Romance and the Fate of Equestria

I've said once or twice that nothing that happens post-season 2 will have an impact on the story. I've said the same thing about other fanfics I've written wherein the source material added new installments while I was still in the middle. And inevitably, the new additions lead me to say, "well, maybe not quite nothing."

For instance, "One Bad Apple" showed us the color of Sweetie Belle's magic aura—pale green, the exact same color as her eyes, nicely exotic—and I implemented that. That episode also showed that movie theaters exist; I immediately jumped on that revelation and didn't let go. And from that same episode, I really like Babs. I might find a way to write her into this story… operative word being "might", because I can't really think of a good reason to introduce her at this juncture. If I do introduce her, it'll be under the assumption that nothing she's actually done on the show thus far actually happened—so I'll have to do it delicately and carefully, the way you introduce an OC.

Moving on, the Saddle Arabians seen at the end of "Magic Duel", who are not only from a faraway land but are, by all appearances, horses rather than ponies—they definitely served as the inspiration for a portion of the world-building I'll be doing later in the story. I've already mentioned a Big Daddy Rainbow, and now that Rainbow's dad has actually appeared on the show, I might feel free to mention him more often.

And of course, Discord will reawaken… but I had that idea looooong before that episode aired (didn't we all?).

I will, however, still be using "immortal" rather than "alicorn". I know the latter has always been fanon and most people were overjoyed to finally hear it used on the show, but it really never satisfied me. If it's canon it's canon; if I ever write a story that takes place outside the Romance and the Fate of Equestria continuity, I'll suck it up and use "alicorn". But for this one, I hope you'll accept my use of "immortal", which predates the official term's officialness. You know what else I don't like? "Hooficure". How utterly lame is that? In season 1, Rarity mentioned getting a "pony-pedi". Now that's clever. Beats the hell out of "hooficure", at least.

ANYWAY, just wanted to… you know, get all that out of my system. At this rate, my rants will become longer than the actual chapters…

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Sweetie Belle pinned Featherweight against the arm of a small sofa. "I always wondered why they called this a 'loveseat'," she said. "But I'm finding you irresistible right now…"

They leaned steadily toward each other until their lips met. At that very moment, both of them practically jumped out of their skin as an air horn was set off mere inches away.

Sweetie Belle and Featherweight turned, utterly jolted, to Apple Bloom, whose hoof was still placed dangerously close to the horn's trigger. "No makin' out in the clubhouse," she said matter-of-factly.

Sweetie Belle sighed. "Oh, come on, Apple Bloom. He's my boyfriend…"

"Well, he can be your boyfriend without touchin' ya," Apple Bloom said. "Come on… there's ponies here. Show some respect." She nodded toward Scootaloo, Twist, and Truffle Shuffle, who were sitting around a little round table, each engrossed in a different magazine.

"Don't make me have to put up a big sign or anything," Apple Bloom went on. "Let's just accept that as a rule: no makin' out in the clubhouse."

"Twist and Truffle Shuffle make out in the clubhouse," Sweetie Belle grumbled.

Apple Bloom looked expectantly at those two, who looked away in embarrassment. "It'th, you know, tho much more private than anyplathe elthe in town…" Twist tried to explain.

As Twist trailed off, Apple Bloom stepped up to the table and honked the air horn twice, once in Twist's face and again in Truffle Shuffle's. "I ain't nothin' if I ain't fair," she said cheerfully.

"Thanks," Truffle Shuffle muttered.

"Apprethiate that," Twist grumbled, digging her hoof in her ear.

Sweetie Belle was still scowling.

"Oh, all right!" Apple Bloom said. "You can make out in the clubhouse, just make sure you're alone in the clubhouse, all right? Now how's about you two separate a little?"

She stared until Sweetie Belle disentangled herself from Featherweight's embrace and sat next to him on the sofa, as close as she could get without touching him.

"There ya go," Apple Bloom said, pleased. "I've always felt that the world would be a better place if some ponies would ratchet down on the PDA. I know I've never said it before, but it's true, I've felt it. Just show a modicum of basic decency toward your fellow ponies, would ya?" She beamed toothily.

"Modicum?" Scootaloo wondered.

"Hey, Scoot," Truffle Shuffle whispered. "Remind me again what she's doing here?"

They both looked at Silver Spoon, who was on a stool in the corner, perusing a comic book.

"I never took you for the type to talk about somepony behind their back, Truffle Shuffle," Scootaloo said audibly.

Silver Spoon glanced up, and Truffle Shuffle flushed.

"She's just here to make some friends, all right?" Scootaloo said. "Go easy on her, she's had a rough time getting here. Moving around behind Diamond Tiara's back can't be easy or fun. Or necessary, but that's a conversation for another day. The important thing is for her to feel among friends."

"I think it'th a thwell idea," Twist offered. "Why don't you come over here, Thilver Thpoon?"

Hesitating with every step, Silver Spoon joined them at the little table.

"Nice to finally have you in here, Twist," Apple Bloom said, hugging her. "I feel bad… you and me were supposed to be best friends, and then I founded the Crusaders and kinda forgot about ya…"

"Aw, that'th okay, Apple Bloom. You've had important work to do." She slapped Apple Bloom's flank playfully.

"Oh, sure have. You have no idea the stuff we've gotten up to lately," Apple Bloom muttered.

"Yeah," Twist said, the remark going over her head. "And I haven't been lonely… I mean, I've got the thweetetht boyfriend in Equethtria…" She pulled Truffle Shuffle into a crushing embrace.

"So, um…" Silver Spoon began, freezing when all eyes turned to her. She coughed and continued. "Um, you two, you've been going out for how long?"

"Oh, almotht a year," Twist said dreamily.

"Wow," Silver Spoon said in astonishment. "That's like… eternity. How… how do you…?"

Twist shrugged. "I dunno. We're in love."

"Sure, sure, but still…" Silver Spoon muttered. "That's just… not normal. I mean, for our age group. Shouldn't you have gotten sick of each other in, like, a week?"

Truffle Shuffle glared. "Listen, you might—"

"We're jutht one of the lucky oneth, I gueth," Twist said hastily.

Truffle Shuffle closed his magazine and stalked away toward the clubhouse's bookshelf.

"Thorry," Twist whispered to Silver Spoon. "Truffle Thuffle ith really theriouth about commitment. He thinkth that changing a cruth from one week to another, like motht ponieth our age do, ith nothing thort of a crime againtht nature. Doethn't factor into it all the hormoneth involved…" She grinned. "Workth for me; it meanth I get to keep him!"

Silver Spoon shook her head in disbelief. "I can't even imagine… I don't think I'd even want to imagine having a boyfriend that serious. You two must be insanely mature."

Twist shrugged. "Mature… or really, really in love. Either way…"

"Yeah," Silver Spoon said, inspecting Twist closely. "Hey Twist, you ever think about contact lenses?"

"Um, no," Twist said nervously. "Why?"

"Oh, I was just… you know," Silver Spoon muttered. "It's just that if you ditched the glasses and maybe did something about your mane, you'd actually be really gorgeous."

"You think?" Twist said, surprised. "Um… I mean, no, I don't wanna do that. Thith…" she gestured to herself. "Thith ith what I look like."

"Yeah, well, you look like a dork," Silver Spoon retorted. "You could so easily be something else, but you're locked into 'dork' right now."

"Mm-hmm," Twist said coldly.

"Look, I'm not being shallow or anything here. You'd feel like less of a dork if you looked less like one. Don't you think?" Silver Spoon circled Twist anxiously. "But the way you present yourself, you obviously have no self-confidence whatsoever. And the key to self-confidence is to care about what you look like. This horrible haircut has to be dealt with and the glasses gotta go."

Twist stared blankly. "Um… don't you have…?" She tapped her hoof against the lenses of Silver Spoon's glasses.

"Yes, yes, I wear glasses," Silver Spoon said. "But look at me…" She pulled the glasses off. "Come on, seriously, look. How generically cute can a pony get, right? I look exactly like everypony else, so the glasses give me character." She put them back on. "But you, you have very striking looks, but the glasses hide it. It's a mask, a barrier that nopony who's looking at your face can take you seriously through." She leaned in, looking pleading and hopeful. "I… I can fix all that for you. It'd be my pleasure. What do you say?"

Twist scowled. "How about 'no'?" She pulled back her chair and started to walk away.

"Hey, look, I'm just trying to be nice here!" Silver Spoon protested.

That remark seemed to genuinely throw Twist off-balance; she snapped her head around to stare at Silver Spoon in wide-eyed disbelief. "You… you are?"

"Oh, what, have I offended you?" Silver Spoon fumed. "Well ya know what, you offend me. 'Cause you're this totally good-looking filly doing everything she possibly can to be NOT good-looking! The nerd glasses, the hair, the terrible posture, the cystic acne, these are all things that can go away if you'd just let them! I bet your lisp isn't even real."

Twist glared.

"Okay, okay, the lisp is real," Silver Spoon submitted. "But you… I don't know… you have the good fortune of being this awesome exotic beauty, and, and, and you're taking that good fortune and, like, spitting in its face! Spitting!"

Twist's expression softened. She seemed to be genuinely thinking that over.

"Don't you want to be everything you possibly can be?" Silver Spoon said. "I know that's what I want to do. And I don't have much to work with." She briefly glanced backward at her cutie mark, one that matched her name exactly, but quickly shook her head and turned to Truffle Shuffle. "Hey, Shuffle Wuffle! You love Twist, right? 'Cause she's really great and really special. But don't you think you'd love her even more if she was also good-looking? Back me up on this."

Truffle Shuffle stared at Silver Spoon for a brief moment, then walked over to Apple Bloom. "Get… her… OUT OF HERE!" he enunciated furiously, thrusting an accusatory hoof at Silver Spoon.

"No, no!" Twist peeped. "It'th okay… let her thtay."

Twist grabbed Truffle Shuffle's shoulders firmly and leaned down to kiss him on the mouth. "That'th all I needed to hear," she whispered. She turned to Silver Spoon. "Tho… what would you do about my hair?"

"Um…" Silver Spoon muttered. "Off the top of my head, I don't really know. We could brainstorm for a bit."

"Okay!" Twist said brightly. "Why don't we meet thometime and do that?"

"Uh, okay," Silver Spoon said uncertainly.

"All right! I'll come find you." Twist started out the clubhouse door. "Come on, babe."

"Where are we going?" Truffle Shuffle demanded, following her.

"Doethn't matter. But around here, well, they got ruleth…" She winked and clicked her tongue.

"Ohhh…"

As soon as Twist and Truffle Shuffle disappeared down the wooden stairs, Silver Spoon collapsed into a chair and hunched herself over.

"That was exhausting!" she squeaked. "The way they were looking down on me, like… like… I don't know. And… I know she warmed up to me near the end there, but… Przewalski, I've never felt so uncool in my life!"

"Nopony thinks you're uncool," Scootaloo said breezily. "You just need some work in the area of 'not saying mean things'. Not a lot of work, just… okay, a lot of work. Like… a lot. Like, a lot, a lot. And I mean… a lot, a lot, a lot."

"Thank you, I get it," Silver Spoon grumbled.

"You did good, Silv," Apple Bloom said gently. "Like ya said, Twist warmed up to what you were sayin'. I'm glad you decided to make friends with us, I really am, 'cause friends gotta be willing to teach and to learn. You're doin' both pretty well already." She pounded Silver Spoon's shoulder, in a friendly way but hard enough to make her flinch.

"HEY!" Apple Bloom roared suddenly. "WHAT'D I JUST TELL YOU?"

She leveled her air horn at Sweetie Belle and Featherweight, who split apart and sat facing forward on the loveseat, Sweetie looking resignedly indignant and Featherweight quivering with panic.