Temper Violetta

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Suggested background music: John Phillip Sousa - 'The Pathfinder of Panama', performed by "The President's Own" United States Marines Band [2017]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q5n_AhS0IeI

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This wasn’t supposed to be a part of Lieutenant Violetta’s Area of Concentration.

There were ten VIP quaternions under her command -- as many as forty guardsponies serving as VIP bodyguards under the jurisdiction of the Canterlot Palace Military Office. She briefed them before they started, introduced them to their charges, handled any requests or complaints, read each team leader's weekly report, plus any other reports they may care to make, and debriefed them at the end of their assignment. And since those postings could be as brief as just a day or two, it was a considerable amount of work.

For this task, the Equestrian Royal Guard had seen fit to assign her office a single private for general tasks and running messages. A pair of sergeants served as clerical assistants to the CPMO VIP section as a whole, which consisted of four lieutenants, including herself, under the command of Captain Bute, with a couple more privates trotting around making coffee and running errands.

Generally speaking, it all worked very well. Captain Bute prided himself on the fact that, under his watch, no guardspony had been blindly presented to a VIP without them having been thoroughly briefed on their client's character, profession, habits, daily routines, cutie mark (if applicable), and special needs (if any). In brief, nopony serving the CPMO had ever complained of being unprepared to handle a given VIP.

It was true that sometimes the VIPs themselves complained about their servants, but this was rare. In the two years Violetta had been in the CPMO, a grand total of just two bodyguards had been dismissed. Black marks, to be sure, since her office had the final task of accepting or refusing any graduate sent to her by the VIP Service Training school.

But one thing neither she, nor Captain Bute, nor any of the other three lieutenants in the Canterlot Palace Military Office VIP section had ever had to deal with was a complaint about a VIP and their quaternion from someone else.

And Captain Bute had not been happy to receive it.

Arriving at the scene, Violetta surveyed the damage so far. That insidious batpony, Ebonshield, a supposed 'sergeant first class,’ was sitting in the middle of the otherwise empty stands at the Royal Eastern Cottage palace race track. Lieutenant Violetta wouldn't be surprised if Ebonshield was somehow responsible for the complaint, and she hollered up at the batpony from the ground.

"Sergeant Ebonshield! What's going on here?!"

She was wearing a lot more armor than when the lieutenant had first introduced her, or when she’d come by asking about special armaments for the Royal Engineer; some kind of black-dyed stiff cuirass covered her torso.

"Lieutenant Violetta, good day to you, sir. I do not understand your question?"

The expected non-answer from a devious member of a devious race.

"Sergeant, my office has received a complaint about an unauthorized live-fire exercise being conducted on palace grounds, involving this location, your quaternion, and your VIP! Now, I want an explanation!"

Before the batpony could give her one, Violetta heard the unmistakable crash of Dual-Purpose Improved Conjured Munition rounds slamming into heavy bronze armor. Her head swiveled towards the source of the noise, and she made out a carriage travelling at high speed on the racetrack itself -- yet, without anypony pulling it! -- with Specialist Glamerspear perched atop, hurling rounds up towards an airborne Specialist Sparkshower.

In front, Corporal Bound was sitting next to a very tall somepony encased in a strange, black metal armor -- somepony who could only be Lieutenant Violetta’s most alien and most demanding VIP, Anonymous, By Appointment to Their Majesties Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, Royal Engineer of Equestria.

"Ah, I see, Lieutenant. I think for the explanation you may have it as soon as the Engineer Royal arrives."

Violetta shook her head at the bizarre sight. "What the blazes..."

Watching, stunned, she saw the armored pegasus swing around and make another mock charge on the confusingly unpowered vehicle, only to receive another burst of rounds for her trouble. Mercifully, now that Violetta was down there, she recognized that they weren’t real DPICM spears -- just training munitions.

That was a load off for her eventual report on this situation. Instead of an unauthorized live-fire exercise being conducted on palace grounds, it was an unauthorized simulated-fire exercise being conducted on palace grounds. Provided she could shut things down quickly, it should be possible to brush it all under the rug as just a scheduling mix-up. That would take a weight off the lieutenant’s shoulders and Captain Bute's breath off her neck.

Violetta jumped over the fence and rushed out onto the circuit proper, throwing up her forehooves as she stood on her hind legs in the neatly-cropped grass, still wet and a little muddy from that afternoon's light rainshower.

"Halt! Halt, in the name of the Royal Guard!"

The carriaged continued to trundle towards her, and only now could Violetta see Corporal Bound and the Royal Engineer bending over to fiddle with some kind of controls.

‘What is even keeping that carriage going??’

From the stands, the batpony tried to dissuade Violetta from her course of action. "Ehh, Lieutenant, it may not be advisable to position yourself in this manner. I have observed that--"

Presumably defending her VIP's current activities, Ebonshield’s loyalty to her charge was commendable, but her loyalty to her commanding officer -- herself! -- ought to come first!

"I'm shutting this down, Sergeant, right now!" Violetta returned her attention to the carriage, which was getting menacingly close. "Halt, I say! Corporal Bound, bring that machine to a halt! That's a direct order!"

There was no response, just more hurried-looking fussing about in the front seat.

In the stands, 'Sergeant' Ebonshield stood up. "Lieutenant, I strongly suggest you step aside!"

"Nonsense, Sergeant, they won't dare run me over!"

"This is not in their power to choose!"

As the carriage bore down on Violetta at furious speed, she suddenly realized that the race track was rather narrow in this particular section, and that the carriage was going to occupy most of the space between the fences.

And she was right in the middle of the field.

Looking up with wide eyes, Corporal Bound screamed out at her. "OUT OF THE WAY, WE'VE GOT NO BRAKES!!"

Before she’d even finished hollering her warning, Violetta had already decided to bolt, but on the rain-slick turf, all she could seem to do was slip in place, barely moving. That's when she heard the crack of another burst of DPICM rounds, and a split-second later, she felt something thud into her flank armor. The impact took the breath from her lungs, but it also sent her flying, toppling over sideways as the hapless lieutenant sailed a few hooves in the air and then slid a dozen more on the ground, barely avoiding a post as she was spun away towards the inner fence.

Behind her, Violetta heard the thunder of four carriage wheels go by, accompanied by a strange, repeating 'PFFSHT-PFFSHT-PFFSHT' noise.

Coughing, air returned to Violetta’s throat and she shook her head, before struggling up to her hooves. As the lieutenant dazedly turned to look, the bizarre dogcart suddenly dog-tailed, swerving left and right on the slippery grass, before finally spinning completely around and coming to a stop, fifty meters down the track. A moment later, Sergeant Ebonshield materialized at her side, having fluttered over during the distraction.

"Lieutenant, are you injured?"

Violetta looked at her flank and was relieved to see no blood, only green grass-marks and bits of turf, before turning to Ebonshield with a frown. "I'm fine... I think. What just happened, Sergeant?"

The batpony nodded towards the car. "The carriage of the Engineer Royal has malfunctioned. The Specialist Glamerspear brushed you aside with the force of some of her projectiles, before you could be run over."

Violetta shook her head. "Merciful Celestia..."

Down the track, at the dog-cart, she saw its three occupants shamble out, looking dizzy and disoriented. Specialist Sparkshower landed in front of her VIP and helped him get his bearings, as he proceeded to rip off his helmet.

‘That's the Royal Engineer, all right.’

‘What the Tartarus is going on?’

Violetta saw Anonymous fiddle with something underneath the carriage as Sparkshower checked on her other two quaternion-mates. Shortly after, they all hustled over towards Violetta’s position.

Anonymous was the first to speak, with the corporal panting at his side. "Terribly sorry about that, Lieutenant. We tried to stop, but it turns out we had the brakes applied this whole time out here, and we cooked them so hot they were useless." He turned to the unicorn on his other flank. "Some quick thinking by Specialist Glamerspear got you out of our way; I hope not too painfully."

Violetta nodded, frowning. "I'll be alright. But just what is going on here, my Lord?"

The Royal Engineer chuckled, beaming a smile. "Why, the first-ever test of the first-ever prototype for Equestria's first-ever Self-Propelled Air Defense Weapon, of course! Although, given how well Specialist Glamerspear managed to target you on the ground, maybe we should aim for the first armored car, instead."

‘The what or the what, now?’

"I beg your pardon, sir?"

He nodded his head back to the strange vehicle. "That's my steam-powered carriage. I wanted to see how well Specialist Glamerspear could perform her anti-aircraft duties while mounted in it."

Lieutenant Violetta looked over at the unicorn, whose expression could best be described as a strange combination of exhilaration, dizziness and fear. No doubt the fear was of the 'about to be punished under article 90 for striking an officer' variety. She flexed her hips and found that there was no lasting pain or loss of movement, before nodding at Glamerspear. "I see. I appreciate the last-minute save, Specialist."

That got her a respectful salute and relieved sigh from the pony in question, but Violetta turned her attention to the obvious source of all this trouble. “However, my Lord, I must ask that you cease this activity at once. The Royal Eastern Cottage racetrack is not an appropriate place for an unscheduled training drill."

The tall Very Important Pony who wasn't actually a pony ran his fingers through his hair. "Oh, did we disturb someone? I'm terribly sorry; I was told that when there wasn't a scheduled event here at the track, it was free for any of the palace guests to use."

She’d have to double-check on that one; it was probably true, though.

"I'm not aware of the rules in detail, m'Lord, but regardless, if such a free use was permitted it would be for purely civilian activities, and not a simulated-fire military drill."

At this, the bipedal creature looked a bit sheepish. "Ah. I suppose we were making a bit of a racket, weren't we? Well, I do apologize, Lieutenant. I'm afraid I've been a bit over-eager to get this project off the ground." Wiping his brow, he flicked up the helmet in his hands. "We'll certainly halt for now. But since you're here, perhaps you can help us locate a more appropriate venue?"

Violetta frowned, and looked over the crew assembled before her. Now that it was clear no one was injured and no one was about to be seriously punished, there was a mixture of faces in the little circle. The Royal Engineer, of course, looked bright-eyed and enthusiastic. Corporal Bound seemed apologetic, but showed no sign of wanting to gainsay her VIP. Specialist Glamerspear had a strange look of satisfaction on her face, like she'd just solved some intractable problem. Specialist Sparkshower, having flipped up her bascinet helm, was panting with a broad grin on her face. Even 'Sergeant' Ebonshield wore a curiously delicate smile.

The lieutenant sighed. It was clear that the Royal Engineer was using his VIP quaternion as more than mere bodyguards. Instead of treating them as the decorations that they generally were, or even making use of them in more... 'archaic' ways, he was involving them in his actual day-to-day work.

That made things complicated.

She looked over the quaternion. "To be quite honest, sir, involving your VIP bodyguards in activities of this manner is quite unorthodox." Switching her gaze back to the Royal Engineer, she couldn’t help but notice the sudden elimination of several of their smiles. "The Royal Guard has its own Ordnance Department for fielding tests of military prototypes like what you're proposing. Wouldn't it be better for you to work with ponies from that branch to develop your prototype?"

The black-metal-clad biped sighed and shrugged his shoulders. "I suppose... The thing is, Lieutenant, I'm not actually trying to develop the prototype. It's just a means to an end." He turned sideways and gestured at the car. "That vehicle is the herald of a new industrial era for Equestria. I want to show off the vehicle to Princess Celestia and whoever else might be impressed with it, in order to secure a next step in funding. I thought throwing together a little military demonstration would help make the case even better than just the civilian applications."

Violetta turned to Corporal Bound, feeling more confused than ever. "Corporal, I'm expecting your weekly report tomorrow, but since I'm clearly missing some important pieces right now, perhaps you'd care to bring me up to speed on what's happened since last Wednesday?"

The earthy pony swallowed and then looked around and began, somewhat hesitantly. "Quite a lot, Lieutenant Violetta, ma'am. The Royal Engineer built a carriage powered by water and lamp oil, to which you've already been introduced. I assisted a little in its construction, and I've been serving as the Lord Engineer's test driver."

The Lord in question patted her reassuringly on the shoulder. "And you've been doing an excellent job!"

Emboldened, Corporal Bound continued. "Thank you, sir. Lieutenant, the Royal Engineer also ordered, and received, the suit of custom armor which he's presently wearing. And, yesterday, we went down into the Night Guard Rookery under Canterlot Mountain where-"

Instantly Violetta threw her hooves up to her ears. "Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta, I don't want to hear it! Don't-Ask-Don't-Tell, remember! I'm still subject to it."

Anonymous chuckled. "Come now, Lieutenant, don't be ridiculous. Princess Luna absolved the members of my quaternion from DADT when she gave us all the batponies' backstory. You asked for a report, and if you can't hear it from the Corporal, then I can give it to you instead."

Violetta lowered her hooves and shook her head. "If it doesn't have anything to do with this carriage of yours, then I'm not interested in it at the moment, my Lord. Let's stick to the matter at hoof."

Corporal Bound piped up again. "Look, Lieutenant, it's just like the Royal Engineer said. We're all helping him out with this demonstration, and even though it's not a normal part of VIP duties, I think I speak for everypony when I say we're enthusiastic about doing it. And since the Royal Engineer's on a tight schedule, there must be some way we can get this done without hoofing everything over to Ordnance."

As she’d feared, there were enthusiastic nods all around. Sitting down, Violetta brought her hooves up to her eyes to wipe away some of the chunks of grass that got embedded in her helmet after her little power-assisted emergency egress. As she did so, visions of requisition and scheduling forms danced in her head.

Well, at least it was better than court-martial letters and formal reprimands.

Sighing, she lowered her forehooves and looked around. "All right, my Lord. I think I can manage to book you an appropriate time for your exercises -- and for your demonstration, too, if you need me to do it. But if you're going to test or demonstrate an anti-aircraft weapon in Canterlot airspace, then you're going to need approval from the sector air defense commander. It was the regular palace air patrol that reported the unauthorized firing going on here."

Anonymous nodded. "Understandable. Tell me who to talk to, and I'll present my formal apologies to them, along with a request to continue our activities."

Violetta swallowed. "Yes, my Lord. The thing is, though..."

Clearing her throat, she continued. "...ahem... The pony in charge of Canterlot Sector air defense is Major-General Georgia Hoofstrong, commander of the First Air Division. And, since you just had me write up one of her Lieutenants for court-martial offences last week..."

She grit her teeth.

"... You may find her… intransigent."

Next Chapter: Chapter 82 Estimated time remaining: 21 Hours, 21 Minutes