For such a short distance, it was a long, achingly slow walk over to the library. Emotions waged violent war back and forth in my skull, with the twisting, cold sensation dominating my chest. Damn it.

Part of me wanted to scream in violent fury, lashing out at everything even vaguely close to me until all was as broken as my chest felt. They had gone and specifically done the one thing I had left for the week in the first place for. They supposedly hadn't been 'ready' for sexual interactions yet, but then they turned around and rutted each other the moment I left! Guess that showed me where I stood with them. Probably screwed up the herd aspect, too, making me an unofficial 'third wheel' for who knows how long. Everything felt like it was done just to spite me.

The other part of me acknowledged Fluttershy's sadness and realized she wasn't just using me to get at Twilight. It had probably been one of those 'heat of the moment' choices and maybe they both truly regretted it. I still came to the obvious realization, at least consciously, that I was far from the 'pivot point' of the herd. Heh. They made it without me, after all. You don't get much more non-essential than that. Part of me realized that me thinking otherwise, even subconsciously, was a bad thing. So that made this a good thing, considering. That logic kind of made my head hurt. Well, hurt more.

Finally, a smaller, quieter part of me was glad it turned out this way. I wanted them both to be happy, and they most certainly were with each other. This was a natural part of their society. I was 'supposed' to just accept what the females wanted, and a certain sense of comfortable familiarity was involved. It felt 'safer' the less choices I was responsible for. I was less likely to screw up then. When not trying to repair, build, or destroy something, I was fairly hit or miss with making 'good' decisions.

All three viewpoints battled fairly equally in my mind. Then I walked into the celery stand, smashing my muzzle into it and flailing to fix my trajectory. That worsened it, of course, and I drifted sideways into a pile of newspapers instead. Well, some things would never change.

Blinking, I watched as several newspapers drifted around my fallen self, one landing on my face a moment later. Manehatten Monthly? "Hey, watch out yoo oaf! These ah’ sellin' bad enough without yoo knockin' a bunch over and gettin' ‘em dirty!" the mare next to the pile shouted at me in a rather strange accent. I winced and rubbed at my temple, then tried to pull myself to my hooves again.

Applejack ran up and helped me to my hooves, frowning at the unicorn mare as she levitated her papers back into a neat pile. She had a minty coat, a little darker shade than what Lyra sported. Her mane was forest green instead, however, and quite a bit longer. I gave the mare a thankful nod, but was surprised when Applejack tossed out, "Ya should be more polite, Miss! It was an honest accident."

"Gah. I don't need yoo whinin' at me, too! Ponies ah’ so rude here!" she spat out, glaring at Applejack.

Another pony walked past at that point, sporting a rather calming purple coat and mulberry mane that matched her eyes. She squinted at the newspaper for a moment before the seller smiled and turned. "Ah! Would yoo like ta purchase one o' these fine papers?" she inquired, instantly turning on the cheery attitude. Joy.

To my surprise, her potential customer frowned at the paper a moment later before glaring up at the mare. "Yer ah lyin' sack of hogwash, ya phony! Hogwash!" she managed to slur out, flushing lightly in the cheeks as she exhaled afterwards. Er, what? She hacked, and then spat at the unicorn mare's hooves before stomping off angrily.

"See?! Ah've been gettin' that all day!" the now irate newspaper mare yelped, pointing after the departing mare with some sort of grapes and berries for a Cutie Mark, it looked like. That was weird. Glancing down at the newspaper, I read the main story's heading.

Manehatten? Maybe that was a city in Equestria. Looking down further, I noticed the large print main headline read, "Huge Fiasco in Canterlot! Changeling Scare Makes Some Question Fancypants' Involvement!" Oh.

Applejack snorted as well a moment later. "Manehatten, too?! That's 'cause it is ah load o' hogwash! Mender ain't no changelin'. He's ah hero ta this town, an' we don't take kindly ta slander," she pointed out, surprising me again. Honestly, I had no idea why I had called her backstabbing. My head hurt, though, and made it hard to think.

"There ain't no bias here! Yoo're crazy! We're just reportin' what we saw, not takin' sides in it. This whole town is biased, ya know? Gah. Maybe this trip was a waste o' time," she groaned. Almost as big a waste of time as talking with her still was.

Shaking my head, I just walked past the whiny mare and continued on my way to the library. It was barely past noon at this point and I already felt like crawling back into bed. Heh. Maybe I should just pick Sweetie instead and say screw it? The little filly in question outpaced all the others and was still hot on my hooves, which certainly showed loyalty where it mattered. Or misplaced obsession. I hadn't really decided yet. Of course, in the long run, did it matter?

Staring at the wooden door for a moment, I hesitated finally. I hadn't seen Twilight for almost a full week now. She hadn't even bothered to come to the welcome back ceremony despite that fact. But I also knew she wasn't feeling well, which I could understand. Closing my eyes, I fought back the sudden, uncharacteristic irritation and short temper I found myself stuck with. Just calm down, Mender. The Nirru thing was right for once. Freaking out about things wasn't going to make things better. I should either just accept what happened and move on with the relationship, or not accept it and walk away. Getting pissed and bashing things apart wasn't the answer, no matter how I felt.

My eyes softened as I opened them again. Who was I kidding? Like I was really going to 'walk away' at this point. It left a bad taste in my mouth and I sighed, looking up at the window again. The others caught up with me at that point, Rainbow looking uncharacteristically concerned instead.

"Mender, are you okay? Well, I mean, I know you're not 'okay' really, but, uh, are you sure this is a good idea?" she asked hesitantly. Crap. I had suppressed the link to them all as best I could, but I forgot about that 'something extra' she had linking to me, too. She knew I was an abysmal mess on the inside, I suddenly realized.

Fluttershy gave a quiet whimper, and I sighed again, glancing over at the cyan mare and shaking my head. "Twilight's not feeling good, and that takes priority at the moment over pretty much everything else. We all want to help her, right? Plus, I think it would help if she and Fluttershy talked about things," I pointed out, carefully choosing my wording to avoid what I actually thought.

As expected, she didn't look exactly pleased with my answer, but that much was irrelevant. Turning back towards the door, I stared at the wood for another second before extending a hoof out and knocking gently.

Nothing happened. I waited for a good thirty seconds, my ears perking up and twitching lightly as I listened. "Huh. Maybe she's not home?" Rarity asked softly, looking a bit sad at the door. That was weird…

Rainbow frowned as well and took to the air, zipping to the upstairs window and looking through. "Uh, she's not in her bedroom..." she reported a moment later.

Bringing up the link controls again, I peeked at the GPS location of Twilight's signal. That was all I could access without a full link to the mare, but that was enough for now. "She's in the basement, the link says," I reported, glancing over at the tiny window at the base of the structure that led to there.

"Being in the freezing basement all the time probably isn't helping," Rarity muttered, sounding a bit irritated now at her friend.

Applejack trotted over to the window in the basement and knocked softly on it. I waited for a second before I saw the orange mare widen her eyes and reel back a bit, then swallow uneasily. "Uh oh. Uh, maybe we should just leave an' come back later?" she suggested, glancing back at us.

"Uh, I don't like the sound of that," Spike admitted, earning a nod in agreement from me.

Regardless, the door creaked open two seconds later, snapping everypony's attention back onto it in an instant. Oddly, as it slid open all the way, I noticed that there wasn't anypony actually there. Blinking, I peeked into the room from where I was at on the doorstep, not quite brave enough to actually go inside.

The smell smashed into me in an instant, almost bowling me over with its potency as I suddenly coughed, gagging as it flooded my lungs. My blood riled up an instant later, pounding through me as my body reacted by itself. Holy hell! It was even worse than Sweetie Belle after the Heart's Desire! The pure amount of pheromones saturating the air actually made me sick to my stomach as my head swam, shooting way past ‘pleasant warmth’ and right into ‘oozing nausea’ territory.

"Whoa! Ugh!" Rainbow gasped, reeling back at the same time as me, Spike starting to cough in-between us and plugging his nose. How the hell was I actually supposed to enter the building, even?!

"Meeeeeender, you're back! Awwww, and Fluttershy! You came to seeeeeeee me again!" I suddenly heard Twilight sing out in a rather playful, if not slightly creepy voice. Eh?!

My eyes widened as I watched Twilight slowly lower herself, upside-down, from the upper frame of the door. A large grin expanded across her muzzle, and her pupils had shrunk down to almost pinpoints as she regarded us both in particular. She didn't even seem to acknowledge any of the others. Further, stray tufts of hair stuck out of her coat in various places, and it didn't look like she'd combed her mane or tail all week. Uh, this was bad, right? "Uh oh," Fluttershy whispered, confirming my unspoken question a moment later.

"Uh, calm down, Twi! Yer probably not feelin' too good, an' need ta take it easy," Applejack coaxed, plugging her nose as she stepped up onto the doorstep.

"Mmm. I'm feeling amazing, especially now that my two favorite, sexiest ponies are back. I have such fuuuun things planned out! I made so many lovely potions for you, Mender! I’ll make this aaaall better!" she declared, snickering in a sort of crazed delight as her horn lit up, tentacles of purple and crimson energy snaking down from around her. Aww, hell.

I tried to turn and hop away, but the tentacles snatched my back leg and I smashed my chin into the step instead, wincing as my vision got blasted into a haze. If Twilight noticed, she didn't seem to care and wrapped more tentacles around me, hauling me off the cement and up into the air as I flailed, leaving behind little strings of blood now. Damn it! I had to work on my armor reaction time…

"T-Twilight, stop! Please, you don't want to, um, do this!" Fluttershy pleaded, slipping to my right and raising a hoof up to try to get her herd mate's attention. I got rotated around three or four times in midair before she decided to stick with 'upside-down' like herself, making me dizzy as the blood dripped from my nose and mouth. Being inside the building now, I couldn't think straight anyway as the smells soaked into me from all sides. Nose filter. I had to make a nose filter!

Twilight purred, ignoring the light blue aura that grabbed me and futilely tried to haul me away from her. Rarity just wasn't strong enough to counter her magic. The purple mare grinned and nuzzled into my neck affectionately before tasting down my chest with licks and kisses, slowly going lower. I winced and tried to clear my mind, thinking of advanced rocketry functions and density lists as best I could.

"Oh, I think I want this. Mmm. I'm never letting you go, Mender. Ah, and I promise I'll get better, Fluttershy, so please don't run away anymore," Twilight asked softly, momentary clarity in her eyes before they hazed over again and she grinned. Uh oh.

"Twilight Sparkle! Stop this, right now!" Fluttershy demanded suddenly, snapping both of us out of the haze. Glancing towards her, I slipped away into solid teal, sucking away everything until I could barely breathe. I couldn't move, despite knowing the 'tentacles' had faded away instantly and dropped us both to the floor. I didn't even feel the impact as my eyes widened, almost feeling like they were swelling out of my skull as nothing but teal sank into my very being. Twin pools pulled me in and demanded I not move, listening intently to every suggestion given. What was...? I couldn't think long enough to yank myself away from them!

Claws latched onto me and yanked me past Fluttershy before smacking me in the forehead. I winced, feeling my eyes pull back in as I gasped for air. What was that?! "Dude, don't look into Fluttershy's eyes right now! It's The Stare!" Spike warned as I glanced back towards the back view of the yellow mare.

Twilight was lying on her back, totally rigid as her pupils expanded several fold, vision locked onto Fluttershy despite being upside-down. I instantly realized exactly what she was experiencing. "F-Fluttershy?" the unicorn managed to gasp out, surprising me that she managed enough willpower to even do that.

"I'm ashamed of you, Twilight! You can't take advantage of anypony like that against their will! This isn't you, and you're not thinking clearly. I didn't want to use this, but you didn't leave me with a choice! Apologize to Mender right now!" Fluttershy flat out ordered, causing my jaw to drop. Wait, what?! Why, but, how was... Was this still Fluttershy?!

A visible snap in Twilight's expression hit as her eyes started to get watery. Fluttershy had closed her eyes, I realized almost instantly. What was that ability, some sort of projected magical technique?! It even stopped Twilight!

The lavender mare sniffed lightly, shaking her head as she just lay down instead. "I'm sorry, Mender. I just... I screwed up! I shouldn't have let you go to the cabins alone. I, um, I'm sorry to you as well, Fluttershy. I promise that I'll-" she started to whisper, looking down and away from us all. I didn't need a link with her to spot regret. A light burst of panic shot through Fluttershy, and she quickly interrupted.

"No! Twilight, it wasn't that. You were, um... It was amazing," the pegasus quickly assured, a predictable blush expanding across her cheeks. Rainbow finally grinned at that admission, but I didn't really feel anything at all. Really, it was kind of immature to let this bother me. Rarity was right. I should be happy for them. My own feelings were just being selfish.

Twilight gave Fluttershy a surprised stare before returning her blush. "Oh," the lavender mare muttered upon recovering. Heh, I knew that 'Oh' type. That lovely moment of dawning horror when you realized everything you had been acting on had been an incorrect assumption. That sensation I was intimately familiar with. "Oh, that means you were..." she added a moment later in a whisper, looking past Fluttershy and right at me instead. Eh?

The yellow pegasus nodded, the gesturing so minute that I almost missed it. "We were wrong to. Mender isn't in, um..." She trailed off for a moment, and then Rarity finished rummaging around in her bag.

Twilight let out a surprised squawk as a large blast of powder blue spray flew across her, whipping upwards into the air with a gesture of Rarity's horn. Eh?! She hummed pleasantly as she coated the entrance with the stuff, and then nodded to the bewildered Twilight.

"The smells are potent, Dear. You simply must get this cleaned up. Yourself, too," she pointed out a moment later, steering the topic away from the subject in an instant. I stared at her, mildly surprised but realizing exactly what she was doing all the same.

"B-But-" Twilight started, looking back towards me an instant later, a flurry of emotions dancing through her eyes so fast I could barely keep up with them all.

Rarity coughed sharply, however, snapping a mask onto herself before shaking her head. Oddly, Spike was also wearing a mask and holding another large can of whatever that stuff was. Wait, the smell! It was gone! "No buts! Fluttershy, get Twilight upstairs and into a bath. Wash her thoroughly. This is no way to present yourself," the pearly unicorn ordered calmly, then looked over to the rest of us.

"Spike has resistances, and can help me clean the loft and bedroom areas. Applejack and Rainbow, you're on the ground floor," the mare instructed.

Applejack smiled lightly, her eyes getting a knowing look in them. I suddenly realized the unicorn hadn't fooled her even for an instant. Rainbow more looked towards me than Rarity, but hesitantly nodded a second later. That was a good question, though.

"Where do you want me? Basement?" I inquired, deciding that was really the only floor nopony was cleaning yet.

Rarity surprised me mildly by dramatically gasping, however. "Good heavens, no! She spent most of her time down there, and it's likely to be the worst! All of us shall storm its gates when we finish the rest of the library," she announced in her usual dramatic fashion, smirking afterwards. Heh. That made sense, but didn't answer my question. She dug back into her bag upon setting the can down, and also pulled out a few tissues.

She shook her head a second later, probably guessing at my next question. "No, instead, I'd like you to go back to Fluttershy's cottage and wait for us to come and get you. I know for a fact that she keeps the place in pristine condition, even during this time of year," she added, using the tissues to gently clean my muzzle as well, the red striking a sharp contrast to her soft blue glows around them.

"Oh Dear," Fluttershy whispered softly, eyes widening at Rarity's suggestion.

"What?! Why are you sending just him away?!" Twilight asked, frowning instantly. That… that was a good question, but I think I understood. Sadly, Rarity pushed my jaw back up during her cleaning and stopped me from saying anything.

The pearly frowned and glanced back towards her a moment later. Yeah, it was obvious, wasn’t it? To get me away from those two due to the, well, discomfort I was causing them. I was curious as to what her excuse was going to be, anyway.

"You very well know that he is not only a pony, instead of a dragon, but also a stallion. He's the absolute most susceptible individual here to your smells, and you'd make him stay, no matter how sick he got?" Rarity inquired, a bit of a biting tone underlying in the question. Somehow, she also managed to keep up concentration enough to pull out another tissue and clean my nostrils as well, despite not looking in my direction. I was impressed. Regardless, yikes! She knew how to redirect things in her favor. Plus, if it weren’t for my nose filter and cyborg blood modifications, she'd be absolutely right. Of course, until I 'upgraded' the nose filter to include pheromones, I wasn't exactly 'immune' to them, instead functioning about on part with Spike.

Twilight winced, looking down and away from us as she swallowed, definitely feeling that remark. Rarity sighed and softened her eyes, shaking her head towards the mare. "Relax, Twilight. You may talk to him again after cleaning yourself up, obviously. But not here. This is not a safe atmosphere for Mender," she added, resting her hoof lightly on Twilight's shoulder. Despite the manipulation, I realized she really was trying to help. Maybe I'd feel better with a bit of distance and time to think, too? Besides, I couldn't fault her for it. It was hard to argue with the results the mare could get.

"Ah'm gonna drop by later, too, Mender. Big Mac wrote me an' said ya agreed ta tha projects. Plus, yer worryin' me ah bit," Applejack admitted gently, turning to me while Rarity was still assuring Twilight.

I frowned, and then looked away from the bluntly honest mare, sighing. "If you want, of course. I'll be fine, Applejack," I tried to assure, nodding to her. She didn't look convinced, of course, but returned my nod.

"Um, there's food in the kitchen, of course, if you get hungry! And you can wash up in my bathroom. Or sleep on my bed if you're tired. Uh, if you want to, anyway. Just, um, please try to make yourself at home," Fluttershy suddenly requested, turning around and fidgeting back and forth on her forelegs, an entirely different mare from the one who'd just ordered Twilight to apologize, I realized.

I stared at her for a moment, noticing how downright flustered and panicked she looked. It was disheartening as much as it was adorable, and I smiled lightly to her, nodding. "You're okay, Fluttershy. Just make sure Twilight's okay for me, all right?" I requested. This wasn't how I thought things would go when I got here, but we didn't have a choice. She gave me a timid nod, relaxing a little, but her eyes still shimmered, a bit of wetness pooling in them.

Swallowing, I turned away and started walking back into the town square. No, I couldn't look. I wouldn't want to leave if I saw any more of her. Damn it. Even if I was angry with them and let that side win, I still cared for both of them. Even if they treated me like dirt. I guess that said something about me, too. Either I was amazingly true to my feelings, or the biggest pansy Equestria had ever seen. Heh.

"Ah! Where do you think you three are going?!" Rarity suddenly spoke up, giving me a start and knocking me out of my thoughts. Huh?! What was going on?

Three sets of hoofsteps froze behind me in the same instant. "Uh, with Mender?" I heard Sweetie squeak out a moment later, sounding unsure. Oh. I stopped walking long enough to at least find out if I'd be alone or not.

"No, you aren't, Sweetie. You've caused enough trouble for him and he deserves a break from that. You three can clean the kitchen up," Rarity corrected sternly, no room for debate from her tone, by the sounds of it. She wasn't that much trouble. At this point I was rather fond of the little filly. Although that was probably her hope all along.

"Hey! What did we do?! We weren't the ones that tried to poison Mender," Scootaloo reminded, sounding miffed that she was being forced into cleaning as well. I resisted snickering.

Apple Bloom sounded less amused, coughing lightly. "No way, Scootaloo! If Sweetie has ta clean, we're gonna help her. We're her friends," the little filly corrected. I heard a soft, pleased coo that sounded remarkably like Applejack an instant later, and smiled. Indeed. Good girl.

"Ugh. Fine," Scootaloo relented, with no other struggle. I knew she knew that it was the right thing to do regardless. Hearing the three start back towards the library, surprisingly little argument from Sweetie, I pushed it all out of my head and walked into the town square, intentionally shifting my way into the crowd and out of sight.

A dozen steps later, I stopped and exhaled, slumping on my legs and letting out a shiver. My body was fine, but my insides felt exhausted from the internal struggle. I realized I was angry, but felt like an idiot for it. Was I immature, or justified? Did it matter, even? Not really. All that mattered is what I did, not how I felt. I was selfish. I wanted to be happy. I wanted to be with them both. But I retained what I felt were my own morals. They told me that I shouldn't be selfish, and just be happy with what I already have. I didn't want to hurt either of them in the pursuit of my own wants and needs.

Staring at the dirt, I momentarily noticed my forward proximity sensor flag a warning and sighed, looking up in time to get a newspaper pushed into my face. Huh? Raising an eyebrow, I glanced around it to find that mare from earlier holding it out with her magic, her horn softly glowing the same color as her eyes, a pale green. She frowned lightly and was looking away from me, not saying a word. Um, what exactly did she want?

"Uh, do you need something, Miss?" I asked, somewhat confused as I pushed the newspaper backwards with a hoof. I'd already seen the front page, so if she wanted to show me something, she'd have to be more specific than that.

"Jus' take it! Look, it's, well, on tha house, okay? Besides, yoo got it all dirty when ya tripped over it," she muttered, frowning a bit more and making a solid point in looking further away from me. I raised an eyebrow at the paper, noticing it was actually one of the clean ones that were in her sample area, sporting the same numbered corner in marker. She was... She was being nice to me, I realized. But she didn't want to admit that.

I smiled lightly and walked past her, shifting my direction towards her shop instead. She scoffed for a moment until she realized I'd altered my course, and then ran after me. "W-Wait! Yoo ain't thinkin' o' goin' back ta my stand, ah’ ya?!" she demanded, catching up fairly easily with my right side.

"It's fine. I'll be quiet. I just want to read the main story, if you don't mind, and figured I'd stay near your stand so you could make sure I wasn't stealing anything," I elaborated, wanting to see if the article was indeed unbiased. From the title, it sounded like it actually was and ponies were overreacting.

Glancing back when she stopped, I noticed her giving me a confused stare, and smiled to her. She predictably scowled almost instantly and looked away, causing me to smile a little wider. Turning again, I headed back towards her shop, lying down next to one of the stacks of papers and sliding one off the shortest stack.

"This one's free, ya dummy. Why didn't yoo want this one? I should charge ya fer that one instead," the strange unicorn muttered, walking up again and standing behind her multitude of piles, glaring at me. Well, I assumed she was glaring as my proximity sensor showed her looking at me, and that appeared to be her standard expression. Given that, I immediately pictured her grinning happily at me instead and tried not to burst into snickering.

"That one's one of your samples. Don't you need to keep those? That's what the little number in the corner means, I'm guessing," I pointed out, not looking up from the front page. Generic reporting on what happened during the party in Canterlot, I noted so far. They didn't have the emphasis on Rarity rescuing anypony, or that Twilight was secretly molesting me to keep herself eternally young or anything. That was a good start.

"Huh. Guess yoo ain't as dumb as I thought. Hum. Don't mistake that fer a compliment, though! Yer still a dummy," she insisted a moment later.

I smiled to myself, nodding without looking up from the article. "Yup. Of course. I'm a complete and total idiot," I agreed. That was at least something I could honestly agree with. Now, if only I could figure out what part I thought was the stupid move. Where exactly had I gone wrong to start this terrible chain of events?

To my surprise, they shifted right to reporting on me instead, however. They didn't mention any medical record, but did reveal that I had essentially just appeared in Equestria one day. They also honestly stated that some ponies accused me, and were under the suspicion that I was a Changeling. Then they just went on to report about the fiasco around that and the use of magical fliers to attempt to slander me and spread specific emotions. My eyes widened. They actually said that.

The unicorn narrowed her eyes as she watched me. "I'm tellin' ya! They ain't biased!" she snapped preemptively. Well, yeah. Truth.

"Yeah, they aren't biased," I agreed, nodding to myself as I closed the second page again, where I had been redirected to from the front.

"No! I'm tellin' ya, they ain't... What?" she asked suddenly, shifting from irked looking to a blank expression instead.

I simply nodded, setting the paper back down again on her pile. "You're right. The article isn't biased, now that I read it fully," I repeated.

She stared at me with a deadpan expression still as I adjusted the pile to be neat and orderly before glancing around her little platform. She didn't have anyplace really for herself, the thing consisting of the bundles of newspapers lying on top of a folded apart box that I presumed she had used to carry them all. A tiny metal lockbox rested in the corner of it, open and containing six tiny, golden coins. Huh. At two bits apiece, that indicated she'd sold three papers. Yikes. My eyes spotted her marker, however.

"Oh," she finally muttered, making me realize she was just as linguistically profound as myself. She followed up with "Uh?" as I snatched her marker with my mouth and clicked the cap off it with a flick of my tongue. This was all I could do, really.

A few seconds later, I'd written my message across the front of the first sample paper. "Not Biased. -Mender" It was simple, of course, but hopefully ponies would believe it was actually me writing it.

She stared blankly at the message, looking surprised. Ignoring her, I steeled my nerves and swallowed weakly, dropping the marker on top of the newly written message. My friends and I had caused her a few inconveniences, so it was only fair I do something for her. Still, I couldn’t believe I was going to do this… Turning, I shouted out at the top of my lungs, "This newspaper is actually really good, accurate reporting!" The mare's eyes bugged out as dozens upon dozens of ponies turned and looked at me all at the same time. I fought down the spike of panic that shot through me, and resisted the urge to run away suddenly. Swallowing the tight knot in my throat, I gestured down to the stacks of papers as at least two-dozen ponies approached. Oh hell. Why had I done that?!

"Really, Mender? I saw them, but I guess I just assumed it was more garbage and slander," a stallion spoke up from the front of the crowd. My ears perked and rotated that way as I recognized the voice.

Noteworthy gave me a friendly grin as he walked up, and I relaxed a little. "Yeah. Fancypants said he had locked down on the slander, plus this is actually from Manehatten, so I gave it a chance. The story is accurate and unbiased, giving quite a few details on the ongoing investigation," I reported to him, standing a little more upright. If I pretended I was talking only to him, it was easier.

The entire crowd started talking all at once. Damn it! "Are they safe? There isn't any magic on them, right?" Rose asked to my right, edging out of the crowd and nudging the closest stack with her hoof at full extension. Heh.

Instead of answering, I turned and walked up to the largest stack, my left foreleg and hoof rune flaring up with sky blue light. I could cast from anywhere on my body, but not only was it habit to use my left hoof, but the focus rune engraving pulled the magic even closer to the surface. I wanted to be as accurate as possible, after all!

My hoof slid slowly down the stack as I did my best to ignore the dozens upon dozens of eyes on me. The magic danced out along the paper as thoroughly and intrusive as I could muster without literally setting them all on fire.

Twenty seconds later, I reached the bottom of the pile, all of them glowing a faint blue now from my residual energy. Not a single thing. Before I literally saturated them, they had been totally devoid of energy. There was no way an enchantment could function and use no energy. It was against so many fundamental rules of physics that it made my head hurt to even consider it, and I was pretty sure Pinkie was on our side. That meant it was safe to assume that the organization operated within the bounds of physics.

"They're totally clean. Just normal paper and ink. There's no paper that can do that naturally, right?" I asked, turning to look at Noteworthy.

He grinned and shook his head. "Guess they're safe, then! Mind checking the other piles, too?" he requested politely, stepping aside as ponies started to move in, bits being produced.

"Of course. Not going to risk anypony by not being thorough," I assured, having already planned on doing that anyway. I so didn't want a repeat of what happened last time! The minty green mare looked totally bewildered at this point as ponies came in from all sides of her, offering bits in exchange for the papers. I smiled at the scene for a second before slipping up and approaching the next pile. In all honesty, I was just happy I wasn't the focus of attention anymore.

It took me a good five minutes, but every paper around the makeshift stand was glowing blue. I smiled at my work, having discovered all nine stacks to be totally spotless, as anticipated. It didn't look like Manehatten had anything to do with what happened that day. Three stacks were gone ten minutes later, with a bigger and bigger crowd moving in to see what the initial ponies were doing, and word started to spread without me needing to say a thing. The glowing papers rapidly became quite a hit, it seemed. I guessed my magic was still really weird for ponies.

Unfortunately, I discovered a problem after I finished scanning the last one. The crowd was too thick for me to safely navigate out without some serious shoving. I decided to let my lazy side win instead, and simply lay down, reading one of the many papers from the closest pile, trying to learn more about my new home. The opportunity was there, after all.

The two big races were coming up, of course, for the cities. The Running of the Leaves was more a holiday than an event, it would seem, with multiple towns each hosting their own race. While it did end up hauling quite a lot of leaves down, it would seem it was more ceremonial than anything. The Cloudy Sky Dash was, in comparison, more of a commercial event, then. The second they mentioned pegasi getting 'sponsored' to fly in it, I knew it took itself a little more seriously. Fancypants was hosting it as well, which interested me.

Beyond that, it discussed the incoming patterns of weather that were 'ordered', various markets that were booming in the cities, new fashion trends from Manehatten and Canterlot, and popular celebrities and their lives. I was deeply amused at the image of Vinyl standing on top of a massive speaker system and holding her hoof up victoriously, tables and chairs being uprooted and flung away at the bottom of the picture from what I assumed to be pure vibration. Yikes! Reading the caption, it was from a fundraiser that I'd missed due to Estrus. Bigger cities really didn't shut down, it would seem.

Flipping the page, I started to read about Cadance and Shining Armor, ruling in the newly revitalized Crystal Empire. The trade routes were re-established and new products flooded the markets under their rule, and nothing but praise was given, making me realize exactly how amazing their approval rating was. Idly, I wondered if Shining had finished moving all their stuff up there yet. Heh.

The crowd started to thin out while I read about the crystal ponies. Peeking up again, I noticed several ponies lingering and chatting about the harsher winter coming up, and the newspaper seller looking very pleased towards me. Oh? She noticed me finally paying attention and hopped down from the platform, trotting over to me.

"Okay, I was wrong about yoo. Although now I just gotta ask. What exactly do ya want?" she inquired, eyeing me with playful suspicion. Eh? Want? What did I want? That was a hard one.

I thought for a moment, scratching my chin with my hoof before shrugging. "A nice job and income would be amazing. Hmm. Beyond that, just a normal life, but I doubt I'll be getting that for a while," I muttered idly. Kind of depressing, but I'd accepted that at this point. Once a soldier, always a soldier. It was more a lifestyle than a profession anyway.

The answer apparently wasn't what she was looking for, if her blank stare meant anything. "Uh, I meant fer helpin' me so much? Um, yoo kinda saved my flank. If I had gone back with those sales, I probably would'a been canned real hard, like," she admitted, averting her eyes away from me and coughing lightly. Oh! Here I thought she was just being sociable. Well, no, I really didn't, but it was fun to pretend. I guess I really did like to avoid anything to do with being 'rewarded'. Maybe it was a psychological thing? That was a whole can of worms with me, though. I gave up around the 'conversing with corpses' part.

"Oh, that. It was sort of my responsibility regardless to make sure the papers were safe. Putting out the good word afterwards was just the obvious thing to do. No need for ponies to be unnecessarily cautious if there's no need for it," I reasoned idly, trying to push it away from any potential reward again. It had been a nice distraction regardless.

She exhaled quietly, but smiled. "I didn't recognize yoo before, but thank you, Mr. Moon Mender. I'm glad ta see that yoo really ah’ a good pony. Although I'd almost think ya were tryin' ta take advantage o' my post-heat hormones, ya know?" She added a wink on afterwards, and I rolled my eyes. At least she openly advertised that she was joking.

"Right. No, I'm quite happy with..." I trailed off, losing my smile a second later. I'd almost said herd. We'd been using that term unofficially for a while, but I didn't realize before that there were 'formal' formations to them. I didn't have a herd. That was...

She shifted to a frown and head tilt, but I rapidly shook my head. "I'm happy with my two fillyfriends. Really, I was just trying to be helpful," I finally continued. Happy. I wasn't happy, but close enough. I wasn't being tortured or shot at or blown up, so I had to be happy, right? I'd be a selfish idiot to not be, given the sheer difference in situation. Talk about taking things for granted!

"I, um, know pain when I see it. Try ta take it easy, Mender. Yoo deserve ta be happy just as much, if not more than anypony else. If yoo need anythin', and find yerself in Manehatten, know yoo got ah friend," she assured, giving a soft smile before turning again and heading back to her platform.

Looking down at the paper for a moment, I exhaled and nodded to nopony in particular. I didn't feel nearly as entitled as she claimed me to be. I rolled the paper up with magic and slipped it into my left saddlebag. Accessing the lower pouch, I used a tiny barrier to scoop out two bits and slide them across the platform to her.

She perked and rotated at the sound, then scowled towards me, but I turned and headed towards Fluttershy's cabin before she could say anything. Helping somepony was a nice distraction, but I couldn't escape my own thoughts for very long, it would seem. That fact I at least welcomed. If anything, I think it made me even less a robot...

I stopped walking a second later, blinking. Crap! I’d forgotten to get her name…

Fluttershy's cottage hadn't changed in the slightest since I'd last seen it. For her also being my fillyfriend, I suddenly realized I hadn't spent very much time here at all. Twilight really had sort of monopolized my time, at the very least. Well, no time like the present to even things out, I guessed. Assuming they were both still interested. I couldn't afford to not assume that at this point, and shook the stray thought from my head as I walked up the dirt path towards the cottage.

Despite knowing it was empty, it felt full of life still. Birds sang around it, occupying many of the nearby trees, and the more timid natural wildlife seemed to thrive in this area. Further, the flora seemed to flourish, too, the trees looking healthier, the grass greener, and a plethora of flowers dotting the landscape in both natural and Fluttershy-designed clusters. It felt homey, and I warmed up a little inside despite my fur puffing out at the nippy air.

To my surprise, absolutely nothing happened when I approached and entered her yard. The birds kept singing, squirrels still stocked up on nuts in the trees, and several rabbits hopped past, acting like I was just another shrub or rock, albeit a strangely colored and moving one. They must feel really safe here. Either that, or they were really conditioned towards ponies, who were largely peaceful and friendly in this town. Or Fluttershy told them about me and I had made it onto some sort of animal 'white list' or something. Huh.

Deciding I was probably over-thinking things, I continued on, stopping twice for a flurry of squirrel movement, and another time as a kitten trotted past, momentarily rubbing my foreleg before moving on. Okay, yeah. I had a soft spot for cute things. Feeling a bit better, I finally reached the door to the cottage and slipped a forehoof up onto the handle. A burst of magic rotated it around, and the door gently slid open with a light creaking noise. Hmm. It needed oil. Watching it open, I also noticed its balance was a little off, and tossed up a mental note to fix that.

Closing the door again, I froze as my ears rotated around towards her stairs. Singing drifted down them from above, alongside the sound of the shower running. Really bad singing, which was several keys out of tune. Edging closer to the stairs, I noticed that it was a masculine voice as well. Fluttershy had a stallion in her house? And he was using her shower?!

I pushed conclusions out of my head as they pounced at me, and shuddered. No, maybe she had a brother or something? Besides, she liked Twilight as well, and definitely didn't seem the type for a one-night thing. Of course, I had also assumed that I was to be included in any herd developments as well, before today. No! Bad Mender. It was probably nothing to worry about!

Rolling my eyes at my own thoughts, I straightened myself a bit and walked up the stairs. She probably had male family, too. She never talked about them before, so I couldn't assume she didn't. A burglar was also wildly unlikely to be using her shower, not to mention be in Ponyville in the first place. Actually, I just realized that Fluttershy's door had been totally unlocked. Huh. Eh, even if it was a burglar, I was probably the worst thing that could ever happen to him at this point. A royal guard was bad enough, but an eldritch abomination royal guard was even worse!

Stretching out, I walked past the bathroom door and lay down on the couch facing it. No need to jump to conclusions. If it was family, I wanted to make a good impression, not be remembered as the coltfriend who attacked and bucked her brother Butterscotch through a wall, or something. That sounded like a pony name, right?

The shower turned off a few minutes later, and my eyes flicked open again, focusing on the door. The singing sadly continued, followed by a scrubbing sound of what I assumed was a towel drying whomever it was off. Thirty seconds later, the door finally opened, and I lifted my head fully.

What the hell was that?! Some sort of chimeric monster exited Fluttershy's bathroom. Its head looked sort of like a deformed pony, but it had a mismatched pair of horns sprouting from it, one being a deer antler and the other a goat horn. Actually, all of its body was like that. The arms appeared to be from some sort of large cat and equally big bird of prey. Its tail and right leg seemed to be lizard in nature, with the left leg cloven instead. To top off the weirdness, both a pegasus and bat wing grew from its back. My eyes widened as fast as its did, and it released a surprisingly high pitched scream, rapidly wrapping the towel around itself.

Totally caught off guard, I mimicked its scream a heartbeat later, albeit lower in pitch. The cat paw made a snapping motion, and everything went black as something suddenly appeared over my head. My scanners discovered it was a paper bag a heartbeat later as I flipped backwards through the air, residual memory calculating where furniture was for my landing.

Barrier blades flicked out of my skin, paper shreds drifted about as I hit and skidded across the floor, glaring at the creature. No attack had been launched after it tried to impede my vision. Despite evasive maneuvers not being needed, it still got distance between us, anyway. It had stopped screaming, and was looking at me with an oddly delighted expression now. Great. Of course, if it was some sort of genetic experiment or something, mental instability wasn't out of the question.

"Ooooh! Finally, something interesting happens! Such a strange pony shows up out of nowhere, and nopony even tells me," he announced with a light pout, shifting back to a masculine voice and snapping again. The towel disappeared a moment later, him deciding he was apparently no longer modest. Yup, unstable... Further, he appeared to possess extremely fast spellcasting capacity. I couldn't afford to be discreet, my eyes shifting color and starting to glow as my scanners kicked in and started analyzing the energy fields around him.

"Who are you and what are you doing in Fluttershy's cottage?!" I asked sharply, ignoring the gasp as he watched my eyes.

The strange creature only grinned, however, standing up tall and proud. "Why, I could ask you the same thing! But opportunity presents itself, and it's been at least five hundred and sixty years since I've been 'scanned' by anything! Oh, and I was a statue then and couldn't even pose properly!" he lamented, holding the back of his cat paw to his forehead as he leaned backwards. Wait, what? He was aware I was scanning him?

I didn't have time to contemplate that, sadly, as his short, bristly mane shifted into a long and oddly flowing one, despite there being no wind inside of the cottage obviously. Further, a two-piece swimsuit came out of nowhere onto him, and he started posing in rather seductive looking postures. Uh...

Confusion was an understatement, but he spoke up a moment later with, "I'm the fabulous Discord, of course! I'm surprised you haven't heard of me, as I'm very good friends with Fluttershy and the other Elements of Harmony. Why, they changed my entire outlook!" he dramatically announced, flipping up to his feet again and gesturing upwards to the ceiling while in a kneeling posture. Okay, so he was kind of a weird combination of Rarity and Pinkie Pie, with a good lump of crazy mixed in. Wonderful! Wait, had I heard that name before?

My mind flicked back to Twilight's 'appended' history lesson, considering the history books hadn't gotten updated to the newest events. She'd mentioned them reforming a 'Discord', who was basically a spirit of pure chaos. So this is what a 'draconequus' looked like. More Latin, I noted. Dragon horse? I guess it made sense. And hey, I was actually going into a situation knowing what it was about for once!

"Oh, spirit of chaos, right?" I asked, relaxing and standing upright again. Twilight had put an emphasis on 'reformed', so I assumed that meant he was friendly and I didn't have to slice him into tiny ribbons, and toss the remains into subspace before detaching it and watching them float away into nothingness. Trespassing in Fluttershy's cottage was serious business, after all.

He gave another gasp, and then smirked at me. "Why, you do know of me! Although this does appear to leave me at a disadvantage. You're still simply the strange pony invading my dear friend's house, after all," he reminded, gesturing towards me with the bird claw before standing more upright, back to a normal posture. I used the term 'normal' rather loosely with this one, though.

"I'm not invading. Fluttershy knows I'm here, and Rarity was the one who sent me. I'm Moon Mender. Nice to meet you," I attempted to greet politely, raising my hoof up.

Discord eyed it suspiciously for a moment before waddling over and giving it a shake. "So polite for somepony first meeting me! I'm used to colder welcomes, I guess," he admitted, giving a shiver and snapping a snowsuit onto himself. I raised an eyebrow before four hundred pounds of snow landed on top of me, flattening the entire upstairs with a heavy crash. Ow...

Thankfully, this time I'd noticed a distortion effect to the energy grid just before the snow appeared! That gave my subdermal armor time to pop into place, and I stood up again through the snow, feeling significantly heavier with the added inner plating. "Uh, you just destroyed Fluttershy's bedroom!" I yelped, looking around at the damage before glaring back over at the snowman. Snowman?

The distortion flicked in right on my left and I skidded out of the way, turning to face him as he re-appeared. "Oooh, good reflexes! But I'm hurt! I'd never damage any of Fluttershy's things, you know," he assured, snapping his fingers again. The snow was gone in an instant, and everything was exactly how it was before. Wait, what? There was no Alteration or Transmutation there, and he clearly snapped the couch into three pieces! How did he repair it without using any shifting magic?! It was almost like he was overwriting spacetime on a local level...

He paused a second later, eyes suddenly starting to dance with a bit of energy, and an impish smile forming. Uh oh. "Ooooh, wait, you're 'the' Moon Mender? I have heard about you after all!" he cooed. Ugh. It had been a while since I heard somepony say my name like that. Canterlot, was it? Sadly, he continued talking regardless. "So you're Fluttershy's very, very special friend I hear so much about. Twilight, too?! Why, it's almost scandalous! I must ask..."

I raised an eyebrow as he peeked left and right, as if checking to make sure we were still alone before hopping forwards a bit, comically large privacy screens appearing to each side of us. "How is she?" he asked in a quiet whisper, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. Er, what?

Blinking, I felt a bit confused, but shook my head. "Uh, last I checked, fine. Well, a little sad, but she was hanging out with Twilight, so hopefully that will cheer her up," I reported. For somepony in her house, he didn't keep very good tabs on her condition, I decided.

He gave me a raised eyebrow, instead. "Not exactly what I had in mind, but that will do nicely, and tells me a surprising amount, actually. Wait, sad?" he questioned, eyes narrowing a bit towards the end.

My ears flattened back and I sighed, looking down towards my hooves again. "Yeah, I think she feels guilty about making a herd with Twilight without me," I elaborated quietly, really not wanting to remember all that so soon.

"Ooooh, Fluttershy and Twilight?! Really?! Oooh, ho ho! I've so got to visit the little bookworm about this. In fact, I think I will!" he declared suddenly. What?!

"Wait, they're-" I started to call out. I was cut off, however, as he disappeared in a flash of light, this time not reappearing... "-taking a bath..." I finished to nopony in particular, slapping my forehead with my right forehoof. Okay, that wasn't my fault. There was nothing I could do if the spirit of chaos was impulsive. Of course, I probably should have anticipated that, but eh. I'm sure it would be fine. Besides, if Twilight freaked out and nuked him with her magic, I wouldn't have to worry about it in the first place!

As if on cue, Fluttershy's heart rate went through the roof, and I sighed. He really did it. Out of curiosity, I flipped on Fluttershy's audio feed. At first I thought it was broken until I identified the high-pitched squeak as her.

"Discord?! What are you-" I heard Twilight start to shout.

A dramatic gasp cut her off. "Why, it is true! You two are-" the crazy chimera started to loudly declare. He in turn was cut off by what sounded like several blasts of magic and a feminine scream. No, wait, that was his. Wincing, I turned the audio off again, deciding I'd rather not listen to his fate.

Snickering again, I wandered into the bathroom myself a moment later. Actually, given that I hadn't been able to properly wash myself with soap and shampoo for a week, a shower didn't sound all that bad. Smiling, I started the water up as I shifted my bottle of shampoo out of subspace and onto the rim of Fluttershy's bathtub. Twilight had insisted I get my own soaps and whatnot two days after I had gotten out of the hospital for the second time. Or was it the third? Okay, yeah, third if you counted my first visit. Regardless, she declared that I needed a more 'masculine' scent to compliment my own natural smells. It was an awkward conversation, mostly due to her admitting to liking the way I smelled.

Relaxing slightly, I slid the curtain over on the bathtub and flicked the shower on. The warm water running over my back felt amazing, and I just stood there letting it soak in. For the first time in over an hour, I just let the tension out of my muscles. They felt thick and tired, as if I'd been walking for days on them. The energy went out of me and I lowered myself to the floor of the tub, watching the water drip down around me. I was so tired, and I suddenly realized it wasn't entirely because my body was healing. No, it had done a fairly good job of that already. It just took so much effort suddenly to 'want' to move. Falling asleep for the better part of a week suddenly sounded really, really appetizing. I felt exhausted, and it seemed to hit me out of nowhere. I wished somepony else could go see Celestia in a few days, and deal with all this dimensional crap. Then I could just snooze in Fluttershy's shower and pretend to be a shower mat. I wouldn't even care if she stepped on me.

Lying down felt too good, so I just scrubbed down my mane and tail with the shampoo from there, lazily blocking the water with a barrier when needed. The warm water hazed around me as I sighed wearily, rolling onto my side as I washed down my coat, using actual soap this time and feeling all the cleaner for it. Sadly, the fresher I felt, the more tired I got.

By the time I was done scrubbing, it felt like I'd stayed up for three days straight. Was fatigue catching up with me, or was there a different reason for this? Admittedly, my mind was the most tired part of me, especially after the three-way mortal combat of emotions for the better part of an hour. My life was simpler when I just blew things up.

It took a bit of effort, but I made a thin barrier up along the rim of the tub. It was so thin that it didn't actually stop anything as I slowly slipped up and through it. The filter kicked in properly, however, as it slowly slid along my fur, keeping all of the water on the other side and leaving me nice and dry. I smiled, then blinked and sighed as my fur shivered, then puffed up dramatically from the process. Damn it. I'd hoped it would avoid that effect. Oh well. At least it was faster.

Stashing my cleaning supplies inside of me again, I trotted out into the bedroom and over to where I dropped all my stuff by the couch. It was kind of weird seeing two Aegis Artifacts just sort of lying there like discarded travel bags as I moved past them and hopped up on the couch. To hell with it. I hadn't caught up on my sleep yet anyway, and last night wasn't the greatest, so it was naptime. I crashed over sideways and snuggled into the cushions, enjoying how cozy it was.

Minutes passed. Despite how tired I was, my mind just wouldn't turn itself off, bits of the last couple hours stuck on endless loop in my head. It was a pain not being able to decide how I even wanted to feel about everything, and the only thing I could uniformly agree to was that I didn't want to deal with it right now. Unfortunately, as feelings often go, my heart wasn't one to just give up on the issue. Finally, I just groaned and settled it for myself, pushing my face into the end of the couch.

I didn't want to deal with it, so obviously the 'easiest' solution was the most practical. Just let them do whatever the hell they wanted and stop freaking out over it. I'd already established how absolutely terrible I was with anything involving social situations. Rarity, who was amazing at them, acted as if it were literally nothing, so maybe I should just follow her lead? I should have just done that from the start. I was the outsider to their relationships, so I should be the one to have to swallow my pride and adapt. Even if only subconsciously, they'd definitely told me of my place in things!

Despite the decision actually making me feel worse, at least a decision had been made, and I whacked my face off the side cushion a couple of times before collapsing back onto my side, finally exhausted. To hell with it. I didn't care anymore. I just wanted to sleep. This time it didn't take long, and I let myself fall away backwards, a soft smirk forming in my mind. Just go away, world...