Confessions of an Immortal Time Lord

Bad Moon (Part 4)

***

What would one do if they were to hear that they, in fact, were a transmitter of ancient magic, bound to defeat some kind of Ancient Evil coming from another planet to feed upon ponies' magic? A brave pony would definitely brace themselves to meet the terrifying alien. A normal pony would gasp in fear but eventually admit they have to face the music. A meek pony would probsbly run off and hide. What did Fluttershy do when she heard it?

She fainted.

The Doctor didn't expect such a reaction. The almighty Time Lord, who must have known every possible consequence of every possible action found himself in lack of understanding. Indeed, such a reaction was strange and probably a bit too severe, for The Doctor actually had explained that The Elements would be victorious, banishing Nightmare Moon. Fluttershy, knowing this and believing the strange brown earth pony, still did what she did.

The Doctor jumped up and started running in circles, trying to find a solution. It was so new for him - an unexpected situation, something he didn't foresee. (Later, I realised it was a time paradox, involving a minor crack in the Time-Space continuum. At that time, however, I was really frightened. For a moment, I even thought that I had lost my powers somehow! - T.L.)

Angel shook his head, astonished by the Time Lord's dumbness and sheer idiocy (Hey, Narrator! Watch your tongue!), and made his way towards the kitchen to get a glass of water for Fluttershy and snatch a snack by the way. He was hungry, after all!

After a few seconds of fervent running (18.57 seconds, to be exact. - Time Lords, ruining the narration since the Beginning of Time), The Doctor noticed that the yellow pony was not coming to her senses and, to make matters worse, the goddamn bunny had escaped somehow. He reached Fluttershy and put a hoof to her chest. It was neither rising nor falling. Not a single breath could be heard. The brown earth pony turned pale the next instant. He couldn't believe his eyes: he knew that at the moment of fainting, the heart could have stopped, but it must have returned to its normal rhythm by that time. It was crystal clear that something went wrong: either the pegasi' bodies were maladjusted to fainting or Fluttershy was really easy to be frightened to death. Literally.

The Doctor quickly brushed up all the information about first aid that he could find in the mazes of his complicated mind. Artificial ventilation. The Doctor shook his head in frustration. That was not an option.

Artificial. Ventilation. The thought haunted the poor Time Lord's head. Maybe that was an option? Like... a last resort?

ARTIFICIAL. VENTILATION. NOW. Or she dies... The Doctor muttered something under his breath and, building up his courage, lowered his head over Fluttershy's. Desperately looking around and finding no cloth or gauze he could use as an interlaying, he firmly pressed his lips to the yellow pegasus' mouth, breathing fresh air into her lungs. What happened next, however, made his jump away in fear. The pegasus smiled, hesitantly opening her eyes.

"What a dream..." She whispered and sat up on the sofa. Upon looking at the shocked Doctor, she widened her eyes in sudden realization. Then, she blushed and hid her face under the sheets.

After regaining his composure, the Time Lord realised that Fluttershy thought it to have been a kiss and, smiling (using The Charming And Disabling Time Lord's Smile [TM], no less! - T.L.) broadly, moved towards her, putting a comforting hoof on her shoulder. The yellow let out a surprised yelp and carefully put out her head, looking at The Doctor both horrified and curiously.

"Fluttershy, that was an act of artificial ventilation, nothing more," The earth pony assured her. For an instant he could swear he saw her face fade in disappointment.

"Oh," she managed to say. "Okay. I have just thought..." And, as she had often done before, the shy pegasus finished her phrase quietly, mumbling under her breath.

I reeeeaally hope she hasn't a crush on me... The Doctor thought, not changing his face expression.

Fluttershy stood up, slightly shaking, gladly leaning at the brown pony's shoulder he had offered to her for support.

"So... Why would you want to do... um... that to me?" She whispered ever so quietly. Fortunately, the Time Lord was near her so he could hear that hesitant shadow of a question.

The Doctor raised his brow. "Oh, that artificial ventilation?" He frowned. "Well, you see, your heart wasn't beating so..."

Fluttershy's ears dropped.

"Oh my... I have fainted many times but I've never experienced apparent death..." She was just about to faint again when Angel suddenly entered the room, holding a galss of water in his paw.

The Doctor sent him a glare, which the rabbit countered with mastery achieved through his life-long experience. The white bunny came up to Fluttershy and passed her the glass.

The meek pegasus patted him on the back of his head. "Oh, bunny!" She cooed nicely. "You are so caring! I'm so glad I have you!" She almost exclaimed. (But almost whispered, nevertheless... I wonder, how she does it? ... How she did it, I mean... I miss her. I miss them all. - T.L.)

The sinister bunny grinned, triumphantly looking at The Doctor.

The Time Lord easily conceded his right to be Fluttershy's favorite critter to Angel, slightly bowing his head in acceptance of his defeat.

After drinking the water, Fluttershy instantly felt better. Angel left the room, giving the earth pony an understanding wink that could be interpreted both as 'I know what you two are up to, bro, and I won't interfere. Go get her, tiger!' and 'You realise the water is special, right? I'll teach you the trick later.' The Doctor hoped it was the second kind.

Upon the bunny's departure, silence endured in the small cottage. The Time Lord looked out of the window.

The sun was ready to descend step by step down its invisible ladder. Most ponies couldn't stand the heat and hid in their houses, waiting for the evening, when the temperature would be more merciful. Others (those were mostly foals) happily roamed across Equestria's evergreen summer fields, rolling on the ground. In the park, young couples were sharing quick kisses, too scared to be noticed to really enjoy them.

The Doctor's contemplation was interrupted by Fluttershy's question. Alas, he was so lost in the scenery that he had to ask her to repeat.

"I said... um... Have you checked it? If my heart really wasn't beating... Maybe I have to ask Nurse Redheart about it..."

The brown pony nodded.

"Yes, Fluttershy, I have. In fact, I've laid my ear on the right side of your chest twice, with an interval of... let me see... 14.86 seconds, and I swear I couldn't hear a beat!"

"Doctor..."

"Not a single one!"

"Doctor."

"Of course, one time's not enough, I said to myself, so..."

"Doctor!" Fluttershy screamed. (When the Narrator says 'screamed' about Fluttershy, he means 'said in a little-higher-than-lower-than-normal-for-most-ponies voice. But that was loud enough for me, for sure. - T.L.)

"Yes, Fluttershy?" The Doctor looked at the once more blushing pegasus.

"A pony's heart is located at the left side of their chest..." She said again in an unexpectedly firm voice. "So my heart was beating... And it was a kiss, then..." She smiled and her blush turned to the deepest shade of red the embarassed Time Lord had ever seen.

"Um... Fluttershy... I just didn't know a thing about ponies' vascular system..." He managed to reason her.

The pegasus kept staring at her hooves and blushing but repeated even more firmly: "It was a kiss. An occasional one, but a kiss nevertheless."

The Doctor was so impressed by the sudden change in the pegasus' assertiveness level that he decided to be diplomatic on the matter.

"O-kay, Fluttershy... Whatever you want to believe... A kiss it was, then," he said, making Fluttershy's eyes lit with pride.

Hello, this is The Doctor. I'm interrupting our outstanding Narrator here, for this is an urgent moment. Remember it. Because of the afore-mentioned phrase, the whole history of Equestria could have gone wrong. I will tell about it another time; just remember that I almost ruined the world due to my natural idiocy... Although I'm a genius, mind you!

***

The idillic silence was rudely interrupted by a loud knocking at the door. The Doctor rose from his place and trotted to the door, opening it, only to see panting Twilight before his eyes.

The lavender unicorn raised a brow, upon looking at the still embarassed earth pony and blushing Fluttershy. She grinned and let out a chuckle.

"Oh... Never in my life have I imagined that you two would become so close... You're a ladies man, Doctor!" She said with a stupid smirk. (You see, even the Narrator's on my side! It was stupid! - T.L.)

The Doctor groaned, while the pegasus softly let out a laugh.

"No, Twilight, it's not that way..." She said, her voice soft as a feather.

The Time Lord let out a relieved sigh.

Twilight couldn't resist Fluttershy's kind simplicity so she nodded.

"I see, Fluttershy. Sorry for accusing you," she said almost guiltily.

"We just happened to share a kiss," Fluttershy cheerfully concluded, raising her head.

The Doctor seemed to have choked with something, although he wasn't chewing anything.

Twilight froze in place, her witty brain trying to perform a thousand calculating operations to make sure she was awake, fully sane and concious.

"What." The librarian flatly said. It was more of an affirmative sentence than a question, really.

"You don't want to know..." The Time Lord sighed. "It ended up being a quick one, after all," he concluded.

"WHAT." Twilight raised her voice a bit.

"Hehe, Fluttershy... We'll be back soon!" The Doctor charmingly smiled (The Charming And Disabling Time Lord's Smile [TM], remember? - T.L.) at the blushing pegasus, leaving the cottage and swiftly closing the door behind his back.

"Take care..." Fluttershy said to the door before her. The two ponies had already begun their way anywhere far from Fluttershy's place (The addition's mine, by the way. I seem to enjoy interrupting the narration, you know? - T.L.)

When Twilight snapped out of her shock, she realised she was being pushed by the brown earth pony all the way.

"Hey! Let me go, you!" She yelled at The Doctor, stepping aside and standing erect, trying to regain her lost pride.

The Time Lord shrugged.

"So, how's Honesty?" He wondered.

"Applejack, you mean? She's fine. What's more, she understood the situation perfectly and agreed to assist us." Twilight replied.

The Doctor approvinly nodded.

"Moreover, Rainbow Dash happened to be around the farm..." Twilight paused. "Yeah... appeared to be... every day... for hours..." Then she mumbled something under her breath, something involving a 'mental note'.

"Aand?" The Doctor tried to mentally shake the unicorn's mind.

"Oh! And she heard everything and agreed to help us too. No wonder she's the Element of Loyalty!" Twilight cheerfully finished her report.

"Fantastic!" The Time Lord exclamed. "So can you show me the way to Canterlot now, please?"

The lavender mare shook her head.

"I'm sorry, Doctor, but there are still two Elements left: Laughter and Generousity. And you will help me," she firmly stated.

"These aren't the droids you're looking for?" The Doctor asked, grinning widely. "Your Jedi tricks don't work on me, Twilight."

Twilight blinked.

"Um... What?" She asked, concerned that the brown pony might have had a severe head injury or something.

"Star Wars? Obi Wan?" The Time Lord tried.

Twilight sighed, questioning The Doctor's sanity for whatever-it-was-th time that day.

"Anyway," she said. "I may need your help with one of those ponies. The Element of Generousity is Rarity the fashionista..."

"No!" The Doctor interrupted her, his eyes widened. "No! No more beautiful mares for today. I won't be able to bear it." And I may break the Time-Space continuum, he thought.

The unicorn automatically checked her hair.

"Why, Doctor, it's so nice of you..." She was obviously flattered.

The cunning Time Lord grinned.

"When I said 'no more beautiful mares', I meant Fluttershy," he said.

"Ah, you-" Twilight wanted to swear but managed to hold her urge to do it. Instead, she met The Doctor with her own grin. (A veeery sly one, if I may say! - T.L.)

"Will you invite me to your clearly approaching wedding or do I have to ask Fluttershy to send me an invitation?" She countered The Doctor's mockery.

"Not playing," he coldly replied.

"Maybe I could be her mare of honor..." Twilight almost sang, in her vain attempt of mockery.

Or not so vain...

The Doctor groaned but quickly regained his composure.

"Okay," he finally said. "I'll meet with Laughter, then. Pinkamena Pie... Where does she live?"

"Sugarcube Corner, the local bakery and sweets shop," The unicorn replied.

"She likes to be called 'Pinkie'!" She shouted towards The Doctor, who galloped away towards the centre of Ponyville.

"By Celestia's beard..." Twilight swore at last. "I so wish it were all a dream..."

She pinched her coat.

"Ouch!" She yelled. Then she sighed.

It was not a dream, unfortunately... Or fortunately?

Without giving way to such thoughts, Twilight trotted towards the Carousel Boutique.

***

Next on the Confessions!

~~~

"I'm Pinkie Pie but my friends call me Pinkie but now I'm a cherry tree because to make cherry jam you have to look eeeexactly like a cherry tree and that's why I'm dressed like this - do you like it - and oh my I shouldn't speak because trees don't usually speak - of course they sometimes do but on veeeery rare occasions!"

~~~

"-and I wonder what a Time Lord is doing here in Equestria?"

"Um... What? How... How do you know about me?"

~~~

"HUMANS?"

"Yes, humans! You know, these creatures that walk on two legs and have fingers and-"

"I know, Pinkie."

~~~

"You need to save Equestria from some... how to put this nicely... 'Ancient Evil' and-"

"Nightmare Moon?"

"How did you... Don't tell me you travel through Time, too!"

"No, dummy, of course not! I'm not a Time Lord - you are a Time Lord, remember?"

~~~

"-And that's how I got my cutie mark!"

"Pinkie.. That's the story of how Equestria was made..."

~~~

"Canterlot? It's that big city near the mountain! Why would Twilight need to show it to you? It's visible from any place in Equestria, dummy!"

~~~

"Twitchy eye, Twilight. He's going to..."

"Celestia help us now..."

***

Author's note.

Look - no lyrical digressions here! I think I've compensated the last chapter.

Please, comment and rate. Rate and comment. Then comment some more. Your comments are making me feel happy. You want me to be happy, don't you?

I know that deep in your heart, you do. :doctorwink:

Peace.