The cheery little baby pegasi on the wall greet Shining Armor as he walks into the clinic. The waiting room is empty this time, its only occupant standing behind the counter; the same unicorn nurse from last time.

Okay. You're still the Captain, remember? Be assertive. Don't let people push you around!

"Hello? I'm here to—" is all he can say before the nurse points a hoof at one of the pink doors, not even lifting her gaze.

"Miss Swallow will see you now, Mister Armor."

"Thank..." The nurse has returned to her work, apparently having forgotten the Prince already. "...you," he finishes on rote and feels his ego deflate like a balloon. With wary steps he walks to his assigned door, feeling more like a criminal about to face judgment.

"Come in," tells a voice from inside — clearly the voice of an older mare. As Shining Armor enters, he has to stop and blink for a moment. The room doesn't remind him so much of a clinic, but of a comfortable living room: Soft carpets, comfortable looking chairs, a sofa and a coffee table all done in dark browns. The room even smells like a living room, with a distant scent of dust, down and scented candles. On one of the walls stands a bookcase with only a few books, the rest of the shelves filled with kitchy paraphernalia, most of them from foreign countries. His eyes linger on one item in particular, a miniature stone pyramid with "Get stoned in Neighgypt" carved on it in gaudy letters. The horridness of the pun makes him wince. The other wall has several paintings, and a large family photo. In the photo sits Doctor Pickle, and a pair of older ponies, apparently taken on Pickle's graduation day.

The voice he heard earlier belongs to a unicorn mare with a light fuchsia coat and a greying yellow mane in a bun — the same mare from the family photo. She is currently winding an antique clock on the wall with her hooves.

"Do you need help with that?" Shining Armor asks.

"No thank you, but you're a darling for asking." Her voice sounds friendly, but there is an undertone of sternness to it.

It's a voice hard to disobey. Just what I needed today, another bossy mare. Why couldn't the horrible maids be the only ones? Shining Armor finds himself thinking, before mentally kicking himself on the shin.

"There we go." She closes the cover of the clock and starts the pendulum. A calming ticking voice fills the room, soon becoming just background ambiance. She turns around and offers a hoof in greeting. "I'm Sassy. Sassy Swallow. Pleased to meet you." Shining Armor was expecting the mare to be ancient, but her face is almost completely free of wrinkles, and her hoofshake is full of energy.

"Shining Armor," he says. His gaze travels around the room. "Should I lie on the couch and tell you about my mother or something?"

The mare plops down on one of the chairs and spreads her forehooves wide. "Sit wherever you like. And don't start me on that psychoanalysis stuff. Old Trotmund caused more harm than good for the image of us psychotherapists as is."

He walks to one of the comfortable-looking recliners and sits down, letting out a yelp as the chair tilts back and a hoofrest shoots from under his hind legs.

"Oh, sorry about that. I've been meaning to get that fixed. Are you comfortable there?"

"Nnngh." He crawls into a better position on the chair so he can see the mare.

"Good. Now, is this your first time in therapy?" she asks.

"Y-yeah. And I don't understand any of this psychoanalysis... stuff you're talking about." The fact that he is looking at her from directly between his legs feels very awkward to him, like he was conversing with his crotch.

"You don't need to. Just forget the preconceptions of a Germane stallion showing you pictures of naughty inkblots. I'm a cognitive-analytic psychotherapist, and have studied a lot of sexual therapy on the side.

"Cog... " he starts weakly.

"Cognitive-analytic. In a nutshell, it means I'm not here to give you answers or tell you how to fix your life."

"Wait... You're not? Isn't that why I'm here?"

"I'm here to help YOU find your own solutions. Every pony has their own way of looking at the world, and there's no way for one solution to work the same for everypony. I'm just here to guide you and work with you."

Shining Armor ponders this for a bit. "That doesn't actually sound too silly, now that I think about it."

"I'm impressed, Mister Armor. Most ponies I meet need a lot of persuasion and explanation on the merits of this form of therapy."

"T-thank you, I guess?"

"It's a good start, anyway. Now, the only way this therapy is going to work is if you are completely honest with me. I will never divulge any information from these sessions to anypony without your consent, so please feel free to tell me everything."

"Everything?" He already feels a blush creeping onto his face. "But... we're talking about, you know..."

"And many other things that you might find very private or intimate. Please consider me only as a tool to help you get better. I will try to stay as neutral as possible. And please refrain from asking any personal questions from me, because I shouldn't answer them." She allows her words a few seconds to sink in before continuing. "We have a shorter session today so we can get acquainted and take care of the official side of things. Do you have any questions before we start?"

Shining Armor shakes his head, more from trying to clear his head from the flood of information than mere nonverbal communication.

"The nurse is fixing up my schedule for next week so we can have the usual one hour sessions twice a week, but due to the nature and... profile of your problem, we made arrangements for us to meet for a shorter time today. Just for us to start the process as soon as possible."

"Profile.... are you telling me that I cut someone in line because I'm a Prince now? I can't have—"

"I only halved my lunch break. Nothing more."

"Oh, sorry," he mutters. There you go, trying to be the knight in shining armour again and just making a foal of yourself.

They spend the next quarter of an hour going over Shining Armor's background information and medical history. Some surprises seem to come to light.

"So let me get this straight, Your Highness. You have actually had seventeen broken bones, five concussions, a mental possession and an 'inability to perform magic due to an infection of cursed crystals'?" She pauses for a moment. "And this is only in the last year?"

"There's been a lot of... stuff. Yeah."

"Seems we have our work cut out for us. Unfortunately this is all the time we have for today. Please ask the nurse if your next appointment has been set up yet."

Shining Armor climbs out of his chair. "So, that's it?" he asks.

"You sound almost disappointed, Mister Armor," Sassy answers with a smile.

"It's just that... I don't know what I was expecting, but it wasn't this."

"If you are referring to ripping open all of your mental wounds in one go and making you feel better in an afternoon; that is not how this works. You need patience. And a lot of time to think. We will only see each other a few times a week, but in the interim you must be the one to work things out for yourself. I will only be here to guide you through the process."

"A lot of time to think, huh," his eyes glaze over as he looks into the distance. "Wonder what that feels like. Seems like I don't have time for anything other than official business lately..." He can't stop himself from yawning, "...or even sleeping."

"I suggest you try to find a way to have a few hours of the day just for yourself. Nopony stays sane if all they do is work. Take a walk, have a cup of tea, look at the falling autumn leaves or what have you. Let's make that your homework for next time." She also gets up from her chair and shakes hooves with Shining Armor. "I'll see you next week."

"Yeah. Thanks." His eyes still a bit glazed over, he walks out to the waiting room, only barely remembering to pick up his chitty for the next appointment before stepping out into the cool autumn air.

Ripping open all of my mental wounds? The hay is she talking about? What am I getting into?

"Take a few hours to yourself, she said. Go have a walk, she said."

Shining Armor finds himself seated near the end of a one-hundred-foot dinner table next to his wife and the Royal Pony Sisters, along with about a hundred other ponies. Immediately after he'd arrived back to the castle, a servant ushered him into his official Princely regalia and off to dinner. Apparently, some hobnob from Manehattan had arrived on a visit, and Shining Armor's presence was mandatory. When he arrived, the Long Table of the dining hall was already full from end to end with ponies, most of them local nobles that had been invited to welcome the group of dignitaries from the East. There were several speeches and a toast to the health of the Princesses (all three of them in turn) and for himself as well.

Shining Armor's stomach made a loud rumbling protest about the fact that the delicious aromas of the not-so-soon-to-be-served dinner wafts into the dining hall from the kitchens.

Why did I have to go and skip breakfast today? Oh right... still in bed. Lunch? Yeah... I was going to get lunch but then... oh yes. The dignitary from wherever had requested my presence because he'd had to wait for me already and oh Dear Celestia I really haven't eaten anything since yesterday morning and I'm going to eat the daffodils in that vase if they don't hurry the fu—

"Your Highness?" A voice close to his ear interrupts his train of thought, derails it, and steals all the gold in the mail cart.

"Yes!?" he exclaims, the rest of the table falling silent at his loud voice. His hoof bumping the table doesn't help his predicament, as several empty goblets fall down on the table. He sheepishly looks to both sides of himself, only to spy the disapproving scowls of the three alicorns to one side, and the worried faces of the guests on the other.

"Ahem... sorry... for that. I kinda... umm... slipped?" he manages to stammer out.

"Prince Armor, are you alright? Have I offended you in some way?" Shining Armor had forgotten the last member of royalty that joined them, Prince Blueblood.

"No, I was just... sorry. What were you saying, Blueblood? Sorry, I meant Prince Blueblood."

"We were talking about the growing tensions at the border between Equestria and the Griffin Kingdoms. Apparently there has been another military incident?" The blonde Prince's voice is as suave and greasy as his mane.

"Oh yes, that. It was just some guardsponies on leave staying out late and having a bit too much salt and accidentally crossing the border in the dark and relieving themselves on the wheel of a Griffin Kingdom border patrol ca..." His ears pick up the noisy silence around him once again. Every pair of eyes is now glued to him, and several jaws are being picked up from the table. "I didn't... I... when I said relieving I meant... umm... resting. Only for a moment, of course. With no further incident. And nopony at all called the Griffin Colonel a 'cutesy fluffy ball of feathers' and tried to kiss her. At all. So the whole thing was just a bit of a misunderstanding and has been resolved."

For some reason, the silence keeps on going, the only sounds in the room being carried from behind the kitchen doors. Prince Blueblood is the first one to speak.

"So, Prince Armor, pardon me if I make sure that I heard this right. You are saying that members of our honourable Royal Guard actually invaded onto foreign territory and performed several acts of vandalism, and got caught in doing so?"

Shining Armor gulps loudly before answering. "Y-yes? But—"

"How awful! Simply awful!" The exaggerated movements of the blonde Prince would put any Prima Donna to shame. His shocked words are mirrored all along the dining table. "But they were caught, right? Have negotiations been started on the perpetrators' release?" he asks, his feigned innocence stoking the conversations along the table even more.

"As a matter of fact they were allowed to sober up in the GriffIn Kingdom's barracks and returned in the morning. And I understand that there were no hard feelings from the Colonel, who... ahem... commented that she didn't really mind their visit but would appreciate if they'd inform them about such visits in the future. And... uhm... I hear she's started going out with one of the guardsponies."

"But... but such travesty! Have the ponies in question been court-martialed and removed from the Guard?"

"Err... I understand that their commanding officer gave them a stern talking to and cleaning duty for a few weeks—"

"Fillies and Gentlecolts," the majestic voice of Princess Celestia causes the growing murmurs along the table to cease. "I must interrupt your most charming conversation, but the first course is about to be served. I hope you all enjoy the meal."

As the plate of warm soup is carefully set in front of him, Shining Armor finds that he has lost his appetite. He gambles a quick glance at his wife seated next to her. Her face is completely calm and serene. She turns to look at him and gives him a warm smile with her eyes closed.

I'm dead. I'm so dead.

And which spoon am I supposed to use again?

After the dinner, the guests that would be staying in the castle are escorted to their rooms, and the Princesses bid farewell to the rest. After the last guest leaves, Cadance shortly excuses herself and exits, not waiting for her husband.

Shining Armor contemplates on going to apologise to the Royal Pony Sisters for his faux pas, but one look in their direction convinces him otherwise. He opts to chase after Cadance instead.

He tries not to run, but can't help himself from quickening his pace. The empty corridors echo the sound of his hooves around him, tolling the bells for his own execution. In no time at all, he finds himself outside the door to his and Cadance's suite. He steps in, expecting a furious verbal assault to knock him down onto his rump, but none comes.

The calm before the storm. I'm SO dead.

Cadance hasn't put any lights on yet, and is sitting on one of the couches in the parlour. With hesitant steps, Shining Armor walks next to her and sits down. He picks up her forehoof between his own before starting his plea for mercy.

"Cady, I'm really sorry. I messed the whole dinner up and I made myself and everypony else look like foals and I didn't mean to—"

"Shiny—"

"And I know you've taught me so much about etiquette and what to do and what to say and I completely forgot everything today and I know that I did everything wrong except maybe outright vomiting on the table—"

"Shiny, wait—"

"I'm sure that Celestia and Luna hate my guts right now and I was so tired and hungry and the last few days have been so busy and chaotic thamMMPHM?" His self-loathing is interrupted by Cadance forcefully pushing their lips together in a deep kiss. It goes on for a good, long while before she finally backs away for some air.

"Now that I finally got you to shut up, Shiny, let me tell you one thing," she says and climbs to sit in Shining Armor's lap and putting her forehooves around his head. "I am not angry, nor am I disappointed. You might have been a bit rough around the edges at dinner today, but you did nothing that you should be ashamed of."

"But Prince Blueblood—"

"Cousin BB would find indignation in how the plates are set or how the curtains fold if there was nothing else. And everypony else goes along with his tirades because he holds good parties with lots of tasty food and they want to get invited."

Shining Armor pulls Cadance closer and they share a few short kisses before they lean in to touch their horns together.

"I thought you'd be angry because you looked so... I dunno... official?" he says.

"Official, is it?" She lands a small kiss onto her husband's muzzle. "It took all of my composure to not burst out laughing with how flustered Blueblood got."

"So... you're honestly truly not angry at me, Cady?" he asks as he puts his own hooves around Cadance's rump.

"Well... you might need a repeat lesson on which utensils to use in the table. Blueblood's face went bright red when you used a dessert spoon to eat your soup."

"I KNEW I should have used the bigger one. But I thought we'd be having ice cream as dessert so I wanted to save the big one for that."

Cadance giggles and rubs their muzzles together. "You're hopeless."

"And you love me for it," he says in a confident voice.

"I do, do I? Have I fallen in love with a rascally scoundrel who doesn't even remember to wipe his mouth before drinking?"

"That too, huh?"

"Yes, and so many other things, Mister Armor, that I think you should go back to school and learn everything all over again," she says in a stern, motherly voice.

"And I'll have Mistress Cadenza there to teach me every step of the way." He lands several kisses onto Cadance's neck.

"Watch it, young stallion. You might have to do corner time if you don't study hard," she whispers into his ear.

He moves his hooves up and down along her buttocks. "You'd like that, would you?"

"Mmmmh. You are a naughty little Prince, aren't you?" she says in a deep whisper.

They lock lips once more and this time they don't even bother to stop as their bodies rub against each other. Cadance's backside moves along Shining Armor's hind legs, squeezing them against the cushions of the sofa. He moves his hooves further behind the mare, but can't quite reach far enough to touch her tail. She pushes him back once more, her hooves pushing him down hard on his shoulders, making him lean back. He grunts from the slight pain, which Cadance only takes as a sign of pleasure. He once again tries to reach around her, this time to play with her wings, but is pushed back down. Her hind hooves squeeze together and make Shining Armor's legs hurt from the pressure.

"Cady, I—"

"Shhh, dear. I've got it covered."

"But—" he winces from pain.

"Shhh. Now come here, you." Cadance moves back a bit so she is standing with her hindhooves on the floor. Her horn begins to glow, and the same glow soon surrounds Shining Armor. Before he can protest, he is lifted gently into the air like a tiny colt and carried to their bedroom.

"Cady, put me down!" he shouts, his own horn starting to gather energy as well.

"Oh don't be like that. Mama is going to make you feel really good—"

"I. Said. Put. Me. DOWN!" With the last word, his magic turns against his wife's and breaks the levitation spell, dropping him onto the floor next to their bed, and knocking Cadance backward.

"Shiny, what—" she asks in confusion, her eyes spinning from the force of Shining Armor's magic.

"I told you to let me go! You really shouldn't use levitation spells on an adult pony," he says angrily.

"But... I thought... I... " her voice trembles from surprise and fear, "I thought it would be cute... and we were doing so well and I thought we could... "

"We could what, make love?" he says coldly. "Sorry, but don't you understand that I CAN'T!? Even though how much I want to, I can't do it, because there's something wrong with my head! And that's the stupid reason I have to go to that stupid therapy and talk about all of my... all of OUR personal stuff with a total stranger that smells like old wooly socks and lavender candles and cabbage. And she told me there would be something like 'emotional scars' or 'opening wounds' and I don't like it! I don't even really want to go! AT ALL!"

He finishes his rant and turns to look at Cadance. She just sits on the floor with her mouth agape, staring at him. Shining Armor sits down on the bed and puts his head against his forehooves as he leans forward. His heart thumps so loud he can feel it in his ears, and his mouth has run completely dry. All he can do is pant.

After a while, he whispers from between his hooves, "Sorry."

Cadance slowly gets up from the floor and sits next to him on the bed. She lays a comforting hoof on his shoulder, and he collapses onto her lap, the release of stress making his eyes water. "I don't know what's wrong with me! I don't understand any of this. Any of this Prince thing or any of that psycho stuff. I... I'm not smart like Twily or you. I'm just... me." The rest of his words are too quiet to hear.

Cadance holds his head on her lap and brushes his mane. It doesn't take too long for Shining Armor to get a hold of himself and get up. They sit side by side, and embrace each other in a tight hug.

"Feeling better, honey?" Cadance asks.

"Yeah. Must be the lack of sleep or something. Or maybe it's something I ate with the wrong fork?" He tries to chuckle at his own joke, but fails miserably. They hold on to one another for a while longer before they let go and just sit against each other in the silent darkness.

"You're going to go through with the therapy?"

"Yeah." Even the thought of the therapy to come makes him wince. "I'm starting next week. And the doctor also asked for you to go talk to the therapist sometime too, if it's okay?"

"I'd like that," she answers with a warm voice.

"You would?"

"Of course. It's to help you, so I'd be more than happy to do it."

Shining Armor puts his forehoof onto his wife's lap. "Cady... have I told you how much I love you?"

"I love you too, Shiny."

They share a long, loving kiss, before both of them climb into bed, too exhausted from the events of the day and too little sleep the night before to even take off their clothes. They fall asleep, still holding each other in a gentle embrace, and they soon fill the bedroom with their snores.

Author's Notes:

This was the most heavily edited chapter I have ever written. Mostly because I asked several people to help me with editing, and becoming my editor in the future. So a great many thanks to
-Fantasmagoria
-Bronydragon
-Invictus_rising and
-Kopa

You all did a wonderful job.