"You are Malideus, then? I'm going to make you..." Cadence does not finish before I interrupt her.

"Blah, blah, revenge, gonna make you pay, got a bone to pick with me, I've heard this speech a thousand times." I say irritably.

"How dare you! You dare mock me after all you've done?" Cadence says, trembling with anger.

"Yes, I 'mock you after all I've done'. Now, are you gonna sit there and sputter, or are you gonna come at me, ho?" I say, getting into a stereotypical kung-fu stance.

"... No. I will not 'come at you'." She says, inciting a reaction from me:

"Whaaaaaat!?" I ask, dumbstruck.

"I will not fight you. I think, maybe, that there may be a deeper reason to your actions. If you will allow me to see what they are, maybe you can stop all the hate?" She says, putting a hand on my shoulder. Mizzietta gags, but I stand there, confused. No revenge? No killing? This was blasphemy! This was madness!

"I don't... What is the meaning of this!?" I yell, pushing Cadence away.

"I know what lies in your heart, Malideus. You entered our world with a false name and the intention to destroy us, but why? I see much loneliness within you, Malideus. Tell me your secrets, so that I can..." She doesn't finish before I raise my righteous pimp-hand, and then slap the ever-loving crap out of her bitch mouth, tears in my eyes.

"You can't stop me with your lies! I'm not good inside, I'm not misunderstood, I'm not repressing anything! STOP TRYING TO CHANGE ME!!!" I yell at the top of my lungs, shaking the castle with the volume of my voice. Then, Cadence gets up, a look of shock on her face.

"You cannot change me, 'princess'. I will not be a part of your sick, twisted world!" I finish, holding the crystal heart up.

"You... You can't do that!" She cries, moving to stop me. However, Mizzietta gets in the way.

"I can't, can I? what if I did... this?" I ask, putting my hand to the heart. Suddenly, a feel a small surge, like electricity going up my arm, and the crystal heart darkens in places, splotches and waves of black move across it like clouds, until there is no more light, just a black, obsidian heart.

"You...What have you done!? Without the crystal heart, we are nothing!" Cadence says, tears flowing from her eyes.

"I can see that. I, however, am far from powerless. Behold, the obsidian heart!" I shout, holding the corrupted heart up for all to see. Soon, crystal ponies rush in, and they begin to murmur and cry in dismay at the spectacle before them.

"You have not won yet, Malideus! The surface may be tainted by your evil, but the core remains pure! You are not powerful enough to corrupt it all!" Cadence exclaims, and everyone cries out in agreement. I, though, just look around at them, and wonder why that is so. If I was told correctly, the heart would be corrupted by my evil. So why was it not sopping with it? Was I... heaven forbid... not evil enough?

"I don't... understand... I say, and the crystal heart returns to it's pristine, clear form, free of corruption.

"Face it, Malideus. You may think that you are bad, but you're not. Stop trying to be evil, and just be good, as is your true self." Cadence said, and I felt the worst bout of rage I had ever felt boil up inside me, and my right hand began to crackle with electric fury, my hate coursing through my veins.

"NO!!!" I shout, and I throw Cadence aside, and pick up the crystal heart.

"Come on, Mizzietta! I need to leave, before my blood pressure kills me!" I say, and Mizzy returns to her normal size, and I get on her back. Then, we charge through the crowd, and take off. As we fly back to the cave, crystal heart in tow, Mizzy gets curious.

"You don't actually believe her, do you?" she asks.

"Of course not. I am Malideus, destroyer of worlds!" I say, with no doubt of my alignment. I ended many lives before now, and ruined more! I'm not good, I'm far from it! Yet, Cadence's words eat away at me, nagging at my mind. If I'm evil, then why couldn't I corrupt the heart? I ponder this, looking at the heart. The sight of it fills me with anger, so I lower it, but I do not let go. This thing is my key to ultimate power, and I won't let go for anything.

Finally, we arrive at the cave. Mizzietta sets down, and I get off, feeling really sick to my stomach. I hate moral dilemmas.

"Hey, Mal, are you okay?" Mizzy asks, and I take off my helmet, putting on my best smile.

"Of course! It's not like my entire identity is in question or anything, I'm sure I'll be fine." I say, putting my helmet on the ground.

"Hey, when's your uncle supposed to get her, anyway?" I ask.

"He should be here, right about... Now." She says, and as soon as the word "now" leaves her mouth, the earth rumbles, the skies turn black, and a great, big, blue, electrical portal appears in a deafening explosion, and I scramble to put my helmet back on before it gets sucked into the crazy thing. Then, a mighty, eldritch roar explodes from the portal, and something slithers out: Something colossal, snake-like, armored and golden, with two curved horns with an oval floating between them, and I recognized the colossal, evil-looking dragon immediately.

"Oh my god, your uncle... he's..." I say, unable to finish.

"Yep! Malideus, meet my uncle Nicol Bolas!" She says, and I almost faint. Bolas, however, pays me no mind, and focuses on his niece, Mizzietta. Immediately, the two collide in a heart-warming embrace, and I begin to feel better about my chances of surviving.

"Uncle Bolas!" Mizzy cries as she embraces her eldritch uncle, and he returns the hug.

"Mizzy! My word, you get bigger every time I visit! A thousand years is longer than I thought!" Bolas says in a voice that's so deep and rumbling, it sound more like a volcano, but he still squeezes his niece.

"Uncle, please! It's only been 715 years!" Mizzy says, and the two break the hug-fest up.

" I know, but I still will always think you my little fallen angel, Mizzy!" Bolas says, rubbing Mizzy's head.

"I know... Oh, uncle, I just remembered! I have someone I want you to meet!" Mizzietta says, perking up.

"What? Well, it's about time you got yourself a mate. Speak then, who is it?" Bolas says, smiling. Immediately, Mizzy picks me up (which I still hate) and hold me up, showing me off like some kind of trophy.

"Uncle, this is my new, eh, companion, Malideus!" She says, but I remain silent as Nicol Bolas inspects me, a look of disinterest on his face. Then, he casts the same look at his niece.

"I'm sure this is some kind of funny joke, but I'm not getting the humor. Could you explain it to me?" Bolas says, causing me no end of embarrassment, on top of my fear that he's going to destroy me at any second.

"No joke, uncle. Malideus has just been dying to meet you! He wants to be as great and powerful as you, so he can break this world in half! Right, Malideus?" Mizzy asks, and I gulp.

"W-well, dying isn't the word I'd use, exactly..." I say, trying not to wet myself.

"Hmm... I do like his getup... What is his power, as of now?" Bolas asks, eyeing me suspiciously.

"Oh, he's great! he can talk his way out of anything, he's a... uh... Geomancer, yeah! He can blind people with sand, and he single-handedly stole the crystal heart!" Mizzy explained, and I just smiled, even though I was wearing a helmet.

"Hmm... Interesting... A geomancer, you say? And able to talk and sneak his way out of anything? Not the usual combination, but interesting enough... Though I do not see what you see in him." Bolas said, scratching his chin.

"Well, that's kinda it. Malideus kinda lost his powers a while ago, and I was hoping you could give him some? Please?" Mizzietta asks, activating her best puppy eyes. Bolas seems immune at first, but then wavers.

"Guh, Oh, all right, I'll see what I can do. But only because you're my favorite niece." he says, pinching Mizzietta's cheek.

"Aww, Thank you, uncle Bolas!" Mizzy says, hugging him.

"Anything for my Mizzy-kins. Now, you are Malideus?" Bolas says, looking at me. I was so scared right there, I come pretty close to releasing my bowels, thank god I didn't.

"Uhh... yes...sir?" I reply, shaking like a leaf.

"I see. Well, from what I can tell, you have no magic, almost no mass, muscle, fat or anything else, and no money or wealth of any kind. Honestly, I will never see why my niece even laid eyes on you, much less mated with you." Bolas says, and I suddenly get a horrible sinking feeling.

"H-how..?" is all I can muster.

"I know everything, that's how. Thankfully for you, you both are incompatible to sire a child, so while I'm not happy with either of you..." Bolas says, eyeing Mizzy suspiciously. "... I am not furious, either. Nonetheless, I will help you, boy. Now, I can grant you power, but you are too young to truly wield it. If you seek my blessing, boy, then you must train." Bolas finishes.

"Train?" I ask, quite unsatisfied.

"Yes, train. I'm sick of teenagers, and their need for instant gratification. Back in my day, if we wanted to send something, we wrote it down, double checked it, and payed a carrier! Now, you kids have your "cell phones", and your "computers" and various other doohickeys. Well, I'm glad to say that, as of now, you're going to be a wizard the old-fashioned way." Bolas says, and I groan.

"Ugh, do I have to?" I ask.

"If you want my power, yes. Now, I'm going to have you undergo a series of tests. Complete them all, and I grant you my blessing. Fail, and I will destroy you for fooling around with my niece." Bolas says, and I gulp.

"Uncle!" Mizzy says, and Bolas sighs.

"Fine, maybe not destroy. But I will make you suffer. Now, let us begin." Bolas says, and thus begins my five agonizing days of training and tests, which I'm pretty sure were just for his amusement. The first day, I had to run from the cave, to the other side of the forest, then run back. So, in the beginning of the morning, I began my trek, after the old fart throws me outside. Nevertheless, it was easy enough halfway through, but three days of running in the woods was all I could muster before my natural strength reserves crapped out. I tried to reach the end as fast as I could by walking, limping, but I ended up crawling, and the entire incursion took about a week. God, I'm out of shape. Finally, after about a week and a half, I make it back to the cave, and Bolas seems surprised I even survived.

"Well, it seems I owe Nefarox quite a hefty sum. I was certain you'd perish." Nicol Bolas says, sipping at his coffee.

"You said he'd be fine!" Mizzy cries.

"I did? Eh, lapse in grammar." Bolas says, shrugging.

The next day, my next test began.

"Alright, boy, Time for the next test. I've been seeing a lot of cockatrices around here, and it's been years since I've had one. Unfortunately, I don't like hunting, so you're going to be doing that for me." Bolas says simply, and I almost go ballistic.

"You're sending me out there to bring you groceries!? You are the worst coach ever!!!" I yell, but Bolas just laughs.

"I never said I was a good one. Now go kill some birds, boy." He says, pointing to the forest. So, I go out, and fifteen close calls and a whole mess of scratches and bruises later, I return. However, Nicol Bolas laughs at me.

"Well, you've certainly taken your sweet time. I could have conquered a plane in the time you took to fetch those glorified chickens! Nonetheless, I guess you did it without dying." He says, and I growl.

"Damn right, I did. Now, can I have some powers?" I ask, and Bolas laughs even harder. Seriously, this guy is an asshole. But nonetheless, I finished the test, and he gave me a new one the next day.

The new test, he said, was to climb the mountain in my underwear. I'm almost fed up with this, let me tell you. I hunted, ran, and got laughed at for two weeks. TWO. FUCKING. WEEKS. But Mizzy says her uncle knows what he's doing, so I'm forced to do his bidding. So, early in the morning, I begin toclimb the fucking mountain in my underpants. Meanwhile, Bolas is taunting me from the top, and laughing his ass off.

"You'd best hurry, Malideus, the mountain only gets colder at night." He taunts, and I'd throw a punch right back, if I wasn't freezing my nuts off. I continue nonetheless, and when I reach half way, that asshole creates a fucking blizzard!

"WHAT THE HELL, YOU OLD FART!?" I yell at the top of my lungs, and Nicol Bolas harrumphs.

"I'm not that old! Besides, it's just a blizzard! Surely one as great and powerful as you has powered through worse?" He taunts, and then intensifies the blizzard out of spite. I almost died on this one, leading me to believe that this dragon was trying to kill me. However, I am no wuss. I despise this old dragon so much, I do as I am told, and I'm up and down by the end of the day. This time, I'm the one who laughs at the surprise on Nicol Bolas's face.

"Ha! Eat it, Bolas! You ain't got nuthin on this!" I say, hitting my chest for emphasis. Bolas though, glares daggers at me, and I fear I may have overstepped my boundaries. Contrary to my fears, though, he just laughs.

"You did good, boy. You take too long to accomplish such simple tasks, but at least you do them thoroughly. Ah, well, we'll see what I have for you tomorrow." He says, letting me live another day. However, I should have known that he'd have one last test for me, in the end. I know this is out of spite, but I do it anyway. However, I really wish I hadn't.

"Oh, come on..." I say as I carry the colossal old dragon all the way to Ponyville in a magical blizzard he created.

"Wanted power, you did. Now pay, you must, for cheap, my blessing is not." Bolas said, and I almost dropped him.

"Why...Are you... Uhn... Talking... Like that..?" I ask, strained by the weight of a colossal elder dragon on my back.

"Need a reason, I do not. This task, you must complete. Now walk, boy." Bolas says, pointing toward the town. I know he's using magic to make himself lighter, but that still did not help the fact that I was going to have back problems from this... if I survived, that is. So, I walked on for hours, trudging through magical snow and wind, but thankfully, my robes were pretty damn warm, so I survived the cold, but this dragon's weight was what I felt was going to kill me. Finally, after a whole twelve hours, we reach the outskirts of Ponyville, and Bolas stops me, letting the blizzard up. Then he gets off me, and smiles.

"Well, boy, I didn't expect you to survive these past few days. You have done well." He says, but I'm too exhausted to reply, so I just give a thumbs-up.

"Yes, you have completed all tasks I have for you... but one." He says, and I go ballistic.

"WHAAAAT!?!?" I yell, ready to explode.

"Yes, there is one more, but it is to test your powers finally, whereas the others were for my own amusement." He explains, and I listen, despite my urge to shout 'I knew it!'.

"What... Is it..?" I pant, ready to pass out. Suddenly, Bolas snapped his fingers, and my robes were fixed, my armor was polished, and I felt... weird, like when I had the Alicorn amulet, but much less so.

"I have given you power, Malideus. But now, I need you to test your powers." he says, and we're suddenly back at the cave, and Mizzy is waiting.

"Mal! You're back! So, how was it? You look... better." She says, eyeing me uncomfortably. Nonetheless, I respond with confidence:

"I'm fine, you know, besides the fact I had to climb a mountain, strangle cockatrices, and carry your uncle five miles to obtain this power." I say, and she just rubs my head.

"That'd explain it." she says, and Nicol Bolas speaks up.

"Yes, your... questionable boyfriend... now has the power he seeks, but he requires one more test to truly make sure he can learn this magic. Now, boy, bring me the crystal heart." Bolas says, and I do so.

"Now... touch the heart, and absorb its power. If you are capable of this, then I see no reason to test or train you further." Bolas explains, and I cringe as all eyes are on me. I look at the heart, and think back to when I first tried corrupting it. I feel like I can't, but I also don't really want to. I can't explain it, but the heart makes me feel... weird, Like I can't even look at it, lest I harm it with my very gaze. Nonetheless, I try again, and the effect is so different from last time, it scares me: The heart's light dims, then the heart starts to shake. I get scared, but I press on, holding my hand to the heart, feeling its power course through me.

"And this is going to corrupt it, right?" I ask, and Nicol Bolas just laughs, a deep, booming sound.

"Yes, something like that." He says, and I shrug and press on. By now, the heart has dimmed to near- black, and a red light is pulsing from its center. I keep holding, and the light grows brighter and bigger, until it engulfs the whole heart. then, before I can ask if I'm done, the heart explodes, sending crystalline shards everywhere and startling Mizzy and I.

"Bwoah, shit!!!" I cry, falling on my ass. a second passes, and a shard hits my head, bounces, and lands in my hand. I look at the blood-red shard, and look around, then at Nicol Bolas, who was smiling.

"What just happened?" I brilliantly asked.

"You, my boy, have just absorbed the crystal heart. It had no use for it's previous form, so it was destroyed. You see, Malideus, you just committed the ultimate act of corruption. And now, all that raw power is yours." Bolas explained.

"Cooool..." Mizzietta said, looking at a larger, blood-red shard.

"Well, yeah, but... did I have to destroy it?" I ask with a twinge of unease for destroying the crystal heart.

"No, but why risk having someone purify it? That's the first step toward ultimate power: if presented with the option, always destroy something after you've taken what you need from it. That way, no one can take it back." Bolas explains.

"Oh..." I say, looking at the shard in my hand, still blood-red, as if that was to always be its color.

"I think that's pretty cool. I mean, imagine if you can do this to other stuff!" Mizzietta says, causing me to feel a little better about it. I mean, it was pretty cool.

"Yes, and now, I have given you your gift. What you do with it is your decision. Well, I must go, universes simply do not destroy and enslave themselves." Bolas says, and he and his niece embrace once again.

"Oh, thank you uncle!" Mizzy cries, and Bolas laughs.

"It was no trouble, dear niece. I just hope that next time, you don't have me train any more of your boyfriends. Yours isn't exactly the fastest I've ever seen, even for a 'geomancer'." Bolas says jokingly. Then, after goodbyes, he opens a portal and leaves, shutting the portal behind him.

"I don't like your uncle." I say finally.

"Oh, don't be like that. He did give you powers, after all!" Mizzy replies.

"Yeah, minute ones." I say. Mizzy just sighs.

"Nothing pleases you anymore, doesn't it?" she asks.

"Not since the amulet." I reply. However, Mizzietta just smiles, and kisses me, which I'm still not used to.

"So, wanna train your new powers, O great Malideus?" Mizzy asks sultrily.

"Yeah, it's about time I paid Twilight back for breaking my, er, your amulet." I say, and Mizzy laughs.

"Need a ride?" She asks.

"Nah, I got this." I say, walking out of the cave.

"Well, don't get killed out there. I might get lonely." Mizzy said sultrily, eyeing me uncomfortably.

"Really? Your uncle just left." I say irritably.

"Yeah, and now he's gone. Just come back at a reasonable time, please?" Mizzy asks.

"Alright, I'll be back." I say, and I'm off. I feel good, so I run, all the way out of the forest. In fact, I feel better than when Bolas gave me that power. Could the heart have been a part of this? Eh, no matter, I didn't need to know. What I did need is to get to that fucking village and make that town my bitch.

"Look out, Twilight, here comes Malideus." I say, prepared to end her and her friends once and for all.

Author's Notes:

'Twas a sappy chapter, but it had to be done. Sorry if it sucked, folks, but every chapter after this one, I assure you, will contain more evil hilarity than you can handle!