Everyday Life With Guardsmares
Chapter 41
Previous Chapter Next ChapterHonour Bound
By Celestia, Corporal Bound was going to get something juicy out of this little game of secrets.
'Joint training,' her plot; this was literally just fillies sitting around the table getting drunk. A sport in which, she had to admit, she was already well ahead of the pack.
How many drinks was it, now? Eight? Or was it nine? From different experiments with that 'Maestro Cazador' dragon-head stuff from the freaking moon, plus a tall glass of gin and juice.
‘Damn.’
Honour hadn't hit the sauce that hard since way back when she was just an E-1 Private recruit, fresh out of horseshoe camp. Even as the front of her head started to throb, something in the back was craving more. Honour reached over to get her hooves on the bottle of Griffonese vodka.
‘'Naród,' eh?’
At least Glamerspear had good taste in hooch. Speaking of her unicorn squadmate, she'd recovered from her shock at Honour’s question, and was now busying herself with trying to deflect it.
"My appointment to Centurion? Come on, Corporal, that's a matter of public record. Anypony can look it up in the Official Rolls of the Order. You don't need to waste your spin on that."
Honour was not in the mood to drink the vodka neat. Not yet, anyways. Casting her eyes around, she spotted a bottle of vermouth, as yet mostly untouched. Perfect; she could have a vodka martini, and if that didn’t hit the spot, she could chase it with a real, gin one afterwards.
As Honour grabbed the shaker and set to work appeasing the back part of her brain while killing the front, she shut down Glamerspear's babbling.
"I want to hear it from your mouth, Glamerspear."
As she blended the two alcohols with a vigorous working of the shaker, Glamerspear chuckled awkwardly. "Why? Heh, I mean, what am I gonna say you couldn't find out in a book?"
Paying her no attention, Honour brimmed her highball glass with the stiff cocktail.
Glamerspear babbled on. "You do seem to love books, after all, what with the way you've had your snout buried in Anon's all this time."
Picking up the glass, Honour wondered if maybe she should take things a little slower. It was a reasonable thought. But she hadn’t quite reached the point of 'happy,' so she took a far bigger gulp than would be polite in anything other than private company. Anything faster, and she’d be chugging it down.
That word brought back some memories -- and not good ones -- so as soon as the sting passed by her throat, she cringed and took another sip, almost choking from the strength.
"I don't want to look it up in a book, Specialist. I want you to tell me--"
Shaking her head to clear the rush, Honour fixed Glamerspear in her gaze.
"Because I want to know why you tried to keep it hidden."
Honour’s statement hit Glamerspear like only the truth could. To her right, Purity licked her lips and nodded at the shaker. There was still plenty left inside, so Honour gently slid it over to the batpony. Sparkshower on the left was still bouncing intermittently, but she kept looking quizzically between the two of them.
‘So Glamerspear didn't tell her about the medal after all?’
That just cemented her position.
But the horn-shackled unicorn curled her shoulders inwards and tried to laugh off Honour’s question, the metal cone on her head bobbing as she feigned innocence. "Me? Try to keep it hidden? That's prepppa-prepo-...preposterous!"
Looked like she wasn’t as much of a heavweight as she thought when it came to booze.
"Don't mino-shit me, Glamerspear. The Lieutenant didn't even mention your award when she introduced you to us -- or to the Royal Engineer. Your ex-coltfriend was shocked to hear about it. And I've never seen you wear a medal until today. You're the most private Centurion I ever heard of."
Glamerspear looked left and right, hoping for allies against Honour’s assault, but Purity was just sitting back, looking completely at home with her vodka martini, while Artemis was wearing the same dopey smile, apparently eager to hear the story.
Finally, Glamerspear just scrunched up her face. "Maybe I'm just a private pony, okay? Maybe I don't like to flaunt it."
Okay, that was so pathetic Honour actually laughed out loud.
"Pffft, haha, yeah right! Of course you'd like to flaunt it, Lily..."
Using her first name for emphasis, Honour planted a hoof under her chin and slouched over sideways. "You're a flaunter. You can't help it. So I want to know why you don't flaunt this. How come you wore it today for Princess Luna?"
She blinked and shrugged. "She's a Sovereign of the Order. It's expected for members to wear it in the Royal Presence."
Honour leaned forward with a smirk. "Except so is Princess Celestia, but you didn't wear it when we were first presented to Her Majesty and the Royal Engineer."
"All right, all right!" With a sigh, Glamerspear realized the gig was up, and reached for the shaker in front of Ebonshield.
Looks like it's vodka martinis all around the table. If Sparkshower wanted in, that is.
"Ooh, what's that drink called? I want some!"
"It's a vodka martini, Sparkshower. Take it slowly."
"Alright!" The bouncy pegasus pushed a clean tumbler forward, and Glamerspear filled it halfway before taking the same for herself.
Taking a sip, Honour’s unicorn gunner seemed to deflate. "Okay, fine, you want to hear it, I'll tell you..."
Lifting her head and wearing a defeated expression, Glamerspear shrugged. "... I earned it during the Changeling Invasion. My group, the 86th Honorable Artillery Company, part of the 79th Anti-Aircraft Brigade, was set up just inside Canterlot city limits, on the outer ring of the middle tier."
She glanced around the table. "You were all around for the invasion, right? Canterlot was on high alert; I don't know if they told you guys what was going on, but they sure didn't tell us. It was just 'vigilo confido' -- keep watch and stay ready, for whatever."
With her snout still halfway in her drink. Sparkshower pulled the glass away and licked her lips. "I don't think anypony really knew what was coming, Lily. I was flying recon and, although we were in the wrong grid to catch the Changelings coming in, all we had to go on was that there had been unusual activity in the far reaches of Equestria. And then of course, there was the wedding..."
Sparkshower trailed off, and Glamerspear resumed. "I guess that's it. Weird stuff at the border, plus a big-ticket Royal Canterlot wedding..."
Glamerspear shrugged again, taking a sip of her drink before continuing. "I was one of three on shield duty -- no conjuring spears for me that day, unless I needed to swap in with one of the gunners. Anyways, with the big city shield up, courtesy of the soon-to-be Prince, I was running at maintenance levels, just keeping things warm up here..." She gestured at her horn, still shackled with cold iron and encased in a protective medical cone. "... in case anything happened. Which, of course, it did."
Pausing for another sip, she lifted her eyebrows. “Our position was the only one that held out and kept firing during the whole engagement. There's a news photo of the aftermath -- Changeling bodies, hundreds of them, poked full of holes by AA spears, piled up in a neat circle around the central shield radius, as if we were trying to build a wall out of corpses. The official kill number assigned to our company was a little over three hundred, but the same report acknowledged it may have been more than twice that, since it's known that the other four batteries in our defense zone were all knocked out within the first minutes of the assault, whereas ours kept firing for the whole half-hour."
Everypony was hanging on her next word, but Glamerspear just blankly stared at her glass, looking somber.
“We were a 'cornfield' company -- all unicorns, you know -- so as the gunners or other shield-casters went down, the spotters stepped up and kept up the work. Even the officers jumped in and poured on the fire. The other two shield-bubbles collapsed under the storm, but I managed to extend mine enough to cover our fallen and keep up the firing. By the end, when the invaders got blasted out of the city, the whole Company was either worn-out or knocked-out, though my shield stayed operational until relief found us..."
She looked up, face still impassive. "Took out over three hundred of theirs for zero losses of our own. Almost everypony in the Company was in line for a ribbon at the very least, and since most of the work was done under the cover of my shield, that's why I got awarded the Silver Ram."
Sparkshower had her hooves on her cheeks, elbows on the table and a look of wonder on her face. Even the stony-faced Ebonshield looked suitably impressed.
And it was a good story, but there was still something that didn't add up.
"Sounds like you really deserved it. So why don't you wear the medal more often?" Honour let a smirk creep back onto her face. "And if you want colts like Captain Mailedhoof fawning over you, that's a sure ticket for it."
Rather than take the compliment or react to the playful ribbing, Glamerspear just sighed.
"Because I don't remember a single thing about the whole day."
She lifted her eyes. "Everything I told you, I only know because that's what other ponies in the 86th told me! The ones who kept fighting until the end said I was the one who kept the shield going under the withering assault of all those Changelings. Our spears kept firing for half an hour, and everypony in the 100-unicorn company wound up needing medical treatment for exhaustion or for first- or second-degree manaburn, but I woke up almost a month later in the infirmary with no memory of what had happened."
Honour saw her suck in the edges of her mouth. "Tartarus, I only know for certain I was on shield duty because it's written on the duty sheet for that day!"
Glamerspear mashed her left hoof into her chin and cheek, roughly massaging herself. It looked like she was trying to hold back tears.
Snorting loudly, she waved the other hoof up aimlessly and then dropped it to the table. "So yeah, I don't like to flaunt it..."
Glum and dejected, Honour’s manaburning unicorn stared down at the middle of the table.
"... Just doesn't feel right to be proud of something you're not sure if you really did or not."
Honour was at a loss for words. Sparkshower reached out a hoof and silently placed it on top of Glamerspear's. There were a few tears welling up in the unicorn's eyes, but she quickly wiped them away.
With a sniffle, she lifted her head up. "Alright? So who's next? Let's make this party happy again."
She forced a smile and playfully waved off Sparkshower's hoof of support, but Honour still wondered about something.
"Hold up. Why did you wear it for Luna?"
Grinning, Glamerspear rolled her head around and playfully bounced her forehooves on the table. "Hey, one spin, one question, right?" She sniffled and wiped another tear away.
"Come on. Eight days ago you wouldn't wear it for Princess Celestia. What happened today?"
Sighing, she banged her hooves on the table, more loudly this time. "Jeez, you don't give up, Corporal. Okay, you want to know what happened? THIS happened!"
She pointed both hooves up at her horn. "This stupid cone and this stupid set of shackles, alright? That's what happened."
"I can actually remember the fight with Kilfeather, and I figured, well, if I could manaburn myself so badly gunning him down, maybe I really did do what they said I did. Most unicorns can only overload themselves so far, passing out when they've barely gone over their limit. To do what I did on Saturday, I would have had to go something like ten times over my normal. But I did."
She gathered her hooves up around her drink. "So, maybe I did keep the shield going, enlarging it to cover the other gunners, and holding it steady. Maybe I really did wind up in a coma from covering my comrades, and not from anything else. Maybe I really do deserve the Silver Ram. That's why I wore it today. And it's why I was thinking of maybe wearing it more often."
She looked at Honour, almost as if she was asking for her approval. Honour nodded slowly.
Sparkshower piped up, louder than she ought to be -- but that was probably the booze at work.
"I think you should wear it more, Lily! I think it looksh good on you! I bet Princess Luna saw it and thought it looked good on you, too! I bet even Anonymous noticed how smart you looked! You should wear it next time you're on duty, and I bet you he'll say something about it!"
Even Ebonshield got in on the hugbox. "Yes, I think also. You must wear it for your Capitán Mayedhoof, to show him your superb calidad!"
Glamerspear started to chuckle, playfully batting away the praise, semi-drunkenly mispronounced and mistranslated as it was.
Honour sighed and rolled her head over to the batpony Sergeant. "You know Captain Mailedhoof is married, right? Glamerspear is the 'other' mare."
"¿Ah, sí? Then he must have an eye for gorgeous young mares of outstanding capability and excellent character."
That had Glamerspear's cheeks turning rosy, and she tried to scoff off the praise. "Okay, seriously. Someone spin the damn bottle. I like attention as much as the next filly--"
"I'd say more than the next filly," Honour interjected.
She shook her head around in surrender. "Fine, I bucking LOVE attention, okay? I'm an attention-whorse, alright? I love attention more than everypony else in Canterlot put together, that good enough for you?"
Smirking, Honour nodded and finished off her vodka martini.
Glamerspear waved Ebonshield and Sparkshower toward the middle of the table. "Now, somepony take my turn and give me a few moments to pull myself together, okay?"
Somepony went for the bottle, but Honour wasn’t paying attention.
With her glass empty, she reached for the gin.
Time to compare the vodka-based knock-off with the original recipe.
Suggested interlude music: Major Lazer - 'All My Love' (feat. Ariana Grande & Machel Montano), remix
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O5wlxT9ygtY
