My Little Pony: Friendship is Magicka

EDIT: Thank you anonymous person for suggesting a better name! This is a crossover with the awesome indie game Magicka.

For those who are interested, Magicka can be bought off Valve's product distribution system, STEAM, for the PC, for $10. I suspect it is also available for a similar price off Xbox Live Arcade.

This story does not abide to the actual story of Magicka.

I do not own My Little Pony: Friendship Is Magic or Magicka. Those belong to Hasbro, Paradox Interactive and Arrowhead Studios.

Jordan Lucky

Enjoy!~

Chapter 1: Briefing

Twilight Sparkle was simply reading a book in her study, a rather dirty book that Rarity told her to read, attempting to comprehend its meaning. After a few chapters and the first sex scene, she slammed the book closed and put it in a hard-to-reach place in her library, an enormous blush dominating her face. Spike, her baby dragon, walked up to her, concerned.

"Twilight, are you okay?" He asked. The purple mare simply stared up at him from her curled-up position on the floor. "Twi-" Spike belched out a green flame mid-sentence, making a letter appear, no doubt from Princess Celestia. Twilight grabbed it out of the air and quickly opened it up. It read:

Dear Twilight Sparkle,

I need you and your friends to try out a new type of magical practice that I've discovered. It involves the conjuration of different elements and using them together. Don't worry, your friends don't need to be Unicorns to use it... Please come as soon as possible, I can barely contain my excitement!

Princess Celestia

Twilight stared at the letter for a moment. She couldn't turn down a request from the Princess, but she hoped this wouldn't be dangerous...

Half an hour later, Twilight and her five friends stood in the courtyard with the Princess, preparing for some sort of speech. Fluttershy was sitting down, Pinkie was bouncing up and down, Rainbow Dash was shuffling impatiently on her hooves, Rarity was flaunting her mane and didn't seem to care too much, and Applejack was showing genuine interest.

"Hello, all of you. As I presume Twilight has already explained to you, I have picked you six to test out a new form of magical arts that I have discovered deep within the royal library." Celestia announced. A small book appeared in front of her. "The Havindr Mystic Arts, by Vlad, the Dashing Rogue That Is Most Certainly Not a Vampire." She squinted. "Wow... that is quite a mouthful. Anyhow, you all need to wear these robes," she conjured six differently-colored robes for them, "these staves," she conjured six identical staves with crescent moon designs on the tips with floating crystals, "and...It says here you need a sword of some sort, but we don't really have any of those... Oh well."

Rarity was examining her robe, which was white. "Oh, my... Your Majesty, these robes are design for bipedal creatures, which we are not!" She pointed out, alarmed. Celestia merely chuckled.

"I guess you're going to practice standing and walking on your hind legs, then." Everyone looked appalled, except for Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, who could support themselves on their hind legs pretty easily by using their wings as counterbalances. Rainbow's smug look didn't last long, however; upon closer inspection, she saw that the robe did not have wing holes. And it looked rather tight... Her wings would be useless!

"E-erm, princess, I'm not gonna be able to fly with this on..." She stated.

"You'll live." Celestia chided, smiling. "Now put them on and grab the staves." Everyone did as so, although holding the staff was rather difficult.... It turns out the robe completely cancelled out any unicorn magic. It was unaffected by it, and disabled the magic of anyone wearing it. Twilight had a dark purple robe, Fluttershy had a yellow robe, Pinkie had a...pink robe, Dash had a cyan robe, Rarity, as previously said, had a white robe, and Applejack got an orange robe. Oddly, upon donning the robes, all six ponies found it incredibly easy to stand on their hind legs. It was as if the robes had magical properties to them...

"The robes have magical properties to them," Celestia announced. Twilight resisted the urge to facehoof. "They are immune to and cancel out any unicorn magic, paralyze the wings of pegasi, and give magical structural support that enables the wearers to stand on their hind legs with little to no difficulty." The six normal ponies marveled at their outfits. "Now, pick up your staves." She requested for the second time, opening the book floating in front of her.

"Now hold on just a darn minute, if these here robes make all the non-earth ponies equal ta' earth ponies, then why wear 'em? Granted it could be for the hind legs thing, but..." Applejack interjected. Celestia looked at her, and the orange earth pony stepped backwards, a tad frightened that she said the wrong thing.

"The robes enable you to use this sort of magic. Now, listen everypony, this sort of magic requires you to chant a little. Not a lot, but still some. There are eight elements, Water, Life, Frost, Fire, Earth, Arcane, Lightning, and Shield. You need only to say the name of the element to conjure one charge of it. Different element combinations make different spells. When you are ready to cast, desire for the element charges to come together in front of you, and that will generate the spell." She paused. "The spells here are mainly offensive. Please be careful to not kill eachother... because you can do it quite fast. Fortunately, some of the most hyper-advanced spells that we know of are the most basic in this form of magic. For example, the Resurrect spell is a simple chant of 'life, lightning, resurrect!'. This means if you do accidentally kill eachother, you can bring eachother back quite easily." She smiled. Everyone was interested now.

"There are three-...no, four ways you can cast a spell. In front of you, around you, on yourself, or you can enchant your sword with it-oh..." Celestia facehoofed as she realized why the text instructed the users to have swords. Oh well...

Rainbow Dash had finally gotten a hold of her staff, and was marveling at it. "So... we just chant the names? Is that it?" She asked. Celestia nodded.

"You may only possess five at a time, however." She added. Rainbow nodded as well.

"A...arcane?" Fluttershy's quiet voice came from under her yellow hood. A small, volatile-looking red light appeared near her and started orbiting around her figure. She looked at it as it moved, supposedly smiling under her hood. Everypony else had taken their hoods off, and Applejack shortly convinced Fluttershy to do it too. Celestia started to leave.

"I'll leave you to experiment. Tomorrow you will all need to venture into dangerous Gryphon territory to settle a dispute and organize a treaty." She said, smiling, taking her leave and leaving the six garbed ponies alone in the courtyard.

"So...uhm.... where do we start?" Twilight muttered. She noticed Celestia had left the book for them, and she trotted over on her hind legs and picked it up, opening it. It contained advanced spells that required specific conjurations and incantations.

"Heh...heh heh.... A-heh... I feel taller...!" Rainbow Dash chuckled, turning her head to look next to her, at a potted plant that towered over her moments ago. By all means, due to her standing on her hind legs and her entire torso being added to her height, she was definitely at least 70% taller.

"I reckon ya' ARE taller, Dash!" Applejack exclaimed happily. "We all are!" The group shared a chuckle.

"Arcane...arcane..." Fluttershy muttered to herself, spawning more red lights that also orbited around her. They were so pretty!... She brought them in front of her, placing both hooves in front of her, and a large red laser shot out from the focal point, carving a burnt line into whatever it was hitting. Unfortunately, Dash, who was too occupied with being taller, ran into her laser. Dash screamed for just a few seconds, her robe being burnt apart, before her body swelled and exploded in a gory mess. Everyone's jaws dropped, and Fluttershy began crying in a similar fashion to when she thought she had killed Philomena, the Princess's pet phoenix. Everypony began panicking and muttering to themselves, before Twilight remembered what the princess said about the Resurrection spell.

"Everypony, calm down!" Twilight exclaimed, attempting to draw everypony's attention.

"T-T-T-Twi, sh-she j-just k-killed Dash!" Applejack muttered, trembling and shaking.

"Wait! Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash isn't gone. Remember when the princess said that the resurrection spell was the most simple spell to cast?" Everyone immediately calmed down somewhat, including Fluttershy. Twilight smiled at her.

"Just cast life, then lightning, then say 'Resurrection', and Dash will be back." Twilight casted life & lightning elements herself as she said that sentence. She guessed it didn't turn out what context you said them in; it would still conjure the elements. The advanced spells—the book called them "Magicks"--did not work this way and required the user to shout them.

"O-okay... L-life, lightning... R-resurrection!" Fluttershy said hesitantly, and the elements swarmed into a pattern of light around her. A pillar of light immediately shot down from the sky and hit a spot on the ground, where Rainbow Dash, body & robe restored, jumped out of the pavement. The rainbow-maned pegasus shook her head to clear it.

"Woaahhh...... What... What just.... where was I?" She asked, her eyes containing a small amount of derp before she blinked it away. She saw the enormous blood spatter on the ground, before a hint of terror entered her violet eyes. "Oh no..." She looked around; all five of her friends, plus herself, were alive and okay. Her terrified expression turned to one of confusion. "Wait...where'd all this blood come from?"

Rarity coughed. "W-well, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy accidentally destroyed your body with a large red laser, and then resurrected you." She smiled nervously. Dash looked at the yellow-robed pegasus, who backed away slightly. Dash fell silent for a few moments, and Fluttershy closed her eyes, expecting the worst.

"That....was....AWESOME!" Rainbow yelled with delight, throwing her front hooves up into the air. Fluttershy opened her eyes. "I don't even remember it that well! And it happened so fast, but here I am now!" She giggled to herself, something nopony had seen Dash do for quite a while. The contagious nature of the action caused everypony else to start chuckling as well. "I-It was like LIGHTNING! I love magic!" Dash cheered. A little lightning conjuration appeared and started orbiting her, but she didn't seem to notice.

"Oohhhhh....." a moan came from near where the blood spatter was. They saw Pinkie collapsed on the ground, attempting to stand up. Her robe was slightly tattered. Everypony had been wondering why she wasn't bouncing around or complimenting on anypony's antics...

"Oh... Pinkie, I'm so sorry, you must've been caught in the blast!" Fluttershy apologized, putting both hooves to her mouth.

"Uhhh.....uhhmmm... Life?" Applejack said, and a green light appeared near her. She brought it in front of her and it shot a laser that was similar in behavior to the one that just killed Rainbow. However, it repaired anything it hit, and when she tilted it to strike Pinkie, her body glowed green, her robe repaired itself, and she promptly stood up, grinning wildly. The pink earth-pony bounced to her and tackled her.

"Ohhh thankyouthankyouthankyou Applejack! I dunno what happened, I was near Rainbow Dash and when she exploded it hurt and I couldn't get up, but then I heard a PSHIIII sound and I got this warm feeling inside and I could stand up again!" Pinkie rambled. Applejack eventually bucked her off, but she landed on her feet. Erm, her hind legs, to be precise.

The group continued to practice with the new form of magic, occasionally killing eachother, but a simple resurrection spell fixed that. Surprisingly, Fluttershy had the best aim out of all of them, killing every other pony at least twice each. Rainbow once got a little too giddy with the lightning and shocked herself to death directly after a water-element splash-fight with Pinkie. Applejack destroyed a good amount of the statues in the courtyard with giant boulders, Pinkie launched herself into orbit with water-element landmines, and Rarity mostly played with the Shield element and all the possibilities that came with it, including the earth & ice armor, which she actually thought was fashionable. Twilight preferred to experiment with the Life element and the regenerative properties it had. It took them a while, but each pony learned how to mix elements and get different results. Hours later, virtually the entire courtyard (and the two horrified guards) were coated in pony blood, but not a single person was injured.

"Arcane, shield!" Pinkie chanted, creating a set of landmines. She used the same spell on herself to gain an arcane immunity aura so she wouldn't be killed by the landmines, and then stepped on them. The resulting blast launched her on top of one of the castle towers, where she landed with a resounding thunk before yelling down at her friends with a  "HEEEYYYY!!" and a hyperactive wave. Rainbow Dash was carving the message "200% COOLER!" into the wall with a rather strong beam spell, fire-water-lightning-arcane. The group soon learned that certain elements cancelled eachother out, and learned to not use them together, or use them against eachother (it caused an explosion). The whole group was laughing and having a ton of fun with their new magical abilities, experimenting with new spells, having water fights, and Applejack unfortunately joining in with Pinkie's landmine stunts, all while destroying the courtyard and leaving two pegasus guards scared to death and curled up next to the gate. The large door to the castle opened just as Twilight and Rainbow Dash were about to shoot two arcane spells at eachother to see who was stronger, revealing the princess, who gasped at what they had done to the courtyard.

Literally the ENTIRE COURTYARD was stained red, with various chunks of pony guts strewed here and there, and not a single statue, plant, or decoration remained. Celestia simply stared, wide-eyed, mouth open. Everypony suddenly looked & felt guilty. The air reeked of blood.

"Oh hi Princess Celestia, we're sorry for destroying your courtyard and all, we were just having so much fun!!~" Pinkie appealed, bouncing up and down.

"Did...Did...Did a massacre take place here?! Did you kill all my guards or something?!" Celestia shouted, losing her formality for a moment, noticing the bloodsoaked landscape. Pinkie waved a hoof at her.

"Nnnnnawwwww, it started as just practicing but turned into SPARRING and we started killing eachother for fun and sport after we realized that death wasn't serious anymore and there was a lot of red lasers and bloody explosions and now the whole place looks like this!" Pinkie replied, passively grinning. Celestia shook her head to regain her composure, and raised an eyebrow. "Fluttershy got the most kills!" The yellow pegasus whimpered at this, shrinking backward.

"Erm...alright?....Well, everypony needs to avoid killing eachother tomorrow, when you go to invade Gryphon territory and force their leader to sign a treaty." Celestia said, smiling. "Now....the two guards I sent to watch you, why are they huddled up in the corner?" She pointed out, pointing to them with a hoof. Upon actually looking at them, she saw the terrified expressions on their faces. "Ace, Fletcher, come here for a moment." She requested. The two white guard pegasi didn't move, still trembling. Celestia gained an understanding look. "Ace? Fletcher? It's okay, tell me what happened..." When they remained silent, she walked to them and lied down. In a soothing, relaxing voice, she asked "What happened?" Ace, the pegasi on the left with the green tail and mane, gulped.

"...Y...Your subjects... they were...displaying their power, and... and we didn't want to get caught up in it..." Ace replied in a shaky voice. She understood; she was gone for six hours. She smiled lovingly to them, which made them relax a little.

"I want you two to go back inside and take a breather. I'll give you the rest of today and tomorrow off." The princess told them, smiling. She stood up and nudged them inside with her muzzle. After they had closed the door behind them, she turned to face the younger ponies. "See? I can be nice." She smiled. "Now, you six can keep those robes, but keep in mind that if you are wearing them, you will be unable to fly or use your own magic. This means no telekinesis." This discouraged the pegasi and unicorns; the pegasi needed their ability to fly for everyday life, as did the unicorns their telekinesis. She turned to the two earth ponies, Applejack and Pinkie Pie. "You two. Do not destroy anything. If any of you go on some sort of crime spree, I will remove you from the mission and punish you." She threatened with a stern voice. Her kind voice and smile quickly returned though.

"Alright then, I'll see you tomorrow!" She chimed, dismissing them. The Elements of Harmony returned to their homes for a good night's sleep.