It was good to be back. Even that eyesore of a castle didn’t look like so much of an eyesore to Duskfall’s eyes. According to The Doctor, it had only been three days since her initial freak out. To Duskfall, it had been over 350 years ago. She could remember it like it was yesterday. She could hardly believe she had acted so childishly. Insanity was a fine wine you sipped, not some bottom dollar beer you guzzled from the tap.

Well, Duskfall wasn’t back just to wax philosophical. She hadn’t seen her friends in far too long. Yes, Duskfall could finally admit they were her friends just as much as they were Tom and Twilight’s. She didn’t quite grasp the why yet, but that was unimportant in the grand scheme of things. Now the question was how to go about gathering everyone?

The question was quickly answered by a small Alicorn popping into existence in front of Duskfall and pulling her through a second teleport back to the map room.

“Hello, Harmonia,” A name that hadn’t passed her lips in centuries still slipped from her as naturally as breathing. Harmonia turned to face Duskfall, a host of emotions playing across the Greater Spirit’s face. Finally the smaller Alicorn marched forward and planted her head against Duskfall’s chest.

“Stupid, stupid Duskfall,” Duskfall could feel a few hot tears sliding down her coat.

“So you know?” Duskfall asked quietly.

“I found and broke down your spell after you left with The Doctor…” Harmonia replied.

“Are you going to stop me?” Duskfall inquired calmly.

“The Weave is a mess. I cannot see anything past the Winter Solstice. Even if I did want to stop you, none of us could. I will save us all the struggle and heartache. I will keep your secret, Duskfall Sparkle, even if it ruins you,” Harmonia answered sadly.

“Thank you,” Duskfall said gratefully, “Now, I would really like to see our friends again, so if I could bother you to summon them?” A pulse of Magic answered Duskfall’s request. Harmonia left the room to greet the incoming.

A few minutes later, once everyone was gathered, Harmonia let them all into the map room.

“DUSKFALL!” The purple Alicorn found herself in a not unexpected group hug from all her friends. She was content to remain that way for as long as they wanted. Several minutes of warm embrace passed, and eventually they all let go.

“Hello, everyone. I’m sorry I worried you. Especially you, Anwyn, you walked in on me at a bad time and I reacted poorly,” Duskfall apologized.

“Pfft, what are you talking about? I wasn’t worried!” Rainbow tried to deny, but her body language betrayed her. Even now she was hovering closer to Duskfall than was strictly polite and visibly trying to not reach out and touch the Alicorn, just to make sure she was real.

“Rainbow, if you keep acting like a tsundere, I’m going to have no choice but to kiss you~!” Duskfall teasingly threatened. Rainbow instantly bolted to the other end of the room.

“You wouldn’t dare!” Rainbow’s face was blushing and her wings were noticeably stiffer. Duskfall had to fight to keep her smile to normal proportions.

“Why wouldn’t I want to kiss a super adorable mare like you?” Duskfall knew her gaze had turned predatory. She forced herself to turn off the flirting before Rainbow exploded. Teasing your tsundere was all well and good, but you had to be careful, lest they overheat. Even if Prisma was laughing her ass off at her doppelganger's misfortune.

“Where have you been?” Lyra asked in an attempt to save Dash. Something was very different about Duskfall, and it wasn’t just her casual flirting. It took Lyra a second to put her hoof on it, but she soon realized that there was a feeling of contentment coming off of Duskfall that had been utterly missing before.

“The Doctor was kind enough to take me on a bit of a journey of self-discovery,” Duskfall casually made to walk towards the throne with Twilight’s Cutie Mark on it, giving the whole room a good look at her flanks.

“You’ve got your Cutie Mark!” The room once again exclaimed as one. Duskfall looked back at her flank in faux-surprise.

“Really? When did that get there?” Duskfall decided to be intentionally hammy in her delivery.

“If The Doctor took you then...?” Bonnie started to ask.

“Yes, I was gone significantly longer than three days. Getting my Cutie Mark was actually what made me decide I was ready to come home,” Duskfall confessed.

“I’ve never seen a Cutie Mark like yours,” Fluttershy observed.

Duskfall’s Cutie Mark was broken into parts. First, there was a large black ring. Well, saying it was black would be like saying the sun was warm. The ring seemed to simply devourer all light that approached it. Inside the ring sat a heart shape with a flur-de-lis at the bottom outlined in red. The shape itself was also black, but not to the intensity of the ring. Finally, in the middle of the heart, was a strange shape that felt ever so slightly wrong to look at. It bore a resemblance to a triangle, but no triangle on Equestria had ever looked like that.

“It’s been eons since I’ve seen a Penrose Triangle…” Discord mused, “Even I’m not sure what your Cutie Mark could possibly mean.” He didn’t like admitting that. Duskfall just smiled mysteriously.

“Sorry, for now all the nitty gritty is going to have to stay top secret. Don’t worry, Luna, I’m not going to swarm Equestria. I’m not even sure they’d listen to me at the moment. As I said, I only got my Cutie Mark very recently. Less than a full day, actually,” Everyone except Luna, Discord, Harmonia, and the humans plus Sunset were confused as to what Duskfall could possibly be talking about.

“Less than a day?!” Sakura shouted, “That means I can plan your cute-ceañera! This is gonna be AMAZING!”

“Oh, I am definitely going to look forward to a Pinkie Party,” Duskfall replied happily.

“Um, how long were you away?” Fluttershy asked.

“How could that knowledge possibly benefit you?” Duskfall returned warily.

“And what purpose would you have in hiding it?” Luna shot back.

“I’m not trying to hide it…I just don’t think you’ll like the answer is all,” Duskfall shrugged.

“I think we should be able to decide that for ourselves,” Chrysalis said mildly. Duskfall sighed in defeat.

“Very well, I’ve been gone for just over 350 years,” Predictably, the room entered a state of shock.

“Why would you leave for 350 years?” Anwyn asked numbly.

“It took you 350 years to get your Cutie Mark?!” Rainbow exclaimed, earning a bunch of dirty looks from the others.

“The circumstances behind the duration of my…sabbatical are private and that is something I am not negotiating on. The only ones who I might tell are Luna and Chrysalis, but not until they are sworn to secrecy. Please, I don’t want to fight just after I got back. Can we drop it?” Duskfall begged.

“Of course. Today should be a happy day of reunion. I apologize for pressuring you,” Luna replied.

“So let’s party!” Sakura pulled out a party cannon from Pink Space and fired it off.

“I wanted to apologize to you again, Anwyn. What happened wasn’t your fault,” Duskfall told the Unicorn quietly during the party.

“What did happen?” Anwyn asked.

“When I’m stressed I like to sing. I usually sing one or two happy songs and one or two dark songs. Since I had the castle to myself that day, I just decided to devote the whole day to singing. Obviously, you caught me during a dark stretch. You’re a bright mare, I’m sure you noticed my mental state wasn’t exactly rock solid. So when you found me trying to detox, it shattered what little composure I had. I didn’t stay away because of anything you did. I stayed away because of what I might do,” Duskfall answered.

“That’s all I’m going to get out of you, isn’t it?” Anwyn asked with a touch of melancholy in her tone.

“At least until you become an Alicorn with a few centuries under your belt,” Duskfall agreed.

“I might just look into that, just to know everything. If you were hurting so badly you needed more than three centuries just so you could tolerate being around ponies again, you clearly need to at least talk about it. A burden shared is a burden halved, after all,” Anwyn was actually being serious. Sure, being an Alicorn was a fanciful idea in and of itself, but if devoting the time and effort would help a friend…

“Anwyn, I appreciate the thought, but if you do decide to try for Alicornhood, then please be careful,” Duskfall nearly begged.

“You almost make it sound like doing so would be dangerous,” Anwyn noted.

“I can fully admit this is me being paranoid and my experiences are in no way indicative of what most ponies would go through, but just because you expect to be an Alicorn of something, doesn’t mean that’s what you’ll be an Alicorn of,” Duskfall explained.

“I’m not entirely sure what you’re getting at, Duskfall,” Anwyn confessed.

“OK, well, Twilight was an Alicorn of Magic under the categorization of Friendship. Tom was going to be an Alicorn of Magic, even if they weren’t sure what aspect of Magic he was going to be an Alicorn of. You’d think I, being a fusion of both of them, would wind up as an Alicorn of Magic too. Tell me, Anwyn, does this Cutie Mark look like it belongs to an Alicorn of Magic?” Duskfall asked, motioning to her Cutie Mark.

“Maybe an Alicorn of Dark Magic…” Anwyn trailed off at the arched eyebrow Duskfall was leveling at her, “No, I suppose it doesn’t.”

“Becoming an Alicorn, even through such unusual methods that I was created, means a core part of your being is laid bare and brought to the surface. It defines something about you, much more than any Cutie Mark could hope to do. I spent literally centuries fighting against my core nature. I just don’t want you to go through that, even if the chances of that are vanishingly small,” Duskfall explained.

“I’m flattered that you think there’s enough of a chance for me to become an Alicorn that you’re worried about this,” Anwyn giggled.

“I expressly wiped my memories any time I heard something that might be related to any of my friends. So I don’t know for certain what happened to you all in the future. You might have become an Alicorn for all I know. It wouldn’t surprise me in the slightest to learn that the use of the Elements have granted you, if not full immortality like Alicorns enjoy, then at least eternal youth. I mean, if the Elements helped propel Twilight into Alicornhood, then who’s to say the rest of the Bearers can’t use them to similar effect,” Duskfall mused. This wasn’t the first time such thoughts had entered her head.

“I had not considered that,” Anwyn turned the idea over in her head. Everyone has had some dream of eternal youth and beauty, but even ignoring the mare right in front of her, Luna and Chrysalis were clear indications that long lives came with some definite drawbacks.

“I do not wish to sound insensitive, but why is such a cursed emblem a part of your Cutie Mark?” Luna finally asked the question. Duskfall had to keep from snickering to herself. She also had to bite her tongue to keep from saying the first thing that popped into her head. Luna and/or Chrysalis might very well send her to the moon if she started shamelessly flirting. Being insulted and degraded, even unintentionally, was still a massive turn on for Duskfall.

“This particular variation isn’t a cursed emblem, as you put it. It carries some of the same ideas, but with more of a thinking, feeling force behind it as opposed to the pure, emotionless instinct the mark you’re thinking of represents,” Duskfall answered, “And like I said, I literally got this Mark yesterday. I don’t know if I can even control the Heartless or if this is more a representation of general Darkness in a symbol I know and understand.”

“You raise a fair point, Duskfall. Still, you seem to be fairly confident you know at least some of the details of your Cutie Mark,” Luna noted.

“And I am,” Duskfall readily agreed, “I’m pretty sure the Heartless Emblem represents my connection to so called ‘Wild’ Darkness. The primordial Darkness from which all Life sprang and to which all Life will ultimately return. The ring is the Healing Darkness, that which soothes and protects the Soul, usually with the power of Sleep.”

“And that bizarre triangle?” Luna asked.

“That I’m not ready to share. I will do so, eventually, probably after it has bitten me in the ass, but until then, please just leave it alone,” Duskfall requested.

“Very well, I will control my curiosity on this subject. I am, however, strongly considering taking that vow of silence to find out why my sister thought it needful for you to take a 350 year vacation from Equuis,” Luna admitted.

“Celestia, The Doctor, and Starswirl all have one thing in common. They like to put things in boxes and hope the problem fixes itself, without directly intervening. Sirens? Throw those in the alternate dimension box. Renegade Time Lords? Throw them into a vault until they prove they can kinda sorta maybe be trusted. Semi-feral dragon taking up residence too close to Ponyville? Throw that in the ‘Shit for Twilight Sparkle to fix’ box. I’m not bitter or anything. Heck, I quite enjoyed my ‘vacation’ for the most part. But it is a pattern of behavior that sometimes spectacularly backfires. I just don’t want you to look too poorly on Celestia for what I forced her to do. I made her deal with a problem and she dealt with it in one of the ways she knows how,” Duskfall shrugged.

“You don’t get to be as old as I am without learning a thing or two about euphemisms. You say ‘vacation’ where most would say ‘exile’. I have traveled a time or two with The Doctor myself. The experiences are fun, yet often terrifying. I would never refer to them as ‘vacations’ even as a joke or euphemism and to travel with him for 350 years? I can’t help but wonder if you weren’t just dumped on some world for some reason,” Luna speculated.

“You are far too intuitive for your own good, Luna,” Duskfall complained, “Yes, I was dropped off on a fairly isolated world for more than three centuries. That’s all I’m telling you without that vow.”

“And you will have it sooner rather than later. However, that does bring up another question. Why have you not grown into your full Alicorn stature?” Luna questioned.

“This is just a guess, but I think I didn’t change because I hadn’t yet acquired my Cutie Mark. Without that tying my Magic together, I simply didn’t grow,” And that was even mostly the truth, based on Duskfall’s research. Killing herself and/or being murdered, sometimes multiple times a day, resetting her biologically also probably had something to do with it, but Luna didn’t need to know that just yet.

Although, to be honest, Duskfall was planing on just using transformation magic to remain close to her current size and shape. As much as Celestia might be viewed by many as the 'perfection of beauty', Duskfall had absolutely no desire to look anything like her. Especially given the alabaster Alicorn had confessed to finding her own size to be a point of frustration. Being so much larger than the majority of your subjects made one very much an outcast, even if that outcasting was just the isolation of a pedestal. That just wasn't Duskfall's thing.

“Moon Dancer, I’m just gonna come out and say it. I missed you quite a lot during my time away,” Duskfall said happily.

“That’s nice, but I’m not fucking you,” Moon Dancer had such a good poker face, Duskfall couldn’t tell if she was joking or not.

“I’m getting a feeling you’re upset with me,” Duskfall observed.

“Yes, I am very upset with you. Tom and Twilight saved me from my depression. You continued to offer that same kindness even when your own life was crumbling around you. I just…I wish you had been able to talk with me,” Moon Dancer said sadly.

“Moon Dancer, I’m glad you wanted to help me, but stewing in each other’s Darkness wouldn’t have been healthy for either of us. If we drove each other to suicide, I would’ve died and come back. You would’ve stayed dead. I know a burden shared is a burden halved, but neither of us was healthy enough to take any kind of burden in the first place. Do you understand what I’m trying to say?” Duskfall asked gently.

“Yeah, I do, even if I don’t want to,” Moon Dancer sighed.

“Hey, we can still share angsty poetry if you like,” Duskfall teased. Moon Dancer just gave her the stink eye.

“Hello, Sunny, I take it you’re not happy with me either?” Duskfall slid up next to Sunset Shimmer.

“You said you would confide in me,” Sunset huffed.

“I actually never said any such thing,” Duskfall continued before the glare Sunset leveled at her could melt her face off, “I did confide in you, a little bit, and you were a large part as to why, when I did explode, it wasn’t nearly as bad as it could have been.”

“‘Not as bad as it could have been’?” Sunset asked skeptically.

“Yes, I could have easily traumatized many people for life. As it is I’m pretty sure I still traumatized Raven. Actually, that reminds me, I need to find a way to make it up to Raven…” Duskfall trailed off as she started thinking of things she could do for the poor Unicorn who had suffered through her initial bout of Insanity.

“So the reason part of your Cutie Mark is the Heartless symbol?” Sunset asked.

“Riku fangirl,” Duskfall quipped.

“Fuck you, I bet you get wet for Aqua,” Sunset stuck her tongue out.

“Oh, water pun for the water named girl. How clever of you. Also yes, but I wouldn’t mind letting Larxene step on me either,” Duskfall countered. Both mares started snickering.

“You might as well gather up all the other human girls. I’m sure most, if not all of them, have the same question you do,” So Duskfall waited for the human 5 to be rounded up.

“OK, I’m sure you’re all wondering why I have the Heartless Symbol on my butt. Do you all know what Cutie Marks are?” Duskfall asked, just to be sure.

“Yeah, we know all about that special talent mumbo jumbo,” Prisma said dismissively.

“Even if it is strange we humans have the same icons, even if we don’t have any reason to,” Fluttershy noted.

“Right, well, I’m not here to get into any more existential crises. I reserve the right to not deal with those for at least a century after what happened. Anyway, I’m sure at least one or two of you recognizes this particular variation of the Heartless Symbol,” Everyone, even Rarity nodded their heads, “Alright, so to put this simply, I am a wielder of Darkness in a similar vein to Riku. Only difference is I don’t get retconned to be afraid of my own Darkness whenever the plot demands it. Although, truthfully, I suspect the kind of Darkness I use is very different to the one he uses.”

“Oh, oh, does this mean you’re gonna have a Dive to the Heart?!” Pinkie asked excitedly.

“I certainly hope so. Being a Keyblade wielder would be super badass,” Duskfall grinned.

“And then you could perform the Inheritance Ceremony on us!” Prisma buzzed her wings with glee at the idea.

“You do realize that, even on the off chance I do get a Keyblade, a different Keyblade would still have to select you as a worthy wielder. That’s without getting into any of the host of different head canons that could dictate circumstances of the Ceremony,” Duskfall noted, “I mean, Riku’s Keyblade getting passed on to Sora doesn’t make a lick of sense, if it was just a matter of Riku falling to Darkness, then why the heck does Xehanort have a Keyblade and what about-”

“OK, we get the picture. You’re a massive nerd,” Sunset interrupted with a cheeky smirk.

“Because I know for a fact that you, Sunset Shimmer, someone who has a hunger for knowledge at least as great as Twilight’s, has never once tried to logic their way out of the mess that is the Kingdom Hearts lore,” Duskfall snarked.

“Busted,” Sunset admitted.

“I just like looking at the cute monster designs,” Artemis put in.

“And you totally aren’t crushing on Sora, Ven, or Vanitas, are you,” Prisma ribbed. Artemis just turned red.

“No one has ever accused Square of not being able to design some very good looking men and women,” Duskfall noted idly, “On the presumption they inspire the alternate universes and the alternate universes don’t inspire Square’s artists somehow…or the infinite monkey theorem is in play.”

“Alright, mah curiosity is satisfied. I don’t need ya’ll makin’ me feel like a backwards hillbilly with yer fancy theories and whatnot,” Applejack cracked a self-depreciating smile.

“Aw, so you won’t be marching an army of Heartless to conquer your enemies?” Pinkie sounded disappointed.

“Again, I have no clue if they’d even listen to me. Commanding a whole horde is something for the far flung future, if it happens at all,” Although Duskfall couldn’t deny wanting to keep a Shadow as a pet.

The party was winding down and it was just about time for everyone to return home. However, Sakura had one final announcement.

“Before I forget, Matilda and Cranky are going to have their wedding in a few days! Look forward to that!” Sakura looked like she was about to explode from sheer joy. A wedding was, of course, a joyous occasion. Except for the part where you had to pull a wedding gift out of your ass for people you don’t know all that well…Duskfall didn’t want to buy them cookware, but that might be what ended up happening.

Author's Notes:

OK, a couple of things.

1.) I am unreasonably upset that the moderators still haven't approved The Road to Healing. I really wanted to have that go live before posting this chapter.

2.) I have found some small reason to live again. A random Youtube video popped up in my feed from a channel I'd never heard of, as you do. I clicked on it and well... let's just say stupid people being unironically stupid is quite amusing to me. That's all I'll say because I don't want a political shitstorm in my comments section.

3.) I have an unhealthy love for making Dives To The Heart. As in, I have like 10 different variations on the three choices offered at the beginning of the Dive. If I give Duskfall a Dive to the Heart and you thought I was going to use the boring old sword/shield/staff, then you clearly don't know me very well.

4.) Duskfall's Cutie Mark. I hope I described it well enough to get the picture. As I've said, I have no ability for art. If someone wants to draw it for me...
The exact meaning behind Duskfall's Mark will be reveled at a later date, at least what I haven't already revealed in this chapter.

5.) The kinds of Darkness my sleep deprived brain can think of right now

Wild Darkness

Healing Darkness

Sleeping Darkness

Chaotic Darkness

Tamed Darkness

Corrupted Darkness

Darkness of Evil

Darkness of the Void

Darkness of Insanity

I think that's all of them, but again, I haven't slept in 36 hours again, so my brain is bye bye.