I lounged on my worn but oh-so-comfortable couch, draped across the cushions with my head tilted back to count the bumps on the ceiling. Not that I got much counting done. The image of Etherea stretching over the counter, residual moisture slicking down her mane, coat, and tail, was etched in the front of my mind. Not simply because 'wet' was an amazing look for her. Nor was it so much that her pose had accentuated the long, toned lines of her entire body. Those reasons were certainly very important to why I couldn't keep her out of my mind, but no, the image lingered more because seeing her like that had been a point of epiphany.

I liked how she looked. But why? She was a pony.

Quadrupedal and be-hooved were only two of the more obvious signs of her equine nature. Her tail, muzzle, ears, and even... more private features... (apparently my thoughts could blush - who knew?) ...were more superficially horse-like than hominid. Her wings and horn? Okay, I had no idea where they fit in this so I shelved them for later.

I would go so far to say that she was about as far from human as you could get. And some part of me didn't care. How fucked up is that?

Sure she had some human features; large forward-facing eyes, eyebrows, and flexible, speech-capable lips all marked her as not 'just an animal.' Her bone structure certainly looked far too fine to be designed for grazing, so she wasn't really a horse. But her face was still largely defined by the shape of her muzzle. And muzzles were a horse thing. And dogs, cats to an extent, deer... I could go on. It was definitely not a human feature.

Her legs were certainly more animal than human. Being capped by hooves made them better for running than for fine manipulation. Yet I remembered how the joints of her forelegs had shown an impressive range of motion as she gestured. She had motioned, twisted, pointed, waved, and even fought a grueling battle with a bottle of syrup. A horse couldn't have managed simple lifting much less squeezing.

Her... torso? What was the proper name for that section of equine anatomy anyway? Either way her barrel was shorter and thinner, and her stomach was less potbellied than any horse's. She was much more... svelte. Her midsection was more flexible too, judging by her efforts at the bathroom counter. She didn't quite match up with my mental image of a horse.

Having a mane and tail, on the other hand, were distinctly equine characteristics. Her long neck - yet another nonhuman feature - resulted in a completely different hair pattern than humans were capable of. Humans were also completely lacking in the tail department, so she was clearly very different from myself.

Everything that marked her as not being a horse was mostly in the small details. If her greater profile was strikingly equine, then why was I attracted to her?

Maybe it had been the roughly bipedal look given by standing on her hind legs. Two arms, two legs, and shoulders and hips in roughly the right places. Her mane and tail could possibly be mistaken as just long hair from behind - really long hair certainly - but maybe possible if I didn't look too closely. Or squinted. The 'little' details like her muzzle, hooves, and equine ears might also be overlooked if you weren't too picky.

No, I'd have to be fucking blind to overlook all of that.

So I still couldn't explain my feelings. Even if I could blame it on me being a 'leg man' - and Etherea did have four wonderfully long and lean legs - she was just too different from the human normal no matter how hard I tried to find similarities. Her greater profile was very horse-like and that wasn't nearly as bothersome as I felt it should be.

I sighed while following the progress of a small spider across the ceiling. There was a simpler explanation, though one that made my stomach twist. It stemmed from my time on the internet as a My Little Pony fan. After the better part of a decade being online I had been exposed to the best, the worst, and nearly everything inbetween. My Little Pony was no different - I had seen both the best and worst.

That said, some of the pony fan art coming from the darkest reaches of the fandom made the characters look damned sexy. Rainbow Dash wearing a bikini bottom, Rarity tied up with rope, Princess Celestia dressed as a maid, just about anything with Fleur... especially the Celestia stuff for me. Those weren't even anthropomorphized versions either. Many artists did magnificent jobs at making ponies look sultry and inviting. Which meant that some part of me was attracted to ponies.

Except that artwork is stylized and often highly so. It was a completely different animal from where I was now...

I could tell this wasn't going to be explained away. I had to admit that I was also attracted to the real thing. Real ponies. But if I was attracted to real ponies, that meant... I didn't like where these thoughts were going.

I practically leapt from the warm embrace of the couch in a sudden flurry of action. The groceries still hadn't been put away and Craig wasn't likely to wake up for a while. If nothing else, organizing the kitchen was a welcome distraction from the downward spiral in my head.

Not that I was going to get much of a reprieve while living with an attractive pony - a point that was driven home when I found Etherea standing in the hallway. She was facing Craig's room with her head low and ears at attention. Her wings were spread as much as the narrow hall allowed and she was draped from neck to tail in a mass of damp multicolored towels. From my angle everything was hidden except her wings, tail, and the lower halves of her legs; like she was some sort of wildly-colored, winged monster composed solely of towels. She'd fit right in on Sesame Street.

My burst of laughter made her spin around, her ears flipping backwards again as her eyes sought me out. To my great relief she managed to miss hitting both sides of the entryway.

Neither the close call with another concussion nor her accusing glower could fully dampen the sight of her wearing a small mountain of towels. I apparently needed to get serious though, because she didn't look nearly as amused as I felt. Oh well.

"What?" It was almost a bark.

"Um... You look..." I stopped that thought cold. "Well, you are wearing a lot of towels there." I motioned at her with a hand while fighting back a smile. I wasn't winning.

Etherea bent her neck around to look at her flank and tensed when she caught sight of herself - one of her ears twitched. She sighed and had to fight back a chuckle as her wings drooped a little. When she turned back she challenged me with her eyes, but there was an orange tinge around her ears and cheeks.

"I... didn't know where... to put them." Her voice also betrayed a conflicting mix of amusement and indignation.

"It's okay. There's a basket in the corner of my room behind the door."

She took one last look in to Craig's room before heading deeper in to the apartment. The whole encounter had me curious so I went to the hall and peeked through the doorway to Craig's room, though that revealed nothing out of the ordinary. I had no idea what might interest her so much. At least not right away. I realized that as the first pony on Earth literally everything was new to her whether mundane or not. With that in mind I looked around again.

The various knicknacks and band posters might be troves of new information, and the random crumpled articles of clothing that dotted the various surfaces likely concealed more. The rock station playing softly on his radio was probably a totally new sound to her and from a wondrous device - but considering her own device I doubted that. The man on the bed likely begged a great many questions. What kind of person was he? Why was he wearing such a run down outfit? Why was he sleeping on his stomach with his face buried in the pillow? The partially ajar closet door was certainly hiding something from an inquisitive pony.

I chuckled. It was hard to imagine that this disorganized and slightly messy bedroom would actually hold anything that warranted such attention. Then again, there were entire TV shows devoted to finding treasure in places like these.

My amusement didn't last long though. I was looking over the guy who had chosen to go to sleep rather than keep an eye on the visiting alien dignitary. I didn't really expect that Craig could have done much if something big had happened - more ponies showing up, someone seeing her from the outside, Etherea going on a killing spree, etc. - but that wasn't the point. I didn't want her to feel abandoned when she already had so little. I needed to have a talk with Craig about that.

I turned away from Craig's room and jumped when I found Etherea right behind me, a single pink towel lying across her back. I still couldn't figure out how, but she was damned stealthy for a hooved animal.

Pony. She's a pony, damnit. I resolved to always refer to her as intelligent no matter how similar her form was to a horse's. I might have to come up with something other than 'pony' though - maybe 'sapient equinomorph.'

I glared at her halfheartedly, but that just made her grin a little.

"Is that... human music?" She angled her head to peer around me. She really was quite cute with a curious expression and perked ears.

"It's one kind." I tilted my head to the side to better hear the radio. The current song was slow but heavy; it sounded like the Deftones. While not one of the bands I would go out of my way for, I usually enjoyed the change of pace whenever they came on. "I think this is a group called The Deftones. Even among the normal music this station plays they're unique since most of the station's stuff is faster-paced. I think only Alice in Chains is similar." I stopped there and bit my tongue as I suddenly worried how she would take a name like 'Alice in Chains.'

But she didn't react in any of the ways I expected given the name's imagery: shock, confused anger, or any other of a dozen shades of upset. Instead she quietly sounded it out to herself. Maybe I was being too cautious with her. Though after this morning I felt much safer taking baby steps with all things.

Her curious expression was soon turned on me. "'Alice in Chains?' Does... Does it mean anything? Some of it sounds... familiar, but... my spell can't place it." Or maybe she couldn't translate it.

"Uhh..." Worry made my answer a bit shaky. "Their name refers to a person named Alice who is either chained up, or has chains... attached to her."

She grimaced, but otherwise seemed okay. "I see... As a proper name... your meaning was mixed. Does 'Deftones' mean anything?"

"I don't actually know, but it might. I never bothered to check." A thought occured to me. "Wait, if your translation spell has trouble with proper names, then earlier today how did you know that we call Princess Celestia 'Celestia?'"

Her chin dropped and she blinked a few times, her eyes flicking from side to side as she considered that. She lifted her head to peer up at me. "The better question... is how do you know her name? 'Celestia' is Equestrian. In... old Equestrian her name was 'Caelistianya.' Literally... 'Mistress of the Sun,' but it... has simplified over the years."

It was stupid, but I couldn't help myself. "Ah. So does that mean your name would be 'Etherianya?'"

"'Aetheristianya' actually." She explained with forced patience. "The pronunciation of my given name would be a little different. 'Almernya' might actually be a more appropriate suffix since it means 'daughter of,' and was commonly an expression for a special talent didn't require such direct control - I don't control ponies' dreams the way Princess Celestia controls the Sun." She glowered at me to emphasize her next words. "But I very much prefer Pr... simply 'Etherea.'"

I nodded slowly as I tried to puzzle out why she'd backtracked on her title like that. At least the etymology was easy enough to understand, though it didn't help me much. It seemed like every time I got an answer I immediately thought of at least two more questions to ask.

I ended up going with the one that had already been on my mind. "Okay, then what about Princess Luna? 'Luna' is Latin, which was the language of the Romans and was their name for our moon. That word has been around for well over two thousand years. 'Celestia' is also so similar to words like 'celestial' that they might as well be the same. Even 'Equestria' is pretty much a play on a modern English word. Are they similar in Equestrian?"

"Well, Princess Luna's name was 'Ilunaelistianya.' It still... bears a resemblance. I guess. As for... the similarities in our languages... " Etherea shifted back a bit and lifted a hoof. She paused to stare blankly at nothing. Her hoof decided to complete the gesture for her, finally rising to rub harshly at the bridge of her muzzle. "They are there, but I really have no idea. I am not... Ugh! I do not even know if there... is anypony I might be able to ask about this."

The conversation kept expanding and I was feeling more than a little awkward standing just outside Craig's open door. I was about to suggest that we move our little Hallway Get-together to someplace that allowed for more sitting when Etherea made a face like she'd eaten something sour. She tried to peer around me again. "Is all of your music this... angry-sounding?"

It took a moment to identify the current song as something by either Seether or Staind - it was sometimes for me to hard to tell the difference. "No," I shook my head, "but much of this station's selection is. Even then there is still plenty of variation. Many are angry, as you put it, but some are happy, sad, silly... All kinds of things."

She thought about that. "Then... I would not mind hearing... more."

She made as if to brush past me before catching herself with a hoof off the floor. Her ears folded again and she backed a couple steps down the hall. I thought I caught a hint of fear before her expression flipped to overly neutral. She wanted a better vantage point - whether to listen or gawk I didn't know - but she was still very uncomfortable with me which was a bit upsetting.

I took the initiative and moved to stand just inside the living area but Etherea still made sure that I was well aside before making her way forward. She stopped a ways back from the doorway, stretching her neck out to cover the remaining distance and peek around the frame. I was only a couple of feet away and about even with her cutie mark actually, but I resolutely looked anywhere but directly at her. I badly wanted to take in her every detail, but that desire felt very wrong.

Unfortunately that meant neither of us was really paying attention. The sensation of feathers gently brushing my shirt and right forearm instantly snapped every iota of my attention down to my front. The leading edge of Etherea's primaries were pressing against me! In my shocked absence of thought I couldn't help but turn my hand over to feel the underside of her wing. Though still laden with dampness her feathers were soft like smooth velvet.

Something was very wrong. She wouldn't knowingly do this... Would she? Of course not. I wrenched my attention from the wing I was basically holding. She was leaning forward to look around the doorframe and had apparently spread her wings for balance.

Having noticed something off with her wing, she turned to look my way right then and her reaction was completely understandable: on seeing me touching her wing, and feeling my hand resting against the underside, she jerked it back and leapt away. Her gasp became a hiss through her teeth as she crashed against the wall. This was very bad! I backpedaled as fast as I could.

"Sorry!" I tried preempting the oncoming tirade. "Sorry! I'll just stand over here now." I stopped in the middle of the living area and shoved my hands in my pockets.

Etherea leaned against the wall, her sides heaving and her muzzle twisted in a grimace. She didn't say a thing until after carefully regaining her balance and giving both wings a quick checkup. Her eyes bored in to mine accusingly, her expression seething.

"What... what on Equestria... were you DOING?! D-don't you dare touch me!"

What was I doing? Not a damned thing. "Hey. I was just standing there, minding my..." Her frown deepened to reveal a thin line of white between quivering lips.

"Are you... saying it was my fault?"

No princess, I'm saying it was all the fault of a magic spaghetti monster. Of course it was your fault! I'm not so stupid as to try copping a feel on an irate Alicorn who's probably more than capable of drop-kicking my happy ass clear out to my car... I kept my jaw firmly clenched to prevent myself from saying that though. Antagonizing her further would be monumentally stupid.

So we just stared at each other. A familiar hammering in my ears that told me just how scared I was, but I was stuck in place. I refused to cave and commit to a lie; I really had been minding my own business. But at the same time I knew I hadn't reacted as well as I should, and that turning my hand over to feel her feathers had been a mistake.

I looked away first - prolonged staring always made me uncomfortable.

"You just go do whatever the fff..." No, Alex. Just no. "...whatever you want." I turned to go do something else - anything else - though I wasn't sure what. "I'll just - I dunno' - sit in a corner where I can't possibly get myself killed by an angry pony princess."

Less than two steps later a surprisingly quiet mezzo-soprano voice spoke up behind me. "Shut up. You're an idiot." The words of the 'safety phrase,' which should have been a harsh admonition, were so at odds with her soft tone that I couldn't help but glance at Etherea incredulously out of the corner of my eyes. Her ears were still folded, but her head was angled faintly down and away from me. "Did you mean to?"

"No." I left it at that. She eventually looked up at me, her eyes searching intently for something.

"I am... am sorry." She sighed. "You have been... remarkably considerate, and... I understand you were surprised. I was... not careful. Just please... do not touch me. Okay?" It was clearly an effort for her to say all that steadily and calmly. But a certain hopefulness had replaced her anger as she finished.

I turned back. "Thanks."

The time it took for her to flip her ears back and forth as she switched to a confused stare was very helpful in collecting and disposing of my frustrations.

"For?" she prodded.

I let a wry grin cross my face. "For telling me to stop before things got out of hand. Too out of hand... I think we both needed that. And I promise not to touch you unless you allow it."

"Why would you...?" She lifted her head to protest before biting her own words off. A forehoof rose to hover just beside the forelock - or was it bangs? - covering her wounds. "Oh..."

As one we turned in surprise as a semi-conscious grumble emanated from Craig's room. When nothing more seemed forthcoming I figured that he must have slipped back in to dreamland, though Etherea was in a better position to know. She blushed, her face once again shifting toward orange. She listened, her ears twitching periodically, before leaning out of sight through Craig's door.

"Wait..." I began even as I heard her pull the door shut.

She stepped back. "I feel better giving... him his privacy. Should I not have done that?"

"No, that's fine, I guess. If he cared about privacy then he would have shut it himself. I just don't know if he's ever washed the doorknob..." And I knew what he did in that room nearly every weekend. "You might..."

Etherea vanished back in to the bathroom before I registered that she was moving. Near silently too, somehow. I made yet another mental note; this time to expand last night's cleaning efforts to include everything she might want to grasp, turn, or open. I was running out of mental space for all of them and really needed to invest in a notepad or something.

As Etherea ran the faucet I moved into the hall and down past the bathroom door to wait on the other side. A quick glance in to the small room showed that while there were still some spots of water, Etherea had managed to clean up the place pretty well. She was again stretched over the counter and I found my eyes wandering toward her. My gut twisted as I realized what I was doing and I moved out of sight and stared at the wall. It was such an important shade of off white.

I also kept my expression carefully neutral as she exited. She gave me a cold stare that dared me to make fun of what had just happened, but there was no way in hell I would risk it.

"You will clean all of the handles here." She stated, standing regally with her chin raised so that she could look down her muzzle at me. Surprisingly the effect wasn't lessened at all by being more than a head shorter than I. Her horn probably had something to do with it. "Anything I might want to... open, lift, move, hold, twist, or... well, I want you to make each and every one... sanitary."

"That's already on the list. I just need some time." She was fortunate that I already had every intention of doing what she wanted. She'd better appreciate it.

She held her pose for a bit before nodding shallowly. I seemed to have convinced her that I was actually going to do what I said I was. With a flick of her wings she twirled about and sauntered back to the living area. Or twirled as much as the hall allowed - which wasn't much. She did saunter though. I was in the perfect position to enjoy the sight of her haunches flexing as she strode away on those long, lean legs of hers. And to feel incredibly disturbed for doing so.

I grabbed the first aid kit and a cup of water before trailing behind her in to the living area. She had moved off to the right, placing herself closer to the front door and safely away from any direct sunlight. I had to fight against both grinning stupidly and sighing at her as I moved over to the couch. She was being foolish, though I wasn't actually going to say so. Unfortunately for her the sun switches from the living area windows to the bedroom ones later in the day, so if she wanted to claim my room again tonight then she'd need to get over her fear of it soon.

To that end I patted the floor near me with a foot. Directly in the sunlight. She had been watching me, a certain wariness still lingering in her features, and the gesture with my foot was clear. Her eyes met mine and she frowned as she settled to her haunches. We stared at each other for a moment, but again I looked away first.

"It's not going to hurt you." I pointedly looked up toward the window. Her nose was low but her eyes were up and watching the window when I turned back. Her folded ears signaled her continuing insecurity.

"See, it's not hurting me." I continued, taking a step forward. "It's not like our Sun is going to suddenly turn dangerous."

"You have no... princesses, so how can you... know that?"

My eyes twitched in surprise. I just know, alright? But that wouldn't be good enough for her. I scrunched my forehead as I assembled a better response.

"Newton's first Law." I explained after a moment. "Objects keep doing what they're doing unless something else stops them from doing it. Our Sun is a massive, powerful object and things capable of making drastic changes to it don't pop up without warning. The universe just doesn't work that way. Us humans wouldn't be here if it wasn't consistent."

"That sounds like..." She blinked and cocked her head. "Neya lyar shi efrirn celisethelay su ortuso?" And surprise Equestrian! Now she'd lost me. "Star. Circle? Veh, lon'svoar non laerusha ne koiren. It is like... 'spiral,' but... Um. Swirl! Starswirl!" She thumped a hoof against the carpet as a smile flared to life.

"That sounds like one of Starswirl's fundamentals." She finished with a happy nod.

It took a second for my brain to catch up with her. "There you go," I grinned at her, "our worlds aren't so different after all. Just because there isn't someone consciously directing it doesn't mean that it works much differently. It didn't hurt you earlier, did it?"

I mentally kicked myself as Etherea's smile faded. Damnit! I hadn't wanted to bring up this morning's... episode. I resolutely kept quiet to spare the both of us further embarrassment, and she spent the next minute looking down at the floor. Eventually she swallowed, took a deep breath, and slowly slid her left forehoof into a sunbeam. For a while neither of us moved. I wasn't about to distract her from finding out that she would be okay.

"It's warm."

I couldn't stop myself from laughing. It wasn't long, or derisive, but I still got a dirty look.

"It's not funny!" she protested.

"It kind of is. It's just sunlight." We were in the midst of a diplomatic nightmare with two entire peoples possibly turning their unhappy attentions to us. There was a whole host of potential biologic, societal, and magical difficulties looming, but sunlight scared the crap out of her? It was fucking hilarious.

Her cheeks flapped as she harrumphed at me. "But it is not! You told... me that your Sun is a giant uncontrolled... continuous explosion! That... does not sound very safe to me! Ours is a... stable Harmonic font... watched over by one of the most... Harmoniously-gifted ponies to ever live. Its cycles... trajectories, output, appearance... and variances are well-regulated by Celestia herself! I trust it because I trust her. Yours..." She paused to flail a hoof before her as she struggled to find the right words.

"Yours is the center... of a delicate and overly complex system... of happenstances over which nopony has any... control, and which, if it were to fail, would kill everypony. Right? What happens if something... goes horribly wrong with your Sun?"

"Well..." To sugar-coat or not, that is the question... "I guess then we would all die."

"See!" she practically exploded, her previously-flailing hoof swinging out to the side while her wings fluttered, "That's what I mean! How can you... not be afraid of that?"

"To be fair, our solar system is well-regulated..."

"How?! Without Harmony there is nopony... who could possibly exert that kind of control!" I was reminded that I really needed to ask about the intricacies of Harmony and magic. And also that she had some interesting preconceptions about my reality. Well, from my perspective they were interesting since I was in a much better position to appreciate her inexperience.

"You're right, and you're wrong." I cringed inwardly as she gaped at me. I doubted she often had anyone telling her that so bluntly. It was probably the worst way I could have gotten her attention, but I was running out of patience and there were much more important things to be doing than arguing about the relative danger of sunlight. "The system is well-regulated by itself. The forces being exerted by any given thing are counteracted by the forces opposed to it. The Sun doesn't explode because its own gravity is just the right strength to hold it together. The Earth remains in a stable orbit because the gravitational pull on it matches the momentum that would otherwise fling it away. If there were variation enough in the system to end our existence, then it would already have happened and we wouldn't be here to have this conversation!"

"But what if..."

I held up a hand to stall a further go around in this topic. I was having trouble believing I had spoken all of that so eloquently and without somehow pissing her off. I guess I was slipping in to a 'whipped dog syndrome' and now expected that whatever I said would upset her.

"Look," I really wanted to just finish this conversation despite my reservations about telling her she'd been wrong, "like I said earlier. The system is so well-balanced that it would take something unimaginably powerful to disrupt drastically in my lifetime. I'd be very surprised if even Princess Celestia herself has the ability to do so." Etherea did a blink/twitch with her entire body as I said that. She'd probably forgotten that I knew something of Equestria. "Anything that could do so was either wiped out in the formation of our world or included in to the system. You'll have to trust me on this, but our world is so consistent - all on its own - that calendars from thousands of years ago are still accurate."

Twilight Sparkle would have a field day with Stonehenge. Probably a field-life. Assuming, of course, that she survived the initial explosion of excitement from learning that my world existed.

"And see, it's not so bad." I point at her other forehoof which had yet to move out of the sunbeam. "It's just light."

Etherea's head snapped down as she stared at the offending hoof. I couldn't read her face from this angle, but it underwent a quick series of contortions. As her expression gradually came to a semblance of permanency she lifted her hoof out of the little patch of light, inspected the carpet, and then slowly put her hoof back. A moment later she looked up at me through her eyelashes.

"It's warm." There was a soft reverence in her voice.

It was so unbelievably adorable - she with one leg cautiously extended in to a spot of light, her now-upright ears pointed at her hoof, and her large eyes round with wonder. I wanted to grin like an idiot at her child-like fascination. I wanted to laugh at her affirmation that sunlight was indeed warm. But I also didn't really want risk seeming like I was making fun of her so I confined myself to an amused snort which I hid behind a fist.

"If you're feeling braver, then how about I take a look at your forehead."

Her chin rose slowly and she tilted her head to examine me curiously. "Er... Are you certain... that you meant to say it that way?"

"Like...?" Like I'd just questioned her bravery? Goddamnit, I hadn't meant it to come out that way and now I felt like an idiot. Well, that feeling had been sticking around quite a lot, but even so I normally got longer breaks. I dug the fingertips of my right hand in to my temples. "Ugh... No."

"I thought so." She dipped her head once. "I suppose I... can forgive you. Try not to make a habit of it though."

Her voice was even but I thought I caught a faint curling at the corners of her mouth. I wasn't sure what to make of it. I liked the idea that she was keeping a sense of humor through all of this yet I worried that it wouldn't last. Apologizing so often was becoming annoying and, despite the sincerity of my feelings, there might be a point where it all started sounding hollow to her.

I sat heavily on the couch, relishing the feel of something that wouldn't judge me. Also it was just damned comfy. Etherea watched from across the room and it was disappointing to see her smile gone so quickly.

As I shifted to ensure that the couch didn't in fact swallow me whole Etherea got to her hooves, fixed her eyes on a point over my shoulder, and took a deep breath. To see the cracks in her stoicism as she trekked across the room - her stiff gait, resolute stare, and ears that had again dropped to the back of her head - it seemed a long and harrowing journey. Compared to her I had practically traipsed my way to the couch.

I found a whole new perspective on her when she finally halted before me. Being just under five feet tall meant that she was normally quite a bit shorter than I, but with me sitting she practically towered over me. This was my first good look at the underside of her chin and I felt a very interesting sense of 'weird' as she swallowed and I got to watch it run the entirety of her very long throat.

There was a long moment of me trying not to shift uncomfortably before she forced her eyes off the window and looked down at me. She smiled hesitantly but it died a quick death. Her expression once again blanked and she raised her muzzle in to the air as she turned to her right - thankfully not clipping me with her wing - briefly presenting her profile before she sat.

There was still a problem. I hadn't considered that ponies sitting meant they just planted their butts on the floor. Her front, while propped up on her forelegs, didn't lower at all. With both of us sitting she was a good head and a half or so taller than I.

"Um. You may... need to lie down."

She grunted faintly before settling on to her stomach, her eyes never straying from their intense stare down with something in the kitchen.

It took a little time to bolster my courage even with her resting comfortably on the floor. For one, I was doing a checkup on a pony. One who wasn't in the best of moods. One I was fighting to keep my eyes off of. The more foolish part of me dreaded that she would be able to pick up on my feelings while sitting so close to me, and unfortunately that part was being quite vocal. I had to make sure that everything about me was strictly professional.

The other part of it was that I didn't know that I wanted to see Etherea's injury. All sorts of things could have happened with it and I feared the worst. She was the first pony - as far as I knew - to come to my Earth, and the possibility that some sort of bacteria would start eating her alive still scared the crap out of me. I found a mantra looping inside my head: please be okay, please be okay...

"Okay?" I managed to eke out for her benefit. She nodded again.

I leaned forward to cup one hand under the cascade of hair covering her forehead. Slipping the fingers of my other hand through her mane further down let me flip it over the back of her neck without mussing it up too much. Even weighed down with water it amazingly held the parallel waves that ran from front to back. I had yet to figure out just how careful Etherea was about her appearance, but as a princess I felt better erring on the side of 'a lot.'

Pink, red, and a little purple greeted me from below and just forward of her ear, but nothing that seemed horribly out of place or spoke of infection. She was bleeding a bit and a thin red rivulet was slowly meandering its way through her fur. I wondered why she hadn't noticed it though, with the rest her fur still a bit damp, she might not be able to tell.

All things considered, it wasn't too bad and I sighed in relief with a breath I hadn't realized I was holding.

It was about then that I began noticing a very peculiar sense filtering into my nose. She smelled of... I carefully inhaled. Lilacs. Great... I liked the smell of lilacs. And since I had bought her shampoo that made it my fault that I liked the way she smelled. I liked how she looked and now I liked how she smelled. I wasn't doing myself any favors.

She twitched when I sighed again - her first real reaction since laying before me. "What is it?"

Crap. I forced myself to focus on what I was supposed to be doing.

"You're bleeding a bit but everything looks healthy otherwise, so that's good. Not too badly, but it is getting in your fur." Her eye flicked my way before resuming its forward facing. A faint grimace crept into the edges of her muzzle. "Didn't you notice it in the shower?"

"Maybe a little. I was... occupied." She grumped.

Fine, I won't ask. I suppose that without magic it had been difficult for her to take a shower. No Alex, don't think too much about that either.

Instead I focused on the injury before me, snipping a piece of gauze from the first aid kit, moistening it in the cup of water, and dabbing ever-so-lightly around the main gash. She winced every now and again, stealing glances my way each time, and I apologized for every disruption. I tried my hardest to keep my touch light. It worked to an extent, her forehead was getting clean with a minimum of pain, but that was because I was avoiding the real problem.

And apparently she'd noticed. "Ugh! Stop wasting time. I'm not so... fragile that I cannot take a little pain."

She turned to glower at me from barely two feet away. 'Purple' was certainly accurate for her eyes, even if it didn't really do them justice. A hundred different shades from royal violet to pale lavender mixed in subtle patterns that invariably drew my attention inward. Sorry red, but I think purple is my new favorite color.

We stared uncomfortably in to each other's eyes, though I was sure for very different reasons. What was I doing? Oh right.

Apologizing. "Sorry. Just trying to be gentle. It's probably going to hurt a lot, and there's still some dried stuff in your fur that I was going to try and get out."

We held our places. I was about to look away again when she did instead - turning the side of her head back to me. Her neck was straight and her chin high, but I caught her forelegs shuffling a little.

"Well, please warn me first." Her voice was level but she seemed tense.

I nodded though she couldn't see it. There really were some bits of dried blood still latched to her temple that the gauze had failed to remove. I was resolved to get them for some reason, and that probably meant using my fingers. I lifted my hand, then hesitated; I hoped she wouldn't mind.

She jerked as my fingers pressed directly against her, the fur around them suddenly standing on end. Her visible eye sought me out again as it narrowed, but she otherwise remained still. That she was going to trust me was relieving. My second hand joined the first and I used my nails to pinch against a particle of reddish-brown glued to the short hairs. A shiver ran from Etherea's cheek down her neck as I pulled it free.

I repeated the process again and again, and her shivers got worse and worse. Perturbed, I stopped what I was doing. "Are you okay?"

From this close I could see the underlying bloom of pink that again shifted her color faintly toward orange. "It tickles." The sudden cut off at the end left no question that the subject should be dropped.

So we lapsed back in to resolute silence. I wanted to talk to her; to say something that would further put her at ease around me. As I picked her fur clean, and occasionally dabbed at the blood oozing from her wound, I started spending as much time trying to think of something to say as I did actually cleaning her.

"So, what made you think I was a girl?" The words spilled out of my mouth just in time to vacate the space for my foot. My cheeks immediately began burning and I slapped a hand to my forehead. "Goddamnit. Never mind. Don't mind me. Shutting up now."

I was never going to speak again if I could help it.

When I dared look at Etherea again I did not find an angry alicorn ready to clock me upside the head for calling attention back to another embarrassing moment. She was still staring forward, but her eyes were wider and her shoulders and wings hunched protectively as though she was expecting me to hit her. Was that it? She was scared of me too? Of course she was. And if that was the case...

"Please don't worry about it too much. I occasionally get it from other humans as well, so I'm not mad." I explained gently. She spared me a glance and I tried to smile reassuringly back.

"Really?" I nodded at her. "Other humans can not... tell that you are male?"

"Sometimes from the back. It's the long hair actually. If I grew a beard it would be easier to tell, but I've never actually wanted one." I offered, trying to sound upbeat for her benefit.

"You also have..." she began strong," fuller lips than... Craig. And I thought... um..." and finished with a whisper. Embarrassment was apparently the name of the game, and she was feeling it keenly.

That was a bit... emasculating. "Er... yeah. I guess I do. That would be from my Mom." Time to switch it up a bit - finish strong. Like a man! "I actually thank her for that. I couldn't have played trombone and baritone in band nearly as well as I did... otherwise."

Etherea's shoulders gradually slid back to a more relaxed posture, but the lines of her neck and back were still tight. Her ears couldn't decide where they wanted to stay, like she was unsure of what she was thinking about. I waited patiently for her while planning the rest of my fur-cleaning duties; now not quite sure I wanted to continue this conversation.

"So... do both human genders nurse their young?"

For a moment I couldn't breathe; the only sound I could make was a strangled sort of snort as I fought to dismiss the image of me trying to breast feed a baby. I guess seeing my nipples had really thrown her off. Etherea's ears shot up then flopped immediately back down as she went right back to cringing defensively!

"N-nnn... N-n-no..." I finally managed while fighting back chuckles. It took some doing but I managed to swallow that lump that preceded full blown laughter. "T-trust me. You would be... be able to tell a human woman from a man."

There was another pause as Etherea thought. She shifted away, rolling slightly so that it was easier to twist her neck to look at me. Hesitantly but with a completely innocent face she asked, "How?"

"Uhhhh..." A brilliant answer, to be sure. "Well... Y'see... Guys are flatter in the chest. Girls' breasts are always there and... um... would probably seem permanently engorged to you." And I was blushing again.

She blinked, her eyes wandering around randomly without ever coming back to me. "Oh."

Carefully, as though she were afraid she might break something, she rolled back to fully upright, her face returning to an impassive mask as her eyes fixed again on the kitchen. Even so, her ears and the set of her neck betrayed her continued unease. All I'd managed to do was make both of us feel awkward. At least it was better than being at each other's throats.

I eventually went back to picking her fur clean. The silence stretched uncomfortably again but I wasn't dumb enough to break it this time. Every conversation idea I thought of was quickly fed to a mental wood chipper just in case.

When the fur around the main wound was free of any lingering traces of previous bleeding I was confronted by something I had been avoiding. I was going to have to bandage her but this time she would be awake for it. I gazed at the angry slice marring her forehead in dismay. It wasn't pulsing, growing, or oozing something unholy, but that didn't stop my mind from conjuring up images that would justify my nervousness. Still, it couldn't be helped. I had to do this.

"Etherea," I began gently, "I'm going to put a new bandage on now."

Her whole body immediately locked up. I think even her tail was clamped firmly against her butt, though I was definitely not paying any attention. She eventually gave a strained, jerky nod.

I retrieved a pad, dropped a little antiseptic on it, and quickly set it against her. Her hooves dug in to the carpet. A sharp hissing inhale became a high pitched whine forcing its way out of her. As that faded away she began breathing in a series of short, rapid heaves. These slowly petered out as I simply held myself still. It was no worse than I thought she might react, but better than I expected - no flailing limbs or screaming was a plus.

Assured that she was (relatively) fine, I wrapped another length of gauze around her head to hold the pad in place. The last thing to do was to flip her mane back in to place, covering the bandage under a safe wall of blue hair. By the time I leaned back she was more or less composed.

"Ow." Etherea's reaction was so simple, but I couldn't help smiling in understanding.

"I can imagine."

She gustily exhaled before getting to her hooves. A quick shake of each hoof - one at a time - got her legs sorted out. She still backed away from me rather than simply turning around, but other than a quick once over she paid me no mind.

After another sigh and a shake - thank God it wasn't the water-flinging kind - she looked back at me. "Thank you."

I guess I could accept that. I nodded my acceptance but she was already moving toward the assorted objects spread out on the carpet. She stopped and stood silently over them, a forehoof venturing forth to rest on one of the brushes while she looked down as though trying to divine its mysteries. Her face remained blank, but gradually her hoof began tilting the brush back and forth. This was new and unusual, and I remained where I sat to find out just what she was doing.

Suddenly her hoof jerked upward before smashing in to the carpet. I swear the brush bounced. I leapt to my feet even as she flopped on the floor, which left me really confused. I was about to ask her just what the hell was going on when she put a hoof over her face and let out a long rising groan.

"I give UP!" Her frustrated shout silenced me as surely as any hand. Or hoof. A familiar yellow halo sprang up around her horn and a pair of brushes and a curry comb jumped in to the air. The four competing sources of illumination resulted in faint shadows that faded in and out as they scampered about the area.

I was suddenly interested in the three levitating objects that swooped in to attack her mane, tail, and the exposed fur of her neck, and why she was suddenly using so much magic. Oh, and the grim set to her jaw and flaring nostrils. It seriously looked like she was trying to bite through her own teeth.

"Are... you okay?" I asked slowly.

"Does it look like I am fine?" she spat back without unclenching her teeth.

"Uhh... no. And that's what worries me."

She sucked in a deep breath. A quick twist of her neck centered her narrowed eyes on mine, forcing me to step backwards and causing my calves to bump against the couch. "None of... these items are designed for ponies. Not one! I cannot hold them properly and where... does that leave me? I am not... having you groom me." Ouch... But definitely for the best. "So... I have to use magic to do the most mundane... things. And it hurts like... you would not believe!" The various satellites tending to her appearance did not stop in their ministrations but she broke her tirade to shudder.

"You know what is even worse?" Of course I didn't, but she didn't give me a chance to say so. "This world... completely lacks background Harmony, and apparently that means... I have to infuse my own in to... whatever I want to use magic on. This brush," one floated by in front of her face, "acts like it weighs... at least twice what it probably does. I can... feel it leeching more from me than it should. It is not a problem now, when it is just... a couple small objects, but how much... will this added drain... affect my recovery? Will I be stuck... here for more hours just from brushing my hair? Days?! What if I have... to use a really difficult spell?!"

A less painful-looking pause interrupted as she took a breath. "And if I use magic now, why should I not... use it for other things as well? Eating would be so much easier! Washing, doors..." she flinched distastefully, "the translation spell, even... the simple, normally unconscious things that come... naturally to ponies! A pegasus'... inherent grace... is actually some tiny amount of magic; I didn't know that! I can feel it now! I should not... ever have to worry about how much Harmony walking uses! I bet holding things... takes it as well! But now I... I..." Her muzzle tilted down toward the floor as she looked away. "Never mind."

I waited to see if there was more or whether I could come up with something to make her feel better, but I utterly failed and she continued to ignore me. Apparently that was it. I didn't particularly like it, but at the same time I was pretty sure I understood. There were times when it was just best to be left alone. She needed a moment and after that rant I was willing to give it to her.

With nothing better to do I set about cleaning up. It only took a minute or so to put everything back in its place and to dispose what had been used. I wasn't quite sure whether I should throw away the old bandage or to keep it somewhere safe. There were people who would love to study it, and the thought that it might be necessary for someone to do so crossed my mind. Keeping it would probably creep Etherea out horribly, but it might be considered a biohazard so tossing it was probably a Federal crime of some kind. In the end I at least pretended to do the right thing and stuck the bandage in a baggy on the off chance it might save my life.

"I'm sorry," greeted me when I reentered the living area. My foot froze halfway through stepping and nearly pitched me forward. What? "I... did not mean to take that out on you."

Equally surprising was the sight of Etherea resting on the floor with my poster unrolled before her, the combs and brushes still working to put her appearance in order. Joining them was the pink towel which was slowly working its way along both sides of a wing. As if I needed more proof that alicorns were overpowered. At least she sounded less pained.

"It's fine." The reversal of our earlier positions wasn't lost on me. Hopefully she also caught it. "You've had a rough day and aren't catching many breaks. I understand. If you need some time..."

Though genuine my attempt to empathize felt flimsy, but she nodded gratefully anyways.

"No. I will be alright." She sighed, her head dipping lower. "I feel like... such a foal." Equestrians seriously used that term?! "We keep going around and around, trading who snaps... at whom and not... getting anywhere. I was... raised better than that. I was taught better than that. I should be better than that! And here I am pushing back at... the people... who are trying to help."

It was like she was reading my own thoughts on the matter. "I... well I actually feel better seeing you like this." She didn't quite look at me, but her eyes shifted my way as she pursed her lips. Yeah, I know that didn't come out quite right. "What I mean is that instantly accepting all this might be nice, but I'd be really worried if you weren't at least... as stressed out as I am. I guess."

"Heh." Her violet irises finally focused on me as a tiny smile flickered at the corners of her mouth. We weren't friends by a long shot, but I think we had reached an accord of sorts.

While I was enjoying the markedly less anxious atmosphere I noticed one of her hooves caressing a corner of the poster on the ground. Even if she wasn't paying attention to it, the cartoon representation of Equestria was clearly still in her thoughts, and I brought her attention to it with a nod.

"So what do you think?"

"What do I think?" She had to mull that one over. "I... do not know what to think. To see them like this... is so strange."

"As cartoon characters?" I ventured.

"No. Well... Yes. We have animated shows in Equestria as well, but this... I don't know how... this poster can exist. I don't know if anypony at home... has any idea that entire other worlds might, well, do exist... beyond Equestria, and yet here you already have a window in to ours. Everything I... know tells me that this is impossible!"

"And yet here I am, and I would... recognize Princess Celestia with Terrialestril anywhere," She tapped the white cartoon alicorn with her hoof. Also, what?! "even if they are... highly stylized." Her head tilted left as she considered the colorful print under her hooves. "I've never seen her... like this, but I guess this is Princess Luna, even if she looks like a filly. The one in the very front is clearly Lady Velroa Noisar, so these must... be the Element bearers - Ensul Shensoar, Dyelusena, Minelles, Laeilethrun, and Lady Aserelsi."

I blinked in utter confusion as she pointed out each pony. She'd just pointed at the "Mane Six" but spoken in... Equestrian? Of course their names were in Equestrian! I don't know why I half-expected her to randomly pull the characters' English names out of thin air.

Before I could interrupt and ask for clarification she singled out a fuchsia pony. "This looks like the Prime Minister of Education, Lady Wenelloen." She giggled briefly before cutting off with a wince. "Oh stars! That must... be Lady Tes next to her. She would probably laugh to see this... but Lady Aserelsi would throw a fit to find... such a juvenile," she drew out that word with a stiff, affected accent, "depiction of her sister."

I was thrilled beyond belief that she knew of several characters from the show. Make that several of 'the ponies who actually did the things the show was based off of.' The possibility of direct, factual information about them was... the feeling was completely beyond words. Now I knew why so many fans use the word 'squee' in this kind of situation, because it was what I felt like doing. But I was also so very lost.

"Um, what?" Etherea's head jerked up and she blinked at me, her ears flattening. "I-I'm sorry, but would you mind slowing those names down? I know them, um, differently."

She quickly glanced back and forth between me and the poster on the ground. "Oh... Right, you would... not know their real... names, would you?"

I shook my head and hesitantly lifted a hand toward the poster and her. She shifted slightly away from the appendage but nodded that it was fine for me to continue. At least it was something positive to be allowed to approach her.

"Princess Celestia and Philomena," I tapped the respective characters with a finger, "Princess Luna..."

"Philomena," the name crossed her lips like a question, "is Terrialestril."

"Ter-rial-estril?" She hesitated before bobbing her head once in agreement. "Hmmmm... Okay. Well this one here is Twilight Sparkle..."

"Lady Velroa Naois."

"Lady Twilight Sparkle, I guess." Another nod from my Alicorn guest. "Applejack..."

"Minelles."

"...Fluttershy..."

"Laeilethrun."

"...Pinkie Pie..." That got a massive blink out of her. I guess it sounded strange after translation or something.

"Dyelusena."

"...Rainbow Dash..."

"Ensul Shensoar."

"...and I'm guessing Lady Rarity?"

"Yes, she... would be Lady Aserelsi."

I pursed my lips while tilting my head. I'd definitely need a refresher on all of those. Probably more than one. "And the others you mentioned...?"

"Lady Tes is Lady Aserelsi's younger... sister and I believe Lady Wenelloen was Lady Tes's instructor from when she was younger."

"Ah." It was all making sense. Quite a few things from the show were strangely accurate about the real Equestria. "We know them as Sweetie Belle - that's Rarity's sister - and Cheerilee."

We lapsed in to silence, both content to sit and let each other absorb what the other had just pointed out. I was definitely going to have to do something more in order to actually remember the Ponies' real names. Lady Velroa... Min-something... Lady Aserel... si? I was already losing them in my head to a jumble of indistinct foreign syllables.

"This scares me. To think of what you... may know of us and we have absolutely no idea you are watching." Her ears dipped a little. "I want to know more, but I... don't know if... I really want to." Etherea's beautiful violet eyes broke away from the poster to meet mine. Her ears were up again and she was looking intently at me, but each word hesitated before venturing from her mouth. "Am... can I see it?"

The sudden switch wasn't lost on me. Some part of Etherea wanted to know whether she was in Friendship is Magic. I'd be scared too. I imagined sharing her feelings if I were to learn that someone was secretly watching my every move and there was nothing I could do about it - fascinated but not quite sure I wanted to know the truth.

"Yeah. We can do that. We'll have to go to my room since all of my stuff is there. Plus Craig doesn't let me watch episodes on his TV - something about his sports channels objecting to cartoon ponies." I stepped to one side and motioned for her go on ahead of me. Besides, I needed to talk to someone before lunch turned into another fiasco.

Etherea watched me carefully for a moment before getting to her hooves, one eyebrow hovering most of the way up her forehead. The towel settled itself over her back and she tucked her wings into position with a shuffle and a nudge from the tip of her nose. A second bout of hesitation prompted me to back up another step and give her plenty of space to pass by. As she ventured left down the hall, a line of beautification supplies floating in her wake, I slipped to the right and through the door in to Craig's room. The sounds of radio commercials greeted me. How Craig could sleep through that I'll never know.

Craig was still sprawled front-down as I tiptoed my way around the various discarded items and over to his bed, but he was facing toward the large Metallica poster on his wall and away from me. This was too easy. I balled a fist and jabbed him in the side with my knuckles. He yelped like a dog whose tail had been stepped on, the wall making a hollow thump when he pitched himself in to it. My stupid grin was the polar opposite to his unhappy snarl.

"What the fuck, man!"

"Heh. That's what you get for sleeping instead of keeping an eye on Etherea." I retorted.

He shifted around so that I wasn't standing directly over him. "What do you want? She didn't want anything to do with me. Hanging around her just in case she might need something would've been boring as hell, man, and it might've just pissed her off!"

"Not the point. I don't care that you let her be," I jabbed a finger at him, "it actually turned out to be a good idea. But going back to sleep? C'mon! At least act like you give a shit. The idea was that you would be available and you weren't."

"Alright. Fine. The next time your phone drops a magical fairytale pony in our living room I'll be all over it." he said, sitting up and rubbing his side, "Since you're here defending her honor," oh, har har. I could tell where this conversation was returning to, "she must be okay now. She send you in here herself, or did you volunteer?" Yeah, his stupid grin was slowly reforming.

"Actually no, I did have something important." I lowered my voice. Fortunately Craig noticed and dropped his expression to something resembling attentive. "Look, she's an herbivore..."

Craig cocked his head and I recognized a very familiar look of (relatively) deep thought. "She smokes weed?"

"Goddamnit Craig." That was another few brain cells down. "No, she only eats plants. No meat. In fact, if she's anything like a horse, eating meat around her might be a very, very bad idea. And right now I'm not willing to put that idea to the test."

"So..." he prompted, clearly not getting what I was saying.

"So for the time being we're not eating meat in the apartment, okay?" My eyes bored in to his so he'd know just how serious I was. This was Craig however...

"Oh, fuck that! I'm not just going to give up meat..." he began as he moved to get up; like standing eye-to-eye would convince me to drop this.

It was too easy, even for me. "So you like your meat, huh? Can't beat it?"

He jerked to a halt, bent over with one leg stretched to the floor as he tried to get off the bed by scooting around me. His mouth shaped a dumbfounded 'O' as he stared at me for a second. I do have my moments. Craig came to realize this and a smile grew under his nose.

"I've had a little practice. I meant to ask you for some pointers, but then, it's been a long time since I needed to beat my own meat!" My face blanked. And Craig proved, once again, that he's better at banter than I.

"Anyways." Craig's smile became a fully-grown, shit-eating, pearly-white-flashing grin as I switched topics. "My point still stands," I hissed, "I don't want either of us eating meat in the apartment. Okay?"

"And I'm not giving up..."

"Craig! I'm not telling you to stop eating meat. Have it at work! Go out and grab a burger! Just not here until we can be sure that she's not going to freak out about it!" I had to think of an analogy that would really hit home for him. Maybe... "You know Darth Vader?"

"Darth... What?" He blinked and titled his head like there was water in his ear. "What does he have to do with ponies and meat? Is Vader like some pony-eating boogerman?"

"Boogeyman. And no..." I didn't need to drink, really, I could just hang around with Craig.
"What I mean is y'know how he can choke you to death by looking at you?"

"Yeah..."

"Etherea can do that..." I left that thought half-finished, knowing full well the implication. She could do that to us. Craig's wide eyes told me that he did too. I think I managed to also scare myself a little with that one.

"Oh. I'll move my bacon to the station's freezer. Twizted," that was another one of the station's DJs, "better not touch it. I'm not scared to commit a hate crime over some bacon."

"Okay. You're a pal, Craig. Thanks." I turned to go when a hand landed on my shoulder. I looked back to find a scruffy, unkempt, and very concerned roommate behind me.

"Hey. I thought I heard more shouting after you got back. How's she doing?" Craig spoke softly but earnestly. He might be a horrible womanizer, but he was also surprisingly caring. Sometimes.

"She's... better. She hurt herself pretty bad by coming here, but I think she's past wanting to kill us. You were right about giving her some personal time to calm down and get used to things. So thanks for that. We just don't want to set her off again, kay?"

Craig's smile jumped back in to place. "Yeah, sure. Any time. And good to hear she's doing better. Oh, if you need any more help getting a mare in your bed, just let me kn...!"

I shoved him hard enough to send him tumbling along his bed and off the short end, the covers being dragged along for the ride. His laughter chased me down the hall all the way to my room where I found Etherea stretched on my bed. Of course. Apparently I didn't need any help getting her... Never mind, not going there.

She was resting on her stomach with her hind hooves tucked under and her forehooves laid across my pillows. The wing nearest me was extended at her shoulder - I guess that's what it's called - to spread the feathers closest to her body. Her towel was floating against the underside of her wing while one of the short-bristled brushes gently ran the length of a feather. From the curve of her neck it seemed like she was looking down at her hooves though I couldn't see through the mass of vibrant blue mane hanging in the way. What I did know was that she didn't seem to be paying attention to the two levitated objects as they worked. Alicorns...

I'm not sure how long I stood just outside the door, but I was totally justified in doing so. For one she was a pony, and frankly that was fucking amazing. Two - she was apparently a pony princess, which was just a little bit intimidating. Especially considering what I was about to show her. Three - she was kind of pretty while shining faintly from her recent shower, and I wasn't certain I wanted to be so close to her just because of it. I took full advantage of the moment to bludgeon both my attraction and trepidation in to submission. It didn't actually help that much, but at least I was coolly collected on the outside. I hoped.

Her head swiveled as soon as I finally poked a toe across the threshold, her eyes seeking me out even as her ears dipped backward. Yeah, things still weren't quite hunky-dory. I inadvertently stopped what I was doing.

"What?" she asked after a moment.

With her mane moved to the side I could see her device resting on her forelegs - it's what she must have been looking at - and there was a small gold-haloed stylus hovering in the air over it. Between that, the towel, and the brush, it was like she was showing off."Er... I, uh... I was just... wondering where you had hidden your stuff." Which, while true, was the worst cover ever.

"Oh. Um... Under your mattress..." Her head dipping and ears folding more fully as she looked away. Well that answers that.

Though I did stare with furrowed brows as I tried to figure that one out. She had hidden her stuff in my room under my mattress. Then she had left them there to demand that I release her. If she had planned on leaving, then why had... It wasn't worth the headache it would give me.

My computer desk was situated against the same wall as the door but on the opposite end of the room, and I shrugged before continuing my trip to it. It faced both the door and my bed, and when I was in the chair the room's two windows were in the wall to my right. I called it the God Seat because it allowed me to see everything in the room, minimized glare on my computer screen, and I felt like I should be passing judgment on anyone entering through my door.

Dimble was sprawled in the corner under the chair which was surprising. But then, there was a pony occupying his normal daytime napping spot. I nudged him with a toe and he rolled on to his back, stretching out and baring everything at me - just in case I had any question.

"I see you've already fought Dimble for his bed and won." I looked over my monitor at Etherea. From there I could see that her torc and circlet were nestled in the covers between her and the wall. It also gave me a good view as the stylus tapped her device once before floating over to her torc and attaching to the inside face.

"Dimble's bed? But I... thought this was yours." I don't know how she said that with a straight face.

"No. I just rent it from him at night. Apparently he likes you though." Even I was surprised when that spilled out of my mouth and I cringed at my own snark.

Her mouth opened, her face still showing genuine confusion. The moment she finally caught on was easily apparent because her ears flapped forward then back. "Oh." was all she said, her narrowed eyes showing a complete lack of amusement.

I chuckled nervously - at least she wasn't yelling. Her stare prompted me to go back to setting up my computer, something that didn't take nearly long enough for my taste - I was feeling a very familiar tightness in my chest. Was I really about to show an episode of My Little Pony to an Equestrian pony? Yes, I was. Was the universe going to implode from this? It felt likely.

"I have no idea how... your technology can possibly work without magic, but I think... I can see why you humans would... thrive without it." I gave her the briefest of looks, wondering what she was talking about. She seemed to be avidly watching me work the mouse. "Pegasi... deftness tends to fall short when it comes to really fine manipulation. Earth Ponies have strength but unfortunately cannot match pegasi... for dexterity. Unicorn magic can provide both, but to... control that many points so quickly and... accurately is beyond most of us. It would take a team of ponies working together to do some of the things... you can probably do by yourself."

I lifted my hand off the mouse to examine it and Etherea followed the motion. She blinked, her eyes widening nearly imperceptibly, as I wiggled my fingers rhythmically. I guess hands really were something amazing.

"Okay, but you can do that." I said, pointing at the two items working their way along her wing without any sort of physical control. She lifted her wing a bit higher and looked back as though noticing the levitated items for the first time.

"It's just some levitation. Pretty much every... unicorn can hold a couple items this way." She sounded mystified. Of course she did. She got to live with magic every day of her life so it wasn't a big deal to her.

"If I want to grab something I have to get up and get it. You can just have it float across the room to you." I got up and turned my monitor around so that she could see it. The speakers were next. Etherea pulled her wing in closer as I rolled my chair around so that I could also watch. She didn't have to worry though; I left at least five feet of open space between us.

"But the kind of control you have... building or repairing things must be really easy. And writing... Oh, instruments! I can only... imagine the amazing music you must have developed." This was exciting her? But she had magic. She knew ponies who could move the Sun and Moon! All I had done was type on a keyboard.

"There's a lot more to those kinds of things than just having fingers. You need both the inclination - like a special talent - and generally some amount of practice. I bet most humans are no better at playing instruments than most ponies." Her head titled but her eyes bored in to mine like she was trying to figure out if I was lying. "Well, I'm good to go here, if you want me to start...?" I cocked my head while leaning over the desk in preparation of hitting 'play.' My heart was clutching tightly at the base of my throat again.

Her jaw worked a little, like she was trying to decide whether to say more, but instead her nose dipped in a shallow nod.

"So what is this about?" she asked as the computer screen drew her attention.

"It's the first two episodes. They cover the return of Nightmare Moon and are the probably best starting point."

"Who?"

"Nightmare Moon?" Right, that was a proper name. "Um, Luna's evil side? I guess?" I cringed. How close had the show and all the fanfiction been on making Nightmare Moon a facet of the real princess?

Etherea jerked and leaned away from me, her head whipping around hard enough for her mane to disrupt the brush tending her wing. "Sussirovenzora illunae! You know of... Sussirovenzora illunae?!" Her voice rose to an incredulous squeak at the end.

"I... do?" I hadn't meant it to sound like a question, but her nearly violent reaction had triggered my nerves. This whole 'showing her how I knew about Equestria' deal was sounding like a worse idea every minute. She was still on edge, and after her fainting spell I could only guess at her reaction to seeing actual animated versions of ponies she knew. What if some of them were her friends and she hated the way humans portrayed them? I chewed on the inside of my cheek at my growing anticipation for the worst.

"Was that her Equestrian name? Because we know her as Nightmare Moon."

"Yes... I..." Her wide eyes flicked back to my computer as the episode launched into the prelude, her head eventually trailing after. She stared aghast, barely blinking, as the scene transitioned to Twilight Sparkle reading the history of Nightmare Moon from a book. I hunched in my chair in silence with one leg bouncing nervously, not willing to risk upsetting Etherea any more than she probably was.

"What... what are they saying?" The sudden question, even quiet as it was, caused me to jump in my seat.

"Huh?" Smooth.

"They're not... living beings so my spell can't understand them. What are they saying?" Oh right.

"Oh! Um... Well, Twilight is griping about being sent to... to Ponyville because she thinks that Princess Celestia should be taking the, um, possible return of Nightmare Moon more seriously..." And so it began. The first episode played out with me commenting along so that Etherea could understand. My initial frayed sentences became more cohesive as I regained confidence that some universe-shaking calamity was not going to happen. Once again my pessimism had been proven foolish by stable reality, but that was actually a good feeling. I didn't really want to be right when it came to predicting apocalypses.

Etherea, for her part, watched the screen in rapt silence, the brushes and towel lying where they had been forgotten. I stole the occasional glance her way, finding an ever-present subtle straining in her muscles, like she was ready to jump out of the bed at any moment. Her expression remained resolutely still outside of the occasional blink. I was relieved to see her taking this so well.

She gasped at Nightmare Moon's arrival, but to my surprise it wasn't followed by greater shock, fear, anger, horror, or worse. Instead she snorted, then covered her muzzle with a hoof. That same hoof slowly dipped to hang limply before her, one eyebrow climbing and one descending as a look of abject disbelief overcame her. My voicing of Nightmare's lines only made Etherea have to fight harder to stay composed, and by the time the episode finished I was peering at her questioningly.

There was a short pause as the credits ran where she let her hoof settle back onto the covers before looking my way. The same incredulous expression remained, but she was fighting valiantly to smooth it over with careful composure.

"T-that was Sussirovenzora Illunae?" she managed to squeeze out.

I wondered what she was getting at before answering. "Yeah. Was she very different?"

Etherea's nod came slowly and timidly. "There are only a couple of... pictures of Princess Luna that way, but Sussirovenzora Illunae was a monstrous construct of... disharmonious magic. Though most ponies who saw her simply... called her color black, Lady Naois described her instead as... a ravenous absence of light - like she was consuming the light that struck her. Her mane and tail were similar to how they appear now, but apparently were... fractured... and flowed in reverse. Like her form... drew in and consumed them as well."

"Even her cutie mark was gone. Ponies... don't just lose their cutie mark!" Etherea was subdued as she talked, her hooves wandering in shallow circles where they pressed in to my pillows. "The only aspects of Luna that... remained were her eyes and teeth, though both were altered; her eyes were like those in the show - no longer remotely pony in their form or color - and she had fangs. Real fangs! She reportedly used them too..." Etherea shuddered and tucked her shoulders and haunches more completely behind the safety of her wings.

The personal reference to Luna had been quick, but I had still caught it. How well did she know Luna? I could feel a world full of Bronies screaming at me to ask about everyone's favorite princess, but I didn't dare interrupt Etherea at the moment.

"She..." A tremor ran its way from the tip of Etherea's nose, down her neck, along her back, and caused the base of her tail to twitch. "She was... did some horrible things..." She suddenly cut off.

A long silence lingered and eventually became uncomfortable - to me at least. It hurt to think that she was upset by a cartoon I loved, and despite my better judgment I wanted to alleviate that. "It's okay to... I mean, will you be alright? Nightmare Moon sounds terrifying..."

"I'm not scared!" I could tell by her resistance that she wasn't being entirely truthful. "I'm...! It's not that... I'm more angry than anything, okay?! It's like whoever made that was... making light of Sussirovenzora Illunae. I know Luna... would not be happy to see that, because that," she bobbed her nose in the direction of my computer, "was not Sussirovenzora Illunae. That was a storybook villain... that barely resembles the truth and is meant to appeal to foals. In fact, the entire show was clearly designed... for foals." Her violet eyes sought mine out, begging for an explanation.

"Well... yeah." I looked down and focused on the base of Etherea's throat, unwilling to meet those eyes. "The show was designed for six-year-old girls. It can't be all violent and scary. It's supposed to be warm and fuzzy."

"And... you like it?" Etherea dialed back the volume more even as her voice filled with wonder.

"Yeah. Quite a few humans do. It may be a bit childlike, but it's still pretty well done, has interesting characters, and has some good life lessons. I'm sorry if it's not entirely accurate, but is it at least accurate enough?"

I looked up for just an instant to see how she took that, being just a bit worried that I'd pushed too hard.

"I..." Her face was unreadable for a moment as she gazed through and past me. "No. Well, I don't know. What I've seen barely covers what Twi... Lady Naois," THAT was a very noticeable catch, "went through to get to where she was."

She drew in and let out a heavy breath. "Maybe I'm being too harsh. Sussirovenzora Illunae is gone, Princess Luna is back, and... Equestria is a better place for it. It feels wrong... to see her simplified this way, but you couldn't have known the real pony." We locked gazes again. "You... said there was more; maybe I should see the rest first. I'm sure Princess Celestia would... insist on it."

I gave a shrug and a little grin to show that I wasn't holding anything against her. She returned a faint smile though it never passed beyond her mouth. The second half of the series opener went much like the first half had, though she didn't have to ask to get me to translate. She remained ever calm, collected, and somewhat distant from what I could tell. Watching the six element-bearers deal with the river serpent made her groan, but she didn't explain nor give me any indication that she was willing to.

Celestia's appearance at the end made her genuinely smile, which was a relief. I had worried that something would be seriously off about Celestia's design and that Etherea would react as she had earlier, so seeing the opposite was like a breath of fresh air. And of course I didn't get to enjoy it long - Etherea almost immediately frowned, though I wasn't quite sure what from. I caught the corners of her lips started curling back up just as I was starting to feel nervous about her ups and downs again. I was... so confused.

I had just turned back to find Celestia nuzzling Luna in forgiveness when Etherea spoke. "So that is why Princess Luna looks like a filly. I wonder if that is how she... actually looked after her redemption."

Etherea wasn't actually talking to me judging by her distant, thoughtful gaze. I waited patiently for her to come back and hopefully explain everything. I needed her to tell me about Princess Luna, Twilight and the Element Bearers, and Princess Celestia. There were so many questions to ask about the accuracy of the trials faced by the main six, the representation of Equestria, and... And Etherea was just lying there comfortably and not saying a damned thing. It was infuriating that I was so close, yet so scared of pushing her...

"I'm hungry. And I believe it's about lunch time." Etherea shifted over to the window and looked up. Then she jerked, quickly leaning the other way instead. The sudden movement brought me instantly to my feet. Had she been seen?!

My own quick action caused my chair to bounce a few inches away, and Etherea's ears shot up, her eyes widened as her head whipped around.

"Oh! Sorry. I... It's just your Sun." Her muzzle dipped and a faint orange blossomed about it. Her vibrant violet eyes flicked to me sheepishly before she slowly leaned back toward the window and pointedly looked up again.

"And I'm okay..." she whispered.

She stayed like that for a bit and I wrangled my racing pulse under control with a series of deep breaths. Etherea really was going to be the death of me. And as though she was reading my mind she suddenly hopped off the bed. Four hooves made light thumping sounds - far too light for a pony of her size - and she shuffled her wings until the feathers formed neat lines running down her flanks. She had missed me flinching, but as she walked by I received a curious look.

She stopped, her eyes darting between my face and the hand over my racing heart. "Are... you alright?"

No. "Just peachy, thanks for asking."

She frowned at that. "It's disharmonius to lie, Alex, and that's not good for you. What is really the matter?" Her tail swished as her rump swung around behind her, placing her squarely before me with her jaw set and ears perked. She clearly wasn't taking no for an answer. Fine then.

"I'm..." I swallowed in embarrassment, "I'm just nervous, okay? I'm tired and I'm scared. Let's just leave it at that." I really wasn't comfortable getting in to just how scared I was that someone could have seen her, or that other ponies could come to rescue her from me at any moment, or that there was still a pony plague on the way despite her assurances, or... or that no matter how I handled this situation that my life was about to change for the worse.

I'd probably be considered a nervous wreck by most people but one thing was helping me hold together. It wasn't worth it to work myself up too much over things I could do nothing about, so while I was aware of them, I tried not to allow myself to dwell too much. Yet a part of me was still worried and that made me jumpy. And being jumpy made me overreact when Etherea found something startling.

Etherea started to frown, but she caught herself with a shake and her expression softened. "It's easy to... forget that I'm not alone in this. We really are riding the same cloud."

"'Riding the same cloud?'" What the heck did that mean?

"Oh! Um..." she hummed as she thought, "It means we are... in the same situation. It's a pegasus phrase."

"Ah. Like if I said 'we're in the same boat.'"

"I will take your word for it." She smiled a pleasant little grin at me. "The three... of us can worry together. Come on, I bet you will... feel better after getting something to eat." Her grin widened as she once used my own actions against me. That alone made me feel somewhat better. Proud too - it's not every day that an Equestrian Princess tells you had a good idea, however indirectly.

I followed in Etherea's wake as she left the room, noting the faint scent of lilacs that lingered and wondering just how disturbed I should be for enjoying the rhythmic swishing of her tail. Her sudden turn in to the bathroom brought me up short. I stood there, blinking stupidly and wondering what she was up to until she extended a wing into the shower. Her horn aquired a familiar halo and a matching wave of magic ran across her feathers, sloughing out what little water remained.

She turned to do her other wing and, finding me standing just outside the doorway, arched an eyebrow. I noticed her ears retreating again and quickly made myself scarce. It really was for the best since I still needed to hide the various meat products scattered about our fridge. With our carnivorous fare tucked behind the various veggies, and hopefully well-hidden, I set out the newly-acquired sandwich fixings and made myself a simple peanut butter and jelly affair.

Etherea wandered in to the living area shortly thereafter, a brush following through the air behind her and wings once again folded neatly. I definitely noticed the long pause as she looked warily out the front window, but I pointedly avoided calling attention to it. It was distressingly unsurprising that her ears took a guarded half-mast stance, and even more so that they remained that way even as she approached the kitchen island. Food should be enjoyed, not simply endured, and it looked like she expected to walk in to an unpleasant situation.

Other than her telltale ears she seemed to be right at home. The brush began working its way through her mane again which got me wondering just how much time she was going to spend on getting prepared for nothing. Various items began assembling themselves into a sandwich. Peanut butter, mayonnaise - which she sniffed at first - lettuce, and tomato went in. It was a combination that I would never have thought of in a million years.

While her attention was on the little dance of condiments she leaned to the side and carefully nipped off a petal from one of the roses on the counter. Now that I devoted attention to. She waited until after swallowing to speak.

"What?"

I wasn't sure what I expected since I'd never eaten flowers that I considered 'decorative.' "So... what's it taste like?"

"A bit spicy. Roses are a little like... cinnamon that way. These," she tilted her head toward the flowers, "aren't quite as sharp as I'm used to, so... they must be a little old."

"Well, I'm glad that I made the right choice." I said with obvious relief before taking another bite of my sandwich.

"Your choice was a good one. Now if you had purchased tulips..." She licked her lips as she momentarily looked off in the distance. "They're tangy and sweet, and so delicious."

I grunted around my mouthful and rolled my eyes. She smiled before taking a dainty bite from her own sandwich and for a moment - just one - her ears were up but totally relaxed. I happily let the good mood linger. The only sounds between us were the contented munching and the soft 'whisping' of the brush through her hair.

The smell of food eventually lured Craig out of his den, though he opted for a bowl of Cinnamon Toast Crunch instead of the vegetarian spread that was otherwise available. He passed a long look between Etherea and I as he approached from behind her. I guess he also sensed the prevailing mood because he didn't say a thing.

Dimble wasn't so considerate when he decided that all of us gathered in the 'food area' meant that he was also going to get something. His occasional meow as he padded from one of us to another hardly interrupted though. Unfortunately Etherea was the closest in height to him, and that meant he spent most of his time trying to coax her in to sharing; much to her chagrin at his insistent nosing in to her personal space. He obviously had no idea what she was actually eating, but at least he had quickly adjusted to her presence.

I finished first of course - my head start guaranteed it. "So, will you be joining us watching a couple of My Little Pony episodes? I'm sure even you have questions about ponies." I asked of Craig.

"I guess. 's not like I have anything better to do." He spoke around a mouthful of cereal.

Etherea frowned deeply and gave Craig a hard stare but she had the grace to finish her own bite first. "I will thank... Please finish what you are eating before talking. I do not really... want to see what you have in your mouth; it... is disgusting."

Craig had his spoon in his mouth at that moment and he froze. His eyes shifted between Etherea and I and a faint twitching at the corner of his lips made me realize what was about to happen. He was incorrigible to be sure - a pony like Etherea might say uncultured - and one of his buttons was people who took it upon themselves to 'fix' him.

"Craaaaaiiig..." I drew his name out low and menacingly.

His eyes met mine. I tried to keep my glare steady, which was difficult when facing his unflappable nonchalance. I counted it a great victory when he shrugged and looked away.

"Right. Sorry." Goddamnit Craig. "Oops, sorry!" I put my head down and fought to not laugh as he nearly sprayed cereal while trying to apologize for speaking with a full mouth.

Etherea tried to stare Craig in to oblivion. Or, since she was a pony, maybe she was imagining him exploding in to sunshine and rainbows. Or possibly just taking an extended etiquette lesson courtesy of Rarity. Though I'm pretty sure that would actually be a horrible idea - a meeting between Craig and Rarity could only end catastrophically.

Speaking of things that would probably end badly, I opened my mouth to try switching to a lighter topic.

"So Etherea," her eyes shifted to mine but lost none of their hardness, "er... You said you wanted to see the rest of the episode... I mean... you would wait to judge it until after you'd seen the whole thing. So..." With her frustration at Craig being dircted at me I was back under the gun and falling apart. "What did... do you think?"

A twitch of Etherea's tail and a flick of her eyes toward Craig seemed to foist all of her frustration in his direction, allowing her to relax before getting around to answering my question. "It was a... terrible representation of the actual... events, to be honest. There is so much that is blatantly wrong... that I'm not sure where to begin." I cringed but she quickly launched back in, her volume jumping as she hastily tried to backtrack. "But I'm... not mad or anything! I understand that nopony here should have known anything, so it's still... pretty incredible! The main events... are there and the right ponies are involved, and I'm sure Celestia... would approve of the Harmonious message. It's just... some things are so very... wrong." She finished quietly, clearly worried about insulting us.

She wasn't far off. I understood that she was simply finding fault with whatever differences existed between the actual Equestria and that of the cartoon. But I liked the cartoon. A lot. I wanted her to like it as well, so she not immediately being taken with it was a hard pill to swallow. But then again, having her here to answer my questions was the opportunity of a lifetime.

I hadn't realized the effect of my frustrations on my expression, but I quickly smoothed it over after seeing Etherea hiding her nose partially behind her sandwich.

"Well... I'm very curious as to what the real Equestria is like. This kind of thing is an incredible opportunity." I tried to sound more upbeat than I felt. Which wasn't all that hard once excitement about the ensuing conversation overcame disappointment in Etherea's feelings about the show.

That seemed to mollify her and she came out from behind her protective wall of bread. "I hardly know where to begin." A quick nip reduced the size of her former shield and gave her a moment to think. "For one, Princess Celestia is not that tall. If she were... true to the cartoon then either she would have to crouch to walk around in here," Etherea encompassed the living area in the wave of a hoof, "or other ponies would shorter than this counter." the same hoof tapped the island top.

"Your cartoon makes her look like some kind of... mutant." Etherea sneered as she said that. "In actuality she's... only about half a hoof taller than I. I admit that she... seems much taller because of who and what she is. There's just a sense of power about her that other... ponies don't have."

Etherea again attacked her sandwich. Ponies weren't that different size-wise than the one before me, Celestia included? I don't know why, but I'd never really thought how unrealistic the size differences were in the show.

Okay. Now tell me more! Is her personality similar to in the show? How well do you know her? How closely did the first episodes follow her actual actions? The break in her explanation left me aching for more information. Keep going already!

"Princess Luna would dislike that show, by the way." Etherea leveled a serious look my way. "She is more, um, reserved than Princess Celestia and takes her image... very seriously. She spent the first... year after her redemption sequestered. There were parties held in her name but she did not... attend any of them. In fact, there are no recordings or images of her during that period - Celestia... did not allow it. The only ponies who know what she looked like are the two Celestial Princesses and... the Element Bearers. So she could have... regressed like that, which is funny because she's actually a full hoof taller than Celestia now, though I... doubt that she did."

She giggled. It was light and happy effervescing of emotion as she momentarily lost herself in her thoughts. "Princess Celestia may be... the elder, but she ended up as the 'little' sister."

Etherea caught herself as she realized where she was, her good mood evaporating to be replaced by a careful blankness. Her eyes flicked back and forth as she considered Craig and I.

"So Princess Celestia," I was careful to use her title, "is actually shorter than Princess Luna? Okay, that is funny." I chuckled. It was strange to think, judging by Etherea's height, that the tallest Princess topped out at about five and a half feet. I didn't have proof of it but I was assuming Cadence was shorter than Celestia. Oh, and that there were no more Princesses, which was probably a bad assumption given the one right in front of me.

Both Craig's and Etherea's stares bore down on me. There was an awkward moment as I tried to figure out why I was the target of their attentions. Oh right, I shouldn't know anything about the two ponies in question.

Etherea shook her head just as I figured it out. "Right. I forgot you know of them."

"Well I don't. Anyone wanna' fill me in?" came from Craig.

"Princess Celestia is the... Regent of the Sun and a Diarch of Equestria." Etherea patiently explained. "She generally oversees the daytime... governing of Equestria. Princess Luna is the Regent of the Moon and normally the nighttime Diarch." Unfortunately Craig's confusion didn't waver one bit.

"Craig," both of my companions turned back to me, "yesterday when I said Princess Celestia was the head pony in charge..." He nodded. "There's actually two of them. One controls the sun, and the other controls the moon. They're both really tall in the show, so it's funny that they actually aren't."

Craig's mouth worked for a bit though his cereal remained firmly bowl-bound. "Wait. Back up a bit. You said the one controlled the sun. Now there's two of them." He looked at me until I nodded. "So you've gone and pissed off two powerful super Jedi-Jesus ponies by stealing her?" He furiously directed my attention to the golden yellow pony sitting nearby.

It seemed that Craig's confusion had apparently migrated to set up shop in Etherea, because her only reply to this was a quiet, "What...?"

"Etherea," her ears twitched, "I was just explaining the princesses in terms that would make sense to Craig. And Craig," I turned on him, "no, they're not actually Jesus or Jedis. That was just the best explanation I could think of on the spot. And you're just as much a part of this. I know I set it up, but it was your texts that brought her here."

Craig glared death and dismemberment at me but he knew I was right and could do nothing about it. I could see it in his eyes...

"Wait. You two did this together?" Etherea's voice was carefully neutral - alarmingly so.

I found myself turning on my seat again. Repeating my actions over and over seemed to be a developing trend. Etherea's eyes were narrow slits of glimmering violet as she stared me down, and a very familiar sense of foreboding crept back up my spine.

"Yeah. We kinda' did." Her cheeks took on harsh lines as her jaw tightened. "It was a mistake, okay? It was supposed to be a joke so you'd realize that wires got crossed in the messages and laugh it off. But you took it so seriously." I tried to stare her down but it just wasn't in me.

"We're sorry, alright?" An uneasy silence fell over us as we waited for Etherea's reaction.

"So you," a hoof jabbed at me, "received my initial message and made fun of me. And you," the hoof shifted to Craig, "made fun of me and my mother?"

I nodded. I'm assuming Craig did as well because Etherea's hoof shortly disappeared back behind the counter between us. Her nostrils flared and her lips pulled back to flash rows of white teeth at us, but instead of raining hellfire and brimstone she finished by blasting a huge sigh and laying her chin on the countertop. A soft groan worked its way out of her while I was busying blinking at her sudden shift.

"Fine! I forgive both of you!" She was exasperated and said that through her teeth, but it had still been said. I was stunned for a moment. We were safe just like that? That would be a huge load off my shoulders.

"So..." and of course Craig was the first of us to speak up, "we're cool?"

"Um... 'Cool'?" was Etherea's soft reply.

"Yeah. Like we're friends. Pals. Can kick back and share a beer now." I looked sidelong at Craig with an eyebrow up. Had he just offered one of his beers to a pony Princess?

"Uh. Not really. We're not... enemies though, that much is clear. Just... just help me return home please." And like that we were cool again. At least as much as we ever had been. And judging by Craig's hesitation before taking another bite of his cereal, he was finally feeling the effects of the morning's emotional rollercoaster.

"I think we can do that." I ventured while looking at Craig - he nodded in agreement. "We'll do what we can. Just put in a good word for us if the Princesses find you first, okay?"

Etherea nodded as much as resting her head on the counter allowed - nothing more than several upward jerks of her nose. Her eyes shortly wandered back to the sandwich resting in the air several inches above the counter and she sat back up to continue her lunch. My sense that I should just stay quiet for my own good passed the time arguing with the questions burning in my head about the real Equestria. Apparently I wasn't all that good at hiding it because Etherea eventually began to watch me. I tried to smile the situation away but that only caused her to narrow her eyes fold and her ears tighter.

"What?"

She called me out... Lovely. I tried to waive the whole thing off. "I just have a lot of questions. I'm sure you do too, so don't mind me."

She rolled her eyes and sighed, her wings slipping downward slightly. "Fine. It's something I am sure we will do... sooner or later anyway."

Which technically opened the floodgates but there was so much dross that could come out that none did. I had to sort through what I really wanted to ask. Something meaningful. I needed something that would expand the conversation, and also didn't draw on the extensive fan speculation and extrapolation. And I was drawing a blank.

So I settled on simply continuing the interrupted conversation. "Well, Princess Celestia... Is she anything like her character?"

"From what little I've seen she is." Etherea spoke with a soft but confident voice. "She is one... of the kindest ponies you could ever want to meet. She very quickly forgave L... Princess Luna. I have seen so little of the character that I am not sure how to compare any more than that."

She seemed to be finished for a moment before perking up again. "Oh. And her voice isn't accurate at all. It is a little deeper, more soothing, and she has a bit of a Northshire accent. Well... Not that you know what that is."

"I figured..." I began...

"Yew mean lahk thees?" grated against my ears from behind.

"What?! No!" Etherea sat bolt upright. "Good heavens! That's more like... a griffin trying to speak diamond dog." I clamped my mouth shut as I unsuccessfully tried to hold back snorts of laughter. "No, Northshire... tends to accentuate the 'yoo' sound and roll the 'arr'." Princess Celestia's accent is very faint. Princess Luna's is more noticeable, but she's had to deal with... her separation..." Etherea's mouth twisted to one side as she put some clear effort in to being diplomatic about the whole Nightmare Moon thing.

"Makes sense to me!" I loudly interjected before Craig to say something even more stupid. "So, how about the rest of it? The Element Bearers and the events of that night?"

Etherea opened her mouth and gave me such a strong look of consternation that it brought my ever-present worrying back. She thought about it for a while, eventually replacing her parted lips with a pursed muzzle as she chewed on the inside of her lip. Craig and I exchanged a look but all I got out of it was a shrug from him. At least he didn't seem worried which helped me. Etherea was thinking about it rather than leaping down my throat after all.

"To start, it was not just a single night. It was about... eight days." Etherea cautiously said. "Twi... Lady Velroa had actually been in, um, Ponyville for... about two years at Princess Celestia's request. She - the Princess that is - suspected what... might happen and had prepared for it. Lady Twilight needed to make friends for the Elements to work, and that was not something that could... be done in one day."

I nodded. It made sense to me. Craig and I were good friends, but our relationship had been built up over two years of knowing each other and then living together for one.

"So no instant friendships?" I asked.

"Sort of. The six were friends within a couple of days, but they... needed time to have the strength to wield the elements fully." She passed a look between Craig and I.

"Are these elements like Plutonium and the others from that chart-thingy? Or are we talking the mystical, nerdy elements like fire and water?" Craig paused to take a breath. "Actually fire's pretty cool. Does that mean some pony controls all the fire in your world?" It was a struggle to not ashamedly slap a hand to my face as Etherea gaped at the man behind me.

"N-no..." Etherea stumbled over the words she needed to sort things out. "There are primordial associations with each element - like fire and Loyalty - but the six elements are Kindness, Generosity, Honesty, Loyalty, Laughter, and Magic."

Craig needed a moment to process all of that and we gave it to him. Personally I was dreading what he might pull out of that morass inside his head. He didn't quite turn green while thinking, but he did acquire the look of someone who'd just come across a particularly foul smell.

"Craig..." I preempted.

His eyes met mine and he let out a breath. "Fine. I won't talk about how girly they sound." I finally did facepalm. I could see what he meant though; relying on Laughter as a source for ultimate power would just get you laughed at here on Earth.

"Bu...! Ger...! Nnnnnn...!" Etherea's response was impressively incoherent. "You are... just going to casually dismiss the magic of friendship?!" When I peered at her through my fingers she seemed ready to pop. And once again she showed amazing composure by dismissing her frustrations with a heavy sigh and some choice words muttered under her breath where I couldn't catch them.

I placed my hand on the counter before her and looked deep into those vibrant purple irises of hers, "I'm sorry for Craig. Just nod and continue, and we'll all be saner for it." I ignored the grumble from behind me.

The corners of Etherea's mouth twitched and she nodded once.

"Well then, back to the matter at hoof." Craig snickered and Etherea glowered over my shoulder. "Princess Celestia had left... the physical embodiments of the elements in the Castle of the Royal Pony Sisters - that part was correct - but she did it... because she knew Sussirovenzora Illunae would expect them closer at hoof and to be closely guarded. When Sussirovenzora Illunae returned Princess Celestia fled," I raised my eyebrows at that, "but it was... to make Sussirovenzora think that she was going for the elements herself and to take the fight away from any cities."

Now that made sense. I nodded along and waited patiently when she paused for breath.

"The Bearers took that... time to venture in to Everfree , though it didn't happen much like you have seen. Pinkie Pie," a short snicker from Craig was silenced by another death glare from the pony across from me, "didn't laugh away some... stupid trees; she kept everypony's spirits up while they dealt with the dangers... of Everfree and the prolonged night."

"Minelles didn't tell Vel... Lady Velroa to jump off a cliff." Etherea sneered at that, biting the ends off her words as she said them. "She did do a lot of the hard work in getting everypony through the terrain... of the forest, but more importantly she... prevented the arguments between them from becoming disastrous divisions."

"And Lady Aserelsi?" Once again her chin was lifting as her speaking became more animated. "She basically funded the journey. She provided... their shelters, food, protective apparel... everything they needed to... survive a week in Everfree."

Etherea looked expectantly to me as she finished.

"I'm... not quite sure what I expected." I began, "It makes sense that quite a bit got changed when the cartoon was created. Especially if the entire ordeal was a lot more... dangerous I guess... than we've been led to believe." Etherea nodded.

"I will admit that it... is amazing what you had correct." Judging by her rising tone Etherea was really getting in to this, but that suited me just fine. "Lady Velroa, Laeilethrun, and Ensul Shensoar were pretty accurate even if their contributions were... truncated." I blinked in surprise. I was so used to conversations with Craig and I needed a moment to understand just what Etherea had said. 'Truncated'? That's some high class shit right there.

"Would you believe that... you somehow managed to get Laeilethrun down almost exactly?"

"Who?"

Etherea blinked and cocked her head. "Oh. Um. Yellow pegasus with pink mane and tail?"

"Oh, Fluttershy! So wait, she's almost the same in real life?" Etherea nodded. Okay, that's pretty cool. No. That's fucking awesome. I'm not sure why knowing that Fluttershy was just like the real thing was so exciting, but there was definitely a smile working its way across my face despite my best efforts against it.

Etherea just stared back at me, her expression wary and her body half-turned as though to place a protective wing between us. I was being horribly creepy and I knew it, but it was a long fight to dampen down my excitement. By the time I had myself under control Etherea had returned to nibbling her way through her sandwich and turning the occasional furtive glance my way. A chuckle let me know that Craig was enjoying the whole thing even as he put his dishes in the sink. I knew I was blushing, and that made my mind race. It raced right past anything I might have said coherently, and so I sat there in miserable silence.

Fortunately, whether through shared embarrassment or just sympathy, Etherea rescued me. "So, um, what else has been shown of Equestria?"

However that didn't mean that I was prepared to return to the conversation just yet, so my reply was delayed while I reassembled my thoughts. "Well. Season one starts with the return of Princess Luna and finishes with the... a Grand Galloping Gala. In between those there are a number of episodes where the Bearers deal with random problems and learning lessons about friendship. Season two began with Discord's return..." Another look of confusion made me pause. "Um, a weird mismatched creature that's almost like a god of chaos?"

Etherea jerked backward and her eyes bulged, her entire body locking up. "Ka-oraxk?!"

"Are you okay?" Clearly she wasn't, but after a momentary silence I felt I had to say something.

She shuddered and drew in a breath before shaking her head slowly. She didn't seem to be responding to what I had said so much as clearing her own head. "Y-yeah... I am fine. Ka-oraxk was a very different manner... of problem from Nightmare Moon. And it... can't do anything here." She looked back to Craig and I with a tentative smile, but that last bit was more to herself than either of us. "I should have nothing to fear from... a cartoon version of it."

"I would doubt that he could reach us here." I tried to reassure her. "It was hard enough for you to get here and you sort of had a destination planned."

"Actually, it might be the... most capable of finding its way here unaided," Etherea shook her head slowly as she responded, "since Ka-oraxk is not one... to follow conventional rules. But I suspect you are right and... that its reliance on Harmony might prove to be insurmountable even for it."

"How about an explanation for the guy who has no idea what the hell you two are talking about?" Craig grumped.

Etherea lifted her head to look over my shoulder and respond, but I stopped her with a raised hand. Her brows drew together as her look became a glare. I gave my best apologetic look - though I'm sure I sucked at it.

"Just keep it simple." I advised as gently as I could, trying to plan around the vast discrepancies between Craig's and Etherea's knowledges.

Etherea nodded after staring me down for a moment. It was a relief to feel the weight of her disapproval lift.

"Ka-oraxk is a creature of... chaos and has the power to change the world around it however it wants. It revels in spreading mayhem and destruction. Unfortunately it... doesn't seem to follow the normal rules of reality, so something that should... work - like striking it - is just as likely fail for no reason. Naturally that makes... Ka-oraxk very difficult to combat."

Craig barely waited for her last word before opening his own mouth. "Well, don't worry your pretty little head. We'll protect you, won't we Alex?" The twitch of his right eye at me was probably a supposed to be a secret wink, knowing him. I gave an exaggerated roll of my eyes.

"That is all well and good, but Ka-oraxk..." Etherea trailed off in to a small dismissive snort and a cute little wrinkling of her nose. "Thank you, but I... do not think that Ka-oraxk will be a concern." She turned fully back to me. "There is more about Equestria in that show? You said Ka-oraxk," her shudder was faint, "was just the... beginning of the second season?"

"Um, yeah. Most of season two played out like season one, with many little vignettes of the Bearers everyday lives and the friendship lessons learned. It ended with Princess Cadance's and Shining Armor's wedding and the Changeling attack..." Etherea squeaked and went rigid again.

I swallowed the rest of what I had been about to say when I saw her reaction. Apparently every single major event in Friendship is Magic had a corresponding one from the real Equestria. Thinking about it, if Equestria was as different from the cartoon as it seemed then the events I was describing were probably major catastrophes. Nightmare Moon negating all sunlight would be a horrific scenario when applied to a real planet. Discord turning the fundamental laws of reality inside out at his whim would be more so. And to top it off, Etherea had shown great reverence for Celestia and I'd casually mentioned an event that might nearly have killed the princess.

A horrible squeezing sensation spread through my chest as I realized how this must sound to her. I imagined that if I saw a cartoon glorifying the holocaust - and that was probably an awful comparison to make - I would probably be just as horrified as she. Horrify the pony I was trying to befriend; what an absolutely perfect way to continue the day!

"I'm sorry. These must be terrible memories for you..." I couldn't find the words to express my mortification. Etherea's head had tilted down until her chin nearly rested against her neck, but it shot up as I tried to appologize.

"Ee-er... ah. Hnnn? What?" Her sudden incoherence was really bizarre. And so was the rapid-fire blinking she was doing, like she hadn't understood a word I'd said. She didn't seem as sad or angry as I expected. What was going on? "I... uhh... Wait. Nononono...! It wasn't... You do not need to worry. I was not there, and a lot of... good actually came of it!"

"You just surprised me. That is all." She gave me a small smile. By itself it wasn't as reassuring as she probably intended, but I relaxed because I couldn't see any sign of any really negative emotion.

I looked her up and down for a second while I made sure that opening my mouth was going to be safe. "So... You're okay with it?"

She nodded emphatically. "It was very scary for everypony at those times, but the damage in each case... was minimal and everything has turned out for the best. L... Princess Luna is back and Sussirovenzora Illunae is no more. Ka-oraxk is safely... encased in stone. And there is... peace between Equestria and the Changeling Unification."

Peace with the changelings?! Okay, I needed to ask about that. But later, since there was something even more important.

"Well..." I really was relieved that she wasn't actually angry at our callous misrepresentation of Equestria's worst moments, but I had to be sure. Now that I'd made the connections myself, it felt like she was brushing off these events far too easily. "You're sure?" It was a stupid question, but she nodded again.

That Etherea wasn't too upset was promising, though it felt a little strange. Humans probably wouldn't be so quick to brush events like those off. But then, she wasn't human. I'd already seen that some things about ponies were actually true - at least in Etherea's case - and their positive attitudes seemed to be one of them. The show might have gotten some things wrong but so much was also right.

And hopefully it meant that if anyone came looking for Etherea that they would ask questions first and shoot later. Especially if they saw Etherea well-taken care of and in good spirits. I still didn't relish the idea that more ponies would be popping out in the apartment - especially not guardsponies - so I was still hoping to send Etherea home first. And quickly too, so that I didn't have much chance to make a greater fool of myself.

And that went double for my newfound desire to spend time just looking at her.

"So..." Etherea quietly interrupted my thoughts. "Can I see that one?"

"Hmmmmm?" What one?

"The episode with the... um... wedding."

"Oh, yeah. I suppose we can do that." I noticed that even though she was watching me, her ears were twitching back and forth as though she wasn't paying full attention. "You're sure you want to see it...?" And I just had to keep checking.

"Yes. I do." Her nod was even stronger than before.

And with that we got up as one. Well, Etherea and I did since Craig was already standing. He was silently appraising me as we moved the dishes next to the ones already occupying the sink. While Etherea wandered back to my room, the two of us lingered and engaged in an uneasy staring contest. I was vaguely aware that she gave us a questioning glance just before disappearing into the hallway.

"What?" I challenged when Etherea was fully gone. Craig just shrugged. "You coming with? It'd probably be good for you to see this as well. I can't be around her every moment of the day, so you should probably get to know her too."

"Eh..." I could see the gears churning in his head. "Well, I guess it's not like I got anything better to do. But cartoon ponies, man... Ugh!"

"You'll be fine!" I reassured with a chuckle.

Author's Notes:

So that was part 1.

Part of the difficulty I had was even though there's a bunch of stuff in this chapter, it's what I considered a "boring" chapter. There's a lot of establishing what's going on, and dealing with the transition from first contact to actually living together, but there's not a whole lot of actual action. I felt it needed hashing out simply because it would happen, and it foreshadows and colors just about everything that happens next.

I'm still worried about one thing; there's a lot of head canon coming out here, but I can't think of a way that it wouldn't come up. (Honestly, I'd never intended for Etherea find out about MLP in chapter 4, but as an intelligent being there was just no way for her not to notice something was up.) Hopefully I made the rest of the chapter interesting enough to compensate.

And you know what this chapter means? In a few days you'll also have part 2!

And now, the deleted parts!

Etherea imitating Rarity while talking about the MLP poster - because Etherea wasn't ready to be this casual -

I raised an eyebrow as Etherea broke out a stiff, affected accent. "Good heavens, but this is positively dreadful! How on earth could you be so crass as go around showing something so juvenile? Think of the affect this could have on my sister's image. Please, remove it at once! I will thank you to never produce it again!"

Etherea describing Nightmare Moon - because Etherea's didn't yet want to detail just how vicious Nightmare Moon was -

"Even worse was that her disharmony apparently formed some sort of intangible aura around her. Just being near her could twist ponies to join her and darkness literally lived in her presence. She didn't just knock away a trio of guards with a mis-aimed bolt of lightning. An entire regiment of guardsponies fell when every shadow rose up, took a solid form, and fought for her. Twilight said that Luna wasn't even using magic to do that - she could just walk around and it would happen!"