Rainbow Dash's E-Mails: Season Three
Chapter 66: 66. yes, fighting
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Rainbow is once again singing, bringing up her e-mail while doing so, "E-mailin' from the left and to the right, e-mailin' on a Tuuuuesday night!"
So RD you say that i'm random ? that's a good thing guess i rank up there with good ol Pinkie . Also wha are your thoughs on Sonic The hedgehog 'The Fastest thing alive' and to top that he too can break the sound barrier . anyway i've seen you and sonic on the ponynet via google (yes there are pics abou you and sonic not to mention stories as well) anywho I'm random your random were all random top that pinkie . anyway one other question ,I was thinking ,if Im random then what's that make pinkie ?
Adam
Rainbow answers in, "Yes, I am saying that you're random thing so I guess that is a good thing, huh? As for Sonic, never met the hedgehog but he probably sounds cool. Pics of me and this guy; I oughta see those. As for Pinkie, she's the Queen of Randomness; Next e-mail!"
Subject: none
Dear awesome Rainbow Dash.
Can you please show us some of your awesome fighting moves?
Animallover
Bfn SA
After 'Rainbow Dash', the mare comments, "Period. Best sentence ever written." She reads the location as in 'Best friend never, South Aquestria.' Rainbow types in as she said, "Okay, Animallover. I gotta admit, I am one awesome fighter. As a crafty veteran of the fighting game, I will let you in on a little secret: being an awesome fighter doesn't got anything to do with awesome fighting moves!"
Rainbow clears the screen as she continues, "Nowadays, it's the awesome costumes, gimmicks and any pony fighting fueled ranting and raving! My friends and I got our first big break with Ponyville's unlicensed fighting organization: Ponyville Mid-Pro Shirtless Championship Stuff or PMPSCS for short. Of course, that was before a licensed fighting organization gave them a cease and desist order so my career was sadly short-lived. Those guys want me to be one of those lame fighters but yours truly got gimmickier plans."
We see a photograph of Rainbow who wears a crown and an outfit that has one printed on it. The picture s as Rainbow's voice describes it, "Lady Awesome Dasher and her signature move..." We see the mare in her Turnbuckle outfit behind Fluttershy, Rainbow grabs her friend below her own arm. The picture is labeled 'Master of the 1/8 Pony Nelson'. The cyan Pegasus pony describe it, "The 1/8 Pony Nelson!"
Rainbow resumes her typing on her computer as she say, "Back int he days, pretending to be one cool fighter was considered a premium gimmick. Once I got more popular during my short-lived career, my next incarnation was..."
We are inside the arena for the unlicensed thing with a piece of paper with the place's logo taped on sideways. An announcer booms, "And now, hailing from the age of exploration, the namer of nations, the rescuer of artifacts..." The doors swing up as we see Rainbow in an outfit similar to Daring Do's with her coat covered in the same color as he's. We see her fighter name at the bottom, "Daring Do!"
Rainbow poses, wanting applauses but all she got was singers and Gilda who snaps from offscreen, "Booooooo!"
Backing Singers: Daring Do!
Leader Singer: She's plannin' the plans!
Backing Singers: Daring Do!
Lead Singer: She's takin' no crap!
As Rainbow steps forward, throwing pieces of paper at the empty seats, the mare is heard voice-over, "One of my gimmicks that I do is that I always come out of the ring throwing..." One of her papers stop in front of the camera, showing a map of the arena, showing the way from one seat ('here you are') to 'the stall' where the toilet is at; the map is labeled 'Ye Olde Restroom Trail'. "...maps for the crowd that leads to the restroom!"
In the ring, Rainbow held a flag while saying, "Yeah, I claim this weird ring in the name of Daring Do!"
Rainbow taps the flag as it unfurls itself, flapping in imaginary wind that shows the mare's cutie mark with 'the awesome-est' written below it; Gilda, unimpressed, yells out, "Boooooo!"
Rainbow's voice adds, "Back then, my friends would fight me for fun or the whatnot, like my fights with Pinkie Pie!"
We see Pinkie's torso as it shows the mare in read pants that reads '4TH WALL!' in white letters. As the slow turns black, the announcer now says, "Ladies and gentlecolts! Joining me backstage in this arena..." We see a pony standing near the pink pony whose is facing away from the camera. "...is a pony with no introduction needed! Allow me to introduce you to...the 4th Wall Smasher!"
The fighter's name is seen as Pinkie turns to the camera; the mare has cinnamon on her face. She grin while saying, "Oh yeah! Announcer pony, you got that right! Hoo baby! Yeah, 4th Wall Smasher, arena..." Pinkie held up a belt with cupcakes and cakes carved into the buckle. "...my Sugar Belt is on the line! Yeah, right, that's correct! That's what I'm talking about, ponies! I got the drive, the commotion! Wowie, I cannot believe it, hoo, right! Hey, Daring, whatcha goinna did?"
Pinkie raises her mane one each word while continuing, "When you get smashed?!" The mare snaps the elastic band that muffles her speech, "By the 4th Wall Smasher?!"
Back at her computer, Rainbow continues her typing, "That fighting thing often carries into my tag ream phase with Applejack. Naturally, we deal with several misfires before finding our harmony."
We see Rainbow and Applejack...dressed like tourists. The cowpony is in a purple Hawaiian shirt while the Pegasus pony is wearing sunglasses and sunscreen smeared on her face; both ponies are in fishing hats and cameras.
"No pony can stop the Wild Tourists!" Rainbow booms as the name of her team appears at the screen's bottom.
We see a blip and now saw Rainbow and Applejack in black spandex outfits. Rainbow has a headband with a plastic knife in it with pants that has a wooden board, a wrench and the whatnot. Applejack meanwhile has a razor blade tape to her forehead, a tamer tucker into her singlet and an outline of a gun inside it. We see a chainsaw blade behind the cowpony.
"Ye best not 'ta mess with 'de Foreign Object Sisters," Rainbow spoke in a foreign accent as the team's mentioned name is seen at the bottom of the screen.
After another blip, the scene now shows Rainbow and Applejack wearing spiky shoulder pads, the cowpony's singlet is red and has the word 'APPLE' written on it. Her partner has a green Mohawk.
"Shirley and Lurem: The Sanctum of Spiky Ponies!" Rainbow boom as the next team's next is seen at the screen's bottom.
As we go to the announcer, Rainbow's voice said, "Of course, AJ and I finally settled on..."
The screen now shows the two ponies with heavy facepaint, Applejack's singlet reads 'MARE PAINT ACTION'. Rainbow exclaims madly, "The Mare Print Action! 4th Wall Smasher, Gator Legend, once we get into the ring with the insane Miss Unicornia..." We see Rarity in a princess crown and face print that looks like something out of a Disney film. She is holding a can before we go back to the team. "...you two better hope that your guts and your mercy...err, can save your flanks at this Sunday's PayPerViewer Series, yeah!"
The words 'PayPerViewer Series - Sunday PM' appears at the bottom while Rainbow continues, "I didn't flew through mountains and breathe the face printed fumes so that you two can walk away with the title! I'm done, so take me off the air. TAKE ME OFF THE AIR RIGHT NOW!"
After some static, we go back to Pinkie, in her 4th Wall Smasher while holding a microphone. As she speaks, we see T-Shirts, a bumper sticker and a foam thumb promoting her, "Right, yeah! Mare Print Action! You can't resist the power of the screaming 4th Wall 'Emites and 4th Wall 'Emettes out there once I pin you to the ground which is how matches in this unlicensed fighting organization can be legally won when I checked! Gator Legend, take it away!"
Pinkie passes the microphone to her partner...which is Gummy in a wrestling outfit. Rainbow's voice spoke up, "Oh, almost forgot. Gator Legend is actually Pinkie's pet gator Gummy."
"Oh boy, you tell me, Gator, you tell them; Yahoo!"
Back at the computer, Rainbow types in, adding, "After some problems with AJ, I begin fighting as myself, as did the rest of my friends. I have finally gotten what every cool fighter wanted: my own in-ring interview segment; never before had two chairs and a potted plant so transformed the game!"
In a room somewhere in the arena, the announcer is heard, "And now, for another installment of..." The segment's name appears with one part dripping blood, "...Rainbow Dash's Ultimate Awesomeness Fighting!"
We now see the ring that has Rainbow with a microphone. There is a table with a potted plant and a skull on it along with two folding chairs. A red rug sits underneath it all. The mare spoke out, "Oh yeah! Welcome back to the awesomeness darkest craziest regions of my ring! My guest is the current sugar belt holder: Pinkie Pie!"
Pinkie, in her costume for some reason, jumps into the ring, cheering, "Yahoo! Hoo, yeah!" Rainbow hits her with a folding chair, knocking the pink pony right out.
Back at the computer, Rainbow types in, saying, "Yeah, we had a good run until that licensed place forces us to stop our operations. We still manage to do fighting in a secret underground fighting place that I will never tell you ponies where it is in a million years. Now then, Animallover, just stop trying to perfect whatever move you want and get yourself an animal controller stick, a hat, maybe some animal food and begins screaming of how your opponents are mad gophers!"
At the (closed down) arena's doors, we can hear singing as they open to reveal Fluttershy wearing a hat while holding a stick and animal food.
Backing Singers: Animallover!
Lead Singer: She's lovin' the animals!
Backing Singers: Animallover!
Lead Singer: She's starin' out the pests!
Backing Singers: Animallover!
Lead Singer: She's gonna bring ya to your knees!
Backing Singers: She's Daring Do, I mean, Animallover!
"Okay, you gophers. Bring it on!" Fluttershy exclaims in determination, ready to rumble. "Err, if that's okay with you..."
Fluttershy held out the food that shoots out two flames. The new paper comes down, bringing this chapter/e-mail to a close.
The announcer is seen interviewing AJ as he ask, "AJ, do you got anything you wish to add?"
"Yep! Apples apples, five fer five," Applejack calls out to the audience with a grin.
In a field at night, we see Pinkie, Rainbow, Applejack and Fluttershy in their Daring Do, a Mare Print Action outfit, Animallover and the 4th Wall Smasher outfits; The pink pony smiles to her cyan Pegasus pony friend while saying, "Hey, Dashie! Like your Diamond from Fat Donkey outfit."
The End
Author's note
Good chapter; this chapter is in the memory of the fangame 'My Little Pony: Fighting is Magic'. May it rest in peace sorta; in the next chapter/e-mail, Rainbow shows us how to make a 'Middle School Appropriate' diorama. Read, review and suggest!