"Hey, get up," I felt something knock my foot, "Get the fuck up!" Something threw my legs off the arm of the couch and onto the floor.

I snapped awake at the sound of my boots hitting the floor, "Ah! Christ, what happened!?" I quickly opened my eyes to a pissed off man with a shotgun in front of me, "Jesus!"

"Why are you here?"

"Huh!?"

He brought the gun to my gut, "Why are you here?"

"Fucking hell! I walked your friend home last night! Go ask her!" He grimaced and grabbed me by the collar.

"Move!" He pushed me into a hall and against a wall, "Nightshade!"

"Whua~?"

"Get out here now!" The door behind us quickly opened to an extremely frightened batmare, "Do you know him?"

"Yes, dear Luna...put him down!" The Russian showily relaxed his grip and turned me around.

"Apologies," He fixed my collar, "Now...oh wait...you are guard..."

"Right...the one with the beer....Christ...you really scared the shit," I leaned back against the wall to catch my breath, "Jesus...."

"Oh calm down..." He walked out into the living room.

"Dear Luna are you ok?" The batmare trotted over to me.

"Do I look bloody ok!?" I was breathing heavily trying to calm down, "Your friends a daft madman...." I quickly righted myself and hurried to the door.

"Wait!"

"No! Screw you," I started to walk out only to be grabbed by the Russian, "WHAT THE FUCK!?" The Russian pressed a pistol into my hands, "What tha shit!?"

"I was like you before...police....keep with you, will save you much pain...now get out," He shoved me out the door.

"Wha- I- with tha- WHAT!?" I was left standing outside with a pistol in my hands, "What tha actual fuck!?"

"Go away..." The Russian sounded from behind the door, "...we are even after this, now leave...."

"I- fuck!" I just stomped off towards home, I needed to get ready quick.

"Wait!" The Russian leaned out, "Forgot this...." He set a leather holster on his stoop, "Better to not risk shooting self..."

I didn't say anything aside from a few grumbles. I grabbed it and ran off to my house. Kim's gonna lose her shit.

"Cool....is it loaded?" She swung the gun around.

"FUCKING CHRIST KIM!"

"What?" She pointed it at me.

"Fuck!" I ducked away, "Don't fucking point that thing at me!"

"Oh calm down ya Nancy...here" She handed the gun back, "It's just a gun," I pulled the slide back and a round popped out, "....well the safety was on," I check and the gun was ready to fire, ".......well I didn't shoot ya," I set the gun on a nearby table, "So....gonna keep it?"

"I don't know....I don't even know why he gave it to me, he said something about police...."

"Maybe he meant the guard?" She pulled her legs to her chest, "I mean you said he pointed a gun at ya,"

"No...he knew the guard captain, they seemed like friends...what did he say....save much pain, whatever that means,"

"Oh keep it for now...go talk to em later,"

"I guess....I'm gonna go get ready....I'm gonna be late at this rate," I walked into my room to get dressed, I set the gun in my dresser.

"You're late...." Shining armor walked over to me, "...why are you late?"

I slowly jogged over to him, "Well- it was- an interesting start- to tha day-" He just shook his head.

"Come on...all the other guards have their trainees picked," He started back into the guard quarters.

"Wait- so you're-"

"Yes...now hurry up...I'm not even supposed to be here...." He hurriedly trotted into the guard quarters with me in tow, "Just...sit," He pointed to a desk off in the corner, "Be a good chance to learn the basics of paperwork..." He went into his office and quickly returned with a stack of papers, "Just run through these forms, check them for typos," I looked over the forms, they were simple requisitions forms all the same except for signatures.

"...so this is it?" I asked setting the forms down, "This is really all i'm gonna do?"

"Yep....welcome to the wonderful world of officer grade work," He walked into his office and slammed the door.

"....bloody....bollocks,"

"Fuuuuuuuuuuck.....fuck you.....Sanders," I set another form aside. I slammed my head into the table, "I'm losing my damn mind...."

"Excuse me...." Someone tapped the desk, I slowly lifted my face upright, resting on my chin.

It was one of the night guards, "Oh....sup?"

"Your presence has been requested,"

"By how?"

"She asked not to be named yet..."

"....of cripes....it's the tall one ain't?"

"Just follow me," She started trotting towards the door. I had a quick internal debate on whether or not to tell the captain and decided to say sod it to the mound of paperwork.

I quickly grabbed my personal stuff and met her at the door, "Oh....rain...here," I popped my umbrella open, "Leave it to an Englishmen...." She gave me an odd look, obviously missing the joke entirely.

"Thank you....now come along," She started out into the rain with me following at her side.

She lead me up a flight of stairs deeper into the castle, "So....she say why she wanted to see me?"

"No,"

"......any ideas?"

"No...." She said with increased agitation.

".....you're a bender..."

"Excuse me?"

"slag....." She stopped and glared at me before starting back up the stairs.

"Behave yourself."

"oi behave yerself, don ya do dat, don ya do dis, don do anythin.....I know how to operate in public," I could tell I was getting to her, her tail swishing violently left and right. Eventually we reached the end of the stairs and she pointed down the hall.

"Just go...."

"Right.....I'm not saying sorry....except I am," The bat mare just rolled her eyes and started back down the stairs, "Well....better to get this over with," I walked forward, pausing at the door, "......could be worse..." I pressed through the door.

"Mr. Eldridge, good morning," The room looked like a small study with Luna sitting on a cushion off to the side, "Please, take a seat." She levitated a chair next to her. I looked around the room and hesitantly walked over to her.

She was wearing what looked like a pair of reading glasses and had her mane pulled back, "So....you uh....you asked fer me?" She levitated a book to the side as well as her glasses.

"Indeed,"

".....can I ask why?" I said growing increasingly uneased.

"I assume you would enjoy the presences of a pretty mare, and our last conversation was cut short." There was a short stint where she just stared me in the eyes, myself trying to look at something else.

"Right....well I was kind of in the mid-"

"I am aware of what you were asked to do,"

"Oh.....well I should-" She levitated the entire cushion herself included closer to me.

"My loyal subject would rather sort forms than spend a few fleeting moments with me?" She looked up at me with a mix of puppy eyes and pleading.

"Uh....I guess..." I settle back into my seat and swallowed the lump in my throat.

"Excellent," She scooted even closer, eye to eye with me, "And may I ask, have you decided which guard to join?"

"Well I-"

"There are many who are not, robust, enough for the night guard. I feel you however might be a perfect addition," The way she said robust completely took me off guard. I scooted my chair back.

"Well....I-"

"I am also sure my subjects are rewarded for their service..." She scooted even closer, myself yet again in retreat.

"......well concidering-"

"If you need more...convincing," She reached a hoof out, barely grazing my knee before I stood up sharply, my chair flying off behind me.

"Jesus!" I took a few steps back and turned away as to hide my....person...., "Ya know...I'm startin to think you had ulterior motives callin me up 'ere." I turned back around to her rolled on her back head still facing me, "Christ in a hand-basket....."

"Hmm?"

"Nothing....." I shifted uncomfortably, "Just.....considering what I've done with both guards......chasing crims is more appealing than sittin in a bloody desk all day,"

"Joyous!" She popped up and almost barreled through me, instead forcing me against a bookshelf, "You will be a wonderful addition!"

"Right...well can you-" Before I could ask to get some room she pulled me into a bear hug and leaned us against the bookcase, "Hurk-......."

"A truly wonderful addition," She rocked slightly back and forth grinding book spines into my back. She kept this up, nearly crushing me like a vice, for a few minutes.

"....cant....can't breathe......" She must have heard me because she let go and returned to all fours, leaving me to fall to the floor, gasping for air, "Christ.......you'er pressed right up against ma chest....bloody....cripes,"

"Oh my...perhaps you should lay down," I felt her magic tug at my sleeve.

"No! No it's fine..." I got to my feet, "I'm fine....just....need to get going," I stumbled to the door.

"Halt!" She boomed from behind. I froze right at the door.

I quickly ran through the cause of all this, "......why......I fuckin fucked up....."

"Here," A book levitated infront of me, "A history of the night guard," I took it from her and started to turn to her.

"Oh...nea-" Once she and I were face to face she basically shoved her tongue into my mouth and pressed me back into the door. It only lasted a second before she broke off and turned away, "....Oi...what?!"

She didn't answer, instead facing away and looking at one of the bookcases, "Now I believe you have a task," I stood their for a moment before shakily pushing back through the door. A pair of guards got one look at me and started cackling and pointing at my face.

"You're soooo red!"

"Aw...looks like someones excited,"

I looked myself over, "SHUT IT!" I quickly walked past and down the stairs, their laughs still audible halfway down.

I started off back to my house, the way I figured it my choice was made whether I like it or not. It was still raining so I was in a bit of a hurry to get back.

I reached my front door after a short jog and burst in, throwing my things next to the door, "Oi Tomas....oi..you alright?"

"I don't want ta talk about it," I walked past her and went to get undressed.

"Tomas.....you really look kinda....mullered..."

"...yeah....let's just say today was.....unique," I got redressed and went into the living room, "I still taste it...." I said completely drained.

"Taste what?"

"......nothing...." *Bang Bang* "Ta hell's that?"

"Maybe one of your guard frie- .....holy shit...." Kim froze and walked past me into the bathroom.

"Kim? Kim who is it? Kim!?"

"Oi Tommy, let us in!"

"Andrew?!" I yelled walking to the door.

"Who else would be knockin on yer door, ain't no lady that's fer sure," I unlocked the door and In burst Andrew, "Oi there brother-" He gave me a quick fist-bump, forced of course, "Whats up?"

"...I- you- Germany-"

"Oh that? They let me out for that a few months ago," He walked past and threw himself on my couch, "So....heard yer tryin to be a cop or summthin?"

".....Andrew...how the hell did ya find me?" He looked over the couch.

"I have ma ways," He winked and sank back into my couch, "Anyways....how the local girls treat ya....better yet you finally lose your V-Card?"

".......Andrew....what the fuck?"

"What, you still haven't gotten laid? Bloody good thing I'm here then!" I started slinking off to my room, "Oi...oi Tomas....Tommy.....gonna go have a wank? Fine, we can pick up some birds later," I slummped into my room and threw my upperbody onto my bed.

".....I can't believe they let him out...." The German prison system must be lenient as hell. Next Chapter: Thursday Estimated time remaining: 46 Minutes