Scootaloo was in her box eating one of those long doughnuts. Whatever they’re called. That was all fine ‘n’ dandy until Apple Bloom came from around the corner. It was a forty-five-degree turn, not ninety, but still a corner.

“Hey, Scootaloo,” Apple Bloom said.

“Fm, Vppm Bm,” Scootaloo said. She swallowed some doughnut. “What brings you here?”

“A love confession.”

“Oh fuck, don’t tell me you love Diamon—”

“Not Dahmond Tiara, you.”

“Well, duh, of cour—”

“No, lahke... in a romantic way.”

“Are you... are you serious? This isn’t some kind of a—”

Apple Bloom put a leg behind Scootaloo’s head and kissed her for e seconds.

“Apple Bloom...” Scootaloo said.

“Ah know, you prolly think Ah’m crazy or Ah’m still doin’ this on a bet or somethin’....”

“No, I... I love you too.”

“Really?! That’s great! In fact, it’s better than great, it’s grnine! You wanna have sex?”

“Only my whole life!”

A faint cardboard-crushing sound, like the sound one hears when crushing cardboard, was heard, and the box’s ceiling caved in slightly.

“Er, Scootaloo...” Apple Bloom said. “Ya might wanna come an’ see this....”

Scootaloo stepped outside the box. On top of it was an anvil labelled “TWO JILLION KILOGRAMS”.

“Well, it’s a good thing I had that cardboard to protect me,” Scootaloo said.

“Yeah... so, sex?”

“Sure. Um, what should we do?”

“Well, first, we should get in a less public place....”

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo ran away to the forest together. After ten minutes of looking for a decent clearing without banter, they found a lake. Most of said lake was bordered by densely-packed trees as if it was in a forest, but there was also a tiny beach. By “tiny”, I mean about five metres long and two wide, so tiny. Some might say that if it gets too small, it’s just some patch of sand and not a beach—a few grains of sand by a pond obviously wouldn’t count as a beach—but then it’d be like outer space or the number of items in a pile where you have to pick a completely arbitrary number, draw a line, and say “anything below this is nothing like a beach and anything equal to or greater than this automatically qualifies as a beach”, which in this case would probably be length or area. You’d probably have to set minimums for both length and width. Um, what was going on? Right, sex.

“Well, it’s not what we were imaginin’,” Apple Bloom said, “But it’s still clear ah trees.”

Rainbow Dash appeared from behind a tree. “I think it’s fine. I mean—”

“Rainbow Dash?!” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo said. “What are you doing here?!”

“AJ and I are having sex here.”

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo looked around a bunch of trees to see Applejack.

“But we were gonna have sex here,” Apple Bloom said.

“You’re finally together?!” Rainbow said. “Hey, AJ!”

Applejack came over there. “What?”

“Apple Bloom and Scootaloo are together!”

“Ah’m glad to see you’ve found an outlet that doesn’t involve makin’ Dahmond happy, Apple Bloom,” Applejack said. “An’ Ah’m glad to see you’ve found an outlet, Scootaloo.”

“Y’always say ‘bout how Ah’m ‘too young ta have sex’,” Apple Bloom said, “So Ah reckon if there ain’t a significant difference between the ages of mahself and Scootaloo, it’d be all good.”

“Too  young?”  Applejack  said.  “It’s  been  six  months  since  Ah  last  said  that,  you’re  just  fahne  now.”  She  laid  down  on  the  ground.  “C’mon,  eat  me  out.”

AppleBloomturnedtoScootaloo.”CanAhgoaheadorwouldyouthinkahthatascheatin’onyou?”

:Ur;a ijTM; aXIIRkii aUS, :u SIB;R NUBSM: AGW XIBRUBYWSM WCWB RGIYFG UR Qa vAUXkkt rgw aNW NWAAfw,

“Cool,” Apple Bloom said. She walked a short but unimpliable distance and started fun cunnilingus times.

“What am I gonna do now?” Rainbow said.

“What am I gonna do now?” said Scootaloo.

They looked towards each other.

“You’re hot,” Scootaloo said.

“You’re not too bad yourself.”

Rainbow leaned back against a tie-dyewood tree, legs outstretched and somewhat spread. Scootaloo started funnilingus times and Rainbow put a hoof on her head.

After a few mouth-wateringly delectalicious minutes of that, Twilight and Spike came to the scene, Spike on Twilight’s back.

“Um...” Twilight said.

“Hey, Twilight,” Rainbow said. “Scootaloo’s even worse at this than you are. Speakin’ of, how’s Apple Bloom, AJ?”

“She’s okay,” Applejack said. “Y’know, not good, not bad, maybe slahtly bad, but it’s still fun.”

“Twilight,” Spike said.

“What?”

“We should join the party!”

Spike hopped off Twilight, landing on his teeth. He was fine, though. Twilight picked a spot on the beach and laid down.

“Come on, Spike,” Twilight said.

“My teeth....”

“Come on, Spike.”

Spike came on over to Twilight, and thus began sex between a male and a female, just like Faust intended.

Twenty minutes into the future...

Appledash snogging was going on adjacent to the aforementioned tie-dyewood tree. On the beach, we had a >:) Apple Bloom being cunnilingised by a slightly distressed-looking Scootaloo. Twilight and Spike were idly lying on the beach, so don’t worry about them just yet. About whom you should worry were Rarity and Sweetie Belle, who arrived on the scene just now.

“What are Apple Bloom and Scootaloo doing?” Rarity said minusedly.

“It can’t be what it looks like,” Sweetie Belle said.

“It’s exactly lahke what it looks,” Apple Bloom said. “There’s still a li’l’ room left on the beach, so join the fun.”

“It can’t be what it looks like,” Sweetie Belle said. “What does it look like to you, Apple Bloom?”

“Ah just said, lahke Scootaloo’s eatin’ me out.”

Rarity was averting her eyes and trying to adjust to what she had just seen, but Sweetie Belle said more stuff:

“Is there anypony I can have sex with?”

“Twahlaht’s open. You fahne with havin’ sex with Sweetie Belle, Twahlaht?”

“Sure, to which I’d be happy.”

Sweetie Belle walked her way over to Twilight.

“So,” said Sweetie Belle said, “Should I just lie down and kind of put—”

“I’ll do you first, then you can try. You ready for your first sexual experience and probably your first orgasm?”

“Scootaloo seems like she was ready....”

“She hasn’t actually come yet,” Apple Bloom said. “She’s just been eatin’ ponies out the whole tahme.”

“Anyway,” Twilight said, “You ready?”

“I’m ready.”

Sweetie Belle didn’t know what to expect. She didn’t know what it was going to feel like. Well, she had a vague idea since she knew what sex was and stuff, but you know. Also, I just read over those two sentences again, and I’m making it sound like a bad thing. It totally wasn’t, though, it felt awesome. Genital stimulation and all that. Oh, Rarity looked back! Do you feel like saying something, Rarity?

“Does anypony want to have sex with me?” Rarity said. “Surely you do, Spike.”

“Can’t. I just fucked Twilight half an hour ago.”

“Okay, I understand that some ponies hate me,” Rarity said, “But do I need to have bad luck as well now?”

“Eeyup,” Spike said in a terrible Big Mac impression.

For Spike and Rarity, an awkward silence ensued. Luckily, it was stopped after a couple seconds by Apple Bloom.

“Scootaloo...” Apple Bloom said. “Ah’m... Ah’m... mmmmmmmmmn!” she said with exactly 9½ Ms as she came.

“Can I have a turn now?” Scootaloo said. Apple Bloom forced her head back down in response.

“Well, it looks like the shoe’s on the other foot!” Spike said.

All the characters except Scootaloo and Twilight laughed as an iris wipe zeroed in on a random tree, then closed.

That's all, folks! Next Chapter: Chapter 143: Appledash: The Reckoning Estimated time remaining: 3 Hours, 56 Minutes