Rainbow Dash's E-Mails: Season Three
Chapter 68: 68. nightlife
Previous Chapter Next ChapterRainbow Dash's E-Mails: nightlife
Rainbow hums as she sat on her computer, ready for another e-mail. She has a good date with Adam the other day (yeah, they remain good friends but the mare can have another option if Soarin' isn't available) and is ready for some fun.
"Another week, another e-mail scandal; Rainbow Dash gonna fly off the handle!" Rainbow sang while bringing up an e-mail.
Dear Dash.
While i was listening to the song I Don't Wanna Wait sung by Paula Cole, i noticed that she was constantly saying "do do do do" in the song, but i don't know if it was her or the background singers. I know this is a weird question, but can you at least tell me who it is?
Michael.
Rainbow blinks and answers while typing, "Uh...Paula Cole? Is this a trick question? I don't listen to weird music; I just listen to Knightshade, Shadowbolts or any other rock and roll stuff; Next e-mail!"
Subject: rainbow dash email
Hey miss R to the D
I wonder what nightlife in Ponyville is like. What kind of hip clubs and fun hotspots are there to check out?
Somekindacolt
Sosh CO
Rainbow reads some parts, especially Sosh CO as 'SoshCO!', adding 'makers of weird products and funnier slogan'. We see a 'The Horn Yourself' product from 'soshCO'.
Rainbow types in, explaining, "Well, we only have one cool hotspot in Ponvyille. You may have guessed already that I am talking about..."
We see some hill as Pinkie and Fluttershy are standing on it with Rainbow's voice explaining, "Apple and Mutton Hill."
"Whee." Pinkie said in an unemotional kinda way.
"Yeah, good times," Fluttershy said with a slow nod, getting a bit bored.
Rainbow types some more while saying, "Yep, the hill was jumping all right. Now as far as clubs go, the Ponyville Club is about as kind of hip as it gets! Some towns got party clubs but we got our very own 'bona fide' pwaty cloughb!"
We see a flyer as music is played in the background. The words are 'The Ponyville Club/Ponyville, Equestria's Premiere/PWATY CLOUGHB'/ (not a place for meat eaters'). Rainbow's voice explains, "When I'm going out to that club, I always take off..."
We see Rainbow messing with a shirt in her bedroom as we hear her continue, "...my best shirt, which I put on first."
Rainbow removes her shirt that has her rainbow cutie mark on it with a laugh, popping a button. The mare begins spraying herself with body spray, much to the curiosity of Fluttershy who came in and asking, "Rainbow Dash? Are you putting on body spray?"
Rainbow, holding the black can, snaps, "No way! Cool ponies like me don't wear body spray. This is...uh...the blood...of slain...warrior...Minotaurs, yeah."
"Oh my."
As the scene darknes, Rainbow sprays the 'Minotaur Blood' on herself. Her voice continues, "Of course, the cloughb club place only let the freshest and awesomest ponies inside. But my name must've been laser-etched onto the guest list by now."
Somewhere in Ponyville is Tough Apple, working as a bouncer at the cloughb. He stands behind a velvet rope as Rainbow flies up. The stallions snaps, "Name!"
"Hey, Tough Apple, come on! Drop the act! I got to get into this place." Rainbow insists as Tough hold up a grease-stained bag for Ketch-Up's.
"Hey, yew isn't on 'de list!"
"List; that's just a ketchup-stained bag you're holding!"
"Shucks; don't be hard on yerself!" Tough remarks to Rainbow while laughing like mad.
"Wait, what? Was that a joke that you just made?" Rainbow ask Tough in disbelief before laughing. "Yeah, good one. Okay, how about letting yours truly in, hu?"
"Name?"
"Fine...uh...Spicy Vegetables...Johnson?"
"Eh, close enough! Nice 'ta see ya again, Mr. Johnson!" Tough comments as he unhooks the rope, allowing Rainbow into the club.
Inside the club, Applejack, Golden Harvest and Derpy are dancing with DJ Pon-3 doing some Dj'ing. As dance music is heard, we hear singers singing, the second singer has a robotic voice, speaking under the first, "Smart drinks. These are smart drinks. (These are not smart drinks.) Smart drinks.-" At the bar, Rainbow came in as Applejack slides in behind the bar itself. "—These are smart drinks. (These are definitely not smart drinks.) Have another round. (Don't have another round.) Have another round! (Do not have another round.) These are smart drinks. (These are not smart drinks.) These are smart drinks. (These are definitely not smart drinks.)"
"Howdy! If it ain't mah main mare Spicy Vegetables," Applejack greets Rainbow with a grin.
"Give me the brightest, glowiest drink in the place, AJ." Rainbow said to Applejack with a grin.
"How about one nice Hydra Pants?"
"Oh yeah! I am taking that!"
Applejack reaches under the bar to take out an eyedropper with some green liquid in it. The cowpony comments, "Okay; that would be 17 and 50 bits!"
"Whoa! Sounds like you ponies are having a sale!" Rainbow remarks, impressed by the price of the drink.
On the dance floor of the club, Golden Harvest and Fluttershy are standing, the latter is wearing gloves. Her friend comments in concern, "Doesn't sound like you're having any fun, Fluttershy."
"Oh, I am having a great time. This is my favorite club to go to...and not dance." Fluttershy said to Golden Harvest with a squee. "Sometime I would even think about dancing then not do it. And if I'm feeling really nuts, I would go out on the dance floor and bust some fresh not-dancing."
"Okay, then how about I start busting out some fresh not hanging out with you if you're going to be like that?"
As Golden Harvest heads off, Rainbow Dash dances on the dance floor as the singer continues, "Smart drinks. These are smart drinks."
"Hey there, Dashie," Pinkie is heard saying happily. Sure enough, we see before Rainbow, looking like the pink pony just got up. Pinkie has cinnamon on her face and is wearing her PJs, she is having her eyes closed
"Pinkie, come on! I'm doing my mating dance here!" Rainbow protests to Pinkie whose mumbles some more.
"...more, more...badges..."
"What?"
"Because I got more badges than you." Pinkie mumbles as if having no idea where she is or what she herself is doing.
"Uh, Pinkie Pie; Are you sleeping?" Rainbow asks Pinkie a bit uncomfortable.
"I sold more cookies than you do..."
"Or are you sleeping and dreaming that you're a filly scout.
"Nah, madam; Just Troop in Ponyville," Pinkie mumbles sleepily some more. Rainbow sighs a bit, her friend can be so random when she herself is sleeping.
As DJ Pon 3 continues DJing in her booth, Rainbow's voice said, "And some point at this point during the night, we all gets treated to Spike attempting to freestyle."
Sure enough, we see Spike holding a mic, grinning as he freestyle, saying, "1, 2, 1, 3...about to freestyle...1, 2? 1, 2?"
"As in counting to 2 over and over again."
"Yeah, 1, 2, 1, 2! Here I go! Hang on, 1, 2..."
Rainbow's voice continues, "And of course, no night at the Ponyville Club is complete without me getting thrown out onto my cyan rainbow cutie mark flank."
Sure enough, Rainbow screams as she is thrown out of the club, in some weird undies. As the mare got out, she protest, "Hey, come on, it isn't my fault! It's those lighted floors! I think my pants that I brought for some reason are drawn to them!"
Of course, Rainbow's pants are thrown out, landing on her head and unfolded.
Rainbow types some more on her computer, "And so, that's the nightlife in Ponyville, whoever you are. Of course, there's also the pour rotten milk on Golden Harvest's prized flowers while she's sleeping kind of nightlife, but that's for another e-mail at another time. This has been Rainbow Dash with Rainbow Dash E-Mail 185. Thanks for listening!"
The new paper comes down, bringing this chapter/e-mail to a close.
We see a bag for Ketch-Ups, logo and all in a red background. An announcer exclaims, "Mmmintroducing the Spicy Vegetables; because you ponies just stopped buying the crispoy kind."
At the hill, Pinkie, still sleeping, mumbles, "Okay, fillies, we are in the woods and got no troop leaders. Time to decide who we eat first," The mare takes out a kazoo and opens her mouth as if she's about to eat it.
At her mansion, the Mayor is speaking, "I call to order this meeting of the Ponyville Club. As he you can see..." The mare grins as she held up a motherboard dipped in chocolate. "...I dipped this thing in 70% chocolate!"
The End
Author's note
There's the nightlife in Ponyville; Pretty awesome, eh? In the next chapter/e-mail, Rainbow explains how she's helping the environment but has to deal with Lyra and Bon-Bon who wants her computer shut down for good. Read, review and suggest!