "So I head out tomorrow, huh?"

"The carriage will be here long before the dawn. By then, you will be dropped off at the train station and sent off to join with the other recruits."

"Wow, that's a bit sudden, isn't it?" Twilight inquired.

"Shining, being a bit of a brute, decided to get him on the first train smoking. And that train is tomorrow morning. I tried to argue with next week, maybe even a few days on down, but he was so adamant on having him shipped out so soon."

Twilight scoffed at Cadance's confession. "What is up with him?"

"He's your brother. I'll have to deal with it." I said once more, trying to comfort her.

"Just let me know when he steps out of line. I'll deal with him as soon as possible." Cadance added, wanting to make sure that I was being treated fairly.

I nodded in appreciation. "Thanks."

Twilight magically dragged me back down to meet with her. Cadance blushed as she watched Twilight give me a quick peck on the lips. "Now, remember to write me a letter every week. Be sure that it comes by on every Tuesday because I might not have the time to read it on any other day."

"I'll try my best."

"Okay. Remember to stay quiet, remain calm, follow orders, look directly ahead and stay out of trouble."

"Got it."

"Okay. Now come back in one piece. I can't tear you apart if you're already in pieces."

Cadance started to voice her discomfort. "Twilight, I think he needs his rest now."

"Make me proud. That's your first order."

"Yes, your highness."

As Twilight kissed me one final time, Cadance started to pull her away. "Twilight, let's go!"

In quick succession, our kiss broke and the purple mare was dragged along by her older sister. "Bye." She whispered as she walked out the door along side Cadance. As the door closed, I was left standing in the center of the room, thinking about the hell I was going to endure when I had got off of the train in the morning.

And I started to think on who I was going to go through that hell for.

---

I was once again awoken by the sounds of a trumpet blaring in my ear and a guard shouting at me. Only this go round, I was more or less prepared for it. After that, I quickly took my shower, threw on my clothes and ran for the station. As the sun still hid below the horizon, I climbed aboard the train that would take me to my new home for the upcoming months.

As the train left the station, I could see the other young stallions and colts who were just as scared as I was. We were all told to remain silent for the duration of the ride. Many of those who started to drift asleep, myself included, found themselves being woken up by a guard screaming in our faces. And usually, when I would ride the train, I'd look out the window to appreciate the beauty. But even that was taken away. The windows were painted black to prevent us from looking out to see where we were going. Everything was made to put us on the edge of our seats. It goes without saying that the long, thirteen-hour train ride wasn't exactly a pleasure cruise.

Finally, we reached our destination. Most of us were ready to get off of that train. Others, were wanting to stay on in hopes of not having to face whatever drill instructor was going to scream and spit in their face. I already knew this wasn't going to be easy, but they could've at least made the train ride here a little more accommodating.

"ALRIGHT YOU PISSANTS! BEFORE YOU GET OFF THIS TRAIN, LET'S LAY DOWN SOME GROUND RULES! LINE YOUR ASSES UP! SHUT YOUR MOUTHS BEFORE WE SHOVE OUR HOOVES IN THEM! STAND AT ATTENTION AND DON'T YOU DARE EYEBALL ANY ONE OF YOUR INSTRUCTORS! DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR!?"

"SIR, YES SIR!"

"NOW WHEN YOU ARE CALLED, YOU HEAD TO YOUR ASSIGNED INSTRUCTORS! IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ANY OF WHAT IS GOING ON, THEN WALK YOUR ASS BACK WHERE YOU CAME FROM! DO YOU UNDERSTAND!?"

"SIR, YES SIR!"

I didn't know if I would want to walk from wherever we were now back to Ponyville. That seemed like a week's worth of travel in contrast to a thirteen-hour train ride. As soon as the train came to a screeching halt, I could see the instructor that previously yelled at me stand up at the front of the train cart.

"OFF THE TRAIN! OFF THE TRAIN! HUSTLE YOUR ASS! I WANNA SEE YOU RUN LIKE YOU'RE RUNNING DOWN FOR MOMMA'S HOT BUTTER BISCUTS!

I grabbed my belongings and ran in line after the few stallions in front of me. As we all started to line up, I could see well over the entire regiment. I know that in military, there is usually a sense of uniformity. I'm literally sticking out like a sore thumb. Even the few griffins I saw on the way in looked at me with confusion.

"YOU'RE AN UGLY SON OF A BITCH, YOU KNOW THAT!?"

One of the instructors walked up to me and screamed that to my face. I didn't want to seem like I was going to answer without being called on, so I just simply remained silent. "..."

"PRIVATE, I ASKED YOU A QUESTION, NOW ANSWER IT BEFORE I MAKE YOU DROP HERE AND NOW."

Nervously, I responded to him. "Sir, yes s-"

"DO YOU FUCKING HAVE A MOUSE IN THAT SHITTY LOG YOU CALL A NECK!? I CAN'T HEAR A DAMN THING!

"SIR, YES SIR!" I screamed to the top of my lungs.

"YOU LOOK LIKE A SACK OF SHIT! YOU LOOK LIKE A TALL, HAIRLESS, EVISCERATED GORILLA! I BET YOUR MOTHER WAS CONTEMPLATING SUICIDE AFTER SHE GAVE BIRTH TO YOU! ANSWER ME, PRIVATE! DOES IT HURT TO LIVE!?"

"SIR, NO SIR!"

"YOU LOOK LIKE YOU NEED A SPEAR CAREFULLY LODGED INTO YOUR BRAIN! I'D PUT YOU OUT OF YOUR MISERY IF IT WASN'T FOR THE FACT THAT YOU'RE ENLISTING! HELL, I MIGHT JUST DO THAT LATER TODAY!"

*snicker*

"DID I HEAR SOMEPONY LAUGH!? DID I HEAR ANYONE LAUGH IN MY FORMATION!?"

Whoever was the one that laughed at my expense, I had to thank them. The instructor's breath was unbelievably unbearable and he kept spitting in my face. If I wasn't following orders, I would wipe my face clean of the spit I was currently wearing.

"CHARLIE COMPANY, LINE UP AT THE DOOR!" Another guard shouted from the gates. As we stood in line, a guard walked up to me and pulled me out of line.

"Hold it a sec, greeny. Your name isn't on the roll for Charlie Company. You're in Delta."

I felt myself become uneasy over the suggestion that I was in another company. But then again, I was told that I was being assigned to Rainbow's company. So it's safe to say that I was going to easily be taken care of. I can already hear her screaming at my company.

"ARE YOU SERIOUSLY LOOKING AT ME!? I WILL FUCKING SHOVE MY HOOF SO FAR IN YOUR FACE THAT YOU WILL BE SEEING YOUR OWN REAR END! NOW STOP EYEBALLING ME, PRIVATE!"

Gotta admit, Rainbow Dash sounded really convincing for her role. Wait a minute? RAINBOW DASH?

"CHARLIE COMPANY! MOVE OUT!" Her voice called out once more. I snuck a look over to what was going on through the gates and saw Rainbow Dash marching off in front of a platoon of new recruits.

"DELTA COMPANY, LINE UP AT THE DOOR!" I heard one of the instructors yell out.

I was already not liking where this was going. This was already shaping up to be hell on earth. I got in line and waited for the line to move. Slowly but surely, we were brought into the camp. We stood at attention, waiting for our company commander to address us.

"WELL LOOKIT HERE! YOU FUCKERS GET THE HONOR OF KISSING MY WHITE, ROYAL ASS FOR THE NEXT TEN WEEKS!"

Oh. Please. God no.

"MY NAME IS SHINING ARMOR! I WILL BE YOUR INSTRUCTOR FOR THE TIME BEING! IF YOU INSIST ON BLOWING ME FOR THE NEXT TWO-AND-A-HALF MONTHS, THEN I SUGGEST YOU MASTER YOUR B-TO-BLOW SKILLS! OTHERWISE, I WILL BE WHIPPING YOU PUSSY-HOOF FUCKERS INTO SHAPE! THERE IS NO CRYING OUT FOR MOMMA IN MY COMPANY! IF YOU WANT YOUR MOMMA, THEN GUESS WHAT, I'M YOUR MOMMA! AND WHATEVER I SAY, GOES! SO THAT MEANS IF I TELL YOU TO GO JUMP OFF A TWELVE-STORY BUILDING, THEN YOUR RESPONSE SHOULD BE 'HOW HIGH DO I HAVE TO BOUNCE!' DO I MAKE MYSELF CLEAR!?"

"SIR, YE-"

"OH HOLD ON FOR A FUCKING MINUTE! IS THAT... IS THAT YOU, NONDIS?"

Just stay at attention. Just stay at attention. For the love of all that is holy just stay at attention. "..."

"ANSWER MY QUESTION, COCK-MUNCHER!"

I quietly stammered my response. "Y-y-yes sir..."

"WELL HELL, MY BIRTHDAY CAME TWICE THIS YEAR!" He shouted loudly in my ear to the entire company. He used his magic to yank me down towards him, whispering in my ear. "I am going to make sure that you fail. And if you die before you even fail... I will shit in your casket and you will wear it as a medal-of-honor."

He shoved me back into place before calling out to the company. "DELTA COMPANY! LET'S MOVE!"

As quickly as we were introduced, we ran right into business. Unfortunately for me, that running would require me to keep up with the group. And equines are twice as fast as humans in running. If there was a god, then he must enjoy my suffering.

In the words of Dante's Divine Comedy... Through me you pass into the city of woe. Through me you pass into eternal pain. Through me among the people lost for aye..

In short, all hope abandon ye who enter here.

Next Chapter: Chapter XVI Estimated time remaining: 140 Hours, 3 Minutes