Honour Bound

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Corporal Honour Bound, with her hooves held to her ears, was watching her victorious unicorn comrade puke her very guts out. Holy Celestia, how could one pony even have that much inside them? Did she eat the entire buffet at breakfast this morning?

But at least she was still standing.

...Mostly.

More importantly, that enormous volley, which was probably loud enough to be heard all the way back in Canterlot, seemed to have utterly annihilated Lieutenant Kilfeather. The humor squad over at the bridge had collectively dropped their jaws to the ground in shock. To Honour’s left, Anonymous was flat on his back, knocked over by the report of Glamerspear's incredible attack. Cradling the immense coincidence-rangefinder binoculars, he struggled to his feet before slinging the rangefinder over his shoulder. The Royal Engineer took a moment to survey the scene of carnage and sickness before him.

"Corporal, are you absolutely certain that 'totem' is protecting everypony?"

She nodded. "Believe me, sir, things get just as brutal during the MXP Games, and nopony winds up going away with anything worse than aches and pains. Although, I've never seen a unicorn suffer third-degree acute mana poisoning under its effects before..."

She kept her eyes on Glamerspear, seeking to make sure she was okay. After Glamerspear finished throwing up more than enough to fill up what would surely be Equestria's most disgusting swimming pool, Honour watched the unicorn finally catch her breath.

"... It must be working, because under normal circumstances, she'd be in so much pain that she wouldn't be able to stand up."

Taking a deep breath of exasperation, Anonymous lifted his hat and wiped his brow. "Well, that's two. Let's see if Sparkshower can make it three. In the meantime, I'm going to put these bloody things away before I damage them."

Slowly, he trudged off toward the edge of the road.

"Sir, you might as well call the carriage back. We've earned the right to continue on our way, at least."

"Good idea, Corporal."

Hefting the heavy weight up further on his shoulder, he put two fingers up to his mouth and blew a sharp whistle. Down by the tents, their two carriage-pullers looked up, saw him beckoning them back, and then started to hitch themselves back up to the coach.

Out in the field, Honour Bound watched Glamerspear wipe her mouth with a hoof scarcely cleaner than what she was wiping. Well, that was two of them covered in muck, now. All things considered, Honour had come out light with just some bruises, dust, and a coat full of mud. Glamerspear was going to need to park herself in the Hobble river for a good, long time to get rid of that.

Now that Glamerspear was done, though, she didn't head for the shore. Instead, she went galloping straight toward the tip of the enormous, smouldering gash that the defeated Lieutenant Kilfeather had torn in the ground. It seemed she took off too fast, too soon, because she was soon hunched over again, giving a little encore performance. But soon she was off again, paying no heed to what her body was trying to tell her. Once she reached Kilfeather, her horn lit up. That was an extraordinarily risky maneuver after what had just happened, but it seemed she was all out of sick for now. And besides, all she did with it was pick up some piece of his armor that had landed a few meters away.

It was his helmet -- completely wrecked, and twisted into an almost unrecognizable form, but the little remaining bit of the decorative brush gave it away. Glamerspear slowly walked back toward the road, holding her prize. For a pony whose face, neck, chest, and hooves were covered in barf, she looked unbelievably pleased with herself.

Honour turned to look at Anonymous, who was looking up at the western sky as he waited for the coach to return.

Just how far up there did Sparkshower and Joker get? Would she even be able to see them from down there?

---

Artemis Sparkshower

---

Specialist Artemis Sparkshower was so close to the clouds she could already feel the mist. But in response, Joker had redoubled his efforts to stop her. Trying to smash her feathers wasn't enough; now he was attacking her wing-arms themselves. But even as he managed to evade her counter-attacks, the fight was not going his way. When he struck at the outer edge of her wings, their relaxed posture meant that he did no damage. When he struck at the base at her wing-shoulders, all he got was a hoof-full of Artemis' armored epaulets.

"Golly-gee, little-filly. We're almost in the clouds, how about that?"

Another slam attack from below was easily deflected by the thick greaves on her forelegs, and Joker went darting off to the side as she poked her spear in his direction.

"... You'd better spit out your name before we get up in there, or else how are we going to play hide-and-seek?"

Joker's frustration was obvious from his voice. And from the manner of his flight, too.

Gone were the big boom-and-zoom attacks. Now he was using short controlled flaps to dodge Sparkshower's spear attacks and get inside her guard. But once he got there, his strikes, no longer backed up by so much momentum, were even more ineffective than before. And, though he'd certainly startled her at first, she was through being terrified by that miscreant scum.

As Joker darted in, and then ducked away from her spear once again before backing off to find a new angle, a loose puff of cloud floated by, giving Artemis pause. If he was no longer a threat, did she even need to hide in the clouds? Wouldn't it be better to invite him to keep up his pointless attacks, and tire him out more quickly?

True, there was the threat to her wings, but so what? Artemis' position in the Royal Guard required her to maintain class 'A' flight skill with a minimum of a level seven endurance rating, and at her last examination she'd beaten that and scored a ten! And an A-10 like her was supposed to be able to make it back to base on just half a wing. What good was Joker's required AAA flight skill doing him now? And his MOS only required level five endurance rating.

She was tired and terrified at the start, trying to gain altitude as quickly as possible, but now, taking things more slowly had left her wing-muscles feeling far more comfortable, despite the sting from the earlier effort.

Meanwhile, Joker was looking pretty ragged. He could still turn on a ten-bit-piece, but only at slow speeds. Joker circle-strafed around in front of her, sizing her up. Even as she watched him warily, spear held close, something else caught her eye behind him.

Something big, and dark, and very puffy. And wet!

That pillar-shaped cumulonimbus cloud was raining over there!

She wouldn't have minded a little shower to cool down right then. As brisk as the air was at that altitude, she had taken off her caparison to avoid damaging it in the fight, and the sun, when it shined through the clouds, really warmed up her armor.

But maybe there was somepony up there with her who could use a taste of what that cloud had to offer as well.

Joker seemed to have given up on his rapid-fire-hits tactics for now; he just continued to circle Artemis threateningly. Was he worn out, or just waiting for a moment to strike? She decided to check which it was, and make a move toward the rain-cloud.

Looking over her shoulder, she could see him following behind her, but it didn't look like he was ready for another attack quite yet.

Maybe this was really it - was he actually tired?

"Oh, are we turning it into a race now, little filly? Alright, I'm game!"

Not so tired that he would stop talking, apparently. Well, maybe that was enough, though! Pumping her wings, she raised the stakes, and her speed.

Time for this nightmare to end!

---

Suggested background music: Cheap Trick - 'Mighty Wings', from 'Top Gun' [1985]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L-4XsDQYDi4

---

Holding her spear close, tip forward, she accelerated toward the towering column before her. Behind her, Joker was close on her tail, wearing a grin. Was he enjoying the thrill of the chase?

‘Good! Get in close, 'Joker', because it's time to show him what a real airborne warrior can do!’

There was a mighty rumble from the cloud before her, like a groan of anticipation. Perhaps sensing that something was not right, Joker started to hang back. Was he afraid to dive into a storm? Some pegasus! Did he never even serve with AWACS, the Airborne Weather And Climate Service? Either way, having him stay back wouldn't suit her plans at all!

Artemis called back over her shoulder. "You want my name, 'Joker'?..."

Flapping her tail like a lure, she held her spear up high.

"... Well, come and get it! ..." Lowering her weapon again, she powered towards the cloud. "... Or are you all build-up and no punch-line?"

That certainly got his attention. He grit his teeth and powered forward after her. "Oh, I'm going to get your name, little filly!"

In just a few seconds, he was right behind her again. "... You want to get to that cloud? Alright, let's go!" Perhaps as an intimidation tactic, he batted at her tail. "... In there, nopony will be able to see what I'm going to do to you, ha-ha-ha!"

'Just keep coming, buster, and you'll get what's coming to you.'

The pillar of thunderous rain loomed closer. It wouldn't be long, now.

Everything depended on making the perfect turn. She gripped her spear tightly and tucked her legs in, reducing her moment of inertia. Another grumble from the storm-cloud, and this time it was deafeningly close. But this time, Joker paid the warning signs no heed, enraged by her taunt. As the first stray puffs of misty clouds start to pass her by, Sparkshower tucked her wings in, reducing her speed.

Her pursuer matched her move, holding back rather than overshooting her. Was it a lingering fear of the storm-cloud? Or was it because he knew he couldn't do a darn thing to her armor? Either way, after she flew through another big poof-ball cloud, breaking his line-of-sight, she suddenly powered forward again.

All she needed was to get a little bit ahead of him...

As soon as he passed through the cloud, he saw the distance she'd opened up. "Oh, so it's stop-and-go tricks in the clouds? I'm gonna come over there and make you scream your name for me!"

‘Now!’

She splayed her wings wide and banked over into a sharp, 180-degree turn to face him.

"My name..."

Seeing his chance to strike at her unprotected face, Joker lunged forward. As she came about, she thrust her spear at him. At the apex of her swing, she let go. Instantly reacting, he swung one of his forehooves to bat away the now-unattended weapon. But just before his sabot connected, he noticed that she'd also kicked out behind her.

And his eyes went wide, his expression turning to horror.

"... is ARTEMIS SPARKSHOWER!"

As her hoof connected with the cloud behind her, his sabot connected with the spear -- The spear whose metal shaft was still poking a solid five hooves into the storm-cloud proper.

Agitated by her kick, the towering column of water and electricity lashed out in anger. And the closest conduit was none other than Joker, thanks to her metal lightning-rod of a weapon. Sparks crackle below her, and she shut her eyes, anticipating what was to come.

There was a furious crash and a deafening thunderclap, both accompanied by a blinding flash of light. When she'd unclenched her eyes, Joker was rocketing backwards away from her, hurtling towards the ground in a flaming fireball.

'Yeah, take that!'

Before it could fall too far, Sparkshower ducked down and grabbed hold of her weapon once more.

'Holy thundershowers, did I just win?!'

"Woooooo!"

---

Honour Bound

---

There was a fireball headed right for the alfalfa field in front of Honour.

Oh, she just prayed that it wasn't Sparkshower.

Just before it crashed into the ground, the flames burned themselves out, and she caught a glimpse of purple.

'That's not Sparkshower.'

Coming in at a forty-five-degree angle, the smoldering remains of Kilfeather's second-in-command slammed into the field before her with a gritty thud, throwing up an enormous plume of dirt, gravel, and greenery.

"That's three for three."

Beside her, the Royal Engineer had traded the massive naval-issue coincidence-rangefinder gunnery binoculars for a simple pair of light reconnaissance ones, and he saw the whole thing with a close-up view. He turned up to the sky, where something golden and shiny was descending after Joker.

"... And here comes Specialist Sparkshower. She appears to be unharmed."

"Awright, nice one, Sparks!"

Behind the corporal, Glamerspear pumped a soggy hoof in the air and crammed another saltine cracker in her mouth. After taking Icepone's helmet as her personal trophy, she'd dived into the Hobble river for a bath, and then raided the supply tents for salty snacks to replenish her electrolytes.

Anonymous walked away from the carriage, heading toward the bridge, and the two of them followed after in a right echelon, leaving Sparkshower's original spot in the 'V' open.

By the time she was standing before the totem, and what remained of the air-defense squadron, Sparkshower had returned with a huge grin on her face, taking up her airborne position.

"Well, gentlecolts, I must say, for my part it's been an honor and a privilege to participate in this ancient Equestrian martial tradition..."

Sullen and shell-shocked faces stared back at him.

"... I'm sure that my retainers feel the same way."

Honour Bound didn't say anything, but behind her on her right, Glamerspear spat out a cracker and piped up. "Yeah! We were in it to win it! By Appointment to Their Majesties Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, Royal Engineer LORD Anonymous and his Equestrian Life Guards!"

Sparkshower chimed in right after her. "Special butt-kicking platoon!"

"Buck yeah! Hoof me, Sparks!"

Honour heard the clanging noise of an armored high-hoof. Followed almost immediately by a muffled 'Ow!' from Glamerspear.

Looks like she forgot the first rule of high-hoofing: never high-hoof somepony wearing heavier sabots than you.

"Now, gentlecolts, I regret to inform you that as much as I'd love to stay and feast the dignified end of this noble hastilude, I'm afraid I have urgent business in Bitsmount, and must bid you adieu. Kindly evacuate the bridge, please."

With glum looks exchanged between them, the still-standing members of the Canterlot First Air Superiority Wing broke into two groups and headed toward their fallen comrades. One of the earth ponies grabbed the totem and dragged it out of the way, while the other took up position at the side of the bridge, raised his spear and stood at attention.

Anonymous turned to Honour. "Corporal Bound, my congratulations and thanks for what you and your squad have accomplished..." Then he started toward the coach. "... But we've wasted enough time here; let's get on with our mission."

"Yes, sir."

Sparkshower and Glamerspear were both beaming.

"Well, specialists? Back to your posts!"

The two of them snapped to parade rest.

"Yes, Corporal!"
"Yes, Corporal!"

Bowing to the majesty of the moment, Honour Bound paused to give a respectful nod to each one in turn. Exchange complete, Sparkshower took back to the air, and Glamerspear scrambled up to her box seat, a cracker-box in her mouth and her trophy-helmet still floating beside her.

Anonymous climbed up into the carriage, and the corporal followed up after him, giving a call out to her draft-ponies as she shut the door.

"Gee-up!"

Although Honour was dusty and bruised, Glamerspear was soaking wet, and Anonymous' trousers were stained with mud, the carriage seemed to pull forward with a dignified grace that it didn't quite have earlier that morning.

Out the window, Bound saw the spear-pony guard still at attention.

One thing was for sure.

After running a gauntlet like this, Bitsmount should be a push-over.

Next Chapter: Chapter 19 Estimated time remaining: 34 Hours, 35 Minutes