"I said, would you like a muffin?" Repeated the ancient and wizened voice of Duke Dusk. He did not look pleased... Not that he is ever pleased, but right now he looked more not pleased then usual.

~please don't take what ever happened out on me. Pleeeease don't.~ I quietly beg in my mind

"Nothing has made me upset recently Ryze..." He said leaning forward revealing his familiar (yet strangely different) face from the shadows cast over him by his gem-encrusted throne.

I was only slightly unsettled by the dukes invasion of my mind,"Oh that is just great my lord! Well if you don't need me I will go back to my st-"

"Oh no... Please, join me for tea Ryze. After all, you never know when the next time you get the chance to have a nice cup of tea."

I give a totally-not-forced-grin as I say," Why of course I'll join you for tea my lord! Who wouldn't?"
~Duke Dusk is the best! Duke Dusk is the beacon we all strive for! Duke Dusk! Duke Dusk! I am the circle! I AM THE CIRCLE!~ I think as loud as I can to drown out the horrible thoughts of my near future.( Which most likely involves h- ~DELICIOUSCEREAL~)

The tea was bland and bitter, but you would never see me complain about it... Atleast not in front of the Duke.
I have no idea what is going through his sick mind, but I know it can't be good. I have only one tactic to resort to... The scapegoat

"Do you remember that mishap with the 6 headed basilisk? Well..." I slurp my tea. "Entirely Annie's fault, I knew I shouldn't have trusted her with that gemstone, but she was so...Persuasive! And don't get me started on Nike's anti-"

"Enough, This isn't a business meeting Ryze..." Dusk said with a low chuckle. "This is simply a reward for doing such a good job!"

"Oh thank you my lord! Nashyorn is truly blessed to have such a benevolent leader!" I grovel, using all my will power to stop my hand from shaking in relief.

"In fact I don't think I will require the services of a Grim-Wizard for awhile...Not for a year at least!" He announced looking at me small smile, as if to say," I think we both know where this is going."

~........Horseapples.~ My terror stricken brain thought.

"I am so sorry Derpy, but I don't have any muffins... Perhaps if you come by at a later ti-"

"Are you okay twilight? You look a little... Peeved. Is it that time of the week again?" Derpy looked at me suspiciously, and rightly so! I was kinda out off my mind when I couldn't find any friendship lesson worthy problems after all.

"I'm...I'm fine derpy... I just have to deal with this awful book that I just can't get rid of!" I shout.

"okay... Why don't you just let me return it to the book to who sent it? I was the one who delivered it here after all."

" I can't just return it to sender derpy... I have to...I -" A Brilliant Idea came to me in a flash of inspiration. I grinned as I nudge Derpy out of the library.

"what are yo-"

"Oh look at the time! I have to go... Wash my tail? Yes! Wash my tail!" I say giving a nervous smile after I push her out the door.

"Bu-But muffins...." Derpy gives me a pleading look just before I shut the door.

Now was the time for some Reverse-Thaumaequrgy.

Magic in Equestria comes in many different strains, or...Flavors if you will. There are obvious forms to be sure, such as unicorn magic, but there are more subtle magics that are harder to identify. If you have enough talent in magic you can see most magic if you try hard enough. However, if you want to look deeper in magic you need knowledge of thaumaequrgy.

Thaumaequrgy was the knowledge of the use of Spell-sight. Spell-sight allows you look inside the inside a flavor of a type of magic so that you can understand it better. Usually it is used to observe the quality and function of enchanted items or to determine if somepony is cheating through magical means. The process of unraveling this kind of magic is a long ridiculous drawn-out process at the best of times. Which is quite rare, and when it does goes wrong, whatever is enchanted will always be destroyed, other then that... Literally anything else can happen.

~should I do thi-

Everything is going to be fine, Clover.~

"Everything is going to be fine!" I say as I prepare the ritual.

I figured I had 3 options. Option one: Assume fetal position, go to happy place. Option two: Tell the "great" Duke Dusk to partake in an anatomically impossible action involving where stick his face and zap him in the face with some Grim-Wizard magic. Option three: Throw myself out the window behind the dukes throne and hope for a swift death... Who am I kidding! Option three it is!

"Is that a space duck my lord?!" I shout point at the ceiling.

I make a mad dash for that gaudy piece of trash that tyrant calls a throne. I crash through the stained glass ecstatic to see ground rush to meet me head on, much like myself toward Charlotta, The towns resident whore. (Don't you judge me!)

The plunge was remarkably short however, as I began to un-plunge and un-crash through the stained glass window. One of the many things I didn't know about the Duke was that he had temporal powers.

"drol ym kcud ecaps a that sI!?" I un-shout as I resume my seat, the expression on my face completely at odds with the feelings I would be having if the Duke's power had not effect my emotions as well as speech.

"Oh Ryze... Now what should I do with you?"Dusk said with a trace of whimsy," Give your hair sentience and the ability to strangle you perhaps? It's quite obvious how badly you abuse it." (Oh what a low blow! So what if I don't really have a choice of going to a barber to get a haircut due to my status of being a Grim-wizard and know too many mirror demons to be able to stare at my mirror long enough to give myself decent cut?)

"Why not go with a classic?" Dusk says to him-self as he waves his hand towards me just as I unslurp my tea.(which was just as bland coming out as it was going in.)

"Are you sure you sure you don't want a muffin Ryze?" He asked me.

"You and your muffin can just go fu-" Before I could finish my last words in nashyorn Dusk waved his hand and then I just... wasn't.

And then I was.