Tuesday, April 2nd, 2014…

My muscles had really been feeling mushy lately, but with right cause. I hadn’t properly worked out for over a week, due to the whole truck adventure thing. Since four this morning I had been transitioning between sit-ups and push-ups and it was really starting to get to me.

My arms burned as I pushed my torso up off the ground with a grunt. Sweat oozed from my pours and stung my vision. I let out a vocal note that sounded like a mix between a grunt and a hiss.

Naturally, I would’ve just wiped my face with my palms, but they were equally as sweaty. My face tilted itself almost naturally into my shoulder as I tried to cleanse my eyes of the stinging sweat.

My elbows cocked and I lowered myself then, with a grunt, pushed myself back up with a breath of air. Just before I lowered myself again, a body slipped between me and the floor.

“Hey Evan,” Twilight greeted me and I struggled to keep myself from collapsing.

“Twi…” I grunted, but she silenced me and brought a hoof to my mouth.

“Evan, I just wanted to say: thank you for bringing me to dinner last night. It was really nice,” she stated.

“Twilight!” I growled, my body now shaking from strain, but again she kept me silent. Rather than say anything, she just looked at me with a strange look. Finally, after several moments, my body gave out on me and I collapsed. As my near limp body pinned her to the floor, she let out a yelp of shock.

My weight threatened to crush her beneath me, but as soon as I fell over on top of her, I rolled to the side with an exhausted gasp. My body burned from the exertion I had put it through while heavy breathing echoed in the room as I brought my forearm across my face and tried to wipe my eyes dry, but to no avail.

“What was that for?!” Twilight asked in a shocked tone as she rubbed her forehead attentively.

“I… tried to… tell you… not to lay beneath me…” I gasped then struggled together a sentence. “What were you… doing there anyway?” I asked and she thought to herself, probably trying to remember why exactly she was lying underneath me.

“Oh uhm… no reason really,” she stated with a nervous laugh, not answering my question with any sense of mind. I placed my left hand over my face and groaned, then felt a hoof pull my hand away. Twilight peered down on me with a worried look.

“Evan, you’re pushing yourself too hard again. You should go outside and relax a little,” she told me, though I wasn’t sure if it was a suggestion or an order. I nodded and struggled to get up.

I felt a tingly feeling around my back and it felt as if some mystic force was lifting my body up. I tried painfully to look over my shoulder, but all I saw was the floor, then I noticed Twilight’s horn glowing.

I steadied myself then nodded. “Thanks Twi,” I stated, then tried to walk forwards and nearly collapsed as blood rushed to my head.

Twilight lept to her hindlegs and stuffed her head beneath my right arm, placing her left hoof around my back, and helped support my heavy frame. She was… helping me… she was helping me stand because I couldn’t.

She tilted her head and looked up to me with a faint smile. “Don’t worry, I’ve got you,” she said with a bright smile and I felt my emotions start to get to me. “You shouldn’t push yourself so hard. I’d be heartbroken if I lost you. I love you too much,” Twilight stated. Her words of motherly love touched my heart in a way that I couldn’t fight.

My feelings seemed to turn all mushy and tears nearly flooded my eyes. I couldn’t pin it, but her stating that she was there for me… it just killed my mental wall between toughness and emotional sappiness.

She noticed me trying to hold back. “Are you… crying?” she asked and I boldly shook my head with a sniffle.

“Ngh… no… I got sweat in my eyes again… NGH!” I grunted loudly as I tried painfully to wipe away the tears in my eyes. Twilight pulled my hand away and stood nearly face to face with me, if she was about seven inches taller, she’d be at my height when she was on her hindlegs.

“Evan, it’s okay to cry,” she told me with a heartwarming smile. I grunted as I tried even harder to suppress my emotions. I can’t cry, it’s just… I can’t, I’m Burdy!

“I’m not… it’s sweat… it’s making my eyes burn,” I partly lied. In truth, the sweat was kind of burning my eyes, but that’s not where the tears were coming from.

“Evan…” she trailed off and slowly leaned her face forwards. She gave me a gentle peck on the cheek, then nestled her face into mine. “I love you. I love you so much and I’ll always be there for you.” She spoke words that broke me down and I couldn’t hold back. My heart wrenched and I became a blubbering wreck.

I fell to my knees and Twilight dropped down to all fours. I clenched my hands and slammed the base of my fists into the floor, trying to force the emotional distraught away with physical pain.

“Evan! Just… relax, it’s okay,” Twilight tried to comfort me as she rested a hoof on my shoulder and knelt down beside me. My heart began thumping in my chest as I started getting choked up from my sniffles.

“I can’t… I can’t cry… It’s not… not right!” I muttered to myself, trying to rebuild the pride that I had lost. Twilight’s hoof rubbed circles on my back as she nestled up to me.

“Evan, it’s okay to cry. Just let it out,” she offered. I didn’t say anything and started sniffling as I tried to calm myself down. “Evan, what’s wrong?” she asked and I shook my head.

“I don’t know… I DON’T… know.” I gasped as tears blurred my vision. “I ju… I jus… I just get really emotional sometimes,” I stated and Twilight gave me a caring smile.

“You know, keeping your emotions pent up isn’t good,” Twilight informed me and I shook my head.

“It’s not that. Not at all,” I began. “I’m rock hard… most of the time, but…” I trailed off as my pride suffered a second crushing blow. “Sometimes… sometimes when someone who I know really well… like you... when they help me and say that they’re there for me it… it messes me up,” I told her.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to,” she apologized, but I shook my head.

“It’s not your fault…” I trailed off as I finally started getting a grasp on myself. Twilight pulled me into a tight hug as I just stayed stationary on my knees, my arms hanging about freely.

After several minutes, my tears stopped flowing and my breathing returned to normal. I reached my left hand around Twilight and returned her hug, which was kind of awkwardly difficult because I was on my knees and she was on all fours.

“Thank you Twi,” I whispered and she nodded before giving me a more attentive kiss to my cheek. I tilted my face to the side and gave her cheek an attentive kiss in return. Her fur was soft against my lips and her fragrance was invigorating.

“Evan, I do love you, and I will always be there for you,” she told me with a loving tone. After a moment's time we both stood up to our natural heights. I brushed my right hand across her soft cheek as our smiles met.

I sucked back through my nose to get rid of whatever was left from my emotional downfall, then let my bright smile fade to a dimmer one so I wouldn’t look so goofy. “Thanks… mom. I love you,” I told her just how much I loved her and she gave my side a light nudge.

“Now go on, enjoy the day, it’s nice outside. You shouldn't be pent up in this dark gloomy basement when it's sunny out,” she told me. I nodded and began to make my way for the entrance to the library.

Hours later…

It was now noon time and, after a half an hour of wandering around Ponyville, I decided to change the scenery a bit and go to the lakeside.

The sun beat down on my nearly bare body as I lay on the soft sand of the lakeside. All I had on was a pair of boxer briefs that I used a improvised swimming trunks. Funny, around Ponyville this place was considered a lakeside, yet the texture of the sand was more like a beach shore.

I had plunged my camouflage cargo pants, socks and white V-neck t-shirt in the lake before hanging them on a tree to dry, saving myself from having to wash them at home. My Norinco 870 clone laid resting against the tree trunk. Ever since the whole Daring Do thing, I had made a personal note to bring a gun with me wherever I went, if I could.

As I lay with my hands resting beneath my head, I daydreamed about life. In the beginning, I thought that this world was terrible, I truly did. Magic, ridiculous victories for the ponies, seemingly gay things and an unnaturally peaceful world. But now things were starting to piece themselves together. This place wasn’t quite perfect, 'cause there were things like scammers and black markets, but it still blew the pants off my old world.

“I wonder what Scotty would think of this place…” I mused to myself as I thought about my boss… ex-boss I suppose.

A smirk came across my face as I looked down to my muscular chest. “Mmm… man titties!” I laughed playfully, then gave my left side a bit of a squeeze. My nipples were nice and juicy and kind of looked like strawberries.

My friend Noah’s infamous description of my nipples played through my mind. ‘Volcano nipples,’ and I snickered as I continued to feel myself up. I brought my right arm forwards and flexed, then rubbed my bicep as I fantasized myself being Schwarzenegger.

I stood up and put on a blunt expression as I cocked my elbows on a ninety degree angle with my forearms pointing upwards and flexed. I brought my fists down towards my waist and flexed in a reversed pose, again still with a blunt face, and puffed out my chest a little.

“It uhh it feels fantastic… it is a satisfying as cumming is. Like having sex wit a woman an cumming,” I spoke out one of Schwarzenegger’s famous lines then chuckled to myself as I remembered that I was nowhere close to being as big as him when he won Mr. Olympia.

“Maybe I should just work out for the next few years, then become Mr. Equestria… I wonder if they have that here?” I thought aloud. As I became lost in my thoughts and daydreams, I was caught off-guard by a sky-high scream.

I looked up to see Derpy careening downwards with mail letters fluttering about around her. “I GOT YAH DERPY!” I yelled, then positioned myself beneath her path. As she neared closer, my smile faded as I realized how fast she was going.

“Uh-oh…” was all I really managed before she collided with me and crashed us both into the ground. A mild pain coursed itself through my body as we lay on the sandy shore side, a sand cloud masking our exact location.

As the sand cloud settled, Derpy stood up above me and shook off, particles of sand flicking into my face and making me cringe as I tried to avoid getting it in my eyes.

“Hey Evan… wow, sorry about that. I hit a patch of wind turbulence and lost control. Thanks for saving me again,” she thanked me, while at the same time apologizing for the crash landing.

I stretched out my back and shrugged off the pain. “No problem Derpy, I got your back,” I told her with a nod. A sudden irritation in my groin took my immediate attention as I noticed that sand had gotten into my boxers.

“Drat… I’ll be right back Derpy.” With that, I rushed over to the water and lept in, taking a nice moment to simply float around under the surface of the water. After a moment’s time, I surfaced with a deep breath and whipped my head back, then slicked my hair backwards with my hands.

I turned my attention to where Derpy used to be, but noticed she was no longer present. With a shrug, I muttered to myself, “Huh… guess she was in a hurry.”

“CANNONBALL!” A voice yelled and I looked up at the last possible second, only to see a grey flank slam down just beside me. Despite her weight, the with the momentum force she had built up, her cannonball dive created a fair sized tidal wave that pulled me under.

I lost my breath and choked on the water as I quickly resurfaced. Gasping for air while at the same time hacking to get the water out of my lungs, I wiped the water from my face so that I could see. “Well then...” I muttered to myself just as Derpy surfaced in front of me.

Her mane was drooped to one from the water and she shook her mane about, water slapping every which way, making my eyes naturally clench shut. As I opened them, I looked to Derpy who paddled around playfully, giggling all the while.

A mischievous grin spread across my face as I slowly let myself float beneath the surface. I followed Derpy back to the shallow water, while the theme to Jaws was stuck playing in my head.

Just as the lack of fresh oxygen began to burn my lungs, I burst from the water, vocalizing the climax of the Jaws theme. Derpy looked with shock just as I grabbed her and pulled her under. Her body squirmed about as I held her under the water for a brief moment, gently gripping her sides like I was a shark attacking her.

I quickly resurfaced our bodies, snickering from the rather crude joke. As soon as Derpy resurfaced, she shook her mane, then joined in on the childish play.

We began splashing around, throwing mud at each other, pulling each other under the water and all those sorts of things.

As the day progressed, we finally both settled by the beach with a relaxed and unison sigh. The afternoon sun was nice and gave the world a beautiful haze. “That was fun Derpy,” I said, looking only to the orange afternoon sky.

“Yeah…” she trailed off with a content sigh. “Evan, can you do something for me?” she asked and I nodded.

“Sure, what up?” I asked and, as I looked over, I noticed she was standing up.

“Can you brush me off? I can’t shake off some of the sand in my fur,” she asked and with a nod, I stood up, brushed myself off, then quickly gave her back an attentive rub. “A little more please?” she asked. I continued to stroke my hands through her fur and sand fell free from her mane, tail, and body fur.

As I continued to rub her back, her left hindleg began to tap the ground erratically, almost like a dog. Natural instinct brought my right hand to her head and scratched behind her ears.

She let out a satisfied panting noise and her hindleg cocked up and continued to twitch. Ever so gradually, I finished up with Derpy’s pedicure of sort, and stood up. She shook herself like a dog, starting from the head and letting the shake end at her rear with a whip of her tail.

“Thanks Evan. I’d love to play some more, but I gotta finish my mail route,” she told me then zoomed off. I let out a groan of satisfaction, grabbed my clothes and gun, then started making my way back to Ponyville.

Half an hour later…

My boots clustered up puffs of dusty sand as I moseyed through the town. It was like it had suddenly became abandoned, almost like when I had first arrived with Chrysalis. “HEY EVERYPONY, IT’S ME, BURDY, THAT THING THAT LIVES IN TWILIGHT’S BASEMENT!” I yelled out, though nopony returned my call.

I scratched my head, wondering to myself just exactly what was going on. “Huh… well that’s weird. Usually there’s ‘Somepony’ around…” I trailed off as I continued through the town, searching for any signs of desertion.

As I neared the library, I heard a faint voice in the near distance. I tuned in my hearing and listened, something about: great powerful ixy…

I shrugged and started making my way over, and as I did so, the voice got more distinguishable. Whoever was speaking, spoke in third person. Judging by the voice, it was female and, by the sounds things, she was pretty boastful.

I turned a corner around a small house and spotted a large crowd, probably the whole town population, and a center stage. On the stage was a blue unicorn with a dorky wizard hat and cape.

“THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE IS THE BEST PONY!” the mare, whom I’m assuming was Trixie, boasted. I heard several groans come from the crowd, but two cheers echoed.

Two young colts raced to the front of the stage and began worshiping the mare, stating that Trixie should forgive the town for being so ignorant towards her. Suddenly I heard Twilight call out to the mare. “Trixie, would you please stop with this nonsense?” Twilight asked in a rather polite tone.

“Ha! Trixie knew you would try to duke Trixie, but she is too smart for you. Trixie has figured out your secret, Twilight Sparkle! And now Trixie is more powerful than you, even with your new alicorn prowess!” Trixie announced.

I pushed myself through the crowd, wondering how exactly there could be roadshow magicians if there were already vast amounts of magic in this world. I mean, how can you be better then somepony else at levitating a cup of coffee without touching it? Either you can or you can’t.

“What’s crackin?” I asked, mostly directed to Twilight.

“What’s crackin? What’s crackin?!” Trixie yelled, almost as if I had just insulted her. “How could you not know ‘what’s crackin?’ Everypony knows ‘The Great and Powerful TRIXIE!'” she yelled out and I simply scratched my forehead.

“Uhm, well… nice to meet you, Great and Powerful Trixie, I’m Evan, but yah can call me Burdy if you like,” I stated as I extended my hand to greet her. She turned her nose up at my kindness and sneered.

“HA! Trixie doesn’t want your friendship! Trixie is better than anypony here!” she announced in a snooty voice.

“Man, you’re a cunt,” I stated bluntly, making her and Twilight both gasp. I motioned with my hand like I was apologetic. “Sorry, sorry, it slipped. What I meant to say is that you’re a vagina… nah, cunt sounds better. But really, why do you have to be such a bitch?” I asked, making her gasp even louder.

“YOU DARE INSULT THE GREAT AND POWERFUL TRIXIE?!” she thundered and I rolled my eyes.

“Well I wouldn’t have thought you were a bitch until you insulted everypony here by saying you were better than them,” I snapped back. She gave a ‘humph!’ and flung her head to one side, swishing her mane in the process.

“Trixie 'Is' better than everypony here. Anything anypony can do, Trixie can do better!” she announced, causing several more groans to emit from the crowd. “If nopony dares to challenge me, then it’s settled, Trixie is the best,” Trixie stated aloud.

I nudged Twilight, “Get up there and do something magical,” I offered and Twilight gave me a ‘Really?’ look. “Well shit, I don’t know. I just don’t feel like having this thing all like: ‘Trixie is the best, ooh, ahh!’” I stated, mocking Trixie’s voice.

“How dare you insult Trixie further! You should be punished severly!” she yelled, and at that comment, the two younger stallions ran over and began beating my legs, though their hits didn’t even deter my stance. “Enough, he has suffered!” Trixie announced and I raised an eyebrow.

“Really? That wasn’t even a beating. Christ, the way you were talking I thought you'd have tried to hang me, then I'd have to blow you away.” I told her my thoughts and again Trixie laughed.

“Ha, you could not! Because anything you could do, I could do better, and I’d block any pithy attempts of yours!” Trixie stated in a boastful voice.

I sighed and raised an eyebrow. “Really? You really want to do this?” I asked and she continued to taunt me. “Fine,” I replied casually then crawled up onto the stage. The blue unicorn kept the stupid grin on her face while I stepped back to the opposite side of the stage.

“What’s wrong? Stage fright?” she taunted and I smirked.

“Oh, I don’t think I’m gonna be the one with stage fright,” I told her as I unslung the Norinco 870 clone. In an instant, I racked the pump and lined up a shot then blew away a chunk of stage right in front of her.

Everypony gasped from the thunderous gunshot and Trixie was left wide eyed as I racked the slide, then leveled the gun on her. “Next shot blows you away,” I told her and she began to shake in fear.

“You… you wouldn’t!” she stuttered and my trigger-finger slipped into the trigger guard. She fell to her knees and my aim followed her. After several moments, she broke into a furry of tears. “Please! Please don’t kill Trixie! She takes back what she said. She is nothing, less than dirt!” Trixie whimpered.

“DASH! Time?” I asked and Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow.

“Huh?” she asked, completely confused about what was going on.

“How long did it take for me to make her drop to her knees and beg for mercy?” I asked and Dash scratched her head in thought.

“I dunno… about twenty seconds I guess,” she stated and I nodded before stepping over to Trixie.

“I made you beg for mercy in twenty seconds. Do better than that against me,” I told her and she tried to grasp the moment but simply couldn’t, she was still too shaken from the experience.

“I… I can’t,” she replied, using proper English rather than referring to herself in third person.

“Well, I guess that means you’re not better than everypony here…” I knelt down and snarled into her ear. “Everypony should be considered equal, so don’t ever act like that towards my friends again, yah got that… punk!” I snarled and she nodded, weeping terribly.

I hopped off the stage as the crowd started dispersing. “Evan!” Twilight gasped as she and Spike rushed over to me. “You weren’t really contemplating killing her… were you?” she asked in a very worried voice.

I shrugged. “Nah. There were too many kids around and besides, she’s not that bad, just a tad bit rude,” I reported then looked to Spike. “Well… I’m hungry, let’s get something to eat,” I stated and just as I said so, Dash landed beside me.

“Oh hey, speaking of eating, I know a great restaurant,” Dash began but Twilight cut her off.

“NO! No more burping contests! We’ll go home and cook something, besides, it’s less expensive that way,” Twilight countered, to the discomfort of both Dash and I.

“Man, for a princess, she sure is cheap,” I muttered and Twilight raised an eyebrow.

“What was that?” she asked in an inquiring voice and I shrugged.

“Nothing, I just said that we should get some sheep,” I lied and she obviously knew what I had really said because she gave me a sour look. As we left, I didn’t bother looking back at Trixie, figuring she’d probably bugger off somewhere else and start a problem in another town.

As soon as we got back to the library, Twilight sent Spike to start making dinner, then immediately began to lecture me. “Evan, that was completely irresponsible. I have no idea how those gun things work, but what if something went wrong and somepony got hurt?!” Twilight was nearly booming at me.

I shrugged then gulped, kind of feeling guilty about how unsafe I had been, but then just shrugged. “Well… it shut her up,” I laughed and Twilight scowled.

“That was one of the stupidest things you have ever done. I can’t believe you’d do that!” Twilight scolded me and I flinched.

“Okay, I’m sorry,” I apologized and she sighed.
“I just… sometimes I don’t know what to do with you,” Twilight stated angrily and I sighed, then pulled her into a hug.
“I’m sorry mom, I just wasn’t thinking, okay? I’m really sorry,” I apologized and I felt her sigh into my chest as we just stood there, embracing each other in a hug. I could tell it would be a while before she got over this one.

The next morning…

I had gotten to bed pretty late last night, having wanted to complete my work out that I hadn’t finished earlier that morning. Now I was kind of regretting not going to bed before 11pm.

My body felt weak and sluggish, usually rebelling against any action that I wanted to do. I groaned groggily as I staggered up the stairs, taking a brief glance at my watch. It was nearly noon.

I had passed out with yesterday’s clothes still on and they stank a little of old sweat. Looking around, I noticed that no one was home except me.

I moved to the kitchen and grabbed a bowl of Fruity Hoops. “They’re superb!” I laughed silently to myself as I sat down. Today the cereal tasted absolutely wonderful, probably because of my recent withdrawal to it.

After the first bowl was devoured, I poured myself a second, then called it quits. I yawned before leaping onto the couch and grabbing the remote. The TV was kind of puny and Twilight stated that: Television rots your brain.

I highly doubted that was true and flicked on the television. As I browsed through the three channels that we had, I realized that television probably would rot my brain if all I had to watch was nature documentaries and the news.

I quickly turned off the TV, grabbed my Norinco shotgun, and made my way for the door. “I guess I could use some fresh air,” I muttered, then paced outside.

The sky was nice, sunny and clear. I looked back to the landscape and noticed that everypony was missing again. I sighed before moving towards where Trixie had her stage wagon, muttering silent curses to myself.

“I swear to fucking god, if that bitch is ripping on my friends again…” I continued swearing then nearly halted in my path as I noticed that all that was left of Trixie’s stage performance was a few splinters of wood, probably the handy work of my shotgun.

Looking around and still spotting nopony in sight, I scratched my head in confusion, then began to walk towards the opposite end of town. “Maybe she moved her performance to the other end of town.” I started thinking up random possibilities, then stopped as I mentioned zombies.

“Zombies aren’t real,” I told myself. ‘Well not back on our world, but here, unicorns are real,’ my conscience thought back. I quickly racked the slide on my Norinco as my heart began to thump. ‘Zombies can’t be real, zombies can’t be real, zombies can’t be…’

The hairs on the back of my neck prickled up and a shiver went down my spine. My feet pivoted as I spun around and readied for a fight, but was thankful not to see any flesh rotten pony zombies.

Still my senses stayed on high alert. Looking around, I saw nothing. A grey streak of motion caught my upwards attention and I looked up, only to see Derpy crashing downwards in a spiral motion.

“Oh crap!” I muttered. I unloaded the shell in my shotgun and set it aside, then readied myself to catch Derpy… again.

“Derpy! I got yah! Again...” I yelled out to her as she continued to careen downwards. As she got closer, I began to cringe, sure that this collision would be just as painful as yesterday'.

As I felt the impact, my whole body got tense and my feet slid across the ground, but I managed to stay standing. After a few moments, my eyes unclenched and I looked to the shivering mare in my arms. “Derpy… how is it that you continue to find yourself in… crashing predicaments?” I asked and she shrugged.

“Turbulence,” she stated back in her dopey voice and I nodded. “Thanks for saving me again!” she squealed and squeezed me in a tight hug.

“Say Derpy… what are you up to anyway?” I asked, seeing that she didn’t have her mail uniform on.
“Oh, I was gonna come and see if you wanted to play,” she replied and I nodded, then quickly returned to the task at hand.

“Well sure, but first we gotta find everypony… I think there might have been a zombie apocalypse,” I informed her playfully and she gasped in fear.

“Oh no! Really!” she cried out fearfully and I shrugged.

“I dunno. Maybe. I can’t find anypony,” I told her and she grabbed me, then shook me in a frantic way.

“Please, say it isn’t so! What if nopony but us is left! What’ll we do?!” she cried out and I rested a relaxing hand on her shoulder as she hummed about above the ground.

“Well, I don’t think there’s really a zombie apocalypse, but that still doesn’t change the fact that nopony is around,” I explained and Derpy brushed some sweat from her brow with a ‘phew’.

“Don’t worry, I saw a bunch of ponies at the north end of town. I think the circus is in town because there’s a magician there!” she informed me and I groaned.

“Come on Derpy, let’s go!” I said in a lightly angered tone. We rushed through the empty streets and I could already here Trixie’s boastful attitude.

“Bow down before the greatest unicorn that walks the land. You are not worthy to be in his presence!” Trixie yelled out and I gritted my teeth. She sounded worse than yesterday and I thought she would’ve learned her lesson by now.

As we burst around the final corner, I spotted a bigger stage than before with two unicorns on the stage, and that’s when it struck me. The voice that was boasting didn’t belong to Trixie, it was masculine of sorts.

“The Almighty Tristan The Great declares you all his slaves! Any who try to leave will be punished!” he roared and a very dark purple magic shield bubble surrounded the city limits of Ponyville. Whoever this stallion was, he looked kind of like Trixie, except he was a stallion, so his facial features were squared. His fur, like Trixie’s, was blue, but was a darker shade of blue. He didn’t wear a dorky hat like Trixie and let his mane flow freely, his mane being a lighter complexity of blue than his body fur. He was wearing a black cloak that concealed most of his body.

“What the fuck is this shit!” I yelled and everypony’s stare turned to me. That’s when I noticed something else. Trixie was also on stage, though she was on her knees like a slave and had a dog collar around her neck that was attacked to a leash.

“Evan, do that thing like you did yesterday!” Dash called out and I declined by waving my hand.

“Sorry, I can’t. Twilight gave me shit for that yesterday,” I apologized and Dash gasped.

“What?! But it might be the only way we can save Ponyville,” Dash replied and I was lost.

“Wait, hold on! What’s going on?” I asked in a confused tone, still lost with what was happening.

“Trixie has an older brother who’s deranged and…” she was cut off by a thunderous crack of lightning.

“SILENCE! Tristan is not deranged!” the darker blue unicorn on stage roared.

“He’s enslaved the town!” Dash informed me and I shrugged with a baffled look on my face.

“How did he ‘Enslave’ the town. Why didn’t Twilight or somepony just beat him in a magic competition or something?” I asked curiously and Dash pointed over to the stage as the crowd moved to the side, showing me that Twilight, Rarity, Applejack and Fluttershy were all on leashes as well.

“Well what about you?! Why didn’t you do something fast that he couldn’t do?!” I asked and Dash gulped.

“I can’t,” she stated then showed me her back, revealing it to be void of wings. My breath was taken. I didn’t know magic could take away parts of a pony’s body. That’d be like taking away somepony’s leg.

“You gotta do that thing you did yesterday with Trixie!” Dash stated just as Tristan hopped down from the stage.

“HA! He couldn’t do anything that would deter my power!” Tristan laughed and I rolled my eyes just as he tossed a collar at me. “Put that on slave. Everypony in town needs to wear one,” he told me and I spat at the collar.

“I ain’t no slave, I ain’t no pony, and there’s no way in hell I’m putting that thing on like a dog,” I snarled and he laughed.

“You dare challenge Tristan?” he inquired and Dash nodded.

“He sure does!” Dash accepted the challenge for me, even though I didn’t really want to.

“Ha-ha-ha!" His laugh was... weird and seemed very forced. "What could you possibly do that Tristan couldn’t?” He laughed snidely and I groaned furiously at Dash for getting me into this.

Dash gave me a nudge. “Come on, blast him!” she told me and I shook my head. “I can’t do it, it’s too foolish. Twi and I went over this yesterday,” I stated.

“Evan just…” Twilight began but Tristan’s eyes flashed red.

“SILENCE!” He roared and everything seemed to sit still as he turned back to me, his flashing red eyes turning back to a dark violet. “Now show Tristan what you got… ape!” he taunted me and I curled my lips.

“Fine…” I snarled then paced around him so that just in case a pellet of buckshot ricocheted off the ground it wouldn’t hit anypony. I racked the slide, loading a fresh shell into the chamber, then fired it at his hooves but he just stood there, completely undaunted by the show of aggression.

“Beg for mercy!” I snarled and he laughed as his horn glowed in a very dark, almost black, purple aura, then suddenly Derpy was pulled over to him, her body caught in a flashing aura.

“You first,” he ordered as a sickly knife was levitated to Derpy’s neck. I gasped in anger as the knife was pressed against Derpy’s throat, threatening to slit it. “Fall to your knees and beg… beg like a dog,” he ordered.

I gawked for a moment in shock. “Gah… ugh…” was all I managed and the knife pressed threateningly harder against Derpy’s throat. “WAIT!” I yelled with a gasp then tossed my shotgun aside.

I fell to my knees and held my hands forwards as if I was praying to him. “Please… don’t,” I pleaded and he laughed, then spat at me.

“Is that the best you’ve got?! I want to hear you sniveling, grovel before the almighty Tristan!” he boomed. I scurried over to him and placed my hands literally inches before Derpy, who was being held in front of his body, then bowed before him.

“Please, pleasepleaseplease PLEASE! Don’t do that! I beg of you,” I groveled, nearly breaking down into tears. Tristan laughed then tossed Derpy aside before observing my disgraceful state.

“Look at you… completely weak… helpless… worthless,” he taunted then thought to himself before levitating over my shotgun and examining it. “I saw your battle with my younger sister… and I sought through your feelings. You think that you’re tough as nails, but you’re softer than butter on the inside.” He stated, then floated the gun down to me.

I looked up to him and he snickered. “Go ahead… do it. Kill me, kill me in front of all these foals, fillies, and colts,” he taunted, somehow knowing full well that I wouldn’t. He jammed the gun into my hands. “Do it!” he scowled.

Moments past and I just stayed there, on my knees, looking down disgracefully upon myself. “Kill me and the town will be freed! If not, then you’ll be banned from Ponyville forever, forbidden to ever return,” he stated.

I continued to just stay in that exact pose. “Fine, so be it!” he roared, then blasted me with a powerful bolt of energy that emitted from his horn. My shotgun was ripped from my hands as I was propelled out of Ponyville.

The shield barrier opened just enough for me to fly through. As I landed, I expected it to kill me, but instead I was hurtled relentlessly across the ground, tumbling and skipping about painfully.

As my body finally skidded to a stop, I thought the pain was over. Of course, life is brutal, and something crashed into me, sending my body skidding a few feet further. I groaned and gritted my teeth as I lay for minutes, face down in the disgusting dirt. After a a few more minutes, I twisted my view a bit and looked to what had hit me. I spotted Derpy, though she looked brutal. She was lying face up, blood leaking down her mane and covering her face.

Blood stained her fur and her eyes were closed. “Oh god… no please…” I whispered as I painfully crawled over. I collapsed just beside her and felt her neck for a pulse. Luckily she must be a tough mare, because her pulse was strong, but she was unconscious nonetheless. A tear trickled down from my right eye. I could've killed him but I didn't and because of that, Derpy was hurt badly... because of me. My fists clenched in anger and blood seeped out from between my fingers. "Derpy... Derpy I'm so sorry..." I wept painfully and grunted several times in anger. I had let Tristan fuck up one of my best friends... my BEST friend, all because I didn't shoot him.

Severe pain coursed through my body as I stood up and placed Derpy on my shoulder. My truck was in town, so heading to Canterlot to ask Celestia for help was out of the question. Fluttershy had been taken captive, so she wouldn’t be at her cottage.

“What the fuck am I going to do?” I thought to myself as I began to stagger aimlessly. Blood stained through my cargo pants and made apparent of more wounds that I hadn’t known about when I first crash landed.

“I need a healing potion…” I trailed off as my thoughts turned to that of the first healing potion I had ever taken, and perhaps the only one in Equestria who could help me right now…

Ponyville, third person…

Tristan laughed maniacally as he turned the library into his main HQ. “Ah-ha! This is perfect! The perfect throne, for a perfect ruler!” he cheered his triumph, then swallowed dryly.

He looked to Twilight. “You, wench, get me a drink!” Tristan roared. Twilight went to refuse, but the collar around her neck gave her a painful zap. “That’s right, if you disobey me, you’ll get buzzed!” he laughed insanely.

“Yah ain’t bein very nice!” Applejack shot out and Tristan snickered as she too was zapped painfully. Twilight reluctantly began trotting towards the kitchen while Tristan lay back in his seat.

Dash and Fluttershy flapped their wings lightly, giving Tristan a slight, cool breeze. He had recently given them back their wings but only for this exact purpose, anything else would result in a painful zap. He did so enjoy having the competitive pegasus serving him, it was so ironic and cruel, making him relish in his own devilish nature.

“Brother, why are you being like this?” Trixie pleaded and Tristan leaned his neck back with a sly look spread across his face. The gleam of some sort of amulet flashed briefly, making the five element bearer’s gasp in shock, Twilight not being present as she was still fetching Tristan a drink.

“That’s… that’s the alicorn amulet!” Rarity gasped and Tristan nodded in reply.

“Indeed it is. Good eyes,” he stated then rubbed the amulet attentively with his hoof. “With my powers already going through the roof before I found it, I was a respected and well known magician, but after I found it…” he trailed off as a look of evil spread across his face and his eyes flashed a dark shade of red. “Ponies feared me for my abilities. They worshiped me like a god, in fear of what I might do if displeased. Something you’ll all learn very quickly,” he stated then looked to Dash.

“Stop beating those wings so hard! You’ll give me pneumonia!” Tristan scowled and Dash obliged with a burning hate for the stallion.

Everfree forest, Zecora’s hut, Evan’s perspective…

I held the cold, damp cloth to my pained face. Zecora didn’t have enough potion to heal both Derpy and myself, so I had told that she should heal me only enough so that I could manage to properly walk, then use the rest on Derpy.

Though it healed her up very nicely, Derpy was still in mediocre pain when she awoke. Now late in the evening, Derpy had gone back to sleep in hopes of simply sleeping off the pain, while I conversed with Zecora about what to do.

“You are very humble to offer her the majority of the healing supplies,” Zecora expressed her thoughts about me in truth, not rhyming at my request.

“Yeah, well… she needs it more,” I replied and Zecora nodded, knowing that I could cope with the pain far better than Derpy probably could. I grimaced, then applied more pressure to the cloth on my face.

“Can you make more healing potions?” I asked and Zecora nodded.

“Yes, but I will require more ingredients,” she told me. Without her rhyming tune, she was actually quite easy to understand. I stood up painfully and gasped as my body threatened to simply give out on me.

“Come on… let’s get some ingredients then,” I said and Zecora raised an eyebrow.

“Are you sure? It is late, and predators have not ate,” she spoke a rhyme, probably by accident.

“Hey… what have I said about rhyming?” I chuckled with a grimace of pain and she nodded, then grabbed her saddle bags before leading me out of the hut, locking the door behind her.

“There are not many herbs needed to make a healing potion, and are generally easy to find,” she stated, then picked a random flower from the ground.

“What’s that?” I asked and she shook her head.

“It is not an ingredient we need, but its fragrance is nice indeed,” she spoke another rhyme, but before I could reply, I caught a whiff of the flower. It smelt like vanilla and was actually quite nice.

She placed the vanilla smelling flower in her mane and continued to lead me deeper into the forest. The night ambience made me shiver, especially when I heard the howls of wolves.

I had nothing but my fists and boots to fight with and, by my count, that wasn’t a lot. Zecora suddenly bent over in front of me and I accidentally bumped into her, knocking her to the ground. “Shit, sorry… I wasn’t looking,” I apologized, then helped her up.

She looked to the ground with a sigh and pointed to the plants that her body had crushed when I had knocked her over. “We had needed those plants, but now we will need to find another patch. Keep your eyes open.” Luckily she didn’t speak in a rhyme, so I understood her.

We paced further into the forest before finally stopping again. The howls of wolves seemed to get closer and closer with each cry to the moon. As a kid I had always wondered why wolves howled to the moon. “They say that Timberwolves howl to the moon because they miss her… Nightmare Moon,” Zecora answered my question and I raised an eyebrow.

“I’ve heard stories but…” I trailed off and Zecora snickered.

“Let me guess? You thought they were ‘gay’?” she asked and I gave a mixture of a nod and a shake of my head.

“Not quite. I wasn’t exactly sure why she was given such a brutal punishment. I mean, yeah, she turned the world into eternal darkness but, I mean, what’s so bad about nighttime? I mean, the moon is still bright right?” I asked and Zecora snickered.

“Dear colt… err, man. You have much to learn. Nightmare Moon’s night brought the cool temperatures that killed off most plants that thrived in hot conditions. The lack of sunlight, which had provided nutrients, soon started killing off crops and ponies started falling into eternal slumbers,” Zecora told me the story and I gulped with a nervous chuckle.

“Oh… I guess that would settle it… ow,” I muttered as pain shot through my ribs.

“Why did you not just kill him? You seemed willing to kill of Chrysalis without a second thought, so why show this… Tristan, a soft side?” Zecora asked and I gulped.

“I… I uhm… foals were around, and the collateral damage of a shotgun at point-blank would traumatize a foal’s memories forever,” I partly lied. It wasn’t a complete lie, there were foals in the crowd that would be traumatized by it, but the real reason was much more complex. ‘If only I had the chance after he had hurt Derpy, I would’ve gutted him like a fish,’ I thought to myself.

“Well, just remember, those ponies need your help now more than ever and sometimes the right decision isn’t the easiest made,” she informed me. I began wandering in my thoughts and suddenly I had a potion bottle being waved in my face.

“Here, drink this. It should heal the rest of your wounds,” she told me and I nodded, but stopped before taking a sip. I stuck my tongue out in mild disgust. There were chunks of leaves and bits of roots in the potion but I guess I shouldn't be complaining because she had brewed it on the spot.

“What about Derpy, she’s still in pain,” I stated and Zecora nodded before showing me the second bottle that she had made. I nodded in acceptance then tilted back the bottle and chugged back the entirety of the bottle’s contents.

It tasted pretty bad, but the effects were nearly instantaneous. I felt all my wounds seal shut, the pains searing throughout my body immediately stopped, and I felt better overall. “So what now?” I asked and Zecora shrugged.

“We will have to think of a plan, but for now you need to rest,” she offered a plan and I nodded before we started back towards her hut.

Ponyville Library, third person…

Tristan sat and yawned to himself in an un-amused way. “Tristan grows bored, entertain him, wenches!” he ordered in a vulgar tone. Not sure how to entertain him, his ‘servants’ simply looked to him and he scowled silently to himself.

“You, yellow wench, get Tristan some wine! You, pink wench, play some music!" He ordered then thought to himself. Play something... slow and… kinky…” Tristan said as he started to become aroused. Fluttershy immediately rushed off to fetch some wine while Pinkie started to play some ‘kinky’ music with several musical instruments at once.

“Indeed…” Tristan breathed heavily as he tapped his hooves together. “It has been quite some time since Tristan has been… entertained,” he mused to himself as his member started to grow.

“You…” he trailed of and pointed to the group. “Come here and… entertain me,” he ordered and they all stood in confusion, not sure which one he wanted. Tristan rolled his eyes in aggravation. “The pretty one, Tristan wants the pretty one!” he roared like a foal during a temper tantrum and Rarity gulped as she took a regretful step forwards.

“Not you, ugly slut!” he spat and Rarity was nearly heartbroken from being called such vulgar terms. “I want… you,” he licked his lips lustfully, no longer using a third person persona, and again pointed to the group. “Sister… step forwards,” he stated with a deep inhale.

“That’s disgusting!” Dash spat and Rarity chimed in.

“Lust for a relative is just simply repulsive!” Rarity gasped and Applejack looked side to side.

“Yeah… incest is… wrong,” she pitched in, glancing side to side in a hesitation of nervous motion.

“Shut your mouths!” Tristan ordered and motioned for Trixie to step forwards, who slowly walked shamefully forwards. Tristan leaned back and licked his lips while he rubbed his hooves together in anticipation.

Trixie took a deep breath as she stood before him, not making eye contact with her lustful brother. Tristan leaned forwards and placed his right hoof under Trixie’s chin and gently tilted her head up so their eyes locked. “Entertain me, dear sister,” Tristan spoke soft and gentle words.

He once again leaned back with a smug smile on his face as he took a deep, relaxed breath. Trixie turned, not making eye contact with any of the other mares in the room. A lone tear trickled down her face, it wasn’t a tear of sadness, it was a tear of pained shamefulness.

Ever so slowly, she began to sway her flank in a seductive way, all the while keeping her sorrows to herself. Tristan let out a satisfied sigh as he watched his sister contently. For the moment, Trixie pulled her cape down low to conceal the view of her nethers, though that Tristan paid little mind.

“Closer, I want to nearly feel your presence,” Tristan ordered. Trixie let out a quiet sniffle and stepped back so that her flank was a mere three inches from Tristan’s body, and continued her erotic dance.

She constantly wiggled her flank above Tristan’s groin, teasing him in a non-contact way, also driving his urges wild. His member quickly grew to its full length and twitched furiously, thriving for the feel of sex.

“Turn around sister, for I wish to see your face while you dance,” Tristan stated, his vocabulary no longer being in a third person persona whatsoever. Trixie slowly turned and straddled herself above her own brother, still allowing herself a few inches between herself and her brother’s throbbing member.

Trixie swayed her hips from side to side, then would dive at a slow pace, but stop just before her entrance touched the tip of his shaft. A content ‘Mmm’ left Tristan’s mouth as he became extremely aroused.

Now with the need for sex driving his body insane, Tristan placed his fore-hooves at Trixie’s sides, gripping her hips with a gentle hold. “Sister… it’s been too long since we’ve last played,” Tristan stated.

Rarity looked away in disgust. “This is just repulsive. I can’t believe anypony would ever do that with a relative, it’s just… wrong.” The white unicorn nearly gagged. Twilight thought to herself briefly. She had never asked Evan how deeply he believed that she was his mother. He had at times stated that he understood that she was not his true birth mother, but she wondered if he would have the same attitude towards her as Rarity did towards Tristan's disgusting behaviour. She did admit, what Tristan was doing was dastardly and that he should be punished severely, but how, she did not know.

Tristan began to wiggle his hips a little, nearly driven insane by the anticipation of it. Tristan leaned his face towards Trixie’s, but she did not return the action. “Come now sister, remember all the fun times we had back home in the thickets behind our home?” Tristan recalled painful memories for Trixie.

Trixie’s mind burned with the memories of Tristan capturing her body in a levitation spell, then forcing her into sexual acts in the thicket bushes behind their childhood home. She always swore that she’d tell their parents, but Tristan threatened it would not be wise to do so.

A stifled sob emitted from Trixie’s mouth and Tristan cupped her cheek with his hoof. “Come now sister, this is how ponies express love for one another,” Tristan stated and Applejack lashed out.

“AH AIN’T GONNA STAND FER THIS. IT AIN’T RIGHT!” she yelled and the six element bearer’s charged in unison. Tristan’s horn flared and they were knocked back by a propulsion spell.

“You have forgotten your places!” Tristan roared and the six mares felt a painful jolt of electricity surge through their bodies. His horn now fading, the brutal unicorn stallion turned his attention back to his sister.

“Now sister, what say we have some fun?” Tristan asked. Trixie didn’t say anything and Tristan simply forced his lips upon Trixie's. Twilight thought to herself again, ‘Am I forcing myself upon Evan? I know it’s not as severe, but what if I am, in a way, doing this to him? Maybe he feels the same way Trixie does… abused,’ Twilight thought to herself.

In truth, she didn’t know what to think. Evan didn’t show discomfort when Twilight tried to make an advance on him, but he did state that one time that sex with her wouldn’t be right. The thought left her mind immediately as she heard Trixie moan in discomfort.

Tristan forced his tongue into Trixie’s unwilling mouth and explored her depths. The mare tried to pull away, but Tristan held her head close to his and continued slobbering the inside of her mouth with his tongue.

“This is insane, somepony has to stop this!” Dash yelled, but didn’t make a move, knowing full well what would happen. Tristan pulled his mouth away from his sister’s, then looked to her with loving eyes, but his gaze was not returned.

The stallion rested his head on her shoulder before lining up his member with Trixie’s entrance. “Please brother… don’t,” Trixie begged through a sob.

“Sssh sister, I promise that you’ll enjoy it. I’ve learned some new moves since the last time that we…” he trailed off and, with one powerful jolt. He thrusted himself into his sister, her depths taking his full length with the single motion.

Trixie cried out in a mix of pain and pleasure, though mostly pain. Tristan stayed stationary for a moment’s time, savoring the feel of having his sister’s inner walls hug his cock that throbbed inside of her, nearly ready to blow.

“Oh sister… your snatch is so tight.” He tried to talk dirty to spice things up for his unmotivated sister, but all it did was scar her more. He pulled himself out at a sluggish pace, any faster and he would’ve blown.

As his length left her entrance, her walls sealed up again and she was thankful to have him out of her body for the time being. “That was a little too tight for my liking, but I know how to fix that,” Tristan stated, then spat on his hoof and used it to lubricate his cock.

Trixie’s breathing was raspy and filled with sorrowful sobs of shame. “Sssh sister, for I love you so…” Tristan stated then slowly delved himself back inside of her, still on the edge of his orgasm. “Mmm… you’re such a good fuck,” he muttered as he started to slowly thrust himself inside of her, trying furiously to keep himself outside the boundaries of an orgasm.

As he slowly continued his thrusts, Trixie tried painfully to think of something else, but all she could think of was the member being stuff inside of her. She could feel it spreading her walls, leaving, then spreading her again. Each time his cock left her, she felt the need to have him fill her again, though it was a primal, more sexual desire, rather than her actual desire, which was to be rid of him forever.

Not a single moan was emitted from Trixie, which bothered Tristan greatly. “Sister… moan for me. I want to hear your vocal notes of love,” Tristan stated, but as she opened her mouth to moan, all that came out was an emotionally pained sob. Tristan groaned, wanting more than just a cheap fuck.

He lifted his head higher than his sister’s and placed his tongue at the base of her horn. Slowly sliding his tongue upwards, Trixie shivered as pleasure soared through her body.

As the male unicorn’s tongue reached the tip of his sister’s horn, he slowly enveloped her horn with his mouth. Trixie’s mouth opened and a mix of a sob and a moan was emitted. Tristan smiled while he continued to suck off his sister’s horn, ceasing with his cock movements for the moment at hoof.

His head slowly bobbed up and down and Trixie continued to shiver. The six mares present in the room were disgusted by the sight in front of them and they’d all much rather be somewhere else, but Tristan had forbid them to leave, for he needed them to cater to his every will.

As Trixie’s pleasure increased, a feeling was building up in her groin area and Tristan continued his horn sucking until Trixie’s pleasure nearly reached its peak. Her sobbing moans soon ceased and despite her will power, her body gave in. Moans of pleasure were emitted constantly from her mouth. “See sister, I told you that you’d enjoy it,” Tristan stated and Trixie turned her face away in self-pity, hating her body for enjoying the feel of his actions.

The lustful stallion began to pump his sister again, rocking his hips up and down in a paced and slow motion, enjoying her now slick vagina. Trixie began to sniffle again as even more tears fell from her eyes. Tristan began to care even less about his sister’s pleasure as he began to pump his sister harder, quickly building himself up.

As he continued, Trixie’s body began to move by itself. Her hips slapped against his in unison motion. It was as if she had no control over her body as it thrived for the burning desire to achieve an orgasm. Juices seeped from her pussy and dripped to the throne beneath their bodies. A slapping sound started to echo in the room as Tristan's balls started slapping against her rump.

Trixie felt her walls clasping around his cock as he continued to shove himself deeper and deeper with each thrust. She knew he was close, and soon enough, she felt him start to swell. “Tristan, pull out,” Trixie sobbed, but Tristan paid no mind and continued pumping away.

His thrusts became erratic and unpredictable. “Tristan… pull out!” Trixie told him in a stern voice, but still he didn’t pay her any mind. “PULL OUT!” Trixie cried and tried to dismount him, but Tristan’s grip around her hips tightened and he pulled her body down on top of his.

He kept her tight to him, their chests rubbing together as his cock delved to her deepest depths, then he pushed just a bit harder and his cock bottomed out against her cervix. He pulled back, then slammed against her with brutal force, sending Trixie’s body into a relentless orgasm. He hindlegs spasmed and refused to cooperate, while the rest of her body shuddered from the pleasure that was coursing itself through her body.

Climatic moans left Trixie's mouth as she began to mindlessly thrust herself against her brother's shaft, completely lost in her orgasmic state. As her walls clasped themselves against Tristan's cock, he began to grunt loudly and snort as he thrusted against her motions. Pussy juices lathered his cock and made humping her an easy breeze. Squelching noises competed with the music that Pinkie was playing and made the six element bearer' drop their heads in shamefulness, there was nothing they could do to stop this atrocity.

Just as his cock bottomed out against the mare’s cervix for a second time, he let go of his boundaries. His cock swelled up inside of his sister's tight snatch and he grunted loudly as he reached his peak.

Jets of hot, sticky cum blasted into Trixie, first it pushed through her cervix and filled her womb, but with nowhere else to go, it quickly filled up the rest of her cunt. Tristan’s cock continued to surge, blasting out tidal wave after tidal wave of cum. In a matter of seconds he had filled up her vagina and their mixed fluids seeped out of her walls and made a mess of Tristan’s throne and his legs.

Tristan continued to hold her tight as he kissed up and down along his sister’s neck. Having passed her orgasm, Trixie simply lay in her brother’s embrace, sobbing and unable to do anything.

“You may all leave,” Tristan spoke to the others, then tilted his head back and looked to his sister. “But I think you and I have some catching up to do,” he said with a sly grin as he spun her over and mounted her in a doggy style position.

Evan’s perspective…

Rain poured down as I rushed from my truck to the house and immediately through the front door. Just as I closed the final gap between the rain and the dry insides of my house, the overhang of the roof drizzled down a constant stream of water that soaked the back of my neck and gave me an uncomfortable feeling.

I shook my head quickly and frantically, trying to shake out the dampness from the rain. My mother leaned back in her chair an looked at me with intoxicated eyes. “Take a shower already, you stink like shhhit,” she slurred and I rolled my eyes.

“I just got in, give me a second would yah?” I stated as I began to undo the laces to my boots.

“Don’t you get fuckin… lippy wit-h me,” she said and I rolled my eyes as I removed my clean dress boots. “Don’t even think you’re go… going to leave those up here, they stink like fucking shit,” she swore at me.

“They do not. These aren’t even my barn boots.” I retorted and she gave me a sour look.

“Oh, you think you know everything because… you’re a fucking smartass motherfucker, aren’t you?” she yelled in a drunken stoop. I just rolled my eyes and she became angry with my rather simple actions.

“Don’t get fuckng smart assed with me because… you’re think you’re smart huh? Well you don't know that... the government is hiding things from you.” She… I wasn’t sure of what she was asking or what she was saying. “You think because… you don’t fucking know, but I know that when you were young I was…” she trailed off and thought for a second. “Your dad was a deadbeat and that’s why you’re a fucking smart ass!” she yelled, still in a drunken slur.

“Yeah, sure, whatever. I don’t even remember my dad,” I stated truthfully. I had been so young when we moved to my grandma’s that I only had faded memories and pictures of my real father.

“OHHH! So you think that I’m just a fucking drunk and that you’re all the shit because you have a job? Oooh, big shot, getting paid minimum wage for slave labour. Your boss isn’t paying you enough, he’s fucking you over. Quit that job already and get a real one. You have the education to go to college, so go and say fuck the farm!” My mom yelled.

“NO! I’m not just gonna leave Scotty in the dust because you think I should! My boss wouldn’t fuck me over. Yeah, it’s shit pay, but I love my job and I like it!” I yelled back, defending my boss in the process.

“Oh, you think you’re the only one who works hard in this house?! I work hard too!” she stated, straying completely away from the subject of my boss. “I work just as hard as you,” she slurred and I rolled my eyes.

‘Yeah, five hours a day making cheese cake is really labour intensive,’ I thought to myself. “You know what? I’m going outside,” I told her, then slipped my boots back on and went back out into the rain.

Looking to the shop, I noticed that my uncle, grandpa, and my step-dad were drinking socially with each other. I quickly paced over to the shop and hurried inside, trying to dodge the overhang drip, but failing miserably and getting a nasty splash of rain against the back of my neck.

I looked to my three relatives who returned my stare. “She’s drunk,” I stated and my step dad rolled his eyes.

“We know. Why do you think we’re all out here?” he asked, and I rolled my eyes.

“Yeah, well, she’s in an angry drunk mood,” I replied and they all nodded and sipped from their beers in unison.

“Evan,” My Uncle Justin began, “You’re going to learn that when women drink, they get moody and do stupid things.” I nodded in agreement. There were only two woman in my life, my mom and my grandma. My grandma didn’t drink excessively, only having a sip of wine with soda pop from time to time.

“Yeah, well, it’s the reason I don’t have a girlfriend. I don’t need two crazy bitches in my life,” I stated and they all raised their beers.

“Amen to that,” my stepdad stated and they all took a swig from their beers.

Present time, Zecora’s hut…

I burst from my dreams with a loud gasp. Sweat poured down my face despite it being rather cool out. My heartbeat was speedy and thumped heavily in my chest. My breathing was loud and raspy, but I think it was my gasp that woke the other two occupants of the hut.

Derpy was sleeping on the wooden couch with a mattress that Zecora had made while I slept on the floor with a simple sheet resting above some straw. Zecora slept on her bed, which was just a simple pile of straw, stating that it reminded her of her childhood home.

Zecora paced over to me while Derpy leaned over the side of the couch, staring down at me with a worried look. My lips were dry and my throat felt parched. Zecora rested a hoof on my forehead, then scrunched her nose. “No fever… don’t worry, you’re not sick. Bad dreams perhaps?” she asked in her African accent, not rhyming at my constant requests.

“Yeah, it was nothing,” I replied, but this time Derpy spoke up.

“Really? Because I’ve never seen you looking so scared before,” she stated and I groaned.

“She is right, try and talk about it you might?” Zecora accidentally spoke in a rhyme. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to rhyme,” Zecora quickly apologized, but I waved my hand.

“No it’s okay, I understood what you meant. I just… sometimes I don’t like you rhyming because I can’t understand a thing you’re saying,” I replied. She nodded, then spoke again.

“What about your dreams?” she asked, and I shook my head.

“Nothing important, just a distant memory,” I replied truthfully before leaning my head back into the uncomfortable straw. I couldn’t wait to be back in my own bed. Hell, I’d even settle for the living room couch compared to this, but I would give thanks to Zecora for making this straw bedding, it was better than the floor.

“How are we going to beat Tristan?” I asked aloud, and Zecora spoke as she trotted back over to her bed.

“You fate is your own, but if I were you, I’d think of home,” she spoke a complex rhyme that I didn’t quite understand at first. ‘Think of home? The fuck’s that supposed to mean?’

I thought to myself. 'My mom?' and I thought about how constantly she'd be intoxicated. 'Probably not. My truck?' It was stuck in Ponyville, along with all of my guns. 'My house? Twilight’s library? Which home was she talking about? God, this topic is more frustrating than gun laws back home. Someone could literally come to my home, rob me blind, blow up my house and truck, and I wouldn’t be allowed to kill him or even lay a finger on him because it would be assault. Then God forbid if I tried to sue him in court, I wouldn’t have enough evidence. Hell, I wouldn’t even be able to blast him with rocksalt.' I thought to myself quietly.

“Fucking Tristan… God, I should’ve just killed him on the spot,” I muttered angrily.

“Why didn’t you?” Derpy asked curiously, and I shrugged.

“I dunno…” I replied, then motioned for Derpy to lean in for a secret. I whispered into her ear, though not as disturbingly as Fluttershy would. “Back when I first arrived, I considered ponies to just be animals so I’d be able to kill one without second thoughts,” I informed her and she gasped and pulled away.

“You thought that I was just an animal?” she asked sadly and I shook my head.

“No Derpy, that’s not what I’m saying. I’m saying that, back on my world, ponies weren’t super intelligent or anything, so when I showed up here, ponies were just… ponies to me, minus a select few that I really liked, which included you,” I stated truthfully. Really, when I had first arrived, I had taken a friendly liking to the mare. She was dopey, like me, so I could usually relate to her.

“But now that I’ve been here so long, I don’t think that I could just kill one in cold blood for just talking badly to me. Back when I first arrived, I probably would’ve bashed his skull in, but now… I feel almost like he’s the same species, so… it’s harder to get that fury of anger, you know?” I explained.

“You have gentle and loving feelings,” Zecora stated her thoughts, having obviously eavesdropped on our conversation.

“No, I’m tough as nails and hard as a rock, I’m just not heartless is all,” I told her sternly and the zebra shrugged.

“Believe what you wish, but do not forget that love and compassion is a better trait than hatred and anger,” she told me, though I wasn’t totally sure what she had meant. I was never always angry, never. Just a little tough on the outside.

I leaned back and thought about what to do. I couldn’t damn well just kill him in front of the whole town… could I? I wouldn’t be able to beat him in a magic duel, and I couldn’t take the risk that he was faster than me in a race.

“Fuck, I’d just like to fill him full a…” Then it struck me. “I know what we gotta do,” I said and Derpy looked at me with hopeful eyes. “First we need to see some friends of mine… but it’ll be a long walk…"

Author's Notes:

Hey, guys and gals. So quick recap of everything that's happened since we last chatted, MY BROTHER'S TEAM WON THE FOOTBALL CHAMPIONSHIP! I'm so proud of him, I just thought that I'd throw that out there. I also got a new gun, Boito 12ga police style, 7+1 magazine capacity, telescoping stock and pistol grips (Cause the pump has a grip on it to) It's basically a Mossberg 590 clone but it's pretty cool. Anyway other than that I've just been trying to cope with a busted back (Boss thought he was a chiropractor and cracked my back) So that's just my interesting little bits of info. Hey if any of you guys or gals ever want to chat about stuff, don't be affraid to toss out a 'Supp' cause I'm pretty sociable and don't mind talking to people.