Everyday Life With Guardsmares
Chapter 17
Previous Chapter Next ChapterLily Glamerspear
This was the most frustrating fight Glamerspear had ever been in. Every time she relocated, Val seemed to find a new way to ambush her.
Sit in the middle of the field? He'd break her line of sight by climbing up into the clouds, or diving behind a hill, or circling around one of the wooded areas. Then, while she was going crazy trying to re-acquire, he seemed to find the perfect direction to break cover and ambush her from. Again.
If she took up a position at the edge of the field, next to the tree-line, hoping to isolate his approach vectors? Well, then he managed to cut through the forest itself, dodging trees to slam into her shield from behind.
If a bunch of trees wouldn't stop him, how about using a thicket of bushes as cover? He couldn't blow through those, but he still found a way to sneak above or around them to strike.
Regardless of where she took up a firing position, the pattern remained the same: he struck and then retreated. She'd drop shields and launch a volley. He’d dodge the volley and break her line-of-sight. She'd grumble, raise shields, and relocate. He'd manage to figure out exactly where she was, and figure out a new way to sneak up on her.
Wash, rinse, repeat. Not even the Changeling invasion was this infuriating! Granted, the Changelings were a lot more dangerous. There were enough of them that it was actually a serious threat to her shield. With just Val banging on her projected force field, he was clearly playing the long game, hoping to wear her out slowly. Or hoping she would make a mistake, like forgetting to raise it, allowing him to clobber her.
The truth was that all the shooting and shield-swapping was taking a toll on her. Glamerspear's reserves of mana were considerable, but not unlimited. But it was mental frustration, not magical exhaustion, that was really wearing on her right then.
"C'mon, Ice, she's sitting under that tree like a rotten apple full of worms!"
And Val's goon squad wasn't helping.
The only solace she had at the moment was the fact that Honour Bound had clearly won her fight. There'd been a burst of gasps and horrified hooting from the spectator squadron, and then Lily saw Honour Bound stand up without her opponent anywhere in sight. Running these battles simultaneously was still a good idea, but it looked like momentum had a role to play anyway. If she could get even one or two rounds to connect with 'Icepone', things would look even better!
"Wakey-wakey, sleepy-head!"
'Damn it!'
She felt two hooves connect with the top of her shield, which now had the consistency less of a solid brick wall and more of a firm bouncy bubble. A tough bouncy bubble, but still. The bastard actually dove straight down toward her lone tree, and found a path through its branches to strike at her from the one direction she had thought safe!
Aha, but he'd made a mistake!
She was so low to the ground that he couldn't translate that vertical descent into horizontal speed after his attack. He was accelerating away from her, but he'd started from almost a complete stop.
It was the perfect time to strike.
She took her time to line up the shot, then fired a satisfyingly long eight-round burst.
Keeping him in sight, she watched her bolts travel towards him. Time seemed to slow down as they hurtled forward.
‘Come on, come on…’
It didn't even look like he'd be able to dodge them!
But just as they were closing in, Val suddenly rolled his body toward her and swiped out with his right forehoof.
Glamerspear's jaw dropped. He batted the spear-tips away with his sabot -- the ultimate humiliation.
Val gave her a cheeky salute. "You tossing garbage my way, Lily-baby? Try harder next time!"
'HOW!?'
Oh, buck, she'd forgotten to drop her shield before firing! The bucking thing had interfered with her own shots, slowing them down so that he didn't even have to dodge! That bucked-up bucking bucker bucked her bucking bullets!
Seething, she looked for a new hiding-place.
She had to get her head screwed on straight again, or else she'd keep making mistakes like that.
And then he'd really have her.
Which would put everything on Sparkshower.
Lily wouldn’t say she couldn't do it, but she'd rather not put her in that position. Besides, those bucking bastards deserved to be cleanly swept by her crew!
Artemis Sparkshower
Right then, all Sparkshower could feel was the pulsing sound of her own heart pounding. Calculating that she was going to limit her counter-attacks, Joker had started to repeatedly attack her from above, never quite striking long enough or hard enough that he would be forced to stay in her reach.
Still, she couldn't let his attacks go unchallenged. And since she didn't know when, if ever, he was going to come in long enough to give her the chance to make a counter-strike, she had decided to be proactive. That meant using alternating banked turns to climb, and working her longspear for all it was worth, thrusting and slicing whenever Joker approached. She was keeping him at bay, and she'd nearly reached the cloud cover, but the effort had been exhausting.
"Ooh, we're getting awfully close to those nasty-looking clouds now, aren't we? But don't worry, I'll make sure we don't reach them!"
At least dodging the considerable reach of her weapon had kept him mostly quiet until now. Beside the inevitable laughter and giggle every time he got a blow in, or narrowly avoided her own, of course. Twisting her head around as she changed tack to a left bank, Sparkshower craned her neck back to see what was coming next.
This time, he was opting to attack from outside her bank.
She readied her spear against his charge.
But instead of striking her armor and tasting her spear, he dived low underneath her. It was all she could do to just relax her muscles as he blew through her lower wing, dislodging a few feathers as he went. All his strike really accomplished was interrupting her banked turn and dropping her a few hooves down.
But attacking a fellow pegasus' wing, in a formal duel? That was beyond the pale, especially for a distinguished member of the Royal Guard! Or, perhaps it was just an honest mistake? Maybe he dived only to avoid her spear at the last moment?
"What's the matter, filly? Everypony knows that dragons don't have feathers, ha-ha-hee!"
‘He was serious!’
After all the terror he'd caused her, was this fight just one big joke to him? As he circled around, Sparkshower banked over again to the right, keeping her thickly-armored back to him. In Cloudsdale, deliberately attacking a wing was grounds to immediately halt a duel with a loss to the instigator. But they were so far up and away from everypony on the ground it was doubtful that any of them would have seen that.
Except maybe Glamerspear, with her fancy magnifying optics.
If she was even looking their way.
Which she probably wasn't.
No, it was just herself, all alone up there with this... this... this miserable, dishonorable, shameful excuse for a Guardspony!
She found that her fear of facing a formidable foe had been replaced with something else.
Righteous anger.
Glamerspear was right; Valiant and his squadron were just a bunch of uncivilized thugs!
Well, she knew just how to deal with that.
It would mean taking even longer to reach the cloud cover, but by making sure to hold her wings lightly when he moved in to strike, she could avoid him doing any serious damage. Tucking them in would be even better, but Joker moved so quickly that it would be too risky a proposition. If she tucked them in too early, she'd lose more altitude. If she tucked them in too late, her muscles would still be taut when he struck, and he might actually injure her. No, keeping them loose was the best way to approach the engagement.
And although Joker was sinking to despicable means, perhaps it was a good sign, after all. After all, it was just as Drill Sergeant Mareline Tandem had taught her, way back in Pegasus Individual Armour Training:
'When an enemy decides to attack your wings, it's because they have given up trying to penetrate your armor.'
Did that mean Joker was starting to give up?
She sure hoped so.
Honour Bound
Honour Bound was presently watching Specialist Glamerspear fail.
"What's wrong, Corporal?"
She shook her head. "It's Glamerspear, sir. I should have known this would happen."
Beside her, the Royal Engineer was watching the air-versus-anti-air duel with concern. "I can see that things don't seem to be going her way, but could you explain to me why?"
She turned up to face him. "Specialist Glamerspear is used to working in a battery, sir. Her helmet doesn't have the magnification needed to keep track of Lieutenant Kilfeather beyond her maximum firing range."
There was more shouting from in front of her, so she looked away from her VIP.
"... And all that galloping around she's doing is pointless, though I can see why she thinks she has to do it."
Out in the field, Glamerspear sent another failed volley after a retreating 'Icepone'.
"... She needs somepony who can keep eyes on target, to call it out, and to tell her when to shield and when to fire."
Over at the bridge, the peanut gallery chimed in on the latest exchange.
"Glam keeps throwing out the spam!"
"Yeah, except this meat's gone rotten, haw-haw!"
"Go, Ice! Dodge that trash!"
Squinting as she watched Lieutenant Kilfeather make his way off into the distance once more, Honour barely noticed Anonymous' footsteps as he walked away from her. In ten seconds, the pegasus was completely beyond visual range. It was almost impressive that Glamerspear had been holding it together so far. In her place, Honour would probably be going nuts by now.
"Excuse me, gentlecolts!"
Over by the bridge, Anonymous spoke out loudly, and the remainder of Valiant's squadron all turned to face him.
She hoped he wasn't about to provoke something foolish.
"... May I take it from your behavior that providing verbal support to the duelists is within the rules?"
Most of the pegasi, and both of the earth ponies, looked like they barely understood what he meant. The rest wore a look of disgust.
'Applewood', the one with a mustache, shot a glance to his compatriots before speaking up. "Yeah, sure, 'm'lord'. You go ahead and provide all the 'verbal support' you want."
Anonymous tipped his top hat. "Capital, gentlecolts; my thanks."
He was walking back Honour's way. Strange. Did the Royal Engineer expect to form a two-pony rival cheer-leading team for Glamerspear? Additional distracting voices were probably the last thing she needed right then.
Anonymous pointed at her as he gingerly made his way down the embankment, heading towards the tents. "Corporal, tell Glamerspear to set up a firing position as close as possible to the road here, and order her to stay put."
That's when she realized that he wasn't heading for the tents, he was headed for the carriage. Maybe he had something back there to help out?
Glamerspear had her shield back up again and was looking around for a new place to set up.
"Specialist! Hey, Specialist!"
Could she not hear Honour under that fancy helmet of hers?
"SPECIALIST GLAMERSPEAR!" The unicorn's head swiveled around to her, and she started trotting her way. Pointing one hoof at the nearest little peak in the fallow farmer's field, Honour cupped the other one to her mouth. "Set up on that hill and await further instructions!"
Glamerspear nodded, and broke into a gallop towards the indicated position.
OK, so that was step one.
Over at the carriage, Anonymous was hunched over the luggage-box at the back of the coach, digging through the various surveying equipment the two of them had hunted for almost all day yesterday. As Glamerspear took up her post, her shield raised, she looked over at the corporal, expectantly.
She couldn’t offer anything more but to hold up a hoof as a sign for her to wait.
At last, she could see Anonymous trotting back towards her, a large, heavy-looking metal object slung over his shoulder.
It was a pair of enormously large, strange-looking brass binoculars. She remembered that device; it was one of the most troublesome items to acquire yesterday. What was it called again?
Honour gave it some thought. ‘Something about 'range...'’
‘A 'Coincidence Rangefinder,'’ that's what it was.
Recalling her discussions with the Royal Engineer, she remembered that it was some kind of device for determining how far any object was, even if its size wasn't known. All she really knew was that he had spotted it in a supply catalogue, he had insisted that a pair be lent to him. The palace depot commander had tried to stonewall him, saying it was an extremely precious piece of equipment, normally used only on boats, and that they didn't stock such items in the palace anyway. Her VIP hadn't relented, looming over the commander and waving Celestia's writ. In the end, two of the depot underlings had wound up having to gallop halfway out of the city, all the way down to the riverside naval depot, to get it for him.
At the time, Honour Bound hadn't asked what it was for, since Anonymous had sent her to collect a few items from the palace warehouse shelves personally. Right then, all she could tell was that it looked very, very heavy, watching as Anonymous struggled up the hill to come up beside her.
"Wasn't there a tripod with that, sir?"
"Yes, but I'm too tall for it, and anyways the mount was designed for naval gunnery and won't allow me to look straight up." Hefting the huge thing off of his shoulder, he gently placed it down on the ground and crouched low to get a solid grip.
"... Let me know if you see him before me, Corporal."
Both of them started to scan the sky, searching for Lieutenant Kilfeather. And Glamerspear was out there searching for him, too.
His last two strikes were from down low, and he'd escaped from down low last time as well. Something told her that next time, he'd be using the cloud cover.
That's when she spotted him.
"There, sir, two o'clock, very high!"
He followed her hoof to where Icepone was coming in for another attack run. At that distance, he was on Glamerspear in seconds, crashing into her shield while she was looking the other way completely.
Anonymous stood up again with the enormous device in his hands. He had to swing his arms just to bring it up to his eyes, and Bound saw him lean back from the weight of it, grunting with the effort. She doubted he'd be able to hold it very steady, or for very long. There was a ticking noise while he twisted a ring on the right barrel, following Kilfeather's retreat up into the sky. Eventually, the pegasus was completely out of her sight, although Anonymous still seemed to be following him.
The seconds stretched out as she waited for the next step.
That's when Anonymous bellowed out a command in a voice louder than all the drill sergeants at Fort Horseshoe Bend put together.
"THREE, TARGET PEGASUS, SEVEN O'CLOCK HIGH, RANGE: FIFTEEN HUNDRED METERS, STEADY LEFT!"
Glamerspear turned to face them both, and the look on her face was one of utter confusion.
Suggested background music: Jan Dusek and Varhan Orchestrovič Bauer - 'This is War', from 'ArmA 3: Malden' [2017]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JgHATY3SDg0
The corporal shot her an angry glare and pointed North with one hoof, then swept out seven o'clock with the second. Glamerspear seemed to get it, reorienting her body with the polar axis and scanning the sky behind her for her target.
"TARGET: SIX O'CLOCK HIGH, RANGE: THIRTEEN HUNDRED METRES, APPROACHING LEFT!"
Kilfeather was still way beyond visual range, but Glamerspear still had her shield up.
"Sir, you'll want her to lower her shields until he gets too close."
He bellowed again. "SHIELDS DOWN!"
Out in the field, the unicorn's shield instantly dropped.
"FIVE O'CLOCK MEDIUM, TWELVE HUNDRED METERS, DESCENDING APPROACHING LEFT!"
Honour heard the Royal Engineer grunt as he took a step to rotate in place. With a deep breath, he rolled his shoulders and tried to brace himself.
"FOUR O'CLOCK MEDIUM, RANGE ELEVEN HUNDRED, DESCENDING STEADY LEFT!"
"Naw, naw, EIGHT O'CLOCK, yeah! EIGHT O'CLOCK, RANGE: YOUR BUTT!"
"Six o'clock!"
"Twelve o'clock!"
Over at the bridge, the rest of Kilfeather's squadron had cottoned on to what the Royal Engineer was doing, and were trying to run interference. They were loud, but even if they all worked together as a chorus, Honour Bound doubted they could match the lungs of the Royal Engineer.
"THREE O'CLOCK LOW, RANGE ONE THOUSAND, ASCENDING APPROACHING LEFT!"
This must be it; he was on the deck at a thousand meters and popping up to gain some elevation before the final dive.
As loud as Anonymous was, there was no way Kilfeather should have any idea he'd been spotted. When he got a little closer, maybe he'd even think he'd hit the jackpot, what with Glamerspear's shield being down.
"TWO O'CLOCK MEDIUM, RANGE NINE HUNDRED, APPROACHING LEFT!"
That announcement was followed by another groan. Anonymous' arms were starting to shake under the weight. But it looked like Glamerspear had spotted her target, as she’d turned to face the Lieutenant. There was something funny going on above her head, though. Where there should have been three or four waiting magical spear-tips, Honour could see twenty.
And more were popping in to join them.
‘Is she all right?’
Lily Glamerspear
"ONE O'CLOCK MEDIUM, RANGE EIGHT HUNDRED, APPROACHING LEFT!"
How in Equestria could one creature be so loud?
Glamerspear wasn't so much hearing the Royal Engineer as she was feeling his voice somehow echo inside her skull. Some kind of magic?
Either way, thanks to him and those goofy big binoculars, she was finally drawing a bead on Kilfeather on his way in. At this range, he was still little more than a speck, but a speck that was getting bigger by the second.
This was it, he was trying for a medium entry into a dive, circling around where he thought she didn't see him.
A three-round burst wouldn't be enough.
Four rounds wouldn’t do, either.
Even five was just too few.
There wouldn't be any targets after this one, so she broke the normal rules of engagement and poured every drop of energy she had left into her next volley. It had to be one, single, glorious alpha strike to end the fight in one fell blow.
"TWO O'CLOCK MEDIUM, RANGE SEVEN HUNDRED, APPROACHING RIGHT!"
Five hundred meters was her maximum effective range. Should she fire when he hit the limit? Or take a chance and wait until he was closer and it would be even harder for him to dodge? He could close a hundred meters in the blink of an eye.
She settled on four hundred -- at that range, he'd just barely have gotten a decent look at her, while he'd be a decent target in her optics. Meanwhile, for ammunition, all she could think was 'more, more, more,' loading up spear after spear. She didn't even want to look up; there were probably thirty or more rounds up there ready to go. She felt her sweat pooling in her coat.
"THREE O'CLOCK MEDIUM, RANGE SIX HUNDRED, APPROACHING STRAIGHT!"
'Any second now...'
Her breathing became labored as her vision started to blur. She blinked rapidly to clear the haze, but it didn't go away. And the haze was... purple!
'Oh, buck, are you manaburning yourself?'
"FIVE-FIFTY!!"
'Wait... just how many rounds did I load?'
She did not dare break eye contact with her target for even a second. But she started to feel a crushing weight on her back.
"FIVE HUNDRED!"
The physical consequences of severely overloading her horn didn't matter now. She would deal with the manaburn blowback after she got this shot off.
"FOUR HUNDRED!"
"FEEL THE WRATH OF A CENTURION OF THE RAM!"
Required watching: Centurion C-RAM engages mortar on test range; go full-screen and fast-forward to 0:40
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XFPxbZ7lLc4&t=40s
In her magnified targeting view, Glamerspear watched what must have been thousands of spear-tips go hurling toward Kilfeather. She was completely deafened by the effect, and could feel her stomach turning from the manaburn recoil.
'Oh, I am going to feel bad in a second or two.'
But probably not as bad as Valiant felt right then. Hundreds of rounds flew past him, but hundreds more thundered home, crashing into his body and armor. In the blink of an eye, his sabots were pounded straight off of his hooves. He barely got his forelegs up in time to cover his face, before his criniere was shredded and his helmet went tumbling off.
Meanwhile, what had once been a magnificent pair of feathered wings had been reduced to nothing more than two fleshy stalks and a white puff of smoke.
More telekinetic rounds sliced up the straps of his pectoral piece and sent it hurtling off behind him.
Then it was the sheer weight of all those spear-tips, blunted by the protective field of the MXP totem, that sent him into an involuntary, sideways spin through their cumulative impacts. The tail end of the biggest anti-air barrage Equestria had ever seen slammed into his left flank, utterly destroying his flanchard armor.
Something desperately wanted to escape from Lily's insides. She swallowed it back down to see things out.
It only took a few seconds for Valiant 'Icepone' Kilfeather to drop to the ground, and he went down hard. What little remained of his armor plating went careening off as he tumbled sideways through the field, like a barrel flung off of Canterlot's highest peak.
Finally, he came to a stop, and he didn't get up.
'YES!! Got you, you sucker!'
She tasted bile in her mouth.
‘...Uh-oh.’
Lily’s friend from down below had started knocking again, and she keeled over forward.
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