Hello. If you are reading this, you are probably dead by now. There is no need to be afraid of it. Please don't panic. If you are dead, it doesn't mean you are not alive. I know it is hard to explain but you will probably undestand it as time will pass.

Time... Time is the God I worshipped... And the Devil that destroyed itself, taking me with it.

But where are my manners? My name is The Doctor. You have probably never heard of me before as my last visit to Equestria occured long before you took this book in your hooves. I am a pony of many names and characters; in fact, I'm not quite a pony. I've been an earth pony (twice), a pegasus (twice as well) and a unicorn (which was only once, and I still miss my horn). There were times when I had to live as a human... But that's in the past. Or in the future. I don't remember exactly. You must forgive me for this: several thousand years are quite a time to forget such things.

I believe you are thinking that you are insane right now. There is some truth in this: if you weren't at least a little insane, this book wouldn't have opened itself to you. I am writing this in a hurry: I have only a couple hundred years to finish this... That's ten hours in Equestria, if my dull memory serves me correct. You must have a lot of questions right now; too bad there is no one around to answer them. And, as you cannot leave this place, you have no choice but to read further. I have to apologize in advance for my writing style - I'm not too much of a writer myself - and lyrical digressions. As much as I love action and adventures, I still need to provide some explanations alongside. If you want to read about my adventures in Equestria, I'd suggest you skip this introduction and jump straight to the first chapter.

Oh, I totally forgot: you cannot read the next chapter without having finished the previous one... Heh... My invention, sorry. So, you have to sit back in a comfortable chair (press 56 on the panel on the right - the chair will appear behind you) and read my mumbling about how ponies and other species (mostly ponies, in this case) contributed to the destruction of their world - and the Universe.

***

Confessions of an Immortal Time Lord

Irreversible

***

What are most colts and fillies taught at school? They are taught that time is irreversible. Irreversible. Not reversible, in other words. They say you can't change the order of events that occur. They say time can't flow backwards.

If you truly want to understand this book, you must forget everything you were taught at school during your foalhood. Time doesn't flow. It just is. It simply exists. The past, the present and the future are happening at the same time (pun intended; sorry, just couldn't help making a bad joke), staying apart but interfering, while trying not to interfere. They collide and collapse and fall apart. They guide your lives and are guided by me. Time is the Matter and differs from the Matter. It is the Space and fights the Space in an eternal struggle.

Have I broken your mind yet? Good. You are ready for the awful and painful truth. And do not think I do it for the sole purpose of scaring you, no. I will talk about brighter situations, but only when it is needed. The thing is, you are going to experience most bizarre things whilst reading my story. It isn't entitled 'Confessions' for nothing: I transfer my guilt to you.

Allons-y!

***

Have you ever imagined living alone? I'm not talking about your foalhood dreams: living without your family, being self-dependent, rebellious and mature etc, etc. When I say alone, I mean alone. Let's take the Moon, for example. A perfect place to experience true loneliness. Luna... That's Princess Luna for you, mind it! So, as I was saying, Luna lived there for a thousand years, with no one to talk to, with no one to share her thoughts with, with no one to turn to and cry on their shoulder... Except me, of course. But that's a story for another chapter: There is time and place for everything, as we Time Lords say. Now that you imagine living alone for a thousand years, think about how it is like to be alone for eternity. Huh? What do I mean - eternity? I mean forever, like a certain pink pony would have said... I miss her. I miss them all.

You must forgive me again: I'm losing my trail of thought once more. It's difficult to write a decent and interesting story, especially when your thoughts are jumping and colliding in your head and, what's more important, when you are telling the truth.

So, loneliness. What does it mean for a common pony? Let's take a look at how you would have acted in such a situation.

The first day.

You are surprised, amazed and even a bit happy. You set out on a journey to explore the surroundings. You are ready to see all that the Moon can show you.

A week passed.

Stones and dust. Some more stones. Some more dust. You cannot believe your eyes. Is it really all there is? Is it all this magnificent planet can show you? Alas, you are right. The Moon wasn't created to show you anything. It just exists. For no purpose. There is no purpose of anything, in fact. You see, the meaning of the Universe is...

Aaand back to the Moon! Remind me to tell you about the meaning of the Universe later, will you?

A month passed.

You are depressed. You miss your home, your parents, your friends. You hope that someday you will be able to return there. You begin mentally forgiving your enemies. Sometimes you pray to your God. Ah, too bad there is no God. In fact, there is something you would call the God, but not exactly. Erm... losing trail of thought again, right? *Sigh*...

A year passed.

You think you've come to terms with the situation by this time. You believe this is either a challenge your God put before you or a punishment for your sins. You are sure you deserved it. You will not lose your faith, for it is the only thing that keeps you sane. You think so, but you will be mistaken.

Five years passed.

And you thought you were sane, huh? After five years of praying, crying and falling on your knees, you raise you voice and shout into the lifeless sky, cursing your God and all It stands for. Then you realise what you have done. You collapse on the rocks in horror. You pledge allegiance to your God once more, you ask for forgiveness... Time and forgiveness go together, for your information. As time passes, ponies are eager to forgive - and forget. Why? I have a nice theory, albeit a little short: it happens due to fear of death. Ponies think: Oh my, what if I die without fogiving my kin and friends? And I must forgive my enemies as well, or else I'll go to Hell etc, etc. There's no such thing as Hell, mind you. I tried to make it once but failed miserably. Needed more energy and sulphur for the fusion... Ahem, anyway! Ponies don't forgive because they want to. They forgive because they need to.

Ten years passed.

Ten years on the Moon. Ten years alone. Ten years in complete silence. You don't know what to believe in anymore. You don't know what to do. You have no hope left. Your thoughts begin to crawl towards a very dangerous field: suicide. You try to shake them off. You fail again.

After trying to find a single way of painlessly killing yourself, you understand that you have no such privilege. You can't kill yourself. Interesting, right?

And now there are two possible ways your life will follow: either you turn completely insane or die of ageing.

Why did I tell you all of this just now? To show you three main points of life: it is cruel; it is pointless; it must end.

Everything must cease. Be it a blessing or a curse, death wiill always come. Unfortunately, not for me. Even being dead, I'm bound to be alive. Alive and alone.

***

But that's not the point I was trying to make. Irreversible, right? Remeber where we stopped? Good.

So time isn't irreversible. Then why can't I manipulate it, you may ask me? Good question. But I have an even better answer: because you will destoy the world. But I just want to reverse my mistakes/bring back my loved ones/return my youth etc, etc.!, you will exclaim. To your displeasure, I easily parry: Time is not a commodity to be consumed, nor is it a lump of clay for you to play with. Each pony who remains alive when they should be dead; each mistake that should have happened but didn't; each step your hooves make where they shouldn't have touched the ground - it all wounds Time. You noticed that I began to write Time with a capital letter, right? That's because you are ready to learn the most shocking truth about Time. It is alive. It is a living being that can be hurt like any other.

Besides, if you stop to speculate for a while, you will definitely come to a conclusion: Reversing your mistakes doesn't always bring you happiness.

Imagine a perfect Equestria. Tia... I mean, Celestia... That's Princess Celestia for you, mind it! (Have I said it before?) So, Celestia never banished Luna to the Moon because Nightmare Moon never appeared. In that case, the Elements of Harmony would have never been attached to the Last Bearers. Twilight Sparkle wouldn't have found her true love and thus never have children. Equestria would  have never divided and the class system would become stricter and stricter... But there would be no rebels to lead the revolution - Twilight Sparkle died alone, remeber? After the Princesses' death (you cannot reverse death, you can only postpone it), the Griffins would have invaded Equestria and destroyed or enslaved all its citizens. It's a beautiful future, isn't it?

Or let's travel back in time and prevent Discord from being born, shall we? In that case, Star Swirl the Bearded wouldn't have lost his wings. So, Celestia and Luna wouldn't have been born and after Star Swirl's death, there would be no Equestria, only a shattered world, filled with hate and despair...

Now that you think it about it, it becomes clearer, doesn't it? Time and forgiveness... Time and Mystery... Time and Hesitance... I believe I've heard these lines before...

And now we've come to a wonderful deduction: time is irreversible. How is that possible? You will ask me. Well, I'm not making contradictions at all. Time is reversible and irreversible. At the same time. (Really, that pun is getting old...) It is reversible in a way that it can be reversed. It is irreversible in a way that it must not be reversed.

Fortunately, no beings in the Universe can control Time. Apart from us Time Lords. Life is unfair, you think. There is no such thing as justice, I say. And I am right. Why? Because I know everything. Yes, by everything I mean everything. I'm not arrogant (well, maybe a little), it is just this way. I am immortal. I am bound to be immortal. And this blessing is my ultimate and only curse.

So do you want to proceed to breathtaking adventures and (some) philosophical reflections?

Allons-y!

***

Next on the Confessions!

~~~

"But what are you-"

"Right now we need to gather some information about the so-called 'Elements of Harmony' since Equestria will soon be attacked by a powerful alien who will easily destroy it and swallow the magic of all unicorns. And also devour them."

~~~

"What... was it?"

"Memory transfer. Fascinating, isn't it? Now let's go to sleep! We need to be up at five to seven in order to achieve our goal!"

"What goal?"

~~~

"The bed's large enough for two."

"No. Bucking. Way."

***

Author's Note.

My Little Pony is (c) by Hasbro. Doctor Who is (c) by BBC. Contrary to popular belief, the phrase 'Alons-y' is not copyrighted because it is a common French phrase used now and then. And if you wonder where The Doctor heard 'those lines', go play Braid by Jonathan Blow. It's awesome, really.

Please leave your comments. Peace.