The town looms in the distance as I walk forward, as if in a trance. However, a recurring thought enters my head as I walk: Cadence. I remember how she tried to reach out to me, and I fill with anger each time I think. I hate them, I hate her, but why? I remember back to when I corrupted the crystal heart: The first time, I only sought to corrupt it, but I could not. Then, when I destroyed it... That was not corruption, it was absorption. I wanted to corrupt it, not get rid of it. Corruption, by definition, is forcing one's evil into something, but I couldn't do that. So, here I am, actually thinking about my alignment. I want to be the evil of this world, just to snap it out of it's lazy, self-indulgent lifestyle. Yet, I can't even corrupt the single most emotion-sensitive artifact in this whole world, and I resort to taking it's power. Is that really my brand of evil? Now that I'm on this topic, am I really even as evil as I say? I sometimes wish autopilot would come back sometimes, because I liked not making decisions for myself.

I think on this for a while, but then stop as I find myself on the edge of Ponyville. I stare as the ponies go on with their lives, and I see that they seem just like humans, albeit distorted. I seem to have forgotten that somewhere... but where? Anyway, I'm tempted to turn and walk away, but something keeps me on my path. I hate these creatures, but I grow tired of fighting them. It's just stale now. But, I feel like I should at least finish what I've started. So, I walk up to the town, as the sky starts to drizzle. As soon as I'm in sight, everyone starts to flee, but stops when they see the Mane Six walk up, going right for me. I make no move, though, and just stand there, my internal turmoil paralyzing me. Soon, Twilight is right in front of me, fathomless hatred in her eyes.

"You have a lot of nerve showing up back here." She says, eyeing me with utmost contempt. However, I do nothing, only reply.

"I suppose I do. You, in turn, have a lot of nerve getting in my face after all you've put me through." I say, crossing my arms.

"What!? You're the one who decided to start causing trouble the minute you got here!" Twilight shouts, her face turning red.

"I know. But you are the ones who need cleansing. You exist under a false sky and a bastard sun, with no real hardships to speak of. And so, I have come to end that. I will end this little hell you've cooked up, and spare the rest of us your bullshit. So I say, Princess, that I do not want your speeches, or your rehabilitation; I want your blood." I say, but then I ask: Do I, really?

"We don't need to be cleansed! We were fine without you! Now, you've caused too much damage to let you go this time. No more hostages. We've all agreed, and we will take you, dead or alive, no matter who you put in front of you. Now, accept your fate like a stallion, or die like a coward." Twilight says, and I feel like I should just give up. But my majority says to fight on, so I do.

"I will not be taken anywhere, Twilight. No, I think that it is I who will win." I say, flustering the Mane Six. Then, I flick my hands, causing flames to appear in them.

"What do you have now, some new toy? You can't even use magic otherwise. How are we supposed to take this seriously?" Rainbow Dash asks, and I chuckle.

"So naive. Do you think that, just because I have no horn upon my head, that I cannot use magic? Allow me to end your petty delusions." I say, and I raise my hand forward, casting a rather large bolt of fire at the group. Twilight tries to dispel it, but I snap my fingers, and the bolt splits in half, goes around her, and the twin bolts hits Rainbow Dash and Applejack simultaneously, knocking them down. Then, while Twilight is disoriented, I run up, grasp her throat, and throw her into her remaining friends.

"I still have power, more so than you. You have set me back and infuriated me to no end, though, and now shall suffer. I'm going to destroy each and every one of you, one by one, and I'm going to piss on your ashes." I say, moving forward. However, the six get up, and charge me. They then tackle me, and I let my instincts kick in. Without thinking, I cross my arms, close my eyes, and I feel like I'm somewhere else. Sure enough, as soon as I open my eyes, I'm three feet away from the confused mares. I just teleported! However, my victory is cut short when the six get up and try to repeat the process. So, I repeat whatever I did back the first time, and I teleport again... six feet into the air.

As I'm falling, Rainbow dash zooms to catch me, but as soon as she grabs my robes, I grab her hand and loose a shock wave into her, stunning her and making her let me go. Thankfully, the fall isn't that far, and I get up just fine. However, Twilight has had enough, and tries to cast a force field spell around me, and I'm caught. But, I still do not give up. I punch and scratch and zap the shield, until it finally gives way. Then, I chain lightning Twilight and her friends, causing them to slump and fall down, stunned. Honestly, I expected a bigger fight from the six, but I suppose now that they are just really weak. Nonetheless, Twilight gets up, and her friends follow. I'll admit, they are NOT strong, but they can sure take a beating.

I get into my stance once more, and the six , ever the heroes, pull some pretty complex combos: Twilight casts a light spell that blinds me, while Fluttershy and Pinkie jump onto my back, causing me to lose balance. I flail and toss, but ultimately fall backwards, crushing them, but still become immobile myself. Then, Applejack grabs me, and throws me to Rainbow, who jumps and puts both feet out to kick me, and I stop there. Just when I think that they're finished, though, Twilight picks me up with her magic, and throws me into a building.

Now, let's face it: I'm in a mess. I'm blinded by the dust, it's lightly raining, and I'm in serious pain. But I carried Bolas five miles, climbed a mountain in my underwear and strangled fifteen cockatrices, so I find the strength to power through. Having had enough of these interlopers, I pull all my magic together for a last, stamina-destroying move: I finally use all my powers to make a giant shell of stone and debris around me, and float up into the air with it, creating two "fists" out of similar materials, and the six stare like it's the first time they've seen anyone do this. Amateurs.

Anyway, so I create my floating armor, and Twilight casts a spell that destroys half of it, but I use my magic to gather more surrounding stones and debris to regenerate it, and then I sweep one of my "fists" into the six, throwing them aside like dolls. Then, they get up, and start to complain about how unfairly I was playing. Really, you play six against one, and when I use armor, you say I play unfair? Not cool. Anyways, I then throw another fist at them, causing them to scatter, and proceed to whack each one into the ground like Whack-a-mole until they're all buried to their necks.

Unfortunately, my mana reserves gave out after that, and my construct fell into rubble, and I had to dig my way out of it. Even worse, the mane six managed to pry themselves out of the ground, but none of them looked in any condition to keep fighting, and neither was I. The six try to charge me again, but I resort to my skills, and just whack them with a long board of wood, seeing as how I'm too tired to do anything magical. So they stay down, but I fall down to my knees as well, officially done with this fight. So, we lay there in the mud, too tired to move, so we resort to insults to finish our fight.

"I wish... you never came here... you jerk..." Twilight pants.

"Me... too..." I reply, unable to feel anything but pain. Suddenly, I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to go and sleep for a few weeks. Weakly, I get up, and try to stumble off, hoping I don't die from exhaustion on my way to my cave.

"Where are you going... you coward..?" Rainbow Dash calls, but I just flip her the bird as I trudge a few feet, but I cannot go any farther, and I drop to my knees, and begin to black out. My last thought before I go out is why I ever decided that that last move was a good Idea, and then I'm out. When I wake up, I find myself strapped to a chair, in what appears a laboratory. Thankfully, my helmet is still on, so my irrational fear of having it off in public is kept at bay. I don't know why I don't want it off, I just do, and I don't argue it. However, I feel like I should find an escape soon, so I look around the room.

The room itself scares me, because it's all full of odd, flashing machines and Tesla coils, and I don't really like electricity that much. I struggle in my chair for a bit, but I soon find it hopeless.

"Ugh... I hate my life..." I say, exhausted. Suddenly, the door opens, and someone steps down the stairs: Twilight Sparkle, my most hated nemesis.

"You! Release me now, or suffer the consequences!" I snarl, struggling even harder, almost tipping the chair over.

"I think not. Here, you can't hurt anyone. Besides, how else am I going to conduct painful, life-threatening experiments on you?" Twilight asks, circling my chair.

"I will kill you all! I will burn your husk to a crisp, and devour your soul!" I yell, still trying to escape.

"Nah, I prefer you like this. Much easier to keep track of. Besides, we haven't even seen your real face!" Twilight says, stopping in front of me. Then, I realized my predicament.

"No! Stop right there, or I'll destroy you! I'll blow you up into little bloody giblets, you hear me!? You stay the fuck away from me, you little bitch!" I scream, thrashing wildly. Oh, did I mention I hate bondage? It's a long-standing phobia of mine.

"Relax, Malideus, Celestia herself already called dibs on unmasking you. I won't do anything... if you're good." She says, and I realize what's going on here. I'm expected to be some kind of toy while I await my final punishment.

"What do you want of me, whore?" I ask, extremely pissed at the universe for doing this to me.

"Me? I want to make you pay for everything you've ever done to each of us, and so do the other five. And we each get a turn." Twilight says, getting really close to my face. I want to headbutt her, but that would be futile, and likely only worsen my situation. So, I snort, and just sit there, ready to take whatever sick, twisted methods of torture they have for me.

"Do your worst, worm, but you will slip up, and I will make you suffer! You hear me? SUFFER!!!" I exclaim, ready to tear Twilight a new asshole if I ever get the chance.

"No, you won't. Those straps can't be cut, and I doubt your magic will save you. Now, I'll be back in a little bit with Celestia and Luna. Then, we'll decide what to do with you." Twilight threatened, and I sat there, fuming and seething. However, minutes pass, and I begin to feel drowsy. So, I take a quick nap. When I wake up, I see a pink face in mine, and reel back in shock.

"Waagh! What are you doing there!?" I ask, panicking. Pinkie just giggles infuriatingly, then responds:

"I'm seeing if you have eyes, silly! I thought you were sleeping, but your eyes always look open, so..." She says, but I interrupt her:

"That's because this is a helmet, you moron!" I yell, and Pinkie's eyes get really big and sparkly, and I begin to regret saying anything.

"That's such a cool helmet! I want it! Can I have it?" She asks.

"No!!!" I yell, but Pinkie comes up and tries to remove it anyway.

"Too bad!" She says, removing it and putting it on her own head without even looking at me.

"Hey! Give it back!" I yell, and she looks at me, about to say something, but then she stops dead for some reason, and takes off the helmet. Then, she puts her face really, uncomfortably close to mine, and starts inspecting it.

"Woah... Your face is so weird... I love it! I have to show Twilight this!" She says, bouncing off.

"Wait! Put my helmet back on!" I cry, but Pinkie has already left.

"... Please?" I say weakly, and I stare longingly at my helmet for another minute, until Twilight and Pinkie come back in, and Twilight seems to have scolded the blubbering, pink menace. Then, she picks up my helmet, and puts it back on my head, all without looking at my face.

"Now, Pinkie, you can't do that anymore! Celestia has told us that she'd be the one to unmask him! Now, don't do that again!" She says, and my rage swells.

"Yes, you hyperactive nuisance, don't touch me again!" I say, but Twilight casts a death glare at me.

"Don't start talking! If I hear a peep from you, I'll let Pinkie do whatever she wants to you!" Twilight threatens, but I'm feeling pretty bold (piss and vinegar will do that to you).

"What, and disobey your princess? You have no power over me!" I say, pushing my luck. Twilight, however, just looks at me with that same hateful expression.

"You know what, Pinkie? Go nuts with him. That'll teach him some manners." She says, and Pinkie salutes.

"Okie Dokie Lokie!" Pinkie says, and I start panicking as she puts her arms around my neck and shoulders playfully.

"Wait! I was just kidding! Don't let this idiot near me! Please!!!" I cry, but Twilight ignores me, and leaves the basement. Before she closes the door, though, she pokes her head through, and calls out:

"By the way, Pinkie's in heat, so good luck surviving!" She calls, then leaves, locking the door.

"... Heat..?" I whimper, looking back at the bouncy, playful nuisance behind me.

"Oh, Maly, we're gonna have soooo much fun! You and me, in Twilight's basement, could you think of a better place to play truth or dare? Or maybe spin the bottle! Or twister!!!" She listed excitedly, and I could only mutter as the annoying, befuddled mare continued her rant of sex-related party games.

"What do you think, Maly-waly?" Pinkie asks, snapping me out of my thoughts.

"Enh... Huh? What?" I reply with utmost situational awareness.

"What would you play first if you were unbound, silly?" Pinkie said, tightening her grip around me.

"I wouldn't play a single game with you if they bribed me, you nuisance." I say, which was kinda true, depending on the bribe and the game.

"Oh, come on! You gotta cut loose sometime! Maybe if you dropped those heavy robes, or that stuffy helmet, you wouldn't be such a meany-head!" Pinkie says, getting in front of me.

"You even touch either of those things, I will kill you!" I threaten, but my words fall on deaf, pink ears.

" You won't do that! You're too nice!" Pinkie says, snuggling me.

"No I'm not! You can't prove that!" I cry, but Pinkie laughs.

"Of course you are! Every option you had to finally destroy us, you let us live! You are, like, the nicest villain I've ever met!" Pinkie says, and I'm tempted to struggle, but I see no reason. It's no use, thanks to the straps, and the blubbering pink thing won't let me go.

"I'm not nice, and I don't like you, at all! Now stop touching me!!!" I shout, but she does not seem to hear me or care. She just keeps cuddling, and my fury just... leaves. It's weird, but... I think she's making me less angry! Oh, god, I have to get the hell out of here!

"Maly, I know you want to be evil, but don't be so angry! Here, let's have some fun!" Pinkie exclaims, unhanding me.

"What kind of fun?" I ask suspiciously.

"Let's play the cuddle game!" Pinkie says, and my brain's danger centers start flashing red before I can process what she just said.

"No! Absolutely not!" I say, but Pinkie just smiles wider.

"You have to! As Twilight said, I could do anything to you!" She says.

"She never said I had to give my consent." I reply, and Pinkie harrumphs at my infallible logic.

"Still, You're in a chair, and in a locked basement! Youuu..." She begins, poking my helmet where my nose would be. "Don't get a say!" She finishes triumphantly.

"Now, we will play the cuddle game, because I say so!" Pinkie says, and my ever-present inner voice kicks in.

"This is your chance to escape! If you do as she says, she'll lose her energy, and you can take her key and leave!" my inner voice says, but I almost choke at the idea.

"WHAT!? NO! I got raped by a dragon, and that's the extent of it! I refuse to even THINK about doing such thing with... HER kind!!!" I reply psychically.

"Ooh! What are we talking about psychically?" Pinkie's voice butts in.

"What the-!? How did you get in here!?" My inner voice responds.

"I just wanted to see what you two were talking about!" Pinkie says mentally, smiling.

"Get out! this is between me and my brain! You butt out!" I think angrily.

"Okay..." Pinkie thinks sadly, and I feel her annoying presence leave my head.

"Now, where were we..? Oh, right. No, no, no, no, no, no, no!!! I refuse the mere thought of doing that with her, or any other of her kind!" I think. My pride may be wounded, but it wasn't dead yet!

"Would you drop your ego for a second and LOOK AROUND YOU!? You are in a basement, captured, and with no hope of escape but her! WOULD YOU JUST DROP YOUR EGO FOR A SECOND AND DO SOMETHING SO YOU DON'T FUCKING GET US BOTH KILLED!?!?" My inner voice screamed at the top of it's metaphorical lungs. I think on this for a second, and I sigh. For once, my voice is right beyond a shadow of a doubt, and to escape, I needed to get my hands dirty... eargh...

"Alright, Pinkie, I... I'll play this... cuddle game... with you." I sigh, hoping with all my heart that it's not as bad as I think it is. I was right: It was worse.

"Yay! I knew you'd come around!" Pinkie says, undoing my binds, but removing my gauntlets.

"Okay, so, how do we play this snuggle ga-WHUFF!" I cry, as I'm turbo-glomped by a hyperactive, pink blur, and she just cuddles me. Now, I am NOT, EVER going into details about this horrible, sweaty ordeal, but I will say this: The vicious, depraved game goes on for hours, with just her grappling and cuddling me, and trying to... eugh, DO stuff to me... horrible, shameless, depraved stuff... However, after hours of fighting off the pink nuisance, I finally manage to get MY arms around her in the end, and I squeeze her so hard, she has to tap out.

At the end of the twisted game, We're both laying on our backs, exhausted, sweating, and half-naked, which I am NOT happy with. However, I have emerged victorious, and Pinkie is just sitting there, stunned, probably because of how badly I beat her.

"Wow, I never lose the cuddle game..." Pinkie says tearfully. I just laugh.

"You just did. Now, please leave me alone." I say, laying on my back, exhausted, but feeling like nothing worse could happen now. However, Pinkie starts crying again, and my inner voice, like the white knight it is, tells me to make her stop. So I go over, and pat her shoulder.

"There there... You... did your... best..." I manage, gagging on my own words.

"I-I'm not sad because I lost..." She says, and I'm struck by mild curiosity.

"If it's not that, then why are you blubbering?" I ask, annoyed.

"Well, I'm just sad because I know you won't claim your prize for winning, you know, with you hating me and all..." Pinkie says, and I perk up at the sound of a prize.

"Prize? Well, I might be able to accept a prize. What is it?" I ask, hoping from the bottom of my heart that the prize is the key to the basement door. But then, instead of producing a key, Pinkie just smiles, pounces me, and, uh, well... I think I've said enough on this incident... Ugh...

Anyway, so Pinkie's all out of steam, and I'm shivering and traumatized. I then see my chance, and slowly creep up to my target: Pinkie's dress, which MUST have the key. Sure enough, I find it in a pocket on the dress. So I take it, put on my robes and armor, and almost exit... but something stops me. I look back, and I see Pinkie shivering. Well, obviously she would be; she's lying, naked, on a cold, stone floor! So, in a bout of kindness I hope to NEVER experience again, I place her shirt over her, and she automatically wraps it around her, and I leave, disgusted at what I had just done... both things.

Anyway, I find my exit, and find myself in... the library? As I stare at my surroundings, I remember my first plan to obtain power: Search the Library for a book on summoning. Well, here I coincidentally am, so I might as well look while I'm here, right? So I peer at the books, but none of them have titles, and those that do say nothing of summoning. I search the library up and down for hours, but I find nothing. Finally, though, I find a promising book on the second floor: "A brief introduction to daemons and atronachs: volume II". Seeing that this has just as much value as anything else involving summoning, I take it, crawl down the ladder, and try to make my escape. I reach the door rather easily, seeing that no one was home. However, as soon as I move for the door handle, it starts to shake, and I panic, looking left, then right, then diving behind a chair.

The door opens, and I peer over an arm... And there is Twilight, Celestia, and Luna, all walking in! I almost panic, but I force myself to be quiet, and creep around them, still behind the chair, as they walk past me.

"...Anyway, He's in the basement. I have Pinkie keeping close watch on him." Twilight says, leading the princesses toward the basement where I should have been.

"Yeah, closer than I'd have liked..." I mutter, and all three princesses stop, and look around, as if they heard me. I wasn't even that loud! Nevertheless, I make myself stay so still, I almost forced my heart to stop beating. Seconds passed, but they each felt like an eternity as the three princesses looked around the room. I swear, I almost had a heart attack when Celestia herself looked right at me for a second, but she then turned her attention elsewhere. Then, with a shrug, they continue on, to my endless relief, and I sneak past, open the door quietly, and sneak out, closing it behind me. I think I heard something from within the library that sounded like shouting, but I didn't care. I was free, again! Malideus: 6. Pesky ponies: 0. THAT was a score I could live with. Unfortunately, that score was about to be settled when Twilight, Luna, and Celestia burst from the library, and see me instantly.

"YOU!!!" Twilight screams, preparing to destroy me.

"Oh, Hi, guys, funny story, see, I was just leaving..." I said, but the princesses all shot and missed me before I could finish my funny story about leaving.

"Tough crowd. Well, smell ya later!" I say, taking off so fast, I leave a dust cloud that bears my general appearance. Imagine that! But I forget, those princesses can run. So they try to catch me as I dip and weave through the crowd, but I keep well ahead of them, for god knows what they'll do to me if they catch me. I manage to keep a good pace, but it's not enough. So, I cast frost walls, fling boulders, and try to immolate them, but nothing works! I finally make it to the edge of the town, and I step outside... and Luna freezes me up to my neck with a direct hit from some spell she cast.

"FUCK!!!" I yell as the three drag me away.

"Trying to escape... humiliating me... Malideus, I'm going to kill you!" Twilight says as she drags me away.

"That is for us to decide, Twilight. After we've tried him, then you can do as you wish with him... If I don't keep him first." Celestia says bitterly.

"I regret nothing!... Except participating in the cuddle game! I very much regret that!" I shout defiantly as they throw me into the carriage the two main princesses rode into town in.

"I want my rights! I want my lawyer! I want my one phone call!" I shout, but the princesses ignore me, and we are soon off to the castle, where my trial awaits. I have no fears, but I still cry out for someone to read me my rights as I'm dragged to Canterlot, and then to a cell, where I break out of my icy prison. However, the cell door itself is unbreakable, and I see no way out. So, I sit on a cot for an hour, bored out of my skull. I wait, and wait, and even flip through the book I stole earlier, wondering if I could summon a demon on the spot, so I could get out of this hell-hole. Unfortunately, nothing pops up, so I sit for even longer.

It seems like an eternity before someone shows, and It's none other than Celestia herself.

"Bitch, you'd better have a good reason for showing your face." I growl, and Celestia doesn't even crack a smile. In fact, she seems kinda sad.

"Malideus... Do you know why you are here?" She asks, and I shrug.

"I suppose it's because I did wrong actions." I say, and Celestia nods.

"Yes. That is why you are here. But I want to know why you are as you are." She says sadly, looking at me.

"You have much potential, but you squander it being cruel and unusual to us. Why do you do this?" She asks, and I laugh.

"Because I can, mostly. I want to kill, so I kill. Why? I think you already know why." I say, and Celestia speaks up:

"No, Malideus, You are not evil. Cadence has told me of your troubled heart. She saw good in you, and still claims to. She told me of your incursion at The crystal empire, and how you almost killed her husband." She says.

"Exactly! That should prove my alignment! I dealt such blows to her pitiful moron of a husband, it almost killed him!" I say, but Celestia shakes her head.

"But you didn't. From what we heard, you had a sword when you fought him. You knocked him out, yes, but you did not use that sword on him, or on Cadence when you had the perfect opportunity to do so." Celestia explains, shaking her head.

"Malideus... I think she may be right. You are only confused, and need to think. Maybe some years imprisoned in stone will help you discover yourself, but with all the enemies you made... I fear that you may not be saved. However, If you confess and beg pardon to the crowd you have gathered..." She can't even finish before my laughter interrupts her.

"If they came to hear me beg, they will be disappointed. I will not lie; I am no coward, I was never good, and Cadence is a trusting fool, much like you. When I get out there, I will finally have the chance to spit upon the faces of your people." I say. Celestia, though, sighs, lowering her head.

"I know you are lying. But if you will not try to save yourself, then I cannot help you. But, before your trial, may I at least see your face?" She asks.

"No." I say, and Celestia seems surprised.

"Why do you hide your face further, Malideus? It's over for you. If it is your desire to die, then at least let me see who we are killing." She demands, but I take great joy in her frustration.

"No. I will not remove my identity for you, or for anyone else." I say, and Celestia seems to grow annoyed.

"... Fine. I will personally unmask you during your trial, then. You have one hour to prepare yourself, Malideus. I wish you the best of luck." She says, and she walks away. I feel sick again, but I waive it off. I don't need luck. I was going to die, anyway. But I knew that, then why wasn't I striving to live another day? Maybe being stone didn't seem appealing, and I would rather die than undergo that? I sighed at that thought, and a part of me agreed. It was bogus and I knew it. I guess, really, I'm just fed up with life. Nothing seems to go right for me when I'm trying to be nice, like on my old world, and when I'm evil, I end up getting killed. So, I'm done. I sit on my cot, hands in my laps, and I wait... until a guard walks up to my cell well before an hour, unlocking it.

"Come on, get out." The guard says, motioning me out. However, I do not leave.

"Sure got the trial done fast. Guess everyone in the world wants to see me die." I say, getting up. However, instead of cuffing me, the guard pulls me out of the cell, and starts leading me somewhere. I quickly realize that this isn't normal, and I pull my hand away from the odd guard.

"Hold up, where are we going? I don't think you're doing your job right." I say, and the guard sighs, looking to me.

"Listen, we're not going to the trials. I'm getting you out of here." The guard says, and I begin to question some things, like if this is even a guard, for starters.

"Oh really? How can I trust you, or more importantly, why would I WANT to trust you?" I ask, furious that a pony would try to align themselves with me. However, the 'guard' just sighed, then, in a flash of green light, turned into a changeling, causing my blood to boil and my pimp hand to twitch.

"You!?!" I exclaim, recognizing the distinct marks of an armored pimp-slap across the left side of her face. This was the same bitch that tried to steal the crystal heart from me!

"Yes, me. Now stop yelling so we can get out!" The changeling says, grabbing for my arm, but I bring it away before she can grab it.

"Why are you helping me, pest!? Why should I not destroy you here and find my OWN exit?" I ask, and the changeling flinches, but her resolve is unwavering, and she stands tall (but is still a head shorter than me), and explains her position:

"Mizzietta sent me to find you. She figured that something was wrong, and I happened to be in the area..." She says, but I interrupt her.

"What were you doing near a known hideout of mine? Start talking, bug!" I demand, picking the changeling up by the neck and preparing to scar the other side of her face with the back of my hand. However, she doesn't seem afraid... in fact, I think I see the slightest smile on her face! What the fuck was this!?

"Well, I reported empty-handed to Queen Chrysalis, but she went ballistic, and, well, I was ordered to be executed. But I remembered how much of a better leader you were, able to command a dragon,... Oh, I had to come and join you! So I escaped, and here I am!" She explained enthusiastically, and I dropped her out of confusion.

"You... sought me out... to join me..?" I pondered, putting the numbers together. "But I almost killed you? What is wrong with your head that you would come back?" I asked, still confused.

"Well, i-it's like you said... I guess when you... well... I..." The changeling stuttered, and I quickly grew impatient, so I bonked her hard on the head with my fist to see if it would make her stop, and she did, but oh, god, her face... It was like she enjoyed it!

"You've got to be kidding me..." I said, putting two and two together. The changeling then turned green, which I guess was it blushing, and started stuttering again.

"Well, I guess it's true: I've accidentally made you my bitch." I say, interrupting the blubbering insect. But I'm not disgusted or mad. This changeling found pleasure in the punishment I dealt, so was therefor the ultimate stress relief. In short, I was happy this changeling found her way back to me; Lord knows I'm usually pretty damn stressed.

"... Alright, I guess I could use another henchman, er, woman. But you still have to get me out of here." I say, and the changeling smiles eagerly, changing back into a guard.

"Okay, sir! This way!" She says, and I follow. We then proceed to creep around the dungeon halls for hours, poking our heads around corners, and checking for guards, who I quickly freeze and neutralize. After an hour or two of this, we begin to hear and see many more guards, all rushing as if searching for something, and I'm pretty sure that it's me that they're looking for. However, we evade them with ease, and manage to get out of the dungeon, into the main chamber. As I look around, I see great big holes and burn marks in and on the floor, a clear reminder of the last time I was here. Clearly Celestia has had better things to do than fix her castle. Nonetheless, guards cover the ground level, and I start to feel cocky.

"Get behind me, changeling." I say, pushing her behind me.

"What? Why?" she asks.

"Because you are useless to me dead. I'm going to send Celestia a little message before we go." I say, readying my magic.

"You mean... You're going to... K-kill them..?" The changeling asks nervously, and I laugh.

"Maybe, depends on if they run or not." I say, and I walk down the steps, attracting the attention of every guard in the room.

"Get him!" the all cry, and I lazily zap and blast them, sending guards to the ground, into the air, and into walls. Some guards, unfortunately, simply had tragic luck, and had their heads, legs, and various other appendages blown up or off, sometimes both. Nonetheless, A lot of guards got off with mere concussions, and were very lucky to be alive. As I step over the unconscious and mangled bodies of my adversaries, I look at the book I stole from Twilight's Library. If I could do this much damage at minimal power, Imagine what I could summon! I then put the book away, and continue. Then, when we reach outside, I blast the two guards at the door, and beckon my newest minion forth.

"So, changeling, how do we get out of here?" I ask.

"Well, I suppose I could fly us out of here..." She says, and I smile beneath my helmet.

"Then change into something, and fast." I say, and the changeling turns into a pegasus. The actual horse kind, I mean, not the fucked-up ponies from this world. That would just be awkward.

"...That's it?" I ask, not particularly impressed.

"I can't change into anything bigger!" She complains, and I facepalm.

"I suppose this will do. Now, fly, before I really hurt you!" I say, getting on my minion's back. Soon we are in the air, and on our way home.

"Ah, another day, another foe outsmarted. Malideus, you magnificent bastard, is there anyone you can't beat?" I say, looking back at the city of Canterlot.

"Uh, actually, sir, I did help... OW!!!" The changeling yelps as I punch the back of her head.

"You do not get any credit until you've gotten me to safety, changeling! Now mush!" I shout, pointing forward.

"Y-yes sir..." The changeling says subserviently, and off we continue, back to Mizzietta's lair. I think, now, that it's time I gave this summoning thing a shot...