Fluttershy’s massive, bright-blue eyes were about to pop out of her skull. It’s impossible, she thought, no creature like that exists, not even in the Everfree Forest!

And yet, there it was: two legs, dressed in some sort of pants colored to blend in with the rest of the forest, were tucked beneath the body.  Two arms sprouted from an elongated torso, also clad in the strangely-colored cloth.  A head, covered in some hard, black, outer shell, topped it all off.  Beyond that, she couldn’t see much.  It was all wrapped in some green cloth and rope, twisted around the creature’s body.  It was bipedal, she could see that much, but with that casing on its head, how did it talk?  Or eat?  Or hear?  

It stirred with a mild grunt, and she jumped back with a slight “Eep!”  But the creature settled again, one of its hands subconsciously gripping the grass by its side and pulling.  It’s strong, she realized as she watched it pull, stronger than me, maybe even stronger than Applejack!  This was too much.  Something that ridiculously strong had to be dangerous.  She had to leave, maybe find Rainbow Dash; surely she would know what to…

The creature stirredwith a low moan, and she jumped back again.  But this time, the moan was different.  It seemed…pained.  Yes, that was the word, pained.  Something had happened to the creature: it wasn’t just sleeping, it was hurt!  She bit her lip in fear.  She should just turn around.  She had no idea what this creature was capable of, no idea what it would do when it woke up.

But…

“But I am the element of kindness,” she said, quivering.  It was her job to care for any creature, no matter the danger, no matter the risk, come rain or shine.  Just because she didn’t know a certain creature didn’t make her duty any less important.

With a scared little whistle, she summoned the birds and furry things of the forest.  Most took one look at the thing and ran off, but some stayed behind and picked up parts of the cloth it was tangled in, managing to create a sort of makeshift stretcher to carry it in.  “C’mon little ones!” She said, trying to sound sure of herself and failing.  “We have another…widdle…fuzzy…kins who needs our help!”

Shooting unsure glances over their shoulders, the animals of the forest obliged, beginning the long journey back to Fluttershy’s cottage with their strange cargo.

Captain Vance had seen a lot of things during his time with the United States Marine Corps, most of them terrible, some good.  The little Afghani girl with the chunk of shrapnel in her shoulder, crying for her mother as she bled to death on a stretcher in a MASH unit would fall in the former category (and, in fact, kept him up most nights), whereas the sun setting over the Himalayan mountains that next week would definitely wind up in the latter.  Vance had seen the towering spires of Baghdad, the rolling dunes of the Somali desert, and one time on vacation, he even saw the view from the top of the Empire State Building.  By the time he turned forty, his fifteenth year in the Corps, he just about figured he had seen all there was available for a man to see on Earth.

And then he met the man with the slicked-back hair, leather jacket, and impossibly ancient eyes.  Since then, things had gotten weird.

Now, he had seen the twin suns of Beta Taurus rising over the methane gas plains of the planet KXY-7, two-hundred thousand light years from Earth.  He had seen the Pict'lan people of Earth 904, who, lacking properly formed vocal chords in their meter-long necks, communicated entirely with hand motions and body language.  He had fought dozens of exotic enemies from other worlds and other Earths and Earths that should not be but still were.  He had seen the sun swallow the Earth whole while sitting from the comfort of a balcony on a luxury yacht in the Sea of Tranquility on the moon (now an actual sea, thanks to terraforming) courtesy of the man in the leather jacket.  He had met versions of himself with dog ears and twenty toes, or who grew up in a household where his old man didn't have that heart attack and keel over on the assembly line when he was fourteen, and even gotten closure with an ex-wife who died not four months ago with one last walk along the beaches of Oahu-19.  

And still, despite this, despite all he had seen, hands down the weirdest thing he'd ever seen had to be the flock of cartoon-sparrows decorating the massive, pink tree in the center of his base.

"It's real pretty, isn't it, sir?"  The private next to him asked, looking up from cleaning his M4 Assault Rifle.

"Oh God, he's dropped me off in a little girl's head," Vance grumbled, ignoring the private and rubbing his temples.

"Close, but no cigar, Cap'm."  A familiar voice said in its usual, joking tone.  

Ignoring his nerves, Vance whirled around and screamed: "Atten-HUT!"  Every single man in the camp immediately joined the Captain in a massive, platoon-wide salute.  The man in the leather jacket grimaced, but Vance just smiled right on back: this was one of the few things he knew could get under the semi-omnipotent bastard's skin.  "At ease, please," the man in the leather jacket sighed, and instantly every man returned to what they had been doing, reverting to their relaxed positions almost simultaneously.  "Vance, why do you insist on doing the whole 'salute' thing?  I mean, honestly?"

"You are my superior officer here, sir," Vance replied, standing ramrod straight with his chest thrust out in a position honed by years of military life.  "You are a Major, after all."

"I toldja that was just a ceremonial position your general gave me to keep your damned bureaucracy happy," the man in the leather jacket grumbled, sticking his hands in his pockets and delivering a good kick to a rock by his feet.  “It’s a freakin’ joke.”

"I think you'll find we don't make jokes in the Corps very often, sir."  

"Yeah, I figured that out.  And cut the 'sir' crap, seriously."

"Yes sir, Mr. Swarm, sir."

Swarm grinned at that one.  "You're saying that wasn't a joke just then?"

Vance just grinned back.

"Fine.  Now, how you been settling in, Vance?"

"Oh, perfectly fine, sir.  The paratroopers should be arriving to reinforce our outer perimeter after they’ve patrolled the area for enemy contacts, and the…uh…” despite everything he'd seen, there were some things Vance knew he could never get used to, "…The local fauna have been a big help."

"Didja like the deer who led you to this site?"

"Bit of a corny touch, really: made me feel like I walked into a Disney movie.  But still, helpful.”

"Good to know you and your boys are getting comfortable."

"Yes sir, and don’t worry: once the paratroopers secure the area, we’ll be ready to guard the…creatures of this world."

“Now,” Swarm grinned, “What will you be guarding?”

Vance’s smile turned into a grimace, “Dontcha dare make me say it.”

“You know I can.  Just do yourself a favor and say it.”

The Captain struggled to keep his face from twisting into a look of absolute disgust, as if he’d just sipped a sugar-laden cup of Kool-Aid handed to him by a precocious little girl, now smiling up at him with a semi-toothless grin as she waited to hear how much he loved it.  “We will be ready to guard these…little…ponies.”

“Now, was that so hard?”

“Don’t make me kick your semi-omnipotent ass, son.”

“You’re welcome to try, little one.” Next Chapter: Chapter II: At Fluttershy's Cottage Estimated time remaining: 4 Hours, 9 Minutes