The really grimdark is done now and I should be switching to humorous violence. I really wanted this story to focus on Dustin and Kay as they deal with their mental states and how they survive in this world. ~ Static.

"Did she really mean it?" I asked Kay.

"What?" she told me.

"Are we crazy. We have been on our own for years now accepting contracts and surviving but am I crazy?"

"Sure we're a little but after what we've seen who can blame you?"

"But we still have a purpose."

"Yes."

"Thank you then." We walked up a hill. Ponyville was in flames. Zombies are here now. On the other side of the hill was a large building with zombies spewing from it.

"Uh... Kay? What is that?"

"I don't know." The zombies didn't mind us. We just walked through the crowd without making a sound. Inside we saw tanks teleporting people from our world to here in zombie form.

"Who would do this?" whispered Kay.

"Let's find out." I whispered back. We climbed up the side of the building through and open window. When we were climbing up a pole from the top of the building fell off and smacked me in the back.

"Shit!" I barely hung on. The pole ripped the gun strap of my shotgun sending it plummeting to the sea.

"Hold on!" Kay grabbed my hand and pulled me up.

"Erg! Thanks."

"No prob." We got to the top where more lights were emitting. Inside I found a metal baseball bat. I put it on my Kevlar vest harness. I used my crowbar to open a door and inside their was another human.

"What? How did you find me!" He yelled hiding behind a desk.

"Relax. We're not her for a fight. Least not yet. Are you responsible for this?"

"I am Doctor Zephyr. What am I responsible for?"

"These zombies."

"No. They followed me."

"Their using teleporters at the bottom of this building and leave to eat flesh. Did you know that?"

"No."

"How did you get this building here?" asked Kay.

"What?"

"It says here Russian technology but were in Equestria."

"Equestria?"

"My little pony universe." I told him.

"Oh my... And the zombies are using my teleporters... and their eating My Little Ponies?"

"Just about. They payed us off to kill them all but it looks like we need to destroy this place."

"Let me come with you. I can be of great use." Kay and I got in the corner and started to whisper.

"Mad Russian doctor/ scientist." I said.

"Pro."

"Doesn't know what damage he's done."

"Con."

We looked back at him dancing in his happy place. There was a pink background and flowers and everything.

"He might be as crazy as us."

"Pro."

"He might snap and kill us all."

"Con." We both nodded.

"Alright Doctor Z. You comin' with us!" I told him.

"Oh thank you my dear chap."

"You speak wonderful English." said Kay.

"I actually took the time to learn this language. Glad it payed off." he said. He looked like a good Dr. Wily except with a cool Old Snake mustache and his hair was straight except the bald spot on his head. I handed him by .32 and gave him 5 speed loaders.

"Here. Make them count. Listen. Shoot only if necessary. Sound attracts 'Them' understand?"

"Yes Mr..."

"I'm Dustin. This is Kay."

"Nice to meet you." I was looking at her chest. When she noticed she gave us both a smack. "Hey you don't have to stare." She turned away to hide her blush.

"Your hitting that?" Dr. Z said.

"Just about." I said with a smile while in my happy place. We all heard a zombie hit the metal door. I pulled out my bat and she pulled out her sword.

"Stay back Doctor." she said.

"Yes." He got behind his desk. The door opened and we both charged them and began to take them out. I jumped up bringing down my bat like it was god's fist cracking open the skull of this zombie killing it instantly. Kay jumped through the crowd and cut 8 of 'them' 's heads off. I took on the last three smashing 2 and hitting one out a window.

"You two make a wonderful team." Said the doctor.

"Do you know how to use that?" I asked him as he held the gun in his hands.

"Yes just point and shoot!" He said in his happy voice aiming at me.

"WHOA! WHOA! WHOA! STOP!" I couldn't move. My legs wouldn't let me.

"Sorry." he said lowering it.

"It's okay." said Kay.

"Let's go before I really piss myself." I almost did right there. We made our way to the elevator and took it down to the lab.

'Do do do do Da La laaa la la! Do do do.' We all stayed quiet.

"Someone kill that noise!" I yelled. Kay pulled her .357 and shot the speaker. "Thank you."

"Nice Stetson." said the doctor. I looked at him in a serious look and then smiled and gave him a thumbs up.

The door opened and all the zombies were outside.

"You two go clean house." I told them. The doctor ran with Kay and soon shots were heard. I ran to the transporter.

"Always wanted to do this." I raised up my bat.

Outside

Kay's POV

*BAM BAM BAM BIFF BAM BIFF BAM BAM BAM* was what I was heard from inside.

"What's he doing to my beautiful inventions!" said the Doctor in tears.

"He's having a field day Dr. Z." I told him. I raised my rifle and shot through 8 of them. All the zombies from around us came hobbling to us. There was only about 23 left.

"Can you help Ms. Kay?" He said. His gun ran out of ammo.

"Stupid Dustin and his 5 shooter. Push the button on the side." He did as was told and the gun barrel lowered.

"Now pump the empty rounds out and take one of the speed loaders." He emptied it and grabbed one of the loaders.

"Slide the bullets in place and push them in." I pushed on it with his fingers. He closed the gun and pulled the hammer down.

"Thank you."

"Welcome." I pulled my .357 and killed two of them behind him. He did the same but took down 3.

"Consider us even." Dustin came out.

"Finished!" He pulled his crowbar out and dual wielded that with his bat. He jumped into the remaining 18 off 'them' and quickly disposed of them.

"You do better up close and personal." I told him.

"I was just thinking that." The last one crawled towards him. He walked over to and raised his boot. "Fuck off." He said while curb stomping it.

"Wonderful, just wonderful!" said Dr. Z. He ran up to give us a hug. He just wanted to bury his face in my chest. "Come on!" I gave him a smack and Dustin one too.

"Why?" he said.

"For protective measures." Dustin busted out laughing. Zephyr soon followed his lead and I ended up giggling myself. We looked around us.

"We're a mess aren't we?" said Dustin.

"Yeah. But nothing we can't handle." I said.

"Do you want to stick with us Doc?" said Dustin.

"Of course."

"First some rules." I told him. "Number 1. Don't harass me. Number 2. We ration our food. Number 3. We need to teach you some magic."

"For what?"

"So we can disguise ourselves in this world as ponies." said Dustin.

"And we can use magic?"

"In this world yes." I said.

"Wonderful." We all got up and walked back to Ponyville. In town everything seemed like nothing happened. We pulled out our binoculars and saw the town was repopulated. We used our magic to turn into ponies. Dustin looked different now. He still had his brown duster but was more tan than orange. His hair was long spiked brown.

"You varmint!" yelled an orange cowpony who tackled him down.

"You the one who stole mah hat!"

"I didn't steal. I looted." said Dustin with a smile.

"Same thing." She walked away. He got up and just gave us a shrugged. Zephyr was a grey unicorn with similar hair and a mustache. He had a white labcoat on.

"Great Scott!" he yelled. I couldn't help but giggle.

"What?" he asked.

"You remind us of the doc from Back to the Future." said Dustin holding his laughter in. We walked around town. No one seemed to recognize us. No one cared about the heavily armed unicorns walking through town. But then Dustin stopped. He saw Twilight talking to an orange pony with a black jumpsuit on.

"I love you Static." she said.

"I love you Twilight." he said bringing her in for a kiss. We all just watched.

"Don't do it man!" yelled Dustin. Static gave him a confused look and yelled "Fuck you!"

"No thank you!" yelled Dustin. The Doc was laughing. I stood by his side.

"Are you two new in town?" said Twilight.

"Cute couple." said Static. We both looked at each other with large eyes and turned our heads away. They both laughed and walked away.

"Dustin are you okay?" He ran ahead to look around. Everything was back to normal. No bloodstains. No corpses. Nothing.

"WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING OOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!" yelled Dustin. Everyone could hear him.

Mean while in Appleloosa

The ponies were doing their normal routine of chores and jobs. Everyone was enjoying some apple pie as well then a sound broke the air.

'WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING OOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!' We all looked around in fear.

In Canterlot

"Be careful Luna." said Celestia. I was working on a ship in a bottle.

'WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING OOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!' Was what I heard pierce the air. I dropped by bottled ship.

"OOOHHH! WHAT MATTER OF TREACHERY IS THIS!" I yelled in my Royal Canterlot voice.

"Dustin's back." said Celestia.

Ponyville

"OOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNN!" Dustin kept yelling. He fell to his back knees.

"Better?" I asked him

"Much." He had a smile. He was holding in a lot of anger I guess.

"Really?" we heard from behind.

"Tia stop fucking sneaking up on us." Dustin said.

"We'll I guess you... three. Did it. Zephyr your new but I recommend you keep these kid's together."

"Uh... Yes ma'am?"

"In case your wandering I am Princess Celestia."

"YES MA'AM!" Z said realizing he was speaking to authority.

"Here is what I promised." She handed us a bag. Inside it was 4 million bits and a document protecting us from any politics. We could handle a few mercs.

"Celestia can you explain what's happening?" asked Kay.

"You see Kronor. The timeline has been properly set. You two stopped the transporters and sent us all in a paradox. That's why you see Static over there hitting on my student."

"But I... But Spike was dating her... Now me... not me... ERG!" said Dustin. "I'm too confused."

"Too put it in dumb for you there are two of you know Dustin."

"I see. And will my friends recognize me?" I asked.

"I'm sorry to say this Kay but no."

"Oh..." I lowered my head.

"I got you three a loft in Canterlot. You wanted a decent place so I gave you a great place to live."

"Thank you." said Zephyr.

"We need to spend some time here Celestia." Dustin said.

"I understand. Don't fight yourself Dustin. I mean don't fight Static."

"I'm not. I can even remember how to use that magic."

"Your not him and he's not you." She said.

"What about Brave Heart." He asked.

"She's not here yet." said Celestia. I remained quiet. I had no words on my mind to say.

"Then let's end this little road trip..." said Dustin. "... with a fucking bang!"

This is the end of ACT 1. I have more randomness on its way. ACT 2 will begin shortly. ~ Static.